Futuristic Transsolar

[Dragongal]

Adira smiled a bit for a second. "Yes, so we can both sit in a cell and not even get to hit anything. No, I just... I want to hit whatever caused these bad things to happen, but... I can't. It's out of my control. I can't even get revenge, it's just out of my control, and I can't affect it at all, and...." She sighed and shook her head. "I just want to fix things, but it's not always fixable. I can't sleep at night, and there's nothing I can do about that short of sedatives which I refuse to use, it's - it's just another damned thing that's out of my control." Adira shook her head in frustration before taking a deep breath to keep herself from kicking something - anything. "It's just the alcohol talking, I'm sure."

 

[BookWyrm]

Vince knew what alcohol sounded like, and that wasn't it. That was the sound of grief and confusion speaking. He knew that language all too well. "I wish I could say I didn't understand what you are talking about, but I do. I wish I could tell you that I knew the answer, but I don't. I'm still looking for it myself. But, I can offer up an ear to listen. Hell, maybe it'll help both of us sleep better at night."

 

[Dragongal]

"Sleep sounds good. But I don't know what I could tell you. All I know is I fucked up. I made a promise, and I couldn't keep it. I failed." Adira finally cracked on the mental level, revealing what had been bothering her - she hadn't even known that this was it, but now that it came out in a rush, it seemed like something she should have realized sooner. She slowed from walking util she was standing still in front of a window in the empty hallway. At orbit, the planet could be seen under them. All of the sudden she just cracked, frustrated by her lack of words. "I promised her, Vince! I promised her that I'd keep her safe, when we were on the transport down! I lied, I feel like a traitor, like some useless piece of shit, I couldn't keep my promise, so why am I even Captain?! Why should she have trusted me?! Why should anyone trust me? I don't now why people even trust me! I couldn't keep a simple promise. I'm a failure. I - I...." Adira was shaking and tears were running down her cheeks now. She'd never let herself release emotion like that, the most she would do was just stay in her room and hit things, which wasn't very satisfying. She got quiet as she continued, "People keep trusting me and I can't protect them. I - I know that they know I can't always keep them safe, but... I should be able to. Even all those years ago, they trusted me and I couldn't keep them safe. They trusted me, it was the only way they could sleep at night, and.... It wasn't my fault, none of it was, but.... They trusted me...."

 

[BookWyrm]

Vince had walked over to Adira's side as they looked out the window, though once she started her confession his eyes fell on her instead. In many ways it broke him seeing her like this. He'd felt similar at one time, though from a different situation. How could he say anything that wouldn't be as bad as pouring lemon juice into an open wound? He had an idea, but the thought of it caused him to struggle. Finally, though, he caved in. Perhaps with more sentiment than he knew he had left in him, Vince wrapped his arms around Adira and hugged her tight. It felt so foreign to him, but at the same time he didn't know what else to do. He couldn't offer any words of advice or wisdom that could comfort her. Besides, right now she didn't seem like she wanted someone to fix this. If all she needed was a shoulder to cry on he could volunteer for that.

 

[Spazzycat101]

Lydia was still scribbling away on her paper, several crumbled sheets and a scarce few unspoiled ones scattered haphazardly around her. The tools from earlier now remained untouched for a while, and the sheets that took up whatever space the equipment didn't depicted various details of their arachnid 'friends.' Though it was vague, there were several 'blueprint' sketches of how the joints in the legs might work-- she hadn't gotten a close enough look to determine the mechanics exactly, but she was modeling most of the drawings after known spider species. After all, when given similar environments, life tends to evolve in similar fashions.


It was while she was obsessing over the detail of the spiders' navigation that she heard the small click that preceded a ship-wide announcement.


A day off?


Lydia put aside the paper, pencil and nearly-spent eraser. A day off? She began wondering, would it seem peculiar to anyone that she continue working on this 'day off,' and would they investigate what she was doing? Anyone who had gone to the moon's surface might not think it a good idea, especially Adira. Definitely Adira. Still, a day off could be used for research that wasn't centered around what they had planned to collect, the various samples of flora that still found themselves bagged up, untouched since their return to the Lullaby.


Now that even for a moment, her attention was drawn from the distraction itself, she began to realize how uncomfortable she was, having been curled up in the same position for... How long? Lydia didn't know, nor did she care really.


She relocated herself from the small desk almost unseen through both clear and torn pieces of paper to the bed, which had begun its own collection as well. She brushed her work almost carelessly aside to let herself sit. Even if she disliked the idea of a day off instead of... something more proper, she would still be utilizing what was given in Rea's honor.

