World gone mad (with Primal Things)

Angelina choosing to do anything at all voluntarily, let alone something as childish and simple as whistling, is unexpected to Jared, and he smiles, surprised and pleased, as well as appreciative of her efforts. But clearly Alina is still bothered by Peter's presence, by their exclusion of her in the decision to take him back with them. It is evident in her tone of voice, in her gestures and posture, and Jared studies her, his smile fading as he watches her work with Angelina's things.


He could understand her irritation. He wouldn't enjoy being left out of such a decision either, especially if he'd already been made to stay behind. Still, there was no way she could have been included. It wasn't like they had cell phones.


"I'm sorry," he said again after a few moments, his tone soft but sincere. "But we're okay. No one saw us, no one tried anything. The town was sort of empty, really. Maybe next time you can go."


Leigh has been watching Peter with something between interest and continued trepidation, not sure yet what she thinks about him. Generally any youngish boy would draw her best efforts at winning him over to her, but she has observed Alina's reaction, and her recent alliance with the older girl causes her to be more wary than she normally would be. She shrugs in reaction to his question.


"I don't know. What's skittish?" She moved closer to Ilya, even going so far as to touch his arm hesitantly, partly to remain closer to him than to Peter, partly because this is Leigh's usual mode with boys she has begun to "like." "I'm glad you came back. We missed you. I hoped you were okay."
 
Carefully, Alina folds the blankets and shirt to make them easier to tuck under her arm so as not to have to use both hands to cover them. She spares a quick glance at the cut on her palm before closing her fingers around it as best as she can and manages a weak smile at Jared.


"I'm just glad you guys are okay." She tries not to think about what she and Leigh had talked about while she was gone and fusses with the shirt she'd used as a bandage, making sure it was straightened out enough to let the sun and wind hit it all equally. "We all are."


--------


Since Peter doesn't seem interested in explaining to Leigh what skittish means, Ilya figures he may as well take it upon himself. "Just kind of nervous, really." When she touches his arm and expresses her relief that they're back, he smiles weakly and draws his arm back, giving her back a small pat. "I'm glad you guys are okay too. We weren't too happy about leaving you guys."


Letting out a breath, he starts to take things out of the bag and organize them at least a little. "Did you guys do anything?"
 
Jared notices the way that Alina is being careful with her hand and moves forward, extending his to take some of her load from her. "Here, I'll take it, your hand is hurt....you should let me look at that, Ali. We got some first aid stuff in the school, we should at least clean it up and bandage it better."


Again he doesn't notice his calling her Ali rather than the more formal Alina. As he begins to walk back with her to the others, he is taking his time, trying to delay their return to them, without letting himself really question himself as to why.


"Ali?" he blurts after a moment, and this time he does hear himself calling her that and clears his throat, looking away in case she sees the embarrassment flicker over his eyes before he looks back at her. "If you're worried about Peter...maybe we should make a plan. What would happen if it turns out we can't trust him."


**


"Oh," Leigh shrugs in reply to Ilya's explanation. "I'm not nervous. I'm pretty brave, I think. I don't get scared at scary movies and stuff. Even the really bloody ones. Angie couldn't watch them but I could."


She beams when Ilya pats her, taking this as a very, very positive sign, and trails close to him, right at his elbow as he starts to unpack. She tries to help him too, but she is so close to him she often knocks elbows and is more in the way than helping out.


"Wow, you guys got a lot of stuff...yeah, we played truth or dare," she said, then giggled, cutting her eyes to the side as she said in a whisper aimed at Ilya alone, "I know something about Alina that you don't know. Something about her and Jared."


She giggled again, shaking her head so her hair brushed him. "I can't tell you though! You would have to guess all on your own."
 
Though she won't admit it out loud, she likes the way the shortened version of her name sounds when Jared says it, and the smile is back. When he mentions her hand, she absently pulls it behind her back and shakes her head, "It's not that bad, really. I can clean it when we get back


As they walk back, she meets his pace easily, not thrilled to go back to where Peter is, and, thankfully, the urgency in Jared's voice - and use of her nickname - brings her to a halt. Ali watches him look away briefly and cocks her head, eyes brightening when he mentions having a plan. At least, on some level, she is being taken seriously instead of just getting brushed off.


"I think maybe we shouldn't arm him right away? It sounds really cruel, I guess, but... I mean, I think it's fair. He should have to show that we can trust him without weapons before we give him any, right?" Alina fires a quick glance in the direction of the campsite, concerned very briefly that she may be talking too loud and anxiously licks her lips. "Other than that... I mean, I don't know. Any ideas?"


--------


It's difficult not to let Leigh's closeness, and his constant bumping into her bother him or get on Ilya's nerves. Clearing his throat, he smiles weakly at her, "Yeah... we figured it'd be better to stock up for as long as we can. Do you think you can start going through the other bag? Maybe even see if there's anything that sounds good to eat tonight?"


His eyebrows raise at the mention of truth or dare and all movement stops when Leigh whispers about knowing something about Alina and Jared. She says it innocently enough, and Ilya knows that he shouldn't take his anger out on her, so he simply allows one hand to clench at his side.


What have they done together that Ilya isn't allowed to know about? Better yet, what are they out there doing now?


Had they not picked up a straggler that he still isn't sure about, he'd be stalking off into the woods to find out just then. But it can wait. Ilya is usually the one to wake Jared up at night so he can take his shift on watch, and it can happen then. He should talk to Ali about it too. He's not comfortable with this, by any stretch of the imagination.


"You can't even give me a hint?"
 
"No, I think that's a good idea," Jared nods, after considering Alina's suggestion for a moment. "I didn't hand off any weapons to him, you'll notice. I mean, with the rest of us, we all had other people with us, you know? Obviously we weren't any danger since we had kids with us. But he's alone...it's just...you can't be too careful."


