Sen Pai
I'm back, baby.
If anyone's curious about The Secret Service: http://rpnation.com/index.php?threads/the-secret-service-restart-of-monster-and-me-wip.14948/ Just going to put that there....
Tales of Salisonia: Rise of the Dragons [Official OOC Thread]
- Thread starter Sen Pai
- Start date
evephy
unhealthy koreaboo
MrLlama said:
Oh wow, I didn't even see that. o-o;;
*ghetto mode ACTIVATED
Excuse me? I KNOW you did not just touch me. I KNOW, you did NOT just touch me.
uh-uh, girlfrand. Nawt cool.
*begins to take off the variety of different bangles on my wrist.
Llama! Take mah bling.
You know, yo weave. Is SO ratchet, it's made from yo mama's sweater! >
I hope that amount of vulgar language was okay. >>;;
Sen Pai
I'm back, baby.
*watches intently* Not as good as an actual argument, but it'll have to do.TheInfamousHavoc said:
Oh wow, I didn't even see that. o-o;;
*ghetto mode ACTIVATED
Excuse me? I KNOW you did not just touch me. I KNOW, you did NOT just touch me.
uh-uh, girlfrand. Nawt cool.
*begins to take off the variety of different bangles on my wrist.
Llama! Take mah bling.
You know, yo weave. Is SO ratchet, it's made from yo mama's sweater! >
MrLlama
As Straight As A Rainbow
I nearly left because I thought it was only going to be a Roleplay of the Bible. xDpaipai900 said:
evephy
unhealthy koreaboo
Ixidor92
Game master
Um . . . did you read the thread recently? I posted up there earlier tonight. The answer to your question is there.MrLlama said:
Lucem
Ten Thousand Club
[QUOTE="Wynn Kamui]Appearance: (See Avatar)
Name: Wynn Kamui
Gender: Female
Age: 16
Race: Human
Class: Mage (Weak and untrained in the element of Wind due to lack of Knowledge about element)
Appearance Notes: 5ft 2in, 120lbs
Personality: Wynn is a very analytical person. She can quickly analyze a foe and adapt to them accordingly. Wynn is also a very peaceful, and tries to avoid violent conflict. Despite being a very logical person, Wynn is very adventurous. She decided early on in teaching herself how to control the element of wind that she needed to explore and analyze the effects of wind that many people overlook and give no importance to.
History: Wynn's mother died during Wynn's birth, so she was raised by her father. Wynn's father was an engineer, and he designed some gliding machines that he took Wynn on. He told her that some day she would be able to fly like him. When Wynn was left as the sole survivor of a raid on her hometown at the age of 7, she promised herself that she would follow in her father's footsteps and fly. She built many different gliders from the scraps that she could gather, but none of them could sustain flight because the wind always changed direction. That's when she realized that she would have to control the wind to keep her promise.
[/QUOTE]
She sounds like a good character, but more detail would be good. For example, what flaws does she have in her personality and what more is there to her. Also, the history could use a good bit of detail as well.
One of the biggest things I'm concerned about is the wind magic. Since it is something new you have brought in, it wi require a great deal of detail. Thins like strengths, weaknesses, and capabilities are essential for this. This way we can be sure that the magic is not OP and that new abilities can't be continuously added.
Name: Wynn Kamui
Gender: Female
Age: 16
Race: Human
Class: Mage (Weak and untrained in the element of Wind due to lack of Knowledge about element)
Appearance Notes: 5ft 2in, 120lbs
Personality: Wynn is a very analytical person. She can quickly analyze a foe and adapt to them accordingly. Wynn is also a very peaceful, and tries to avoid violent conflict. Despite being a very logical person, Wynn is very adventurous. She decided early on in teaching herself how to control the element of wind that she needed to explore and analyze the effects of wind that many people overlook and give no importance to.
