If you were a Deathlord

Oh, I'm a teddy bear when you get to know me.


A genetically engineered mass-murdering teddy bear that shoots bees from my eyes, but nonetheless...
 
I would put then in a pocket in Elsewhere only accessible through a specific ritual (that I created and taught to no one) requiring an Artifact of my own design and the sacrifice of 1000 living souls for every Monstrance that I needed access to.


Trust absolutely no one and who cares about 1000 living souls if you're a Deathlord.


Though, acoording to cannon, all of the Monstrances are supposed to be sitting next to the well to the Void in each Deathlord's personal Manse.  And you can supposedly take your own Monstrance as a level 4 Artifact at the beginning of game.


But, if I had my way, that's what I would do.
 
Though' date=' acoording to cannon, all of the Monstrances are supposed to be sitting next to the well to the Void in each Deathlord's personal Manse. [/quote']
Can you give a page ref?
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That can't be true. Not only have I never read such a thing, Cold House, Eye and Seven Despair's citadel, has separate floors for Eye's personal chamber and the monstrances and for the chamber which hosts a Mouth of Oblivion.
 
I would put then in a pocket in Elsewhere only accessible through a specific ritual (that I created and taught to no one) requiring an Artifact of my own design and the sacrifice of 1000 living souls for every Monstrance that I needed access to.
Trust absolutely no one and who cares about 1000 living souls if you're a Deathlord.
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You'd be a boring deathlord. No player character could ever steal them, therefore you have written yourself out of the campaign in terms of monstrances, which means you fail.


If I was a deathlord I would steal from indiana jones. All my monstrances would be on display, together with a couple of hundred copies that do nothing but kill anyone who touches them by aging him a couple of thousand years in mere seconds.


Only one of my slaves knows where the real ones stand. I keep him loyal by abducting his family to which I have fed a longlasting poison (highly exotic only few people know which one it is). They have to get daily rations of antidose to stay alive.
 
I'd just chuck them in the back of a broom closet in the servant's wing and throw a sheet over them.


And then set up all the fancy obvious death traps of the type Safim described so well, the only difference being they're all fakes.
 
I'd use magic to turn it into a person, implant memories saying I killed their family etc, send them off to be fostered in some random village somewhere where they will grow up harbouring thoughts of revenge for me.


then when they grow up big and strong and come to try to kill me with their goofy sidekick I'd activate the brainwashing spell and turn him into one of my servants, give him huuge power etc, maybe make him look like a deathknight.


Then implant mooore memories so he'll run to the pc's (read as biggest current threat to me) and think he's beatraying me... right up until they storm my fortress then he'll betray THEM etc etc repeat ad infinitum


then set up about a hundred copies of some shiny bauble that are all deathtraps yadayada
 
Slightly on topic, recently I've created a Deathlord that's all about birds, I can't recall her title, but she's basically a bat-sh*t crazy bird lady. She keeps all her cages suspended from the ceiling and talks to them like they are precious birds. The cages are however suspended over her personal hole into the abyss, I am hoping that would not encourage theft.
 
Hmmm...I'd probably stash mine in a fortress located outside time, returning only under certain conditions, or when a specific ritual will open that dimension. Of course being a mad villain I am, my favored ghostly concubine accompanies me on my occasional trips there, and has learned the ritual...and many of my minions, and certainly the rest of my harem are aware she has accompanied me. Once you manage to get there, a quest in itself, first requiring one manage to learn the ritual, you will find that the fortress is heavily guarded by various undead and automata forces, created specifically for that purpose, and the monstrance location is heavily trapped. However, the majority of the fortress is only guarded and not trapped, with my secret laboratories for crafting and experimenting inside, as well as some quite opulent quarters for my own use, and a small horde of automata servants, concubines and what have you.
 
I'd find the nearest portal to Yushan, dig up a section of earth just in proximity enough to be considered "under" the portal and store it there - just cause I like the irony.


Otherwise, I'd build a fortress of ultimate doom just outside a major city.  I'd deck the fortress out with horrible creations of doom and destruction and gloat about how I finally built something so impregnable that I can safely store all my most precious treasures.  Then I'll casually stroll into the city and take out a bank deposit box at a reputable banking institution and stash it there.