He pauses, turning to face her as he considers their options, then decides, "We shouldn't let him take watch. Just in case. You and me and Ilya can switch off so someone will always know what he's up to. And we should never leave my sisters alone with him...or you."


He hesitates, then says quietly, "He's not that big, but he could still overpower you. You have to watch yourself."


**


"Oh, this stuff is good!" Leigh says with some enthusiasm as she pulls out a box of Dunkaroos, her eyes lighting up as she holds them out for him to see. "I didn't know they still made those, wow!"


She is still admiring the cookie box when Ilya asks her for a hint about Alina and Jared. Looking up at him, she cuts her eyes towards him in a teasing, flirty manner, deliberately prolonging the moment as she enjoys the sense of power this gives her to withhold information, rather than being the one information is withheld from, as usual.


"Welllll," she drew out the words, "I COULD just HINT, I guess...I COULD tell you that MAYBE Alina MAYBE feels a certain way about someone who isn't you or me or Angie...maybe...."
 
"I'd pretty much already decided I'd throw a fit if someone tried to let him take watch," Alina answers quietly, her face heating up a little in embarrassment. "So I'll back you on that one, for sure."


She hesitates, shifting onto the balls of her feet, already feeling embarrassed at the admission that she's been gearing up to throw another tantrum, but her preparation for what she has to ask next only makes it that much worse. "I uhm... I wanted to talk to you and Ilya about like, keeping me company when I watch. Not the whole time, I mean, just like... when you get me up for watch, maybe staying up for a while and then I can wake Ilya up when you go to sleep? Just for tonight, I mean, in case he wakes up."


It sounds so stupid to her, that she would be this paranoid about someone who would most likely sleep through the night anyway. But even Jared admits how easy it would be for Peter to take her out, if he isn't trustworthy.


"And I'll keep something on me. I usually do anyway." She looks up at him, lips twitching and gestures with the crowbar.


--------


Feels a certain way? So does that mean that they haven't done anything? Would Leigh know if they had? How much information can you get out of someone during truth or dare, anyway?


"So Ali has a crush on your brother?" Ilya asks, his eyebrows raising. "And we can have that for dessert, for sure." He tells her, diligently unpacking the bag. He doesn't want to seem too awfully paranoid, but he also doesn't want to use the girl's feelings for him to manipulate her into telling him anything. Though it would be effective, he certainly wouldn't want anyone to do that to Alina, and hurting Leigh like that is entirely out of the question.


"What about Jared?" He asks finally, "Do you know if he feels any way about Ali?"
 
Jared has to admit, hearing Alina admit that she would have been willing to throw a fit over making sure that Peter wouldn't watch over them, though it seems to embarrass her to say to him, actually increases his respect for her. She clearly has strong convictions, a strong sense of what she feels is right and wrong, and is willing to make herself look stupid or to create turmoil in order to make sure things go the way she thinks is best for them. Not everyone could do that; Jared wasn't sure he himself could, at least not in front of her, not deliberately.


Her next request seems to embarrass her as well, though Jared cannot understand why. It seems perfectly logical and reasonable to him, that she would not want to stay up alone. She is smaller than them, and wouldn't be much protection against any of them if Peter, or any other adult, decided to attack and took her by surprise. It made no sense for her to stay up alone.


"No, of course we can do that," he said quickly, reaching out to give her shoulder an awkward squeeze. "I get it. It's safer for two to be up too, anyway, you know? Watch each other's backs and everything."


**


This is the most that Ilya has talked to her, the most attention she's gotten from him, and the longest he's allowed her to stay near him since they've met, and Leigh can hardly believe her luck. Not only that, but her brother and Alina aren't even there watching, so she can totally, in her mind, at least, have a good chance to finally get him to really know how much he should like her. She revels in this position, unable to keep from smiling as she continues to draw out her information.


"Wellllll she looks at him a lot...I asked her a certain question about numbers and looking and being hot and her answer was HIGH....and I didn't ASK Jared but I think he looks at her a lot too. And he calls her Ali. Did you notice that, he calls her Ali like you do?"


She puts her hand on his back, coming close enough that he can almost feel her breath against him as she says quietly, "I think he thinks she's pretty...Ilya? Do you think...do you think I'm pretty too?"


**


Angelina Norwood had never been a child who dealt well with change.


It had been something she had to get used to fast, of course. She had never known, from the time she was born, what might be going on in her home any given moment, where she might live the next day, what "friends" of her mother might be coming through the door or whether or not her mother would be there that day at all. But that didn't mean she had dealt well with it. Her way before had been to whine or fuss or cling, to wet the bed or have nightmares and crawl into her sisters' beds when she was particularly upset or scared about a particular change. But this...all of this was too much for her to even begin to find words for, to even allow herself to begin to even try to comprehend. It was much easier to shut down, to try to put herself apart from it all, to simply believe to herself that it wasn't there.


But that was hard, very, and at moments like this, when she woke up in a forest, disoriented, with her brother nowhere in sight and a strange man who looked very much like a grown up to her standing nearby...this was more than Angelina could even begin to question out logically. And she was terrified.


Sitting up where she had been lying, she began to shriek, throwing her blanket back over her head and curling into a ball as if she could somehow keep herself from being seen by him, if she could not see him.
 
Of course he had noticed that Jared had called her "Ali", how could he not? This, Ilya decides, is a problem that he is going to have to rectify, and soon.


"I think he thinks she's pretty...Ilya? Do you think...do you think I'm pretty too?"


That's a question Ilya has no interest in answering. Of course he doesn't think she's pretty, she's twelve! Sure, she has the potential to be, but for him to think anything other than that is inconceivable and gross.