History: Wynn's mother died during Wynn's birth, so she was raised by her father. Wynn's father was an engineer, and he designed some gliding machines that he took Wynn on. He told her that some day she would be able to fly like him. When Wynn was left as the sole survivor of a raid on her hometown at the age of 7, she promised herself that she would follow in her father's footsteps and fly. She built many different gliders from the scraps that she could gather, but none of them could sustain flight because the wind always changed direction. That's when she realized that she would have to control the wind to keep her promise.
[/QUOTE]
She sounds like a good character, but more detail would be good. For example, what flaws does she have in her personality and what more is there to her. Also, the history could use a good bit of detail as well.
One of the biggest things I'm concerned about is the wind magic. Since it is something new you have brought in, it wi require a great deal of detail. Thins like strengths, weaknesses, and capabilities are essential for this. This way we can be sure that the magic is not OP and that new abilities can't be continuously added.
Sen Pai
I'm back, baby.
Well, I used the Bible because the enemy is Satan. :3 if you read the original roleplay, it wasn't even close to being based on the Bible. Hahaha!MrLlama said:
MrLlama
As Straight As A Rainbow
OH, SO THAT'S HOW IT IS, HM?! WE IS GOING NOW, GIRL, FOR SURE. IMMA TAKE YO FRIED CHICKEN, YO WATER MELON, ERRTHING YOU OWN, EVEN THEM BIKES. YOU IS LOSING IT ALL. I WILL COMMAND YOUR ENTIRE. RATCHET. LIFE. YO FRICKEN LEGS LOOK LIKE CHEWBACCA'S DONKEY WITH THEM NASTY HAIRS AND YALLS GOT A MOUSTACHE GROWING ON YO MOUSTACHE.TheInfamousHavoc said:
Oh wow, I didn't even see that. o-o;;
*ghetto mode ACTIVATED
Excuse me? I KNOW you did not just touch me. I KNOW, you did NOT just touch me.
uh-uh, girlfrand. Nawt cool.
*begins to take off the variety of different bangles on my wrist.
Llama! Take mah bling.
You know, yo weave. Is SO ratchet, it's made from yo mama's sweater! >
I hope that amount of vulgar language was okay. >>;;
((I can't tell if this just make me racist or full-on steryeoeoeoeorotype ghetto. Either way, I'm too lazy to come up with anything good. Skyrim hmnngngggg))
Sen Pai
I'm back, baby.
[QUOTE="Lucem Tenebris]She sounds like a good character, but more detail would be good. For example, what flaws does she have in her personality and what more is there to her. Also, the history could use a good bit of detail as well.
One of the biggest things I'm concerned about is the wind magic. Since it is something new you have brought in, it wi require a great deal of detail. Thins like strengths, weaknesses, and capabilities are essential for this. This way we can be sure that the magic is not OP and that new abilities can't be continuously added.
[/QUOTE]
Btw if she uses wind magic, she's an elementalist.
One of the biggest things I'm concerned about is the wind magic. Since it is something new you have brought in, it wi require a great deal of detail. Thins like strengths, weaknesses, and capabilities are essential for this. This way we can be sure that the magic is not OP and that new abilities can't be continuously added.
[/QUOTE]
Btw if she uses wind magic, she's an elementalist.
Wynn Kamui
Junior Member
I resort to petty stereotypical claims about your physical characteristics.TheInfamousHavoc said:
Sen Pai
I'm back, baby.
YUM. CHICKEN. BITCH.MrLlama said:
Wynn Kamui
Junior Member
[QUOTE="Lucem Tenebris]She sounds like a good character, but more detail would be good. For example, what flaws does she have in her personality and what more is there to her. Also, the history could use a good bit of detail as well.One of the biggest things I'm concerned about is the wind magic. Since it is something new you have brought in, it wi require a great deal of detail. Thins like strengths, weaknesses, and capabilities are essential for this. This way we can be sure that the magic is not OP and that new abilities can't be continuously added.
