Rumble Fish
The Paradise Hunter
The following is a collaboration between myself and
Soma Schicksal
Soma Schicksal
Colt glanced at Luca as he commented on her statement, not expecting anyone to actually answer her. She darted her glazed eyes a little as she then sighed and got up again, though she did struggle on her feet.
“Well,” she hiccuped a little, “Imma go wash.” she didn’t even say ‘bye’ or anything as she walked past everyone and into the upstairs bathroom. Shutting the door, Colt sighed deeply as she leaned against the door. Everything was spinning and almost as if she walked she’d either drop to the floor or completely lose her balance. Everything was drifting in and out of her thoughts. She had to focus. What was she here for again? Oh yeah; washing.
Colt stripped and sat in the bath, taking the shower head and simply blasting it all over. This was typical. Usually, she was too hungover or drunk or… both to do it properly so this was the easiest. The blood rushed away like the shower scene from Psycho. It felt good but still, Colt felt as though she was full of gunk that could not be washed away. Wash off blood like it was nothing. Was this how she was now? The notion of being covered in and then ridding herself of someone else's blood did not even faze her. She hated it.
Even when she was done, and had gotten half dressed, Colt was still too disturbed and annoyed to consider doing anything other than just sit in this bath and stare at the ceiling. while taking occasional sips from the wine. What else was she good for right now?
---
Marcus watched as the situation seemed to simmer down itself with both the neckbeard explaining his side and Colt letting her guard down. The man sighed, this whole mess was a lot to take in so, rather than try to wrap his head around it, he walked through the lodge and up the stairs, intending to sit in his room to recollect his thoughts. However, just as he got there, nature called.
“Ssshit...I need to piss.” He say sucking in the air as he rushed to the restroom not even taking the time to see if the room was occupied. Marcus let out a sigh of relief as his system was gone of its waste. Just as he flushed the toilet and opened his eyes again happy that he made it to the restroom and didn't embarrass himself his mouth gaped open noticing the military woman in just cargo pants drinking wine as if this was normal.
“Uhhh...C-Colt-those umm-ya sorry I didn't know you were in here...I'ma get going now…” he quickly turned his face away from her direction feeling embarrassed and not wanting to potentially get his ass whooped for seeing her the way she was. He quickly washed his hands not wanting to be gross and making his way back to the hall.
---
Colt had already finished most of the wine when she heard the door suddenly open. The woman froze, her bloodshot eyes widening as she glanced at the door without moving her head. For a second, in her hazed state, she could have sworn it was a Thing or a Hazmat, and she did not have her gun! But upon looking for longer, she realised it was indeed the silver-haired Marcus who seemed totally unaware of her presence. He went to the toilet as Colt could only sit there, diverting her gaze as to not stare. This was awkward enough. It was not until he had finished his business and got as big a fright as she had gotten. After a hurried apology, he raced off.
“Hey!” she growled, frustrated that her privacy had been compromised (even though it was her own fault for forgetting to shut the door.) Putting the bottle down, she sprang to her feet, forgetting that she had not dried off the bottom of the Nike attached to her prosthetic, so when she went for the door, it caused her to slip. Colt fell against the door-frame, feeling a hard pain through her shoulder. The ex-Marine gripped her shoulder as she tried to get back up, cursing up a storm.
Managing to get herself upright, Colt breathed heavily from the shock of the fall, needing to lean on the door-frame for support, leaning on her now bad shoulder no less.
“Did-did,” she hiccoughed, “Didn’t yer da teach ye to KNOCK first?”
---
As the man was leaving all that could be heard was the booming and collapse of Colt. He turned around to her groaning and trying to act as tough as always. He went over and help her up. “Here...I didn't know you were in here! Didn't your dad teach you to lock the door?” He said and noticed the pain she was in. He sighed. “Here let's go to my room, you need to lay down.” he helped her through the hallway and to his room where he closed the door not wanting anyone to know what happened.
He sat her on the bed and helped prop her up with some blankets and pillows. “There is that better? Just try not to put too much weight on your shoulder.” He looked into her eyes a moment before quickly diverting them again. Looking at her just made him more disappointed in himself.
---
“Fuckin’...” she grabbed the bottle where she had dropped it, “Smartass.” she added, though she was a little surprised when he helped her, saying that she had to lie down. Colt wanted to deny it but at this point, she might as well have been floating on air with how light headed she felt.
“I’m fine. Dandy.” she tried to resist but clearly failed as she was now sitting on the man’s bed as he propped up her shoulder. She watched as he looked her in the eye for a few minutes before he glanced away. Despite her state, she noticed that he seemed rather bothered about something. She took a drink from the bottle before frowning a little.
“Somethin’ wrong?” she asked. Why she was asking was beyond her, “Y’all seem distracted.”
