Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Ha, I dig your characters already. They sound devious and self-serving, love it.
TBD (Ampersand & GinjaGen)
- Thread starter GinjaGen
- Start date
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
Why thank you. I quite enjoy yours as well! I think they might get along.
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Yeah, I think we're off to a good start. I'm noticing that I'm writing very script-like; dialog heavy and light on description. Does it read well or should I be more descriptive with their actions and experiences (visuals, etc.)?
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
It's fine with me! I like your style. I hope mine isn't annoying to you!
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
No no, not at all! It's great! It'll be a blast when they meet. We'll have to figure out a fitting encounter!
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
Right! I'm sure we can think of something!
On another note, I'll write my response tomorrow morning!
On another note, I'll write my response tomorrow morning!
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Just got home; excited to read your post, but I'm exhausted. I'll get my next one up tomorrow as soon as I can, maybe afternoon sometime. (I'm currently on vacation, so the next few days may be hit or miss).
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
That's exciting! Take your time! Don't rush! I'm excited for your post, but I feel rushed posts aren't as good as calm posts, so, like I said, take your time!
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Thanks! Agreed on the rushed posts. I have some downtime to write this afternoon, will dig in shortly.
I love where it's going! I set it up so they meet in the desert--seemed best with Ayala and Kader (Adil?) heading out that way on a hover bike.
I was thinking the ship would crash land near them (or at least near enough for them to see it smoking and spitting across the sky). I'm tempted to make the crash serious enough to total the ship, which will setup a few things:
1) The ship is clearly dead, Quinn & Lodo rely on Ayala & Kader for rescue. They have a bargaining chip: the navigation chip from the lifeboat's computer that supposedly leads to the Borealis' last known location.
2) They can later all catch an intergalactic ferry or something bound towards their next destination: an expert on ancient Terran tech who can decode the navigation chip. I think this journey would be a much better environment for an encounter with enemies than a ship-to-ship space battle; punching and fighting in space cool, space battles in space cliche. Maybe it's a space casino cruise ship and goons follow them on board? Ha, something like that would far more interesting than being stuck in a tiny shuttlecraft and it really opens up the world.
I love where it's going! I set it up so they meet in the desert--seemed best with Ayala and Kader (Adil?) heading out that way on a hover bike.
I was thinking the ship would crash land near them (or at least near enough for them to see it smoking and spitting across the sky). I'm tempted to make the crash serious enough to total the ship, which will setup a few things:
1) The ship is clearly dead, Quinn & Lodo rely on Ayala & Kader for rescue. They have a bargaining chip: the navigation chip from the lifeboat's computer that supposedly leads to the Borealis' last known location.
2) They can later all catch an intergalactic ferry or something bound towards their next destination: an expert on ancient Terran tech who can decode the navigation chip. I think this journey would be a much better environment for an encounter with enemies than a ship-to-ship space battle; punching and fighting in space cool, space battles in space cliche. Maybe it's a space casino cruise ship and goons follow them on board? Ha, something like that would far more interesting than being stuck in a tiny shuttlecraft and it really opens up the world.
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GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
Haha, Whoops! I was going to name Kader "Adil" at one point... 
but then I decided two "A" names would be too confusing for me to write, and you to read! Apparently the name didn't want to die without a fight!
1) Awesome. Works for me. I was going to have them having taken something from their old boss that relates to the Borealis as well, maybe the ignition chip or something of that sort, but that's not necessarily necessary.
2) Definitely cooler to have a hand to hand battle in space!
but then I decided two "A" names would be too confusing for me to write, and you to read! Apparently the name didn't want to die without a fight!1) Awesome. Works for me. I was going to have them having taken something from their old boss that relates to the Borealis as well, maybe the ignition chip or something of that sort, but that's not necessarily necessary.
2) Definitely cooler to have a hand to hand battle in space!
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Sorry for the delay, this was my last day visiting family in the mid-west. I get back tomorrow an am excited to get our characters interacting with each other! By the way, how do you want to do that? Write shorter passages and let each other respond for our characters? Or is there another method you've used that worked well in the past?
