Beneath the fear

[TheSpaceInBetween]

(Searching for a doctor for this thread)


Over the years Chris had learnt to stay still whenever he has visits from his father. Often he would just use his fists and feet to break Chris's body down, other times he would be more creative, using kitchen knives and scalding hot water. Ropes and wires that delivered sharp shocks to the body. Each object was used with such malice that Chris never knew how to react. But he had to stay still and silent, the slightest peep would have made the whole ordeal much worse.


He sat quietly in the corner of his "room" his hands tapping together softly, his right hand was bound with a thin rope that was tight around his skin, bleeding and sore from years of pulling and being thrown around like a rag doll. He did try to escape but only ended up biting his hand, at least that way he knew he was still there. Pain was a reminder of terror, and terror knew Chris very well.


He sat in pitch black, the only escape was when the door was opened, he would get a blast of fresh air as well as a beam of soft light. It was the only thing he looked forward too.


He scratched at his hair, nearly falling out and tangled from lack of food and hygiene, the scratching moved to the rest of his body knocking slowly healing wounds so they would bleed again.


His head tilted at the sounds coming from the door, his father sounded angry. That was never good. He whimpered softly pushing himself deeper in the corner in order to escape the loud noise. His breathing picked up and he shielded himself from the light as best he could with a bound hand and limited movement.


" Oh my gosh.." That was not his father's voice..it was another man entirely. Chris peeked from his elbow to see the man better, dressed in a strange coloured uniform, with shiny bits on it. The shiny bits could hurt Chris! He shook his head and turned his body away tugging his hair sharply, strands coming away with his fingers.


The man crouched down and began speaking to Chris obviously he didn't know what he was saying, he wasn't used to kind soft words. Anger and hate was all Chris recognised as well as pain he was terrified. He began to shiver as the fresh air from the door being open made him cold, he had next to nothing on in terms of clothes. A torn ragged shirt and a pair of over soiled underwear, plus he had not fat on his body at all he was just bones.


He was too busy whimpering and shivering like a nervous wreck that he didn't notice the rope holding him had been cut and a soft cloth had been draped over his body. It was very warm and soft so very soft, he ran his fingers over the cloth examining the texture with his fingers.


Then assuming all fears he was picked up by the soft speaking man, he struggled and whimpered not used to being held in such a way it made his body feel very uncomfortable and it hurt too. He pulled his hair again and being so scared and nervous he evacuated his bladder all over the strange dressed man. He screwed his eyes shut as he was taken out of the room he had spent most of his life in, everything was bright and so noisy!


He moaned softly burying his head into the soft cloth blanket, the gentle touch soothing him as he continued to shake. Chris peeked a glance outside and there was so many people, lights were flashing and sirens and shouting. Chris's breathing began to pick up and struggle desperately to get away that was until a sharp pain, different to what he felt before made him feel fuzzy and floppy, his head spun and he closed his eyes falling into a warm oblivion.


Chris coughed softly as he awoke and slowly opened his eyes, panic immeadeatlly began. Where was he? He looked around , this wasn't his room. His body was covered in white things and wires! He was wearing a strange dress that was a little rough on his skin, he went to pull his hair but found it gone. It was short now he couldn't pull it... His nails were cut and his body was clean what was going on? Something was on his hand, the sore infected one. It felt a little better, sure it still hurt but it was more numb now.


He pushed up on his arm as he legs pulled in pain after being sat so long every movement was painful. Wincing softly he ran fingers over the white things on his arms, they must have been covering something. He looked to the door as it opened his eyes wide in fear his body frozen solid in terror, breathing rapid. Had to hide, had to hide. He slid painfully off the bed to the floor, he couldn't hide under the bed it looked scary under there, then he saw a sink. Pipes! He knew pipes, shuffling over to the pipes he grabbed onto them tightly hugging his frail body close to his chest humming to himself eyes darting around the room.

 

[Oldfashioned]

Alexander had read and studied cases about abuse and neglect, but he never thought throughout his years of pre-medical school and medical that he himself would actually work on a case as bad as this. He'd seen a lot of terrible things after school and his residency. He had watched people who should have lived die, far to young. He watched the elderly suffer for to many years and had become slightly numb to it all. He had to, if he let it all build up and bother him he'd never last as a doctor. Alex still helped people and was kind and compassionate but he was certain he'd never see anything that would shock him again.