---
He ignored her ramblings until she pointed out him seeming distracted. He blinked and looked at the ground blinking a few more times. “I...Dont know what you are talking about.” His voice was gone of emotion, what would she care? Why would she act like she cares now? Bet all she's really worried about is Owen, that's who was important to her throughout the whole scavenge. That's when he muttered to himself.
“I shouldn't have went with you... That was a mistake, i should have stayed here.” Is all he managed to let out, it was silent but she should have been close enough to hear.
---
Colt frowned as she heard him muttering something under his breath, saying that he should have stayed put and not come. Her head shot up and she stared at him with an expression that could only be described as a mix of frustration and disbelief.
“The fuck ya sayin’? I guess tellin’ us how to get out that gunshop and ‘elpin’ me with them Hazzies, stoppin’ us from being ripped apart is a mistake then?” she tried to keep her voice angry but her words were floaty and slightly jumbled, but she was dead serious in her words, “Ya sayin’ I’m stupid or somethin’ for picking ya?” How else was she supposed to take that?
---
He still didn't stare at her and just grit his teeth. “Of course I'm glad i helped you... Of course, I am... I just didn't want anyone to die…” he then turned and faced her with an expression of irritation. “Why did you choose now to try and care...?” He paused a moment. “You miss him don't you? Heh I'm surprised you didn't follow him when he left.” He didn't know what else to say but he kept it bottled inside all this time he just wanted to be an asshole and let all his feelings out...so he did.
“I'm such a fucking...uggghh…” he looked away from her again. “Colt... I don't wanna keep going... I don't see the point…” he chuckled. “Like look at how weak i am just from you hanging out with Owen, what use am i if I'm not okay mentally?” He looked back at her again his eyes beginning to water as he was fighting his tears from appearing.
---
Colt was taken aback at what he said, “The fuck ya on about? Nobody died!” she protested in confusion. He then asked her why she even cared now, “Wait- Who’s sayin’ I don’t-!?” she was interrupted again as he then began to ramble on about how she probably missed ‘him’. What was he talking about? Owen? Why was he so concerned about her interacting with Owen? What had she done?
“Miss- I want him back alive!” she answered bluntly, not appreciating his tone. What was he even trying to say?! None of this made sense! She only stopped feeling so angry and confused when he then said something that Colt herself was only too familiar with. The thought of not wanting to go on. Wanting to give up. But, she was still thoroughly confused by his reasoning.
“Wait a minute…” Her head tilted to one side, not having the real strength to keep it straight, “Y’think I… love Owen or some shit?” her eyes narrowed, honestly she could barely understand what he was saying. Was she hearing this right or was she just more drunk than she had thought? Colt shook her head a little as she took on more wine, still trying to make sense of it.
---
“Yes... Something like that, don't act like you don't like him... You stayed around him the whole trip...I'm such a dumbass... I shouldn't have kissed you before... I could have just tried harder…” he felt like he was being too emotional but nothing really ever went right for Marcus, especially with dating, no matter what he did he always seemed to fuck up. Maybe he just tried too hard. He glanced over at his pistol and picked it up starting at it a moment.
“I'm being stupid... I shouldn't have said anything... Especially when you are drunk... You are definitely confused... Fuck…” he just tucked his knees in, he was being such a child.
---
“Marcus… What the fuck are ya talkin about?” Colt’s bottom lip hung in disbelief as to what she was hearing, “I-I like- I hardly know him! How the fuck am I supposed to like him?! Well… I do, but as in, I think he’s reliable! Not like love!” she was honestly unable to understand what he was talking about, the world was coming to an end, they were at risk of being attacked every second, and he was worried that she might be in love with someone? She looked at the gun in his hand and frowned.
“Give me that.” she reached a hand out for the weapon, “I just don’t understand how ya came to that conclusion. You think I’m some floozie? Fallin’ over every man I meet?” she added. She could not help but feel somewhat insulted by the insinuation.
“So, if it bothers ya that much, how do ya feel about me?” she asked him, her eyebrows still furrowed as her wine sodden mind struggled to understand all of this. He’d have to make it explicit.
---
“I...Ya i know... I just... I guess that's like me hardly knowing you yet I kissed you... I shouldn't have done that, I should have tried to handle the situation differently.” He didn't realize she felt insulted. Guess it makes sense why but at the same time she's only really seemed like she had an interest in two guys, him and Owen.
“N-no... I just feel like he's done more for you and you took a liking to him more... I'm honestly just stupid for making this a priority over survival... Its just what if i never get the chance to actually date someone, especially someone like you Colt, you are strong, you are pretty damn smart even for being drunk 90 percent if the time, and you have gun skill... What if i die before that?” he thought for a moment then she took his gun away. “Calm down, I was just looking at it. I wasn't gonna do anything.” He felt like a real idiot, next time just keep your mouth shut Marcus.
