Fandom Forbidden and Scarred Love { The Last of Us 1x1 with icedthemoon }

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

The walk to their room was quiet, he could sense the turmoil inside his husband. Jacob, in helping Hayden, read a lot of books on the mind. Any book he could find on mental processing and how the brain could get stuck, could blend the past, the present and everything bad that happened in between. He noticed as they walked, that Soren was moving almost mechanically. It was so unlike his husband that it was terrifying too. Up stairs, down the hall and into the room. He led them into the room, shutting and locking the door behind them. Then he wrapped his arms around Soren and looked at him. "Alright. Now, do I have to guess what's going on or are you going to talk to me now that we're alone?"

Josh, having watched Soren leave like that, bit his lip at the squeeze to his leg. He was still getting flashes of the past, flashes of the present. All merged together. The falling over the body, the fear that he wasn't going to make it back settled in his mind like a brick once more. While the atmosphere was bright with Luke's excited demeanor, he was still having problems discerning the two. "Of course love. I'll speak to the group when we finish here." Josh said as he looked at Hayden. Kai finished his meal as he looked over at his fathers. Today had been terrifying to him, but he didn't have the clash of the past and present. Meanwhile Luke was happy to hear that before he turned to Ravi. "You know what that means right? We can take that walk tomorrow after we check on the gun. If.. you still wanted to go on a walk with me tomorrow."​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

Soren all but fell into Jacob’s arms as soon as they were there to hold him up. He let out a breath so deep he might have been holding it that whole walk. He buried any and every part of him that he could while standing. He focused his breathing through his mouth. In and out. In and out. He told the rest of it no. This did not get to rule him. He could feel the heat of oncoming tears, and he knew that if he started now, he would take too long to finish to explain anything. So they had to wait. “We should have checked.” It was low and muffled from where he hid against him. “We should have checked that door years ago, but we were afraid. We were too afraid to make sure that this place was safe, and we endangered so many people for so many years.” How long had it been open? What happened between then and now? Who died because of their negligence? That was on Soren. He was the veteran in this business. He knew what it was like to deal with disaster. This was a disaster like them all, and he didn’t follow the procedures. None of FEDRA did, but they weren’t the ones who went down there. That was him.

Hayden narrowed his eyes a little. Curious. He did not have the same awareness of his husband as Jacob and Soren, but he was aware enough. The last month was a testament to the stubbornness and tenacity of them both in learning how to truly be a pair again. He placed a gently hand on Josh’s cheek and coaxed him into looking at him. “Unless you want to go together. We can do them both.” Ravi, who had not be looking up, was at first unaware that the words were directed towards him. After a too long moment of silence, he realized that talking about checking on a gun and going for a walk was definitely something that had to do with him. His beet red cheeks filled with air as he stared wide eyed at Luke. “Uh, um…” It wasn’t that he didn’t want to. It was that he suddenly felt very much in the spotlight, and that was too new for him. “Yeah, I… I still want to.” He tried out a smile, and it ended up looking goofy across his face. Theo kept the rest of the talking go. “Sweet, man, it’s gonna be awesome to have all of us. I swear I’m sleeping in until the sun dies. I am pooped.”​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Jacob felt Soren fall into his arms, and he held him close, felt him bury himself against him. He knew his husband was affected, and he held him close. Held him up. He could hear him breathing, good. That was good. He heard the low muffled words from Soren, where his face was hid against him. He listened completely, let Soren talk. Once he was done, he gently guided Soren's head from where it was buried. "Look at me. You did everything you could to keep us safe. You were one man in a huge army protecting all of us from infected. FEDRA did a lot of things wrong. And a lot of their choices stemmed from fear. Yes, that seal should've been checked way before now. But, this does not fall on you and you alone. It falls upon those that made decisions." He said, although, it sounded like he was blaming his brother. Josh had gotten to General, he made decisions. "My love, my heart. You did the best you could with what you had." Jacob added, his eyes looking at Soren with love.