The world was a terrible place, but he got to help people and that helped him get through the day. It had actually been a rather good day, no one had spit, voided, or had a bowel movement on him. Which was always nice and happened more often than one would think, so much so that he honestly wasn't phased when it happened that's what he extra scrubs and clothes were for after all. However when he saw the police come into the hospital he knew the day was going to take a turn for the worse. But he didn't expect it to be so bad that it managed to shock and horrify him.


There on a gurney was a malnourished, beaten, teenager who at first glance looked dead. Sadly no this boy's suffering wasn't over he'd just been sedated by the paramedics who had gone with the police to look into the abuse allegations. Which clearly were true and quite shockingly had gone on for what looked like years. He began the admissions paperwork all the while wondering who could hurt a child the boy wasn't in his twenties yet, though it was hard to tell just how old he was given the state he was in.


He could smell the urine on the boy, and later heard that he'd voided on the officer who carried him out of the room he was kept in. As soon as the paperwork was done he went in and observed as the nurses helped to get him cleaned up and changed into the gown, if he hadn't seen it with his own eyes he wouldn't have believed the full extent of the damage the boy had received. Who knew how much more damage would come to light when he woke up. Then began the long process of documenting every single wound's size, location, and possibly cause. He honestly couldn't believe that he'd been able to survive as long as he did in the state he was in.


At last the he was able to get the boy's name and age, Chris and he was seventeen. The abuse had been going on for years the skin examination proved that alone, and the x-rays only added to the terrible story Chris's body was telling. Once he was done with the x-rays and put in his own room, Alex gave him another once over. He looked better now that he was clean, and his hair had been cut but that was only the tip of the iceberg. Chris would probably need to work with physical therapists, speech therapists, physiologists, and probably all sorts of specialists. He carefully checked the wound on his hand, that one had been infected and needed to be treated, once he was satisfied that the area was clean he applied a bit more antibiotic ointment to it and changed the bandages.


After that he checked the monitors and jotted down some notes on Chris's chart. Then he took his leave as there wasn't much more he could do until until the boy woke up. Alex had a good idea of when that would be so for until then he checked on his other patients but, he wasn't looking forward to his examination of Chris given his history he'd probably be bitten, hit, or any number of things he'd actually been able to avoid today up till now.


Alex kept an eye on the time, and slowly made his way down the long hallway until he came to Chris's room. Normally he would have knocked before he opened the door, but he didn't was to startle the child anymore than he already would be. However it seemed that the boy was terrified already. Alex immediately noticed the boy wasn't in the but had made his way over to the sink and was clinging to the pipes for dear life. He took a breath and smiled, "It's okay now, you are safe no here will hurt you." He said softly, though he knew he was probably going to cause th poor kid some discomfort when he started to examine him.


"I'm Doctor Monroe, I just want to look in your eyes, ears, nose and mouth." He said as he slowly made his way over to Chris pausing to point at each part he talked about. Once he was about two feet away from the other male he crouched down, and smiled. "I just want to help you feel better." He said keeping his voice low and calm. "Can I see your hand, please?" He asked extendin his own hand cautiously towards Chris. "I know this is a scary new place, but it's safe, warm, and nice." He said sincerely.

 

[TheSpaceInBetween]

Chris hummed to himself rocking back and forth quickly, he squinted a little, his hands planted hard on his head. The room was so bright and such space!. Chris was used to darkness and cold, being pushed so far into a corner with pipes and steam, not to a large room full of scary machines. Machines were used on Chris , to shock him over and over again so he had ripped off the electrodes attached to him. Knocking down the beeping machine as he fell out of the bed, to search for a hiding place.


At the sound of the door opening, Chris closed his eyes tightly his hands shielding her head, head had to be protected. Blows to the head really hurt, more so than other parts of the body. Chris peaked from his fingers to look at the intruder, it was a man. A man had short hair so it must have been a man.


As he began to approach him Chris's body shook and he gave out a high pitch yelp, similar to a fox cub or a terrified dog. He looked around the room trying to find somewhere else to hide, he couldn't not without passing the man. Chris held onto the water pipes tightly, tucking his head into his chest, knees against his forehead. Shivering and grumbling to himself.


Chris hummed as he could hear the man walking towards him, his eyes watch briefly as he pointed to his ears, eyes, nose and mouth. He was going to do something to him! Chris shook his head rocking back and forth, humming loudly a single monotone drone like a AC vent on its way out of action.


