ohdittoh
still kicking :)
LINDSAY MORGAN KAY
“Little circle, little circle, one big cir-cle, little circle, little circle, one big cir-cle, little circle, little circle, one big cir-cle, double-u, double-u, double-u, double-u nipplenipplenipplenipplenipplenipplenipple, e-e-e-e-e.”
As the song he was singing beneath his breath finished and his Sharpie completed the last e, Lin leaned back from he mirror with a wide, proud grin on his face, his eyes alight with a glow not unlike that in the eyes of a new father or of a sculptor whose last five years’ work had finally come to fruition.
Mrs. Piggy had nothing on this pig, luhmao — it was the best damn pig ever, lop-sided eyes, three sets of nipples (and an extra lone ranger nipple to the left), extra-long tail, and all. It almost brought a tear to his eyes (sniffle).
But…
His brows furrowed, and he tapped the pen’s cap on his chin, squinting at the image he’d created as Zeph shuffled in the background. “Hmmm…” Something was missing. He leaned forward again, poising his pen on the glass of the mirror once more. As he began to meticulously scrawl letters in the metallic ink, he sounded, beneath his breath, “Aaaaangel…S-e-r-v-a-n-t-i-s…wuuuuuuuz…heeere…ex-cla-ma-tion point…ques-tee-own mark…period.”
Proudly leaning back from the mirror once more, he blossomed his free hand outward, opening his palm and wiggling his fingers in the direction of his graffiti. “Booom-shaka-em-effin’-lacka.”
"Dude, look at this.”
He looked over his shoulder to see his larger friend investigating a mysterious-looking metal box. Lin’s eyes widened curiously, and he dropped his pen carelessly in the sink — rattle, rattle. He approached Zeph with an intrigued expression.
“Gross,” Zeph commented.
“Duuuuuude…” A look of confused amazement came over his face. “Ewwwww…why do they have that in here?” He narrowed his eyes at the thing. “I didn’ even know these existed…it’s like those weird condom machines at gas stations, but instead it’s for…” He looked over at Zeph. “Dude, you put a quarter in and it gives you something to shove up your hoohaa…like a gumball machine but instead of gum it’s coochie stuffing,” he concluded wisely, then he looked back at the machine.
“Why do they sell tampons in the..."
Lin was too busy studying the contraption to listen to Zeph, or hear the realization in his voice.
"Lin —“
There was a squee as the hinge of the door flung open, and then a high-pitched screech from the doorway.
In sync with Zeph, Lin looked to the door with wide eyes. “10-40, geezer alert,” Lin muttered. “Shit.”
It was an old, wrinkled lady, crooking an arthritic, red-painted finger at the two. “Boys! There’s boys in the ladies’ room!”
Ladies’…
All at once, it dawned on Lin.
A rush of adrenaline shot through him, and he looked at Zeph. “DEPLOY EVASIVE ACTION!” he yelled, looking at Zeph with wide eyes as he took a few quick, sideways steps towards the woman.“AGENT ZEPTUHPUG, YOU BIG, SEXY BEAST, YOU JUST STAND THERE AND ACT LIKE A TREE, I’VE GOT THIS.“ He held his hand up soothingly, then looked at the woman.
For a beat, he smiled at her, taking a step towards her and drawing in a breath as though he was going to try and talk his way out of this.
And then he reached out, snatched her purse, and — YEET — threw it across the bathroom.
His feet took off as soon as the bag left his hand, turning sideways to squeeze past the elderly woman and rush out into the hall, his head ducked. “GO, GO, GO!” he yelled as he booked it as fast as he could, hardly even dodging people and mores ramming his shoulders into them to get past. The words were directed at Zeph, but he wasn’t sure if he’d heard them.
Adrenaline.
It was flowing through him like a drug. The further he got away from the bathroom, the wider his grin grew, his panic shifting to exhilaration as his legs padded as hard as they could go against the carpeted floors of the theater.
He cackled happily, whooping every so often as he continued to push through people until finally, he jerked to the left and shoved open the door to the side door to the parking lot with his shoulder.
Spilling onto the sidewalk and stumbling a few steps sideways, the boy laughingly looked back through the glass doors. He took a couple of steps towards them, peeking back through them to look inside, and when he saw no one following him, he jumped back and threw his fists in the air. “WOO!” he cheered. “Fuck yeah!” He slammed his fists at his side and gave an intense pelvic thrust, then pressed his hands to his knees and gave a few ceremonious twerks. “Hell yeah!”
Laughing, he took a few steps back, and then he realized, and his face fell slightly. “Oh shit.”
No one had been following him.
He turned away from the door and pulled his phone from his pocket, walking to a white SUV and leaning against the side as he searched for Zeph’s contact. He pressed the call button, leaning off the side of the SUV for a moment to prop himself up with his elbow.
After a moment, the dial tone turned off, and Lin immediately launched into, “Testing, testing, one, two, skip a few, ninety-nine, one-hundo — you read me, Evergreen?” Looking up at the sky hopefully, he asked, “You still alive? Do you need your big, strong Lin to come rescue you?”
