ellarose
🌈babe with the power✨ 💖✨👾✨🌈✨👾✨💖
Juno's been tugging at her jumpsuit zipper the way Lettie used to tug at her bracelet. Her mind lingers on it the third time she sees it happen... and identifies it as part of a larger problem the afternoon she notices that it's soaked to her skin. The faerie couldn't have changed out of her own jumpsuit faster, as it had done little more than remind her of that awful place and what sort of a life they were trying to force them into. (Trying to control her to the point that they also intended to control her wardrobe. She's had enough of that bullshit for a lifetime, thanks.) When her cube-sanctioned wardrobe returned, she dug out a set of cozy pink silk pajamas. (If this is the time they have to rest before they're thrown back into the fray, she needs to do it right.) Even with all of their clothes returned to them, Juno still doesn't change her clothes. At first she thought it might be distraction. The pirate has been very distracted... but it's gone on a few days now, with her continuously pulling at that zipper, that she knows it's something more. She used to be overly vigilant herself, twisting her bracelet around to ensure it always hid the scar on her wrist. When she didn't have to look at it, she could forget that it was there and that she'd been marked.
Doesn't change the truth, though. And Lettie knows ignoring her truth in favor of ignorant bliss will only cause it to catch up to her someday. Eventually, she's going to run out of time. She hasn't been home to work... and she has a hunch she may be doing the exact opposite of what the people paying her want her to do with the cube. For a while, she tried to tell herself the research would save her. She'd bring something valuable home and the corp would rescue her from the slippery slope towards the Reaper's waiting maw. Now that hope has been stamped out as well. The sound of chains drags through her mind, they get closer and closer every fucking day. Going back to Avangeline is a death sentence.
Juno's been carrying something heavy around with her these days. Enough that Lettie's worried it's going to shatter her half of the time. She's strong, yes, and that will never change. Never. Of course she's been going through it after their return... she has all the reasons in the worlds to be freaked the freak out. On top of that, no one-- no matter how stupidly buff-- should be expected to carry the weight of an entire world without their knees buckling or completely giving along the way. (And they've got a seemingly infinite amount of worlds piled on their backs these days.) Nerves fill her stomach enough to dissolve her appetite, thoughts throw obstacles into her research as she wonders what it is exactly and what she can do to help. But the faerie doesn't press too fiercely this time. She doesn't get the impression that Juno's hiding anything from her on purpose, especially when she asks her to stay at night. (She stays. Of course she stays.)
Lettie can't muster the strength push or demand that Juno open up to her when she can't do the same. It's unfair. (She's been terrified to let her own fears and stresses show. She's terrified of the questions, of not being able to answer them and the impressions Juno might receive from her silence.) That's not to say that she doesn't want the pirate to open up or that she won't hear her out when the time comes. She'll be there for her whenever she's ready and can only hope that her presence shows her intentions when her words may not be able to tell the full story. When the day comes that Juno opens up, she's there. 'I'm here. I'll stay as long as you want me to.' She'd stay forever if she could. Even through these moments, even when Juno's not feeling her strongest.
'There could be others watching us. There probably are.' Lettie can't help the way her cheeks (and wings) lose their color at that. It scrapes against what she knows, it scrapes against the guilt she's been fighting to push back. She wraps her arms around herself and clenches her toes. On some level, she knows logically there's nothing suspicious about her reaction. Everything Juno went through back there-- she went through it, too. And her concerns are all valid. She swallows the rock-shaped lump in her throat and nods solemnly. Maybe just a little of her story would suffice? Just to get this crushing weight off her chest! ...But the more questions she has to dodge or outright lie in response to, the deeper the grave she may dig herself later. ('Loyalty is the only currency.' Juno deserves someone loyal. More than anyone. Lettie wants to be that someone... but she can't be that someone when she's fucking...) Shit. Fuck. Damn it. Juno continues before she finds the courage to even attempt putting even a portion of her clusterfuck life into words.
Lettie can't let herself lose sight of what's most important, though, and that's the pirate sitting right in front of her. She banishes her thoughts, bringing Juno back into focus. Juno and her fidgeting hands. Juno and the tremble of her words. Juno and the tears she's fighting. She's trusting her with the softest parts of herself... and that's what matters now. She's telling her without words that she needs her. This becomes more evident with every single word that she speaks. The faerie gives her the time to unload everything that's been on her mind without interrupting. I don't think I can do this anymore. She's gutted by these words, quickly trying to ignore the implications of that-- of what it might mean going forward. (Because if this ends, then...) But, no. She's not going to be selfish about this. Of course Juno doesn't want to put up with this shit anymore. She shouldn't have to if that's not what she wants. (She doesn't like to fight.)
"Look at me. I'm real." Lettie says gently, taking Juno's hands in her own and squeezing. Then she brings her hands up to either side of her face, catching tears on the pads of her thumbs. "You're real, too."
