Blood and Water (♠ Blue Suit ♠)

(S'Okay ^^ I was playing tennis with my parents either way, so I was away)


Mia was quite taken aback when she found in Tome's eyes something she had never seen before, a hint of vulnerability. Her eyes widened lightly and her lips quivered. She wanted to say something but no words seemed to appear on her mind. But then he looked away and Mia hadn't even realized she had been holding her breath until she lowered her eyes herself, taking in a deep breath and letting it out noiselessly a couple of times


"Tome... Have you even ever allowed yourself to wish for something else?" She finally asked as quietly as him. She didn't mean for him to stop thinking about her sister, nor for him to stop wishing for her well being. It was just... As if she actually wanted to know if he had ever thought about him and him alone.
 
((Oo, tennis. I always wanted to play tennis, but my family and I tried when we lived in a condo that had tennis courts nearby, and I failed miserably xD I don't have good enough hand-eye for that lol))


One of Tome's hands, resting where it was beneath his head, curled tight into his own hair. Who was she, to ask him these questions? To make him think of things he hadn't let himself dwell on since early childhood. "I am the b****** child of a King," He said, finally, after a long pause, "And the product of two species come together. There has never been the room." He had never had the time, the resources, or the privilege to have what he wanted, and he was so often destroyed with those same things that he had taught himself to stop wanting altogether. He wasn't sure he was even capable of it anymore.
 
(Lol but I believe in what my dad says: 'It's just a matter of practice')


For a moment there, Mia felt puzzled. Something within her told her to stop, she could see he didn't like this conversation, much less her questions. However, she felt as if she couldn't really leave it alone. Damn! In one way it even made her so mad! "And what about that?" She hissed silently, surprised by her own way of reacting "I once had a baby brother. He was also...!" She bit her tongue for a moment to stop herself from revealing unnecessary things "He was also an illegitimate son of the father of a powerful couple. A halfbreed as well" Her eyes narrowed a bit "Even more, he had a pretty poor health, but that never stopped him from anything, even when he was shunned, he was a kid that fought against everyone else's prejudices" She felt her tears welling up, but stopped them "You're just a coward, that hides behind that mask of yours. There exists many half breeds, 'don't think yourself special' because you're one of them" She spat quietly sort of bitterly, using some of the exact words he had used with her before. Oh, lord! There I had blown up my chance of coming back She thought to herself, but didn't say anything more.
 
((Yeah, but I also lose interest in new pursuits a lot, so I knew it wouldn't last anyway lol It takes something really interesting or cool or enjoyable to keep me hooked))


Tome could have ignored most of what she said, even as he tried to piece together the little bits of story she had inadvertently given him over the course of their living and working together. But when she spoke of him as if she knew his past, as if she knew what he thought and how he felt - he no longer had to tolerate her.


Tome sat up, his previously blank expression shifting quickly into a fierce glare, one that hid a temper he kept in check. "You think I see myself as special?" He hissed, voice low but dangerous. "Shall I tell you of the days I spent training well past the point that I began to bleed, to be perfect so that no one could claim I was disobedient and strike me down for it? Shall I tell of the nights I laid awake, chained and bleeding into the stone for breaking routine? I am the exact opposite of special. I am nothing - and you haven't the right to blame me for your own pains."
 
Even if she cringed lightly when she heard his voice, Mia kept with her eyes on him, not allowing herself to look to the side. At the end, her eyes widened lightly "I... I'm not blaming you for my own pains" Had it sounded like that? "That's not true" She whispered, her tone was much more composed now "You're no nothing. You've never been nothing. Why won't you believe that?" Her brow's furrowed a bit "I was just trying to say... Just trying to get you to understand that even if everyone around you has told you you're less than nothing. There is one person..." She glanced at Fawn before looking back at him "No... Two people that believe the opposite" Was she being conceited to be saying those words? Yeah... Maybe she was, but it didn't really matter right now.
 
Tome followed her gaze to his sister, then looked back at Mia again, fingers curling tight against the ground. "Don't," He hissed, "try to make others understand when you yourself understand nothing at all." But there was no understanding in her at all, and felt the idiotic urge to break something. "When one receives nothing from the world, one must be nothing, or else be ripped to pieces in short order." He shook his head sharply, got to his feet and picked Fawn delicately up from the couch to keep her form waking. "You know nothing of me and nothing of her, and I haven't the patience for your pathetic attempts at finding a solution to a problem that doesn't need to be solved and has no solution besides." He turned on his heel, after that, and made his way towards the stairs, expression dark. "Sleep well alone."
 
