Realistic or Modern Anchored by Love (Draft Four... lol)

[Lexus]

Amelia ​

Watching Jayden almost break wasn’t easy. I didn’t know much about him and perhaps that’s why the reaction he gave was so telling for me. It meant I portrayed the story in the way I hoped. However, my satisfaction rapidly diminished when he turned his concern back to me and what I experienced. What I experienced, wasn’t the point. Biting my nails to fight my frustration, a nasty habit I tried countless times to break and failed. When I realized I was doing it, I stopped. Giving Jayden my best attempt at a casual expression, I shrugged.

“How long I stay depends on how long it takes me to find something better.”

Hearing Jayden’s phone vibrate, I caught a glance of what popped up on his screen out of unintentional curiosity and felt my stomach clench. I missed Isabel but I wasn’t going to admit it. Jayden didn’t need to know. When his questions continued, I listened, not surprised they were focused on me and my well being. I wasn’t sure if he was asking because he genuinely cared, or for Isabel, but again, I didn’t mind. Id she wanted to be the one to break the silence between us on her own, I wouldn’t object to it, but I was leaving the ball in her court for how I left her for Dawson to mend. I hoped it was able to pick up on the things she needed him to be. Even though we weren’t on speaking terms, I continued to pray for her in hopes it would put her mind at ease. But I was always worried that wasn’t enough.

Pretending not to see what I saw, I gained my train of thought again.

“I’m not sure what you mean by what it means for me. I just finish the last few stories I have left to do from there and then I move onto the next thing. I think I’m going to shoot for Africa next, if the AP wants to pay to send me there. But that’s always been a dream and there’s no better time then the present now that I have the reputation to back up my fieldwork. As for me personally, I’m fine, or at least trying to be, it’s a lot of readjusting that not very many people will understand and I don’t have anyone here so it’s taking longer than I anticipated. I got a dog because I can’t sleep at night, too afraid someone’s going to break in after being on high alert so long.

Shrugging my shoulders I continued.

“If you ever meet a journalist who can get out a dangerous city for months without getting injured, they’re lying to you, Americans especially If a rouge extremist gets a hold of one. Killing an American journalist for the sake of not exposing their beloved country’s corruption is like a golden trophy.”

In attempt to break up the dark turn this conversation took, I smiled, genuinely for the first time in awhile.

“But for now, it’s worth the risks because I love what I do. I always have and by the grace of God, always will. We’ll see.”

 

[isax]

Jayden​

Listening to Amelia tell me everything was a lot to take in. Especially when she told me about journalists always getting hurt, no matter where they went. I never took that into consideration. Never thought that journalists could get seriously hurt while out doing fieldwork. The thought never crossed my mind because they all said they were fine. They never once told anyone the truth and now the truth was setting in. Amelia was hurt. She faced so many things I could never imagine facing. She was strong, even more so because she wanted to go out again, to Africa this time. You could see the passion radiating off of her and as happy as I was for her, I felt my stomach turn at the thought of Isabel not being the same.

I didn't want Amelia to think I was only concerned about her because of Isabel. I genuinely still wanted to ensure she was safe, and cared about her despite how we ended talking. I wanted to tell her about Isabel though. I wanted to tell her she wasn't happy, if anything, she was regressing back to what she once felt, but I knew I couldn't. Isabel wasn't Amelia's responsibility anymore,

Clearing my throat, I formulated something to say, finding the words while setting my phone into my pocket.

"I can see that you love what you do. It radiates off you. Just, try and be safe, okay? I know we stopped talking in a pretty rocky way but I do still worry about your well being. If anything, consider me a friend who cares and just wants to make sure you're okay. I'm always just a phone call away, okay?"

I could bet Amelia didn't want to hear any of what I just said. It wasn't the best thing to say but it was the truth. I still had feelings for Amelia, but if they made her uncomfortable right now, I was going to push them aside. I just wanted her to know she could always count on me. I would drop anything if she needed my help.

I can never replace Isabel, but I can step in and help.

Fort Worth
Isabel​

When I finished eating breakfast at the ranch with Dawson, I gave him the usual goodbye kiss, grabbing my oversized purse before heading out the door saying an 'I love you' and 'Be safe'. Going to work was just something to keep me from my thoughts, and despite how many times I said I would never do studio photography, that's what I found myself doing after Amelia left. It was six months since then. Six months since I left the field I loved with all my heart, leaving the city I dreamed to live in, for something much more simple, something 'normal'.

Normal was never my thing, but I was working my damned hardest to make it be. I moved to Fort Worth to be closer to Dawson, my rock through all of this, and get a fresh start. After dropping the Blue Angel story, losing Olivia and Amelia, I was a wreck. I still am but at least now I didn't feel as suffocated as I once did. I couldn't be a journalist anymore. Not after I did something so unethical. I couldn't even fathom being in a newsroom. I knew the guilt would just eat me alive.

Does it really matter? It still does.

My 'normal' routine consisted of eating breakfast with Dawson at the ranch or alone in my apartment. I fed Apollo, my adorable little Maltipoo, then grabbed everything I would need for another day at the studio. Sitting at the front desk always seemed to bring me a sense of pride. I never thought it would but knowing I built it from the ground up pushed me to keep going.

As I arrived to my studio, I let out a deep sigh, parking in the spot designated for me in the back before walking in, opening it for the day. Today was going to be busy. My photographers and I were booked with appointments. Senior pictures, family photos, and corporate headshots. While they handled that, I handled the culling and sorting, then the editing and sending. It was just another day in my photographer life. It paid the bills and that's all that mattered.

Sitting at my glass desk, I opened my Google Chrome, staring at the home page for a few second before finally typing in a name. Amelia Carson. I clicked on her portfolio, scrolling through the first page to get to her most recent story from Guatemala. Looking at her photos brought me a sense of pride. I had been keeping up with it, not wanting to miss a single part, but now that it was entirely finished, I admired it for what it was as a whole.

After looking at her photos, I opened another tab, typing another name. My name. Clicking on the first site that came up, I went straight to my old portfolio, scrolling to the very end of all the stories I did, looking through all of them. I did this more often then y'all think. Every time I got in my head, I was always looking at what I used to do, how many lives I touched but gave it all up. With each scroll, more tears fell, and the only thing to bring me back to my normal reality was one of my photographers calling me.

"Be there in just a sec!" I called out to her, grabbing my phone and texting both Dawson and Jayden in our groupchat, asking if they were down to get dinner tonight. They would instantly know I needed company. Like I said, this happened a lot.