Lettie blinks through her own tears before they can fully form. (Seeing her like this is just...) She has to try her best be strong in moments where Juno doesn't feel strong enough. Even though she is. She's the strongest person Lettie knows. Perhaps haven stronger now for coming to her with this, for opening up.
"I'm pretty sure those bastards just took some of our DNA and mixed it with the corrupted corrupted nightmare energy to make that creature." Lettie continues, her hands sliding down from Juno's face to her shoulders. She kneads her fingers against her gently, offering a massage. "That's the impression I got when I saw it with those goggles on. They were a lot like mine... sort of an x-ray for magic." Briefly, she pauses as she considers it further. "I saw you through those lenses and didn't see anything strange." That's true. She didn't have time to take them off, too busy hacking the monstrosity to shreds before she ended up crashing into Juno. The faerie purses her lips. "...That doesn't change the fact that they might've had us locked up in a lab with nightmare fumes in the air or some shit. You might've woken up while they were taking DNA and the nightmares in the lab just intensified your perception of reality. 'Course, that's just speculation on my part." They did have that giant saw over an operating table. She shudders. They could've done something... but the also could've had that setup specifically to fuck with their heads. "You're still you, no matter what... and you need to take this thing off already." She pinches very lightly at the jumpsuit fabric around her shoulder and attempts a smile. "It'd be a shame to hide those stupidly buff muscles forever." Ah, geez! She blushes and shakes her head quickly. "Seriously, though. Knowing for sure is gonna stop you from wondering and tormenting yourself. And if there is a new scar we'll figure it out together. I'm not going anywhere." Seeing as she didn't find anything weird on her own body, she has a feeling it'll be the same for Juno. But she's not going to discredit her fears... she saw what she saw. She believes her.
"Being scared doesn't mean you're not strong. And I completely understand if you don't want to go back there." Lettie nods, circling back to the duchess. Now she brings her hands down Juno's arms, back to take her hands again. She looks at them, interlocked, and bites her lip. After what she did for her. The faerie looks the pirate in the eye again."And you don't have to go back there, Juno. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do." She means this earnestly. Even if she wishes they could continue pursuing this mission side by side, she wouldn't force her. Those memories she saw before... she doesn't know the context. But she saw the chains and that's enough to convince her. Hell, she doesn't want that fucking duchess within ten feet of her pirate. "It's a heist, right? That just so happens to be my specialty. With the cube teleporting..." She shrinks herself down to her small (smaller) size and twirls. "And my tiny form, I bet we could get in and out of there lickety split before the duchess even knows what hit her."
"Just take your time thinking about what you want to do, okay? But first... let's try and put your worries to bed so you can put yourself to bed." Lettie nods sagely and then, before she even thinks about what she's doing, flies up to press a tiny kiss to Juno's forehead. The entirety of her blooms pink as a rose at this. Quickly, she attempts to recover. "You'll just... you'll have more clarity once you get some sleep. Y'know?" Nerd, nerd, nerd.
Doesn't change the truth, though. And Lettie knows ignoring her truth in favor of ignorant bliss will only cause it to catch up to her someday. Eventually, she's going to run out of time. She hasn't been home to work... and she has a hunch she may be doing the exact opposite of what the people paying her want her to do with the cube. For a while, she tried to tell herself the research would save her. She'd bring something valuable home and the corp would rescue her from the slippery slope towards the Reaper's waiting maw. Now that hope has been stamped out as well. The sound of chains drags through her mind, they get closer and closer every fucking day. Going back to Avangeline is a death sentence.
Juno's been carrying something heavy around with her these days. Enough that Lettie's worried it's going to shatter her half of the time. She's strong, yes, and that will never change. Never. Of course she's been going through it after their return... she has all the reasons in the worlds to be freaked the freak out. On top of that, no one-- no matter how stupidly buff-- should be expected to carry the weight of an entire world without their knees buckling or completely giving along the way. (And they've got a seemingly infinite amount of worlds piled on their backs these days.) Nerves fill her stomach enough to dissolve her appetite, thoughts throw obstacles into her research as she wonders what it is exactly and what she can do to help. But the faerie doesn't press too fiercely this time. She doesn't get the impression that Juno's hiding anything from her on purpose, especially when she asks her to stay at night. (She stays. Of course she stays.)
Lettie can't muster the strength push or demand that Juno open up to her when she can't do the same. It's unfair. (She's been terrified to let her own fears and stresses show. She's terrified of the questions, of not being able to answer them and the impressions Juno might receive from her silence.) That's not to say that she doesn't want the pirate to open up or that she won't hear her out when the time comes. She'll be there for her whenever she's ready and can only hope that her presence shows her intentions when her words may not be able to tell the full story. When the day comes that Juno opens up, she's there. 'I'm here. I'll stay as long as you want me to.' She'd stay forever if she could. Even through these moments, even when Juno's not feeling her strongest.
