Fantasy Angels VS. Demons:The Eternal War

[Lord Bradorian]

I honestly think that @Malphaestus is completely destroying you, @EasternGhost. No offense


 
His words are more...sophisticated and he uses a lot more complexity in his lyrics than you. "For unlike you, my friend, I actually use my whim" I think is accurate. No offense.

 

[Bambie]

Hey guys! Finally back from my trip. Ill be posting a lot more this week.


@KurtH6355 ill finally be able to post for Electra. I honestly didnt know what to do with her until @Seraph Darkfire did his spell.

 

[The Creator Prime]

@Bambie, judge our rap battle.

 

[Lord Bradorian]

Really looking forward to the post.


 
I find it funny how neither the King nor Queen give a shit about their youngest Prince, who is also missing.

 

[Bambie]

@Malphaestus Haha, for sure


@KurtH6355 ill get on the post's soon. Just proof reading a friends fanfic. I promised >.>

 

[EasternGhost]

I don't see how Malphaestus won but eh to each his own. As far as sophisticated...check the vocabulary used...I was more sophisticated. But like I said, to each their own.


 
I also have almost twice as many rhyming words.

 

[Lord Bradorian]

Hm. I guess you had some good Vocab, but I still think Mal came out on top, imo.

 

[EasternGhost]

I guess I used too many big words. That tends to hurt me when non-rappers judge the battles.

 

[Bambie]

Wait, did I miss the rap battle already? Haha

 

[The Creator Prime]

Scr00b, that had nothing to do with it.


@Bambie, it's literally one page back.

 

[EasternGhost]

What is Scroob?

 

[The Creator Prime]

Google it.

 

[EasternGhost]

I'm a scrub and a noob? lol. Yeah, saying big words has nothing to do with it? That alone tells me you know little to nothing about rapping. When recording an actual song...yes fancy wordplay and large vocabulary has not so much. But when writing lyrics that you don't intend to record..it has EVERYTHING to do with it. You would know this if you actually knew anything about it. I can give you my site I use and show you. I don't even need to say anymore. Look at tons of battles and I can show your "SCROOB" ass how large words and vocab does matter.

 

[The Creator Prime]

I was joking. No need to be sour.

 

[Lord Bradorian]

Bruh. Calm down.

 

[EasternGhost]

Yeah I apologize. Long day. Shouldn't have even came online. I got sunburn and blisters all over my back from landscaping all day so I'm wrecked and unhappy. Once again I'm sorry.

 

[The Creator Prime]

I'm not offended, nor am I upset, there's no reason to apologize. I simply want you to understand what you did.

 

[Bambie]

My posts are kinda short but they are to just ease me back into where everyone is right now ^^


P.S. i'm glad you all settled that. It was getting a little heated and I was hoping I wouldn't have to step in.

 

[Lord Bradorian]

Sorry my post is really short.


 
No offense, @Kenji Jensai, but your posts are kinda hard to understand, at least from my perspective. Grammatical errors, spelling errors, etc.

 

[Kenji Jensai]

xD ive been studying for hours let me fix it kurt.


 
that better.

 

[Lord Bradorian]

Not perfect, bud definitely better. Sorry, OCD.


 
Imma edit my post, make it longer.

 

[Kenji Jensai]

Dude there are no errors xD

 

[noticemeknot]

[QUOTE="Kenji Jensai]Dude there are no errors xD

[/QUOTE]
Ahhh... If you think that, then English is not your native language one bit. ( )

 

[Kenji Jensai]

It's not xD


 
And pls do give me an example

 

[noticemeknot]

Knew it.~


One moment!


 
Oh how interesting a fallen angel and a high ranking one too he thought to himself at a second past realization hit him like a punch in the face.


^ A run-on sentence with poor grammar. Proper structure would be something along these lines:


Oh, how interesting! A Fallen angel, and a high ranking one, too, he thought to himself. Only a second later did realization of her words dawn on him like a punch to the face.


--


"Wait did you say the majesty herself is dead!" he said.


^ Lacking proper punctuation, diction could be better and more descriptive.


"Wait, did you say her Majesty is dead," he exclaimed, a frightful edge to his tone.


--


Well, what a pity seems as if fate already made the devil pay for his crimes in my place and it seems twice the amount I could have, did he thought.


^ Also a run-on sentence with poor grammar. When announcing your characters thoughts, try to mark them in some way. I prefer the use of italics for this. Also with thoughts, you don't always have to end or begin the sentence with "he/she thought."


Well, what a pity. It seems as if fate has made the devil pay for his crimes in my place, at twice the measure I could have accomplished.


--





These are just the first three sentences in your latest reply. There are at least one or two errors in every sentence, but that's understandable since English isn't your first language. But the more you practice, the more you'll learn and the better you'll get!