Chris stopped rocking and became dead silent as the man crouched down, rather close than he would have liked, when ever his father got that close he knew to switch off, his body and mind becoming one and the same. Numb to all feelings, made a noise or moved equalled more pain, worse pain usually. He extended his hand out reaching for Chris's hand, although Chris didn't move he yelped again tucking his hands under his armpit. He put his infected hand into his mouth, trying to find that source of comfort. He gagged and retched at the taste of his hand, taking it out of his mouth he looked at the bandage over his hand. It tasted awful and Chris had tasted some pretty awful stuff in his long life. Moaning to himself he put his other hand into his mouth sucking on it gently, eyes still darting around the room. His feet shuffled, his joints feeling less stiff than they would normally be, he was wedged so far into that corner that pain had become normal comfort. That impossibly tight sitting possition was normal for him now.

 

[Oldfashioned]

He was couldn't say he was suprised with the way Chris was acting, given all the givens. Namely the abuse and the completely new environment, it was no wonder the boy was doing his best to hide and find a place where most of his body would be shielded from blows. Alex would gwt the machines upright later, right now his main concern was was boy cowering in the corner. The yelp he hadn't been expecting it was more animalistic than human.


Seeing that he didn't respond verbally to his greeting or request, Alex was led to believe that Chris hadn't spoken in years or he never learned how to speak in the first place. Either of those theories were horrible to think about, but this meant that communication was going to be more difficult than he'd originally thought.


He shook his head though so he knew that meant no anyway, at least that's what he thought but he'd hold off on that until he was sure. He listened to the moaning noise coming from the young man, he was a bit surprised when the noise and the rocking stopped. As that seemed to be his way of comforting himself, Alex stopped reaching for the other's hand when he yelped once more and shoved the bandaged hand into his mouth only to immediately replace it with the other hand.


It wasn't something a teenager wouldn'thave done but rather something a toddler might do. So he had to wonder if the abuse stated around that time for Chris. Alex was slightly impressed at how far the young boy had managed to get wedged into that corner. "I know you don't know me and you probably don't like men but we are stuck together buddy." He said softly and slowly placed his hand lightly on the top of his head and lightly ran his hand through the boy's freshly cut hair. "I won't hurt you, I want to help you." He smiled and stood up, "I have to get you to trust me." He thought aloud and made his way over to the bed and pulled off one of the blankets.


With the blanket in hand he walked back over to Chris slowly and calmly. He knew that if he got worked up Chris would sense that and that would make things worse. Luckily he had built up his patience through his eight years of school and seven years of practicing medicine had left the thirty-three year old man rather tolerate to most things. Unfortunately it had also made him a bit jaded in other aspects but, he never lost the reason for becoming a doctor, to help. Alex crouched back down next Chris this time though he draped the blanket over him and smiled, "There, that's better." Alex said softly and cautiously reached for the boy's head once more. Rubbing his head served two purposes, one it offered him some soothing human contact and two it gave him a chance to feel any bumps or other wounds he might have missed. "You'll be okay, it's all going to be okay." He said soothingly as though he was comforting a smaller child.

 

[TheSpaceInBetween]

Chris grumbled to himself, his eyes flickered from the room to the man crouched in front of him. As he reached forward Chris pushed his head back into the wall, his breathing climbing to a rapid pace. He was going to hurt him! It was going to hurt! He screwed his eyes shut and hummed softly.


He winced at the touch to his head, not really expecting such a odd and soft gesture, he hummed softly as his hand traced slowly over his head. It felt odd, he was always expecting pain so kindness made no sense whatsoever.


Soon enough he got up and walked to the bed, picking up a blanket and walking over to him. Chris helped loudly again, fearing what the blanket would do. He was going to wrap him up so tight he couldn't breath, or hide something in there to beat him with. These situation rotated around in Chris's head, rocking back and forth slowly, he hummed again watching him warily.


Chris braced himself for the impact, that horrid pain but nothing came. The blanket swamped his small frame and he felt a little warmer although still shook in fear and anxiety. He squeaked and his body stiffened as he put his hand on his head again, his hands trembled heavily and he put his hand in his mouth sucking it still rocking back and forth and humming. But he was allowing this man to be close to him, he was still scared but there was something about him.


His eyes took in everything, the color or lack thereof of the walls, the size and shape of the bed and strange equipment. The feel of the blanket, the smell he hadn't tasted it yet but there was time. his hand still stayed on the pipes he could feel the hum of the water and how cold it was.


Chris shrugged off the man's contact gettin enough of it now, it was nice but he didn't want anymore. Rubbing his eyes he yawned lightly, smacking his lips together he looked at the pipes feeling with his hand which was cold an which was not. He stuff his tounge out and licked the piped, not that bad. He was used to hot steam pipes, collecting condensation or even cold ones too. Moaning he tapped the pipes with his fingers.

