Fantasy Freelancer Files (Red vs. Blue)

[TheAncientCelt]

[QUOTE="Shadowborn Omen]At what point did I say that I was going to have any sexual relations with these people?

[/QUOTE]
. . .Uh. . .

 

[1stLt HChurch]

I'd say go with your cousin, Shadow. If she is nice, anyway.


 

. . .Uh. . .

You nasty, TAC.


 
Oh, and I've seen that you have found the thread, @Agent Iceland.

 

[TheAncientCelt]

There is a new member here? God, how am I going to think of a nickname for them? There are so many people here already!


And I am just revealing the truth. Nothing wrong with what I am doing, it's what Shadow's going to do that's wrong!

 

[Wintermute]

No, Centy. You are wrong to discriminate. Whats the problem with Shadow committing incest? Yeah its totally sick, but I eat my biology practice calf heart raw because It looked yummy. Let Shadow live his life!

 

[Shadowborn Omen]

@1stLt HChurch If by nice you mean when I tell her my girlfriend broke up with me the first thing she asks is "can I fight her now?" then yes, she's nice.

 

[Wintermute]

Just kidding guys, just kidding. Also, I found a pretty badass song and I'm gonna include the lyrics. (RvsB song of course)

Spoiler

oklahoma beat down


pennsylvania dead and drown


minnesota castigate


massachusetts flagellate


bitch slap tennesee


dc dead see?


utah is a fucking mess


oregon in great duress


maryland is on her knees


louisiana? bitch....please.


mississippi worst day ever


north dakota not much better


missouri in a stranglehold


montana's corpse is getting cold


bleeding time for old kentucky


indiana not so lucky


vermont could use a four leaf clover


new jersey it is almost over


pick up delaware and slam her


call the meds for alabama


michigan has been destroyed


ditto that for illinois


new hampshire should have brought a friend


west virginia's at her end


colorado crash and burn


kansas point of no return


georgia's underneath a bus


california's really fucked


idaho and south dakota


give it up your time is over


nebraska cancel all appointments


washington we've got your ointments


ohio don't stand a chance


wyoming needs a change of pants


rhode island you cannot not surmount


puerto rico -does that even count?


pummel down on carolina


connecticut you're SUCH a whiner


arkansas eat my dust


alaska is a total bust


you can screw nevada


mess with maine


leave hawaii in a puddle of pain


you can beat virginia till she's down on the floor


but if you fuck with tex


if you fuck with tex


if you fuck with tex you'll be on your knees for sure


MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!

Thats not the whole song, but I'll add it.


 
Oh your states will be there, all states are there. Now, what isn't here are you guys. Where the hell did you all go?


Wait, dont say it: Lives

 

[Shadowborn Omen]

That's an aggressive song.


I'm not sure what "Oklahoma beat down" entails, but if it ends up with Oak on the ground, no.


Nebraska cancelling appointments can go multiple ways. I just want to say she goes to the dentist on a regular basis and isn't a prostitute.

 

[Wintermute]

Ah there you are. Yeah, and Massachusetts got flagellated ;-; Thats like some fifty shades of gray shit.

 

[TheAncientCelt]

New Jersey? As in my agent, or the state? Because either are on the brink of destruction.

 

[Wintermute]

xD

 

[MockingXbird]

...I'm gone for an hour and I'm shipped with Dark. Fine. I'll be the black widow or a praying mantis of the relationship. I will end up eating you =w=

 

[TheAncientCelt]

So there is a relationship?!

 

[Wintermute]

Nu-uh, not unless I eat you first. I'm a highly trained carnivore robot. Remember, I eat burritos for a living...

 

[MockingXbird]

Bring it fucker OAO *le feathers*

 

[Shadowborn Omen]

So, relationship confirmed? Just, really aggressive and controlling relationship based on who can eat the other first? (Ew.)

 

[TheAncientCelt]

Is that. . In a sexual way? Or legit biological reproduction way?

 

[Wintermute]

*Grabs a burrito* Bring it, you shisno!

 

[Shadowborn Omen]

Is that. . In a sexual way? Or legit biological reproduction way?

You tell me, CTAC, you tell me.


 
Are they cannibalistic insects or not? I don't know.

 

[MockingXbird]

FOR NARNIAAAAAAA *FEATHER AND LAZER ATTACK*

 

[Wintermute]

FOR TACOOOOOOS *Slaps with burrito* TAKE THAT YOU SHISNO

 

[Shadowborn Omen]

Ew. Dark, don't slap her with your burrito in public. That's fucking disgusting.

 

[Wintermute]

Bruh, your really going to do that to me? Really?


 
I'm going to rip out your heart and eat it with your shisnos shisno, you son of a shisno shisno

 

[MockingXbird]

.....Fuck you Shadow. Dark, I think we need to kill some fuckers *grabs torture devices * Si?

 

[Wintermute]

Si. *Grabs battery and pincers* Lets get these fuckers. Lopez dos point o apprueva this mensaje.

 

[MockingXbird]

Bless you


OH SHADDOOOWWW~CENTYYYY~