She asked how did he feel about her and he jumped up, i mean he technically already confessed to her how he felt but he may have been too vague. “I like you... And i want a chance to be with you. This definitely isn't the right time to think about that but that's just how I feel. And I guess if you mean anything else I basically already commented you on what i liked about you so... Ya”
---
Colt sighed and took on some more wine as he talked more. He seemed to be coming to his senses about the whole thing. When he mentioned kissing her, she made a grumbling noise in her throat and looked away for a second.
“Call me a dummy but I thought ya was just tryin’ to snap me outta that.” she rubbed the back of her head. This whole thing was new for Colt, or at the very least unfamiliar.
“Hmm… Well… At least yer being fuckin’ honest with me now.” she said, in a tone that was a mix of understanding but also a tinge of disappointment. Why didn’t he say anything before? Even though Colt thought the whole thing to be ridiculous, he was under her command so she would at the very least have liked a heads up.
---
“I mean... I was but I was more preparing to die to be honest with you heh... Lets just say my luck with getting females isn't the greatest so I at least wanted... That before I was gone ya know? But we all survived...for now so it all feels weird. Like I made a mistake and that you didn't really enjoy the kiss as much as I did.” He chuckled nervously but the direction of her eyes insisted that she actually died enjoy the kiss a bit. He gave a slight eyebrow raise.
“I mean it's not like I wasn't honest with you before. Anyway, mind if I ask...did you actually enjoy it? Just wondering if my skill on reading emotions is good or not.” He finished continuing to look at her.
---
“Hm. Evry’dy was.” she shrugged, going to drink more wine but realised she was empty, with a huff of annoyance, she got the beer bottle she had taken with her. She pulled the top off as he then explained how he felt about the kiss, expressing the now awkwardness of the situation since they hadn’t been killed like they had expected to, “I mean…. It wasn’ like- bad or nuffin.” she rubbed the back of her neck, she really did not know what to say that would upset the man.
“I jus’,” she burped into her fist, “I dunno whatto thin’. I mean… I’ve not know whatto thin’ for a loooong time.” she sighed, taking a sip from the beer. At this point her eyes were unfocused and her stomach had bloated from the alcohol, a regular occurance for Colt so she was unfazed.
“Yer… no’ a bad kisser, I’ll go’ ya that.”
---
He gave a nod and smiled a bit at her complimenting his kissing skills, kinda sad that he would feel happier because of that but considering what he's been through before this was a big plus. “Thanks, I appreciate that... Well umm... That was it I suppose but do you mind me asking why is it you drink so much? I always assumed it was because of you being in the military but if like to know for sure... Sorry if it's personal.” He didn't want to get too much into her business but she drank literally every second of the day, there was no way she would be living that long if she kept going.
---
Colt frowned a little and she glanced at the ground as she listened to him asking about her drinking. She was unsure as to what to do or say about it. She had not talked to anyone about it. Colt blinked a few times as she tried to think of what to answer him.
“I dunno… Just, helps I guess. I mean, today. Just today.” she said with a sigh, “I mean, it’s no’ like it’s a problem or nothin’. Stressful day ‘n all. Could say it was that bu’ I dunno.” she tried to explain the best she could, despite repeating herself. She took a long drink from the beer. Her mind was still swimming with everything that happened this day. She just could not shake any of it off.
“Couldn’ even git ‘im his fuckin’ cigarettes right.” she grumbled, that was the cherry on the top.
---
“ I mean it had to have happened before today...iIts like you live off of drinking. You breathe liquor.” He chuckled at his statement before stopping. “Heh, sorry. Anyway, point is, you shouldn't lie, I understand your frustrating from today but even before we knew about this apocalypse you were drinking already, we did go to your apartment you know...so evidence is there.” He explained. “I seen your name was Colette... Its a beautiful name... I hope you don't mind if i call you it from time to time.”
He then seen she felt guilty for her actions today. “And I see that the performance of everyone including yourself today wasn't the best but Colette... No one is perfect... Guess that's a lesson I need to learn too but the point is, we got out safety and we all just met each other. We did well today and no one died. Now, do you really think thays something to be upset about? Of course you will say, 'oh but Marcus I almost got everyone killed and I'm a horrible leader' but at the end of the day we all counted on you and you brought us back safely with a hell of a lot of supplies and not to mention you just saved more people and brought them in here to help them survive. So if anything you far passed the mission, you are a superhero.” He explained.
---
“Well… I jus’ like it.” she said with a shrug. But as he then mentioned her full name, the woman froze. Collette? Did he seriously just say that? She gulped slightly, “Uh-Um, well, uh-” she spluttered a little. It felt almost alien for it to be said. There was a reason she had always introduced herself as Colt. Collette did not exist anymore. That woman was gone. She was killed back in Afghanistan in that tank. The ex-Marine gulped anxiously and stammered a little, unsure how to react.
