Cello.
We are going to trust the giant flying sharks?
Huh ive never had it but sounds awesome
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salem.
inactive, hiatus
w o a h
Knight boi
‘Boo.’
Wtf is apple water tho-
salem.
inactive, hiatus
Water
apple
ach1lles
doomed by the narrative
“Alright, alright, that’s what I’m talking about!”
A crystalline shot glass slams down onto the table next to you, Crane laughing in drunken delight.
“Take a shot with me, won’t ya?”
The spirit shoves another glass towards you, and you stare at the amber liquid sloshing against the sides of the glass. You’ve never been one to drink, and you’re not keen on changing that resolution tonight. And though Crane was a light-weight, it was by the nature of your kind that the alcohol would wear off quick, so you really weren’t missing out on anything.
Besides, it would help if at least one of you kept your wits about.
“No thanks.”
“No fun!” He takes the shot glass and downs it. “The Shan-Hwang has the best drinks in Aoki-Daja, and here you are, insisting on staying sober!”
Hell yeah, paragraph breaks! (Excerpt taken from one of my WIPs.)
A crystalline shot glass slams down onto the table next to you, Crane laughing in drunken delight.
“Take a shot with me, won’t ya?”
The spirit shoves another glass towards you, and you stare at the amber liquid sloshing against the sides of the glass. You’ve never been one to drink, and you’re not keen on changing that resolution tonight. And though Crane was a light-weight, it was by the nature of your kind that the alcohol would wear off quick, so you really weren’t missing out on anything.
Besides, it would help if at least one of you kept your wits about.
“No thanks.”
“No fun!” He takes the shot glass and downs it. “The Shan-Hwang has the best drinks in Aoki-Daja, and here you are, insisting on staying sober!”
Hell yeah, paragraph breaks! (Excerpt taken from one of my WIPs.)
GrieveWriter
U-Incorporated 2nd Class Type Unit
Its literally exactly what it sounds like
Apple flavored water
Apple flavored water
ach1lles
doomed by the narrative
Apple-flavoured water! Think of La Croix, but it actually tastes like something (and without the fizz.)
Firelie
WHERE AM I? IS THIS WENDYS?
Thats some shit I was never goddamn taught
salem.
inactive, hiatus
That actually looks better Than the usual paragraph shizz!
Knight boi
‘Boo.’
Thats not legall
GrieveWriter
U-Incorporated 2nd Class Type Unit
Firelie
WHERE AM I? IS THIS WENDYS?
CRY ABOUT IT
Cello.
We are going to trust the giant flying sharks?
That was amazing Achilles hell I wish I could write liek that- Ill start trying to after this damn post-
Firelie
WHERE AM I? IS THIS WENDYS?
I used to be good at formatting, then I transferred to discird for RP for a couple years and that place is LAWLESS
Cello.
We are going to trust the giant flying sharks?
I rp on a game where paragraph breaks are non existent.
ach1lles
doomed by the narrative
Well, now you know! It looks better, and it's way easier to keep track of dialogue, especially in fast-paced one-on-one discussions. Correct usage (though I would hardly call my writing correct) can also create beats in story-telling, which can help drum up suspense. (Further excerpt bellow-)
“Ah, the shimenawa?” The man’s lip twitches, suppressing a frown. “Beautiful thing, isn’t it? But really, I think you should be going.”
“What do you mean? From this place?”
“You’re travellers, are you not? It is in your best choice to leave Aoki-Daja.” The glasses clink in his hand. “Have you sensed it?”
“... No. I have not.”
“Forgive me for asking, wanderers wouldn’t understand.” The man looks up. “The shield is failing. The shimenawa is falling into disrepair, and without it, the city won’t be protected for much longer. Some spirits have already started to flee. I recommend you to do the same.”
“Disrepair? Surely a goddess wouldn’t allow such her boon to reach such a state of shame-”
“Lei Jin is gone.”
“... What?”
“It’s been over 100 years since her last appearance, 113 in this town. We suspect that she has fled to the capital—or to some other place that isn’t so far out.” A bitter smile grows on the man’s face. “Aoki-Daja has been left to the Hounds. The Goddess has abandoned us, and the town won’t live much longer without her care. Her shrine is in shambles, and the maidens have no means of fixing it. The rest of us are waiting, I suppose. Waiting for the shimenawa to snap, to decay, for the barrier to fall.”
“I don’t understand. Why don’t you flee, as well? It seems like there’s still time-”
“You don’t understand.”
“...”
“Aoki-Daja has been a home for us spirits, and for most of us, it’s the only home that we’ve ever known. We have taken care of it, and it has taken care of us. To leave the town behind would be to leave behind our pasts, the bonds and the words that we’ve woven. And who do you become, when you lose your past?” The smile seems mournful now, to be quickly replaced by a pleasant one. The conversation, though it had the tone of an eulogy, was over.