His wish for some sort of reprieve comes in the form of Angelina's discovery of their guest. At the sound of her scream, he flinches and looks over in her direction just in time to see her pull the blanket over her head, still screaming. Shooting to his feet, he bolts over to Angie and drops to his knees next to her, completely lost as to how to comfort her in any way. Carefully, he puts a hand on her arm.


"Angie? Angie, it's Ilya... listen, it's okay... he's going to hang out with us for a few days, that's all. His name is Peter." Nothing he says is working to calm the girl down though, and he looks helplessly at Leigh, unsure how to proceed.


--------


Alina allows herself the little bit of relief that comes in when Jared doesn't come right out and laugh at her request for someone to stay up with her. It's not that she expected him too, she'd learned fairly early on that he was too nice to really pull that kind of stunt, but still. If it had been Ilya, or one of her other siblings there would be a significant amount of teasing.


She's about to say something when she hears a soft wail coming from the direction of the campsite and she freezes, her back going rigid. Shooting a quick glance at Jared, eyes wide, she asks "did you hear that?"


When the wailing continued, she takes off at a sprint toward the camp, heart pounding against her ribs. She has no idea whether or not Jared is behind her, she just has to get to camp. She knew it. She f**king knew he was bad news. As much as she doesn't want to think it, as badly as she doesn't want to say that their judgment could be so horrible, she picks up the pace despite the screaming in her lungs, desperate to get there, to make sure that, had Peter decided to attack them, he hasn't harmed them enough to kill them.


Ali decides that, either way, whatever harm he's done, she'll kill him. If he's disappeared, she'll find him and kill him - track him the way they would a deer or a rabbit and tear his throat out.


Once she gets to the camp and sees that Peter has barely moved from where he was when they left, she allows a little more relief to come in. She sees Ilya crouched next to Angelina, who has burrowed under the blankets and is clearly having some sort of reaction to their new guest. But everyone is okay, at least physically, and Alina has nowhere to expend the adrenaline.


Her body shaking and lungs screaming for air, she migrates to where she'd stashed her inhalers and drops directly onto her bottom sucking back three hits of albuterol. Sitting there, with a death grip on her inhaler, Alina sets down the blankets and tries to block out the sound of Ilya's lame attempt to comfort Angie. She glances over at Peter, who is watching everything with wide-eyed amusement and takes another hit off of her inhaler.


"Pick her up or something, Il." Alina wheezes, "Touching her shoulder isn't going to fix anything if she's that scared."
 
Ilya's touch on her arm doesn't even register to Angelina's senses at first, and then, when she does understand that someone is touching her, it only frightens Angelina further. Someone is touching her, and she can't see who; it might very well be that new adult boy. He might be trying to grab her, trying to pull her up so he can kill her, and if possible, her screaming only increases in volume. She begins to thrash beneath the blanket, nearly flinging it off herself in her panic.


Leigh stands frozen behind Ilya, her eyes huge as she looks with anxiety between him and her sister. "Angie!" she says over her screams. "If you keep yelling like that someone might hear! Angie, stop it, stop!"


Of course her sister doesn't, and so Leigh comes forward, trying to touch her and calm her down. Angelina accidentally kicks her in the mouth, and Leigh yells too, scrambling backward holding her lip.


When Jared hears the screams begin, the adrenalized panic he feels is almost equal to Angelina's. Someone is screaming. One of his sisters is screaming, one of his sisters is hurt or afraid, and he had left them back there...left them back there with Peter, someone he barely knew at all. How could he have been so stupid? How could he have left them there? Peter could have killed Ilya and then who would protect his sisters?


Cursing under his breath, he grabbed Alina's hand, pulling her along with him as they ran so she wouldn't be separated. He can hear her gasping breaths and barely notices when she goes for her inhaler as they arrive, his eyes scanning the area with intense fear for Peter and his sisters. But he is confused to see that Peter has barely moved, that Leigh, though holding her mouth and on the verge of tears, seems otherwise okay. It is Angelina who is crying out, half hidden under a blanket, kicking her legs out at anyone who might come close.


Alina's words help clarify to him what must be going on, and Jared drops quickly beside her, struggling to pin down her legs as he talks loudly to her. "Angie, Angie, calm down. I'm back, I'm back. I'm sorry I left without telling you, I'm back. Calm down. It's okay, no one's going to hurt you, it's okay. That's just...it's okay, Angie, are you listening? It's okay?"


He had without thinking almost shoved Ilya out of the way to get to her, and now when her leg movements have become feeble, he picks her up as Alina had suggested, brushing the blanket off of her face and instead half wrapping it around her as he semi rocked her, instinctively using rhythm to calm her. After several minutes Angelina's breath begins to slow, though it is still ragged, and she opens her eyes again, staring at Peter with her thumb creeping towards her mouth. Still holding her, shaken himself by now, Jared tries to explain.


"That's Peter. It's okay. I won't let anyone hurt you, Angie."


From behind him, Leigh whispers, "She kicked me," but he ignores her for now.
 
Everything is total chaos... but what else is new? With her grip still on her inhaler, Alina stays clear out of Jared's way, wanting to help but also afraid that she would catch Angie's foot in the same way that Leigh did. When Leigh whispers that Angie had kicked her, Alina's eyes flit over to her and she realizes how shaken she is by what's happened as well. It's a relief, really, that she and Jared weren't the only ones who panicked when they'd heard Angelina's wails.


Shakily, still wheezing and gripping tightly on her inhaler, Alina walks to stand in front of Leigh and takes her wrist gently, "Let me see." Carefully, she draws her hand away and holds her chin between her thumb and index finger, trying to avoid where Angie's foot had collided with it and causing the girl more pain. It's already bruising, and a little swollen, and Ali knows it must ache horribly. "Il? Did you guys get any painkillers?"