Walking to the back, I helped my photographer set up the background and get her settings on her Canon right before I went back to my desk and busied myself with culling and sorting while country music played throughout the entire studio. A little banner appeared on my screen to the side; An email from the Star Telegram. Sighing, I sent it straight to my trash box, not giving it a second thought. They had sent me several emails since I moved out here but I did the same thing every time. Ignore them.

I need a drink tonight.

 

[Lexus]

Amelia​

Smiling at Jayden's attempt to bridge our awkward gap I created, the giggle was inveitable. I needed it.

"Why do you care so much?" I asked curiously. "Did you miss me?" I teased knowing he probably didn't think about me once unless Isabel brought me up, but at this point, I doubt she ever did. I expected her to be fully moving on, never speaking about me again because she would learn in her grief, that the whole thing was stupid and discredit me for who I once was to her. I accepted that if it helped her move on.

"I appreciate your concern, but I'll be okay, Jayden." Standing, I gathered my trash from breakfast and collected my things from the table, sliding them all back in my bag. "I know you probably need to sleep, so I dont want to keep you, but it was nice talking to you, really. Thank you, and I'm sorry again for what I said before, I--I just really wanted the best for Isabel when it was my place to have a say. I never knew how to consider her faults because I saw all her good intentions." Shrugging my shoulders, I caught the lump in my throat, staring back at Jayden strongly.

"Have a good rest of your day," I said, making my way towards the door before i stopped in hesitation catching my breath before I turned to face the man in uniform again. "Jayden?" I asked, when he looked at me, I bit my lip, debating if I should just say something else and walk away, but I took the leap of faith.

"Can you tell her thank you for everything for me? She'll know what it means and also, if she's cooking tonight, you can't go wrong with asking for chicken and rice." Smiling faintly at his nod, I renturned it before I finally dashed outm not wanting him to stop me to suggest I go to Fort Worth because it wasn't happening.

 

[isax]

Isabel​

When Jayden requested Arroz con Pollo for dinner, I was a little intrigued. He never had the tendency to ask for Mexican food but lucky for him, I was craving it enough to make it. Agreeing that it would be made, I asked him to supply the alcohol. After work, I headed back to the ranch, letting myself in since Dawson was still at work. Making my way to the kitchen with bags full of ingredients needed for out dinner tonight, I set them on the table before making my way into the kitchen, setting my phone on the counter as I played country music to entertain me while I began prepping everything.

When the chicken was finished boiling, I smiled when I heard the front door open, accompanied by two voices. Hearing Jayden compliment the smell brought a smile to my face. My rice was always inconsistent but I was slowly getting it to perfection. When Dawson walked over and gave me a kiss, I kissed him back gently, pulling away to get started on the rice, the final step for this Mexican dish.

"Well how was work today you two?" I asked them, turning the music down on my phone so we could hold a decent conversation. I wasn't expecting Jayden to tell me what he did, but when he did, my heart skipped a beat and I forgot how to breathe for a couple of seconds.

"I saw Amelia today. She's back for a bit, until she can find something better than the AP. She asked me to tell you thank you for everything."

Composing myself was harder than expected. Turning off the stove, I took a deep breath, nodding in acknowledgment to what Jayden just said. Amelia was back in Dallas. She left Guatemala and I instantly knew why. She was looking to leave though, and I didn't want to intrude on anything she has planned for her life. I knew what Jayden meant with the message she asked him to relay and biting back the tears wasn't easy.

"Excuse me for a sec," Walking to Dawson's room, I sat on the bed, staring through the massive floor to ceiling window that showed every beautiful aspect of the ranch. It was my favorite place to be whenever I just needed to be in my head for a bit.

I wanted to text Amelia. I wanted to tell her that I was proud of her, proud of the work she accomplished. I knew the minute I watched the video this was her way in to doing what she always wanted. I didn't know where she would go next, but I could only assume it would be Africa. That was her dream and despite how things ended, I was happy for her. It took a lot for me to pull out my phone, opening my text messaging app, typing her name in to find our old thread that hadn't been touched in six months. I needed to end this. I needed her to know I was happy for her. She didn't need to know what I was up to, but I did want to tell her what I couldn't before.

"Hi Amelia, Jayden relayed your message. Now I see why he requested arroz con pollo for dinner. I just wanted to say that I am so fucking proud of you and the story your produced from Guatemala. I can't even fathom what you went through but you told the story just like I knew you would. I heard you're looking for something better. I hope you get it. I just know you're itching to go out to Africa. Keep doing what you're doing. You're kicking ass. I love you and I'm sorry about everything. I don't ever expect you to forgive me but I just needed you to know I will always be your biggest fan. Keep killing it."

Taking a deep breath, I read over the text message, biting my lip as my thumb hovered over the blue send button. I hit it, sending the message to her. I didn't regret it. I wanted her to know what I felt but I never expected her to be in my life again after I screwed up so badly. Setting the phone down against the bed, I stared out at the view, admiring the view before I heard Dawson knock on the door. Looking over at him, I smiled weakly, tears instantly falling the minute he walked closer. He was my confidant, the one who saw me in my most vulnerable state, and right now I just needed a good cry before I attempted to make dinner.

"I texted her," I whispered weakly, wiping away the tears as they fell with the back of my hands, moving into Dawson's chest when he pulled me into an embrace. "I'm so proud of her, ya know. It sucks not being able to go through this with her but it's my fault. She's doing what she always wanted to do and I can only hope she kicks ass for the both of us."

I always knew she would be the one to make it.

 

[Lexus]

Dawson​

Over the last six months, watching Isabel continue with the new life she was trying to build was hard to watch. I knew despite the façade, she was still severely depressed and unhappy and that was evident behind closed doors. As her significant other, I never fathomed when I was falling in love with her I would have to get comfortable with holding her while she cried herself into undisputed exhaustion, have to pull her out of bed on days she didn’t want to move, or force her to eat when it got that bad. But loving her, I knew I couldn’t give up on her.

Losing the one person before me who knew her like the back of their hand, was devastating I realized. I felt partly at fault, considering how the events unraveled. I was the center of it all and I never got the chance to defend myself to Amelia. I wanted her to know I never wanted to intentionally sabotage Isabel and her career, but love is a hard feeling to deter. I did my best and it wasn’t enough and because of that, Isabel lost her anchor.

As months passed, her bad days were getting better but they still remained a frequent part of our life together. I did the best I could to help in any way Isabel would let me and over time, she let me into her vulnerability bubble more often, it was a double edged sword. While I wanted her to let me in to help, I had to hold back my own emotions seeing her so low. It was never easy.

After Both Jayden and I agreed to meet her back at my house for supper, I wasn’t expecting Jayden to bring the night crashing down with one sentence, one word really, Amelia. He didn’t warn me before we entered he was going to mention this, so when he did, I glared in his direction as I watched Isabel retreat to the room.