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
No problem at all! I completely understand. Family is important!
I'm super excited as well, and have been thinking similar things. I have only ever really done it when we write shorter passages. If you would like to try something else, that works for me!
I'm super excited as well, and have been thinking similar things. I have only ever really done it when we write shorter passages. If you would like to try something else, that works for me!
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
I was thinking it through and since we seem to be on the ball with responses and we're both pretty active, I think shorter back and forth passages will work great. Just settling in, but I'll type something up this evening.
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
Awesome. If we don't like it we can always change anyway.
No pressure on the typing
No pressure on the typing
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
I'm actually super excited to write! Just have to knock out some work first.
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
Great, I look forward to reading it!
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Trying the short passage thing since there'll be a lot of character dialog coming up. I've never had a great way to deal with heavy dialog. When it's a line here or there, you can usually just wing it for the other character and edit it to their tastes later, but with a lot of back and forth it's tough.
We might be able to pre-plan the conversation beforehand...I'm open to ideas. It's definitely easier when all the writers are in the same room.
Btw, what race is Ayala? By the impression I got from the last passage, she's not human. Is there anything commonly known about her race that Quinn might be aware of?
----
As for the backstory of Earth, I'm trying to steer it away from Titan AE, but I still want humans to be sort of nomads. I wrote earlier that their planet is under control of an authoritarian government--the same gov that controls mostly everything; basically the Empire or maybe even more like the Combine from Half Life 2. I'd love to hear your ideas on ways to approach the whole "what happened to Earth, what is the current state of Earth/humanity" thing.
From there we can figure out what the climax of our story should be. Save earth? Defeat the bad guys? All the above? Or maybe we treat it more as a series and the climax is reaching the Borealis and uncovering its secret--a secret that's capable of saving humanity/earth.
We might be able to pre-plan the conversation beforehand...I'm open to ideas. It's definitely easier when all the writers are in the same room.
Btw, what race is Ayala? By the impression I got from the last passage, she's not human. Is there anything commonly known about her race that Quinn might be aware of?
----
As for the backstory of Earth, I'm trying to steer it away from Titan AE, but I still want humans to be sort of nomads. I wrote earlier that their planet is under control of an authoritarian government--the same gov that controls mostly everything; basically the Empire or maybe even more like the Combine from Half Life 2. I'd love to hear your ideas on ways to approach the whole "what happened to Earth, what is the current state of Earth/humanity" thing.
From there we can figure out what the climax of our story should be. Save earth? Defeat the bad guys? All the above? Or maybe we treat it more as a series and the climax is reaching the Borealis and uncovering its secret--a secret that's capable of saving humanity/earth.
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GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
Haha, Ayala is in fact (at least mostly) human. She's just so used to traveling with aliens of dissimilar anatomy that she didn't want to assume that Quinn would have (generally) the same anatomy to hers. You never know where a strange person's pulse is gonna be!
And as for the conversations, I agree. It's a dance to not over step your control, but still trying to continue the narrative.
My plan for this conversation was basically for them to all learn just a bit about each other, then Kader and Ayala to basically say they were leaving, and good luck to Quinn and Lodo. They would then barter.
_____
Here's a possibility: What if when the government took over, they not only took over to lead, they took over to have the planet, like in the movies when the aliens come to invade for resources and more living space except that in this case the aliens won, and sort of let the humans stay but for the most part had killed them off or chased them into space. The humans left, especially those on the planet that was once their home, are treated like dirt by most races, except those that the government has also messed with.
If we use some of the ideas from my idea, we could have it that the Borealis contains/is something that could help the humans/other aliens' homes taken by the government get their planets back, or topple the government... something like that?