“N-No, I… I don’ mind.” she said as she glanced around anxiously before taking on more beer. He then attempted to reassure her that her actions today were not as bad as she had thought. She shut her eyes tightly for a few moments.
“If I jus’ kept ev’ryone straight, n’body would be hurt, Owen wouldn’ be missin’ and I wouldn’ have ‘urt that girl.” she sighed, still struggling to process it all.
---
He sighed, all of this really wants all that bad considering how it really should have went. “Colette wanna hear what a bad job would have been? We would have been trapped in the shop still and we would have had at least two of us die then we would have got to that Motel and guess what? More of us would have died probably only bringing back three people at the most. And Owen just said he needed to get something, if anything even though i hated him i know for a fact he's gonna come back. He isn't as badly hurt as some of the other people like Ivan. He will be fine since he has Andy to live for, hey maybe he even sees this little group as some sort of family. Anyway be thankful for the good that's happened and don't focus on the bad too much. People can always improve, don't you believe that? I mean I doubt you were always this hardcore before joining the military and in in good and bad ways it changed you. Just have faith.”
---
Colt listened to him as she looked at her feet. She glanced back up at the man as he described how badly it could have gone. She sighed heavily.
The woman flinched a little as he called her Collette again. Something about it just felt wrong. Nobody called her that, not at least for the last ten years. Even her superiors would call her by her given nickname. As he then mentioned the military, she looked down.
“Hmmm…” she rolled up the cargo pants of her left leg, looking at the titanium limb, “Wouldn’ call this ‘hardcore’” she huffed.
---
“I meant you as a person is hardcore that doesn't have much to do with you missing a leg... And if anything try to thing positively about that, in this situation hell you could have a fucking shotgun for a leg and still be badass. Just know Colt that everyone here respects you. Everyone here likes you... Well except the girl you knocked out but ya anyway people look to you for advice and everything. Can you please trust me? At this point I wouldn't lie to you, I already expressed my feelings to you so that should maybe mean something towards my truth.” He said looking away a bit still feeling nervous about it.
---
She listened as Marcus assured her that there were still some good things to focus on. With a deep sigh, she finished off the beer with a belch before putting it on the floor. At this point she was beginning to feel rather faint. She looked at the man as he mentioned the girl she had knocked out. She groaned and put a hand on her head.
“Ugh… Andy’s mad at me about that.” she remembered, “Fuck,” she added. What else could she have done? Left her there? The woman looked up again as Marcus asked her to trust him. She blinked and looked down once again, scratching the back of her head.
“I guess,” she sighed, “I guess thats true.” she responded before letting out a long and loud yawn. But she could not sleep! She still had things to do! With a slight snort, she tried to get back up, intending to check on everyone and if Owen was back yet. If not, she was going to look for him.
---
“Yea probably but she will get over it, you need to rest though, you have had a long day, you hurt your shoulder, and you are far past drunk.” He explained. “Just stay and in the morning we will make sure you eat and drink lots of water so at least your hangover won't be as bad. Just let me take care of you I guess…” he offered hoping she would see that he was right even in her state.
---
Colt, despite trying to get up, fell back against the bed with a long huff. She grumbled something under her breath before listening to Marcus as he tried to get her to stay put. She sighed heavily, flopping her head against the pillow.
“I’m no’ hungry.” she sighed, though that was a total lie, it was now at least three days since her last proper meal, and at this point, her stomach was not letting her forget that fact. She huffed through her nose, “...Wa’er sounds good though.” she said finally, staring up at the ceiling.
---
He raised a brow, she was beginning to not be able to handle her liquor. “Heh, Colette... I think the liquor is finally hitting you hard, it only took a whole day.” He chuckled at her. “Just get some rest and I'll get you food and water in the morning alright?” He reassured her as he laid back on the bed feeling just as tired as her but he wouldn't sleep, not yet anyways. He just relaxed and held Colt slightly close since she seemed to be in an uncomfortable position.
---
Colt didn’t respond to that. She continued to stare at the ceiling. She let out a sigh and shut her eyes. She could hardly keep them open at this moment. She felt Marcus hold onto her, but it felt somewhat nice, despite the fact that she did not want to sleep, she started feeling herself drifting.
“‘Kay…” she sighed with a yawn, “Yer right.” she added as she started drifting to sleep even though her instincts told her to stay awake. She looked at the man through her eyelids as she struggled to think of what to say or do. It was probably the drink, but for whatever reason, she leaned over and gave Marcus a very slight, very quick peck on the cheek, hardly touching him before she turned around to face the other direction.
“Hmmm… I’ll still need t’ find Owen…”
---
Marcus yawned and his eyes opened wide as she kissed his cheek, he looked over at her but she quickly faced the other direction as she laid her head on him. He gave a slight smile and gently combed her hair with his fingers. “Hey, if he's not back tomorrow I'll go with you to go find him ‘after’ you eat breakfast but I'm sure he will be fine.” He finished with but she was already long gone in her slumber, he wasn't tired anymore but more so excited that things between them seemed to be working out a bit more.