 

[Dragongal]

Adira's muscles tensed a bit reflexively before she slowly relaxed. She had no idea where that outburst had come from. But it had felt good. After a few moments, she stepped back, wiping off her eyes. "I-I'm sorry... must have been the alcohol...." She had even slipped so much as to reference her past. With all the nightmares lately, it was sometimes hard to not think about it. But she had shown emotional weakness, and that wasn't okay with her. It felt good, but it wasn't okay. Others could show emotion and show pain, but she didn't allow herself that. "I guess I just must be tired...."

 

[Marianne]

Sandy laughed, "Excuse me, Sir," she exaggerated, "I can assure you I was not apologizing because my words hurt or insulted you. I apologized for not knowing who my boss actually was, for he sounds human in the Communicators ― and to be told he isn't is awfully surprising —" the female took a moment, excusing herself as she sneezed abruptly and quietly - it sounded like: "Atew!" rather than the usual 'Achoo'. After she blushed and quietly rubbed at her nose, she looked up at Saami to make sure had not witnessed her head lashing downward for the sake of a sneeze. In doing so, Sandy wounded up admiring him, for his hair ridiculously resembled a canvas. What, with Odian's glow reflecting as its colors danced on her Director's head; she suddenly found its lack of melanin extraordinary, and she was suddenly feeling warily envious. To her, it was like looking at clear strands of uncolored silk forming the most heavenly color on a blessed m- on a very unique young man - no. . .

​

Frowning in both confusion, curiosity, and frustration, Saundary asked, very slowly, "Saami, who informed you that you were mis-made?" Her brows furrowed with her down casted lips, and emphasis, whilst she waited patiently for his response. Pleasing herself, of course, with the light show on his head.

​

 

[InsanEleven]

Saami looked at his screens listening to the odd sounds coming from the girl, up until the sneeze after which she fell awfully silent and he could nearly feel her admiring stare burn. The second question didn't come as a surprise, what did though was the empathy in it despite him having told her he was akin to a machine. He knew most saw him too much as a tool after that to really care using empathy.


So this time he turned around out of more than just protocolled politeness, simple repaying friendliness at the least, fascination at most.


"My creators Miss Etrasmus. Empirical evidence supports their claim." He pulled up several photographs of the original INANES, whom were broad, tall and definitely more soldierly than him. Despite him not being short himself, it was very clear he wasn't strong or sturdy in any sense of the word. "Had I been correctly manufactured, my appearance and physiology would match theirs. They do not, so therefore I am mismade." It was basic logic; and if the premisses were correct, the conclusion would be too. Though it never told much about how true the correct conclusion was, but he wasn't supposed to know that.

 

[Marianne]

Sandy's eyes narrowed, after she recovered from the brief shock that Saami actually turned around to address her. Intently, she listened to the words that came out of his mouth, and a tad bit too passionately, she spoke in a heart beat accordance to his response. "But what if you weren't actually a mistake? Most mistakes a trashed, i've seen it happen, people trash their mistakes often just as much as they tend to them, fixing them, and accepting them for what they were." This time she was frowning deeply, mainly upset with his creators more than she was with the fact that people classified him as a mis-made INANES. "Nothing, living, working, or functioning properly is 'mismade' - a mistake - because one says so. It may not be what they had intended, but in the end everything has its purpose, and you're still living to prove my theory correct," she haughtily, whilst unintentionally, spoke her thoughts. And so, she adverted her eyes, her pearly petals puckered into a pout before she returned her gaze back to her boss; cherry colored eyes fierce, yet gentle all the same, appeared to be troubled as she ended with, "Just because you don't match doesn't mean you're mis-made, they could be holding you back from something bigger." Sandy mumbled the last part, not wanting to be heard as she chewed on the inside of her cheek in embarrassment. Closing her eyes, she groaned quietly; running a frustrated hand through her short azure locks. Just thinking about the things she has heard regarding her boss, Saami, upset her. There are people who don't respect him personally, but enough to get their job done - and INANES or not, he was still a man worthy of respect. However, Respect is earned not given.

​

 

[InsanEleven]

Saami

​

Saami stared at her quietly with unchanging turquoise eyes, surprised with her sudden outburst, and not entirely agreeing with it, but never showing that. When she finished her words he just tilted his head like a mechanical doll falling sideways a little.


"I do not understand your reasoning fully miss Etrasmus. In case of a misunderstanding let me rephrase my earlier words in reply to yours; I am not functioning properly, and they 'fixed' their mistake, by putting me in a makeshift position where I still have some purpose. Me fulfilling a different purpose is a direct consequence of me being mismade. I assume this clears the misunderstanding." It wasn't quite a misunderstanding from her part to begin with, but he could never admit to understanding her frustration and passion. Those were two things he simply wasn't allowed to understand, and he would always have to meet with not understanding or misinterpreting. He was moved by her words, but nothing in a mechanical expression could show that, so instead he just stared at her until he found proof of her reacting or accepting his words, after which he could determine his next action.