“You idiot, you should know better,” I replied in a stern whisper before I quickly apologized not wanting Jayden to run off. We still needed to have this dinner for Isabel’s sake, after she took a few minutes to compose herself from the wound Jayden just slashed open again.

“Sit,” I said more friendly this time, “I’ll be right back with her okay?”

Running up to my room, I knocked on the door gently, not wanting to startle Isabel, as I assumed she was crying, considering how fast she vacated the kitchen. I also knew better than to ask if she was alright, because I knew better than that. Slowly making my way towards her, I took the strongest woman I knew into my arms and let her cry against me.

“You can’t keep blaming yourself, Amor. Everyone makes mistakes and I;m not sure you can call what happened between us a mistake, I don’t regret anything.” Kissing her forehead I rook her hands in mine and rubbed my fingers across one hand to comfort her.

“The ones we love hurt us the most because we love them so much, Maybe you both just need the time and one day, you’ll make amends, Don’t be so hard on yourself for finding happiness. You deserve it. I love ya.”

 

[isax]

Isabel​

I knew Dawson was right but I didn't want to hear it. Quite frankly, I grew tired of him constantly telling me I couldn't blame myself. I always did and he knew that. It's why me being this way, facing this low, was so hard for him. He was never supposed to see me like this but after a month of hiding it from him, I couldn't keep doing it. It got so exhausting and if anyone could see me like this, it was him, my cowboy.

Sighing, I tried collecting myself, my cries turning into sniffles as I took a deep breath. Slowly pulling away from Dawson's chest, I smiled at him weakly, nodding so he knew I understood while I found the words to say.

"I know you're right. You would think after six months it wouldn't hurt as much as it did then but that's foolish of me. It hurts a fuck ton knowing I may never have her back in my life," I bit my lip, trying to gain my composure again. "I love you too. Sorry for running out. I feel bad for leaving Jayden alone. We should go back. I'll finish dinner."

Giving Dawson a gentle kiss, I composed myself just as fast as I unraveled in the comfort of his room. Going to the bathroom, I stared at myself in the mirror, thinking about what the love of my life said. He mentioned I was being hard on myself because I was finding happiness, but was that really true?

No. You're not happy, Anes. You're in hell but you just hide it so well from everyone. Does he really think the stupid studio I built, taking pictures of weddings and other events actually makes you happy? It doesn't. It's just an excuse to keep a camera wrapped around your wrist.

I missed the news scene more and more with everyday that passed, but I could never go back. My days as a journalist were over.

Releasing a deep sigh, I managed to compose myself, walking back out to the living with Dawson and Jayden, smiling at them as if I didn't just break down minutes ago.

"Alright. Let's finish that arroz con pollo. Jayden, did you bring the Gentleman Jack? I need a glass."

Jayden​

I should have know just Amelia's name alone would trigger Isabel and cause her to spiral, but I was so overjoyed from seeing the one woman to make me lose my breath that her name just came tumbling out. I knew Isabel wasn't going to be ready to hear it and I felt horrible when she quickly left the kitchen to do the only thing she ever did now and days: cry.

I sat down when Dawson told me to, biting my lip as the minutes seemed to go by like hours. I should have told Amelia to check in on Isabel before she left the cafe, but that wasn't her job anymore and I knew with how fast she left, she didn't want to hear me say it. I respected that but just wished the two would resolve what happened. They both weren't the same. They needed each other.

Smiling at the photographer when she came back down, I laughed at her question, nodding as I stood up and went to the kitchen, grabbing the bottle of whiskey out from the Spec's bag.

"Yes ma'am I sure did. I'll pour you some right now. Want a glass, Covington?"

 

[Lexus]

Dawson ​

Breathing a sigh of relief when Isabel left the bedroom and returned out to the kitchen, I nodded towards Jayden to let him know she was okay, at least for now. Pulling the plates and the silverwear out, I set the table the same way I had been since my Momma taught me at five. Looking up at Jayden, I shook my head at his offer.

"That's alright," I replied, full knowing this night could take a turn for the worst as soon as Jayden left for the night, meaning, Isabel would cradle that whole bottle Jayden just bought her, lost so deep in her thoughts that I could hardly pull her out of. I needed to be coherent for that.

"Let's eat."

A Week Later...
Amelia ​

I must have read the text Isabel sent me 1000 times in the past week, I stared at it every morning when I woke up and every night before I went to bed, debating the right way to reply, but nothing ever came to mind. I didn't know what to say. I didn't expect Jayden to actually relay the message I asked him to, and I sure as hell didn't expect Isabel to text me because of it. It weighed heavy on my mind and still was. a week later. Now that it was cooler out, I was able to take Roo out for afternoon walks. After her last heartwork treatment she was on the up and overall, a happy dog. Today, of course, I strolled with her to the usual cafe and sat with her outside, sipping my gingerbread latte, while she laid at my feet, keeping her head perked up, watching all the passerbys. It wasn't until I felt her life herself up and wiggle in excitement that I looked up from the news I was reading. Jayden approached her and Roo eagerly let him pet her.

"Her name is Roo," I said gently, looking up at him as out gazes met. "You always seem to find me here, it's like you know my schedule. Are you stalking me?" I asked questionably raising my eyebrows playfully, reaching for the overly-spiced latte to sip it. It was already paid for and I didn't want to waste it.

 

[isax]

Jayden​

Working nights was always something I enjoyed. They were the most action packed times and I was all about the action. It meant I was never bored, unless it was a slow night, like Monday nights, but the routine I put myself in now was essentially going to work at night and then went to the cafe. Today was different, however. I actually had the day off and when I walked up to the cafe, I smiled when I saw the most precious pup sitting at an outside table with their owner before it saw me and got excited. Walking closer, I pet her happily before looking up when I heard Amelia's voice, smiling at her softly when she told me the puppy's name.

"Roo huh? Pretty name." I said softly, standing up after petting the puppy, chuckling at what I heard Amelia say. "I would never stalk you. We've just been going to the same cafe for what? About two years now?"

Walking to the other chair across from Amelia, I pointed at it. "May I?" I asked, sitting down when she let me. I didn't even go into the cafe for my usual black coffee. Right now, I just wanted to talk with Amelia. I had a reason and it wasn't because I found her attractive. No, this had to do with Isabel. The night we all had dinner, I watched her go from the happiest woman alive to slowly crumbing and spiraling. After about three glasses of whiskey, she let herself get comfortable enough to become vulnerable and I got a glimpse into what Dawson dealt with every night. I felt horrible for adding to it by bringing Amelia up.

Biting my lip, I took a deep breath before I looked at her and smiled gently.

