Fandom Tale of Two Survivors { The Last of Us 1x1 with icedthemoon }

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Carlos turned and rubbed his thumb over Kaleb’s cheek. “Of course not my sweet. You are the single good thing that came from those horrible people. You were never like the rest of them.” He looks back towards Alex and Nate. “I think truth or dare is a perfect idea. You are far more fun than your stoic buddy.”

Nate raised an eyebrow at Kaleb. There were several comments now that made him question some things. The talk of Kaleb being the only one who didn’t care about the mural at a QZ. The mentions of no longer being a guard. The FEDRA comment just now. He didn’t put it together until then. He wasn’t sure how to feel about that. Was this man really an ex FEDRA officer? And the other was an insatiable flirt with his Alex? “Yes,” he said suddenly. “I think you’re right. Let’s play truth or dare. Have some fun.” But as he said it, he held tight to Alex. He trusted these people, right? He was trusting. But should he be?
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Alex smiled at the fact that both Carlos and Nate wanted to do truth or dare. Though he was wondering just why Nate suddenly changed his mind. He squirmed a little at the tight hold that Nate had on him. He needed a little breathing room. He twisted a little so he wasn’t as close and felt like he could breathe now. “Okay. So how does one start this game?” Alex asked, eyes lit up like a little kid. He didn’t much care that Kaleb could’ve been a FEDRA officer. He wasn’t a WLF or a Seraphite so Alex didn’t care. He seemed nice enough.

Kaleb smiled as he felt Carlos rub his thumb over his cheek. “I didn’t think so. You’re too sweet my love.” Kaleb said before turning to look at Nate and Alex. “Okay. Let’s play some truth or dare. I’ll go first. Okay, Carlos. Truth or Dare?” He asked.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Carlos clapped once. He loved any kind of game. He loved anything that was fun or entertaining. This was sure to be fun. He gave his full attention to Kaleb. “Hmmm. Dare. Give me your best shot, beautiful.” Nate noticed Alex’s squirm and realized he must have been making things uncomfortable for him. He frowned and let him go, but it was unwillingly. He scooched himself back a little and crossed his arms over his chest.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Alex felt bad for a moment when Nate let him go and scooched back a little. His head turned back to look at the other two with a wide smile. Kaleb grinned at Carlos when he said dare. He thought for a moment before he had one come to him. “Okay dear, I dare you to kiss any person in this room you want.” Kaleb said, a smile on his face as he waited.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Carlos leaned forward, listening intently to his partner. As soon as he said the dare, a wide smile spread, probably bigger than any other smile he had given that day. “You know me so well, don’t you, my love?” He raised his eyebrows to give a knowing look to the man who knew him better than anyone else in the entire world before he turned to face the other two. He put his hands out for just a moment, and in that time, Nate realized exactly what Carlos was going to do. His entire body went rigid. Carlos whipped his body around to move right in front of Alex. “Hey, Handsome. It’s your lucky day.” And before anyone could say anything else, his hands were covering Alex’s cheeks, fingers in his hair, and his lips were very much against Alex’s. Carlos, loved kisses. In fact, he had kissed a lot of people. He was very much experienced at this. Nate could tell as he watched, holding his breath. His face was frozen so that it did not show just how much that hurt. When Carlos pulled away, he kept their foreheads together. “That’s the Carlos special,” he laughed before moving back to his spot beside Kaleb.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Alex listened to the dare that Kaleb had given Carlos. He watched as the man smiled wider than Alex had ever seen him. Alex wasn’t sure who he’d choose, but he was definitely watching. He noticed that Carlos turned towards them, hands out before he faced Alex, moving his entire body so that he was looking at him. Alex felt his face go bright red as he heard Carlos tell him it was his lucky day and then he felt both of Carlos’ hands on his cheeks and fingers in his hair. Alex had never kissed anyone before but when Carlos kissed him, it made his stomach flutter and heart rate increase. He actually found himself giving into the kiss before Carlos pulled away, leaving their foreheads touching. “Wow..” Alex breathed out as he heard Carlos talk to him. And then he was gone back over to Kaleb. Alex watched him go, a hand going up to touch his lips briefly before he felt the redness in his cheeks go away.