Josh felt the hand on his cheek and he sighed softly, looking at his husband. His blue eyes were a little dull as he sat there. "I would like that. A lot." Josh replied, his eyes brightening just a little bit. Luke looked at Ravi, seeing those beet red cheeks and wide eyes. He saw that bit of a smile, and Luke couldn't help but find it adorable. "Oh good. I can't wait. I can come by your room after breakfast or.. we could meet here for breakfast?" Luke asked, watching him. Kai looked at Theo and nodded, a yawn slipping out. "I agree. I think I'm ready to hit the hay." Kai said as he stood up, stretching before he started to clean up the trash and trays of those that were finished.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

No. Jacob could tell him that he did everything, but this was proof that he didn’t. This was not the first time that he and Josh thought about what they left behind. There were so many days when he remembered that basement and those lower levels, and he knew he needed to check. He kept telling himself that they closed it off. Infected weren’t too great at opening doors. It was a temporary solution that they made up in the moment. A temporary solution he never fixed. They never fixed. And who made that temporary solution? Josh. Not Soren. He was thankful to Josh more than ever that day, and he did not resent him or anything for that. It did however again prove how little he did to fix this problem. His eyes still fell as Jacob brought his head up. He could not look at the person he loved the most while he admitted what he did. “It’s not the best.” He knew the best. He and Josh could do the best all day long. Not with this. “Today, we finally couldn’t ignore it anymore. Twenty years later, we finally checked, and it wasn’t just open. They were out. We are lucky they hadn’t made it farther. And Josh-“ He sucked in a deep breath as he saw him fall. Watched him lay there instead of running to his aid, because Soren got stuck. “He almost-“ If Kai had not been there, he could have lost Josh. “I couldn’t save him, Jacob. Not because he was too far away. Not because it was impossible. I just couldn’t.”

Hayden rubbed his thumb across Josh’s cheek. “Okay. Then we do it all together. No splitting up this time.” He kissed his cheek and turned back to his food that he probably should finish eating now that everyone was talking about heading out and being on their way. He glanced at Kai. “Have a good night, sweet boy. And Kaiden.” He caught his eye as he was cleaning up the table. “Today was hard. Whatever you need, we are here for you.” Theo popped up too to help Kai clean up. Ravi was trying to process the possibility of meeting after breakfast when the new possibility was again being here for breakfast. He hesitated, eyes darting from one person at the table to the next. “You… want me to… to eat breakfast here?” Theo moved by and clapped a hand on his back. “‘Course! Any new friend of Luke’s is a new friend of ours too. Welcome to the clan.” He chuckled and moved away to put up everyone’s trays to include Ravi’s who decided that he was done eating. Ravi blinked. After feeling so outside the entire meal, he was shocked that they would want him to come back. “Are you sure?”​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Jacob heard his words, heard that they couldn't ignore it anymore. He also noticed that Soren did not look at him when he guided his head up. "You're right. It should've been checked sooner than that. Sooner than twenty years down the road." He said softly, looking at him. "And that door was open, they were out. So like the protectors you are, you sealed it again." Jacob said quietly before he heard that deep breath, and then it all came out. They'd never checked the seal, the door was wide open and the infected got out, but that wasn't the only thing that had gotten to his husband. "What is really concerning you my love? The fact that the seal was never checked, almost losing Josh or having the boys with you too?" He needed to know what really got to him. There were so many things that it could be, and Jacob was, for the first time in his life with Soren, unsure exactly how to help him.

Josh felt the thumb rub across his cheek. "Sounds perfect to me." He said softly as he smiled at the kiss to his cheek. Kaiden came back from dropping off trays and heard his father. "Good night dad. Thank you. I love you both." He said, walking over and hugged Hayden from the back as his father was eating. Kai moved to look at Theo, waiting for his brother so they could head out. Luke looked at Ravi and before he could speak, Theo said something. Luke nodded, smiling big. "Yes. I am sure that I want you to eat breakfast here. Like Theo said, you're welcome here. And I'd really like you here."​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