[/QUOTE]
Will do. Hope you're gonna be here for a while, typing on a Wiiu controller can be a bit tedious :3
[/QUOTE]
Will do. Hope you're gonna be here for a while, typing on a Wiiu controller can be a bit tedious :3
Lucem
Ten Thousand Club
Ah, I misread what she put down as her class. Yes, she would be an Elementalist, rather than a Mage.paipai900 said:
[QUOTE="Wynn Kamui]Will do. Hope you're gonna be here for a while, typing on a Wiiu controller can be a bit tedious :3
[/QUOTE]
I'll try, but I can't make any guarantees. It's 1:00 A.M. and I have school tomorrow today.
MrLlama
As Straight As A Rainbow
Oh lawdy. I forgot I had just killed a giant spider, which had it's face taking up my screen. I was busy choosing a tree to put points into and forgot about it, so when I unpaused the game I saw it and jumped so haaard.
evephy
unhealthy koreaboo
@MrLlama
All caps now, hm? It's ON.
OH, YOU BETTA NAWT TUCH MAH FRIED CHICKEN. AND DO NAWT EVEN GET STARTED ON THE WATER MELONE.
YOU TOUCH IT, AND I WILL RIP THAT RATCHET ASS(donkey) WEAVE OFF YO HEAD AND THROW IT AT BONQUISHA DOWN THE STREET. YOU JUST JELOUS BECAUSE YO WEAVE AIN'T AS GOOD AS MINE, YOU HOE (gardening tool).
AND I AM NOT HAIRY. COMIN' FROM THIS GURL OVA HERE. YOU LOOK LIKE WHAT WOULD COME OUT IF CHEWBACCA AND BIG FOOT HAD A BABY. DON'T EVEN TRAI TO COME UP IN MAH HOOD TALKIN' BOUT MAH FRIED CHICKEN LYKE DAT.
@Wynn Kamui
And I shall question your intelligence, insulting you in the process. >:3
All caps now, hm? It's ON.
OH, YOU BETTA NAWT TUCH MAH FRIED CHICKEN. AND DO NAWT EVEN GET STARTED ON THE WATER MELONE.
YOU TOUCH IT, AND I WILL RIP THAT RATCHET ASS(donkey) WEAVE OFF YO HEAD AND THROW IT AT BONQUISHA DOWN THE STREET. YOU JUST JELOUS BECAUSE YO WEAVE AIN'T AS GOOD AS MINE, YOU HOE (gardening tool).
AND I AM NOT HAIRY. COMIN' FROM THIS GURL OVA HERE. YOU LOOK LIKE WHAT WOULD COME OUT IF CHEWBACCA AND BIG FOOT HAD A BABY. DON'T EVEN TRAI TO COME UP IN MAH HOOD TALKIN' BOUT MAH FRIED CHICKEN LYKE DAT.
@Wynn Kamui
And I shall question your intelligence, insulting you in the process. >:3
Last edited by a moderator:
MrLlama
As Straight As A Rainbow
i ded
Croissant
Piggu Lord
[QUOTE="Wynn Kamui]Appearance: (See Avatar)
Name: Wynn Kamui
Gender: Female
Age: 16
Race: Human
Class: Mage (Weak and untrained in the element of Wind due to lack of Knowledge about element)
Appearance Notes: 5ft 2in, 120lbs
Personality: Wynn is a very analytical person. She can quickly analyze a foe and adapt to them accordingly. Wynn is also a very peaceful, and tries to avoid violent conflict. Despite being a very logical person, Wynn is very adventurous. She decided early on in teaching herself how to control the element of wind that she needed to explore and analyze the effects of wind that many people overlook and give no importance to.
History: Wynn's mother died during Wynn's birth, so she was raised by her father. Wynn's father was an engineer, and he designed some gliding machines that he took Wynn on. He told her that some day she would be able to fly like him. When Wynn was left as the sole survivor of a raid on her hometown at the age of 7, she promised herself that she would follow in her father's footsteps and fly. She built many different gliders from the scraps that she could gather, but none of them could sustain flight because the wind always changed direction. That's when she realized that she would have to control the wind to keep her promise.