Kaleb knew exactly what would happen, and who he’d pick. Like Carlos said, Kaleb knew him better than anyone. “Alright, Nate. You wanna go?” He asked the man who had seemed to freeze during Carlos’ dare.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Carlos winked at Alex as he saw him reeling from the kiss. He knew it was good. This was what he did. He was very good at kissing. It was almost like a hobby. He loved people. He loved to be with people. And this man was someone who needed to be with people. Carlos was not sure about his background or history, but he could tell that Alex was severely lacking. So, this may have been for the full experience, he had never played truth or dare after all, but it was also because he was just so attractive, there was no way that Carlos would be satisfied without doing something with this gorgeous being. “There’s always more where that came from,” he breathed and pointed to his own lips as he raised his eyebrows.

Nate did not move. He did not react. He did not breathe.
His attention only came back when Kaleb said his name. He stared for probably too long before saying, “Sure.” His voice lost all the cheer. All the color. But he really had not had it all that much as of late. “Kaleb,” because this was the one thing he could control. “Truth or dare?” He smiled, and though he would likely fool Carlos and Kaleb, it may not fool Alex if he were able to focus enough even to notice. It was safe to assume that he was distracted. He kept his arms crossed. Eyes open. Jaw locked.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Alex was definitely in a mini daze from that kiss. He blushed at the wink from Carlos and looked away shyly. He wasn’t used to the attention but he definitely didn’t mind it. It made him feel all weird inside. Alex looked back at him when he heard Carlos say there was more where that came from. Alex’s eyes widened, before they glanced at Carlos’ lips then looked away again. He didn’t understand it, but he kind of did want to kiss Carlos again. Or maybe Nate? He wondered what kissing Nate would be like. Alex looked at Nate with a smile when he asked Kaleb truth or dare. But something wasn’t quite right with Nate, Alex just didn’t know what.

Kaleb nodded when Nate asked him truth or dare. “Truth” Kaleb answered. He wasn’t sure what kind of dares Nate would think of.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

“Truth,” Nate repeated. Good. That was what he wanted. He could not even think of a dare he would ask of anyone. When he used to play this with the boys, they could come up with all sorts of wild things. It was so fun. But now, in this moment where he felt like his world was collapsing in on him, he couldn’t think of anything. “So. You’re a FEDRA officer. Or were.” He could not keep the vile bias from his voice. It was almost like when he spoke to Alex about mercy. That one time he let it come from him. “Why’d you leave?”

Carlos, who was utterly enamored by the beautiful face on Alex, slowly turned his attention to Nate. To this point, he could not get a good read on who he was. From the moment they met, he seemed friendly but not necessarily very open. He was attached to Alex, but really, who wouldn’t be? It reminded him of his own faithful attachment to Kaleb in a way. No matter how much he was absolutely loving having Handsome Alex around, he loved his Kaleb. But there was always more than enough love to go around. But now- no. There was no love in those words. That was a something more sinister, and it was directed towards his companion. Carlos watched, carefully.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Alex had finally gotten over his daze when he heard Nate. His head turned to look at him. He hadn’t heard that tone in a while. He heard it when Nate was talking about mercy. What was wrong with him? Alex heard him mention FEDRA and then he looked at Kaleb and then at Carlos. He was confused, concerned and a little nervous. Alex slid a few feet away, closer to Carlos than Nate.

Kaleb crossed his arms, looking at the man. He could hear the vile tone, the bias and he narrowed his eyes. “I was FEDRA once. I didn’t agree with their stance and how they operated. I left the Denver QZ and FEDRA and never looked back.” Kaleb answered honestly.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Nate stared at this man who saved them. Helped them out of a bad situation. Found them shelter. Kept his Alex safe. This man who stood guard like a soldier. Gave orders like an officer. Threatened his Alex’s safety. He sized him up. Who are you really, ex-FEDRA officer? Didn’t agree and never looked back but still carried himself with authority. Authority over other people. “Hm.” Clipped. Short. Almost angry. That was all he said.