Otherwise, I'd pack it in a crate, label the crate "Immaculate Texts" and ship it back to myself via the Guild on the longest route I can find.
 
Anyone got an answer that's both serious and interesting?
 
I would consider nearly all of the aforementioned ideas as viable for a story.


You just don't like us anymore. :cry:
 
Safim said:
You'd be a boring deathlord. No player character could ever steal them, therefore you have written yourself out of the campaign in terms of monstrances, which means you fail.
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Therein lies the conundrum.  The "interesting" choices are always the ones that involve the good guys figuring them out in the long run, which inevitably leaves your audience questioning the intellect and/or the sanity of the main villain.  With the stakes being what they are who would EVER choose "interesting" over "functional"?


The discussion is ambiguous and without "right" or "wrong" answers - the original question didn't demand "interesting" (or "serious" for that matter), as it lacks any context.  Who's to say being boring is bad - if we're talking about what we as individuals would do, boring IS the right answer.  If you're asking for something to present to a group of players as an obstacle, then that's another matter.


Another problem is that the resources at the disposal of the deathlord are totally arbitrary - meaning any limitation on their defenses are arbitrary as well.  We lack a set  of universal definitions of what a deathlord can and cannot do to protect a monstrance, so thus no defense will ever be interesting because it will be either arbitrarily powerful or arbitrarily weak.  Without a complex system to build within, we're just making crap up - the only "interesting" defenses will be built within a world that's either too complex to convey here or too idiosyncratic to seem interesting to anyone except for the participants in the story.
 
*bows*


You have become very wise, grasshopper.

Flagg said:
You just don't like us <strike>anymore</strike>. :cry:
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Fixed.
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frogs-laughing.gif
 
Sato said:
Safim said:
You'd be a boring deathlord. No player character could ever steal them, therefore you have written yourself out of the campaign in terms of monstrances, which means you fail.
Click to expand...
Therein lies the conundrum.  The "interesting" choices are always the ones that involve the good guys figuring them out in the long run, which inevitably leaves your audience questioning the intellect and/or the sanity of the main villain.  With the stakes being what they are who would EVER choose "interesting" over "functional"?


The discussion is ambiguous and without "right" or "wrong" answers - the original question didn't demand "interesting" (or "serious" for that matter), as it lacks any context.  Who's to say being boring is bad - if we're talking about what we as individuals would do, boring IS the right answer.  If you're asking for something to present to a group of players as an obstacle, then that's another matter.


Another problem is that the resources at the disposal of the deathlord are totally arbitrary - meaning any limitation on their defenses are arbitrary as well.  We lack a set  of universal definitions of what a deathlord can and cannot do to protect a monstrance, so thus no defense will ever be interesting because it will be either arbitrarily powerful or arbitrarily weak.  Without a complex system to build within, we're just making crap up - the only "interesting" defenses will be built within a world that's either too complex to convey here or too idiosyncratic to seem interesting to anyone except for the participants in the story.
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I can of course only speak for me, but when it comes to my favourite past-time then interesting beats boring. Always.
 
I'm with Saphim on this one.


Deathlord shall be bored to death, and the only pleasure they would take from their after lives is to find expressions for their superiority and skills and find original ways to make even their deathknights they don't stand a chance should they try to go renegade.
 
Mine would be in a room that sits in almost the lowest part possible of my home. The path there would be covered by Sorcery, but only half way there is the path still safe to traverse, as after that point the path would be part of the Labyrinth, technically still beneath my abode, but not traversable by most. I would have created a couple of minor Artifacts that act as speakers of sort allowing those traversing the paths to hear the whisper of my Neverborn Master/Mistress. I would crate the room as also a Temple where I might commune with my Master. And an effect that would trap those that trespass into the room, ghost or living, and siphon their life, their Willpower, and their Essence to my Neverborn Master in tribute. The husks would then be deposited into Void thereafter, if any are left.
 
You might try some kind of anti-Exalted deathtrap where the only way to survive is to climb into the Monstrances.
 
can I just ask, what is a Monstrance?


I figger it's a source of power or soul or something, I never read either of the abyssal books (despite owning the first ed one).
 
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