However, I think meeting that goal isn't particularly climactic, (at least until the very end when they have support and such so they can make an assault on the government, or trick the guy in charge and subterfuge their way into over throwing it. Before that we have to find the Borealis, take care of the guys chasing Ayala and Kader, I assume take care of the guys messing with Quinn and Lodo (they might be the same general guys as Ayala and Kader), and have the characters come to know each other... not in that order.
What do you think?
______
Can I just say as well that this is quite possibly my favorite RP. If this were a book/movie, I would read/watch it...
Also, as usual I appreciate your references!
And as for the conversations, I agree. It's a dance to not over step your control, but still trying to continue the narrative.
My plan for this conversation was basically for them to all learn just a bit about each other, then Kader and Ayala to basically say they were leaving, and good luck to Quinn and Lodo. They would then barter.
_____
Here's a possibility: What if when the government took over, they not only took over to lead, they took over to have the planet, like in the movies when the aliens come to invade for resources and more living space except that in this case the aliens won, and sort of let the humans stay but for the most part had killed them off or chased them into space. The humans left, especially those on the planet that was once their home, are treated like dirt by most races, except those that the government has also messed with.
If we use some of the ideas from my idea, we could have it that the Borealis contains/is something that could help the humans/other aliens' homes taken by the government get their planets back, or topple the government... something like that?
However, I think meeting that goal isn't particularly climactic, (at least until the very end when they have support and such so they can make an assault on the government, or trick the guy in charge and subterfuge their way into over throwing it. Before that we have to find the Borealis, take care of the guys chasing Ayala and Kader, I assume take care of the guys messing with Quinn and Lodo (they might be the same general guys as Ayala and Kader), and have the characters come to know each other... not in that order.
What do you think?
______
Can I just say as well that this is quite possibly my favorite RP. If this were a book/movie, I would read/watch it...
Also, as usual I appreciate your references!
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Oh, fantastic! I was hoping she'd be human or self-identify as human so saving the human race had value for both of them.
Sounds like about what I had in mind for the conversation. I planned for Quinn to have the chip stashed on Lodo, "...in a pocket, or a robot," but since Ayala and Kader could take it by force anyway I think we have a better setup for them to ask what it is that they looted from his pocket. Quinn will have to make a knowledge bargain, perhaps knowing a guy who can decode the chip.
----
That's perfect, exactly what I was thinking with the Combine idea. Aliens come for the resources, some humans fight, some escape, most are enslaved and live in a Half Life-esque authoritarian state; picture a Hunger Games way of life, people living in crumbling buildings and ramshackle homes, going into the factories or mines each day, some people are taken away and never seen again. The underground resistance lives between the cities, but most people live within one of the twenty some-odd megacities that remain on earth, each with a massive enemy spire-structure where dark shenanigans take place, such as the conversion of humans to controlled drones.
Something like that should be enough to build the image of Earth out of what is known about its fate from hearsay. This same enemy/government is a threat to the known galaxy and slowly expanding its territory, almost machine like, *hint* *hint*. But the galaxy is a big place and people as far out as The Fringe rarely worry about the problems affecting The Galactic Counsel and its inner empires, especially since most have more immediate concerns, like getting their next meal.
----
The saving the galaxy thing is so far off that I'm treating it like a later book in the series, planting seeds to carry threads into the later books while being mainly focused on the plot at hand. We're on the first story-arc, Var'sarr, the desert world. The climax of the arc is probably going to be defeating or escaping from whoever has it in for Ayala and Quill. It'd tie things together nicely if that person/entity/crime syndicate/mafia was the guy causing trouble for both of them. I'm leaning towards epic escape and then if we do the casino cruise idea, that's where we run into goons, bounty hunters, and/or secret Galactic Counsel agents (who could be good guys there to help).
---
I love this RP so far!
Thinking next plot steps. We make it back to Oasis, eventually some goons recognize and approach Quinn for the money he owes da boss...and then, "Hey isn't dat the girl and her pet monkey we was told to capture?" "As a matt'ah of fact, dems do look familiar." *pounds fists* "Looks like today is aww lucky day, eh Charlie?"