Her brother doesn't seem to notice her, his eyes glued to Jared and Angie, wide and shining bright with fear. He may not look like it to the others, but just by the way his shoulders ever so slightly hunch forward, the way he keeps raising his hand to quickly pinch at the bridge of his noise the way he does when he's trying not to cry, Alina can tell that he feels just as, if not more, upset and worn down than she herself does. It actually surprises her how long he's been able to hold out... because he hasn't really appeared to hit his threshold yet, at least not in front of her. She's seen close to no emotional displays from him, which seems even more worrisome than if he had displayed several.


Even though Ilya is older, he should be allowed to have his weak moments too, and Alina's heart aches for him.


"Ilya!" She barks, a little more harshly than intended and immediately feels bad when he flinches and snaps his head in her direction. "Pain killers?"


His mouth opens, but nothing comes out other than a small croak. Snapping his jaw shut, Ilya clears his throat and nods, "Green duffel."


Alina walks over to the designated duffel and pulls out a bottle of tylenol. She struggles with the cap at first, the cut on her hand having already overstayed its welcome, made the act bothersome and more difficult than it should be. When it opens, she shakes two out and hands them to Leigh with a juice box, "Take these, okay?" She says softly. "It'll take a while for them to kick in, so we can go to the river and wet you a towel or something to hold to it, if you think the cold will help."


Not knowing what else to do after Leigh has taken the medicine, she wraps her arms around her and rests her cheek on top of her head, holding her as close as she thinks Leigh will let her. Ilya does not need immediate comfort, though he may want it, and can wait until the situation dies down with Leigh and Angie. Her good hand rubs the smaller girl's arm as she speaks softly, her eyes pinned to Jared and Angie, almost primed for another meltdown.


"It's gonna be fine, Leigh. Tomorrow, it'll be just like a bad dream, you know? Once everyone's awake and the tension sort of dies down... we'll be fine, I promise."


She doesn't necessarily believe it, but she hopes that she says it with enough conviction that Leigh might, at least for a little while.
 
Standing back apart from the others, her lip and chin throbbing with pain, Leigh tries to keep back the tears pricking her eyes, blinking several times. When Alina comes to her, gently examining her, and shows sympathy, in contrast to Jared's ignoring her, this makes it more difficult to continue to hold back, and she sniffles, biting her inner cheeks. She can tell that Alina is having a hard time breathing, and she stammers, "Are you okay? You sound..."


She trails off, her eyes shifting to Ilya, and as she continues to hold her hand against her injured spot lightly, she grows concerned over him as well, almost forgetting the ache of her chin and lip as she stares at him, stunned. She didn't think that boys, at least older boys, could react like that; she has yet to witness Jared react in such a manner, not where she would be able to see. He looks like he's about to cry, and she watches him with wide eyes, speaking his name in a near whisper. "Ilya?"


As Alina returns to her, giving her pills and then hugging her, Leigh hesitates, continually surprised by the older girl's kindness towards her, and then wraps her arms around her fiercely, a few tears escaping. She turns her head into her shoulder, careful to avoid her injured side, and whispers back to her, "This is scary...everything is so weird..."


Out his peripheral vision Jared noticed Alina taking care of Leigh and appreciates it distantly, but for now focuses on Angelina. She has stopped making any noise, sitting hunched in his lap with her thumb in his mouth, and he continues to rock her slightly, one hand cupping her head as he reaches out to grasp the first stuffed animal he can from their backs, closing his hand around the lion and putting it in Angelina's lap. She hugs it to her chest but doesn't move from him as he continues to speak to her in a low murmur. He can still feel her heart racing against his forearm, but her body is a little less tense against him, and he hears his own breath release in a shaky rush.


The stress of this would kill him if the adults didn't.
 
Ilya just stands there, having no idea what to do or who to go to first. With the exception of Peter, everyone else is in some state of shock or panic, including himself. Rooted to the spot, he swallows thickly and plucks at the bridge of his nose twice, once right after the other, and sucks it up. As badly as he just wants to explode - to cry and rage and hit things, it's not the right time, and wouldn't serve to fix anything other than make everyone else more upset.


How Jared is able to keep it together the way he is is a complete mystery to him, because Ilya is barely holding it together. He looks over at Ali and Leigh, who are hugging each other tightly, Ali speaking softly to Leigh words he can't hear and doesn't really care to.


Out of the corner of his eye, he finally sees Peter stand up and glances over to him. He's watching them with more interest than anything, though there is something at least a little panicked about his posture, which is the only thing that keeps Ilya from grabbing the nearest blunt object and just letting into him.


"Is there anything I can do?" He asks, meeting Ilya's eyes.


How the hell would he know?! He wants to retort. Does it look like he has any idea what to do right now other than stand here and feel helpless?! Clearing his throat again, Ilya shakes his head and just shrugs helplessly, "Let's just get some food around or something, yeah?"


Peter nods and mutters a quick "sure thing man" before walking with Ilya over to the bags. They start digging through the food they managed to get and pull out some peanut butter and bread. Peter pulls out some goldfish and juice boxes and they start preparing it as best as they can, trying to find at least some way to make themselves useful.


Alina is having considerably more luck than her brother. She keeps her arms tight around Leigh and rubs her back, trying to soothe herself as much as the other girl. It's selfish, why she does this really. She figured out not long after Jared and his sisters joined up with her and Ilya that being there to comfort and take care of them helped to make her feel more in control. It's a good outlet for her, to sort of be able to commiserate with them while still finding some way to help, especially since they're so young.


