Where am I? [F X F preferably, will do others ]

[Catxoxo]

Stella wondered why Hana had become so silent all of a sudden. Was it because she was so shocked that she was gay? Or maybe Hana wasn't into people who were gay? Or she could be in the closet. Either way, Stella chose not to read into it too far. Whatever it was, she was sure she'd find out soon enough, or maybe she wouldn't and that was okay too. Regardless, Stella would always be comfortable in her own skin. She hated hiding who she was, and while she didn't flaunt her sexuality, she wasn't going to run from it either. She had been made to feel shameful in the past, but Stella was over that.


"Oh yeah, it's no problem. I think most people do.. I don't exactly scream butch!" Stella chuckled lightly to herself before taking another slice of pizza. She wanted to keep the mood light, and hoped that Hana would be less nervous about the topic. "But in all seriousness, I think that there aren't many people out there with fantastic gaydar, and that's okay too." She shrugged. Stella was pleased to know that Hana was comfortable enough to share that she was bisexual. Her gaydar wasn't impeccable, but she was sure she'd sensed some amount of queerness in Hana. "Nothing wrong with that. There are plenty of people who swing one way or another, it's definitely normal."

 

[cyberbarista]

"Yeah, it's always been hard for me to figure someone else out." Hana reflected briefly on all the times she had crushed on someone and had no success ever finding out if they liked her back. Hana smiled, happy to be able to be forward about her sexuality. This city was filled with all sorts of people, and Hana was glad to know she was lucky enough to find an accepting person. "You know... where I come from, I wouldn't have been able to tell you that straight up." She said, continuing to eat her food and setting her feet up on the desk, knowing she could easily take them down if a guest came in. "If I wanted to be with a girl, I'd have to approach them in secret... lots of beating around the bush and whatnot." She took a moment to reminisce, then looked over at Stella and smiled. Here was a girl she had made friends with in such a short time, that she could open up to and come to for help. And now she was confessing a very little known part of herself to this girl. Hana was happy she had her, because if she didn't have Stella she would be utterly alone in her decision to run off to the city.


"No really one knew besides the few girls I... got with, or whatever." She summarized, not wanting to go too much into detail. "And it was usually a 'straight-girl-gone-wild' deal, only after me because she felt crazy one night or whatever." Hana sighed. She only had one real relationship, but she didn't really want to bring it up until she was confident Stella wouldn't take Hana's feelings lightly. Not that she didn't trust Stella, Hana just had a hard time digging up the past. She put her feet back down on the ground and spun around in her chair. Hana wondered about Stella, and if she had ever gotten with anyone and how often it happened. But it wasn't her business, so she didn't ask.

 

[Catxoxo]

" that makes sense... People can be really difficult to figure out, you think you really know them but you actually don't. It's why I find the human race to be so fascinating. " Stella mused smiling over at Hana. The other girl seemed to be feeling a bit more comfortable with the discussion, so Stella continued. "I'm sorry that it's been difficult finding people who understood, and even finding other women. Honestly, I had the same issues growing up. I lived in a small town in Kansas and when I say small, I mean a town that had only 700 people in it. It was difficult, most people were Christians and did not approve of me being gay. So I totally understand where you're coming from."


Stella continue to listen to Hana intently. She truly wanted to understand the other girl's struggles. Some of their issues were a bit similar, and now that Stella was in a place where she was more confident in her sexuality she felt that she could help her friend. " well I do not advocate hiding who you are, I think that sneaking around was probably in your best interest. People are awful, they just don't understand this or they choose not to…" Stella said with a sigh. "My mom knew. I willingly told her I was dating a girl but I got through now from no my mom knew. I willingly told her I was dating a girl but I got thrown out of the house for it she hated that I was gay and since then I haven't heard from her... I was 16 when that happened." She sighed to herself before glancing over at Hana. "Yes I know those types of girls. I typically try to stay away from them. They end up causing more harm than good… I'm sorry that was mostly your experience with women..."