...things devolve from there. Maybe they end up being captured after a nice street brawl + chase and go to see Da Boss. Whaddya think?
Sounds like about what I had in mind for the conversation. I planned for Quinn to have the chip stashed on Lodo, "...in a pocket, or a robot," but since Ayala and Kader could take it by force anyway I think we have a better setup for them to ask what it is that they looted from his pocket. Quinn will have to make a knowledge bargain, perhaps knowing a guy who can decode the chip.
----
That's perfect, exactly what I was thinking with the Combine idea. Aliens come for the resources, some humans fight, some escape, most are enslaved and live in a Half Life-esque authoritarian state; picture a Hunger Games way of life, people living in crumbling buildings and ramshackle homes, going into the factories or mines each day, some people are taken away and never seen again. The underground resistance lives between the cities, but most people live within one of the twenty some-odd megacities that remain on earth, each with a massive enemy spire-structure where dark shenanigans take place, such as the conversion of humans to controlled drones.
Something like that should be enough to build the image of Earth out of what is known about its fate from hearsay. This same enemy/government is a threat to the known galaxy and slowly expanding its territory, almost machine like, *hint* *hint*. But the galaxy is a big place and people as far out as The Fringe rarely worry about the problems affecting The Galactic Counsel and its inner empires, especially since most have more immediate concerns, like getting their next meal.
----
The saving the galaxy thing is so far off that I'm treating it like a later book in the series, planting seeds to carry threads into the later books while being mainly focused on the plot at hand. We're on the first story-arc, Var'sarr, the desert world. The climax of the arc is probably going to be defeating or escaping from whoever has it in for Ayala and Quill. It'd tie things together nicely if that person/entity/crime syndicate/mafia was the guy causing trouble for both of them. I'm leaning towards epic escape and then if we do the casino cruise idea, that's where we run into goons, bounty hunters, and/or secret Galactic Counsel agents (who could be good guys there to help).
---
I love this RP so far!
Thinking next plot steps. We make it back to Oasis, eventually some goons recognize and approach Quinn for the money he owes da boss...and then, "Hey isn't dat the girl and her pet monkey we was told to capture?" "As a matt'ah of fact, dems do look familiar." *pounds fists* "Looks like today is aww lucky day, eh Charlie?"
...things devolve from there. Maybe they end up being captured after a nice street brawl + chase and go to see Da Boss. Whaddya think?
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
That all sounds great! What should we name the boss? I've been skirting around his name, and we don't need it right away, but I was thinking it might be a good thing to have on hand.
Also, I'll post my response in a few minutes to start up our dialogue!
"dark shenanigans"
Also, I'll post my response in a few minutes to start up our dialogue!
"dark shenanigans"
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
haha, yes, dark shenanigans and sinister tomfoolery abound!
We should definitely name the boss. He's known simply as "Duncan", his true name unknown, a Dodarian (turtle-like reptilian humanoid, known for their smarts and strategic thinking, but not their strength--they're about 5' tall) who has more control over Var'sarr than the local government. He's the leader and brain of the operation and a shrewd businessman. He basically owns Var'sarr and nothing big or small happens without him knowing about it. Duncan is very Al Capone; he's a public figure, the common people approve of him, he funds the local games arena and public works, but he's ruthless to those who cross or fail him.
His number 1 and personal bodyguard is "Vrath the Wrath", a Sarkakrian (Krogan-like warrior race, one of the ten or so main races populating the galaxy, Klingon inspired, Sarkakrian adults tower over most other races, averaging 7 feet tall.) who made his way to the top by killing any adversary who got in his way. He hates his nickname "the Wrath" and kills anyone who refers to him as such. Vrath is dead loyal to Duncan.
Just an afterthought. I've been referring to things as "Sarkak food" and then calling them Sarkakrians. Let's say Sarkak and Sarkakrian are interchangeable, the former informal usage, like America vs United States of America.
