SmallSailboat
The one they warned you about
Lance was ripped from his thoughts as Akira slammed the door. He never thought he'd feel fear from a man that much smaller than him, but it shook him to see him so angry. By time he processed what Akira was saying, Akira was already mocking him. Lance's own feelings boiled over, he was so upset he almost attempted to speak. His emotions spilled out of his fingers in the worst way possible: defensiveness.
"I don't recall asking for your forgiveness! I am damn well aware I don't deserve it! You don't have to fucking tell me about how much of a coward I am, how weak I am when it comes to you! How utterly human I am when it comes to the two of you! I didn't ask you to give anything up for me, I didn't ask to fall for you, I didn't ask for anyone to fall for me, I didn't ask for any of this to happen! I didn't go into this with any sort of expectations! You had time to deal with your feelings, you both did! Clearly you not only had time to figure them out, but also figure out how to tell me about it! I didn't! I still haven't! I've never felt anything like this before! I'm scared and confused and bound to fuck this up because I got thrown into this having no idea what I'm doing, or even what's fully going on half the time, I can barely even react, let alone process any of it! I don't know what the hell it is I want you to do because I can't get five fucking minutes to figure it out! You know, maybe some time to say, 'Hm what should I do about this?' That would have been a real fucking treat! The only thing I've had time to figure out is how I feel about the two of you but that's because it's the only time where I had all the information I needed! Because how I feel about the two of you isn't dependent on information about anyone else other than myself! But no, you asked me out on the day I met you, and I've had to make this decision having known both of you for less than a week! Of course this decision was going to be bad and half-assed, what the hell were you expecting-" His fingers stopped as his head snapped towards Darron's appearance. The only reason he had heard him was because Lance couldn't actually speak. He'd permit himself to feel relief that Danny had made up with him later, but right now there were too many other feelings in the way. They were right, Lance had given up because he had assumed Akira would give up on him. Anyone else he'd ever known had done exactly that, why would he expect something different of Akira? Because Akira loved him. He didn't even think about the possibility that Akira would have wanted to forgive him, even if he couldn't. He knew Danny wouldn't want this, he knew none of them wanted to separate. Even if he didn't like how Akira had phrased it, he couldn't pretend he wasn't at least half right. He closed his eyes and took some deep breaths before signing to Darron, "I hate it when you're right, just so we're clear on that."
K KodomoSekai Elizabeth Ashreel
"I don't recall asking for your forgiveness! I am damn well aware I don't deserve it! You don't have to fucking tell me about how much of a coward I am, how weak I am when it comes to you! How utterly human I am when it comes to the two of you! I didn't ask you to give anything up for me, I didn't ask to fall for you, I didn't ask for anyone to fall for me, I didn't ask for any of this to happen! I didn't go into this with any sort of expectations! You had time to deal with your feelings, you both did! Clearly you not only had time to figure them out, but also figure out how to tell me about it! I didn't! I still haven't! I've never felt anything like this before! I'm scared and confused and bound to fuck this up because I got thrown into this having no idea what I'm doing, or even what's fully going on half the time, I can barely even react, let alone process any of it! I don't know what the hell it is I want you to do because I can't get five fucking minutes to figure it out! You know, maybe some time to say, 'Hm what should I do about this?' That would have been a real fucking treat! The only thing I've had time to figure out is how I feel about the two of you but that's because it's the only time where I had all the information I needed! Because how I feel about the two of you isn't dependent on information about anyone else other than myself! But no, you asked me out on the day I met you, and I've had to make this decision having known both of you for less than a week! Of course this decision was going to be bad and half-assed, what the hell were you expecting-" His fingers stopped as his head snapped towards Darron's appearance. The only reason he had heard him was because Lance couldn't actually speak. He'd permit himself to feel relief that Danny had made up with him later, but right now there were too many other feelings in the way. They were right, Lance had given up because he had assumed Akira would give up on him. Anyone else he'd ever known had done exactly that, why would he expect something different of Akira? Because Akira loved him. He didn't even think about the possibility that Akira would have wanted to forgive him, even if he couldn't. He knew Danny wouldn't want this, he knew none of them wanted to separate. Even if he didn't like how Akira had phrased it, he couldn't pretend he wasn't at least half right. He closed his eyes and took some deep breaths before signing to Darron, "I hate it when you're right, just so we're clear on that."
K KodomoSekai Elizabeth Ashreel
Last edited: