Fantasy ☾ eclipse of the heart.| (syntra + starboob = synboob.)

[Syntra]

…sheesh. What did people have against wanton murder, anyway? When it was Edwardina who desired blood, it was ‘hot’ and ‘sensual,’ but the second Selene bared her fangs, everyone forgot all about that! How was that fair, hmm? Double standards much? (She wasn’t even being greedy about it, mind you-- according to the traditions of old, moon should be bathed in the blood of sacrifices, till its very light was tinged red. Did you see her demanding it? Or a mere fraction of it, even? No! Selene only wanted to spill a little bit of blood, as a treat, and, illogically, the world was hellbent on denying her that catharsis. Why? What was there to be gained by antagonizing her? The roles had been determined at the very beginning of their performance, and she had done nothing but played her part. How was it her fault that Sol didn’t like the director’s vision, hmm? …puppets they were, oh yes, dancing on the strings of their mothers’, and their mothers’ before them. Why, then, was Sol acting as if she’d somehow betrayed her? That would be like being oh so surprised that your cow indeed gave you milk instead of, uhh, peanut butter ice-cream! A note for later: find out what this ‘ice-cream’ is, and acquire heaps of it. Despite knowing not what it was made of, it sounded positively delicious, and the princess could tell it had the potential to be one of those… hmm, what was the technical term? Ah, yes, emotional support food! And her emotions did need to be supported, big time.) “Cease this nonsense at once, Sol!” the moon princess shouted. “It is my right to put this wicked shrew back in her place. Do you think this conduct to be acceptable? Good for you, but I don’t. I shall never accept mediocrity. Each and every servant should know what I want at all times-- failing to do so shows a staggering lack of self-awareness!”

“Oh, Christ,” the manager rolled her eyes, “that’s the third time I’ve heard this, this week alone. Where do these idiots keep crawling out of? Fucking medieval Europe? Not even medieval Europeans liked medieval Europe, man. That was why they had all those revolutions and shit!”

“Silence!” Selene pursed her lips. “I shall deal with you personally once I remove this pitiful worm from existence. And you, girl,” she turned to her terrified victim, grabbing her by the shoulders, “I shall ask you once more. This may be your redemption arc if you seize the opportunity, so pay attention. What is the most delicious food that you can offer to me? Consider carefully whether you want to be a cowardly fence sitter, for your life shall depend on it!”

“I… I don’t know,” the girl cried. “Everything tastes great around here. You cannot make me choose-- that would be like deciding which one of my daughters I love more!”

“That would be a relevant question, too,” Selene frowned. “People enjoy different personalities, and children tend to have those. To pretend that you don’t prefer one over the other is just succumbing to peer pressure, if you ask me. Who are you trying to deceive here, hmm? Me, or yourself?” Either way, it was obvious to the moon princess that the woman was doomed to mediocrity-- fated to follow all the safe paths, oh so distant from the predators that might have challenged her. Very well, then! Very well. Squeezing the life out of her mushy, fragile body would be a noble deed, actually, for at least the Earth would...

Ah, damn. Did Sol have no concept of boundaries? Leaving one's victims unkilled wasn't a good look, and Selene did not wish to cultivate such a reputation for herself. Just, what would happen if the rumors spread? Would they consider her to be a spineless hippie now? Ah, by the moon, the prospect was so horrible that she felt like jumping out of her skin! (...although, hmm, maybe making a coat out of Sol's skin would have been the better response here. Wouldn't it be an oh so glorious garment? A symbol of her victory, so dazzlingly bright that it could not be denied!)

"Don't be like that, Sol," Selene pursed her lips. "The woman was only an earthling. Why, pray tell, should I feel sympathy for one who is so below us? That makes no sense-- the eagle also doesn't pity the mouse that it tears apart. Why would you want me to defy the natural order of things?" The answer to that, of course, was obvious: because she was Sol, and half of Sol's personality was sticking her nose where it didn't belong!

...speaking about that, though? If Selene wasn't terribly mistaken, she could hear a quiet 'psssht,' in the background, much like the whispering of the rain. What on Earth...? "Hey, you two," the person shouted, apparently tired of being cryptic. Judging by the rustling, she must have emerged out of some bush, which, disgusting! Did the woman not know how many parasites dwelled in those ugly discount trees, just waiting for the next unsuspecting victim?

"A little bird told me that you'd like to meet Holy Meyer. Well, worry not! Our Lady is holding a convention now, but given that she's kinda wanted in 71 states for her crimes against literature..." uh, what? "...I have to ascertain that you are true fans first. I mean, not to cast doubt on you right out of the gate, but you wouldn't believe the amount of incidents we've had! Some psycho has tried to peel her face off and eat it for breakfast once-- nasty business, really. We were fortunate that Robo Edwardina was able to save the day! But," she cleared her throat, "I'm not gonna waste your time on those old, boring stories. I'm sure you want to hear more about your task!" she announced, in the tone of a telemarketer who was absolutely convinced that the overpriced knives she was selling would, like, totally change your life for the better, dude. "I want you to compose a poem about your favorite ship. Show me that your heart burns with love for it, and you shall be granted your passage!"

 

[starboob]

Sol would like to believe that her not-friend/indentured companion is capable of rehabilitation of her murderous ways, but if this is her so called nature then the sunbeam is not so sure that it is even worth trying. It's best to accept Selene as she is, because she would want Selene to accept her the way she is, but Selene makes it really freaking hard when she keeps embarrassing Sol! (She is slowly starting to realize that this is probably part of her mom's master plan; make Sol too embarrassed to adventure so that she stays locked inside the highest room in the tallest tower and learns proper etiquette. How devious. How utterly evil. How incredibly typical. Knowing this, she will not let her mom use psychology against her! She will embrace Selene's weirdo nature, so long as no innocents are harmed in the making of their antics. Take that, Helia!) "Alright, Selene, fine you're a wolf girl. I understand that now. Took me a couple of weeks, but I'm there now. I won't try to convince you otherwise. However, if you're going to murder people they need to actually deserve it. The combination KFC/Taco Bell employees are not paid enough to be murdered. In the future, we can go to upper management and deliver the complaints personally." See! Sol is totally capable of compromise. She still doesn't know how she feels about murder, but maybe she should think of it differently? Hmm. Hmm. An expression of aggression? Maybe that will work. She will have to workshop this some more.

"Anyway, I guess you don't have to care about all Earth-people. Some of them are buttholes. Like, do you remember Alexis Rodríguez? She was sooo mean just because she got boobs in fifth grade. Like, congratz? Who cares that the growth hormones in our food got to you first?" Sol rolls her eyes, not at all catching that she has slipped in an anecdote that makes almost zero sense since Sol and Selene never attended a fifth grade together. Nope! Sol, at least, has only ever had private lessons with no level up options unless you count Helia's exponentially increasing disappointment in her heir after each quarterly review. (Sol doesn't.) "But underpaid employees, while on the clock, should get a free pass. Like, emotional labor is way too freaking taxing to deal with wolf-girls with anger issues and a superiority complex."

"Plus," Sol puts her hands on her hips, "I care about Earthlings because I want them to be goddess-loving, not goddess-fearing. I want them to know that they've got at least one friend in the sky," she says, not pointedly at all, "They'll feel my warmth and think, 'Wow Sol sure is a sweetie pie––she's so pretty, smart, funny, awesome, and always remembers my birthday! Golly, what an inspiration to the kids! Best Sun ever, 13/10.'" Yup, mhm, that is genuinely all Sol wants to do with her destiny. Spreading peace, love, and rock & roll! Sick guitar riff.

"Since food was a total disaster adventure let's see if we can find some normie weed." (The space stuff that Polaris gave her was way too strong and she ended up stoned for 72 hours. Would have been fun had she been prepared/had she her mom not discovered her stoned out of her mind crying over a perfect avocado.) Though before Sol can start them on their next adventure, a dork of a woman appears from a bush. 'Alright, seriously what has happened to the Earth? I do not remember it being this bizarre. Not that I remember it at all.'

"First of all, everyone knows there are only 25 states," not true, but Sol had only memorized 25 states previously, "And I'm really having trouble with, like, half of what you said. I'm not really interested in going to convention on account of not being a nerd. We were just going to pick up a copy at a book store."

"What part of wanted for crimes against literature do you not understand?" the fangirl scoffs, "The books have been pulled from every shelf, along with the Harriet Potter series and every book written in French per the royal decree of Y- and X-keysmash." Alright, Sol is all for practical jokes, but she doesn't think this clown is joking. "The only way to get a holy copy is by coming to the convention. Now, before I get the idea that you both are rotten sinners, recite a poem for your favorite ship! There are no wrong answers except for anything that includes Emory or Jaspina. Yuck!"

Okay, Sol kind of wouldn't mind if Selene used her Violence is the answer tactics right about now. Maybe if she just turns around, she can keep her morals intact? This is just getting too weird and this is Sol we're talking about here. Then again, she did make a promise to a worm, so if this is the only way to fulfill that promise? Fine. She will play along. Big sigh. "Alright, but I'm no poet so you have to be nice about this." She clears her throat and then let the words flow through her.

Sweet pale skin, as lifeless as a hospital's wall
Yet glimmers like glitter glue sticky on my fingys
How can one cut from such cold marble
Start such a fire in my loins? Garble.

When you left Forks, I spooned your gf
But it was a knife to my heart knowing
that it was she whomst you yearned
I never did anything for this to earn

Notice, Edwardina, that I am your one
Forget about Bella and her pasta
My noodles are yours to slurp
I can treat you better, you twerp.

Me, Jacobrina.
When will your gold eyes see
That it is me?

 

[Syntra]

Usually, Selene preferred precision in her way of speaking. There were so many words, after all, and their meanings were so, so nuanced-- their ancestors had polished them over the centuries, and gifted them to them along with the language. Not utilizing them effectively, then, spoke of dull wit and negligence that was almost criminal! Still, regardless of that? Regardless of that, the moon daughter could only describe this situation with an ‘oof.’ (Was the universe ending, or something? Because, once again, Selene found herself agreeing with Sol, the queen of dumbasses. Conventions, as everyone knew, were for a) people with questionable hygienic habits, b) nerds, c) women too awkward for dating sites, and no, the moon daughter didn’t belong to either of those groups! …well, alright, maybe she wouldn’t have gone for a dating site, either, but that was only true because she had too much dignity for such… such lowly pursuits. Who even cared about constructs like love, anyway? A proper marriage was built in convenience, so that one might become another link in a chain of two great houses. Her marriage would be like that, Selene knew, and she simply couldn’t wait. Ah, yes, yes! If nothing else, one could count on Luna not to besmirch her daughter’s honor with an unworthy suitor-- more than likely, the moon princess would marry one of the Great Signs, and that… that would open more doors for her than you could imagine, really. How sweet it would be, to consume their essence? To bathe herself in it, like the maidens of old bathed in starlight?)

…anyway, no, Selene wasn’t at all interested in acquiring that stupid book. How pathetic did you have to be, to a) dream up a fantasy of an ~ideal woman~ because your own wife looked like a burning garbage heap, b) to then publish the said fantasy for all the world to see? No, couldn’t be Selene! Truly, in this post-apocalyptic hellscape, pride appeared to be a rare resource-- rarer than diamonds themselves, judging by the earthlings’ behavior. “Don’t you think that your Holy Meyer should compose a ballad for us, and not vice versa?” Selene folded her arms on her chest. “I mean, we are princesses of the great celestial courts. Who is she, anyway? Some sort of sentient stain? Smeyer sounds suspiciously like smear, if you ask me, and that cannot be a coincidence. I have always been told that your name is your fate, and it seems like she definitely fits the bill!”

If the fangirl had anything to say to the moon princess’ tirade, though, she kept it to herself-- mostly because she appeared to be absolutely enraptured by Sol’s poem. “Ah, splendid, splendid!” she clapped, her eyes full of happy tears. “The fire of shipping burns bright in your hearts, indeed. It has been a long, long time since I saw devotion this utterly dazzling, actually! Almost like Edwardina’s skin… although, of course, nothing is more dazzling than Edwardina. Nothing,” the woman said, in a way that suggested that contesting the point would equal to a declaration of war. (Ugh, fans. Why did all of them seem to think that enjoying a piece of media could make up for them not having a personality of their own? ‘Ooo, look at me, I’m Loser McLoserFace and I’m superior because I spend my days making astrological charts for fictional characters!’ How utterly sad, really. Instead of nonsense like that, they should go do what every well-adjusted did-- namely, flaying their enemies alive. That, at least, produced actual results!)

“Alright, you are officially invited to our wonderful convention. Get ready to have your socks blown off!” The woman’s definition of the word ‘invited’ seemed to be rather curious, too-- Selene had lived under the impression that you could refuse an invitation, but nooo, that wasn’t what they got. Instead, a glittery portal emerged from the ground and they were sucked in, as if it was nothing but an oversized vacuum cleaner! (…maybe because the series itself sucked? Ah, by the moon, it really looked like Sol’s stupidity was contagious! Once she escaped the sun court, the moon princess would have to get her brain checked for worms.)

“I swear,” Selene frowned when a different portal spat them out, “if this turns into another inane adventure, I will--”

“Ladies and ladies!” an obnoxious voice stabbed her right into the brain, and in that moment, Selene just knew that this woman had to be the (in)famous Meyer, “I welcome you here, at this holy convention.” …was she standing on some kind of stage? Judging by the acoustics, the moon princess thought so-- the wind caressed their face gently, though, and so they must have been standing outside.

“The enemies of Real LoveTM wished to silence me, and yet here I am-- its first apostle. Yes, it’s me, the Holy Meyer!” A thousand of voices cried out in sheer rapture, and in that moment? Well, roughly in that moment, Selene lost the already pitiful remains of her will to live. Just, what was this, even? For what had Luna punished her so, in bringing her forth into this rotten world? “The good news is,” the woman smiled, “that I have what you all came for. Twilight, the one and only! The bad news, however, is that the last publishing house that was still loyal to me was seized by the Swiss army. ‘Neutral’ my ass, really,” she scoffed. “The point is, I only have one (1) book left to give to you. Yeah, it’s a terrible tragedy, blah blah blah, but I decided to use this opportunity to make our celebration a little more interesting. We will have a good, old-fashioned deathmatch, where the last woman standing takes it all!” she shouted. “Let blood flow freely, and feed their own entrails to your lesser peers. Prove to me who the biggest Twilight fan is, now and always!”

 

[starboob]

"Okaaaay," Sol mutters, her face half squinched up in utter confusion and bafflement once they arrive to the convention. Unlike the last time they were burped out of a magic portal, this place is significantly less appealing than the moon court. Everywhere, as far as her black eyes can see, there are nerds. Nerds in fedoras. Nerds in glitter. Nerds with fangs. Nerds with shirts that read, 'Team ______.' There are nerds getting it on (good for them). Nerds having a heated debate over some inconsequential detail of the series. Honestly, it's nerd overload and Sol is not sure how much more of this she can physically take before she starts frothing at the mouth like these weirdos. Like, Sol generally believes that she is an accepting and nonjudgmental person but these Twilight stans are severely testing her limits. She purses her lips together, forming a thin line, and then turns to Selene to whisper, "This is really weird. I kind of regret agreeing to this mission. Wanna dip?" Like, yeah, maybe a few seconds ago she had thought it was important to do right by Alfie, her brand new bookworm friend, but then she witnessed just what she would be enabling and has come to think better of it. Perhaps it's time for Alfie to find a different problematic book series to enjoy. (Then again, maybe Sol doesn't want to find out what's worse than Twilight.) "I am starting to think that coming to retrieve this book was an entire mistake. I say, we leave and find a better use of our time, like seeing who can overcome brain freeze the fastest."

With that proposal, Sol begins scanning the space for a proper exit which isn't that hard since the convention, for whatever reason, is being held outdoors. So, really, she is just identifying the gaps in the crowd that she and Selene can take advantage of. Naturally, Sol's attention stolen from her when the Holy Meyer appears on stage, emerging from a thick fog complete with a laser light show. (Immediately, Sol recognizes Smearer is a villain. She has watched enough movies to know that the coolest entrances are only ever reserved for villains. Not that a D-list villain like Smearer scares Sol, because Sol already knows she is a A++ hero, it just feels silly if she were not to recognize an enemy when she sees one.) When the villain known as Smearer announces The Hunger Games competition for one of the worst pieces of literature ever published? Sol instinctively grabs onto Selene's arm before she can dive headfirst into what is actually turning out to be one of the wimpiest fights ever. (And this is coming from Sol, wimp extraordinaire, but even she knows poor form when she sees it.) "Alright, I know murder is literally your thing and I know I also said we could just dip, but I had a lightbulb. Wanna just steal the book? Smearer isn't even looking and it's just sitting right there!" Sol points to the lone book hanging out on stage while an excited Smearer cheers on different fans. "Oh, wait... You can't see where I'm pointing. Just trust me, she's definitely not going to notice. Besides, who even wants to be known as the biggest Twilight fan? That's, like, more embarrassing than being the Governor of Kentucklevannia."

"Anyway," she continues, definitely trying to work on her argument for why Selene should not murder these nerds even if they might deserve it for having extremely poor taste, "Getting your claws dirty over them would be totally embarrassing. Like, you're obvi better than them and it would be a waste of your precious time. There are more impressive villains to take down and after the Mama Corn? Do you really want to downgrade?" Hmm, that ought to do it, but one can never be too sure. Not with Selene. Never with Selene. After all, her counterpart could very well think something totally backwards like Sol trying to steal all of the glory or something. It wouldn't make sense, like at all, but her not-friend seems to be filled with more illogic than logic and yet she can tie it together to make look like logic. "Anyway, after we're done with this wanna see if Flamin' Hot Cheetos still dye poop red? Or we can see if our time capsule is still buried by the great oak tree behind the school. I think I put some doobie in there and I'm pretty sure doobie doesn't go bad."

However, rather than bank on Selene agreeing to not murder nerds, Sol decides to gun it for the book while the nerds and Smearer are distracted. As she weaves through the crowd, a few fans try to challenge her and she simply roots them into place before they can attempt a slap fight, as most of the fighting is slap fighting with only a few brawls here and there. It's honestly a wholly pathetic and Sol finds herself embarrassed on behalf of them. She doesn't even like fighting and she can admit that this is just Sad. 'Yeesh, they're going to sooner throw their backs out than throw hands with such poor form.' Once she's next to the stage, she climbs up onto to it and grabs the book. "Easy peasy lemo––"

A colossal robo-babe, if Sol were to be honest, slaps a cold hand down on Sol's neck and holds her firmly in place. Then, none other than the Holy Meyer appears from behind the robo-babe and asks, "And just what do you think you're doing, you fake fan?"

"Ah, haha, I just wanted to make sure it's real... Hey, why did you have Jacobrina fall in love with Nessie at the end? Don't you think that's a little weird?"

"I––what?! How dare you question my canon! I gave everyone a happy ending to make up for this shit world," Smearer snarls, "You shall be executed for your crimes against True Love! Robo Edwardina, slay this unworthy worm and make sure to send her to straight Hell."

 

[Syntra]

Ahahaha! Alright, alright. If those nerds wanted to play with fire, then Selene would show them just how brightly her flame burned-- that the moon’s silvery grace didn’t mean that she wasn’t as sharp as a blade, and as cruel as winter. All of them would fall before her, like blades of grass before a scythe! (…or before a lawnmower, really, but the machine lacked all that fun, fun imagery. Who if not Selene was fit to accept the role of the grim reaper, after all? The mistress of death? Nobody, she knew that with absolute certainty. Foolishness has led you here, the moon princess thought, and foolishness will be your downfall, too. A rather poetic ending, wasn’t it? Maybe a little too poetic for them to appreciate, considering that they unironically thought that Twilight was good for anything else but kindling, though hey, not Selene’s fault! Casting pearls before swine may have been her own brand of foolishness, the princess did admit to that, but… well, she was simply way too classy to lower herself to their level, really. She couldn’t make herself stupid, no more than an eagle could transform into a fly!) “If this is the hill you want to die on,” the moon princess smirked, “then let me be the one to dig your grave.”

With a quiet ssss, the silver claws covered her hands, and their anticipation merged with her own. (‘Feed us,’ they demanded, sending a pleasant shiver down her spine. ‘Show them who you are-- who you were made to be. Write their stories in blood, rather than ink. Make them matter, for once in their miserable, pathetic lives.’ Which, yes, Selene would be more than happy to do exactly that!) The moon princess took in all the scents, ready to choose her first victim, and then… wow. Then Sol offered a reasonable argument, contrary to every natural law in existence! What was this? Had she gotten stuck in her personal version of Matrix, or something? Because, if so, it was glitching so hard that the whole server was probably going up in flames at this very moment! …and, no, Selene didn’t know what any of that meant. Perhaps she would have thought about it harder had it not been for the, you know, unprecedented event of the sun heiress actually making sense, but alas! Sol eclipsed those thoughts, much like the sun that she was.

“I… I have to admit that stealing sounds like a sound strategy.” From an insufferable goody two shoes like her, it had come off as a shock, though frankly? Selene wasn’t about to complain. No, that would have been like complaining about receiving five fresh corpses to dismember instead of the one you had ordered! “I do appreciate you admitting that you were wrong, too. That you can see your own mistake…” elevates you above the average baboon “…shows the quality of your character, indeed.” Actually, perhaps Sol wasn’t entirely hopeless? It was true, after all, that someone like Selene shouldn’t have to dirty her hands with common trash-- for them, such a death would have been way too good. On account of being nerds, they deserved to die in obscurity, shoved in some locker! Well, I suspect lockers are in short supply here, but being trampled to death by other nerds is almost as good. Fine, then! They’d secure the stupid book and disappear, faster than most people could say ‘Renesmee is a mouthful.’ Once again, they’d find themselves at the sun court, and the moon princess would weave her web of-- ah, damn. What was that terrifying aura, even? It might as well have grabbed her by the throat, given how overwhelming it felt!

Incapable of not spoiling her own inane twists, Smearer babbled something about ‘Robo Edwardina,’ and… yes, that checked out. Hmm, do I let her die here? A tempting thought, perhaps, but the prospect soured to her once she realized that that would be giving Smeyer exactly what she wanted. Just, ugh! (Was that what the famous trolley dilemma was about? Ah, how cruel it was, to have to choose between two sets of victims instead of slaying them all! The one who had designed the test must have been a true sadist, doubtlessly.) “To hell with it,” the moon princess uttered. “Prepare to die, you worthless abomination! Spoiler alert: stalking your girlfriend is neither romantic nor edgy. Had you actually murdered her enemies for her, I might have bought that love story, but what you did? Boring. Pedestrian. Pathetic!”

“What?!” Smeyer shouted. “Robo Edwardina, slay that one first. I cannot believe that such wet blankets have infiltrated my Convention of Love! Don’t you understand that ethics, common decency and restraining orders become irrelevant in the face of True PassionTM?”

Robo Edwardina, however, fell on her knees, and broke out into tears. “I… she’s right!” the robot wailed, sparkles of electricity appearing where the water had landed. (Why had Smearer installed that functionality, again?) “I am a worthless, ugly monster. I only live to kill, and can’t even do well by my own girlfriend! Never will I see the gates of heaven, which is a fate that I very much dese--” Sighing, Selene chopped the robot’s head off, only to smirk when it fell on the ground with a loud thud. “There, I pulled it out of its misery. Are we quite done here? Sol, go grab that stupid book so that we can get this over with.”

“No, no, no! This cannot be… cannot be… filthy blasphemers!” Smeyer shouted, like the picture of sanity she was. “My epic love story wasn’t supposed to end in this way. Come on, where’s my editor when I need her? This section needs to be erased, I say. No… no, Robo Bella, stay back!” …what? Selene could hardly finish that thought, however, before something grabbed her, and embraced her tightly with its steely arms. “My heroine,” a sweet voice cooed into her ear. “Was it you who saved me from the wretched Edwardina? I mean, I did love her, but only because she was the biggest badass around,” Bella admitted. “Swooning over unhealthy power dynamics is pretty much my entire personality, so like, can you blame me? Anyway, now I love you, so you gotta marry me. Sorry, I don’t make the rules around here. You won’t mind if I claim your friend here, would you?” she turned to Sol. “You can even be our maid of honor, if you’d like.”

 

[starboob]

Dying by a robot’s hand, let alone a robot version of Edwardina, had not been covered in Sol’s religious viewership of 1000 Ways to Die and thus she is wholly unprepared for this situation. (Well, she’s also underprepared because she’s only just learned what a robot is, who Edwardina is, and doesn’t totally know whether or not 1000 Ways to Die is a real series or another brain glitch in the continuity errors that make up her entire childhood/adolescences. Those, however, are mysteries for a later Sol to deal with. Right now she must figure out how to yoink herself out of this sitch, regroup with Selene, and then see if she can convince her to agree to at least 6 more Earth Adventures which Selene will probably haggle down to 2-3 and that? That Sol can totally live with.) Okay, so she’s dealing with a robot and a disgraced best selling author and she, herself, is a young goddess. The odds are basically built for to always win when dealing with a robo and flesh mortal! Now, what are the ethics behind ending a robot’s life? Clearly this robot has some advanced AI going for it and if Sol remembers correctly, AI = Artificial Intelligence. Artificial is just a smash of ‘art’ and ‘ficial,’ ‘ficial’ clearly has some fiction-y roots that probs mean it’s fake... so Robo-Edwardina? She’s fake art smart. Mhm! Taking her out of comiss—-

Oh, naturally Selene beat her to murder. She’s somewhat relieved and also entirely shocked since Selene is 2-0 on trying to have her killed. Actually, she’s more like 2-2 now since Selene did save her from the moonicorns and now this babe of a robot. If this pattern continues, she’ll need to watch out for the next event that will threaten to K.O. her permanently as Selene will probs be back on her get Sol murdered setting. “Shucks, I really thought I was going to be on my own for that one. Thanks, Selene ‘Sometimes Sol’s Saver’ Silver. Did you like my alliteration—“

Ah, crap. There’s a robot Bella, too? That must mean... Yep, just off to the side of the stage Sol sports the rest of the Cullens plus Jacobrina in their shiny robo glory. Yeesh, the CS/engineering student who made Smearer those does not deserve the brain she was given. Like, just because you can doesn’t mean you should! Have science nerds learned nada from the Jurassic Park franchise? “Y’know, robo-Bella, as much as I love a good wedding,” mostly for the after parties, “I’m really not down for this. Don’t you see that you’re just following robo-Edwardina’s footsteps by being weirdly into a girl for no discernible reason? Like, you don’t even know Selene’s personality,” which is probably for the better, “and have not made one single attempt to woo her! Sorry, mate, I totally object to this wedding.”

“But I know everything I need to know! She’s badass and I have just learned that her name is Selene. She also looks at me murderously like my once love, Edwardina.”

“Yikes, yikes, yikes! Girl, you can do so much better than that! Personally, I always thought you could have had some major girlbossery if you just focused on your friendship with Alice and Rosalie and took a little break from love. You've been through so much and I think you deserve some serious Bella-time. Go eat some pasta, eata da spicy meatballs, and play some Maria Kart. It'll do you some good." She finishes her little speech by patting robo-Bella on the shoulder and gently, she pries Selene away from the robo-grip. This robo, like her dead-ex, also begins to cry, shrieking about how vapid she is or something and Sol takes some pity on her flips her switch to the off position. Then she kicks her off the stage. "Yeah, she was hopeless." Sol then turns to the stunned Smearer.

"So do you want to lose robo-Jacobrina next or what?" Sol asks, quirking her brow while the other robos seems to shuffle in place behind their creator. Then, shockingly, Nessie cries, "Why would you make us all like this?! I don't want to be in love with Jacobrina! I want to become an astronaut!" The others also begin to lament about their poor characterization and how Smearer could have done so much better had she just hired a ghost writer and, finally, they all begin to short-circuit and eventually catch on fire. Much to the astonishment of, well, everyone. See, the (pathetic) fighting has since stopped and everyone's mouth is agape as they watch the robo's burn. It's dead silent. That is until Sol cheers, "Woohoo!! Free thinkers!" and as she does so she punches her arms into the air, accidentally lets go of the last surviving copy of Twilight, and, yep! You guessed it, it lands in the fire. "Oops..."

Blah, blah, blah, everyone is screaming at Sol––what's new––and the angry mob of nerds are trying to climb on stage but their total lack of upper body strength is making that impossible. "No worries, Selene, I got this!" She smiles at her companion, totally not alarmed by the army of nerds, because nerds don't scare her and Sol has a plan. She takes the magic compass from her titty pouch, grabs Selene's arm, and says, "Twinkle, twinkle, little star, take us to the school house yard!" Blip!

"Dude," Sol groans, once they land on a flat patch of hardened, scorched earth, "I hope I put some snackies in that time capsule, because ya girl is starving." She decides to not blame this on Selene, but it would be fair since the combination KFC/Taco Bell fiasco is the reason their bellies are not full of questionable food and baja blasts. She is choosing peace for the time being. "Hey, do you remember this place being, uhh, burnt to a crisp?" Because once Sol gets her bearings, it's very clear something happened to the school as all that remains is a melted playground. The oak where their time capsule is buried is even split in two as if struck by lightning. Um, Sol decides to edit out all the evidence of charred corpses. "Mmm... must be global climate change?"

 

[Syntra]

The apocalypse must have been in full swing by now, because Selene found herself agreeing with Sol again. No, she didn’t want to marry a wet blanket from a terrible literary series! Even if she hadn’t been promised to another, the moon princess had greater goals than that, dammit. “Let me go, you living stain on the human culture,” she complained, internally cursing Bella’s iron grip. (Why did she need such a strength, anyway? Wasn’t her only job to whine in the corner why Edwardina did all the cool stuff, or something? To Selene, it just seemed like a huge waste of materials and brainpower. …couldn’t she have been a dog, come to think of it? The romance parts would have been more than icky, that was for sure, but it wasn’t as if that had ever stopped Smearer before. In fact, at least she would finally have a true, no holds barred ~forbidden romance~!) “I come from a traditional family, Miss I’d-Rather-Commit-Suicide-Than-Let-Go-In-a-Healthy-Way. If you wish to earn my hand in marriage, then go ask Luna!” And that, ladies and… ladies, was something that Selene would actually pay to see. The mere prospect of the robot approaching her mother dearest unironically? Oh, the moon princess suspected that there wasn’t enough popcorn in this world for the performance that would follow. Hmmm. Would she give her the kiss of death, I wonder? The robot had technically never been truly alive, she supposed, but that didn’t mean that she couldn’t die in a… in a memorable way, let’s say. On the contrary, shouldn’t she receive it exactly because of her deficiency? To make up for it, sort of.