'There could be others watching us. There probably are.' Lettie can't help the way her cheeks (and wings) lose their color at that. It scrapes against what she knows, it scrapes against the guilt she's been fighting to push back. She wraps her arms around herself and clenches her toes. On some level, she knows logically there's nothing suspicious about her reaction. Everything Juno went through back there-- she went through it, too. And her concerns are all valid. She swallows the rock-shaped lump in her throat and nods solemnly. Maybe just a little of her story would suffice? Just to get this crushing weight off her chest! ...But the more questions she has to dodge or outright lie in response to, the deeper the grave she may dig herself later. ('Loyalty is the only currency.' Juno deserves someone loyal. More than anyone. Lettie wants to be that someone... but she can't be that someone when she's fucking...) Shit. Fuck. Damn it. Juno continues before she finds the courage to even attempt putting even a portion of her clusterfuck life into words.
Lettie can't let herself lose sight of what's most important, though, and that's the pirate sitting right in front of her. She banishes her thoughts, bringing Juno back into focus. Juno and her fidgeting hands. Juno and the tremble of her words. Juno and the tears she's fighting. She's trusting her with the softest parts of herself... and that's what matters now. She's telling her without words that she needs her. This becomes more evident with every single word that she speaks. The faerie gives her the time to unload everything that's been on her mind without interrupting. I don't think I can do this anymore. She's gutted by these words, quickly trying to ignore the implications of that-- of what it might mean going forward. (Because if this ends, then...) But, no. She's not going to be selfish about this. Of course Juno doesn't want to put up with this shit anymore. She shouldn't have to if that's not what she wants. (She doesn't like to fight.)
"Look at me. I'm real." Lettie says gently, taking Juno's hands in her own and squeezing. Then she brings her hands up to either side of her face, catching tears on the pads of her thumbs. "You're real, too."
Lettie blinks through her own tears before they can fully form. (Seeing her like this is just...) She has to try her best be strong in moments where Juno doesn't feel strong enough. Even though she is. She's the strongest person Lettie knows. Perhaps haven stronger now for coming to her with this, for opening up.
"I'm pretty sure those bastards just took some of our DNA and mixed it with the corrupted corrupted nightmare energy to make that creature." Lettie continues, her hands sliding down from Juno's face to her shoulders. She kneads her fingers against her gently, offering a massage. "That's the impression I got when I saw it with those goggles on. They were a lot like mine... sort of an x-ray for magic." Briefly, she pauses as she considers it further. "I saw you through those lenses and didn't see anything strange." That's true. She didn't have time to take them off, too busy hacking the monstrosity to shreds before she ended up crashing into Juno. The faerie purses her lips. "...That doesn't change the fact that they might've had us locked up in a lab with nightmare fumes in the air or some shit. You might've woken up while they were taking DNA and the nightmares in the lab just intensified your perception of reality. 'Course, that's just speculation on my part." They did have that giant saw over an operating table. She shudders. They could've done something... but the also could've had that setup specifically to fuck with their heads. "You're still you, no matter what... and you need to take this thing off already." She pinches very lightly at the jumpsuit fabric around her shoulder and attempts a smile. "It'd be a shame to hide those stupidly buff muscles forever." Ah, geez! She blushes and shakes her head quickly. "Seriously, though. Knowing for sure is gonna stop you from wondering and tormenting yourself. And if there is a new scar we'll figure it out together. I'm not going anywhere." Seeing as she didn't find anything weird on her own body, she has a feeling it'll be the same for Juno. But she's not going to discredit her fears... she saw what she saw. She believes her.
"Being scared doesn't mean you're not strong. And I completely understand if you don't want to go back there." Lettie nods, circling back to the duchess. Now she brings her hands down Juno's arms, back to take her hands again. She looks at them, interlocked, and bites her lip. After what she did for her. The faerie looks the pirate in the eye again."And you don't have to go back there, Juno. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do." She means this earnestly. Even if she wishes they could continue pursuing this mission side by side, she wouldn't force her. Those memories she saw before... she doesn't know the context. But she saw the chains and that's enough to convince her. Hell, she doesn't want that fucking duchess within ten feet of her pirate. "It's a heist, right? That just so happens to be my specialty. With the cube teleporting..." She shrinks herself down to her small (smaller) size and twirls. "And my tiny form, I bet we could get in and out of there lickety split before the duchess even knows what hit her."
"Just take your time thinking about what you want to do, okay? But first... let's try and put your worries to bed so you can put yourself to bed." Lettie nods sagely and then, before she even thinks about what she's doing, flies up to press a tiny kiss to Juno's forehead. The entirety of her blooms pink as a rose at this. Quickly, she attempts to recover. "You'll just... you'll have more clarity once you get some sleep. Y'know?" Nerd, nerd, nerd.