Nadanya

​

She took her loss badly, her temper clearly not helped any by it. Grumpily she pushed her part of the money over to Mr. Scruffy. "Don't think this is over yet, I have the Gods on my side and they will not let me down!" She exclaimed loudly as she took the cards and dealt them herself once more, even though she was running on her last few Solar Credits. Good thing the job as an engineer paid well and who really needed the money on a ship where everything was provided?


A few rounds and another bottle of red wine later she was completely out of money. Running through the halls cursing the devils that had deceived her on a huge electricity rush. Every step she took sparks flew around, and the lights grew brighter when she passed as her body tried to get rid of all the energy provided by her body quickly burning alcohol. She couldn't get drunk as it was broken down far too quickly. But that didn't mean she wasn't acting erratic from the electricity, kicking the walls and yelling loudly in her rush.

 

[BookWyrm]

Vince looked at Adira carefully, trying his best to think of something other than the slightly awkward hug they just shared. "The alcohol might have helped loosen your tongue a little bit, but from how that sounded it came from your heart." He felt weird talking about such personal matters, especially emotional subjects. "Sometimes it doesn't pay to hide everything inside. Eventually everything comes to the surface." He reached back and scratched at his neck. Everything...

 

[Dragongal]

Adira shrugged a bit. "Well, I can pretend." Pretend everything was fine and maybe things might progress as if they were. Adira looked at him, then after a few seconds quietly said, "Vince... are you okay? I don't think it's just Rea that's bothering you, either...."

 

[BookWyrm]

Vince looked at Adira carefully, his eyes darting over her features for some kind of knowing. What does she know? Was he okay? No, far from it actually. His body tensed up as he felt the familiar coiling and shifting under his skin. That horridly uncomfortable sensation that reminded him that he wasn't completely human anymore. "Just dealing with some recurring issues. You know, the type that once it gets under you skin it'll irritate you for years."

 

[Dragongal]

Adira slowly nodded, deciding to take his words at face value and not look in any deeper. She'd remember his comment, though. Something to think on when she was completely sober. "Well, if you ever need help, or just want to talk... I'm available." After a few moments, she quietly said, "It's getting late...." Time to go sit in her room and clean her gun until she passed out from exhaustion, then had to deal with the nightmares. She was uncomfortable with the idea of sleep, to say the least.

 

[BookWyrm]

Vince nodded before starting off down the hallway again. "The least I can do is see the Captain to her room." It wasn't that he really wanted to end the conversation, but he also didn't feel like sticking around one space for too long. That, and just mentioning his past prickled the hairs on the back of his neck. Especially that part of my past.

 

[Marianne]

If it wasn't already obvious, Saundary didn't understand, and she admitted it: "I don't understand." And it was plausible, for she never had encountered an INANES, directly, 'till now. Now, she was unsure of what to do, or say, for Saami has already answered the majority of her questions. Decidedly, she placed an index finger atop her lips and tapped it three times before she cupped her bottom lip with her thumb and bit on it's nail. "Saami, do you think?" She peered at him for a moment and then continued. "Do you believe in chances?" As she asked these questions Sandy was glancing at the entrance, and everywhere else around the Bridge as a sudden idea came to mind. Now, she wasn't sure if it was good, but she wanted to act on it somehow. If anything, if one were to think thoroughly about this, they would think she was still intoxicated, and that too was plausible, but even Sandy wasn't sure.

​

 

[InsanEleven]

Saami stared at her a bit pretending to calculate an answer, while he was actually wondering why she'd ask such a question while staring around the room. Whatever it was she was planning on, he doubted it was anything not mischievous. She didn't seem like the person to sit around following the rules, not like him. "Of course I think Miss Etrasmus, otherwise I would be an object." Otherwise he could just as well be a cold, lifeless machine, in fact that was the reason INANES were different from machines. He could think, yet... "As for your other question I can not believe in anything. However I do encounter chances in my calculations at all time, so I can confirm they appear within my life in a certain form." He was talking about quantum-mechanical chances, not the godly, spiritual or fatal forms, but perhaps it was better she didn't know that. He would appear oddly boring if his life was a solely mathematical and functional existence, and if anything it wasn't. Despite him pretending that it was.

 

[Dragongal]

Adira paused outside her door. She didn't want to be left alone without a distraction. She didn't want to fall asleep. She didn't want to be left alone to her thoughts. After a few seconds, she said, "You know, I have a couple good bottles of synthehol in my quarters - whiskey, rum, beer... Honestly, there's no way I'm going to sleep any time soon, so, would you like some of the synthehol? You can't tell it from the real stuff, I promise...."

