Carry On My Wayward...Daughter?

[TabbyHere]

Flashes of red, then darkness. The only sound that could be made sense of was the pounding of her own heart, sending blood coursing through her ears. One beat, two, three... It was fast, and she was scared. A scream echoed through the space, then another, but neither sound came from her own mouth; only the frantic, short breaths were hers. Another flash of red and she could see, if just for that one moment illuminating the pit, and the eldest Winchester was terrified.


Deanna woke with a start, sitting up straight on the motel mattress as a heavy gasp graced her lips. Even with her eyes wide open it took several seconds for her to realize where she was. Slowly, the small, dark room with its cheap decor began to fade into focus as her heart rate began to ease back to a resting pace. Again with nightmares, practically every time she closed her eyes, it was all she could see. Running a hand through her long bangs, she took a deep breath. When was enough going to be enough?


She swung her bare feet to the floor and shuffled to the bathroom, trying to peer through the dark until she could reach the light switch just beside the sink. As her fingers found it, her eyes met themselves in the mirror. She had just been asleep, but Deanna looked more exhausted than ever. The skin directly beneath her eyes was a shade darker than the rest, and not simply because of the smudged eyeliner with which she'd collapsed into bed without removing. Hair tousled and oversized crew neck askew, frankly, she looked a mess, and the day's job hadn't helping any. Thanks to the shapeshifter she'd nailed that evening, Deanna now sported a busted bottom lip. Just lovely.


@Jay Windse

 

[Jay Windse]

Of course the angel Castiel had been sent to watch over the elder Winchester, and he was now doing so, after having seen her nightmare.


He'd been told time and time again to not intrude in Deanna's nightmares, but he did so anyway without telling her, because he wanted the best for the hunter. He knew how to do so without being detected by the dreamer; a skill he'd learned from his brother Gabriel.


And now Castiel was soon by her side-well, almost; he was standing beside the doorway, dark hair askew and trenchcoat nearly falling from his frame from tossing as Deanna had in the likes of sleep. The angel straightened his coat before speaking. "Deanna? Are you alright?" He asked in a soft, deep voice, bright blue gaze focused on the profile view of the hunter.

 

[TabbyHere]

She had just leaned forward to give closer examination to her injured lip when a voice startled her out of her own thoughts. Emerald eyes flashing in the mirror, Deanna met Castiel's gaze in the reflection. "Jesus, Cas..." The words were muttered under her breath as she took a step back from the sink to face the angel, her fingertips falling from her face. "You should really invest in a little bell or something, let people know when you're gonna just pop in." She managed, a weak attempt at masking how shaken up the nightmare had gotten her, though she'd had similar ones several times before. Glancing back to the mirror, she tugged her sweatshirt back up onto her shoulder, covering the fingers of the handprint that adorned her skin, the leftover of her first encounter with Castiel.

 

[Jay Windse]

Castiel gave a halfhearted smile. "I apologize." He said quietly, and looked over Deanna with a rather careful gaze, focusing on her posture and also her face. He frowned as he noticed a beaten posture and a similar-looking face.


The angel caught the Mark of Cain on her shoulder as she covered it, but he focused on her split and swollen lip. "Are you alright?" He asked yet again, glancing up and meeting her emerald gaze with his crystal blue. He had seen that look she now gave him more than once; that was how he could tell she was trying to hide something, which didn't work with Castiel. He always knew when something was off, as it was now.

 

[TabbyHere]

Deanna tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, singing softly as Castiel posed his question again. "Fine." She paused as she felt his gaze scan over her, his eyes catching on her bottom lip. "This? This is nothing." She added, her right hand motioning to her mouth. "I caught a shapeshifter's good left hook, that's all." With a shrug and the forced hint of a smirk, Deanna slipped past Castiel to the motel room's outdated mini fridge. She suspected that he knew much more than he was letting on or the angel wouldn't be paying her visit. But Deanna wasn't anywhere near being in the mood for an old fashioned heart to heart. Leaning down a bit, she swung the fridge open and grabbed a beer.

 

[Jay Windse]

Castiel followed and stood a few feet to her left, and frowned. He didn't want to prod at her; he really didn't. But why didn't the hunter trust him enough so as to just tell him.


It didn't matter that the angel already knew what was going on. All that did was whether Deanna would tell him or not.

 

[TabbyHere]

As she nudged the fridge door closed with her knee, Deanna pressed the chilled glass of the bottle to her lip, appreciating the cool numbness it provided. Her eyes glanced past Castiel to the motel's second bed where Sam should be. It was unoccupied, of course. He'd left that morning to catch a ride up to Bobby's on his own. Something about it being urgent. Deanna had stayed to deal with the likes of the shapeshifter, promising to join Sam and Bobby as soon as she could.