Carlos was simultaneously intrigued by this sudden shift in personality and also unimpressed. He didn’t care about backgrounds. People were raised in horrible places, and sometimes they did horrible things. The important part is when they realize that the way they were raised was wrong. Like Kaleb. He was a shining example of that. So who was Nate? “Glasses-“ Nate grimaced. “Do you have a problem with Kaleb? Because that might prove to be a difficult situation in this budding familialship.”

Nate barely flicked his eyes towards Carlos before moving them back to Kaleb, arms still firmly over his chest. “No. Please. Go back to your game.”
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Alex watched Nate, how he stared at Kaleb. His tone and how he seemed to be upset, or almost angry. It reminded Alex of back in the forest. And he didn’t like it. He didn’t like it then and he doesn’t like it now. Alex knew that FEDRA wasn’t much better than the WLF, but clearly Kaleb didn’t agree so he tried to change by leaving, much like Alex had when he left Seattle. Alex didn’t know what was going on, but he moved just a little closer to Carlos again. This wasn’t Nate, wasn’t who he knew Nate to be. And it was unsettling.

Kaleb stared back at Nate, not breaking eye contact. He could see that this man didn’t like him anymore. Clearly something happened to him. “Okay. My turn again. Nate. Truth or Dare.” Kaleb said, taking another turn even though it probably should’ve been someone else going. He hoped that Nate would pick truth.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Nate could feel the eyes on him, and he did not care. Fine. They can watch. They can observe. They can think that he’s overreacting or crazy or whatever they wanted to think. He could not help but notice that this was not a question. This was an order. An order from a FEDRA officer. Of course it was. Left the place but not the mentality. Of course. “You’re going to ask it anyway so go ahead. Ask me for my truth.”

Carlos didn’t like this. This felt far more confrontational than he was expecting. Earlier, Kaleb had a knife to Alex, and Nate was far less aggressive. Other than whatever it was he did as a distraction, Nate had yet to do anything outwardly aggressive to anyone. He didn’t seem to be a fighter. He asked for help. He thanked people. He offered aide like a medic. One of those good people he thought. But he wasn’t sure what this was. He thought maybe this could have been jealousy, but that would not explain why all of this was now very heavily directed towards Kaleb. Kaleb could handle himself, and for now he would wait, but he would not allow it to get much worse.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Alex was absolutely confused and a little annoyed now. This was supposed to be a fun time, something to get his mind off the nightmare and maybe bond a little with the other two. Alex had enough, he slowly got to his feet and moved himself so he was almost almost touching Carlos when he sat back down slowly. He didn't like how Nate was acting, he didn't like it back then either. And so he chose to stay away from him. Probably a dumb choice but he didn't care. Not anymore.

Kaleb could hear that tone and he didn't like it. Swallowing his pride, he adjusted himself. "Okay. What do you have against me, or is this just because I was an officer for FEDRA?" He figured that was a fair question. Given how the atmosphere had changed, he could surmise that the man before him was a former Firefly but he wanted to hear it from Nate himself.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Carlos shifted so that now he was closer to Nate than anyone else. If Nate was going to get progressively grumpier about whatever was going on, Carlos was going to be the first line of defense. Or maybe offense if that was what it came to. He was also prepared to move one of his people, Alex included, out of the way if that was how this was going to go. He didn’t want that obviously, and it seemed out of character for this man he had never seen do anything aggressive other than this moment, but he was prepared for anything.

Nate stared unwaveringly back. “Was? Are any of you ever done being who you are?” The smile was gone. There was nothing left of it. Not even the faintest hints. All he could see were the soldiers who shot first. The men and women who beat down helpless people. Soldiers, officers, and military leaders. All of them were the same. His mama would be so disappointed that he lost his brothers just to rely on one of them.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Alex watched as Carlos moved closer to Nate. And he was trying to move away from him. Alex didn't think Nate would actually do anything but he wasn't so sure. He lost that smile he had, he didn't seem like the person Alex had taken a real liking too. Alex wanted to hide but he didn't have anything to hide in. So he took his tunic and covered himself with it in a pathetic excuse to hide.