When did he first freeze this time? Not twenty years ago. There was no remembering that anymore. But today. What happened today? It started before they went down there. When they kept looking at that door. Wondering if it was still blocked. They chose not to pull the boys in, because that was too much of a risk. Maybe they shouldn’t have a patrol group with only the family. And then the door was open. That was when everything stopped. The world stopped spinning when he realized that every nightmare he had was coming true. All of them. When Josh fell, that was another one. When Kai and Theo came, that was another one. He used to lay in bed trying to count how many people died twenty years ago, and he couldn’t because he wasn’t there for all of them. He still could not look at Jacob. “I…” He was holding a door closed. Running up the stairs. His heart was pounding so fast. “I…” He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know. What do you mean you don’t know? Josh’s voice rang through his whole mind like the toll of the dead. “I don’t know.” He closed his eyes and the first tears finally fell.

Hayden leaned into the hug with a satisfied hum. “I love you, little shark.” He worked on the last of his bites. Theo, having now said what he wished, hopped over to Kai and hooked his arm around his brother’s. “Alright, let’s go before I give new buddy a heart attack.” Ravi’s eyes darted from one to another as he tried his hardest to cope with this new world of information. Of want? So weird. No one ever asked him to join them like this. “Uh… okay?” Really like you here. What? This was so much to handle. “I guess I can meet you guys here tomorrow.” He let out a small laugh. “As long as you really mean that. I don’t actually mind if you think I’m intriguing.” He shrugged as he shrank a little in his seat. His facade of nonchalance was not working. ​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Jacob looked at Soren, watching him. He heard the start of words, then again, another start of words. Before he heard those three words. His heart broke in half, seeing the tears fall. His thumbs brushed at the streaks of tears falling from his eyes. He didn't know what was going on inside his husband's mind. But he was going to be there for him. Going to help him with this. "Okay." He whispered, kissing his forehead. "Okay." Kissed his cheeks, ignoring the tears. "I'm here." Kiss to his lips. "Let it all out. Don't hold it in." Jacob whispered, his forehead pressed against Soren's, thumbs brushing at the tears even if they kept coming. This. This was where he was needed. Not in some medical tent helping wounded men. Not in some cafeteria with the other members of their clan. Here. With his husband. Sharing his pain, helping him break and putting him back together again.

Kai smiled at that, as he turned and felt the arm hooked around his. He looked at Theo and nodded before waving to his parents and he led the way to the stairwell. Kai was ready to call it a day. Josh watched the two boys head out before looking at the last two. Luke smiled, hearing that and nodded. "Awesome! Hey, would you like company back to your room?" Luke asked curiously. He wouldn't be upset if not, he knew he could be a lot, especially to people he enjoyed spending time with. Josh looked over at Hayden. "Are you ready to go talk to them about moving Luke to my patrol and speak to the rest of the guys?"​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

Six. Six men died the last day. How many died before that? How many died when they went down the first time? He couldn’t remember anymore, and that was the problem. How could he not remember? Twenty years. Along the way, he rose in ranks- some, not all, he got married, he watched his nephew be born and grow up, he watched his family raise two kids that weren’t theirs but theirs anyway, he helped a rebellion, and he just about watched the very dramatic end of a relationship that e had been rooting for all those twenty years. He thought about the people who died all those years ago so many times, and now he couldn’t even remember how many there were. It started as silent tears, and it would continue that way other than his breaths. They were not loud, but they seemed to fill his ears. He kept his eyes closed as all of his grief leaked from them. “I am supposed to protect them.” His words came out in a haggard whisper. “Josh. The boys. Everyone in this city.” What they built from the ashes. “And I didn’t.”

Theo may have been the one with all of the energy, but it had been an extremely draining day. He was exhausted, and he did not think that even he would make it much longer. Between sneaking around to find notes, dealing with the basement, and then the big emotional hug that happened earlier, he could sleep forever. So when they made it up those stairs and down the hall, he was yawning so big that he was taking up the entire hall.