[/QUOTE]
Okay so let's go by sections
Name: Wynn Kamui is kinda an outlandish name for a Salisonian makes them sound foreign but I can't say anything, I've seen more outlandish names so it's fine.
Gender: Hmm, one problem. I don't see her in the kitchen RAINBOWS RAINBOWS
Age: 16? Yay same age as my characters #youngfolyfe
Race: Human...Such an odd race. But I ain't racist So :3
Class: Can you switch it to Wind Elementalist, we'll get to more into that later into the review
Appearance: Can you make this at least a paragraph or have a few more bullets really, all I'm asking is for common stuff like hair color, eye color, Scars? body shape? etc. And I have nothing against 5'2 120lbs
Personality: Well you did make your character have a pretty straight forward and well explained personality it lacks examples and details to prove that she is like this, it can be hard but try to make it longer, read what other people have done that have long apps and try checking what yours is missing
History: NEEDS WAAAYYYY MORE DETAIL. Like this history is much too vague, it requires to be much longer, I mean what was her fathers name, how did he invent gliders? Salisonia is a very medieval and fantasy process type RP aside from dwarfs which are slightly steampunk but you would have to ask @paipai900 unless they're like, gliders with cloth and sticks like hang gliders. But it does say gliding machines so, can't let that slide. ALSO was he an independent engineer or did he work for someone? How could a 7 year old be sophisticated enough to survive a raid and survive alone as well? Kinda Sue-ish there. If there was a Raid wouldn't her father's work be stolen and she wouldn't have much of a way to learn? or did her father teach her? The fact she could even build these things at such a young age or at least TRY to build and comprehend shows slight signs. Again she knew she had to learn how to control the wind? Okay but where would she learn that? She's 7 years old in a ruined town and is the lone survivor? How would she know where to go? what to pack? What to eat? As well as how did she even survive those types of circumstances without crying and dehydrating herself. Lemme just keep a promise my dad gave me when I was seven and start flying. See where I'm going here? It's kinda illogical. If she was older it would make SOME sense. Where did she go next? This described about a fragment of her life truly.
Overall Review: The Concept of the character is good but it needs a lot of work due to how many holes there are in it, I just gave you a slightly deep review so you could start working because I need sleep. But if you need help with the creations I would be more than glad to help. So would @paipai900 and @Lucem Tenebris But the idea is good it just needs some work and try to make your entries longer please
but I have a feeling this will turn out well.
Since I dance I stretch a lot so. JAH results come fast if you're determined. That means trying to do splits too.
Name: Wynn Kamui
Gender: Female
Age: 16
Race: Human
Class: Mage (Weak and untrained in the element of Wind due to lack of Knowledge about element)
Appearance Notes: 5ft 2in, 120lbs
Personality: Wynn is a very analytical person. She can quickly analyze a foe and adapt to them accordingly. Wynn is also a very peaceful, and tries to avoid violent conflict. Despite being a very logical person, Wynn is very adventurous. She decided early on in teaching herself how to control the element of wind that she needed to explore and analyze the effects of wind that many people overlook and give no importance to.
History: Wynn's mother died during Wynn's birth, so she was raised by her father. Wynn's father was an engineer, and he designed some gliding machines that he took Wynn on. He told her that some day she would be able to fly like him. When Wynn was left as the sole survivor of a raid on her hometown at the age of 7, she promised herself that she would follow in her father's footsteps and fly. She built many different gliders from the scraps that she could gather, but none of them could sustain flight because the wind always changed direction. That's when she realized that she would have to control the wind to keep her promise.
[/QUOTE]
Okay so let's go by sections
Name: Wynn Kamui is kinda an outlandish name for a Salisonian makes them sound foreign but I can't say anything, I've seen more outlandish names so it's fine.