“Well,” she hiccuped a little, “Imma go wash.” she didn’t even say ‘bye’ or anything as she walked past everyone and into the upstairs bathroom. Shutting the door, Colt sighed deeply as she leaned against the door. Everything was spinning and almost as if she walked she’d either drop to the floor or completely lose her balance. Everything was drifting in and out of her thoughts. She had to focus. What was she here for again? Oh yeah; washing.
Colt stripped and sat in the bath, taking the shower head and simply blasting it all over. This was typical. Usually, she was too hungover or drunk or… both to do it properly so this was the easiest. The blood rushed away like the shower scene from Psycho. It felt good but still, Colt felt as though she was full of gunk that could not be washed away. Wash off blood like it was nothing. Was this how she was now? The notion of being covered in and then ridding herself of someone else's blood did not even faze her. She hated it.
Even when she was done, and had gotten half dressed, Colt was still too disturbed and annoyed to consider doing anything other than just sit in this bath and stare at the ceiling. while taking occasional sips from the wine. What else was she good for right now?
---
Marcus watched as the situation seemed to simmer down itself with both the neckbeard explaining his side and Colt letting her guard down. The man sighed, this whole mess was a lot to take in so, rather than try to wrap his head around it, he walked through the lodge and up the stairs, intending to sit in his room to recollect his thoughts. However, just as he got there, nature called.
“Ssshit...I need to piss.” He say sucking in the air as he rushed to the restroom not even taking the time to see if the room was occupied. Marcus let out a sigh of relief as his system was gone of its waste. Just as he flushed the toilet and opened his eyes again happy that he made it to the restroom and didn't embarrass himself his mouth gaped open noticing the military woman in just cargo pants drinking wine as if this was normal.
“Uhhh...C-Colt-those umm-ya sorry I didn't know you were in here...I'ma get going now…” he quickly turned his face away from her direction feeling embarrassed and not wanting to potentially get his ass whooped for seeing her the way she was. He quickly washed his hands not wanting to be gross and making his way back to the hall.
---
Colt had already finished most of the wine when she heard the door suddenly open. The woman froze, her bloodshot eyes widening as she glanced at the door without moving her head. For a second, in her hazed state, she could have sworn it was a Thing or a Hazmat, and she did not have her gun! But upon looking for longer, she realised it was indeed the silver-haired Marcus who seemed totally unaware of her presence. He went to the toilet as Colt could only sit there, diverting her gaze as to not stare. This was awkward enough. It was not until he had finished his business and got as big a fright as she had gotten. After a hurried apology, he raced off.
“Hey!” she growled, frustrated that her privacy had been compromised (even though it was her own fault for forgetting to shut the door.) Putting the bottle down, she sprang to her feet, forgetting that she had not dried off the bottom of the Nike attached to her prosthetic, so when she went for the door, it caused her to slip. Colt fell against the door-frame, feeling a hard pain through her shoulder. The ex-Marine gripped her shoulder as she tried to get back up, cursing up a storm.
Managing to get herself upright, Colt breathed heavily from the shock of the fall, needing to lean on the door-frame for support, leaning on her now bad shoulder no less.
“Did-did,” she hiccoughed, “Didn’t yer da teach ye to KNOCK first?”
---
As the man was leaving all that could be heard was the booming and collapse of Colt. He turned around to her groaning and trying to act as tough as always. He went over and help her up. “Here...I didn't know you were in here! Didn't your dad teach you to lock the door?” He said and noticed the pain she was in. He sighed. “Here let's go to my room, you need to lay down.” he helped her through the hallway and to his room where he closed the door not wanting anyone to know what happened.
He sat her on the bed and helped prop her up with some blankets and pillows. “There is that better? Just try not to put too much weight on your shoulder.” He looked into her eyes a moment before quickly diverting them again. Looking at her just made him more disappointed in himself.
---
“Fuckin’...” she grabbed the bottle where she had dropped it, “Smartass.” she added, though she was a little surprised when he helped her, saying that she had to lie down. Colt wanted to deny it but at this point, she might as well have been floating on air with how light headed she felt.
“I’m fine. Dandy.” she tried to resist but clearly failed as she was now sitting on the man’s bed as he propped up her shoulder. She watched as he looked her in the eye for a few minutes before he glanced away. Despite her state, she noticed that he seemed rather bothered about something. She took a drink from the bottle before frowning a little.
“Somethin’ wrong?” she asked. Why she was asking was beyond her, “Y’all seem distracted.”
---
He ignored her ramblings until she pointed out him seeming distracted. He blinked and looked at the ground blinking a few more times. “I...Dont know what you are talking about.” His voice was gone of emotion, what would she care? Why would she act like she cares now? Bet all she's really worried about is Owen, that's who was important to her throughout the whole scavenge. That's when he muttered to himself.