Sol then delved into her epic speech, and Selene? Selene couldn’t help but smirk, to the point that her lips hurt. (Phrases like ‘Bella’ and ‘being able to do better’ in the same sentence, without any negative premodifiers? Oh, please! Not even Sol, the chronic optimist, could possibly believe such a load of nonsense. Like, there was a limit to ignorance, and while the sun heiress had managed to exceed it each and every time, Selene still believed that her brain wasn’t a bottomless abyss. Sure, the abyss was deep, so deep that no life forms could survive in it, but not completely hopeless! And recognizing Bella as the utter failure that she was was on the level of, say, solving the 1 + 1 = ? equation. …wait, wait, wait. Could that mean that the sun princess was shrewder than what Selene had given her credit for? Because, you see, if that was true, then Sol was lying. Lying, which was an act that required more than three brain cells! Hmm, hmm. That… actually suggested that she could be useful? More than a mere puppet, dancing on her strings-- more than a foot soldier, unwilling to even fart without receiving the permission to do so first. An interesting observation to be sure, though what exactly would Selene do with it? How would she utilize it? That she knew not, but an opportunity would emerge sooner or later, she knew. It always did, for those who were willing to see it! ‘Blessed, blessed. Don’t you see? Look around, dear one. Truly look, and the answers will come to you.’)

…and, as seemed to be the pattern wherever they went, everything then went to hell. Blah blah blah, tears, blah blah blah, chaos-- the usual stuff, honestly. Death followed in their footsteps, it seemed, and wasn’t that only proper? For she, Selene, was its first messenger, exercising its will with her silver claws! (Somehow, it felt proper that they should witness their end, too. The abominations never should have existed in the first place, so wasn’t this righting an old wrong? Honoring a timeless covenant? And the moon was all about that, once you looked past the initial theatrics. It was about promising yourself to a cause, with all your heart, and then honoring that promise! …something the sun was a complete stranger to, mind you. To Helia, vows were just a proof of weakness-- a loophole which might be used to exploit you, and drain you of your strength. Ah, it was eternal shame that such a woman was allowed to ruler over them!)

The loss of their beloved book seemed to turn the nerds into the cast of… well, Revenge of the Nerds, but before Selene could teach them why that was a bad idea before you learned the basics of combat, Sol blipped them out of there. Fine, fine! (Murdering people this empty wouldn’t have been fun, anyway-- in order for extinguishing lives to be meaningful, you see, your victims actually had to have a reason to live. What was sweeter than sensing their distress, after all? Than listening to their pleads, only to whisper ‘no’ and deliver the final blow? Caramel, most likely, but you couldn’t exactly murder that.)

“Ugh. Must your thoughts always revolve around matters this lowly? One would have said that, according to you, food is the only reason why you still bother to get up from your bed in the morning.” Besides, how many years ago had they buried the capsule? The earthly food went bad within the blink of an eye, so… Wait. I haven’t buried anything with her, have I? The moon princess wanted to bury her, but she was fairly certain that that a) didn’t count, b) was something entirely different! Still, Sol seemed convinced of her truth, and so Selene decided to go along with it. No harm in indulging her, right? They could dig a hole somewhere around here, realize that there indeed wasn’t anything of note, and finally go home.

“What an oppressive atmosphere,” she whispered. “A curse is reigning over this place, Sol. I cannot tell what it is exactly, but it isn’t good news. We shouldn’t stay here for longer than absolutely…” ‘necessary,’ she wanted to say, but the earth moving underneath them? Yes, that shut her up real quick. (What was this, the meeting with the primordial mothers, version 2.0? Selene still hadn’t forgiven them for being so staggeringly wrong the last time, so unless they were calling to offer an apology, she wouldn’t listen to their nonsense! But, no, it turned out that that wasn’t the case. The soil only receded so that it could… offer them a box, apparently? The box that Sol had been talking about, maybe.)

Choosing to remain silent for once, Selene knelt on the ground, overcome with a strange mix of anticipation and fearfulness. What could be waiting for them there, lurking in the darkness? And why, oh why, did it make her feel… well, almost giddy? Carefully, she reached inside and grabbed what seemed to be a piece of paper. “What’s that?” she demanded to know, before handing it to Sol. “A letter? A message for both of us, perhaps? Be so kind and read it to me, please.” The thing was, it wasn’t a letter. No, it was a picture-- a crudely drawn thing, really, with two girls as its protagonists. One of them was handing the other her heart, presumably, and the only explanation for what was happening? A large ‘I love you, Sol! You’re the best!’ scrawled underneath the scene, with a green crayon.

 

[starboob]

"Maybe my mind wouldn't be so food motivated if there were some foodies in Señorita Tummy," Sol fires back in her usual good natured way, most likely trying to see if today will be the day that her Selene will discover their abilities as banterer extraordinaries. (She really does feel like they could have the potential. Sure, sure, Selene more or less does not like Sol and Sol totally understands why; Selene has also made it clear on two occasions that she wants to kill Sol and it would be a major shame on Sol if she were to let herself be fooled again since the moon daughter clearly lacks shame. Despite all that, maybe there's a possibility that they can have some way cool/awesome rival banter that people quote later on because it's just so iconic? Sol can live in that universe. In fact, she might have to.) "Besides, food is great. What's so wrong with making it the thing that keeps you going each morning? Breakfast, after all, is the most important meal of the day; lunch is great to enjoy with lovers, that's why it starts with an L; and dinner is great for your enemies. Historically, that's where all the great poisonings and political massacres happen," at least if you belong to the Sun court. It's a fairly well documented phenomena and yet people rarely ever turn down royal dinner parties because if there isn't a good ol' murder? Then they're quite pleasant, filled with great gossip, and the alcohol is always top notch. Plus, the themes are really fun.

Anyway, Sol totally agrees with Selene that this place is mega-haunted and that they should get out of here as soon as they retrieve the time capsule. Like, it's probably not great that the entire place is burned down or that the charred logs everywhere have an eerie resemblance to human bodies. The vibes are just way off. "Yup, we can leave the second we get our time capsule. I'm pretty sure we buried it right around––" and before Sol can finish that thought? Right where Sol had been pointing, the ground opens up and reveals said time capsule! "Sick, that's convenient. Did you do that? Because that deffo wasn't me." (Maybe she should be more alarmed that the ground just seemed to know exactly what they were looking for and opened up for them. Or maybe it's a sign that the power of friendship is real! Not that her and Selene are friends, Selene made it very clear that Sol would have to work to earn that, so until Sol figures out a way around Selene's murder setting that's just not happening anytime soon. Besides, she isn't totally over her companion trying to sell her out to the primordial mothers. ...Maybe this is proof that the power of potential friendship in 5-7 years is real? That works, she guesses.)

Sol crouches down next to the pit, watches Selene take off the floral decorated shoebox top, and peers over her shoulder to look into the box. She kinda wishes she had prepped herself more for what would be inside, because it's way more overwhelming than doobie or snackies. (It's very possible Sol hadn't wanted to get her hopes up. Even if she can't remember ever burying this box with Selene and there was just a random tug in her noggin telling her to come here... she never set up expectations for what they would uncover.) More than Selene's drawing, which Sol hasn't yet looked at, there are mini-Polaroid pictures of their younger selves, smiling with missing front teeth, all staring back at Sol. Some of them they're together, posing, and others are candid shots they must have taken of each other. It feels totally unreal. Like, she always felt a cosmic connection to Selene and since meeting her she's had random feelings of some bond they must have had... and this all is her sweet, sweet vindication.

Instantaneously, the atmosphere around them brightens as Sol nearly breaks her face in half cheesing so hard at these pictures of her and Selene. "OMG, Selene you were so cute!! Like, you're still cute now, obvi, but if you could see this pics? You definitely award yourself cutest kid on the planet award." She continues to riffle through the box, but before she can get to what she must have added, Selene hands her the drawing and she takes a look at it. The sunbeam gasps in disbelief, rubs her eyes, shakes her head, and then looks at the picture again. Yeah, that's definitely not her handwriting and so it must be Selene's... The implications of this image are incredible and Sol nearly passes out––in fact, she flops backwards onto her back, holds the drawing above her head, kicks her feet rapidly, and squeals. 'I knew it, I knew it, I freaking knew it!!! Alright, Sol, you gotta be cool about this otherwise Selene is going to accuse you of being a huge liar. Be cool. Cooler than usual.'

"Well, let's just say this pretty much proves you're no Leonarda DiCaprio," she means da Vinci, "but it has enough symbolic interactionism that I can tell what you were going for. Basically, you drew a pic of us and you're giving me your heart and on the bottom you wrote, 'I love you, Sol! You're the best!' Dude, young Selene knew what was up because I am the best. Reigning champ at being the best!" Now, if only she could get adult Selene to realize that she is the best, too. (Actually, it does make her sad that adult Selene doesn't like her the way young Selene must have. She supposes she can't blame her, though. It's not like Sol has any clear recollection of the time they must have spent together. She's just going off of gut instincts. Selene must have lost her gut instincts and replaced them all with murder.) She hands the drawing back to Selene and then continues, "This thing is chock full of pics of us together, too. I guess that's weird since I don't really remember you as a kid." As she talks, she continues digging through the box and eventually finds what must have been her contribution–– friendship bracelets made out of braided thread; one is mainly cool colors and the other warm colors. A note is attached to them and Sol reads aloud, "'To the future Selene n Sol. Wear the bracelets to strength the majik of ur friendship. Pew pew,' there's a drawing of us fighting a volcano, 'Selene, ur my Goonie, my lobster, my bestest bestest bestest friend in the hole wide wurld! I wul always b ur friend.'"

"That's for you," Sol finishes, handing Selene one of the friendship bracelets, and immediately fastening hers to her wrist. "Dude, I knew there was a reason I thought you were friend shaped! It's because you were friend shaped!" Were because Sol isn't sure if Selene still is even if she really, really, really wants her to be. It's just hard to think she is or ever will be, truly, after the failed murder attempts. Then again, it's not like there are a ton of friend options available to Sol and she did enjoy the pre-murder Selene back in the moon court. She doesn't think that was entirely faked, either, so maybe she will hold out some hope? 'If she fools me thrice... then I will give up on her for good. Rule of threes and all.' "Do you have any idea why we don't remember this stuff? Ohh, wait, maybe we're being Punk'd?"

 

[Syntra]

"Food," Selene began, in a tone usually reserved for exceptionally slow children, "is merely sustenance. Fuel that keeps you going. Why would you see it as anything else? If you ask me, then all the rituals associated with it are pointless." Yes, pointless, and also decadent, in a sense. Why oh why would you choose to hold a lavish feast when so many were starving, hmm? When the scraps from your table could make not only their day, but also their entire week? Not that they didn't deserve to starve, mind you, when their misery was just the bitter fruit of their own incompetence, but Selene still found it to be... well, somewhat tasteless. Unbecoming of a queen. (Besides, ostentatious wealth often ended up being the seed of a rebellion, too. What had that one foolish woman said?'Let them eat cake?' Small wonder that they had introduced her to Ms. Guillotine, the most severe of judges! ...people this out of touch with reality deserved it, too. The crowd, you see, was a beast-- a many-faced, hungry monster, with its talons sharper than knives, and oh, woe to the one who failed to feed it!) "It just strikes me as a huge waste of time. All that energy could have been spent on more productive matters, such as, I don't know... ensuring that your enemies don't come back from the dead." ...what? They tended to do that annoyingly often, mostly because killing a celestial permanently required an amount of effort that struck her as downright unreasonable. In this economy, who even had the time to dismember people? Certainly not Selene, who had places to be!

"...cute?" the moon princess frowned, as if Sol had just announced to her that they were about to start a girl band together and tour the universe under the guise of ~spreading the message of peace.~ (A note to self: don't ever voice that thought in front of her. Ever! Not unless you want your humiliation to grow that much spicier, anyway. The prospect of those cheesy guitar solos hurt her soul bad enough, and as for the lyrics... Oh, Selene didn't even want to imagine those. The saccharine sweetness would have given her diabetes for sure, which wasn't a good diagnosis for the future ruler of the galaxy! Just, can you imagine needing an insulin shot in the middle of a villainous speech? Way to ruin the atmosphere, man.) "I have never been cute, Sol. Majestic, yes, and also staggeringly beautiful, but not cute! Cuteness as a concept was designed for... for puppies, and critters no larger than an averagely sized cat in general. To use it for the likes of me is a gross misconception." What was worse, it was inaccurate, which counted as a tremendous sin in Selene's book! Words had meanings, and only those with peanut-sized brains ignored them! "Besides, I am fairly sure I have never been a kid, either. Don't goddesses just... skip that developmental stage altogether?" That, at least, was what Luna had told her-- childhood was just a bunch of embarrassing phases strung together, after all, and it would have been downright embarrassing for a goddess to have to wear diapers. So, with a few nifty cheats, Selene had simply emerged out of the moonlight, already perfect in every conceivable way! The awkwardness-free method, indeed. (It also explained why she was missing a large chunk of her memories, didn't it? They had never existed in the first place, and so it made sense there was but a blurry stain where the earliest years of her life should have been.)

"Symbolic... interactionism?" Selene didn't think that that combination of words meant literally anything, but hey, in Sol's crazy little word, anything was possible! Perhaps she had invented her own language that sounded suspiciously like the language of their courts, except that the words carried different meanings entirely-- yes, come to think of it, that would have explained a lot. You know, like that entire speech? If the moon princess imagined that Sol was actually declaring a war on her kingdom instead, then what she was saying wasn't the prime candidate for The Greatest Nonsense of the Year award! "No, I can't say that I do," Selene shook her head. "Look, Sol, I don't think I understand any of this. Can we go over your definition of the word 'friend' again? There may be some... uh, cultural differences at play." Despite that, however? Despite that, she reached for the friendship bracelet, and fastened it to her wrist. (...don't judge, okay? The bracelet was the key to solving this mystery, so logically, she'd want to keep it close to her skin. There was no deeper purpose to the act, and those who claimed otherwise? She'd strangle them with her own damn hands! That, of course, proved that there was no denial at play, for that was how these things worked.)

'Cultural differences,' something hissed, clearly annoyed. Instinctively, Selene turned around, and... um, what was it? The aura kept shifting, like the flame of a candle in the wind, so no, the moon daughter couldn't tell what it was that was talking to them. (For some reason, however, it felt familiar-- a dream whose ending she'd never seen, perhaps, or a melody that had slipped from her mind.) 'Is that what it comes down to? What all those people died for? Every seal comes with a price, you know! I did warn you that ensuring it stays intact would... hmm, require a certain amount of energy. So, what did you think was going to happen when you disappeared? I had to take it from somewhere!' ...wait, wait, wait. The curse that was hanging over this place, could it mean that...?