"But I could try..." She whispered softly though he was already gone. She finally lowered her eyes before a tiny tear rolled down her cheek. She felt frustrated. She... She didn't want to be there any longer, she felt sick. She felt really really sick. She groaned quietly and tried to move, the pain - which had disappeared - ran up her spine, but she shifted. No, no, no She thought to herself. She was hyperventilating again Let me out! She rolled to her side and finally fell off the couch with a quiet thump. She bit her tongue to spot herself from crying out loud in pain. She curled on herself, grasping for air. She had to calm down! Why was she even letting it all get to her? It wasn't her business. She squeezed her eyes shut "Stop it" She muttered, panting silently.
 
Tome took Fawn up to her room and settled her in bed, taking a moment to soothe her when she started to wake. When she was sleeping soundly again, he left her to go back and just grab her book, intending not to look at Mia at all. But he got downstairs and she was lying on the floor, looking as if she were drowning on dry land, and as much as he wanted to remain cold and unfeeling, he couldn't not help her.


"I told you," He said as he walked over to her to help her back up onto the bed, "to lie still or you will never heal. Your wounds are not fully stable yet."
 
"Don't... Touch..." Choking... she was choking. She flinched a bit, squirming back "...Me" Her breath speeded up again and she could only clench her hands lightly. No, she didn't want to feel like that. How could she even feel like that? "Please..." She tried to take a deep breath but failed. The world started to spin around her, if she didn't calm down she would surely faint. Now that she thought about it, she had started to have that 'condition' ever since her brother died.
 
Tome started to draw back until he finally realized what was happening. It was much too similar to one of Fawn's panics for comfort, but at least he knew what to do. Spending so much time with her, he knew how to deal with things like this, even if Mia didn't want it.


"Calm," He urged, reaching for her and moving her whether she liked it or not, straightening out her legs with one hand and slipping the other beneath her neck to keep her straight on the ground, chin tilted back just a bit. "Lie flat and open the airway," He said, to inform her of what to do later on and to warn her of what he was doing. "It's all right." He took one of her hands, holding gently but firmly. "The air will come back. Just let it."
 
Mia struggled a bit when he reached for her, she didn't want to be touched. She felt scared. If he touched her, if he helped her, she might break down. She painfully reached for his own hand to shove him away, but then he spoke and by reflex she obeyed what he instructed her. She glanced at him desperately, her gaze finding his. And fortunately, just like that, his voice and words finally did reach her. She nodded and tried to believe in his words. It will be alright She repeated to herself. Her fingers wrapped tightly around his hand, her other hand clutching her own clothes. Eventually, her trembling stopped and she breathed in deeply, her lungs on fire because of the air that was entering them when there was a lack of it before. She felt a cold sweat rolling down her forehead as she was finally letting the air in.
 
((Sorry, dad came home from trip to phoenix and I had to say hi lol))


Tome waited until Mia's breath evened out, holding her hand and keeping her steady. Finally, he slipped his hand slowly out from beneath her neck, and disengaged her grip on his other hand. "Wait here a moment," He said, gentle still because it was so much easier to take care of people than it was to talk to them, and got up to walk away. When he returned, he had a cup of water and a damp cloth in hand. He sat her up, supporting her with an arm, and let her drink the water, then dabbed gently at her face to get rid of the sweat that had gathered there. "You're all right." She would be fine.
 
(No worries :) )


Mia looked at him and his own gentleness made her heart ache. As if it just hurt so much to be given such kindness. Maybe she hadn't really suffered as most did, but ever since her mother died she had been used to be treated not that well. She felt a shudder spreading through all her body and squeezed her eyes shut for a moment "Out.." She muttered softly. She opened her eyes - which were rather pleading - to look at him directly on his own pair of ones "Can't I go out?" If she stayed on that place for too long, she feared she would panic again.
 
((I just bounced up like "Dadddyyy!! \(^.^)/ I made muffins :3 Go eat one." lol . . . I am 20 years old. I should not do this xD ))


Tome looked back at her when she looked him, not wanting to meet her eyes but doing so anyway, and after a silent debate with himself finally just sighed. Shaking his head, he shifted enough to hook an arm under her legs and lift her right up off the ground with him as he stood and walked for the back door. "You can go out, but no walking." Her legs hadn't taken much damage, so they were probably fine, but he didn't want to risk her falling.
 