Ravi at first was a little terrified of this new proposition of more people being around for longer amounts of time. He hadn’t been alone all day, and though he would not consider himself a loner, he did consider himself an introvert as he was once told. He was trying to figure out a way to say no when it occurred to him that ‘company’ did not mean everyone. If Jacob, Soren, Kai, and Theo were already gone and Josh and Hayden were talking about going to do other things, that left only Luke as ‘company.’ His heart slowed. That was far less terrifying. He already knew that he kind of liked having Luke around. “Sure.” He too finally stood to leave. Hayden leaned his head on Josh’s shoulder, breathing him in for no reason than he wanted to. “I am. Are you ready, my love?” He sat up and reached for Josh’s hand. He would not be letting that go any time soon.​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Jacob had never seen the lower levels of the hospital. He’d seen the ER, he’d seen the people coming in. Bites, screams, the smell of blood and death clinging to them as they came in droves. He remembered sending them down to the surgery suites in the lower levels. And he remembered running out of that hospital, chased by his mother. Watched her get shot. But he never saw those levels himself. He knew what Soren told him. That people died and it was horrific down there. He heard those words, his head moving to look at Soren. He could hear the haggard whisper that he spoke with. “You cannot protect them by yourself. Shouldering that burden on your own will break you. It’s doing that now. Josh is your partner on patrol, your best friend. The boys were trained by you and him. There is a reason we set patrols up in groups of five to seven. Protection is shared. You shouldn’t have gone down there just the two of you. You should’ve brought the whole team.” Jacob didn’t hold back on his words. The rather frank honesty was needed here. “And you have protected us. You worked as a spy for us while in FEDRA. You helped build this place better when you came over. You are the strongest man I know. And I thank everything in the world that you’re mine. The desire and need to protect us, protect them is beautiful and wonderful, never let that go. But you are not alone either. Trust your men. Trust your brother. Trust your boys. And if you wish to break, trust me to help put you back together.”

Kaiden was stuck in his head as he walked with Theo up the stairs and down the hall. Images of Josh falling, of the infected running toward him flashed in his mind. And the image of seeing the two Seraphites came up occasionally too. It was exhausting, and he was ready for sleep. So he opened the door for them, locked it behind them and looked at Theo. “I’ll see you in the morning. I don’t think I can last much longer awake.” He admitted as he slid off his shoes and proceeded to flop down on his bed.

Luke smiled wide as he stood up, hearing that and nodded happily. He took care of the rest of the trash with a smile on his face. He looked over at Ravi and turned to head out with him. “Ready Sunshine?” He asked. Josh felt the head on his shoulder and smiled warmly. “I am ready dear.” Josh said softly as he took Hayden’s hand. He stood firm the table and helped his husband up before smiling over at the two boys. “See you later boys. And it was nice meeting you Ravi.” He said, as Luke smiled back at his uncle before he turned back to head out.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

That was enough. He needed Jacob to understand his faults and acknowledge what he did wrong. They should have taken the whole team, but the team was their boys. If they only had Kai, Theo, and Luke, then they were going to only ever have the boys with them. The next time they had to face something like the basement, may it never be like the basement, they were asking the boys to do that with them. But who else could they trust then the boys that they raised and trained? No one. “You’ve always put me back together,” he finally said. He may not break like Hayden or need care like Kai’s back. He did need Jacob every day. “Especially when I don’t know I need it.” He was probably pretty lucky to have his nurse be live-in. “The hospital was hard today.” It occurred to him now that Jacob didn’t have the full story of their patrol, and like he did he aimed to tell him everything now that he calmed more. Then, maybe, once Jacob knew it all, he could do with that what Jacob always did. He could help.

Theo waved as he crashed into his pillow face first. “See you later, bro,” came his muffled voice from afar. He did not even bother taking off his shoes. He wasn’t worried. In the night, he’d remedy that. Then he was gone. Dead to the world for a while.

Ravi still felt a little weird from dinner, and he wasn’t sure how breakfast was going to go with the group. Maybe it would be fine. Maybe it would be awkward. Maybe. He didn’t know how to know. What he did know was that there was Luke who was calling him Sunshine again and wanting to walk with him to his apartment on the lower level with all those other guys. “Ready, Rainbows.” He sidled up next to him and started their journey out of the cafeteria. As soon as they were out, he looked over his shoulder, let out a breath and a laugh, and said, “Okay, so that was a lot.”