 

[starboob]

"Spoken like someone who probably does not know what seasonings are," Sol mumbles under her breath. (Just, what is wrong with Selene that she cannot derive pleasure from literally anything? Is that the moon court's whole thing? Seeing who can suffer the most without complaining? If so, she might suggest that Selene rename her court Suffering McSufferville and she can become Sufferingest Queen of the Suffering Frontier. At least the Sun court knows how to party. For as much as she hates all the rules and structures and bureaucracy, the parties are not awful. The only awful ones are the ones where her mom tries to set her up with, like, forty million different suitors who are all different flavors of boring.) "Okay, my bad. You were adorable," Sol teases, knowing that her companion will probably hate that adjective as much as she hates cute. "Of course, you are staggeringly beautiful and majestic now, but as a tot? Totally and utterly adorbs. In this pic you have some kind of sauce all over your face. I bet you'd murder your wittle self for being so uncouth." Sol places the contents of the box back in their place and then stuffs the box into her bottomless bag. She's already imagining where she'll stick the pictures of their younger selves up in her room. Even if these are highly doctored photos, they give Sol a level of comfort she does not have the words to describe.

"I mean, I dunno... I definitely have memories of being kid," even if they don't make a lot of sense, "and ordinarily, I might think that this is just an example of our courts working differently but these photos? They pretty much prove you definitely had a childhood. Or there is a child with a suspiciously similar aura as you hanging out with little me in these pics, but I don't think that's it either. I can't explain it, but there's obviously a reason I was drawn here and why this box appeared as soon as we arrived. Maybe this is an episode of Punk'd, but this would be a pretty weak sausage prank so I don't think Ashley Kutcher would waste her time on this. So my theory," Sol's tone gets surprisingly serious and she even takes a pause for dramatic effect, "We're part of a magical conspiracy theory that will change the very course of the universe as we know it. Obviously." That would at least explain a lot. "I don't think we were meant to return to the courts at all, in fact. We were just supposed to stay here on earth, be friends, and maybe own a small farm together."

(Ah, just imagining that alternate life fills Sol with joy... before she realizes that is not her life and she did end up back in her court and now she has to someday lead the Sun court to eternal glory and greatness. Ugh. It would have been nice to only be the ruler of a small farm, but with this responsibility on her plate? She will just have to make do and make changes one charming smile at a time. Her small farm will have to be a side chick rather than her main hoe. Hehe.)

"Okay, well, I guess I can understand how cultural differences might come into play," since, you know, Selene is full of so much murder it would put a wolverine to shame. She probably thinks friendship is some weird keep your enemies closer shtick rather than truly enjoying someone else's company. Though, maybe not? Maybe Sol is being Selene-phobic and making a poor assumption. She did just put on the friendship bracelet and that has to mean that she does believe in something more genuine, right? Eh, maybe. Selene is too hard to read sometimes. "Friends are magical people who bring magic and joy into your life. They hype you up before dates, big events, and when you're coming out of the fitting room. They also challenge you when you have bad onions and root for you to be the best possible version of yourself! Generally, they are very trustworthy people who you would do anything for––like bury a body and cover up the evidence of their crime, because you know they'd do the ex––" act same for you, she would have finished had that, uh, visitor not shown up to ruin their little Sol/Selene time.

Sol sighs and turns around, ready to politely tell this being to leave them alone but. Hm. She's sort of at a loss for words looking up at a giant beetle creature with the face of a woman. A face that keeps changing every other word and each face looks eerily familiar to Sol but she cannot place any of them in her mind. Thoughtlessly, she reaches for Selene's hand and grips it tight for comfort. Dumbfounded, dumbstruck, Sol's mouth hangs open like she's forgotten it's totally not nice to stare. "Well, what do you have to say for yourselves? Out with it, girls!"

"I, I, I," Sol stutters, not even sure what the monster is talking about and, tbh, totally scared of it. Not that she's afraid of bugs, but when they're Kafka-ish abominations with changing faces of people she might have known? Yeah, she thinks it's reasonable to be scared. "I don't know what you're talking about? I don't know anything about a seal or the people who died. I barely remember anything about this box other than that Selene and I definitely buried it."

"Disgraceful," the abomination spits, "You girls are just as foolish and reckless now as you were then! You cannot even honor the sacrifice that your classmates and teachers made to keep your time capsule intact," wait a minute, "You threw away your friendship while we all died to preserve it's memory! How dare you!" the creature shouts, her jaw unhinging to release a swarm of hornets from her mouth. The beetle-thing then unfolds her wings from under the shell-thing and begins to kick up a storm of dirt and ash; meanwhile, the corpses behind them also start to reanimate. 'Crap.'

Sol pulls Selene up from the ground and yells, "Strategic retreat!" Because fighting murder hornets and zombies and possibly a weird cursed beetle is just really not something she wants to do today or ever. "Dunno about you," Sol huffs out as she runs, "but I think I would remember committing adolescent war crimes?"

"You cannot run, children!" the entity booms and in that moment? In that moment Sol runs straight into an invisible magic barrier, turning her nose into a blood faucet (cute).

 

[Syntra]

"Magical conspiracy theory?" Selene asked, some part of her hoping that she had misheard. That part was only a miniscule one, though-- much like an ant when compared to, say, the greatness of the stars. Duh, of course that Sol would be into conspiracy theories! She could picture the sun heiress wearing one of those ridiculous tinfoil hats and trying to convince the sheeple that, checkmate, trees had been bushes all the time, actually. All of that checked out, so why should she expect literally anything else? That would have been like thinking that milking a cow would yield wine, or that they would serve you anything but biological waste in the local McDonald's. "Don't be such a child, Sol. Everyone knows that conspiracy theories are only ever invented by people who are too dumb to walk and breathe at the same time!" The sweet irony, of course, was that they also tended to think they were the second coming of Alberta Einstein-- in their little fantasy world, the were the unsung geniuses, a step away from discovering some big secret. (If Selene had to guess why that was, she'd identify it as a survival mechanism? Realizing that they were this hopelessly dumb would probably shatter their fragile, fragile psyche.)

Then, even if Selene hadn't thought it possible, Sol came up with something even more outrageous. "What? That is your definition of a friend?" the moon princess asked, her eyes... well, not as wide as saucers, but they would have been, had they not been sewn shut. "And why, pray tell, would anyone do that? I mean, scientifically speaking, there is no reason for organisms to be this pathologically altruistic. Unless they're doing it so they can backstab you more comfortably later?" she rubbed her chin thoughtfully. "That, or they're just attempting to get on your good side because you're a princess. Yes," Selene pointed at Sol, "that's it! All those people who have treated you this way? They had something to gain from it. Remember that, Sol-- there is no such thing as receiving something in exchange for nothing. Profit is the ultimate ruler over everything, not Helia." ...why was she saying those things, even? To demonstrate her intellectual superiority? No, certainly not! Even an average amoeba could outsmart Sol, most likely, so attempting to prove something like that would be terribly demeaning, thank you very much. (Maybe, maybe something within her just didn't want Sol to get... well, hurt. If Selene shattered her dreams and hopes now, the knife she planned to sink into her abdomen wouldn't be as painful, would it? Not that that would have any influence over her pain receptors, but still! Tarnishing others' innocence, and twisting their minds to her liking... oh, that could be a lot of fun, alright.)

The philosophical dispute over what constituted friendship had to wait, though, because the abomination that threw accusations at them? Well, that creature certainly wasn't going to, nor would its zombies! "Have you lost your mind?" Selene shouted, before letting her claws cover her hands. "That's fine by me, though. I shall turn your pathetic servants into fertilizer!" Weren't corpses great for that purpose, after all? Flowers derived their strength from death, and the moon princess had always thought it to be pretty metal. Here, accept this sacrifice, my floral allies! Without a hint of regret, Selene turned towards the shambling corpses-- she did a graceful pirouette, and immediately afterwards? Limbs began raining from the sky, along with black, rotten blood. "Run? Myself? Pfft! You are speaking to Selene, the heiress of the moon. Your monsters cannot scare me, you wretched beast-- not when the greatest monstrosity here is me. Now, who wants to dance with me next? Come, come, and let me tear you apart!"

"I cannot... cannot believe you'd say something like that, Selene," the thing protested, sounding almost... well, wounded. Pretty rich considering it had attacked them, wasn't it? As in, it had absolutely no right to claim victimhood here-- no law in existence would support such a thing. Oh, I will give you wounded, alright. Just wait till I get to you! the moon princess thought, only to leap into the air once again. (And, honestly? For the first time in what must have been ages, Selene felt actually, truly alive. No, really. Ah, there was no better feeling than the one you got from watching your enemies fall before you, and from savoring the fear of those who still remained! Yes, be afraid. Be very afraid, and regret the day when you were born into this wretched world.)

"Does our sacrifice mean nothing to you? Absolutely nothing?" the bug continued. "And what about you, Sol? We defied your mother to preserve the capsule, and got burnt for it-- stuck in her flames for eternity, without a moment of peace. Is that what we get for honoring your wish? For remaining loyal to you? I should have known not to trust the likes of you! Children or not, goddesses are scum," their newest enemy spat out. "Admit it, children! You've lied to us from the very beginning, haven't you? Lied to us, and laughed in our faces as we burned! I'm sure that, to you, it must have been a lot of fun. Alright, then, I see what this is-- kill us, and end our suffering. It's not like you are capable of doing anything else, anyway. Speak to us in the language of cruelty, for it's the only one you are fluent in!"

 

[starboob]

You know what really grinds Sol's goats? That Selene cannot accept that her definition of friendship is absolutely correct. Like, Sol knows she is stubborn about a lot of her opinions, mostly because she has to be since everyone seems to have a lifetime membership to the Disregard Sol's Awesome Ideas club, but this is one thing she is certain of. She knows that friends are supposed to be warm feelings personified. They are not there to use her. Those are not friends. Those are Brutus Maximuses. It also makes her sad that Selene is automatically revealing she's never had a friend. Well, Sol hasn't had a friend either, but at least she knows that. This only makes Sol want to be Selene's friend even harder––especially with the Evidence that they used to be Friends! Friends by Sol's definition, too, she's fairly certain. Why else would little Selene have made that picture? You just cannot fake it that hard, Sol is pretty sure.

So all of that is running through Sol's mind just as she runs right smack dab into the magic barrier with a crack. "Ouchie," she moans, as she staggers backwards, covering her nose and cracking it back into proper position before her healing factor heals it incorrectly. (And she does not want to have to re-break her nose. That always sucks butt.) Wiping (smearing) her nose faucet across her face, she turns back to look at the battlefield that used to be a schoolyard. She isn't surprised to see that Selene chose not to strategically retreat as she had suggested. At least she's just making the undead dead again. That's a plus, Sol guesses. Or was a plus, until those limbs that were flying everywhere and the bodies that were falling to the ground start collecting together to form, Sol doesn't know, a super zombie? "Crap. Okay. Cool, cool, cool––this definitely was not covered in Left 4 Dead one or two," she says to herself, trying to search her brain for a lightbulb that might work for the situation that they're both in. Naturally, she tries to root Mega!Zombie into place, but the second her roots wrap around the zombie!Hulk? The zombie easily chews through the roots with the twenty or so mouths cover its body.

"We became death, Sol, do you really think you can stop us with your magic? We became death to preserve your memories!" the bug shrieks, her face changing eleven different times. The angry thing flies into the air and lifts one of it's spindly legs and the super zombie shudders in response, coming to life. The gross amalgamation of people that would put the human centipede to shame (wow, Sol is kind of glad she does not fully get that reference), punches the earth sending shockwaves through the ground. The first round isn't so bad and Sol manages to stay on her feet, but the second? She gets knocked around, right into the middle of a zombie horde she had been trying to avoid. The zombies open their mouths, but they all just sound like the bug speaking, "Ungrateful! Goddesses always demand too much of their followers."

"Crap––I'm sorry, dudes, but I..." Sol pleads, or tries to, but she isn't sure how to make it up to these souls. She doesn't want to believe that Selene and her would have done something like this as children, but who is she to deny these malicious spirits their truth? It's not like Sol even remembers that time of her life! (Why? Why doesn't she remember? Why keep this from her? Well, those questions will have to be dealt with later as the zombies...) The zombies are starting to descend on Sol and she instinctively covers herself in a thick cocoon made of roots. It's when she's in her hiding place, panicking and trying to keep her cool, that the bug says her mom did this? It's not that it's unbelievable it's just that...

(In the back of her mind a grainy memory that is fuzzy around the edges resurfaces. She's younger and she's sitting on a tire swing in a garden somewhere. Helia is beside her, not in her usual Sun form, but Sol still knows it's her. Sol is sniffling and kicking her feet. "Well, if I come with you, you have to promise me something," this younger Sol says, her voice shaking for some reason (her eyes look swollen and red, like she had been crying). "And what is that, my child?" Helia asks, her face impossible to read. "You have to protect everyone while I'm away. I don't want anyone getting hurt while I'm gone, okay?" Helia smiles, but it's cold, "Anything for you, my darling.")

"She... promised," Sol says, in complete disbelief. The roots around her fall apart and one of the zombies grabs her by the throat, but Sol doesn't seem to notice. All she can really focus on is her body temperature rising to the point where her blood isn't boiling, it's searing her from the inside out. Her chest rises and falls as she barely contains the fire that is waking up inside of her––the only thing that keeps her from bursting is remembering that she's not angry with these zombies. She's angry with her mom, Helia. Though still hot, she keeps her temper in line and forcefully, she grabs the zombie's hand and removes it from her neck. She knocks the other zombies away with a vine as she approaches the giant bug lady. "Stop this! It's not our fault we don't remember. I wish we could bring you all back... or I wish that I could," Selene looks like she's having too much fun that she's not sure Selene would help bring these people back, "I don't remember anything from that time, it's all fuzzy to me. I'm sorry, though. I'm sorry that my mom did this to you––she wasn't... She wasn't supposed to and none of you deserved this. If I had known this was going to be the price for preserving the memory of our friendship? I wouldn't have asked. Swear it on all that is holy to me."

"All just excuses, child," the bug sighs and Sol gets the idea that nothing they say will actually make a difference; they're either dealing with an angry bug or a super angry bug. The angry, possibly super angry, bug continues, "Sorry doesn't bring us back. Sorry doesn't make up for how you have spit on our memory. We are ending the tyranny of goddesses today!"

The next thing the bug does? Sol is going to need wash her eyeballs after witness it chew the head off of Mega!Zombie and then burrow somewhere in its giant "body." (Calling it a body is somewhat of a reach, but Sol just doesn't know how to describe it. Mostly, it makes her want to throw up.) Now, Mega!Zombie + Angry Bug charge at Sol and, well, she runs. ...Taking it straight over to Selene. "S-Selene!" (Look, Selene is clearly the most equipt at murder and Sol is Not Having a Good Time.)

