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Fantasy Entrance to 'The Rift'

post order Is fine while everyone is together. I'm sure at some point we will split up and then one group should have to wait to continue their own arc until the rest have done so.


2-3 posts a day is comfortable for me.


A tip: its easier to post 3 times a day if you post more than a paragraph. You don't get bored waiting if you spend a lot of time on your post.
 
[QUOTE="Jet Valentine]"Our prize is our fucking lives" Jet said as he took out his other sword. "You guys just killed a god-like beast that I couldn't deal with because I'm not meant to fight gods, so have some pride and your lungs still breathing as the prize" Jet, for some reason, felt annoyed by the woman's stupidity. "Prize... Like if" He said with a hint of annoyance in his voice. "Now then... I'll be resting because all this monkey bullshit is fucking bullshit, next time you guys can fight while I do nothing like I just did" He'd yawn as he finished cleaning the blood off his sword. "Took at least 30 killer stabs and survived... What kind of world is this? I'm a human not a fucking giant monkey killer, why was I even warped here?" He'd whisper, with a cold, calm tone, almost appearing hostile. Soon enough, he'd close his eyes, he wasn't tired but he was surely annoyed.
@Thatonechillgirl

[/QUOTE]
Also I don't mean to be mean, but could you get any closer to being an extra edgey Mary Sue? I mean it's one thing to be a hardened spiteful man, but if you're only 16 an you're a tiny guy who weighs almost nothing, you can't be doing everything.


He's a leader-like (Laidback and Relaxed Quiet Fellow) kid with a brave heart, who isn't Mel Gibson. He has a knack for adventure and can't be inside something, he was left with trauma since he was tested on the lab. He's also very strategic about everything, a wrong move, to him, could cause death. He's also very straightforward, not scared to say what he thinks.


That totally doesn't seem like your character at all.


Has been modified to be Faster, Stronger, Smarter and he has more Stamina, too, than a normal human.


If he had all that and was like he perfect human, wouldn't you think he'd look like Captain America and not some scrawny kid? Plus those totally sound like powers to me.


I'm just saying that you're not perfect, and neither should your character.

Alphaius said:
Hmm I suppose but that's kinda gonna suck for me I'm currently bedridden due to a knee injury so I'm kinda on all day
:(
Click to expand...
Yeah, but it's going to suck for people who have things to do and lives to live.
 
It seems that a three posts per day limit would work. I'll implement it within the rules then. No one is against this right?
 
He doesn't have to look like Cap America, he was modified to be that, not to look like that, he was not made bulkier. Oh and he's annoyed, it's the 5th time he has been warped to a place out of nowhere, when he was just prancing minding his own business, don't you think he'd get a little annoyed by now? Don't you think he'd change? By this rate, he would be completely crazy. He needs to relax, not be fighting something he knows he can't beat, like a monster that took stabs to the back.


He also isn't the perfect human, he's better than a human, doesn't mean he's all-intelligent and all-powerful.


That's about everything I need to mention anyway, so there you have- Oh yea, Mary Sue. The famous OP Mary Sue, let me clarify who she is for you.


Let me then, explain the Mary Sue for you:


Okay, so you have a character. What? She's called Xyron Eridanir Feriroseka? Ummm... Ok, strange name. What? She has telepathy/pyrokinesis/telekinesis/electrokinesis/Molecular Control/Time powers/Space powers/Teleportation/All of the above? Oh, no. She wears a fluffy pink trench coat with violent streaks of red across it, has (totally natural) hair that flows in 17 different colors with various highlights, wears ankle-length skirts that she is still totally able to move about quickly in, and wears a cape? She has demon/vampire/warlock/angel/divine/holy one blood AND is the chosen one? She knows 14 different fighting style and can phase in and out of existence? She has an IQ of 9001, is the best chef in the world, can play all instruments (at the same time) and is the world's leading expert on everything from Alchemy to Zoology?


This is a Mary Sue. A very Unliked OC archetype. Why? Shes too perfect. There's a reason that there is a rule against this OC archetype. A Mary Sue is unbelievable, has no room to grow/develop, and tends to have terrible characterization. Lets not mention that shes basically Chuck Norris when it comes to solving conflicts. "Oh let me just turn around and BOOM! Problem solved."


Self-inserts aren't a bad thing. Its good for an OC to be somewhat like yourself. after all, how can you write a convincing OC if you don't have the same mindset, at some level, as that OC? However, Self-inserts come in two forms. The first, is the benign, author self-insert, where your character contains some elements of yourself as an individual. We like this. This is good. This is the self-insert that makes your OC awesome. Then there's the dreaded "Wish fulfillment" self-insert. The Wish-fulfillment self-insert is when you take a part of yourself and insert it into a character...then proceed to add in all the things that you wish you could be, all the powers you wish you could have. This is how a Mary Sue is born. Kill it, kill it with fire. Get it out of here. This is evil and bad.


Here, now do your comparison, I can wait.


P.S. Sorry if I sound like a douche, It comes naturally.
 
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[QUOTE="The Endergod]Also I don't mean to be mean, but could you get any closer to being an extra edgey Mary Sue? I mean it's one thing to be a hardened spiteful man, but if you're only 16 an you're a tiny guy who weighs almost nothing, you can't be doing everything.
He's a leader-like (Laidback and Relaxed Quiet Fellow) kid with a brave heart, who isn't Mel Gibson. He has a knack for adventure and can't be inside something, he was left with trauma since he was tested on the lab. He's also very strategic about everything, a wrong move, to him, could cause death. He's also very straightforward, not scared to say what he thinks.