Several moments of silence passed before she spoke again, lowering the beer to her side. Just Castiel's presence made her feel guilty, causing a sick knot to form in her stomach. Sending him a quick look out of the corner of her eye, Deanna decided it would be easier just to give in. "It's the nightmares, Cas. You know..." She mumbled, taking a slow drink.

 

[Jay Windse]

Castiel frowned. "The same one?" He asked softly, stepping slightly closer to Deanna.

 

[TabbyHere]

Deanna shrugged and cast her gaze down towards her feet. "They're all more or less the same, yeah." She cleared her throat softly before insisting, "They're just dreams. It's annoying but I'm fine. No big deal."

 

[Jay Windse]

"You are anything but fine. That I can tell just by looking at you." Castiel said, a frown once again on his face.


»JW

 

[TabbyHere]

She scoffed and ran a hand over her forehead. "What do you want me to say? Hm?" Deanna turned to look him in the eye, trying to muster up a hard glare.

 

[Jay Windse]

"The truth." Castiel stepped closer, blue eyes hard. "I want you to trust me." He said the last quietly, glancing down.


»JW

 

[TabbyHere]

There was a moment of hesitation before Deanna looked away, glaring instead at the motel's peeling wallpaper. She'd foolishly thought that maybe, just maybe, if she didn't let anything slip, if she just dealt with it, it would go away. Then she could forget, but she hadn't forgotten. It'd been months and she hadn't been able to will the images away.


"It's hell." She snapped. "Is that satisfactory? Every single one of them. I dream about being downstairs."

 

[Jay Windse]

Castiel backed away and turned around. "I'm sorry." He whispered.


»JW

 

[TabbyHere]

Her eyes softened as Castiel gave an apology. She instantly regretted her words, seeing as the angel just wanted to help. A heavy sigh escaped her lips. "No... No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have..." Her voice trailed off as she sunk into a seat at the room's small round table.

 

[Jay Windse]

"No, it's fine. I see." Castiel sighed and looked out the window to the crappy view, running a hand through his hair.


»JW

 

[TabbyHere]

Deanna folded her arms on the tabletop and laid her head down, her forgotten beer setting a few inches away. She sat perfectly still for a good two or three minutes, almost enjoying the silence, before she interrupted it. "I don't know why it won't stop." She murmured without lifting her head. "I'm here but I still can't get away from it."

 

[Jay Windse]

Castiel looked at her. He didn't know how to help. He couldn't tell her anything but truth, which in all honesty, sucked at the moment.


»JW

 

[TabbyHere]

The room had fallen silent again when Deanna's ringtone filled the air. Slowly raising her head, she sent a glance towards the clock on the nightstand before tilting her seat back to stretch for her duffle bag; the time read 3:47. Her cell phone rested just inside the main pocket. Fingers wrapped around the device, she raised it to her ear. "Yeah?" The caller was Sam, and what he said, he said quickly. "Now? Sam, just tell-" Deanna gave a short groan and rolled her eyes. "Fine. Yeah, fine."


Pushing herself to her feet, she ended the call and tossed her phone to the bed. Without another word, she grabbed a handful of clothing items from the duffle and started back towards the bathroom.

 

[Jay Windse]

Castiel glanced at her and sighed, assuming it was something urgent and he couldn't go. He stuck his hands in his coat and stared out the window, thinking.


»JW

 

[TabbyHere]

Deanna was ready in a matter of minutes, quickly changing into a pair of faded jeans and a dark grey v-neck beneath an open navy button up and applying a thin layer of fresh makeup. "You coming?" She was still pulling her hair up into a messy ponytail as she slipped out of the bathroom. "Sam wants me up at Bobby's. Now." Shoving her feet into her shoes, she threw a glance towards Castiel.

 

[Jay Windse]

"I can come?" Castiel asked, confused. He turned back around and looked at her.


»JW

 

[TabbyHere]

She shrugged as she zipped up her bag and pulled it onto her shoulder. "I'm not stopping you." Snatching up her phone in one hand and the keys to the Impala in the other, she nodded towards the door. "Besides, it's weird driving alone now." She offered a small smile, as if trying to smooth over the awkwardness that had settled in.

 

[Jay Windse]

Castiel nodded and followed her. "I'll come then.' He smiled softly at her, eyes shining.


»JW

 

[TabbyHere]

Deanna stepped out of the room and onto the sidewalk. It was still dark outside, as well as a little hazy from the day's rain. Her smile widened just slightly as she laid eyes on her treasured Chevy. Only after tossing her duffle in the Impala's trunk did she slide in the driver's seat and turn the key in the ignition. "Sammy said Bobby had something big. Really big." She said as the engine roared to life. "He didn't want to talk about it over the phone."