 

[BookWyrm]

Vince stood in silence for a few moments as he thought over Adira's offer. He wasn't exactly ready to sleep himself, and the offer of synthehol and good company sounded nice. Finally Vince looked up at Adira and smiled as he said, "I could go for a beer." Vince looked around the hallway just to make sure no one was around before following Adira into her quarters. There was something about the door being shut behind them that caused Vince to visibly relax. His whole disposition calmed, and he finally seemed to unwind to some degree. "I would have never really put it by to keep a secret stash of synthehol in your quarters. Not that I would ever reveal it to anyone. Though if someone happened to find the Captain and Officer of Defense drinking together in the Captain's quarters they might think oddly of it."

 

[Dragongal]

Adira chuckled, glad he had accepted. "Why, we're just talking over the plans for safety next time we go down to the planet, right?" Adira walked over to her closet and opened a drawer, pulling out a few bottles of synthetic beer and a large bottle of synthetic rum and a glass. She set them on a small table and took her seat in one of the large chairs. Fr a second she visibly tensed, then grimaced and let out a long sigh as she rolled her shoulders back. That had hurt.

 

[BookWyrm]

Vince looked over the synth beer and smiled. "Good taste in beer.", he said as he popped the cap off and took a gulp. He sighed quite contently as he sat across from Adira. It felt good to relax some, especially after such a stressful first mission. "I think it'll be nice having a day off tomorrow. That wasn't a bad call by the way." Vince watched Adira as she rolled her shoulders around. "You feeling okay?"

 

[Dragongal]

Adira shrugged and cracked her neck. He had seen what her back looked like, she didn't have to lie or explain anything. "Old wounds ache once in a while. I'm fine." Adira poured herself some of the rum and drank until her glass was empty before pouring herself another. After a few quiet moments, she asked, "Woods... does alcohol make the nightmares any better for you? It doesn't normally for me, I fall asleep faster but wake up in the same panic...." She glanced up at him, then back to the glass in her hand. "First couple nights on this ship I tried drinking synthehol until I was nearly incoherent - no hangovers, you see. Didn't work, though.... Nightmares bugged me anyway."

 

[Spazzycat101]

After a very long time spent staring around her room at the numerous sketches, various pieces of equipment, and some miscellaneous things scattered on the floor and desk, Lydia reluctantly organized some of which was organizable into groups, stacks, or even just sloppy piles. It was quite unlike her to act so careless, or just plain uninterested in any project, whether it be official or self-assigned.


Once some of the surface of her desk was visible, Lydia was satisfied. She replaced the webbing in its plastic bag and gathered up what she had relocated from the lab into her room, taking her two separate trips to return all of the equipment to its original place. After that, the biochemist retrieved her tablet on which she expected her notes from the webbing, but only finding a few, distracted-looking comments. Lydia returned to her room, deciding to keep the sample of web away from the lab. She expected nothing good if anyone guessed that she had intentions to wipe the blind arachnids from where they hid. She couldn't did the thought from her mind that it would be far easier if she could have snuck a sample of actual spider instead of just a scrap of web.


Lydia took to wandering among the hallways, blindly following a small map of the ship in her mind. Eventually, her footsteps came and went past the people-filled lounge, the half-empty mesh hall, and several other places that she only partially registered as 'there.' She had a bitter taste lingering in her mouth but from what she couldn't tell. Lydia was in desperate need of some kind of distraction from her miniature obsession with the spiders, but she couldn't focus on anything at all. The only thing she seemed to be able to do properly at the moment was avoid people, which she was rather successful at considering she had just arrived again outside the door of her own room. Distracted, right...

 

[BookWyrm]

Vince watched Adira as she drained her glass only to fill it up again. He thought about his own dealings with sedatives and alcohol. We're more alike than either of us care to admit. Finally he shook his head with a sigh. "I've tried drowning my nightmares in beer or whiskey before, but it never helps. Most of the time it makes them worse." He turned his bottle up and drained it before opening another. "I guess you're wondering why I still drink. Its not really for the nightmares, or well, not those nightmares." Vince took a couple of swigs from the bottle before staring off at the wall for a few moments. "I sometimes wonder if I'm even human anymore. With what I've been through, what they did to me and spliced into me, I am sometimes amazed that it hasn't changed me completely."

 

[Dragongal]

Adira looked at Woods for a few moments. For some reason, in her mind this made a connection with what he'd said earlier about problems getting beneath the skin. He seemed... upset. She quietly said, "Woods... why do you put so much emphasis on it? It makes it sound like one thing in particular, not just the splicing.... You know you can tell me. God, I can only imagine what you've figured out about my past. You can trust me with this."