Hayden got to his feet with Josh’s help, and then since he already had that hand, took advantage of the situation and pulled Josh in for a tight hug. He felt like his husband needed that today. He needed that too. He did not say anything, because none of his words could tell Josh how much he loved him and how glad he was that he was okay. Nothing could speak the truths of the horrors either of them saw. This hug could be a slight detour in their errands.​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Jacob looked at Soren, hearing his words and he smiled warmly. "That's my job. As your husband and your nurse. I see things even you don't see." He said softly, his eyes on his husband completely. "I'm sure it was hard. I didn't experience what you and Josh did, back then or today. So talk to me about it. Tell me what you saw, what you were feeling. I need all the pieces in order to put the puzzle that is my husband back together again." Jacob said softly, kissing Soren's forehead gently. He would be there to listen to him, to put him back together.

Luke chuckled as he watched Ravi sidle up next to him. He heard him and smiled as they headed out of the cafeteria. "I tried to tell you how they were." Luke said with a grin on his face as they walked through the hall back towards Ravi's apartment. "I um. I wanted to tell you that I had a great time today. And I was also wondering, how would you feel about going for a walk outside of the stadium fence?"

Josh stood there, and he smiled at the pull and tight hug from his husband. He wrapped his arms around Hayden and held onto him like the world would crumble and fall apart at his feet. His lifeline was holding onto him and he needed this. Josh tucked his head into Hayden's chest and let out a ragged breath. He stood like that for a few minutes, breathing slowly in and out. He felt the love in the hug, felt the feeling that it was trying to portray. He finally pulled his head up, kissing Hayden deeply before smiling as he pulled away. "Let's go get things done and we can head back to our room."​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

Soren looked at his husband, and he did not just see a man who married him. He saw some who genuinely was the best person in the whole of the world. Happenstance found him. Tragedy found him. Our of tragedy is always life. “I love you,” he breathed. This was not what he was supposed to be saying, though it was the most important thing. He needed Jacob to know that he appreciated everything. Finally, after letting out a significantly less ragged breath, he nodded. He could do this. “I hate going back there. The hospital only ever reminds of the days we lost so many people.” Soldiers. Friends. Parents. “We just got Kai back and Theo brought all of this new life and energy. I thought that this was going to be good then. This could be a new perspective on a bad situation.” He bit his lip. “But it hung over us. Both me and Josh. Like we could still hear all of it down there.” He sighed. He looked down. “You’re right. We should have called the team. Neither of us wanted to. We wanted it to be fine. We didn’t want to bring the boys down there.”

Ravi smiled, lifting his head up a little more than it had been in a while. He felt more relaxed without the swam of people. It was so easy around Luke. He seemed like a good friend to have. “You did, but I didn’t know that they would be so…” He was not sure how to describe them. “Lively?” It was close enough. His eyes wandered off down the hall as he thought about the conversations he witness, though it felt like overheard, and brought his attention back to Luke. “Out-outside?” That seemed a bit dangerous, right? He never went outside the stadium fence. “To… where?”

For a long time, Hayden was not good at showing his love. He knew this about himself. He frequently relived every harsh word and action that he did specifically towards Josh. He was so angry and bitter. Still, he found himself crawling back into that familiar, and he had to stop himself. He allowed Josh to stop him. He did not want to fight anymore. He did not want to let his own demons that he was too afraid to let go of be what got between them again. Josh was his forever, and he wanted to finally have that life that he dreamed about having so many years ago. He only smiled. Josh deserved every one that he could give. He squeezed his hand. “Right. Come on then. Times a wasting.” He chuckled and began to walk out of the cafeteria and into the halls.​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Jacob looked at him, hearing those breathed out words, and he smiled warmly. "I love you too." He whispered, before he listened. His heart hurt for his husband, hearing every thing about how the past and the present seemed to clash. He realized how hard it was to want to bring the boys down there, they'd just gotten them back to patrols and then to bring them where they lost so many people? "I'm sorry that you went through that again. I remember you talking about how hard it was the first time all those years ago that you went down there. And now you had to worry about the boys." Jacob said softly, kissing him gently. "There are things that should've been done better and things that we can't control. But given your fears of the past, I can understand why you didn't want to bring the boys down there. Now why don't we relax? Let's lay down and let me be your anchor again." Jacob said softly, gently pulling Soren to their bed.