We should definitely name the boss. He's known simply as "Duncan", his true name unknown, a Dodarian (turtle-like reptilian humanoid, known for their smarts and strategic thinking, but not their strength--they're about 5' tall) who has more control over Var'sarr than the local government. He's the leader and brain of the operation and a shrewd businessman. He basically owns Var'sarr and nothing big or small happens without him knowing about it. Duncan is very Al Capone; he's a public figure, the common people approve of him, he funds the local games arena and public works, but he's ruthless to those who cross or fail him.
His number 1 and personal bodyguard is "Vrath the Wrath", a Sarkakrian (Krogan-like warrior race, one of the ten or so main races populating the galaxy, Klingon inspired, Sarkakrian adults tower over most other races, averaging 7 feet tall.) who made his way to the top by killing any adversary who got in his way. He hates his nickname "the Wrath" and kills anyone who refers to him as such. Vrath is dead loyal to Duncan.
Just an afterthought. I've been referring to things as "Sarkak food" and then calling them Sarkakrians. Let's say Sarkak and Sarkakrian are interchangeable, the former informal usage, like America vs United States of America.
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GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
Love it. There's even the beautiful irony of him having a human-esque name in a human-hating-ish universe!
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Since it will definitely come up, I'm going to say that The Alliance (the entity consisting of a hundred races, governed by the Galactic Counsel) considers bounty hunting and vigilantism illegal, but it's still fairly prevalent, especially in The Fringe and other outer sectors since it's its difficult to regulate and Alliance enforcement is spread thin out there.
Oh man, my posts are getting shorter and shorter. It's tough getting a lot of dialog going with Lodo out of action at the moment. I think a repair shop of sorts might be our next stop.
Oh man, my posts are getting shorter and shorter. It's tough getting a lot of dialog going with Lodo out of action at the moment. I think a repair shop of sorts might be our next stop.
GinjaGen
Not-so-Sneaky Ninja
Haha, if I didn't have both of my characters I'm sure my posts would be just as short!
Also, how old is Quinn? Just so I have a sense, and can interact with him accordingly.
Also, how old is Quinn? Just so I have a sense, and can interact with him accordingly.
Ampersand
I ♥ semicolons
Quinn is about 30 years old. He's a younger Han Solo, Malcolm Reynolds, Peter Quill type; perpetual 5 'o clock shadow, adventurer, troublemaker, chaotic good anti hero turned hero (though, we haven't seen the change yet, that'll come as we go).
I've been thinking about it and I might end up making him more of a tinkerer/engineer with some pretty extensive knowledge on the ins and outs of electronics and engineering. I had originally written part of a passage containing his past where he was repairing a ship part working in his father's shop, but then it started to get all Anakin and it totally grossed me out. But I still want to differentiate him from the standard adventure good-looker Han Solo character. I've been writing him a little more careless & goofy, but I want that overconfidence to come from actual know-how, not just his gut feeling like the others do.
And I just shaved off 5 years from his age. He's 30. Can't have him be too experienced in space adventure funsies. I want him to wing it and fail; maybe he has the knowledge, but not necessarily the experience to shoot by the hip and have it always succeed. But when he succeeds, more than often I want it to be because he was right, not just lucky. (Where I feel Han Solo is saved by luck).
I've been thinking about it and I might end up making him more of a tinkerer/engineer with some pretty extensive knowledge on the ins and outs of electronics and engineering. I had originally written part of a passage containing his past where he was repairing a ship part working in his father's shop, but then it started to get all Anakin and it totally grossed me out. But I still want to differentiate him from the standard adventure good-looker Han Solo character. I've been writing him a little more careless & goofy, but I want that overconfidence to come from actual know-how, not just his gut feeling like the others do.
And I just shaved off 5 years from his age. He's 30. Can't have him be too experienced in space adventure funsies. I want him to wing it and fail; maybe he has the knowledge, but not necessarily the experience to shoot by the hip and have it always succeed. But when he succeeds, more than often I want it to be because he was right, not just lucky. (Where I feel Han Solo is saved by luck).
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