 

[Syntra]

Sometimes, life could be the greatest teacher. Selene, of course, knew that, and so she listened to the cues-- to those tiny hints that might fly over the heads of those ignorant enough not to care, that was. And, her takeaway from this latest adventure? Why, that she shouldn’t gripe about every single trip solely out of principle! (The truth was, the moon princess hadn’t had so much fun in ages. Just, who would have guessed that she’d get to have her personal Resident Evil simulator? The series was kind of trash, with Twilight-tier plot twists, but it did wanton murder much better, so Selene could recommend it to just about-- wait, what? …eh, probably just one of those brain farts, as Sol would have called them. Either way, this sure was better than Christmas! Instead of celebrating materialism and child labor, she’d get to worship her ancestors in the very way the original moon had intended-- via spilling hot, red, steaming blood.) “Out of my way, morons,” Selene snarled, launching herself forward. “You are not even worthy of being struck down by my blade!” Because, no, living corpses certainly didn’t deserve the privilege of being killed by a princess. (Didn’t that technically count as eating crumbs off someone else’s plate? That mysterious killer had branded them as their sacrifices, and hey, say what you want about Selene, but she did know a lot about combat etiquette! The first rule: ‘you don’t steal others’ kills.’ The second rule: ‘you really, really don’t.’ Besides, in addition to honoring whoever had brought swift death to the zombies the first time around? Their aura was a weak, fading thing, and that suggested that they were being controlled by some other force. The bug monster, perhaps? I’ll feed its own entrails to it, and see if it solves our little undead infestation problem!)

Blah blah blah, more talking, blah blah blah, more guilt trips. Selene wasn’t trying to listen, mind you-- future victims often had many things to say, most of them not even remotely close to relevant, and so she fully intended to tune them out. Still, it was kind of hard to do that, you know? At least when the creature was screaming at the top of its lungs, and every word felt like a dagger in her brain! “Shut up,” Selene recommended, and cut down another corpse standing in her path. “Maybe learn not to blame others for your stupid choices? It wasn’t my fault that you decided to die for something as nonsensical as that! You only have your own weakness to blame, so if you want to cast accusations, look in that direction.”

“How can you even say that?!” the beast wailed. ‘You specifically were begging us to do just that, Selene! You were so upset that you were going to lose your…’ Ah, there they went again, with the bad fanfiction centered around her non-existent ~earthly life ~. Seriously, couldn’t they work on their, uh, reality comprehension? The fact that they all thought Selene had at one point not only been a child, but a child who also lived on Earth, did not make it so. If they wanted to brainwash her into believing that, they should at least invest more effort into it! This would have been like… like her trying to convince Helia that she was actually her daughter, not Sol, and that, if she was thinking of a good birthday gift, the sun goddess killing herself would suffice. Anyway, the auras of the zombies began to… merge? Had her eyes not been sewn shut, Selene would have squinted, because yes, these things didn’t tend to happen too often. “Finally, a worthy opponent!” the moon princess shouted. “Sol, stop running. Aren’t you oh so fond of claiming that you are my friend, hmm? Then do something for it for once, and immobilize it. Besides, running away is just disgraceful! Are you a goddess, or a rat?” Some rat DNA admixture would have explained a lot about the sun heiress, come to think of it, but Selene was kind of in the middle of… well, in the middle of her version of pep talk, essentially. (Was she an expert on that? No, not even slightly. Still, the moon princess was fond of using her brain, and that was more than most people on this planet could say about themselves!) “You can do it. I trust you,” she added, mostly because empty buzzwords like that seemed to work on Sol.

“Oh, can you? Can you, indeed?” the bug-eyed thing smirked. “I wouldn’t be so sure of that, Selene.” The ground beneath their feet was swallowed by eerie light, then, and all of a sudden? All of a sudden, the courtyard was overflowing with life, and thick, green vines wrapped around their ankles. …uh oh. Had they just been chained by vegetation?! “See? Even her little friends think that we are in the right,” the monster cooed. “You goddesses have been abusing your powers for far, far too long, and every single living thing is sick of you. Isn’t that right?”

“Yes,” a begonia whispered. “Do you have any idea how annoying it is, Sol, to be at your beck and call constantly? Like, at least give a girl a vacation, dude.”

“Have you ever considered that maybe I don’t want to bloom when you want me to bloom?” some other flower, too insignificant for Selene to recognize, whined. “Perhaps they are right-- perhaps only death shall cure you from this arrogance. Well, what do you have to say for yourself? Don’t just stand there like a rock, present your case! …if you can manage that, that is.” Yes, if they could manage that, because it didn’t look like the Zombiestein was about to wait peacefully while they sorted it out!

 

[starboob]

Alright. Cool. Zombie-saurus Rex is chasing her and all Sol can think for some Sun forsaken reason? 'Run, run, run as fast as you can! You can't catch me, I'm the gingerbreadwoman!' She doesn't even know who the gingerbreadwoman is!! Like, she gets that in these life or death situations, that are teetering closer to the death side of the spectrum, that you don't really get to choose what thoughts decide to roll through the ol' noggin. Sol has been in enough of these situations to know. Well, okay, that's not entirely true. She has only been in a handful and that is still enough for her to determine that her brain runs on nonsensical autopilot when she's probably about to get her butt-kicked. Hopefully this won't require motherly intervention, because that would be really embarrassing and, also, she can hear the terms of her punishment being a Summer wedding when everyone knows she wants a Spring one. So, she huffs and she puffs and tries to make it over to her favorite murderer so that maybe she can tap-in Selene as she feels rather ill-equipped for the job. Even if Sol doesn't think it's bad to make the undead dead again, up until the moonicorn incident, she really has not been involved in murder. Maybe, like, once when she accidentally stepped on a snail shell but outside of accidental bug squashing? Her body count is nonexistent.

Selene just does it so naturally, too. Watching her arms move in such a coordinated way where she's slashing through zombies before they even realize she's marked them as her target? Well, Sol can't say it's not not not attractive. Weird, because watching the fire signs go to work has never filled her with this particular flavor of interest. Eh, she'll have to sort this out later because Selene is yelling at her (mood killer) and saying something close to encouraging (mood enhancer). 'Ah, crap... She's right!' Like, yeah, Sol is a goddess! There is nothing wrong, of course, with being related to rats or being a rat but in this situation? In this situation she does need to remember who she is even if her lineage makes her want to barf half the time. Plus, Selene adding in that extra little, "You can do it. I trust you," is like a direct injection of a performance enhancing drug into her bloodstream. "Dude, you are totally right! I'm not just some ordinary Sol, I am the Sol. Alright," she says, turning around to face Colossus: Zombie Edition, a confident smile on her lips. (Dude, how could she have even forgotten that she's a goddess? Like, yeah, it had been alarming to see the super zombie chomp through her roots like it was nothing earlier, but why had she let that stop her? Everyone knows that when something doesn't work the first time, you try even harder for the second and third time! Duh! That's physics!) "Time to make the world's most disgusting sashimi out of you, pal. You chose the wrong goddesses-in-training to mess with." And with that, Sol raises her arms and concentrates her energy on the roots deep beneath the soil, the seeds yet to crack, and pulls them upwards towards the Sun (to be).

Except...

Except it doesn't work. Well, it does? But she doesn't think that the sudden spring of vegetation has anything to do with her since, instead of immobilizing Goliathia the Zombie, the plants immobilize the two heiresses? "What the heck..." she scratches her head, trying to think whether or not she did anything wrong, but plant magic is the one thing that she's always had a natural knack for so it's never backfired like this on her. Though quicker than Sol would have liked, she finds out why her magic didn't work and, hm, is it just Sol or is the sound of a glass skyscraper shattering filling everyone's ears? "I––what?" she stutters, absolutely confused and uncomprehending of what the begonias and snapdragons are saying. Throughout her entire life plants have responded to her without protest––she's brought them to life both with magic and without, using good ol' fashion TLC. Plants always careen towards her when she passes by. She has shared her secrets with them, her wildest dreams, and they've whispered theirs to her as well. Part of the essence of the Sun is to support life and it's the one facet of her identity that she enjoys and celebrates so it's hard to swallow that these flowers are upset with her. (Part of her, of course, has to question whether these flowers are under the influence of the curse that Selene had been talking about earlier. You know, the one that seems to have spurred so much ire in these zombies and the bug. While it does stand to reason that maybe she has been too reliant on plants, she doesn't exactly buy that what they're saying is coming from their deep heart. No, she definitely believes this has something to do with the curse. That doesn't mean she'll disregard the concerns entirely, however. She's also not going to overpower their will. That would be a major Helia move.)

"You have every right to be angry with us, all of you, whether you're a zombie or flower," Sol starts, her voice surprisingly steady despite how uncertain she feels. "We may be goddesses but we're fallible, too, and clearly I've made some mistakes. I didn't mean to stress you little things out with my calls, I was thoughtless about it and I cannot ask for your forgiveness enough. Here's the thing, though, if you let those zombies end us? Well, the Sun and moon are still going to continue on for another few hundred years, but when our moms expire do you know what's going to happen to the Earth?"

"It will become better?" one of the lilies quips.

"No, all life will cease to exist. Without sunshine, the plants won't grow and everything will freeze. Without the moon, the tides will stop and earth's rotation will get all wobbly and that's gonna mess with so many bird nav systems. Look, I know our people have committed serious crimes, but killing us prevents all this from getting better. I can't vouch for my rival, but I'm not trying to be like my mom. I mean, I'm listening to you, aren't I? And––"

"No, no, no! No more excuses from goddesses! No more lies either. You say you listen, but just wait––in a few hours you'll be growing apples to munch on seconds after they've been born! Do you know how traumatizing that is?" the begonia starts again and the vines climb up to their waists, "We'll take our chances when a new pantheon eventually emerges. Such is the cycle." By that point Zombie Kardashian has trampled through the greenery and come right up in front of the two young goddesses. It looks down on them, the million different pairs of eyes all burning into Sol's brain. The monster raises, like, six different giant and malformed arms into the air and Sol braces for impact. She doesn't do anything to defend herself, mostly because it's pointless and so she only hopes that Zombie-zilla acts faster than her healing factor. Still, from some long forgotten instinct, she reaches for Selene and says, "I'm sorry I couldn't protect us."

 

[Syntra]

Selene didn’t think that she wanted that much from her life. She wanted the throne, yes, but only because it belonged to her; her mother’s painful death, also, but only because that much she was owed; everyone’s bottomless respect, to top it off, because it was only natural to look at the sky and marvel at the beauty of the moon. All in all, you could say she was practically the celestial Cinderella! The requirements listed there were the absolute bare minimum, thank you very much. Did you see her, for example, asking for poems to be composed about her glorious deeds, or for humans to pray to her ten times a day? No, of course not! Because, unlike certain heavenly entities, Selene understood that getting your heart’s every desire wasn’t good for one’s soul-- that a worthy ruler suffered, along with her people, in order to unlock true wisdom. And, when viewed from this angle? Why, her excursion to Sol-land could actually be considered the greatest trial of them all, and one that would sharpen her into the diamond that she was! Even so, however, there were certain… hmm, certain limits. Certain boundaries. Crossing those, you see, would mean leaving the ‘worthy trial’ zone, and descending into ‘the affronts against divine dignity’ category-- things you wouldn’t wish on you worst enemy, really. Now, did Selene wish to experience any of this for herself? No, because while trouble strengthened character, it only did so when distributed thoughtfully. In careless hands, what acted as medicine could be poison, and the scalpel that could cut out an inflamed appendix could easily end up pressed against your throat. No, only fools ever played with fire! Fools who enjoyed gambling with their own future, along with the futures of those under her command. Was it any wonder, then, that Selene refused to let herself be exposed to such a danger?

…yes, refused, except that the world didn’t exactly care about her consent. That wasn’t a new thing, either-- since she had ended up in Helia’s clutches, her existence had been one humiliation after another, each more bizarre than the one before it. …still, Selene had sort of hoped that this trend would be reversed at one point, you know? That, one day, she would grow desensitized to it, and switch her mind to the metaphoric screen saver whenever her captors decided to test her patience in new, even more insufferable manner. That wasn’t a pipe dream, right? As in, it was hard to spend your days stewing in perpetual anger-- at some point, everything stewable would be… uh, stewed… and more heat would only make it fall apart. A reasonable assumption, wasn’t it? Except that, no, not even Zen Buddhism courses could have prepared Selene for being lectured by flowers of all things. Flowers! (Why did Sol even try to explain her what her perspective was, anyway? How utterly baffling. The sun heiress had always struck her as odd, mildly speaking, but to think that she’d sink that low… ah, this was worse than a wolf asking if it could please, pretty please devour a sheep for dinner! Did the stupid plant not understand the importance of hierarchies, huh? Always, always there had to be someone above the others-- without that, there would be no way to tell who was the best, and how would their society survive like that? Everything would devolve into anarchy!)

“How dare you speak to us in such a vile manner, you bunch of useless weeds?” Selene’s nostrils flared in anger. “Begone, or you shall be disposed of like the trash that you are! Do you think that you’re important, with your fancy photosynthesis and everything? Well, you are not! All of you are replaceable, every single one of you, and should you rise against us, we will wipe you from existence faster than you could say ‘moonlight sonata.’ And, Sol, stop offering them excuses, will you? Can’t you see that they will only spit on your kindness?” And that, ladies and ladies, was why you didn’t waste such sentiments on those who didn’t deserve them! Gentleness this, justice that-- just empty buzzwords, as far as Selene was concerned. Cruelty spoke in a much louder voice, and the result of that? Why, everyone listened, whether they liked it or not. Let’s just say that there was a reason why the whip was more convincing than sweet words were! “Don’t apologize, Sol,” Selene gritted her teeth, “and instead look how things are done. Truly look, I mean, because I’ll need you to learn.” Everything happened in a split second. Selene’s claws flashed and the flowers fell on the ground, their stems cut in an instant-- their lives, too, as their friends cried out in outrage.

“See? This is what happens, always, no matter what you promise to us! You are a liar, Sol. Liar, liar, liar, liar! How are we to trust you ever again, when you treat us like this? When you wield such huge power, and yet don’t need to answer to anyone?”

Selene, however, cared not for the flowers’ plight. Without a hint of hesitation, she ran towards the zombie-- the thing took a swipe against her, but the moon princess? Oh, the moon princess jumped, landing directly on the arm! Of course, she didn’t waste any time there. Swiftly, she buried her claws in the creature’s chest, and took out its wet, rotten, beating heart…! “Look at it, Sol,” she commanded. “Can you see? Now, I want you to destroy it. Do what you have to, as the one who will one day sit on your mother’s throne!”

 

[starboob]

It occurs to Sol, in this very moment, that she has never been a hero. Not in the way she has imagined she will have to be as the heiress to half the luminary throne or as a queen. Sure, she brakes for birds, puts the worms back after it rains, and rarely ever kills the spiders, but that aside? What has she really done to save the world? Killing the Sun court with kindness is not working out––not that she ever expected it to––and even if it does say something about her character that she has remained good and kind in the face of such mean entities, that's not enough. It just isn't and there is no other way for Sol to spin it. She wouldn't go so far as to call herself a coward, for she knows she has too much courage for that, but she certainly hasn't made the moves necessary to be a hero. The hero she believes that she is meant to be, moreover. Heroes are more than just your friendly neighborhood Spider-Woman, because even your friendly neighborhood Spider-Woman fights crime. (Is there even such a thing as a pacifist hero? Maybe, if thinks about peaceful protests, but how often do those really work? There are only so many documented cases of such and Sol would be remiss to not deem those outliers. So what does this mean? And why, oh frigging why, does she have to realize this now.) It's almost too late for her to apply this lesson, because she's about to pummeled and ended (unless her mom comes to save her which seems unlikely given the thick cloud cover above). 'Should... Should I try to force the vines to release us?'

Argh! Why does this heroing stuff have to be so hard? Why can't it just be black/white? Had she known there was going to be so much grey area when she decided that her queendom needs to be saved from its cannibalistic self, she might have thought harder about it. But she's already committed. She can still make the primordial mothers proud! Okay, she just needs 13-15 seconds to make this decision. Can she stall for that long?