“I shouldn't have went with you... That was a mistake, i should have stayed here.” Is all he managed to let out, it was silent but she should have been close enough to hear.
---
Colt frowned as she heard him muttering something under his breath, saying that he should have stayed put and not come. Her head shot up and she stared at him with an expression that could only be described as a mix of frustration and disbelief.
“The fuck ya sayin’? I guess tellin’ us how to get out that gunshop and ‘elpin’ me with them Hazzies, stoppin’ us from being ripped apart is a mistake then?” she tried to keep her voice angry but her words were floaty and slightly jumbled, but she was dead serious in her words, “Ya sayin’ I’m stupid or somethin’ for picking ya?” How else was she supposed to take that?
---
He still didn't stare at her and just grit his teeth. “Of course I'm glad i helped you... Of course, I am... I just didn't want anyone to die…” he then turned and faced her with an expression of irritation. “Why did you choose now to try and care...?” He paused a moment. “You miss him don't you? Heh I'm surprised you didn't follow him when he left.” He didn't know what else to say but he kept it bottled inside all this time he just wanted to be an asshole and let all his feelings out...so he did.
“I'm such a fucking...uggghh…” he looked away from her again. “Colt... I don't wanna keep going... I don't see the point…” he chuckled. “Like look at how weak i am just from you hanging out with Owen, what use am i if I'm not okay mentally?” He looked back at her again his eyes beginning to water as he was fighting his tears from appearing.
---
Colt was taken aback at what he said, “The fuck ya on about? Nobody died!” she protested in confusion. He then asked her why she even cared now, “Wait- Who’s sayin’ I don’t-!?” she was interrupted again as he then began to ramble on about how she probably missed ‘him’. What was he talking about? Owen? Why was he so concerned about her interacting with Owen? What had she done?
“Miss- I want him back alive!” she answered bluntly, not appreciating his tone. What was he even trying to say?! None of this made sense! She only stopped feeling so angry and confused when he then said something that Colt herself was only too familiar with. The thought of not wanting to go on. Wanting to give up. But, she was still thoroughly confused by his reasoning.
“Wait a minute…” Her head tilted to one side, not having the real strength to keep it straight, “Y’think I… love Owen or some shit?” her eyes narrowed, honestly she could barely understand what he was saying. Was she hearing this right or was she just more drunk than she had thought? Colt shook her head a little as she took on more wine, still trying to make sense of it.
---
“Yes... Something like that, don't act like you don't like him... You stayed around him the whole trip...I'm such a dumbass... I shouldn't have kissed you before... I could have just tried harder…” he felt like he was being too emotional but nothing really ever went right for Marcus, especially with dating, no matter what he did he always seemed to fuck up. Maybe he just tried too hard. He glanced over at his pistol and picked it up starting at it a moment.
“I'm being stupid... I shouldn't have said anything... Especially when you are drunk... You are definitely confused... Fuck…” he just tucked his knees in, he was being such a child.
---
“Marcus… What the fuck are ya talkin about?” Colt’s bottom lip hung in disbelief as to what she was hearing, “I-I like- I hardly know him! How the fuck am I supposed to like him?! Well… I do, but as in, I think he’s reliable! Not like love!” she was honestly unable to understand what he was talking about, the world was coming to an end, they were at risk of being attacked every second, and he was worried that she might be in love with someone? She looked at the gun in his hand and frowned.
“Give me that.” she reached a hand out for the weapon, “I just don’t understand how ya came to that conclusion. You think I’m some floozie? Fallin’ over every man I meet?” she added. She could not help but feel somewhat insulted by the insinuation.
“So, if it bothers ya that much, how do ya feel about me?” she asked him, her eyebrows still furrowed as her wine sodden mind struggled to understand all of this. He’d have to make it explicit.
---
“I...Ya i know... I just... I guess that's like me hardly knowing you yet I kissed you... I shouldn't have done that, I should have tried to handle the situation differently.” He didn't realize she felt insulted. Guess it makes sense why but at the same time she's only really seemed like she had an interest in two guys, him and Owen.
“N-no... I just feel like he's done more for you and you took a liking to him more... I'm honestly just stupid for making this a priority over survival... Its just what if i never get the chance to actually date someone, especially someone like you Colt, you are strong, you are pretty damn smart even for being drunk 90 percent if the time, and you have gun skill... What if i die before that?” he thought for a moment then she took his gun away. “Calm down, I was just looking at it. I wasn't gonna do anything.” He felt like a real idiot, next time just keep your mouth shut Marcus.