Luke chuckled, hearing his words and smiled softly. "They are very lively." He agreed with a nod of his head. He heard Ravi's question and thought about the answer for a moment. "Well. I don't usually have a destination. But I was thinking about walking to the hotel and back? It's not super far but enough to spend some time together and it's safe." He said with a smile, looking at Ravi as they walked.

Josh smiled at the squeeze to his hand and looked at Hayden. He was so thankful that they were finally working to overcome their troubles and he felt like how they used to be before the world broke. He nodded and turned, heading out of the cafeteria and to speak to the others that controlled the patrol groups first. He walked at Hayden's pace as that smile never faded from his face.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

“If the boys are going to be our team, all of them, how am I supposed to protect them too if I can’t even protect Josh?” There it was. The question that was going to sit with him for the rest of the night. The rest of his life he wondered. How would he ever be able to live if anything happened to any of them? He could have done so much. Soren’s breath was still ragged as he followed Jacob to the bed. His anchor. His nurse. His husband. If anyone could put Soren back together, it was him, and it always had been since they met all those years ago. He sat on the edge of the bed.

Saying that Ravi was surprised by this suggestion would have been an understatement. Did people do this a lot? Go outside the stadium, outside the fence, and go for walks? How exactly was that safe? That did not at all seem safe. “Are you… are you sure that it’s okay? I’m just…” He stared out in front of them as they walked. He didn’t want to look at Luke and him see him being an absolute coward. “I’m just a mechanic. You’re the hero, remember?” Here he was thinking that the walk was going to be some like walk through the stadium or maybe even outside the stadium walls to feel the air and the wind. But to the hotel? Was that okay?

Hayden kept Josh close as they walked. It was for both of them. They needed that contact. They needed to be one. It had been far too long that they weren’t and a month was still not enough to catch up on years and years of doing this all wrong. They traveled out of the cafeteria and into the halls. As they walked, Hayden bowed his head to those they passed. He smiled. He greeted them. It was who he was when he was not so inwardly broken.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Jacob looked at Soren as he heard that question, even as he led him to their bed. He sat down on the edge of the bed beside him and took his hands, covering them in his own as he shifted to sit slightly sideways, one leg on the bed. "You can't protect everyone." The cold truth that Jacob needed to tell him. "And yet, you try so hard to. You need to trust your team to protect themselves, you and the others. If you had brought the two boys with you earlier, would that have changed anything? Maybe. If you hadn't brought them with you, anything could've happened. You put so much stress on yourself to be the protector for everyone, but that is not just your job. Josh, Kaiden, Theo, and now Luke. They are there to protect you and the others too. Trust your team. Trust your boys." Jacob said, squeezing the hands he held. "Now. Let's put that overthinking brain of yours to bed handsome." He said, kissing him deeply, a reminder that he would always be there for him. Jacob pulled on the hands he held in an attempt to guide Soren onto the bed.

Luke looked at Ravi and heard his words. "Sure. The scars don't come even remotely close to the stadium or the path to the hotel. And we keep it patrolled so there shouldn't be any infected either." HE said with a smile as they walked. "And, my mechanic, I'll protect you if I have to. I'll grab a gun so we have that protection." Luke added as he looked at him, and all too soon they were arriving at his door. "Well. I had a really great day, thank you." He said with a small smile.

Josh was more than happy to stay close to Hayden, he'd had enough being too far from him today. He wanted the contact, no he needed it. He walked with him down the hall and towards the patrol room where they had all the routes and teams written down. Inside was Jerry, the head patrolman. "Joshua, Hayden! So nice to see you two. What can I do for you?" Jerry asked, smiling at the two men. He was older, around Soren's age and had come over to the WLF from FEDRA too. He had graying hair and thick black glasses. Joshua had worked closely with Jerry back when they were both FEDRA.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

