Corrupt a Wish

Granted, but you become a slave. You earn nothing, own nothing. There is nothing more stable than always having nothing.

I wish I could have the best role play ever!
 
Granted, but you obsess over that role-play, and seclude yourself from everything, and everyone..

I wish I was more persuasive.
 
At the time of your wish, you weren't persuasive enough to get me to grant the wish. Better luck next time tho!

I wish I could freely control the weather in a zone 5 meters around me.
 
You can only turn it back by one second, and only once per hour.

I wish to be a harem Protagonist
Granted, but your harem pesters you to no end, ensuring your demise in a short span of 2 weeks from over-exhaustion.

I wish that I could quick save and load in my daily life, as many times as I wanted to, with no repercussions.
 
Granted. You can now do such in the daily life you’ve created for yourself as a Sim in Sims 4.

I wish I could eat all my favorite foods and enjoy them with no consequences.
 
Granted, you'll be in a state of constant hunger so you always have the ability to eat and enjoy them.

I wish my favorite fictional character was real and was my best friend forever.
 
Granted but they will annoy and push away the people near to you. Leaving the two of you, as best friends, together forever.

I wish for another wish
 
Granted, and so begins the endless chain of wishes that accomplishes absolutely nothing.

I wish I could shape shift.
 
Granted. Your wish is granted, in the shape of- well, however your imagination wants to shape it, I suppose. But how many sides are there to nature? You don't know. But you do know what it means in the literal sense - how many sides on a polygon. The one-sided circles, the four-sided rectangles, and so on. You can change shapes on posters, papers, and printed patterns, and pretty soon you'll be moving on to three-dimensional shapes like cups and bricks. But it'll take you centuries to figure out how to shift the shape of life. Do you have that much time? It's not my problem anymore.

I wish to speak with your manager.
 
Granted. Your wish is granted, in the shape of- well, however your imagination wants to shape it, I suppose. But how many sides are there to nature? You don't know. But you do know what it means in the literal sense - how many sides on a polygon. The one-sided circles, the four-sided rectangles, and so on. You can change shapes on posters, papers, and printed patterns, and pretty soon you'll be moving on to three-dimensional shapes like cups and bricks. But it'll take you centuries to figure out how to shift the shape of life. Do you have that much time? It's not my problem anymore.

I wish to speak with your manager.
Granted, your name automatically changes to Karen and you sport the classic Karen platinum bob cut. Also, my manager says the exact same thing I said, ITS STORE POLICY MA'AM!

I wish that Robin Williams was still alive.
 
(Same :/ ) Granted but hes forever trapped in the many movies hes portayes in. His physical body unable to return. Though during these movies he is conscious of the outside world and tries to get your attention.

I wish my ankle wasnt broken and That I could go back to work Dx
 
(Same :/ ) Granted but hes forever trapped in the many movies hes portayes in. His physical body unable to return. Though during these movies he is conscious of the outside world and tries to get your attention.

I wish my ankle wasnt broken and That I could go back to work Dx

Granted, but as soon as you return to work, you're fired.

I wish it stayed fall forever.
 
Granted, but as soon as you return to work, you're fired.

I wish it stayed fall forever.

Granted, and it’s forever allergy season now. Even if you’re not allergic yourself, have fun with the knowledge that every single thing has most likely been sneezed on by someone. Including your food. Bon appetit!

I wish the human race was kinder.
 
Granted. I turned off the earth's gravity, now water won't fall out of the shower. Have fun not floating away.

I wish I could take a trip to mars.
 
Granted. But happiness doesn't exist either.

I wish we got a fourth season of the original Avatar the Last Airbender.
 
Granted, but it's an absolute embarrassment to the series and ruins it completely.

I wish for me and my loved ones to be exempt from the Purge.
 
Granted. You and your loved ones spontaneously die, thereby ensuring exemption from the Purge.

I wish I was immortal.
 
Granted. Your name is now Immort- ha, just kidding. That wouldn't be fun, now, would it?

Ever been in a pantheon before? We've got lots of gods. Major gods, too, but mostly minor gods ranging from ordinary to "wait, we have a god for that?" I tried to put you in for something good, but don't expect a miracle 'cause I'm just a goddamn genie. I think I heard they were gonna make you the god of Blockbuster stores or something. Didn't even think those still existed anymore, but I guess you'll have something to watch over while you're sitting up in the clouds.

I wish for a hot cup of coffee so I can spill it on the son of a bitch typing a response beneath me.
 
Granted, but a wizard cast a spell on me so I would be resistant to the hot coffee being poured on me.

I wish I could get anyone who crosses me in trouble with the law.
 

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