She asked how did he feel about her and he jumped up, i mean he technically already confessed to her how he felt but he may have been too vague. “I like you... And i want a chance to be with you. This definitely isn't the right time to think about that but that's just how I feel. And I guess if you mean anything else I basically already commented you on what i liked about you so... Ya”
---
Colt sighed and took on some more wine as he talked more. He seemed to be coming to his senses about the whole thing. When he mentioned kissing her, she made a grumbling noise in her throat and looked away for a second.
“Call me a dummy but I thought ya was just tryin’ to snap me outta that.” she rubbed the back of her head. This whole thing was new for Colt, or at the very least unfamiliar.
“Hmm… Well… At least yer being fuckin’ honest with me now.” she said, in a tone that was a mix of understanding but also a tinge of disappointment. Why didn’t he say anything before? Even though Colt thought the whole thing to be ridiculous, he was under her command so she would at the very least have liked a heads up.
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“I mean... I was but I was more preparing to die to be honest with you heh... Lets just say my luck with getting females isn't the greatest so I at least wanted... That before I was gone ya know? But we all survived...for now so it all feels weird. Like I made a mistake and that you didn't really enjoy the kiss as much as I did.” He chuckled nervously but the direction of her eyes insisted that she actually died enjoy the kiss a bit. He gave a slight eyebrow raise.
“I mean it's not like I wasn't honest with you before. Anyway, mind if I ask...did you actually enjoy it? Just wondering if my skill on reading emotions is good or not.” He finished continuing to look at her.
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“Hm. Evry’dy was.” she shrugged, going to drink more wine but realised she was empty, with a huff of annoyance, she got the beer bottle she had taken with her. She pulled the top off as he then explained how he felt about the kiss, expressing the now awkwardness of the situation since they hadn’t been killed like they had expected to, “I mean…. It wasn’ like- bad or nuffin.” she rubbed the back of her neck, she really did not know what to say that would upset the man.
“I jus’,” she burped into her fist, “I dunno whatto thin’. I mean… I’ve not know whatto thin’ for a loooong time.” she sighed, taking a sip from the beer. At this point her eyes were unfocused and her stomach had bloated from the alcohol, a regular occurance for Colt so she was unfazed.
“Yer… no’ a bad kisser, I’ll go’ ya that.”
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He gave a nod and smiled a bit at her complimenting his kissing skills, kinda sad that he would feel happier because of that but considering what he's been through before this was a big plus. “Thanks, I appreciate that... Well umm... That was it I suppose but do you mind me asking why is it you drink so much? I always assumed it was because of you being in the military but if like to know for sure... Sorry if it's personal.” He didn't want to get too much into her business but she drank literally every second of the day, there was no way she would be living that long if she kept going.
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Colt frowned a little and she glanced at the ground as she listened to him asking about her drinking. She was unsure as to what to do or say about it. She had not talked to anyone about it. Colt blinked a few times as she tried to think of what to answer him.
“I dunno… Just, helps I guess. I mean, today. Just today.” she said with a sigh, “I mean, it’s no’ like it’s a problem or nothin’. Stressful day ‘n all. Could say it was that bu’ I dunno.” she tried to explain the best she could, despite repeating herself. She took a long drink from the beer. Her mind was still swimming with everything that happened this day. She just could not shake any of it off.
“Couldn’ even git ‘im his fuckin’ cigarettes right.” she grumbled, that was the cherry on the top.
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“ I mean it had to have happened before today...iIts like you live off of drinking. You breathe liquor.” He chuckled at his statement before stopping. “Heh, sorry. Anyway, point is, you shouldn't lie, I understand your frustrating from today but even before we knew about this apocalypse you were drinking already, we did go to your apartment you know...so evidence is there.” He explained. “I seen your name was Colette... Its a beautiful name... I hope you don't mind if i call you it from time to time.”
He then seen she felt guilty for her actions today. “And I see that the performance of everyone including yourself today wasn't the best but Colette... No one is perfect... Guess that's a lesson I need to learn too but the point is, we got out safety and we all just met each other. We did well today and no one died. Now, do you really think thays something to be upset about? Of course you will say, 'oh but Marcus I almost got everyone killed and I'm a horrible leader' but at the end of the day we all counted on you and you brought us back safely with a hell of a lot of supplies and not to mention you just saved more people and brought them in here to help them survive. So if anything you far passed the mission, you are a superhero.” He explained.
---
“Well… I jus’ like it.” she said with a shrug. But as he then mentioned her full name, the woman froze. Collette? Did he seriously just say that? She gulped slightly, “Uh-Um, well, uh-” she spluttered a little. It felt almost alien for it to be said. There was a reason she had always introduced herself as Colt. Collette did not exist anymore. That woman was gone. She was killed back in Afghanistan in that tank. The ex-Marine gulped anxiously and stammered a little, unsure how to react.
“N-No, I… I don’ mind.” she said as she glanced around anxiously before taking on more beer. He then attempted to reassure her that her actions today were not as bad as she had thought. She shut her eyes tightly for a few moments.
