qunqun
Give me your herbs, worm.
tw: sexual harassment mention, castration joke
SEPTEMBER 14TH.
A lesson in how to deal with people from one Aurelian Fiocchi.
When people ask if they can ask questions, you say no.
That’s it.
That’s the entire lesson.
If someone asks if they can do something, then the response can and should be an immediate and resolute “no.”
“Can we be friends?”
No.
“Can I steal some of your fries?”
Fuck off.
“Can I stick my dick in your mouth”
Absolutely fucking not he will rip that dick off with his teeth so help him God.
Anyways so his first impulse when asked “Can I ask you a question” was to go absolutely fucking not you will not ask me a question fuck off. In his general experience, that was a fucking trap just waiting to be sprung, do not ask him a question. Please shut the fuck up before you embarrass the both of them.
She did not wait for an answer, prompting Aurelian to question why the fuck she asked that in the first place:
“Do you regret it? Do you regret sleeping with me?”
Which was two questions, by the way. A comment which Aurelian very narrowly avoided making.
Also, side note, he wasn’t the nicest of people. And everyone knew that. He was a bit rough around the edges, had all this anger inside of him – a righteous fury that wanted to be let out at every single injustice in the world.
And he knew that his people skills left something to be desired.
But someone more skilled at people than him please answer this question:
How the FUCK are you supposed to respond to THAT SHIT.
Like, what was she expecting him to say “Yes you were the worst fuck of my entire life I hate you?” That would be BEYOND reasonable, and quite honestly he was annoyed with this entire line of questioning because it just begged for his compassion and pity.
And that was more fucking annoying than literally anything in his life, people fishing for that type of plastic sympathy. It wasn’t fucking real, it was a nice shiny gloss over issues which needed to be fucking addressed.
“....uh.” Unfortunately, he was not angry enough to actually state his thought process.
Light brown eyes seemed yellow as he looked directly into the sun, and then back at Carmen. They were the brown of whiskey – a gentle yellow ring at the very fringes of his iris serving the illusion that sometimes his eyes turned yellow when angry or particularly fervent in passion.
“Uhm.”
Exactly what a girl wanted to hear as an answer to “Do you regret sleeping with me.”
“Nawwwwwwwwwwhhhhh”
Because he was super nice like that
“You were great.”
Laying it on a bit thick there, Ari.
“It was… great.”
Okay she’s going to think you’re lying now. That was one too many greats.
The real answer was that he didn’t really… sex was… nice. And sex was… expected of him. He looked… how he did. And he didn’t mind showing off skin. And he had a dress sense that meant that at any moment he was generally showing off his physique. Or his ass.
And honestly, it wasn’t like he was repulsed by sex. And he definitely had a sex drive, but the thing was that he just… didn’t really view people like that. More specifically, he didn’t really view most of his partners like that.
People propositioned him, he accepted. They had a fun time. That was it.
Did married women fall into his bed? Probably. But that was her problem, and her husband’s problem. Not his.
Did a couple of guys here and there? Drunk hazy meetups behind the gym and general feelings of frustration and tension and a need to prove his superiority over the other and satisfied smiles beneath in the afterglow floated through his head if he really strained his memory, but being drunk and angry didn’t really count, now did it.
He didn’t really mind who it was. And while pleasure was nice, he was always on the abstinent side anyways, despite his appearance and his aesthetic.
At least he could fucking remember Carmen off hand. The lead up, the act, the aftermath.
And Carmen was… nice.
Carmen was a nice girl.
He should like Carmen.
If he was fucking smart, he’d like Carmen.
Carmen seemed to be the type of person that he should be respectably attracted to.
Nobody would ever look at Carmen and go “well that fucker has some weird tastes.”
He should be attracted to Carmen. He was attracted to Carmen.
Physically.
Probably.
When she was a bit more dignified.
… When she wasn’t snotting on his sleeve semi-pathetically.
But yeah.
Yeah. He wasn’t lying when he said that he didn’t regret sleeping with her.
That meant that this could work, right?
But also she was very very drunk, and maybe she should sober up a bit before she decided to actually properly ask him out.
“I’d like to see where this goes too.” He said voice mellowing out, softening considerably. “But you’re drunk right now, and I don’t take advantage of drunk girls.”
He stood, dusting sand off of his pants, holding out both of his hands to pull her up.
“C’mon. Alright. Upsie-daisy. There you go.” And he began to help her walk to his motorcycle. Red, and definitely built for speed. One helmet, though. He seemed to forgo it this time around.
“If you’re good, I’ll make a stop for ice cream.”
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Inexplicable
The Correspondents
♡coded by uxie♡
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