"Amelia, I need to tell you something. I know Isabel texted you last week when we last saw each other. I also know you never responded and I don't blame you. What I saw later that night was Isabel hugging a bottle of whiskey, crying to Dawson about how much she fucked up. I never want to see it again but we both know why she's putting on this facade of happiness for everyone. She's not happy, Amelia. She misses you every single day and I know you and her ended on bad terms but I'm asking you, as her friend and yours, to go see her. At least stop in and say hi."

I knew Isabel didn't want Amelia to know what she was doing now, considering she was no longer a journalist but I knew Amelia needed to know. Amelia was the only one that could get her to go back to doing what she loved.

"She owns a studio in Fort Worth located downtown. I have her business card with the address. I'm sure she would be more than thrilled to see you show up. Just please, consider it."

 

[Lexus]

Amelia​

Nodding at Jayden’s request to sit, I pulled Roo closer towards me so she wouldn’t wander, smiling when she laid back down, her head on her paws, I gave Jayden my attention again, but at the mention of Isabel, I was less excited to see him. This is not what I wanted our visits to turn into. I wanted to stay out of his friend circle with Isabel and Dawson. I didn’t want to get drawn back into it, too afraid things would go south again if Dawson and I butted heads. I didn’t feel it was my place to “fix” Isabel anymore.

I wasn’t surprised though, what Jayden told me was going on with her, that was normal for Isabel, it’s how she handed her emotions. What made my thoughts collapse in disappointment is what Jayden said about the studio.

You’re better than that, Isabel. Why?

Gathering my thoughts I sighed heavily, shaking my head. Jayden confronting me triggered a part of my thoughts I preferred to keep to myself. But I knew if I wasn’t completely honest with Jayden, he would get angry with me again, and I wanted to avoid that because he was the only “friend” I had here.

“Jayden, I can’t help, I wish I could, but I can’t. I know she’s hurting and she doesn’t deserve it, but if she’s already decided she’s a fuckup to me, then she’ll continue to think that. If I was able to make amends, she would still never let go of the one time she lost me. She’ll never fogive herself for it; because she doesn’t want to. When I face her, she’ll continue to push me away, and that’s what hurts the most.” Taking another deep breath, I decided to delve into the darkest part of my thoughts.

“At least she has Dawson to help her through this, she doesn’t realize it, but she’s lucky to have him. I’m glad she has the both of you to be concerned for her, she needs that or she’ll continue to get worse, as long as you stay, she’ll work through it, slowly. Me? Since we drifted no one has bothered to ask me how I am, they think that because I instantly got up and left, I’m okay when that has to be the farthest thing from the truth. Yes, I was the one to “walk out” and you weren’t wrong, they’re adults, but if you know anything about what out dynamic used to be, for her to keep me in the dark about such a big portion of her life, was so devasting to me. It wasn’t that she fell for Dawson, it’s that she didn’t tell me. I left because my work is the only thing that would calm me down. I’m important to her, but she’ll alwaysbe more important to me."

"She’s all I had, Jayden. The one person who understood every part of me and never criticized even the worst parts when I wished they didn’t exist. Isabel was the first person to show me true uncontional love and I know that sounds cheesey and we all go through our own things, but before she came into my life, I went through things I would never wish upon anyone and eventually it all built up, until I just wanted to give up, I thought it would be better to end my own life than try to work through it. Then I met Isabel. The one person to love and encourage me through everything when everyone else, even my own family, continued to try to break me down. On top of that, because I wasn’t in proximity of her for most of our friendship, people who continued to walk in and out of her life, never respected me for my place in her life over something neither one of us could control. So when I was able to control it, I moved out here on the first chance I got to be closer and be “legit.” The only time I mattered to any of them was when they needed me to fix what they broke of her. I did it every time because I knew I was the only one who would, who knew how and the second she was “fixed” I just handed her right back to them, like they deserved her when most of the time, they didn’t. I’m not saying you don’t, I don’t know, I haven’t been around, but I’m not fixing her for you. If I’m going to be a part of Isabel’s life again, I’m not just going to be a fixer. I’m sorry if that upsets you. She let Dawson in, I can't say that letting another person in is in the cards for me."

Catching the trail of tears that fell with my finger, I reached for a napkin on the table to quickly recompose myself. I didn't want Jayden to see me like this, but it was too late.

 

[isax]

Jayden​

The last thing I expected Amelia to do was open up to me, letting me into her thoughts and how she felt about the entire situation between her and Isabel. I instantly felt horrible for pushing the idea of "fixing" Isabel on her. that wasn't what I meant. All I wanted was for the two to talk it out, hoping they could work it out for both their sakes, but I guess I didn't use the correct words. I instantly felt horrible for not even considering how Amelia felt through all of this so when she told me everything, I wanted to be able to help her and be there for her through this since Isabel had Dawson.

Taking in a small breath, I nodded softly at Amelia before I took her hands in mine, smiling at her weakly so she knew I didn't think anything she just told me was selfish. It wasn't. Everything she felt was valid, just like what Isabel felt was also valid, but I wanted Amelia to work on herself before the two of them tried being what they once one were.

"Amelia, why would I ever be upset with you?" pulling my hands away from hers, I sighed softly, "How you feel about this is just as important as Isabel and I'm sorry I didn't ask you how this affected you. I want you to know that I don't expect you to do anything. I want you to take some time to yourself. If you'll let me, I'm willing to be there for you every step of the way. I want you to know that. I wasn't expecting you to open up to me, but I'm glad that you did. I want to make sure that you're okay. I know you left to throw yourself into your work but now that you're back, I don't want you to feel like you're alone, because you're not. You need to find your own happiness."

 

[Lexus]

Amelia​

“No, it’s okay, I wasn’t asking you to step in, I’m sorry, it just kind of, fell out.” Shrugging my shoulders, I tried to laugh it off but my eyes were already burning from the cry that slipped right past me.

“I appericate what you’re trying to do for me, but I can handle it, I promise. I don’t want to come between you and your friends, it would be hypocritical of me, actually. I don’t want to put you in the middle of all this. Thank you though.”

Lindsey​

“For the love of God, Amelia, will you let the man take you out? You have got to be the most the oblivious and hard headed person I have ever met. It’s been two years, Jayden cares about you, and he’s trying to be patient, but you have to cut the man a break,” I said, cutting into their conversation, bringing Jayden his usual since I saw him sitting out here with Amelia and it was slow inside

Over the last two years, I watched these two beat around the bush of their obvious attraction for each other. Over time, before they met, Jayden’s corky notes always gave a laugh to Amelia, even when I knew she didn’t go home the night before. For Jayden, after working testing night shifts, Amelia’s notes brought a smile to his face, even when he faced the most traumatic scenes. Through their words, they had alays been there for each other, even if the other didn’t realize. They had a different kind of connection, one that ran deeper than an intail physical attraction.