As the song he was singing beneath his breath finished and his Sharpie completed the last e, Lin leaned back from he mirror with a wide, proud grin on his face, his eyes alight with a glow not unlike that in the eyes of a new father or of a sculptor whose last five years’ work had finally come to fruition.
Mrs. Piggy had nothing on this pig, luhmao — it was the best damn pig ever, lop-sided eyes, three sets of nipples (and an extra lone ranger nipple to the left), extra-long tail, and all. It almost brought a tear to his eyes (sniffle).
But…
His brows furrowed, and he tapped the pen’s cap on his chin, squinting at the image he’d created as Zeph shuffled in the background. “Hmmm…” Something was missing. He leaned forward again, poising his pen on the glass of the mirror once more. As he began to meticulously scrawl letters in the metallic ink, he sounded, beneath his breath, “Aaaaangel…S-e-r-v-a-n-t-i-s…wuuuuuuuz…heeere…ex-cla-ma-tion point…ques-tee-own mark…period.”
Proudly leaning back from the mirror once more, he blossomed his free hand outward, opening his palm and wiggling his fingers in the direction of his graffiti. “Booom-shaka-em-effin’-lacka.”
"Dude, look at this.”
He looked over his shoulder to see his larger friend investigating a mysterious-looking metal box. Lin’s eyes widened curiously, and he dropped his pen carelessly in the sink — rattle, rattle. He approached Zeph with an intrigued expression.
“Gross,” Zeph commented.
“Duuuuuude…” A look of confused amazement came over his face. “Ewwwww…why do they have that in here?” He narrowed his eyes at the thing. “I didn’ even know these existed…it’s like those weird condom machines at gas stations, but instead it’s for…” He looked over at Zeph. “Dude, you put a quarter in and it gives you something to shove up your hoohaa…like a gumball machine but instead of gum it’s coochie stuffing,” he concluded wisely, then he looked back at the machine.
“Why do they sell tampons in the..."
Lin was too busy studying the contraption to listen to Zeph, or hear the realization in his voice.
"Lin —“
There was a squee as the hinge of the door flung open, and then a high-pitched screech from the doorway.
In sync with Zeph, Lin looked to the door with wide eyes. “10-40, geezer alert,” Lin muttered. “Shit.”
It was an old, wrinkled lady, crooking an arthritic, red-painted finger at the two. “Boys! There’s boys in the ladies’ room!”
Ladies’…
All at once, it dawned on Lin.
A rush of adrenaline shot through him, and he looked at Zeph. “DEPLOY EVASIVE ACTION!” he yelled, looking at Zeph with wide eyes as he took a few quick, sideways steps towards the woman.“AGENT ZEPTUHPUG, YOU BIG, SEXY BEAST, YOU JUST STAND THERE AND ACT LIKE A TREE, I’VE GOT THIS.“ He held his hand up soothingly, then looked at the woman.
For a beat, he smiled at her, taking a step towards her and drawing in a breath as though he was going to try and talk his way out of this.
And then he reached out, snatched her purse, and — YEET — threw it across the bathroom.
His feet took off as soon as the bag left his hand, turning sideways to squeeze past the elderly woman and rush out into the hall, his head ducked. “GO, GO, GO!” he yelled as he booked it as fast as he could, hardly even dodging people and mores ramming his shoulders into them to get past. The words were directed at Zeph, but he wasn’t sure if he’d heard them.
Adrenaline.
It was flowing through him like a drug. The further he got away from the bathroom, the wider his grin grew, his panic shifting to exhilaration as his legs padded as hard as they could go against the carpeted floors of the theater.
He cackled happily, whooping every so often as he continued to push through people until finally, he jerked to the left and shoved open the door to the side door to the parking lot with his shoulder.
Spilling onto the sidewalk and stumbling a few steps sideways, the boy laughingly looked back through the glass doors. He took a couple of steps towards them, peeking back through them to look inside, and when he saw no one following him, he jumped back and threw his fists in the air. “WOO!” he cheered. “Fuck yeah!” He slammed his fists at his side and gave an intense pelvic thrust, then pressed his hands to his knees and gave a few ceremonious twerks. “Hell yeah!”
Laughing, he took a few steps back, and then he realized, and his face fell slightly. “Oh shit.”
No one had been following him.
He turned away from the door and pulled his phone from his pocket, walking to a white SUV and leaning against the side as he searched for Zeph’s contact. He pressed the call button, leaning off the side of the SUV for a moment to prop himself up with his elbow.
After a moment, the dial tone turned off, and Lin immediately launched into, “Testing, testing, one, two, skip a few, ninety-nine, one-hundo — you read me, Evergreen?” Looking up at the sky hopefully, he asked, “You still alive? Do you need your big, strong Lin to come rescue you?”
mood
DEPLOY EVASIVE MANEUVER LMAO
location
the celestial theater
outfit
feesh
DEPLOY EVASIVE MANEUVER LMAO
location
the celestial theater
outfit
feesh
playing...
voldemort
voldemort
by lindsay kay