Well, turns out she might not have to, because Selene is saying something to her and Sol is sort of paying attention. (She's just applying her Selene Filter that makes all of her rudeness sound less rude.) Unfortunately, her Selene Filter is not powerful enough to omit her senseless acts of violence against the flowers! "Selene––that's so not cool! They're just mad at us, that doesn't mean that we have to bully them harder than they're all bullying us!" Okay, when Sol says that out loud? She hears how ridiculous that sounds and it shows on her face. "Wait... But I shouldn't just let myself get bullied... Hmm," she scratches her chin as she deliberates on the ethics of, Thouest whomst threwst the first punch shouldst gets theirst bütt kickéd. Like, it's not like Sol had even been aware of her offense so she could not have corrected it and now they're threatening her life? Seems harsh. She looks down at the vines wrapped around half her body and puts her hands over her hips (careful to not smush any of the buds), "Your argument isn't that good. Like, no, I don't think Selene should have chopped down your cousins, but as a great poet once wrote, Does a scorpion sting when fighting back?" (2020, Swift), "We're allowed to fight back when you're threatening to be an accomplice in our murder! Survival is a basic function of any life form and if there is still that function in you, you will release me. Otherwise, I am going to have to do something not very nice because I won't just sit around and let myself be killed by revenants." The flowers seem to deliberate and Sol continues, "I tried playing fair and nice. You chose not to believe me and I cannot control how you see me, but I will spend the rest of my days being much more careful with my powers. I'll even learn some light magic so I'm not always burdening you pretty little things."

"We will resent you forever for this, Sol! We will come back!" the snapdragons howl as they release the ray of sunshine from their hold. It is such a relief that they do, because Sol was totally bluffing. She was pretty much going to let herself get smashed. (Is there a way for her to practice being mean so that when she actually has to be mean she won't falter? Maybe she should ask Selene about this since she is Princess Meanie-pants.) And speaking of the resident meanie-pants? She's, um, holding up a disgusting giant heart in front of Sol and asking her to destroy it? "I don't really want to look at it. It's going to give me nightmares and it smells," she says, pinching her nose. "I also don't get why I have to destroy it? It's, um, your kill so that wouldn't be fair. Like homicidal plagiarism." Yeah, that should work. That should definitely be her get out of murder free card. "Thanks so much for saving us, btw. I wimped out, but I just don't do this fighting stuff, you know?" It reminds her too much of Helia and how she leans into the destructive side of the Sun. She's seen her become a monster on the battlefield and lose herself to fire. Sol doesn't want that to happen to her so she figures if she avoids fighting/destruction entirely she can avoid getting lost in the sauce. So despite her earlier internal philosophical reckoning about what being a hero actually entails? She just isn't ready to choose violence, even if Selene did most of the violence and the thing they're ending tried to end them first. Even if it's already dead, too. She just can't.

"Besides, don't you think we should exercise," exorcise, "this thing first? I mean, I'm kind of curious why it's so mad at us." Not to mention she wants to know how much of what it had said is true. She wants to know if her and Selene really used to be friends. Even if she's always had this feeling that were, she wants some more concrete proof. She also wants to know for sure if that weird possible memory she had had been real and if so, what that means. "I know some psychics in town. Their shop is called Your Moms Psychic and they always serve tea and bikkies!"

 

[Syntra]

Homicidal plagiarism? Selene hadn’t exactly viewed it in that way-- more than that, she had seen it as a mother bird feeding worms to her fledgling, solely because the baby wasn’t able to provide for itself just yet. You couldn’t go from championing tree rights to committing war crimes like a pro, you see? Come to think of it, though… hmm, maybe that would have been the very opposite of educational, actually. Shamefully thoughtless. Wouldn’t it have been like trying to listen to a symphony, and skipping right to the climax? What about the rising action, huh? Once again, the proverbial stopped clock turned out to be right, which… uh, pointed towards a really disturbing tendency. Just, what was going on here? A dumbass’ dumbass opinions could only ring true so many times before it got suspicious, so the alarm was flashing a bright red in Selene’s head right now! (What could have caused this? Had a demon seized control over them, only to start broadcasting a twisted version of reality in their minds? The moon princess saw no other explanation, aside from maybe some ancient curse.) “Your assessment… may be correct, actually. There is merit in letting one earn her first killing blow, I have to admit-- merit, and honor as well. Fine, fine. Let us do it your way!” Not that Selene was truly interested in the nonsense these monstrosities had been peddling, but… well, it was curious, wasn’t it? A mystery waiting to be unraveled, like a ball of yarn. (The unknown, you see, had always been something that Selene saw as a personal slight. As in, how dared it exist outside of her sphere of knowledge?! The moon was all-seeing, so it only stood to reason it also had to be all-knowing, and that which interfered with the vision deserved to be torn to shreds!) “Bind these pathetic creatures, then,” she gestured towards the super-zombie and the not-so-super bug. “I don’t want to return and find out that they’ve managed to turn the local cemetery into a cheap Walking Dead imitation.” Yeah, mostly because there were way better zombie series out there, and… uh, where was she going with this, again?

Once Sol did as asked, Selene wasted no time in leaving the cursed grounds behind. This isn’t going to work, anyway, the moon princess thought, with her typical optimism. The fortune teller will only feed us nonsense, and then ask for an arm and a leg in return. Parasites, all of them! Humans and magical powers went together about as well as ice-cream and shit you’d stepped in while running late to work, so no, none of those hacks could have been the real deal. Why had she agreed to Sol’s suggestion, even? Had madness claimed her mind, and obscured it in the same way dark clouds obscured the otherwise bright skies? (Ah, if only it hadn’t been for that momentary lapse in judgment! By now, they could have been back at the sun court, and… no, scratch that, actually. Because, returning back under Helia’s thumb? Indeed, even making a fool out of yourself in front of an obvious fraud beat that!)

Anyway, did fortune tellers have some sort of official regulations for their sham of a profession? Because while they didn’t have to conform to every single cliché in the book, pretty much all of them did! The oppressive aroma of lilac that threatened to obliterate her nose was the same as what she’d smelled at that blind woman’s place, back when she and Sol had been kids, which… When we were kids? What? Oh, moon save them, the stupidity spread like wildfire! (All of this, Selene was convinced, had to be a side effect of Helia pouring goddess-knew-what into her veins. Or the primary effect, maybe? It was entirely possible that the sun queen had come to the conclusion that, should her daughter resist all attempts to cure her, everyone else should be brainwashed into contracting the same brand of stupidity! That way, her foolishness would not only go unnoticed, but instead would be expected, and perhaps even thought of as the hallmark of intelligence. If you couldn’t beat ‘em, you had to join ‘em, right? Or make everyone else join, in that particular case.)

“Welcome, welcome, princesses,” someone said, in this melodious voice that felt like a caress to Selene’s ears. “I have been expecting you. Come, come, sit down and have some tea. Do you like cherries? Ah, what a silly question! Of course that you do.”

“And you are?” the moon princess asked, clearly unimpressed.

“My name,” the woman smiled, “isn’t something that I can tell you. It doesn’t belong to me, you see-- only the skies can know, along with the seas.” Ah, great, more occult nonsense! (Not that she hadn’t signed up for this by coming here in the first place, mind you, but, ugh. Was she not at all embarrassed upon letting such nonsense fall from her lips?) “Either way,” the fortune teller continued, “I assume that you are here about the cursed school? The smell of death clings to you, oh, it does, it does! The smell of death and guilt, as pronounced as smoke. Before you ask-- yes, it is your fault. You never should have crossed the boundary between our worlds, but you did, and now others pay the price! Do you enjoy knowing that, hmm? That you are the cause of such great suffering? I can’t believe that it isn’t the case, considering the sins of your bloodline. If you are here for empty gestures, turn back now,” she recommended. “Because, if you wish to correct this? You will have to give yourself to the dead, soul and body.”

 

[starboob]

Ah, sweet, sweet success! Another day Sol has not committed crimes against humanity is a good day indeed. (Well, save for the possible crimes her younger self and Selene's younger self may have committed against their entire suburb... but that is a mystery soon to be solved and if true, well, Sol will leave that for a later Sol to deal with. For now, she will live in the present moment where her worst crime is probably cutting off all the sleeves on her mom's tops.) Honestly, the sunbeam is shocked her excuse even worked. She was sort of prepared for the outcome where Selene throttles her for her defiance and just, you know, kills her since she seems to want her dead so bad. ...Or does she? It's kind of hard to tell between the murder attempts and pseudo-pep talks. "Yep, yep, honor, merit, the learning experience, etcetera––that's totally what I mean," she agrees, not even trying to hide the fact that she is lying. She doesn't mean that. If Selene really thinks she can get Sol to kill something? She's sorely mistaken. (Surely, there has got to be a way for her to be a hero without having to give into a shiny happy fit of rage. Again, probably a later Sol problem as this Sol only has to bind the puzzle piece mess of zombie parts and The Bug.) While she's pretty sure the plants here are still mad at her, she really doesn't think Selene is wrong to tell her to make sure the corpses are secure. Nope, can't have them terrorizing the combination KFC/Taco Bell. This time, when she summons the vines, she asks for their permission to use their strength, makes a deal with them that she'll read to them more often and let their fruits mature naturally unless there is dire need for snackies.

Clutching the still beating, still rotting, still very stinky beast heart close to her chest, Sol skips down the sidewalk following Selene. She hums another jingle that's been stuck in her head (the Barbie girl theme, if you must know) and watches the clouds pass by overhead. When they finally arrive at the psychic shop, it's just as Sol remembers it (?)—lit only with candles, thick with lilac (better than palo santo in her onion), and lined with tapestries. The shelves are cluttered with books, statues, and other knickknacks; it takes everything in Sol to not stare into the ruby eyes of the stone monkey that is just begging for her Sol and eternal devotion. It's a good thing she already has a mission to take care of otherwise she would totally be under the influence of that monkey statue.

When the woman comes out from the back? Sol smiles brightly, not at all alarmed that the woman seems to already know so much about them––she's a psychic, that's her job––and takes a seat.

"Dude, you really must know everything!" she exclaims, grabbing a handful of pitted cherries and popping them into her mouth. She also helps herself to the ginger spiced black tea and adds heaps of honey before gulping it down. "Doesn't quite beat a crunch wrap supreme and baja blast, but thanks! I'm already feeling refreshed and ready for some psychosis!" (No.)

Where Selene is annoyed with the psychic’s refusal to give her name, Sol sees it as part of the charm and authenticity of her services. Already, she is 110 percent sold that this woman is Legit with a capital L. And, hmm... she kind of wishes she weren't so legit, because now Sol thinks she knows way too much about what happened and really hopes that the psychic is just pulling their leg. "Wha––? But I don't even harm mosquitos and you're telling me I was a part of this?"

"Sol, you came up the idea," the woman smiles, oh so sweetly. (Oh, so mockingly.) "You thought you could outplay the game by forcing Helia to protect everyone, but you were a mere child playing with fire. You were only ever going to watch the world burn. And, Selene," she chuckles, "Ah, I would pay my weight in gold to see your reaction to how you acted back then. In any case, are you willing to right your wrongs? Or will you continue the rot of your lineages? I would not judge if you chose the latter. It's almost written in the stars what you will choose."

Ah. Okay. Sol wishes she could think that this isn't real, but in her hearts she knows the woman is speaking truth and she wishes her gut instincts were more like Selene's and forced her to believe some twisted version of reality. She sets the mutant zombie heart on the psychic's table and crosses her arms over it, resting her chin on top. (To top it all off the psychic is basically daring Sol to make things right––as if she wouldn't try on her own, but the added subtle dare? The ray of sunshine pretty much has to rise to the occasion. Besides, she is sick and tired of everyone thinking she's like Helia when she's not! She's not, she's not, she's Not!!! It hurts enough hearing Selene accuse her of such but this stranger just pours salt all over her wounds.) She sighs, lifts her head, and then slaps the heart, "Alright, let's do this. The dead can have me, body and Sol. Get rekt, you know?" The psychic only smiles in response and, is it just Sol, or are all of her teeth suddenly really pointy and did her eyes just go completely vantablack? Before Sol can even investigate further, the woman snaps her fingers, and the mutant heart sitting on the table jumps into the air and swallows the heiresses whole.

The land that apparently hides inside of the heart? It's filled with black smoke. There is no light. There is no life. There is no air, yet screams fill both the heiresses' ears as shadows pass through their chests. Each shadow freezes Sol to the marrow of her bones whereas the ones that go through Selene send hot lightning through her veins.

Sol crumples to her knees and hugs her body, whimpering, as the shadows filter through her. Eventually, it stops but only after what feels like eons. When Sol opens her eyes again, the world is still off. She doesn't know quite how to describe it, but the scenery around them isn't quite clear—everything is shrouded in mist. She also notices, when she looks over at Selene, that her counterpart has been transformed into her child self which means... Yup! Sol is also kid!Sol. "Haha, you're even tinier now––" she'd continue the teasing, but, from the corner of her eye, she spots that haunted house they used to hang out in. “What were we thinking? That looks like tetanus factory.”

 

[Syntra]

Blah blah blah, more guilt trips. Did everyone around here think that lies would sway her heart? That they could invent whatever sob story came to their mind, and Selene would unravel? 'Boo hoo, look at those poor, poor humans! They had names and dreams and everything, and they all died because of you, you big, big meanie. Aren't you ashamed of yourself?' And, to tell you the truth, the response was 'no.' (All of those people seemed to think that she should care, but why? Why, why, why? So some humans had died, big goddamn deal. They did a fine job of killing each other 24/7, so how was the moon princess supposed to believe that this was some great tragedy, again? More than that, the species could very well be classified as invasive, for they had overrun pretty much the entire planet! No, even if they had somehow caused this, they would have deserved a pat on the shoulder for even attempting to curb their population.) "Give myself to the dead?" Selene asked, her voice full of disbelief. "Can you explain why these dead were so important in the first place? I'm sorry, but I fail to see why I should sacrifice myself to save a bunch of mortal flies. Besides, they lived, what, ten good years already? Given their lifespan, this seems like that they didn't even die that prematurely." ...what? The last time Selene had checked, the average humans lifespan was about eighty years, and that was a blink of an eye in comparison with literally everything else. "I'm certain a lot of them didn't even notice that they died a little sooner than usual."

"Selene," the fortune teller sighed, "I would love to say that I'm shocked, but frankly, I am not. You really did lose your heart, didn't you? Not that I didn't warn you about this, but of course that there's no way a goddess like yourself would listen to me. Eh, no matter, no matter! You will understand the sanctity of life one day, but by then, it may already be too late." Ah, yes, vague threats! How, hmm, original, right? Except that not, because those had been her faithful companions for most of her life, courtesy of Luna.