You can’t protect everyone. That was the truth. A serious, hard truth that was so hard to admit to himself. You can’t protect everyone. That was why they had teams, and who else could he trust but the men he raised and trained either the best partners in the world? His partner in patrols. His partner in life. These boys saved them. These boys proved themselves the most worthy of soldiers and heroes today, and it was only fair that Soren swallow that. He did. He wanted to. He couldn’t protect everyone, but together, they could protect more. He closed his eyes into the kiss, letting it bring him back to reality. He followed obediently to the bed. Sitting at first then laying down. Exhausted. He smiled. He pulled at Jacob to bring him close to him and wrap him in his arms. “Distract that overthinking brain of mine?” He bit his lower lip before just barely kissing Jacob’s lower lip.

My mechanic. Huh. Ravi blinked at the words, unsure what to make of them. That was an awful lot to take in. The whole day. The dinner. He stood at the door, staring too long, then opened it up. His hand went on the doorframe as he turned to look at Luke. “Me too.” Because he did. He had one of the best days he could remember. “So. Walk outside the stadium, roughing in with a protector. Okay. Got it.” He smiled that lopsided grin and disappeared inside before he could say something stupid.

“Hey Jerry.” Hayden slowed their walk as they approached the head patrolman. “We’re here to do some maneuvering and mandatory leave.” He laughed, because it really was kind of funny when they were outside of the tragedy of the moment. “You know how Jacob is. Doctor’s orders for Josh’s entire team to take tomorrow off. They had a rough day out there today.” He squeezed Josh’s hand. “But also, we’re here to talk about swapping some men around. Josh and Soren have Kaiden and Theophilus in their group already, and we would like to put Luke on there too.” He said this with a smile but also with the authority that he held without question. ​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Jacob was one who would give the hard advice, to anyone who asked him. And he'd always give it to his husband, especially when he needed it like he did today. He smiled as they laid on the bed, and grinned when he was pulled and he moved to be close to Soren, feeling those arms wrap around him. He heard that question, and the just barely kiss to his lower lip. "I can do that for you my love." He said as he shifted so he could pin Soren on his back and kissed him deeply. Letting his love distract his husband.

Luke looked at Ravi and smiled, even as they were at his door. He watched him for a moment, hearing his words and saw that lopsided grin on Ravi's face. "See you tomorrow." He said as he watched Ravi disappear. He couldn't stop the smile from staying on his face as he laughed and headed for his own room.

Jerry looked at Josh and Hayden, listening as he chuckled, hearing Hayden explain. "Of course, I know how Jacob is. A fantastic head medic and I understand. You had the hospital route right?" Jerry asked as Josh nodded with a smile as he felt the squeeze to his hand. "Ok, so I've got Josh's team off tomorrow for mandatory day off from the medics, and I've got Luke moving from Jameson's team and onto yours. Anything else?" Jerry asked, tilting his head as Josh shook his head. "I think that's it, thanks Jerry. I appreciate it." Josh said as Jerry nodded. He knew Hayden had authority above him, and while he would've listened anyway and done it, he also did it because he liked the both of them. "Luke will start with your team the day after tomorrow. Take the day to relax, you both deserve it."​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

Ravi found himself walking almost aimlessly into the room. Leo was the first to catch his attention. “So, you got a new friend?” Ravi looked over at him, hands in his pockets, and shrugged. Leo grunted. “Clearly he’s made an impression. You were with him all day.” Ravi shrugged again, his little smile still dancing across his lips. “And you’re going on a walk outside the stadium tomorrow?” If he continued shrugging, his shoulders were going to fall apart. Leo laughed. “He’s got you doing things on your day off that aren’t work or building random things. That right there is something special. None of us can do that.” Ravi plopped onto the bed beside Leo and awkwardly looked anywhere else. “He’s nice.” Leo punched his arm. “Okay, sure. You tell yourself that.” Ravi sheepishly smiled. Yeah, today was the beginning of a whole new life.