Both times the notes stopped. I watched Jayden slip into a diasppontment because of it, he tried to hide it, but his excitement seemed to dim. On rough days, I watched him take his usual table in the corner when he had the time to loiter, and pull out a book from his pant pockets, skimming through the pages, I watched him crack a smile and occasionally chuckle. I only could assume he kept the notes for safe keeping.

Whenever he saw her, he watched her from a distance, nervous to approach her every time. It was both humorous and sweet to watch a grown man who caught criminals for a living to fumble with his hands and knaw on his lip for minutes before he caught the courage to approach her, and ever time, she turned him down, his hopeful eyes soon dimmed again.

After hearing Amelia deny him yet again after crying in front of him, I knew I had to step in, I hoped fate would, but it looked like I had to give it a push.

“You honestly think this smart guy comes here every day to pay for your four dollar latte out of the kindess of his heart? He doesn’t do it for anyone else.” Shrugging my shoulders, setting the mug in front of Jayden, I rubbed my hands against my apron. “I think he’s earned it.”

 

[isax]

Jayden​

Hearing Lindsey flat out ask Amelia if she would let me take her out was something I never expected to happen. The barista threw me off guard, blinking as I tried to fathom what just occurred. I couldn't laugh like I wanted to, since it was a coping mechanism of mine, just like Amelia. Looking over at the journalist curiously, I smiled sheepishly before turning to look back at the barista.

"Thanks for the coffee, Linds." I said softly before reaching towards the cup and taking a heavily needed sip. Enjoying the strong bitter flavor from the straight black coffee, I calmed my nervous before looking at Amelia again with another small smile.

"So, what do ya say? I promise you won't be disappointed. In fact, you just might enjoy yourself." I said softly, chuckling when Amelia shook her head from the entire situation.

I had to admit, if Lindsey hadn't come over and said what she did, I don't think Amelia and I would ever have gone on a date. Technically Amelia hadn't said yes yet, but I knew Lindsey wasn't going to leave until she got what she had been wanting for awhile now. To be exact, since Amelia and I started passing notes.

"C'mon. Think of it as me helping you be happy again. You deserve it."

 

[Lexus]

Amelia​

I didn't know what to say. Up until now, whatever feelings I thought Jayden had for me when I panicked and stop the notes the first time were completely made up in my own head. Now that Lindsey confirmed what I naively inferred from the tone in his notes but never dared to confront him about, I was at a loss. I didn't know how to handle it, especially now given the relationship Isabel and Dawson had. If Jayden ended up waiting us to get serious, what would that mean? I couldn't isolate myself from Isabel and Dawson forever and I wouldn't make him choose. That was childish. I wasn't sure it was the best idea, it would just add another twist in the over-complicated dynamic. I tried to calm myself down by thinking, maybe, Lindsey was too far off in her assumption about Jayden having an eye on me for more reasons than just being a friend like he was pushing, but when he didn't deny it while she awaited my reply, and then, asked himself, I remained speechless.

Is this really happening? Why me?

Shrugging, I sighed, I wanted to defend my previous claim about him being friends with Isabel and Dawson and not wanting to intrude, but the look in his eye, his sparlking blue eyes, I caught my breath, taking a sip of my latte to sum up the courage to continue the conversation. Out of my own timidness I twirled a stray hair back behind my ear, laughing subtly to myself in disbelief this was real.

It's one date, Amelia, it might not lead to anything, if it happens, you'll cross that bridge when you het to it.

"Okay, but only if you admit this was part of your plan the whole time," I teased, as usual, this time with a cocky wink. Setting the cup back down I smiled as I watched him comprehend what I just said, knowing after two years of playful banter, he expected me to say no, but this time, I finally relented.

"When?" I asked next, curious as to how he was going to think on his feet now that he got his way.

 

[isax]

Jayden​

She said yes. Oh shit.

I never once expected in my life that Amelia Carson, world known journalist and most stunning woman I've ever seen, would agree to go on a date we me, a mere police officer for Dallas. Amelia was so out of my league that actually getting to date her was always something I didn't think would happen, but now that she said yes, I couldn't hold back the wide smile that came across my face. I had to start planning on where I was actually going to take the beautiful woman because she deserved so much more than a basic dinner date.

"How does Saturday sound?" I asked her, my smile not fading. I felt like I was on cloud nine. "I'm not going to tell you much about what the date is but dress comfortably. It'll be fun, I promise."

When Amelia agreed, I looked over to Lindsey with a smile, thanking her for the push. I don't think without it Amelia would have said yes. When the barista walked back into the cafe content knowing Amelia and I were going on a date, I looked back at the beautiful woman across from me with a smile before I sipped on my coffee some more.

"What are you doing for the rest of the day?" I asked, not wanting her to leave anytime soon. I was exhausted but she was worth my time and so much more.

 

[Lexus]

Amelia​

"Saturday is fine, but I don't like surprises when I'm the one receiving them," I warned, seeing his demeanor completely change, His shoulders fell back to their natural position and not hunched forward to display his dominance. I knew being an officer, this became his generic display to people he didn't know too well, always on alert, but now that he could trust me, the ease carried through when his personality began to break through. Roo sensed it too, the second Jayden seemed to be himself, she perked herself up, barking playfully at him, sneakily inching towards him until she was able to fit her head in his lap for him to pet her.

"Roo, knock it off!" I replied sternly snapping my fingers for her to come back to me. I knew she was harmless and Jayden didn't seem to mind, but she was still a puppy and I was still training her how to behave out in public. She she lifted her head to look back at me, I held the stern expression that carried in my voice and signed in ASL for her to sit. When she complied, I smiled in satisfaction, loosening the grip on the leash.

"Sorry, I'm still trying to teach her not everyone wants to be bombarded by her cuteness like I do. We still have a lot to learn. She's been through a lot so she gets excited by people when they give her attention now that she knows not to be afraid of them after being in the puppy mill. She never got to be a puppy I don't think so she tries to act like one now."

Watching Roo wait for Jayden to invite her for attention, I shrugged at his asking what I was doing.

"I didn't have much of a plan today, I would be working but they put me on a leave." I wasn't going to say much else about it to Jayden,but my editor thought it would be best after watching me struggle to readjust to take some time to myself and seek professional help. It was valid, the gruesomeness and despair was going to take it''s toll, but often times, I never really addressed it, because I knew with time, I would move on, this was a completely different monster to eradicate from my mind.