(Nah! I have an older sister that is 30 years old and she is much 'worse' xD . Oh, muffins! Damn now that you mentioned them I want one *¬*)


Mia just nodded a bit. Going out and breathing in fresh air would do for now. As soon as he opened the door and the cool outside air blew against her face she let out a content sigh. Never would she have thought she would be so grateful for being... well out "Thanks" She muttered under her breath.
 
((I would give you one but, alas, the internet is not capable of sending muffins. Well. They're technically cupcakes, but they're so thick and taste like banana bread so I call them muffins))


Tome wasn't truly sure what to say in response to her thanking him, so he just nodded and set her down on one of the outside chairs. "I'll get you some more water." He said, knowing her throat would probably feel dry, and moved away to go back in and get it. He didn't want to be trapped into talking to her again, but he couldn't just leave her alone outside either.
 
(Sounds nice :3 Will have to beg my mother to buy some tomorrow)


Mia watched him disappearing inside the house before she turned her head to the side and stared absently into some random bushes "I should seriously learn how to keep my mouth shut" She finally whispered, shaking her head a little "And learn how to stop talking to myself" She added, a small tired smile settling on her face. What a long day had that one been.
 
Tome came back a minute or so later with a glass of water, and set it in her good hand, perching lightly in a chair a few feet away once she had it. He rested on arm on a raised knee and just looked out towards the lake, the afternoon sun shining brightly off of it. It was beautiful out here. It was why he'd brought Fawn here, so she could see the beauty she always loved, without worrying about being able to get home quickly. This was home.


((Night! I'll be back some time in the morning))
 
Mia yawned lightly before she followed Tome's gaze to the lake. For once, remaining completely quiet and not finding the silence uncomfortable. It was truly a sigh worth seeing. She shifted and curled a bit into the chair, as far as her body allowed it, that is. She leaned her head back a bit and was thankful to the mild breeze that would blow from time to time against her face. If she could stay there all night long she wouldn't even mind it.
 
Tome stayed silent for a long time, glad to be able to not talk. He checked on Fawn, once or twice, while Mia wanted to stay outside, but she was doing fine on her own so he let her be. When it was dark, he finally sat up from his seat and looked at Mia, waiting expectantly. "Do you want to go back in yet?" It had been hours, and he wasn't going to sleep out here with her.
 
Mia had actually enjoyed the silence all along. Not really minding it when she was left alone when he walked back into the house once or twice. Somehow, she hadn't even noticed it was so late, until Tome's words snapped her back to reality. She turned to look at him and stared right into his eyes. One side of her, really wanted to stay outside, even to sleep there. But the other side, the more rational one, told her it may not had been such a good idea. What she needed now was to recover and if the night suddenly decided to turn cold, she couldn't afford for her to even get sick because of that "Yeah, please" She said in a low tone of voice and automatically shifted to stand up for herself, only to be reminded by her body dull complain that she couldn't do that either. She bit her lip to stop a silent growl of frustration from escaping it. Now she was just feeling useless.


(Sorry v.v Got busy building the doggy a house with my sister and my dad)
 
Tome held out a hand when Mia started to get up, trying to warn her into sitting back down. Not only was she hurt still, she had to be stiff from sitting so long. He moved over to her when she sat back down, and just picked her up again like before. "If you're going to move, you have to do it gradually. You can't just jump up all at one. Move one limb at a time, then stand when you can support yourself properly."


((Sounds fun ^_^ ))
 
Mia couldn't help it but huff "I'm not used to be in this...!" She started, kind of vexed. However, she blinked and lowered her eyes to her hands, composing herself ".... kind of 'situation'. I avoid them, to be honest. So..." A sigh escaped her "I may not really have the patience" She shook her head "Sorry"
 
Tome arched an eyebrow at her but didn't comment on her impatience, just took her all the way upstairs to her old bed, her old bedroom unchanged, and laid her down. "You'll have to learn it for the next few days, then." He said, shaking his head. "I'll do my best to be patient as well. Have you any need of anything before I leave?" He had to get some sleep as well.


((How do you always know when I'm on? lol Well, I'll be back in ten-fifteen minutes or so. I gotta run to a friends house and set up shop since I'm cat-sitting while they're gone. Maybe if I sit around for a while she'll stop being all mopey and come out to sit with me.))
 
"No, I'm fine, you should get some sleep" Mia said as she pulled the blankets over her lightly. She then looked away from his face and rolled to her side, lying her cheek against the cool pillow "Thank you" She expressed her gratitude for him one last time before closing her eyes.


(Because I'm stalking you Muahaha! Lol Jk xD )
 
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