"I know it's weird," She says quietly, tightening her arms a little, trying to provide as much security as she can. "But maybe they'll even out a little, you know, and get more normal. It's just... it's hard for everyone right now is all."


She feels bad at this, truthfully. Alina, the baby of the family, has never really needed to do a lot of comforting. The best she can do is mimic what her siblings have done for her in the past, and even then, it's not like situations like this arose often when she was still the one who needed to be comforted. The comfort Ali mostly received was the result of break ups, or bad grades on tests...


She's out of her league, and she knows it.


"We're doing pretty good, though," She says after a long pause. "All things considered, I mean." When she finally hears Angie start to calm down, it's like her entire body lets out a huge sigh of relief and she could just start crying from that alone. "Maybe it won't be so scary one day."
 
"It's always going to be scary," Leigh whispered, one of her hands closing around the fabric of Alina's shirt as she leaned into her, closing her eyes. "The adults are all crazy and we have to live outside in the woods, and I never even liked woods. I used to be scared of snakes and bears and now I've got to be scared of people...it's never not going to be scary, Ali."


Still, she is calming down as Angelina is, hugging Alina close to her, and after a few more sniffling breaths she pulls away, going to help Ilya after a few self-conscious swipes at her face. She kneels beside him, quietly helping him get out food, and begins to set aside portions for each person on napkins. Jared watches, a solid lump forming in his throat, and cannot find words. Now that Angelina has calmed, and everyone is on somewhat shaky levels of calm, it seems that he himself has to guard against tears.


After a few minutes he gets to his feet, his muscles stiff and creaking protest, and hoists Angelina to his hip as he carries her over to the others. Sitting again with them, he takes portions for both of them, noticing when Angelina immediately scuttles over to Leigh, who is seated as far from Peter as possible, and presses against her, hugging her lion against her ribs. Leigh smooths a hand over her curls but otherwise doesn't react to her.


"I wish none of this was real," Jared said, and it isn't until he saw Leigh staring at him, biting her lip, that he realized he had said the words aloud.


(skip ahead to night, maybe?)
 
(sure thing)


Ilya leans back against the tree and runs his fingers through his hair. Alina is curled up asleep, breathing slowly and evenly just shy of a foot away from him. She had been able to hold herself together until Leigh, Angie and Peter had fallen asleep before she pressed her face into his stomach and wept in sheer exhaustion. He'd be lying if he didn't admit that he may have joined her briefly. Not so that anyone could have seen him, though. No, he'd leaned his head back against the tree and closed his eyes, allowing the tears to slid past his temples and into his hair. It hadn't lasted long, fortunately. He'd finished a long time before Ali had, one hand still rubbing her back trying to comfort her as much as he could.


After that, though, it was just quiet, and now, he may as well be alone for all of the company that he has. Even with Alina's breath as close as it is, he's the only one awake keeping watch with the mini louisville slugger resting on his lap. He hears crickets, and everyone breathing, and nothing else. Ilya realizes that now would be a prime time for him to just let the tears come now, instead of embarrassing himself when someone else is awake again, even though he's fairly certain that Jared or Ali hadn't noticed.


Heaving a deep breath, he repositions himself to get more comfortable, his tailbone having started to ache dully from the constant weight on it. It's been a few hours since he started keeping watch judging by the position of the moon. He has no idea how long it's been, though, and doesn't want to wake anyone up unless he absolutely has to. It would be Jared's turn next, but the guy's had a rough enough night that he could use a little extra sleep anyway.


Another hour and a half passes, and he can't keep his eyes open any longer, the fight long running out of him. Carefully, Ilya stands up and moves over to Jared, shaking his shoulder lightly so as not to scare him or have to dodge a flying fist or something. "Hey man," He begins softly, just loud enough for Jared to hear him. "It's your turn to take watch."
 
The day had started out rough enough, and it seemed that it couldn't end any easier than it had begun.


As the skies had begun to darken, both Angelina and Leigh had become more skittish, to use Peter's word, reluctant to leave the older children's sides or even to let go of them for more than a few seconds at a time. Angelina had not said another word for the rest of the day and night; it was as if simply being in Peter's presence had set her back the small space forward she had come, and she had no intention of revealing herself in any way against him. She had a difficult time going to sleep, though she didn't cry or fuss; instead she wrapped both arms around Jared's and hung on him, screwing up her face in a soundless protest when he tried to get her to sleep until he lay down beside her, rubbing her back until her breathing evened out and she at last seemed to settle in.


Leigh had been even more difficult. As the day came to a close, she had begun to talk more frequently and with more anxiety even than usual, beginning to catch at Alina's and Jared's and even Ilya's hands often, everything she said seeming to be put across in a whining tone that scraped at Jared's badly frayed nerves until he began to snap at her. This provoked her to tears, which lasted longer than Jared could bring himself to feel guilty for, and even an hour later, when she lay down to sleep after Angelina had already drifted off, he felt his whole body tense up with irritation before concern when she unexpected burst into tears again.


Jared had done what he could for her, going to her and sitting next to her, holding her hand and stroking her hair as she sobbed into the t-shirt she was using as a pillow, not seeming to even know or be able to put words to why, exactly, she was crying. When Leigh was finally down, and he was lying between both his sisters, listening to their slightly raspy breaths in sleep, he could hear Alina's tears start as well, soft as they were, and it seemed to him a hopeless cycle of misery he could not break out from. But as terrible as he felt, as empty and dark and hopeless as everything in the world seemed to him then, he could not cry. His eyes remained hot and dry behind his lids, and every bone of his body felt heavy and weary, entirely too much so to summon the effort for tears.


He wasn't sure when it was that he finally fell asleep, but it seemed no time at all before Ilya shook him awake. Sitting up with blurred vision, he rubbed at his eyes, clearing them to be able to see as he propped himself up to take his watch.
 