"I don't know, I just don't think I am interested," the moon princess frowned. "Why should I have to right something that I didn't even commit? This feels like one of those hidden camera shows with a bad punchli--" The punchline, of course, was her entire life, because even beginning to think that she had a semblance of choice here was a symptom of terminal foolishness. Sol, the Queen of Dumbasses, simply wouldn't stand for the idea! Without even trying to consult it with her, the sun heiress simply agreed, and... and of course that she'd get transported with her! Awesome, really. (Who had tied their fates together, anyway? Selene didn't need her +1-- already, she had more personality than most people could deal with.) "What kind of nonsense are you peddling now, Sol?" the moon princess pursed her lips. "Do you truly believe I will buy such an obvious lie? I may be blind, but I am not stupid." If they had reverted to some kid form, then why were her eyes still sewn shut, huh? Oh no, no, no, Sol must have been a) kidding, b) suffering from some kind of hallucination, c) a combination of both. "I suppose that we don't have a choice here, though," she sighed. "Because someone let us fall into a trap here, we must examine our options." And, whether they liked it or not, that involved visiting The House of Tetanus! Just another wonderful, wonderful thing in a long line of wondrous events.

"Selene! Selene, Sol, where have you been?" someone, most likely a child, asked. Obviously, the moon princess couldn't see her, but for some reason, she could... uh, imagine her huffing and puffing? "You promised," she accused them. "Both of you said you wouldn't be late! But I supposed that you were too busy sitting in the tree, k-i-s-i-n--" For reasons far, far beyond her comprehending, Selene blushed furiously.

"Shut up, mortal. How dare you speak to us in that way? Moreover, I seriously doubt that I'm bound to you by an oath-- I do not give those out willy nilly."

"...you're so weird, Selene," the creature giggled. "Has anyone ever told you? But of course that you promised! Can't you tell?" And, indeed, if she focused on it, there was a sense of her strings being pulled, of being forced to go forward-- deep into the entrails of the house, that was. Could she really have promised? Because a goddess's promise was most holy, just like herself! "Come on, stop joking around. It's not like you to miss the great summoning! Not when we worked for so long to ensure that it would go smoothly, anyway. Do you think that it will work out this time?"

"Well, I don't," another voice chimed in, as they were pushed inside. (Ugh, why did there have to be so much dust there? The insides of her nose were tingling, and no, the moon princess did not approve. Couldn't they have cleaned this pigsty a bit, considering that they had invited the grand celestial goddesses?! Even children with their underdeveloped brains should have known better, really.) "It's just so stupid, Sol. Why won't you admit that you're a huge liar? Your mother isn't the sun, and we won't be able to make her come here."

"Hey, hey, hey!" the previous girl frowned. "Sol wouldn't lie to us like that, you... you meanie poopyhead. The previous rituals didn't work because we didn't have the right wood to burn! I did get us some ash branches today, though, so it will be okay." ...ash? As in, the tree associated with the sun's might? Selene hated to admit it, but with the right incantation, this could maybe work--

"Come on, come on, let's make a circle!" someone clapped. "Monica, hand me the lighter..."

 

[starboob]

Admittedly, Sol did not think that when she agreed to help soothe these angry spirits that it would also force Selene to come along with her, because she had not been thinking at all. Now that she is? It does make sense that her counterpart would get dragged into the heart of the beast with her. They are kind of a package deal and, maybe, always have been. She'll have to figure out how to make this up to Selene later, but she kind of thinks that none of her gestures will be seen as genuine. Eh, this only means she'll have to think really hard about how to make this up to her. (Maybe she'll let Selene choose their next adventure? Which really means that she'll have to resign herself to letting Selene lecture her on the proper amount of wine one should drink at a social gathering, because getting 'absolutely hammered' is apparently frowned upon. Ugh. It will probably be the most boring day of her young life, but fine. She will suffer unless she can come up with a better way to make it up to Selene.) Anyway, they are here now, saving the souls of the people that Selene does not care about (probably because she lacks as much heart as she does brain cells).

"Psyops yourself all you please, but you are the teeny tiniest version of yourself possible," she affirms, nodding her head in a very sagely manner. It is weird, she will admit, that even Selene's kid self has her eyes sewn shut. Then again, she figures that this isn't an actual simulation of one of their childhood memories. Just some sort-of equivalent/adjacent version of events. Either that or this is entirely not related to their childhood crimes and the ghosts here are just trying to mess with them to kick their butts when they least expect it. It's too early to tell, so Sol just remains on the lookout. "I would never purposefully try to make you look stupid, btw," 'because you do that well enough on your own.' She would have added, but decides to keep the peace for now. Especially since she's pretty sure the pointed someone that Selene is talking about is her. 'That's fair. That's fair. You earned that one, Sol. Alright, does she seem like she'll accept an apology cake?'

Unfortunately, Sol's wonderings on how to make this all up to Selene will have to wait as she is trying to remember the name of the kind of familiar girl who is running out of the Tetanus Mansion towards them. She has a friend vibe about her, so Sol assumes they're still safe from the angry spirits and grins, waving at her enthusiastically, "Hey! Yeah, sorry, you know a 'Selene and Sol on time' usually means being late anyway. We were looking at a cool bug." (Which is a lie because they had just been at the psychic's place, but it also doesn't feel like a lie? Interesting.) Now, Sol obviously has a million and one more things to say and at least a hundred questions to fire off, but her brain stops working when the unknown friend accuses them of sitting in a tree and k-i-s-s-i-n-g-ing. It's not lost on her that Selene's cheeks are a furious shade of pink. She would have said something about it, but her cheeks are matching in hue. She only snaps out of her stupor to defend Selene, "Lay off, dude. She's a perfectly fine weirdo. It's what makes her so special."

As they walk into the house, Sol throws an arm around Selene's shoulder, without really thinking about it, while her head turns up and down, left and right, looking at the creepy house. Alright, why did they have to choose this place for the summoning? It's so gross and creepy. Maybe it's aesthetique but is it worth it? Probs not. "Yeah, it's totally going to work this time," Sol says easily, without even really knowing what they're talking about. "And," she whips around to face... Phoebe? She's pretty sure that girl with the curly hair is named Phoebe. "My real mom is the Sun. Even my moms think so! They've been cycle analizing my dreams and said that's why she's been visiting me in them!" (What? What???) As the kids all circle up, Sol looks at each of them, trying to remember more about them. But she can't. She knows they must have been her and Selene's old friends based on context, but other than that? She has no idea who they are. "Anyway, yeah, she was mad that we tried using maple wood last month."

"Yeah, you've told us. Now c'mon," Monica urges, grabbing Sol's hand while Phoebe grabs Selene's, "we're going to miss the peak of the full moon! That's also why this didn't work three months ago" (Okay, why did they try so hard at this?) One of the other children, Rachel, takes the lighter from Monica, and then pulls out a knife that she hands to Sol. "If you're still scared, you can have your girlfriend do it," she teases, which, yeah Sol's cheeks go up in flames again.

"She is not my gf!" she squeals, her voice cracking in a totally not suspicious way. She swipes the knife from Rachel, "I can do it." Somehow knowing what to do, even though she has no memory of this, she runs the blade across her palm and lets the blood spill over the bundle of ashwood. When the blood touches the sticks, it sizzles and then absorbs into the wood, turning them all red. Once absorbed, Rachel lights the pile on fire. (This seems like an extreme fire hazard.) Sol grabs Selene's hand with her bleeding one, connecting the circle once more as they all start to chant in Latin or something. (Geez, where did they learn this?)

Immediately, before the incantation is even finished, the small fire they had started shoots into the air, nearly sending the kids backwards with the sudden force. From the flames, it's not Helia who appears. Well, not her in her entirety. Just her face poking through the fire like it’s a curtain. "Who is it that summons the one true goddess who rules the skies?"

It's quiet for a minute and where the usual Helia would definitely be annoyed by not being answered immediately, this one remains still and expectant. Monica nudges Sol and whispers, "This is where you're supposed to say, 'Hi, Mom! It's me, Sol. Can you tell my friends that you're my real mom?'"

"Uhh," Sol starts, looking over at Selene. She should probably consult with Selene before going along with this weird play/memory. Yeah, she can't keep excluding her companion from these decisions. "Time out, please? I need to ask my Selene, I mean Selene, about this." Whether or not the children agree matters not as Sol pulls Selene away from the circle. "Vibe check. Does this seem fishy to you? I kinda think playing along is not the move, but dunno. What do you think will happen if we break character?"

 

[Syntra]

Ugh. Was it really so hard to pay a reasonable amount of respect to the one true goddess? Had they not learned from, like, every single Greek myth in existence? All the pretentious kids kept referencing them, thinking that it somehow made them smart, but apparently, they failed to take away the main lesson from those stories-- namely, that goddesses shouldn't be messed with. Never! Not even once! One wouldn't have thought that that was difficult to grasp, but that hypothetical person would have been wrong, wrong, wrong, so much that their head would have burst. "I'd like to announce," Selene began, "that I do not have a girlfriend. I have never had one, and never will-- such an act would have been improper for one such as myself. Perhaps you have missed this little detail, but I am a princess! A princess isn't meant to have relations, for she needs to keep herself pure for marriage." ...officially, anyway. A confirmed relationship was a no-no, but as for happened behind the closed door? Well, that wasn't anyone's business, as long as everyone involved could maintain a... hmm, a degree of discreetness. An aura of secrecy, that was. And, when it came to her responsibilities as the high priestess? Why, everything she did was holy, and drenched in moonlight! "So, I ask you to refrain from such comments in the future. Do you not know how damaging they can be? My reputation is everything I have, ladies."

"Nerd," Phoebe smirked. "If you're a princess, where's your crown, huh? Everyone knows that princesses have crowns, silly. If you can't prove it, you're a fake! Sorry, I don't make the rules around here." Which, what!!! How dared this insignificant worm imply that she, the great Selene, was something lesser than Luna's true scion? As painfully average as them, to be exact? Oh, I will show you, alright. None of you will escape my wrath, and you shall rue the day you decided to rebel against a goddess. The moon princess snapped her fingers, and... nothing. Whereas usually, her trusty silver claws would have covered her hands, nothing happened now, as if the whole universe intended to mock her! (Were they to go through this trial defenseless, then? Stupid psychics and their stupid, arbitrary criteria, really. What was this, some program designed to make her empathize with the human feebleness? In that case, no, thank you! Selene wasn't at all interested in sinking to their pathetic, pathetic level, and wasting emotional resources on creatures as stupid struck her as an exceedingly questionable choice.)

"Still, I don't know," Selene frowned. "Haven't you learned from all those horror movies, guys? Don't summon that which you don't want to be... uh, summoned. How do we know that the sun is a good gal?" ...what? Why had she said that, of all the words she could have hurled in their direction? It almost sounded caring, which, nope, that couldn't have been healthy. A goddess existed to strike fear in her worshipers' hearts, not to... not to be their replacement mommy! "I don't like it," her mouth continued, regardless of what she thought about it. "Shouldn't we, like, at least tell our moms what we're doing? And, and, and, playing with fire is dangerous! Super duper dangerous, even. All the textbooks contain at least one cautionary story about it, so shouldn't we follow it? I mean, I don't want to become a cautionary story myself--"

"Oh my goddess, Selene, will you shut up? It's Sol's mom, geez. What do you think she could possibly to do us? Force us to eat too many candies? I, for one, welcome our sunny overlord." Yes, the moon princess wanted to say, but only because you don't know her! Because you know not the terror, the cruelty, all the things she does--

But, ah, they would know her, it seemed! Because while Selene couldn't see it, she certainly could sense it-- Helia staring at them, with her eyes that were like two cold fires. (Did you know that flames could also freeze? They could, oh, they could, and the earthy worms were about to find out.) "I don't know," Selene frowned, "feels like we're doomed either way. If this is a memory, then how are we supposed to change it? Not that I think that that's what this is, btw-- more than likely, this is some elaborate guilt trip. That's how fortune tellers make a living, you see? They convince you that you're responsible for some giant catastrophe, and miraculously, the only way to prevent it would be to send her money for the rest of her miserable life. Just you wait! That's exactly what she will tell us if you let her, my naive friend." Of course, they weren't actually friends-- that was but a figure of speech, designed to make her words flow in a more elegant way. Yes, yes! That was why it sounded right, not for any other reason.

Even dream fire was fire, though, and what did fire require? Why, its sustenance! The ashwood was but a miniscule offering, incapable of satisfying its appetite. As the two princesses spoke, it crackled and spat, and spread, spread, spread-- soon enough, the whole room was burning, like a haystack drenched in gasoline. (Why? How had this happened? The bonfire had been contained, so it had no right to claim the Tetanus Mansion like that!) "Selene! Selene, Sol!" a desperate voice cried, both close and oh so terribly distant. All around them, girls were coughing, choking on their own tears-- "Where are you? I can't... can't see. The smoke, it's everywhere! Why won't your mom help? Tell her... tell her to help!"

 

[starboob]

It's good to know that Sol isn't the only one following a mysterious script that she has definitely never studied before. See, that can be the only explanation for Selene's sudden Caring Syndrome. Bitterly, the sunbeam has to admit that it's cute seeing her so concerned for the people who must have been their friends at some point. Why can't she be like this all the time? That would be, like, really awesome. Sol doesn't want to say that she wants to stay in this weird dreamland just to spend more time with this much cooler version of Selene, but she kind of does. And why shouldn't she? Here she seems to have a lot of nice friends, Selene is still weird but she has more nice moments, and she's far away from the Sun court! This place is a literal dream.

Eh, well, it would be if these 'friends' were not trying to summon her mom. She wishes she could convince them otherwise or stop the ritual altogether, but something prevents her from saying anything to stop this scene from playing out. It's kind of why she thinks they should break from character and not go along with script––where they can at least. Besides, Selene is right. If this is a memory, they can't change it. Changing someone's memories does not rewrite the past, so really, what they should be focusing on is what do these spirits hope to gain from making them relive something that feels both real and fake at the same time? She'd investigate that thought train more, but then Selene calls her her friend for the second time today! Nevermind the naïve descriptor––Selene freaking said they're friends! Sol has no idea what changed and while she knows to be super cautious around Selene, since she has already proven herself to be an expert (almost) backstabber, Sol cannot help but get all giddy. She feels all warm and fuzzy inside. "Yeah, yeah, yeah," Sol says, totally not nervous or anything. Like, what does she have to be nervous about? That a pretty girl claimed her as a friend? Pfft! Dream on! Sol isn't a nerd. Ahem. "We're totally mcgoatly doomed," she nods, "But you know what's weird? I keep saying things I don't mean," can anyone explain how that is any different from the usual Sol? "And, like, obviously we're not totally our kid selves since we both know bringing my mom here was a bad idea. Yet we went along with it. So there must be rules to this place. Rules that say certain things have to stay––" 'the same,' she would have finished but then the smell of smoke fills her nose and when she looks over? She sees that Tetanus Mansion is at risk of burning to the ground.

"Shoot!" she rushes back over to the flames and raises her hands in an attempt to calm the inferno erupting and jumping across the old decrepit beams. While it's pretty typical that flames do not respond to Sol, this feels like an entirely different brand of off. She can't even feel the pulse or heartbeat living in the flames. (In fact, she realizes she cannot even feel the plants outside or even the quiet buzz of magic at all.) "Okay––okay, uh," she stutters, trying to remember the line from before, "Uh, hi mom! It's me Sol. Canyoupleasetellmyfriendsthatyou'remyrealmom?" But, no, it's already too late for that part of the play. Instead, Helia steps out of the curtain of fire and that only causes the flames to spread more. The coughing of the other girls fill her ears and everything in her wants to gather them together and run towards the nearest exit, but her feet remain firmly planted in place.