 

[Oldfashioned]

It was one thing to see the physical damage the boy had been, but it was a completely different beast to see the emotional, physiological, and developmental damage. It would be a long road to recovery, worth it but it would be long, hard, and frustrating for everyone involved. It was hard to see wince at the gentle touch and even harder to see him try and understand what it meant. Then there was the blanket, he was afraid of something that even babies found comfort in. What Hell his life must have been, his evaluations were going to hard to conduct, it made him wonder if he should be looking an infant and toddler growth charts for some things.


One his hand was shrugged off Alex nodded, "I agree I'm not on for all that mushy stuff either, but you my dear need it." He smiled and watched curiously as the boy rubbed his eyes, smacked his lips, and then licked the pipe. It was clean as every inch of the room would have been cleaned just before he had arrived in the room. Then he moaned and tapped the pipe, it said to Alex that appearantly the pipe was not doing what it was supposed to. So it was either supposed to provide warmth or water, at least those were the only two things that came to the doctor's mind.


With that he stood up again and walked over to the bed and sighed, "You certainly made a mess of these monitors, well it'll give us something to later I suppose." He commented looking at the machines on the floor and then he pushed the call light button. Soon enough a nurse or C.N.A. would and see what was needed, it was supposed to be under fifteen minutes but that didn't always happen. He looked at Chris and smiled, "How about something to eat and drink? Then maybe a trip to the bathroom and may e another nap?" He suggested softly.


Soon after there was a knock on the door, "Come in." Alex called and in entered a petite woman with her long blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail, she was wearing light pink scrubs, had her name badge pinned to her right breastfeeding pocket. She looked at Alex then at the boy, "Do you need any help?" She asked. "Not just yet, but I do need to get him some lunch, the roast beef with lots of mashed potatoes and gravy, some applesauce, jello, and a boost shake, milk and water." He replied and she nodded writing down what he said on a small pad of paper, "I'll be right back, do you want me to feed him?" "No, I'll do it, all.my other patients are fine and he's the priority right now and it's a bit difficult to get things done with him there so I'm going to try and bride him with food, oh you should get a cookie too." He added. The nurse nodded and walked out of the room and closed the door.


Alex sat down on the bed and patted the area next him, "You can sit next to me, I'm not gonna hurt you and if you need a shot I'll have Jenny do it, she's good at giving shots." He chuckled softly, "Unfortunately you probably will have to have some but I'll hold your hand if you need me to." He said and smiled at Chris observing him while they waited for his food to come. About ten minutes later there was a knock on the door, "Come in." Alex called again, shortly after the same nurse entered the room with a tray of food that was covered she handed it Alex who smiled and thanked her. Then she left and closed the door behind her. He took the cover off the food walked over to Chris once again. "I know you aren't supposed have dessert first but, I think we will try the cookie first." He said and picked up the cookie from the tray and offered it to Chris.

 

[TheSpaceInBetween]

Chris was a little relieved when Alex moved away from him, he never liked being to close to somebody. Although if Chris really thought about it this was the first time that he had been in a room with someone this long who hadn't hurt him. It was so strange.


He looked at the blanket once more, he ran his fingers over it softly. It was very soft. He could still hear Alex talking to him even though he didn't really understand what he was saying. He rubbed the blanket on his nose gently and grumbled a little, this was sort of nice. He jumped a little as a knock on the door startled him, he turned his body towards the wall as a person with long hair enter. Wait he knew what that person was...long hair? A woman! It was a woman.


She left soon after and Chris returned to feeling the blanket, sniffing it quickly it smelt really nice. He looked over to Alex as he again spoke saying someone else's name. That must have been the woman that came in.


Soon enough Chris's sense of smell was a little overwhelmed as Jenny brought in something on a tray. He craned his head and sniffed quickly, watching as Alex picked something up and held it out to him. What was it?


Chris craned his neck and sniffed quickly, he couldn't smell it much over the other food. He shuffled forward and tentatively reached forward, quickly taking away the round object. He brought it too his nose first sniffing it. Next he licked it a few times, it was sweet but not too sweet. He nibbled a little at the cookie and held it in his mouth as he assessed the texture. It took him a few minutes to nibble away and swallow the food but he enjoyed it. There was cookie crumbs all over his face and hands but he didn't mind.


Chris shuffled forward towards Alex he paused by the bed to look at the food, his mouth watered a little bit. He held his hand out grumbling a little wanting some more food, but he couldn't see the cookie that he just had. Everything looked very strange.