Ilya gives him an apologetic smile, the corners of his lips barely turning upward, hardly enough energy to manage it. Letting out a deep breath, he hands over the the bat and makes his way back over to his spot next to the tree. He knows full well that if Alina wakes up and he's not within reaching distance of her, she'll probably have another meltdown and he just doesn't have the energy to deal with it just then.


Laying down, Ilya pulls the blanket over himself and pillows his head on his arm, bending it beneath his head. He's grown way too used to sleeping on the ground by now, and while he's grateful for having adapted to his new surroundings so quickly, he still knows that in any other situation, he'd be missing his bed dearly.


Sleep, while it takes several minutes, slips in easily.


Peter, however, is still wide awake. It took a significant amount of pinching along the outside of his thigh to force himself awake for a while, but now, with the anticipation of striking, he doesn't need to hurt himself to stay awake. While Ilya had been watching, he'd occasionally opened his eyes, noticing that the boy, though tired, was just punchy enough to have a shot at taking him down should he strike.


Jared, though...


Well, it will take some planning, but he's clearly half-asleep and distracted after the emotional roller coaster that girls had taken them on. Yes, after all of those tears and the yelling, killing them will be way too fun. But he can wait. First, he has to plan... and he has all night for that to happen.
 
Jared's fingers close around the bat that Ilya has handed him, and he yawns, stifling it behind his hand as he tries to sit up straighter. He widens his eyes, trying to keep them from watering or closing, and then begins to count slowly in his head in Spanish, trying to do so with an accent as well. Still, his eyelids keep drooping, and he continually rubs his hand over his face, trying to keep himself awake through frequent touch.


He pulls his legs up to his chest and props his chin on them, making himself turn his head to look side to side every once in a while. His sisters and Alina are asleep, Ilya close to it, and Peter too seems to be. Everything is okay.


It's so hard to stay awake.
 
He doesn't know how he manages it, but Peter actually finds a way to stay awake despite how incredibly bored he is. Of course, the knowledge that, at any second, Jared's going to fall asleep at the wheel is enough to keep him mostly awake. Peeking his eyes open, he glances over at the boy and sees that his defenses are almost completely down.


It's time.


Slowly, very careful not to make any noise, Peter climbs out from beneath his blanket and curls his hand around the rock he'd picked out earlier. It has a good weight to it, and while he might break a few fingers using it as an aid to his punch, it'll be worth it. At least, it will be once he's taken care of the entire camp. They're all so out of it anyway, he could probably take care of the situation before it wakes anyone up.


His heart rate climbs with excitement at the thought of finally being able to carry through with it. His mind is clear and it will be so easy. Peter tightens his grip around the rock as he walks around Jared, acting for a moment as though he's going off to take a leak and throws a punch hard into his temple. It's a good blow from the shoulder, with a good amount of weight behind it. He follows it up with his non-dominant hand, aiming it at his head still, but not caring as much where it goes.


So long as it takes him out of the picture, at least enough for him to take care of the rest of them, Peter doesn't much care.
 
When Peter stands, Jared blinks several more times, then tries to open his eyes wider, turning his head towards him slowly. He had thought the other boy was fast asleep; he certainly had seemed to be. He started to ask him what he was doing, but when Peter walked around him, it seemed to him he was just going to use the bathroom. Letting himself relax, he still kept his attention half focused on him, without speaking to indicate as such.


Jared saw the punch coming perhaps a second before it landed, giving him no time to fully escape its impact, but just barely enough time to jerk, away, lessening the severity of its blow. He threw himself sideways to the ground, Peter's punch glancing hard off the side of his head, his second blow catching him in the side. His elbow came down hard on one of Leigh's legs, and she woke up with a gasping scream, her hand automatically reaching out to hit Jared even as Jared, his head spinning, tried to scramble backwards, the hand on his bat jerking up and barely missing her instead of Peter.


"Get up, Leigh, run! Everyone, wake up!"
 
When Alina hears the screaming, at first, she thinks that it's just another nightmare, is briefly able to convince herself that the sounds of a struggle are nothing more than than the remnants of her dream, but then Jared is yelling for Leigh to run and her eyelids fly open. She struggles to sit up and sees Peter almost on top of Jared, the shape of his fist striking down at him while he's pinned between his sisters.


"Get off of him!" She yells in shock, starting to her feet. Ilya was awake now, and scrambling to his feet. Before Alina even knows entirely what's happening, he's gripping the back of Peter's shirt and throwing him off of Jared. She scrambles over to the melee and starts pulling Angie and Leigh up, shoving them away from the campsite. "Go!" Alina shouts, giving them a light but stern shove toward the river. "We'll come get you when it's safe, just GO!"


For having lived as long as she has, Ali has actually had to do very little fighting, but still, she grabs for some sort of weapon to take up. The handle of something is in her hand, but she's too frantic to bother noticing what it is, because right now, Ilya is losing. He's small, not necessarily short, but has a very slender body, one which looks puny in comparison to Peter's, who manages a clean hit to her brother's jaw with the rock in his hand.


Lifting her food, Alina aims a kick into his side and it makes its target easily. Peter grunts loudly, a wheezing sound not very different from the ones Ali makes when her breathing is bad whooshes out of her lungs and she aims another kick at him. It doesn't hit his side, but instead is caught between Peter's hands and he yanks hard, knocking her clean off of her feet. When she hits the ground, he is on top of her and the side of her face explodes with pain, whipping to the side. She cries out, stars bursting into her vision and then -


Something warm is on her hand and when Alina turns her head to look up at Peter, wondering why he isn't still hitting her, his eyes are wide, staring down at her as though she's just kicked his puppy or something. The warmth that was on her hand is spreading down her arm, but she can't look, not at the angle that she's at, not with his fingers having reached up to dig into her face weakly before he is pulled off of her and simply falls onto the ground.