That totally doesn't seem like your character at all.


Has been modified to be Faster, Stronger, Smarter and he has more Stamina, too, than a normal human.


If he had all that and was like he perfect human, wouldn't you think he'd look like Captain America and not some scrawny kid? Plus those totally sound like powers to me.


I'm just saying that you're not perfect, and neither should your character.


Yeah, but it's going to suck for people who have things to do and lives to live.

[/QUOTE]
You don't have to be a dick I already said I'd agree to the limit-.-
 
I know it was the last statement I was referring to I don't know how to shorten it yet technowledgy is not my forte
 
[QUOTE="Jet Valentine]He doesn't have to look like Cap America, he was modified to be that, not to look like that, he was not made bulkier. Oh and he's annoyed, it's the 5th time he has been warped to a place out of nowhere, when he was just prancing minding his own business, don't you think he'd get a little annoyed by now? Don't you think he'd change? By this rate, he would be completely crazy. He needs to relax, not be fighting something he knows he can't beat, like a monster that took stabs to the back.
He also isn't the perfect human, he's better than a human, doesn't mean he's all-intelligent and all-powerful.


That's about everything I need to mention anyway, so there you have- Oh yea, Mary Sue. The famous OP Mary Sue, let me clarify who she is for you.


Let me then, explain the Mary Sue for you:


Okay, so you have a character. What? She's called Xyron Eridanir Feriroseka? Ummm... Ok, strange name. What? She has telepathy/pyrokinesis/telekinesis/electrokinesis/Molecular Control/Time powers/Space powers/Teleportation/All of the above? Oh, no. She wears a fluffy pink trench coat with violent streaks of red across it, has (totally natural) hair that flows in 17 different colors with various highlights, wears ankle-length skirts that she is still totally able to move about quickly in, and wears a cape? She has demon/vampire/warlock/angel/divine/holy one blood AND is the chosen one? She knows 14 different fighting style and can phase in and out of existence? She has an IQ of 9001, is the best chef in the world, can play all instruments (at the same time) and is the world's leading expert on everything from Alchemy to Zoology?


This is a Mary Sue. A very Unliked OC archetype. Why? Shes too perfect. There's a reason that there is a rule against this OC archetype. A Mary Sue is unbelievable, has no room to grow/develop, and tends to have terrible characterization. Lets not mention that shes basically Chuck Norris when it comes to solving conflicts. "Oh let me just turn around and BOOM! Problem solved."


Self-inserts aren't a bad thing. Its good for an OC to be somewhat like yourself. after all, how can you write a convincing OC if you don't have the same mindset, at some level, as that OC? However, Self-inserts come in two forms. The first, is the benign, author self-insert, where your character contains some elements of yourself as an individual. We like this. This is good. This is the self-insert that makes your OC awesome. Then there's the dreaded "Wish fulfillment" self-insert. The Wish-fulfillment self-insert is when you take a part of yourself and insert it into a character...then proceed to add in all the things that you wish you could be, all the powers you wish you could have. This is how a Mary Sue is born. Kill it, kill it with fire. Get it out of here. This is evil and bad.


Here, now do your comparison, I can wait.


P.S. Sorry if I sound like a douche, It comes naturally.

[/QUOTE]
There's no real comparison t make, you're wholeheartedly right with everything you said. I was 100% in the wrong there and I apologize. I was extra, and I mean extra salty, about earlier, and I had no right to snap at you like that. Since then, I have made some food and calmed down quite a bit, and can now see how much of a douche I was being. I hope we can put this behind us and start anew.

Alphaius said:
You don't have to be a dick I already said I'd agree to the limit-.-
Click to expand...
Again, let me say sorry for saying that, I'm totally in the wrong here and I shouldn't have wrote that.
 
It's ok sorry for being so edgy I'm used to being very active and it sucks being stuck. Either way this rp will be most enjoyable,you will find Toruk to be relatively reasonable
 
Glad to see everyone getting along! Thanks to you guy's feedback I can make this RP much better than it would have been. More feedback would be great.
 
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Alphaius said:
It's ok sorry for being so edgy I'm used to being very active and it sucks being stuck. Either way this rp will be most enjoyable,you will find Toruk to be relatively reasonable
Click to expand...
Don't be sorry, and I feel you man. I dislocated my knee right before bad camp started this year, and I also had nothing to do.
 
Apology accepted.


Anyway... Young, a 3 day post limit sounds, good, I'll be a d-bag to you and say that I allow it, because I made the rules. > :)
 
[QUOTE="Jet Valentine]Apology accepted.
Anyway... Young, a 3 day post limit sounds, good, I'll be a d-bag to you and say that I allow it, because I made the rules. > :)

[/QUOTE]
Thank you. Also, I just realized that our characters are probably going to butt heads a lot. Like Riptide is just a laid back and calm dude who just goes with the flow and likes to resolve conflicts without violence and your character just like freaked out at someone and killed something in front of him.

Alphaius said:
And ate it
Click to expand...
That too.
 
Nah, Jet's dynamic, he'll change as the story progresses. Also, Jet did nothing in his eyes, he didn't get the kill, now he's all "God damn it, another one of those monsters I can't kill" But later down the line, I plan on maybe getting better gear for him, if that's possible. Maybe enchant his swords or something.
 
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