The Person Above Rolled a 1

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

You sink, and I’m pretty sure water puts out fire.

(MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-)

You forget what your favorite song even was.

I attempt to scale a wall, but I roll a one.

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

You fall all the way down. Unfortunately fire doesn’t equate to a cushioned fall.

I try to continue writing my fanfic but I took a 1.

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

*Fall Damage Immunity* (PLATFORMING!)
Your computer blue-screens from the awful work you make. That's all gone now.

I try to climb a rock wall. I'm immune to fall damage, so...

 

[Venchi1986]

The entire rock wall collapses the second you touch it and you get caught underneath the rubble.

I try to not swallow my gum but I roll an one.

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

(AAAAAAAA ROCKS-)
You choke on your gum instead.

I try to do parkour but roll a Nat 1.

 

[countstellations]

you try to do parkour but you jump directly into a manhole. hardcore!
I try to eat soup but roll a 1.

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

You instead choke on the soup... somehow???

I try to file my taxes but I roll a Nat 1.

 

[Sir Fungus]

You accidentally knock your cup of coffee all over your lamp, thus starting a fire, you were able to quickly put it out, but now your taxes are burned to a crisp.

I try to run up to Gwyn, lord of cinder at level 1 but ROLL a nat 1

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

You get stepped on by a giant creature. How did that even get there...

I try to make a joke concerning Dave the Frog but I roll a 1.

 

[Sir Fungus]

Nobody understood the reference, you are left alone looking like an idiot.

I try to catch Cerberus but roll a 1

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

Instead Cerberus catches you.

I try to hug a wolf but roll a Nat 1.

 

[Venchi1986]

You get bitten by the rabid wolf.

I try to sit down but I roll an one.

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

You break whatever you're sitting on and are forced to stand.

I attempt to stand. I roll a Nat 1.

 

[Skitts]

I attempt to stand. I roll a Nat 1.

Standing? Standing is easy. You try to get up from your chair and lose balance the moment you start to lift yourself. The leg you put your weight on slips from under you and under the chair, kicking a chair leg in the process and knocking it over while meeting the hard floor headfirst since your arms slip and don't take the impact instead. The chair lands on your back, knocking your breath out and the back of the chair lands an extra hit on your head and remains there as if you're still sitting in it, sort of. One of your shoulders is wrenched, and the ankle that slipped got twisted.

-----------------

I attempt to write down a note with a technical pencil. The die rolls far, then stops proudly on a Natural 1.

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

The lead snaps, and when you try to extend it, the pencil jams... somehow.

I try to use Pinterest but I roll a 1.

 

[Betsumei No Ishi]

You end up at deviantart.

I try to watch hentai but roll a 1

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

(Luckily, I have immunity to fall damage, and I have no arms! But my ankle hurts...)

Your laptop is blacklisted.

I try to bounce on a trampoline but roll a one.

 

[Betsumei No Ishi]

Congratulations! You managed to break a hole in it!

I try to stalk someone but roll a 1

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

(AAAA-)

The person your stalking calls the cops, and the cops find you wherever you are.

I try to grab an apple and roll a Nat 1. The fruit is from a bowl.

 

[Betsumei No Ishi]

The bowl shatters alongside the apple.

I try to play the guitar

 

[Venchi1986]

Every single guitar string breaks.

I try to buy a bar of chocolate but I rolled an one.

 

[Betsumei No Ishi]

She gave you a hard, hard brick. What a scam!

I try to hire a hitman but roll a 1

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

Due to your charismatic skills, you've pissed off the hitmen. RUN.

I try to eat an apple, but I roll a 1.

 

[Betsumei No Ishi]

You've eaten G L A S S by mistake!

I try to fall asleep but roll a 1

 

[Ilikepie]

You become end up watching videos on youtube instead

I try to tame a baby dragon but roll a 1