Hayden waited as Jerry worked out the schedules. “Thank you. We certainly do need the day.” This day was one of the roughest. There was a part of him that wished that he could have been there with the rest of his family as they had to go through the day, though he did not see how he could possibly have been there. Instead, all he could do was be there for Josh now. He gently tugged on his hand to pull him away and the direction of this room. ​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Josh smiled at Jerry, happy that they were able to shift the schedules. "Thanks Jerry." Josh said, smiling at him as he felt the gentle tug on his hand. "You're welcome guys!" He said, waving to them as Josh turned to head out of the room with Hayden. "Alright, now we go find the rest of the group." Josh said, squeezing the hand that held his. "Thank you for coming with me my love." He said softly, looking at Hayden as they walked down the hall.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

Hayden nodded to Jerry as they left the room to find the rest of the men to let them know what was going on. He smiled at his husband. “Of course. Where else would I ever want to be?” He gently leaned into him as they walked. No where. There was not a single place that Hayden ever wanted to be more than at Josh’s side. Even when things were bad between them, he still always wanted to be with him. Always.​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Josh looked at Hayden and smiled as he felt him gently lean into him. "I would hope nowhere else." He admitted as they walked. He knew he'd messed up in the beginning of their engagement, and early part of their marriage, and he was glad that his husband was so wonderful that they were able to finally try and reconnect. He headed for the rooms, knowing which ones were the last three of his group. "We've got three men to tell and then we can head to bed ourselves." Josh said softly as he flicked his gaze to Hayden.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

“Nowhere else,” Hayden assured him as they walked. He would always want to be with Josh. He loved Kai, and he would choose to be with him almost every time, but Joshua was still his person. They were two halves of one whole. Their pieces may have been a bit disfigured for a while. Not anymore. They were getting back to good. He wanted to keep it that way. “Lead the way.” Hayden knew a lot about a lot of things, and this was not one of them. He did not have the capability of learning where every person was in this place. If something happened and he needed to find these men, he had other means of determining that.​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Josh felt a big smile on his face as he heard that assurance. It made him so happy to hear that. He was happy they were working on getting back to the good that he missed instead of the bad that had been the last twenty-one years. He heard Hayden and nodded. He was thankful that two of his group were in one room and the third was two rooms down. "Alright." He said as they came to the first door, Josh knocked and Pierre opened it, looking at him. "Joshua?" He asked and Josh smiled. "We're giving everyone the day off tomorrow. Relax for the day." HE said as Pierre nodded and shut the door. "Two down, one left. Then bedtime cuddles." Josh said, smiling as he turned to head down the hall. ​

 

[icedthemoon]

Ezekiel Finch, Theophilus Sharpe, and Ravi Akuna (and also the Smith Clan)
Seraphite Warrior, WLF Members | 26, 22, 23 | Current location ;; Washington

Hayden stayed there beside Josh, ready to do whatever he needed to support him as they went. With this task, he was not necessary in any other way than being there. They walked down the hall to the next room. Hayden thought he could be useful and knocked on the door. A man opened it with a curious expression. “Uh… Hayden? Oh, Josh?” That was probably a bit strange to have a visit from these two at this strange hour. “We just came by to tell you that everyone in your patrol group is getting the day off tomorrow. I know it’s a bit last minute, but you deserve it.” He smiled as sweetly as he used to. “Take it easy, okay?” The man seemed a bit shocked. He blinked and then grinned. “Yeah? Okay, thanks.” He nodded to them and closed the door. Hayden started walking. “Come my love. I would like to no longer be on my feet.”​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Kaiden Lachlan, Alexander Brennan and Luke Smith (along with the Smith Clan)
WLF Member, Young Seraphite Warrior, WLF Member | 23, 16, 19 | Current location ;; Washington

Josh stood beside Hayden as they made it to the second door, and he had a warm smile on his face as he watched his husband explain as to why they were knocking. He saw that sweet smile on his husband's face and it made him fall in love with him all over again. Once they finished speaking to him, he heard Hayden and nodded. "I think that's a wonderful idea. Let's head back to our room, I want to lay down with you, get us off our feet and not have to worry about the world for a while." Josh admitted as he led them towards their room. He opened the door, and once they were inside, he locked the door behind them, scooping Hayden in his arms and smiled, walking them over to the bed and set him down on it. "Better my love? Now that you're off your feet?"​