It's then that she's able to look down at the folding knife that had been in her hand, that must have been left open before because she has no memory of opening it. The warmth had been blood, which shone black in the moonlight, but had also dropped heavily only her shirt. She stares at him, wide eyed and uses her feet to propel her away from him without leaving the ground, the knife still clenched tightly in her hand.


Ilya just stares at Alina. Peter's cursing as he gradually bleeds out on the ground is merely background noise. He watches as she flings the knife aside and tries frantically to clean the blood off of her hand on the grass, her throat working desperately as though she's trying not to throw up.


"Ali," He says softly, and reaches out to her to do... something. He doesn't even know, really, just comfort her, but she is too busy trying to wipe the blood off of her hand, too busy fussing with her shirt, suddenly gripped with a need for cleanliness that he's never seen in her before. It doesn't last more than 45 seconds before she's able to get a grip on herself and stands, turning her back to Ilya and Jared. She grabs a shirt from one of the bags and, with little modesty - which would have appalled Ilya under any other circumstances -, strips her shirt off and pulls on the clean one before tossing it onto the fire pit, jaw set tightly.


Wide-eyed, Ilya glances over at Jared. He wants to ask if he's okay, if he's hurt too badly, to ask him what to do about Alina, but his voice is completely lost.


It's Ali who speaks up, her voice only slightly betraying the stubborn set of her face. "We need to get rid of him. Before we bring the girls back."
 
It is generally Angelina's nature, in the midst of danger, to freeze and withdraw in hopes of being passed over rather than to kick herself into an active gear. This is what she starts to do when she is awakened by everyone's cries, not even lifting her head from her pillow or opening her eyes. If she ignores it all, maybe it will just be a dream, maybe it will go away. Her voice has become a dry husk in her throat, and she could not scream if she wanted to.


But hands are grabbing at her, pulling her up, and then someone is yanking her along by the arm, so hard that Angelina's arm would have been yanked out of its socket if she didn't finally experience feeling returning to her feet, her legs beginning to move instinctively as someone continued to pull her, screaming and sobbing all the way. It wasn't until that same person had stopped running and pulled her to a stop too, then wrapped their arms around her, her breath fast and teary against her ear, and she could feel their heartbeat against her spine, feel her tears dripping into her hair, that Angelina realized that it was Leigh who was pushing her along, Leigh holding her now, whimpering softly and gasping for breath, her lips pressed against the crown of Angelina's hair as if trying to stifle words from emerging. Slowly Angelina touched her sister's arms, her eyes open in the darkness, and listened to the sounds of screams and scuffling still going on in the distance.


The fight is over before Jared can hardly follow how it had begun. One minute he is trying to fight back against Peter, his temple seeping blood from a cut that he can barely feel, his ribs catching with each breath, his head spinning as bile rises in his throat. Then his sisters are screaming, or at least someone is, running, are they being chased? Is Peter after them? Does Peter have them?


He feels on the verge of losing consciousness, though he doesn't realize that this is what the faintness in his head, the nausea he is experiencing, is indicating. He struggles past this, his hand closing progressively tighter around the baseball bat in his hand, and then swings out with it, hearing it connect with something, a body, and only hoping that it is Peter's and not someone else's. It could be his own, for all he knows right now. When his vision clears a little and he looks up again, he cannot estimate how much time has passed, nor what has happened. He can see that Peter has been stabbed, though he has no idea how or by whom; he can see that Alina is in the process, it appears, of changing shirts, though this too hardly earns more than a fast blink from him. There is a knife in Alina's hand, and this is when he pieces it together.


Alina must have killed him. Somehow, Alina had killed him.


"Ali," he whispers, his voice a hoarse croak, and he clears his throat, trying to push himself to his feet and feeling the world tremble before his vision before he manages. "Ali..."


There seems few words that will cover what has happened, what he feels or what she must feel, and so he settles for reaching out for her, to take hold of any part of her that happens to be close.
 
Alina almost flinches at the touch of Jared's hand on her arm, but she is trying hard to be brave, to assure herself that she's done the right thing - the safe thing. But still-


Don't think about it. She tells herself harshly, and just lets herself turn into Jared, her face pressing into his chest, arms locking themselves around him as they both struggle to keep the other standing. There are no tears, she's too busy trying to numb herself for any real emotion to force its way through, but physically...


God, her head hurts. She can't even imagine how Jared and Ilya must be feeling... they both seemed to have taken much harder beatings than she did. Her hands rub his back slowly before she forces herself from the warmth of his grip and looks up at him, "Are you okay? You... your head, I mean?"


From the corner of her eye, she sees Ilya dragging Peter's body off and her heart breaks. How often is he going to have to clean up her messes? "Come on. Let's clean up your head, okay? Just... don't pass out on me."
 
Automatically Jared locks his arms around Alina, at first in reaction to her hug, leaning into her for support almost as much as she is leaning into him. His arms are loose at first, but gradually they tighten until he is almost clutching her to him, his heart beating a rapid staccato against hers. She is warm and real, a solid presence to ground him, and he wants and needs to touch her then above all others, in a manner of intensity he had never quite felt towards another person that he could recall before.


Her hand is moving over his back, and his comes up to cup the back of her head, shaking fingers twining with her hair as his breathing staggers, then gradually begins to resume a slightly more normal rate. When she pulls back from him, he examines her face with some anxiety, one finger tracing the curve of her jaw. It takes him a moment to understand her question.


"I...I think I'm fine...."