“If I jus’ kept ev’ryone straight, n’body would be hurt, Owen wouldn’ be missin’ and I wouldn’ have ‘urt that girl.” she sighed, still struggling to process it all.
---
He sighed, all of this really wants all that bad considering how it really should have went. “Colette wanna hear what a bad job would have been? We would have been trapped in the shop still and we would have had at least two of us die then we would have got to that Motel and guess what? More of us would have died probably only bringing back three people at the most. And Owen just said he needed to get something, if anything even though i hated him i know for a fact he's gonna come back. He isn't as badly hurt as some of the other people like Ivan. He will be fine since he has Andy to live for, hey maybe he even sees this little group as some sort of family. Anyway be thankful for the good that's happened and don't focus on the bad too much. People can always improve, don't you believe that? I mean I doubt you were always this hardcore before joining the military and in in good and bad ways it changed you. Just have faith.”
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Colt listened to him as she looked at her feet. She glanced back up at the man as he described how badly it could have gone. She sighed heavily.
The woman flinched a little as he called her Collette again. Something about it just felt wrong. Nobody called her that, not at least for the last ten years. Even her superiors would call her by her given nickname. As he then mentioned the military, she looked down.
“Hmmm…” she rolled up the cargo pants of her left leg, looking at the titanium limb, “Wouldn’ call this ‘hardcore’” she huffed.
---
“I meant you as a person is hardcore that doesn't have much to do with you missing a leg... And if anything try to thing positively about that, in this situation hell you could have a fucking shotgun for a leg and still be badass. Just know Colt that everyone here respects you. Everyone here likes you... Well except the girl you knocked out but ya anyway people look to you for advice and everything. Can you please trust me? At this point I wouldn't lie to you, I already expressed my feelings to you so that should maybe mean something towards my truth.” He said looking away a bit still feeling nervous about it.
---
She listened as Marcus assured her that there were still some good things to focus on. With a deep sigh, she finished off the beer with a belch before putting it on the floor. At this point she was beginning to feel rather faint. She looked at the man as he mentioned the girl she had knocked out. She groaned and put a hand on her head.
“Ugh… Andy’s mad at me about that.” she remembered, “Fuck,” she added. What else could she have done? Left her there? The woman looked up again as Marcus asked her to trust him. She blinked and looked down once again, scratching the back of her head.
“I guess,” she sighed, “I guess thats true.” she responded before letting out a long and loud yawn. But she could not sleep! She still had things to do! With a slight snort, she tried to get back up, intending to check on everyone and if Owen was back yet. If not, she was going to look for him.
---
“Yea probably but she will get over it, you need to rest though, you have had a long day, you hurt your shoulder, and you are far past drunk.” He explained. “Just stay and in the morning we will make sure you eat and drink lots of water so at least your hangover won't be as bad. Just let me take care of you I guess…” he offered hoping she would see that he was right even in her state.
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Colt, despite trying to get up, fell back against the bed with a long huff. She grumbled something under her breath before listening to Marcus as he tried to get her to stay put. She sighed heavily, flopping her head against the pillow.
“I’m no’ hungry.” she sighed, though that was a total lie, it was now at least three days since her last proper meal, and at this point, her stomach was not letting her forget that fact. She huffed through her nose, “...Wa’er sounds good though.” she said finally, staring up at the ceiling.
---
He raised a brow, she was beginning to not be able to handle her liquor. “Heh, Colette... I think the liquor is finally hitting you hard, it only took a whole day.” He chuckled at her. “Just get some rest and I'll get you food and water in the morning alright?” He reassured her as he laid back on the bed feeling just as tired as her but he wouldn't sleep, not yet anyways. He just relaxed and held Colt slightly close since she seemed to be in an uncomfortable position.
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Colt didn’t respond to that. She continued to stare at the ceiling. She let out a sigh and shut her eyes. She could hardly keep them open at this moment. She felt Marcus hold onto her, but it felt somewhat nice, despite the fact that she did not want to sleep, she started feeling herself drifting.
“‘Kay…” she sighed with a yawn, “Yer right.” she added as she started drifting to sleep even though her instincts told her to stay awake. She looked at the man through her eyelids as she struggled to think of what to say or do. It was probably the drink, but for whatever reason, she leaned over and gave Marcus a very slight, very quick peck on the cheek, hardly touching him before she turned around to face the other direction.
“Hmmm… I’ll still need t’ find Owen…”
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Marcus yawned and his eyes opened wide as she kissed his cheek, he looked over at her but she quickly faced the other direction as she laid her head on him. He gave a slight smile and gently combed her hair with his fingers. “Hey, if he's not back tomorrow I'll go with you to go find him ‘after’ you eat breakfast but I'm sure he will be fine.” He finished with but she was already long gone in her slumber, he wasn't tired anymore but more so excited that things between them seemed to be working out a bit more.