“Anyways, I hope the wine was to your liking. Would you like a refill?”
You see, using paragraph breaks and pauses before crucial information, or high impact emotional scenes allow the suspense to build up. This is also why I tend to pepper my writing (really, more than I should) with things such as "..." or sudden stops like "-." If you don't overuse them (like me), and place them in the right places, you can create engaging dialogue that can make the scene play out in front of your eyes.
(SORRY FOR THE BIG RANT AGAIN, I'M JUST REALLY EXCITED AND HYPER-)
“Ah, the shimenawa?” The man’s lip twitches, suppressing a frown. “Beautiful thing, isn’t it? But really, I think you should be going.”
“What do you mean? From this place?”
“You’re travellers, are you not? It is in your best choice to leave Aoki-Daja.” The glasses clink in his hand. “Have you sensed it?”
“... No. I have not.”
“Forgive me for asking, wanderers wouldn’t understand.” The man looks up. “The shield is failing. The shimenawa is falling into disrepair, and without it, the city won’t be protected for much longer. Some spirits have already started to flee. I recommend you to do the same.”
“Disrepair? Surely a goddess wouldn’t allow such her boon to reach such a state of shame-”
“Lei Jin is gone.”
“... What?”
“It’s been over 100 years since her last appearance, 113 in this town. We suspect that she has fled to the capital—or to some other place that isn’t so far out.” A bitter smile grows on the man’s face. “Aoki-Daja has been left to the Hounds. The Goddess has abandoned us, and the town won’t live much longer without her care. Her shrine is in shambles, and the maidens have no means of fixing it. The rest of us are waiting, I suppose. Waiting for the shimenawa to snap, to decay, for the barrier to fall.”
“I don’t understand. Why don’t you flee, as well? It seems like there’s still time-”
“You don’t understand.”
“...”
“Aoki-Daja has been a home for us spirits, and for most of us, it’s the only home that we’ve ever known. We have taken care of it, and it has taken care of us. To leave the town behind would be to leave behind our pasts, the bonds and the words that we’ve woven. And who do you become, when you lose your past?” The smile seems mournful now, to be quickly replaced by a pleasant one. The conversation, though it had the tone of an eulogy, was over.
“Anyways, I hope the wine was to your liking. Would you like a refill?”
You see, using paragraph breaks and pauses before crucial information, or high impact emotional scenes allow the suspense to build up. This is also why I tend to pepper my writing (really, more than I should) with things such as "..." or sudden stops like "-." If you don't overuse them (like me), and place them in the right places, you can create engaging dialogue that can make the scene play out in front of your eyes.
(SORRY FOR THE BIG RANT AGAIN, I'M JUST REALLY EXCITED AND HYPER-)
ach1lles
doomed by the narrative
Mhm, you just have to fall in with the right crowd. The whole reason I actually started using em dashes and other ways to format my writing was because of one Discord server that I used to be in. It was definitely a really advanced RP, way more advanced than 13 year-old me could handle, but because the people there were so genuinely nice, encouraging and downright brilliant authors, I managed to improve my writing quite a bit. A lot of my stuff today is still influenced my them, especially the descriptions that I use.
ach1lles
doomed by the narrative
ANYWAYS- THAT WAS WAY TOO MUCH INFORMATION ABOUT ME AND GRAMMAR. HOW ARE Y'ALL DOING?
Cello.
We are going to trust the giant flying sharks?
Alot of my writing has improved from RPN mainly from these rps of Danis. AND IM DOING AMAZING AND THANK YOU FOR THE BIG LESSON
Knight boi
‘Boo.’
Wait Artemis is trying to forget about Josiah roght or she strwight up hid it and never thought about it?
salem.
inactive, hiatus
I usually rped in animal jam and club penguin, then I got into other sites like Flight Rising and Furvilla, and now im here.
Cello.
We are going to trust the giant flying sharks?
straight up hid it/never thought about it.
I also used to rp on animal jam.
I also used to rp on animal jam.
Firelie
WHERE AM I? IS THIS WENDYS?
I can see where that can get confusing in an RP like CCFA because people often make conversation like
Person 1:
“Topic A”
“Topic B”
“Topic C”
Person 2
“Address Topic A”
“Address Topic B”
“Address Topic C”
“Topic D”
and so on so forth, so it can get a little confusing when you use paragraph breaks like that since its meant to simulate realistic conversation, and the RP is not formatted like realistic conversation.
Knight boi
‘Boo.’
WAIT WHAT ABOUT FAE
She had to have at least some survivor guilt about it right?
Cello.
We are going to trust the giant flying sharks?
EHHHHH NOT REALLYYYY
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