The Person Above Rolled a 1

[.Arteries.]

You only perform one jump, then implode.

I try and buy some plums, but roll a 1.

 

[Superfly47]

You go to the grocery store, but Pikachu ate all the plums.

I try to swim, but roll a one.

 

[.Arteries.]

(NOOOOOOOO!)
You get blown up by the government because you were mistaken for a mutated rat.

I try and shove someone away but wow no way I rolled a 1.

 

[SnaccSabbath]

(NOOOOOOOO!)
You get blown up by the government because you were mistaken for a mutated rat.

I try and shove someone away but wow no way I rolled a 1.

You manage to push yourself away and float away free of gravity.

I try to respond to work emails and rolled a 1.

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

What is this madness? You thought it was your computer but looks like Ant-Man played a trick on you... with his fire ant friends.

I try to buy Bucky plums but I roll a 1.

 

[.Arteries.]

You try and buy me some plums but the plums are disguised bombs. Your house explodes when you get home.

I try and hug Swift, but roll a 1.

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

You trip over a rock, bowling us both into a lake. Just then, Vulture drops Spider-Man into the same lake, right on top of us.

I try to get a Stark internship but I roll a 1.

 

[Leon The Needled Riolu]

I try to perform a double jump, but I roll a 1.

(I did that one before-)

Stark simply doesn't give you the internship.

I try to use fishing rod correctly despite my major fear and weakness to water, and I roll a 1.

 

[Redfork2000]

A fish bites, but it's so large that it pulls you into the water. Sleeping with the fishes has a whole new meaning now.

I try to buy a new car, but I roll a 1.

 

[weldherwings]

it smells like rotting fish inside.
like
horrible
horrible
rotting fish
on a summers day.

i finally meet my favourite celebrity, but i roll a 1

 

[Redfork2000]

You accidentally trip while you walk, and fall right over your favorite celebrity, knocking them over too. The security guards then consider you a threat, and toss you away. Other fans that were there when it happened took photos and recorded the whole thing.

I try to cook fried chicken, but I roll a 1.

 

[Superfly47]

Instead the chicken fried you.

I try to jump, but roll a one.

 

[Sir Fungus]

You jump, but on your way down, you land face first and end up with a broken nose.

I Try to be friendly to a succubus, but rolled a one.

 

[Superfly47]

The succubus sucks you dry.

You try to dance, but roll a one.

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

Apparently you meet someone whose actual name is You and they dance a lot better than you do.

I try to go back in time and save Iron Man from Endgame but I roll a 1.

 

[Meredith]

What you think is a time machine is just an antique sports car, and you are arrested for stealing it.

I try to make tea and biscuits but roll a one.

 

[Sir Fungus]

The biscuits come out great, but instead of tea leaves, you accidentally used poison ivy.

I try to lull Cthulhu back to slumber but roll a 1

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

Unfortunately the dice does not know what that is so it does not roll at all.
You’ll never get a one... or any other number.

I try to read without getting distracted by Discord or RpN but I roll a 1.

 

[.Arteries.]

You end up looking at the book, only for it to turn into a computer, with you logged on to RpN. If you pick up another book, it turns into a computer logged into your Discord. The cycle repeats anytime you pick up a book.

I try and shake someone's hand, but roll a 1.

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

Tony Stark’s Law Abiding Gang bursts in and arrests you before you can.

I try to write my character into Homecoming but I roll a 1.

 

[5cookie]

(I have no idea what that is but i'll try the best I can)
The words you write about your character vanish in thin air as you wirte them, thefore not allowing you to put your character into Homecoming.

I try to make popsicles out of soda (Preferrably Sierra Mist), but I roll a 1.

 

[Redfork2000]

The freezer stops working before the popsicles are even close to being solid.

I try to open a bag of potato chips, but I roll a 1.

 

[Swift_Phoenix]

The bag explodes all over the place, and you never get a single chip. ):

I try to make friends with Spider-Man, but I roll a 1.

 

[Redfork2000]

You mistook a fan that was cosplaying as him to be the real Spider-Man, and ended up making friends with that fan instead.

I try to dig up a treasure chest, but I roll a 1.

 

[.Arteries.]

You dig up a coffin, not a chest.

I try and ride SCP 682, but roll a 1.

(682 is best lizard boi.)