Gender: Hmm, one problem. I don't see her in the kitchen RAINBOWS RAINBOWS
Age: 16? Yay same age as my characters #youngfolyfe
Race: Human...Such an odd race. But I ain't racist So :3
Class: Can you switch it to Wind Elementalist, we'll get to more into that later into the review
Appearance: Can you make this at least a paragraph or have a few more bullets really, all I'm asking is for common stuff like hair color, eye color, Scars? body shape? etc. And I have nothing against 5'2 120lbs
Personality: Well you did make your character have a pretty straight forward and well explained personality it lacks examples and details to prove that she is like this, it can be hard but try to make it longer, read what other people have done that have long apps and try checking what yours is missing
History: NEEDS WAAAYYYY MORE DETAIL. Like this history is much too vague, it requires to be much longer, I mean what was her fathers name, how did he invent gliders? Salisonia is a very medieval and fantasy process type RP aside from dwarfs which are slightly steampunk but you would have to ask @paipai900 unless they're like, gliders with cloth and sticks like hang gliders. But it does say gliding machines so, can't let that slide. ALSO was he an independent engineer or did he work for someone? How could a 7 year old be sophisticated enough to survive a raid and survive alone as well? Kinda Sue-ish there. If there was a Raid wouldn't her father's work be stolen and she wouldn't have much of a way to learn? or did her father teach her? The fact she could even build these things at such a young age or at least TRY to build and comprehend shows slight signs. Again she knew she had to learn how to control the wind? Okay but where would she learn that? She's 7 years old in a ruined town and is the lone survivor? How would she know where to go? what to pack? What to eat? As well as how did she even survive those types of circumstances without crying and dehydrating herself. Lemme just keep a promise my dad gave me when I was seven and start flying. See where I'm going here? It's kinda illogical. If she was older it would make SOME sense. Where did she go next? This described about a fragment of her life truly.
Overall Review: The Concept of the character is good but it needs a lot of work due to how many holes there are in it, I just gave you a slightly deep review so you could start working because I need sleep. But if you need help with the creations I would be more than glad to help. So would @paipai900 and @Lucem Tenebris But the idea is good it just needs some work and try to make your entries longer please
but I have a feeling this will turn out well. Doing stretches before bed and throughout the day works, and DRINK YOUR MILK. *Fullmetal Alchemist refrence and real life tip*'paipai900 said:Okay, everyone. I made a goal for mysel to sleep earlier. I NEED TO GROW TALLER!! >*determined mode activated*
Actually, I'll work on The Secret Service.
Since I dance I stretch a lot so. JAH results come fast if you're determined. That means trying to do splits too.
Lucem
Ten Thousand Club
I sure hope that was a mistag somehow...TheInfamousHavoc said:
Croissant
Piggu Lord
I feel like I'm the only colored person in here. Cuz
I are the Nigest
(this isn't racist, it's true I'm probably the darkest amongst the white frolock, and Pai, but this is just an assumption don't get mad guise ;-
I are the Nigest
(this isn't racist, it's true I'm probably the darkest amongst the white frolock, and Pai, but this is just an assumption don't get mad guise ;-
evephy
unhealthy koreaboo
@Lucem Tenebris
Oh god. xD
Yes it was. MAI BAD.
I was just too captivated by Lucem's beutiful name. Pfft.
I'm just gonna... change that. xD
I can't. That was just too good. xDD
I'm a girl, but I mean, come on. PERFECT TIMING
Oh god. xD
Yes it was. MAI BAD.
I was just too captivated by Lucem's beutiful name. Pfft.
I'm just gonna... change that. xD
Cressy said:
I can't. That was just too good. xDD
I'm a girl, but I mean, come on. PERFECT TIMING
Sen Pai
I'm back, baby.
Drinks truck loads of milk, but I will grow taller. EVEN IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO!!
Croissant
Piggu Lord
LUCY WHEN YOU DOING THAT RP WITH IRL, I'M BUSTING OUT MY LIFE'S STORY! AND MY REALLY COOL NAME
*THEME SONG*
STARTED FROM THE BOTTOM- SHUT UP NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR SOB STORY!
*THEME SONG*
STARTED FROM THE BOTTOM- SHUT UP NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR SOB STORY!
Lucem
Ten Thousand Club
I'm darker than neon, so I feel accomplished.