At first, it was difficult to accept the intervention of a professional because coming from the family I did, I always tried to repress negative things, not wanting to burden others, but seeing what I saw, I couldn't let go of it without confiding in someone. So, I relented and went to therapy sessions twice a week, kept a journal, did my best to stay away from not spending too much time on the last of my Guatemala assignments when they sent me into a spiral. I was told it was post dramatic stress, but I didn't like to admit that because I didn't think it was valid for me to be that affected by what I voluntarily set myself into, but with time, and a lot of free writes, it was easier to move on.

"I'm assuming you’re off tonight since you’re not in that flashy uniform, and I can also assume that because you came looking for me, whether you want to admit it or not, you haven't had lunch yet. Any suggestions? I haven't been out in awhile, I mostly just eat at home. We can drop Roo off too, if that's easier, I'm not too far from here."

 

[isax]

Jayden​

When Roo put her head on my lap, I couldn't help but laugh softly at the playful pup, reaching under the table to pet her playful like she asked for. When Amelia called out to her though, I watched the two interact closely, taking note that Amelia knew sign language considering she signed to Roo. I wasn't sure what it meant at first but once the pup sat down, I knew it meant sit.

"She's such a sweet dog, I'm sure she'll pick up what you're teaching her pretty soon," I said softly to Amelia, smiling at Roo to give the attention she was seeking when she heard Amelia talking about her.

Smiling, I nodded when Amelia assumed I was off tonight. I was more than thrilled to be off tonight. I was going to need the sleep after spending the entire day with Amelia right after a shift. I dressed out of uniform back at the station because I knew I was going to find her here. I was more than excited to spend the day with her.

"Your assumption is correct I am off tonight so lunch sounds wonderful because I'm starving. We can keep Roo with us. I know a place that's dog-friendly, a friend of mine owns it. We can sit outside on the patio since it's nice out today." Smiling, at Amelia, I stood up, walking over to her and extending my hand, helping her up when she took it.

When we arrived at the restaurant, I smiled contently, my mouth watering at the thought about ordering the usual chicken fried chicken. My buddy, John, owns the place and the menu consisted of nothing but southern style food. Some of the best if you ask me.

Pulling out Amelia chair once we were on the patio, I pushed her closer to the table before going to sit across from her, smiling when Roo stretched herself out between the both of us under the table. Opening the menu, I smiled at the beautiful woman softly.

"This place has the best southern style food that I'm sure you'll enjoy. I'm not sure what you like eating most, but I can say the chicken fried chicken is amazing. The drinks here are also great. Try the Sangria. You won't regret it."

 

[Lexus]

Amelia​

I could tell Jayden was trying hard to impress me. I wasn't sure if he was aware of what he was doing or if being this smooth was a part of his personality, but it was refreshing for my strongly independent one. The little things he did like take my hand or pull out the chair were foreign to me, I was so accustomed to doing them for myself, I had to stop myself from interfering with his gesture when I realized what he was doing. I didn't want him to mistake it for me being rude. Thanking him both times, nodded at his eager suggestions for lunch.

"I'll go with both of your suggestions then, I have to learn to start trusting you somehow, and food is a big one for me," I said in an unintentional laugh. Looking down into my lap when Jayden ordered for the both of us, I looked back up at him with a grin, not sure what to say, but I took a shot at it. The fact that he was friends with Dawson, in my head, changed the dynamic we built over those stupid notes that lead to this point.

Say something.

Pulling on my earlobe, I played with my pearl earring out of nervousness. I wasn't expecting this conversation today.

"Do you come here a lot?" I asked curiously, not sure how else to start a casual conversation. Before now I never even heard of this place and so far, It seemed nice, but the food would tell me if it was really worth anything.

"I'm kind of scared honestly, because your version of good southern food and mine are more than likely a huge difference, since you northerners don't like to season your food," I teased, not sure if it was crossing a line, but I remembered him mentioning he was from Chicago in one of the notes when I made a joke about my blood being too thin for the Dallas winter as much as I wanted to love it.


OOC: Don't @ me if you're a northerner, in conversation Isabel here said, "Jayden is the type to only put salt on his food." So I had to make the joke, okay? Much love.

 

[isax]

Jayden​

“I do come here a lot, yeah. It’s the best place around her honestly. Dawson and I usually come and grab a beer here every so often.” I didn’t know if bringing up Dawson would rub Amelia the wrong way but he was my best friend and he was going to come up in conversations at times. I just didn’t want Amelia to be uncomfortable.

I couldn’t help but laugh at what the journalist said about my tastes in southern food. I knew the joke about northerners like me using nothing but salt to season my food was a typical assumption, but my parents taught me how to use so much more than that. What Amelia didn’t know is that my mother is from the south. She moved up north because she go tired of it here and that’s when she met my dad. I knew what it meant to have real southern cooking and this was the only spot that ever compared to hers.

“I’ll have you know, I’m not as much of a northerner like you think I am. Trust me. I make amazing food and use more than just salt. You’ll just have to try my cooking sometime,” Winking I smiled at her before taking a sip of my water, letting out a content sigh. Being here with Amelia was a lot more comforting than I thought it was going to be.

“How’s that sangria? It’s made with white wine instead of red here.”

 

[Lexus]

Amelia​

"Okay, how are you going to sit here and brag about your supposed southern roots, tell me you can cook, but bring me here?" I challenged in a playful arched brow, sipping the sweet sangria pleasantly.

"It's nice, I like it. So I guess this place is starting off on a good note, for now. I'm not sure if a hybrid is any better than a northerner. I guess it depends which parent is from where. But'll give you a shot, you earned it."

Laughing at my own joke again, I sighed contently after taking another sip of my wine. I felt myself getting too comfortable with Jayden, but it was already too late to retract. Being here with him, kept my thoughts from racing. It was nice. Catching him grinning nervously threw me into another fit of laughter, shaking my head and nearly choking.

"Relax Jayden, I'm not going to bite you, I promise. Ask me anything. I know you've been waiting, now's your chance."

 

[isax]

Jayden​

"So I'm a hybrid? Even if I were to tell you my mother is the southern one out of her and my dad?" I asked her curiously, laughing softly at the fact that she called me a hybrid. I had never heard someone refer to me as such before, but it was amusing coming from the true southern woman Amelia was.

When she began laughing yet again, I was puzzled, not entirely sure why she was. I hadn't said anything, just carried that stupid nervous grin on my face.

That could be why she laughed. Relax, Jay. Damn.

That was exactly why Amelia was laughing, because I was so nervous she picked up on it. I'm normally never like this but Amelia was different than any other woman I tried to date. Amelia was strong headed, independent, and honestly, didn't need me like I needed her. It was a chase I was willing to take and I looked forward to it.