He is pretty sure he's not concussed. It is shock more than anything that is delaying his thoughts and reactions, leaving him hardly able to react at all. When he finally tears his eyes away from Alina's face, seeing Ilya dragging Peter's body, a sudden burst of panic stabs his heart, and he gasps, eyes darting as he searches for his sisters.


"Leigh, Angie, where are they?!"
 
Jared's finger feels soft against her jaw, and, were this under any other circumstances, Alina might even find it romantic and cute instead of the two of them just trying to find some sort of comfort with each other. Her eyes follow the small trickle of blood moving down his face from his temple and, one hand still gripping at his shirt, desperate for at least some level of closeness, uses her leg to help pull her sleeve over her other hand. She lifts it and dabs at it as gently as she can, not necessarily in an attempt to stop the bleeding, but to see the extent of the damage that's been done beneath the blood. Thankfully, the cut isn't deep, but she would feel better if it had some sort of bandage on it.


She's just about to say so when Jared gasps, panic flooding his features. It's so sudden that she flinches and immediately looks around to ensure that all of their screaming hasn't drawn more adults, suddenly terrified that an entire mob of them must be descending upon them. When he expresses his concern for the girls, she nearly cries with the relief of that being it.


"They ran," Alina tells him quietly, her voice surprisingly strong for someone who has just committed their first murder, and points in the direction she vaguely remembers the girls taking off in. "I told them we'd come for them when it was safe."


It occurs to her then that she'd had no intention of letting Peter live through the altercation. While she may not have been thinking that way exactly when she shoved the girls away from the puppy pile they'd formed with their brother, she had been preparing herself for his death from the moment he'd stepped onto the camp. The fact that he'd landed on her knife, whether by accident or from Alina thrusting it into his chest - she still wasn't clear on which had happened - had seemed to her like a sort of self fulfilling prophecy.


She won't say this out loud though, afraid that it would scare Jared, that it would make him think she was some kind of sleeper that would lose it and start killing everyone now that she has a taste for it. It isn't the case. Alina knows that, but still, her gut twists painfully and she sucks in a breath, hating how it quivers.


"You should go to them. I'll help Ilya... maybe take a few minutes so we can get the -" She stops herself from saying the word 'blood', still watching his features carefully. "So we can clean up... maybe get a fire going."


Somehow, she didn't see anyone getting much sleep tonight. Reaching forward, she takes Jared's hand and gives it a tight squeeze, unsure who she's trying to comfort more - him or herself, and tries to smile a little but fails miserably. Alina steps back and bows her head to go after Ilya, who hasn't gotten very far. Wordlessly, she stoops to grab his legs, surprised at how not disgusted she is by this and sucks in a breath, heaving Peter's bottom half into the air so that they are carrying him, and making decent pace of it despite his weight.


"Do- do you think... think the animals will get... get him?" Ali asks, struggling to alternate her breath and her steps.


Ilya doesn't seem to be faring much better, "I really..." he pauses to grunt, nearly tripping over a root, "really hope so." When they're far enough from the camp, Ilya gives her a small nod and she drops his legs unceremoniously, fighting the urge to hawk up a loogie onto his corpse too. Ilya rubs his hands on his pant legs, looking anywhere but the body, "I'll check back tomorrow night... to see if he's gone." He clears his throat, "Should we bury him?"


Alina shakes her head, meeting her brother's eyes for the first time since before they'd gone to bed. "He doesn't deserve a burial."


Ilya seems shocked at her response, but says nothing about it. He simply nods and starts back to the camp.
 
Alina's fingers against him are gentle, so much so that Jared barely feels pain as she examines him. It is almost soothing enough for him to close his eyes and just let himself focus on her touch, on her body near his, to wrap her close to him and try to forget all else and exist in the moment with her.


But he cannot. His sisters are missing, his sisters are alone and frightened and maybe hurt too, and he has to go to them, they have to be found and dealt with immediately.


Alina is telling him that they ran, and if they ran, they have to be okay, physically, anyway, right? They'll be okay. They aren't hurt, they'll be okay...


Jared repeats this like a mantra in his head as he asks her hoarsely which way they went, then started off in that directly, softly calling their names. Running blind in the darkness, they could have gone anywhere, could have even got separated. What if they had lost each other and Angelina now lay alone, silent and shaking in the darkness? What if she had gotten disoriented enough to run into the river? What if-


Jared couldn't let this thought go on. He picked up the pace, widening his eyes in effort to see better in the darkness, as he raised his voice. "Leigh? Angie? It's Jared, it's...it's okay. Hey..."


It was a few minutes before he found them; though they had heard his voice, they had not called back to him. He would reason to himself later that Leigh must have thought it possible that he were Peter, trying to trap them, or perhaps she was still too frightened to be able to find her voice. Whatever the case, when he came upon them they were crouched to the ground at the foot of the river, Leigh's arms and most of her body entirely wrapped around Angelina, and both shook so badly he thought at first that they must have been in the river, that they were shivering from cold.


When he dropped down in front of them, wrapping his arms around them both at once, neither reacted at first. He could hear someone's teeth chattering, and they were both riddled with goosebumps up their arms, though the night was reasonably warm. He held them, whispering their names and telling them that they were okay, that everyone was okay, and it wasn't until Leigh started to cry, saying only his name, Ilya's, and Alina's over and over, that he became more sure that they were at least unhurt.


Jared took Angelina up on his hip, her arm coming to wrap around his neck so tightly it almost choked him, and Leigh clung to him around his waist like a much younger child, burying her face in his side as though she wanted him to pick her up too. He couldn't do this, at least not while holding Angie, but he rubbed her back until she loosened her hold on him, then, with Leigh still grasping him, his arm around her, began to make his way back. It wasn't until he could see Ilya and Alina, blurred, in the distance, that he realized he was crying too.
 
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