Kaleb held that gaze with his own. "I don't know what happened to you or your family, but I was not like the others. I treated everyone fairly. I made sure my group did the same. Ask Carlos, I was the only one that treated the people like people." Kaleb answered. "So this large overarching stereotype you have, not all of us are like that." Kaleb finished. ​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

“I’m sure you were. Which is why you left them.” Abandoned these people who he treated like people to be treated like the filth that FEDRA seemed to think they were. Expendable someone once said. ‘They called us expendable.’

“Now, that’s not fair,” Carlos interjected. “You don’t know anything about how it was.”

“No?” Nate snapped. “Of course I wouldn’t. I’m just a terrorist.”

Carlos didn’t know what to make of that comment. What did that mean? Unsure, he looked back at Kaleb in the hopes that he would understand. There was something else at play here, and he didn’t like that he couldn’t see the hand. He wondered if Alex knew, but with the way he hid, this was not what he was used to either.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Kaleb sighed heavily. "I left them because they wouldn't come with me. I tried my hardest to get them to join me. To leave Denver. They wouldn't." Kaleb said. He heard Carlos interject and Kaleb held a hand up for him to stop. "You were a Firefly weren't you?" Kaleb said quietly. He had known it, deep down. "Look. I cannot change the past, but I left because I wanted to change my future" He said.

Alex listened to the back and forth, Nate's snapping comment and he just wanted to scream at him to knock it off. Kaleb left to be better, like Alex. If Alex had been FEDRA, would Nate have even given him a chance?​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Carlos looked from Kaleb to Nate. “Oh. Oh that’s what this is.” He nodded, no longer nearly as defensive as before. He practically sat back. “I always wanted to meet a Firefly. Heard they were the crazy people who bombed everyone. But you,” he whirled around until he was in Nate’s face. Kaleb couldn’t stop him if he was already there. “You don’t like hurting people. What did you do as a distraction? Something humane right? Something that would make them think we were up there but didn’t actually do any damage. I’ve seen the way you are. You don’t like conflict. In fact, I’m impressed that you have the courage to do this at all.” He backed up, sat back like they were still playing the game. “So really, I think you’re confused. You didn’t like that sort of your terrorists either did you?”

Nate blinked.

“Yeah, I didn’t think so. Well we didn’t like that about FEDRA either. Low down, good for nothing, joyless people. That’s why we left. Beautiful over here looked at his own organization that promoted him to fancy power man and left that behind.” He threw up his hands like in surrender or maybe a shrug. “Maybe you’re just like him. Maybe you’re just like us. Looking for something better. Something worthwhile.”

Nate couldn’t say anything. He looked from Carlos to Kaleb and then to Alex. His throat ran dry seeing him over there. So upset. So hurt. This was supposed to be a game to make him feel better, and he ruined it with his own prejudice and pride.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Kaleb blinked as Carlos intervened. He spoke the truth of course, but Kaleb really couldn’t stop him. Not when he was like that. Kaleb didn’t have much else he could say, Carlos had said it all. He had laid it out and it seemed to shut Nate down. “Okay. So let’s shelf this game for the time. We can try it another day if we so wish.” Kaleb suggested. He didn’t know what else to say, there wasn’t much else to say.

Alex had removed his tunic, looking between Carlos and Nate as they talked. He was still very much upset, hurt that this had happened. It was like he didn’t even know what to think. So he didn’t, he turned himself and looked away. Eyes focused on some random piece of wall instead of anyone in the room. He heard Kaleb and agreed. This game was the worst.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

“What’s that saying you guys used to say? Something about darkness?” Carlos leaned against Kaleb.

“When you’re lost in the darkness, look for the light.” Nate’s voice was weak, broken.

Carlos nodded. “Yeah yeah, that. Maybe you should think about that before you go judging other people for looking for the light too.”

Nate sat on the other side of the room than the other three. Alex turned away from him. It was worse this time than the last. Last time, Alex stayed with him. Guided him. Listened to the words that rattled through his brain like poison. A poison of his own design. They promised five feet. Five feet. Now there was more. It felt like miles. He could reach out his arms, and they may not ever be seen.