"Alright you caught me. I'm kinda nervous," I laughed off the statement before taking a sip of my water, "But alright, let's start. I've heard you're from Florida. I find that interesting, honestly. Not many Floridians make their way here. Why did you choose journalism for your career? You never really wanted to delve into that question when we were only passing notes so c'mon, fill me in. I'm curious."

Fort Worth, Texas
Isabel​

On a day like today, when my mental health was on the upside, I tried to avoid going into my studio. I love what I do, don't get me wrong, but it's mainly because I get to keep a camera near by and still get use out of it, not because I actually liked the type of photography I was doing now and days. I still had to run into the studio though because today they were supposed to be culling and printing out photos that needed to be mailed. It was chaotic on these days, just like deadline days in a newsroom. That's what print and shipping days were like in my studio.

I didn't meet Dawson at the ranch for breakfast this morning, only because I wanted to help my employees as quick as I could before I left the studio for the remainder of the day. I didn't want to drown myself in the work and put myself in yet another sour mood. Good days were so rare for me now and days and I wanted to cherish them whenever I got the chance.

Arriving to the studio, I walked in, my block heels click-clacking against the tile floors as I made my way to the sorting room. Smiling at the employees that were already clocked in, I helped them get the orders out as quickly as possible, not paying much attention to the time. I was full work mode until I heard the front door open, assuming it was one of the appointments we had today showing up early.

Walking out of the sorting room and to the main area, I was looking at all the orders in my hands, focused on that rather than the person waiting to be acknowledged.

"Welcome to Anes photography. I'll be with you in just a sec."

When I heard Dawson's voice, I looked up from the papers in my hands rather intrigued, showing the curiosity in my expression. He hardly ever step foot in here and that was probably because it made him feel horrible. He blamed himself more than I did for what happened six months ago, but we both agreed falling in love with each other wasn't the mistake.

"Whatcha doin' here, Six? You should be on base." I said softly, setting the papers down on my desk before I leaned against it with my arms on either side of me. "Did you need something? You should've just texted me."

 

[Lexus]

OOC: I read Jayden's thought in Izzzy's sassy ass tone and I wish y'all understood why I am laughing so hard. Lmfao. One day she'll change her name to Isa. But it really is funnier in her voice.

Amelia​

I was hoping Jayden would stray away from the usual set of questions about me but when he didn't I just shrugged. I decided to be completely upfront. "Well, if we're being honest, not many Floridians find themselves becoming best friends with a Texan, things just happened that way. I don't regret it either, and I hate to bring Isabel into everything, it makes it seem like I'm still upset when I promise I'm not. As I said before, she was all I had for a long time, so she's the one who pushed me to pursue this," Stopping myself, I picked up the wine glass again, biting my lip in contemplation.

He's probably already heard this story. Cut it short for his sanity.

"To make a long story short, I always knew I wanted to be a journalist, it was never really a choice if that makes sense. You'll have to forgive me, I'm a sentimental person, but It's part of my destiny, and Isabel was the only one who saw that, ever, even now. Without her, I would be sitting in a law office, miserable somewhere, probably in Florida. When everyone else told me to let go of it because my potential was so much more, Isabel stood her ground and didn't let me let my one dream go. It scared the shit of me at times, but she stood her ground." Giggling at the thought, I was comforted by the memory I once hated. "I don't know how much she's told you, but that's why I moved here, to eventually work with her, but I just..." Struggling to articulate my thought on why I hadn't left yet, I looked up at Jayden confidently. "I guess I just haven't found it in my heart to leave yet."

I knew when I officially moved from Dallas, from Texas, that would be the ending to my chapter with Isabel. I wasn't ready to let go of that yet, as much as I knew there wasn't a chance we would be friends again, the thought of still being here reassured me in some strange way I couldn't express.

"What about you? You never said why did you choose policing?"

Dawson​

Usually, I spent the mornings with Isabel. W had been together long enough now that she caught on to my early rising habit and began to take after it. When she stayed the night at the ranch rather than alone in her apartment that I hated, she usually came along on my morning runs and then we made breakfast before parting our ways for work. However, today, because we didn't get the morning, I decided to make it up to her by taking her to lunch.

Wanting to surprise her, I didn't warn her that I was coming to the studio, rather, I just showed up.

When I walked inside and was greeted with the standard greeting, I smirked in her direction and waited for Isabel to notice who it was. When she didn't look up I inched closer.

"I really think you could have done better with that name, hun," I teased, putting my hands in my pockets, I bridged the gap between us. "Are you embarrassed that I'm here? I can call next time if you want, but I came to surprise you for lunch. Are you ready or should I wait over there?" I asked pointing to the chair, smiling at one of the employees who seemed to have her eyes stuck to me, it happened when I was in uniform. Walking over, I sat down in my the chair holding my hand out to her. "Hi there, I'm Dawson. You think you could redo my headshot for this badge? I don't really like it that much," I teased again unclipping it from my shirt to show her. When the young girl inched closer to look, I whispered mischievously, "This is why she doesn't let me come here without warning."

 

[isax]

OOC:Y'all, Dawson really wants to die right now.

Jayden​

I found it very sentimental that Isabel and Amelia were such significant aspects of each others lives. I knew part of Amelia's journey to becoming a journalist because Isabel mentioned it but now it all made sense in my head because Amelia finally gave me her side. It wasn't that different from Isabel's. Isabel had mentioned Amelia going through a lot to be where she was now but she never gave herself credit for it. Amelia did just that and I found the sentiment to be touching.

When she mentioned not moving from Dallas just yet, I was intrigued. It hurt my heart to know the two hadn't resolved anything as of yet. Even more so knowing Amelia still had hope that she and Isabel would be friends again. She didn't have to tell me that directly. I could just pick up on it by the tone of her voice and reasoning she gave for not moving yet.

I want to help them but I still think it isn't time for them. Isabel texted Amelia. What happens now is up to them.

"That's a touching story for your journalistic background honestly. I will never understand yours and Isabel's story but I love it." Smiling when she asked the question everyone does, I released a sigh, thinking about what to tell her.

"Mm, my story for choosing to be a police officer isn't anything like yours. I always looked up to my uncle growing up, and he was an officer for Chicago PD. My first ride along was when I was twelve. I wasn't supposed to go but he was just covering traffic violations so the chief let it happen. That's when I really fell in love with it, honestly. Seeing him do his thing and getting to be there with him solidified that it was what I wanted to do. I just didn't decide to do it for Chicago PD."

Instead, I came to Texas because I'm a coward.

Isabel​

Moving my tongue to the front of my top teeth, I sucked in annoyance as I watched Dawson walk to the chair he pointed ate, shaking my head as he acknowledge Regina and she acknowledged him back. She was fascinated by the uniform, everyone always was. I did too but that didn't mean I enjoyed it when others did the same. Releasing a deep sigh, I looked at the pilot before pushing myself off the desk, going around it to grab my purse from the drawer, slamming it shut to get Dawson's and Regina's attention.