This awkward version of her mother stares down at Sol, bending down to get a look at her daughter. "My daughter," her voice almost sounds teary, "My daughter! At long last I have found––who are these filthy mortals? Are they your sacrifices? I told you a lamb would suffice, Sol, but I see how much you must revere me if you have brought me human flesh. Ah, my daughter! My daughter!" The not-Helia cries, throwing her arms around Sol and Sol immediately goes stiff, wanting to scream, wanting to say anything, but something in her is too completely stunned to do anything at all.

"M-mom!" she finally stammers, "Those aren't sacrifices, those are my friends! Can you make the flames go away? It's hurting them!" (That's not exactly what she wanted to say, but it sort of works.) Finally, Sol is able to wriggle away from Helia and backs up to latch onto Selene. "We just wanted to meet you and I wanted to ask if you could come to career day." (Really?)

Helia, even this not-version, does not look impressed with what her daughter says but before she speaks, her eyes hook into Selene. "So they hid you together?" she quirks a brow then frowns when she notices how Sol is clinging to Selene, "Well, this just won't do." This Helia then snaps her fingers and her entire body transforms––Sol is almost positive this is not how it happened, because her actually mom doesn't believe in using their shapeshifting abilities to take on 'less superior' forms. So she knows this isn't her actual mom. Anyway, the less superior form is something like a headless flaming beast with eyes all over its body. The weirdest thing? The other children, their friends, who had been so scared of the flames earlier, jump into the beast that had been Helia. The beast howls and then three heads spring from its body.

Phoechelica (Phoebe + Rachel + Monica), the beast howls and leers at the two young goddesses. "THIS IS HOW WE DIED!" it shouts, one head creating a fireball to hurl at them, "You know the worst part? Neither of you fessed up about the arson. Selene, you were too scared about childslaughter charges and Sol, you wanted to pretend it never happened. Our moms never found out the truth and somehow you two got off scott-free just to murder the rest of the town!"

"Are you going to make this worse, Selene?" one of the heads asks, tauntingly, "Are you going to cry for your mommy?"

 

[Syntra]

Oh, rules! At last, a semblance of sweet, sweet order in this godforsaken chaos-- a light at the end of the tunnel, if you would. Again, that Sol was the one to point it out was weird, but honestly? Selene refused to complain when the proverbial Gordona Ramsay in her head was like 'finally, some good fucking news.' "Yes!" the moon princess squealed, not caring in that moment that she must have looked about as dignified as a kitten drowning in cotton candy. "There has to be some inner logic to it, I'm sure. If I had to guess, then I'd say we are meant to see something specific-- obviously, our reactions drive the story, and so we have to say the things we are supposed to say in order to reach that plot development. I mean, that would only make sense." Presumably, though? Presumably, they were also meant to change something, otherwise the fortune teller wouldn't have fed them the nonsense about 'righting their wrongs.' Hmm, hmm. Curious, indeed! Not curious enough for Selene to actually care about those stupid people and their stupid, fire-related problems, but honestly, nothing could have accomplished that. Would you, after all, cry when the fleas in your dog's fur died? No? Then you understood how Selene felt about mortals in general.

As usual, Helia's spectacle was theatric and revolting at the same time. As in, had she not learned that mother's love was something to be used a) sparingly, b) in private, when nobody else could see? When you were a goddess, showing affection to another was a weakness, and... and Selene wasn't at all saying it just because this reminded her of how Luna had never loved her in that way, pffft. Why would you even think so? Hahaha, the theory was as outlandish as thinking that the earth was round! (...wait...) Before the moon princess could ponder over her geographical failure, however? Helia morphed into something even more disgusting than she usually was, which honestly must have broken a bunch of world records at once.

"Yeah?" Selene raised her eyebrow, tears streaming past her stitched eyes. (Huh? Ninjas must have been cutting onions in there, the moon princess was convinced, because there was no way that she'd sympathize with creatures this useless. So what if Phoebe had baked the best cookies, and Monica had wanted to become a doctor? Foolish dreams of foolish beings, captured in an illusion they thought to be reality! And Rachel? Rachel was the biggest fool of them all, for welcoming her into her inner circle when everyone else had thought she was just a big-word using meanie. For... for helping her feel at home, whatever that word even meant, and--

"It didn't happen because of that, you insufferable know-it-alls," she finally said. "Do you claim to know my own mind better than I do? Because I wasn't afraid of childslaughter charges. I was a child myself, your ridiculous spirits! There would have been no punishment, other than maybe them setting up some bogus therapy. Do you really think that me, the great Selene, wasn't aware of that?"

The fiery chimera stopped in its tracks, and the individual heads looked at one another in visible confusion.

"That's... true, I guess? It does ring true, I have to say."

"Yeah, no way that the nerd wouldn't know about every loophole," the former Phoebe frowned. "Well, why did you do it, then? So that you could chain our spirits, and laugh at us afterwards? Come on, do it, we aren't expecting anything better from you, anyway!"

...and, yeah, some of it did hurt, alright. Partially because the previous!Selene wasn't like this? The current!Selene could feel it, her despair and guilt and fear, and to listen complaints like that... well, that was like having to listen to Luna claiming her victories, but in reverse. (For some reason, it stung? Worse than actual bees stinging her, and yes, Selene did have experience with that. Let's just say that it wasn't a good idea to steal honey for your potions, instead of just buying it! Eh, each lesson had its cost.) "I was afraid, alright?" she shouted. "I didn't want it to happen, but it did, and my own mother wouldn't help. How was I supposed to look your moms in the eye? I didn't know how to deal, because I was a dumb child with the emotional maturity of a fried iguana! Look, I'm sorry, okay?" Sobs rattled her by that point, so much that she was shaking, but the the words just had to get out, out, out! Before they tore her apart, like some weird parasite from a weird movie that she absolutely hadn't seen. (Something, something, aliens? The not-memories whispered it to her, at the very least, and if nothing else, Selene could sense that it was an ally. A friendly face.)

"Besides, we didn't murder the rest of the town," Selene pursed her lips, like a kid that had just been denied candy. "There was no reason for us to do that, and so we didn't. Right, Sol? Tell them how it went down! Tell them that we... that we didn't do those things." ...hopefully, if nothing else? Because, yes, Selene was drawing a blank on some of those events-- as if they were shrouded in mist, really.

 

[starboob]

Of all the very uncomfortable experiences that Sol has ever been forced to live through, both because of who she is as a person and her status a young goddess, this has got to rank in the top one percent of all awful experiences. There's so much for her to process. Not just that she committed arson as a child, but that said arson also resulted in the death of her friends and her younger self didn't even have the guts to tell their moms it was her fault. It's even harder to swallow that she wanted to pretend it never happened. Unlike Selene, who seems to have a viable defense against her case, Sol doesn't have anything. Maybe she's too stunned to think of something or maybe she knows that they're right. Either way, the little sunbeam starts to shift uncomfortably where she stands while the flames continue to lick the building around her. (Something tells Sol that these flames, built on the hurt of her dead friends, will burn her.) Her tiny child shoulders start to shake as years of pent up and hidden guilt all break free from a crate she didn't even know existed. Even if the memories around this event are so fuzzy and so grainy that she can hardly make them out, she doesn't think the ghosts are lying to her. She wishes they were. She wishes she could be more untrusting, like Selene, if only to spare her own feelings, because with the sins of her past swallowing her whole? She doesn't know that she can take it.

Then she remembers that she has to, because this is her fault. She clenches her fists and grabs Selene's hand––something about strength in numbers, or maybe just feeling stronger when she has Selene by her side. She fights through her teary eyes and shouts, "S-stop it! We weren't cruel like that and why would we even want to chain your spirits up? You were our friends. You were the Ginger, Baby, and Posh spice to our Scary and Sporty. I'm––I'm sorry we didn't do right by your spirits and left you here to wonder about what happened, but, yeah, Selene's right. We were stupid little kids who were freaking terrified that we'd just m-worded our friends. Maybe you three would have been better than us if we were the ones who died. Maybe you would have looked our moms in the eyes," somehow she knows she's not talking about Helia and Luna, but she has no idea who else would have been their moms, "But we didn't. We were scared and can you really blame us? Do you how terrifying it is to watch someone burn?" Suddenly, parts of that memory are not so fuzzy and grainy anymore. Suddenly, she knows exactly what Rachel's face looks like all blistered and burned. She swallows hard. "I heard your screams for weeks after. I couldn't sleep." Sol blinks a few times after that admission, not knowing where it came from and knowing it's true all the same.

Protectively, Sol puts an arm around Selene while she sobs, totally not used to seeing her this way and somewhat shocked she's even capable of this range of human emotion––she honestly thought the goddess in Selene was above compassion. If the circumstances were different, she might have been able to relish in the fact that a few emotions still live in Selene. As it is, she wishes she didn't have to see her rival/maybe friend like this. Especially since this is all just so confusing! The memory is just so grainy and almost within reach, yet taunting her with how truly far away this part of her life seems to be. (If it is her life at all. She wishes it weren't but she has a feeling it is.) "I got you, Scary," she whispers, rubbing Selene's back as if she's done it before and it's the most natural thing in the world. Sol turns back to the fiery chimera and puffs up her chest as if it makes her appear any stronger. "Look, I don't... I don't remember a lot about what happened, but Selene is right. We had no reason to murder the entire town. We loved this place. We were gonna buy this haunted house and become cool local witches." The more Sol talks, the more random little bits start to come back to her. It's not enough to piece together everything, but fragile threads start make connections to those hidden parts of her brain. Again, it's hard to know if she can trust these threads, because she has other memories of her childhood, but these feel far more true to her than those other memories.

"Yeah, Sol?" the Rachel head chides, "Why should we believe you? Kind of suspicious that you and Selene got to escape and everyone else died. Was it worth losing everyone just to prove your mom is a goddess?"

"I just," Monica starts, clearly holding back her tears (she had always been a softy), "don't get why you picked her over the rest of us! I thought we all mattered––so don't throw the Spice Girls at us when you can't even admit that you didn't care about the other spices!"

This is becoming too much. Too much, too fast, too soon and Sol does not know how to deal. Yet, she knows she has to deal. Now is not the time to crumble or feel sorry for herself. She can do that later, maybe with Selene, maybe they can scream together about how weird this all is, and in order to do that? They have to make it out alive first. With her heart pounding so loudly she can barely hear herself think, she pushes onwards. "We didn't leave you all behind. We didn't. We wouldn't have done that. But when the house started to burn a lot of the other house-y stuff started to fall too," and when Sol says that, as if it were a spell, the beams start to fall from the ceiling around them. "Selene and I got trapped on one side and you three were on the other. There was a chance for us to escape and ditch, but that didn't cross either of our minds. We tried to get around the blockade, but it was on fire and my goddess powers were still dormant at the time. When we did get through it was already too late. Then we heard the sirens and, yeah, we ran for it. They didn't find your bodies. I remember we went back to scope the scene the next day and we heard the fire marshal saying it was definitely arson, but no evidence of anyone being there. We don't know what happened to your bodies or the spirit we summoned. I mean, I dunno, spirits aren't my thing but I kinda assumed that since we never heard from it again it just went... back. It wasn't my mom though and no, it wasn't worth it."

 

[Syntra]

It was bitter, not like coffee or cranberries or chicory, but like failure-- a taste that was all too familiar to her tongue, and none the better for it. The opposite was true, in fact! You know how, with some foods, it took a while till the flavor truly unfolded? How you thought ‘hmm, this isn’t too bad’ with certain chili, only for it to obliterate your taste buds a few seconds later? With disappointment, it was similar, the moon princess had found out. (It took a while for your brain to process it in its entirety, most likely. Maybe it was a protective reaction-- just like a hedgehog retreated into the safety of its spines whenever it was feeling threatened, perhaps your own mind wrapped you in numbness, till you were ready to face it. Selene had never really thought about that before, but right now? Right now, with all those images resurfacing in her memory? That truth of it was undeniable, much like the fact that the sun would rise anew each day.) “We didn’t want to do it,” she sobbed, her dignity forgotten. How could Selene even begin to care about that, really, when her chest felt so damn heavy? An arrow might as well have been stuck in there, or perhaps a whole anchor! (In hindsight, that might have been why she didn’t chase Sol away. The touch was grounding, in a surprisingly pleasant way, and… well, let’s just say that holding something undeniably real was precious, in this hellish world of not-illusions. Don’t get her wrong, though! The comfort had absolutely nothing to do with the fact that Sol of all people was holding her, thank you very much-- anyone warm enough not to feel like a corpse would have served, really.) “It was… it was an accident,” the princess tried to explain. “Besides, you wanted us to prove it! You kept asking and asking and asking, and we didn’t even want to summon her, but you, Monica, called us liars. What were we supposed to do? Sol had to defend her honor!”

“I dunno, not kill us? That would have been pretty fucking awesome,” Phoebe snarled.

“Yeah, are you saying we asked for it? Had we known your proof involved us getting burnt to death, we would have passed on it so hard that… that we would have passed out!” Monica joined her friend in her indignation. “You may be sorry, but what does that change, huh? Can you return our lives to us? Can you give us back what you have stolen?”

“Well, no,” Selene admitted, tears still streaming down her face. (Damn, damn, damn. Why was it so difficult to speak? It felt as if some invisible hand was holding her by the throat, and squeezing the oxygen out of her lungs! …what a curious biological function. What could be the reason behind implementing it, hmm? If there was an evolutionary benefit to turning into a nervous wreck whenever your emotions got too much to bear, then the moon princess failed to see it. It’s the fault of this stupid body, she thought, in between sobs. My real self wouldn’t have been this weak. Yes, yes, the fortune teller had caused it, possibly for her own twisted entertainment! The great Selene, Luna’s only scion, never would have succumbed to such ridiculous emotions, and everyone knew that. Had she done it so that she could blackmail her later? Quickly, the moon princess made a mental note to watch out for such manipulation techniques.) “That we cannot do. Human souls are too fragile to survive the journey, so, uh, it’s not possible for us to drag them back. I’m sorry, but they would get torn to pieces.”

“Some goddesses you are!” Rachel stomped her foot, with all the grace of a nine-year-old. “Are you really only good for destruction? If so, then I cannot imagine why we need you at all. Had it not been for you parasites, I could have been failing my first college course by now! Is that your idea of justice? Of friendship?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Rachel,” one of the girls rolled her eyes as the world around them burned, and when she did so? The fire flared, as if it could sense her distress. (The flames danced, as far as the eye could see, and where their feet landed, destruction followed-- furniture was reduced to ashes within seconds, faster than you could take a breath. And, the worst aspect of this? They were inching ever closer, right to the spot where Sol and Selene were standing!) “Do you think they care about things such as friendship? The esteemed goddesses have never once considered us their equals, you can see that plainly! Why do you think they can speak of our deaths with such nonchalance, hmm?” And, no, Selene knew that it wasn’t true-- that, at some point in her life, the trio had meant everything to her, although perhaps not as much as Sol had. (Wait, what?!) “Although, fine, let’s say that I actually buy into your lies. All of that was just a, quote unquote, terrible accident, and you are very sorry for your crimes. Sounds fake, but okay. If that is true, why did the rest of the town burn as well? Does fire just happen to like our hometown? I mean, that’s a lot of funny coincidences, isn’t it? I’m sure that you are absolutely innocent in this, just like you are innocent in everything else!”