“Alex-“ “No.” Carlos didn’t let him finish, because they were all about done with this. “Leave him alone. Maybe he doesn’t want to be judged either.” He touched Kaleb’s shoulder. “I think our sleepover has reached its bedtime call. Should we call it and try to sleep off some of this… turmoil?”
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Kaleb felt Carlos lean against him as he talked. He heard how broken Nate's voice was. He hated that this had happened at all. Kaleb looked down as he felt Carlos touch his shoulder and he nodded. "I agree, it's time to get some sleep" He said. He had heard Nate try and talk to Alex, but Carlos quickly stopped that. Kaleb was ready to lay down, and so he did.

Alex could hear the brokenness in Nate's voice when Carlos brought up the saying that Nate had told him about. Alex felt tears brim under his eyes as he sat there. He was supposed to guide Nate, but right now he didn't know just what had happened to Nate. His head turned slightly when he heard Nate try and talk to him, but it didn't go any further as Carlos shut him down. Alex sighed heavily, agreeing that they should sleep, but he didn't want to sleep alone. He couldn't go to Nate, and so he looked over at Carlos and Kaleb, a silent plea in his eyes asking if he could lay beside one of them for the night.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

Carlos beckoned Alex over as one of them. Patted the space between him and Kaleb. This was not about flirty cuddles like Carlos might have made it earlier in the night. This was not about choosing sides. This was about making sure that Alex was okay, and he needed as many people as he could get. “We’ve got plenty of space over here. Comfy blankets and warm friends. It’s practically paradise.” He peered over at Nate who already laid back down with his blankets, staring up at the ceiling. This was just the surface of a much bigger problem, and Carlos wondered how far it would go before something really happened. Tomorrow he would ask a serious question. Ask where they were going. Washington. What was in Washington, and did he and Kaleb want to be there?

Nate stared at the ceiling trying not to think about it and failing miserably. Because of course it was all he could think about. He hadn’t slept alone since the first night he met Alex.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan and Kaleb Price
Former Seraphite, Former FEDRA officer | 19, 27 | Current location ;; Montana

Kaleb smiled over at Alex, as he stood up and made his way to lay down between the two of them. Kaleb laid so he was facing Alex with a smile. Right now it was about helping the scarred man. Making sure he was content and okay. Kaleb could see the watery eyes and sighed softly. Alex smiled at Kaleb, and at Carlos, appreciating them for allowing him to lay with them. "Thank you" He said softly, a yawn coming out. He wanted to have someone hold him but he didn't want to ask, it was a lot already just to be included at all. Alex had seen Nate curled up on his own, and his chest clenched painfully but he just needed to be somewhere else right now and that was laying in between Carlos and Kaleb.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews and Carlos Da Silva
Former Firefly, Aspiring Artist | 21, 25 | Current location ;; Montana

“You’re welcome, Handsome,” Carlos whispered, quiet so as to feel a little more sincere but also not to potentially create more tension then there was. He would have to see if there was a jealousy factor to this as well. It would make sense that perhaps there was a lot more than he could see for now. Carlos tossed a protective arm over him, rubbing Kaleb’s shoulder just to say hi before creating a nice and warm cuddle. He closed his eyes, willed his breathing to slow, and waited until Alex fell asleep before he allowed himself to.

Nate did not sleep. Period. He laid there, eyes wide shut as always. Always. But his mama always told him- his mama always- his mama. Was his mama wrong? Were all those people who escaped the QZs wrong? What about Alex? He left his group of horrible people who would persecute their own. Would he treat Alex so poorly if he came from FEDRA too. That thought hurt his heart. Heart him deep into his being. He would, wouldn’t he? Because everyone always told him that they were all the same. He hated that all those FEDRA officers talked about the Fireflies like every one of them were savage terrorists who wanted to blow everything up. Kill people. He hated that. And yet here he was, doing the same thing. He really was no better than they said. Were any of them?

What was he actually looking for?

So he did not sleep. He laid there for however long. Maybe minutes. Maybe hours. Until eventually he could not lay there any longer, and he walked the tiny room, to the door, feeling trapped. But who trapped who? He moved back to his blankets, and he sat silently. Thinking. Waiting.
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