Clearing my throat, I stood up tall and smiled at the two of them now that they were focusing on me. When Regina stood as quickly as she could, I saw her back away a couple feet. I was content knowing she was no longer near Dawson and he couldn't acknowledge her.

"Let's go, Covington." I said, in a non-joking manner. I wad ready to leave this place for the remainder of the day and just get to enjoy a dinner with the man that loved to tease me. I didn't even wait for him before I started walking out. "I won't be back in today, Regina, but just be sure to finish the shipping orders by tomorrow and Alex already knows that he's in charge of the appointment's today."

With that, I pushed the glass door open, walking straight for the truck. Turning to look at Dawson, I waited for him to unlock the doors. When he didn't unlock them and just walked towards me, I shook my head again.

"I thought you wanted to get lunch together, not annoy me so much that I will resort to just going back to my apartment."

 

[Lexus]

OOC: Nah, Isabel just needs to lighten up.

Amelia​

"Chicago," I repeated in a knowing smile. I was finally able to remember where I heard Jayden's accent before. "I've been there once." I didn't tell him why, because that involved bringing up Isabel again, so I just kept it vague. "None of us knew where we were going through so I'm sure you know it much better than I do." Folding my napkin in my lap, I listened to Jayden tell his story about how he ended up who he was, these stories about people fascinated me. Giving him my full attention despite our lunch being placed in front of us, I marveled at what Jayden picked off the menu, resisting the urge to dig in to be polite.

"Well, I think you're selling yourself short on that story because it's equally as touching."

Cutting into the chicken, my mouth began to water at the thought of the first bite, my eyes, I was sure went wide when we took out the first bite together. "Okay, you won me over, you're just all around lucky today." Giving him a playful wink, I thanked the waitress when she brought Roo a bowl of water.

When the silence fell between us again, I did what I knew how to do best, ask questions. It annoyed some, but I learned most times, it sparked decent conversation.

"So, why did you decide against working in Chicago and come here? Is your mom here?"

Dawson​

When Isabel gave me the signal to leave, I was quick to obey. Mostly because I was hungry and my playful chastizing was me just trying to make her laugh. I learned over the past year some days it worked, other days, it set her off the wrong way, and by the sound of it when I reached for the keys to unlock her door, I was off on the wrong foot today.

Yikes.

Walking over towards her, I took her into a tight hug and kissed her head before I opened the door for her.

"No ma'am we're going to lunch. Where do you wanna go, Anes?" I asked, hurriedly making my way to the driver's side while she thought about it. Reaching for her hand, I held onto it, rubbing the top with my thumb while I enjoyed this moment of peace between us.

​

 

[isax]

Jayden​

Grinning, I was content knowing Amelia enjoyed the chicken fried chicken that I suggested, and overall this place. I would always love this restaurant because it was a small reminder of how my mother cooks. I missed the cooking but I wasn't entirely ready to step foot back in Chicago after what happened.

Heading Amelia ask the one question I wish she didn’t, I bit my lip, taking a bite of my food before I calmed my nerves enough to give Amelia the answer she was looking for.

“That’s a little complicated. I love Chicago with my entire heart, don't get me wrong, and as much as I wish my parents were here, they aren't. They're still in Chicago. I left after I graduated from high school and that mainly happened because my uncle gave up his life while on the clock. I was angry for a bit, throwing myself into my career to get over it. Living in Chicago and being in the same department as him wasn't good for my mental health so I left as far away as I could."

Shrugging my shoulders, I let out a soft and weak smile, not focusing too much on what I just said. To push it aside, I was quick to ask a question for Amelia.

"What's your family like? True die hard southerners?"

Isabel​

When Dawson took me into a tight hug and kissed my head, I released a deep sigh before I relaxed against him, trying not to let the annoyance I felt towards him fester. I didn't get to see him this morning and I didn't want to ruin lunch. We hadn't had time to spend together lately and that was mainly my fault. I was pulling away ever since Jayden mentioned seeing Amelia. I know Dawson hated it, and I know he hated that I had the apartment still, but when my thoughts consumed me enough, I usually went home to fester in them and let out a good cry alone. That's the main reason Dawson hated it.

"I really want wings." I said softly, getting into the truck after he opened the door for me then closed it once I was in. Leaning against the leather seat, I relaxed, putting my seatbelt on with a soft sigh before I looked over at the pilot when he opened his door and jumped in. Smiling at him softly, I looked back towards the road once we took off.

"I thought the commander was here today. How'd you manage to get off base for lunch? I'm not opposed to it. I've missed you," Smiling at the feeling of his hand holding mine, I gave it a squeeze. "I don't want to come back to work tomorrow if I'm being honest. I also don’t want to go to the Hatch meeting tomorrow."

I didn't actually want to go tomorrow. It was going to be the first time I stepped foot on my college campus after disgracing the journalistic community by being unethical. It didn't feel right going but I tried pushing those thoughts aside because I wanted to continue having a positive mindset today.

"Can I spend the night tonight?"

I don't want to be alone.

 

[Lexus]

Amelia​

Usually, when people open up to me about their tragedies, I can sense it, there's some type of warning, they avoid eye contact, their voice lowers, hands shake, but with Jayden there was nothing. Not having the time to prepare for what he told me, I felt my stomach clench. Being over-empathetic, I felt his heartbreak and suddenly, I could infer from his eyes alone he never recovered from that loss. By how quick he was to change the subject though, I didn't press it anymore, he didn't want to talk about it and my condolences, though they were out of respect were meaningless to Jayden, they wouldn't bring his uncle back and I was certain he received the fair share of empty apologies. If the time came, I would express my kind words when he wanted to hear them.

"For the most part we are diehards, yes, but there is one anomaly, my grandpa, he's from New York. He's lived in Florida and been married to my grandma long enough to be fully converted though. It's better that way, it doesn't help him a majority of my family is women. It makes for jokes when we're all together. They're all a bunch of characters, to say the least, but at the end of the day, I love them."

Dawson​

"Don't worry about where you think I'm supposed to be, I'm here with you and that's where I will always need to be first," I whispered, bringing her hands to my lips and kissing it gently, not letting go. Hearing the love of my life say she didn't want to do things when at one time, she jumped at every opportunity for her career, made my guilt swelter within me. Clearing my throat to push down the burning clot, I nodded at her question.

"Of course you can stay the night, amor, you can stay for forever when you're ready to. You don't have to ask. My door is always open to you and Apollo too, of course, even though he hates me."