Viewpoint What's the scariest part about finding roleplay partners?

[Rohlan]

I wouldn't say "scary" but something that is definitely hard is coming up with a plot, characters and all that stuff and then having that person ghost you. And then going through all of that again with a new person in hopes it won't end the same way.

 

[dangerfluff]

Scariest for me is the possibility that I might get too attached to a roleplay with someone who loses interest.
I fall hard for these stories.
It's a gut-punch.

 

[bunniboo]

With having high social anxiety, many things. I worry is my intro good enough, is the person going to be kind in turning down a suggested fandom they currently don't want to write, will they actually respond or is this going to turn into drama if things don't go right and am I going to have to avoid this person. There's so many factors since you never know the kind of person you're dealing with.

 

[sailorharuka]

The scariest part, to me, is like...seeming too excited about a plot/idea, which then turns into me trying to mellow out; but, then i wonder if i come off disinterested. So, i guess, to condense, the scariest thing for me is expectation (real or imagined) and whether or not i successfully meet them.

 

[Idea]

The scariest part, to me, is like...seeming too excited about a plot/idea, which then turns into me trying to mellow out; but, then i wonder if i come off disinterested. So, i guess, to condense, the scariest thing for me is expectation (real or imagined) and whether or not i successfully meet them.

I can't speak for anyone else, but one thing I love in a partner is when that partner really comes off as excited and passionate about something. This doesn't need to be too overt, but overt expressions of it do bring a grin to my face as well. Of course, there is a thick line between excited - even hyper-excited - and simply overattached or obsessed with something, as one is an emotional reaction and the latter is the inability to move from or look beyond something.

 

[Hypnosic]

Either I come across as someone who has no life or someone who procrastinate. I can grow to be overly obsessed with a roleplay and spam people, which makes me think they might become annoyed or weirdest out.

Also when I become overally invested in it and suddenly get ghosted without the roleplay starting or midway into it.

 

[Abyss]

Lately I've been really hoping to use some specific characters from my existing roster, and I've found it a bit more intimidating to try and find a partner to write a 1x1 RP with using the pre-made characters.

 

[ComKiraXKida]

Wondering if the person will ACTUALLY reply and Not just out of no where ghost you forever! And OF course people who brake your rules and hurt you characters in rps with out following or telling you that they where doing so.

 

[Edric Blight]

The scariest part is the wait after you post the starter once you’re all done plotting.

 

[Commander Rabbit]

Scary?

The only thing scary about RPing is when someone decides to take their problems in the RP and carry it with them like extra baggage. Saw it plenty in Wattpad. Pretty much it. Just because my dude insulted your dude doesn't mean you need to throw hands, pal. Doubly so if I reject some unrequited proposal just because my dude flirted with yours.

I guess, in that case, it's being scared of immature actions and viewpoints.

 

[Stanza]

For me, branching out at all. Silly as hell, but despite everyone on the site being here for the same core reason, I can't seem to logic my way into being brave enough to reach out 90% of the time. Totally a Beacon of Courage, I know.

 

[OrsusZoktivir]

my biggest struggle is to actually write that first PM. I struggle with my online presence more than I care to admit.

 

[blutgang]

i don't have any Big fears about 1 x 1 RP, but group RPs can feel like an actual nightmare when you're going in blind with a bunch of strangers. i've watched entire servers get nuked because too many people wound up not liking each other OOC, for reasons both inside and outside of RP, and it made the atmosphere too uncomfortable to write in.

 

[Solivagante]

Crossing boundaries, my own or my partner's.

I started RPing young and I got myself into some... situations. Nothing that was harmful to me IRL, thankfully, but a frankly concerning level of sexual content that I really wasn't ready to deal with, and wasn't actually comfortable with. I didn't know how to express that discomfort to the people I was writing with at the time, and I also think that the 'transgressive' feeling of talking to strangers on the internet at all (I grew up with the serious Stranger Danger messages of the early web, before Facebook made putting your real name online more common) sort of got muddled up with everything else. Like, I couldn't articulate that this was something that made me uncomfortable, because I wasn't 'supposed' to be writing with strangers at all, and I thought maybe it was all the same guilt/sneaky thrill, I guess?

I don't know how much I would blame anyone I wrote with at the time, because I tried my best to disguise that discomfort from them and just go with the flow. But looking back as an adult, that's part of what makes it scary. People crossed my boundaries because I didn't tell them, and I hate the idea that I could just as easily do the same to others and never know that I messed up.

A big part of why I picked RPN over other sites I looked at is that this site has firm rules against NSFW RPs, and I really like having those guard rails in place for reasons like this.

 

[.quietus]

My biggest fear is them basically just being... weird about things. Too many people have acted too friendly without really building any rapport with me, and literally all of those people ended up being way too obsessed with me. To be clear, I'm not complaining about people being genuinely friendly OOC; I love OOC shitposting, it's great! What I'm referring to is an RP version of lovebombing where they act like you're the best thing since sliced bread and then proceed to do wildly inappropriate things, like going off on you because you also dare to RP with different people. It's always oddly uncomfy when you've exchanged like three IC posts and they already insist you are their RP soulmate because a) wtf, b) you are just waiting for the other shoe to drop

I know most of these people are just socially inept rather than malicious, but bro

Oh, and - sadly - related: No, you do NOT love me. You don't even know what I look like and us talking for like three nights is not a solid basis for a relationship

 

[dear april]

posting an interest check and no one replying D: my absolute biggest nightmare… which has unfortunately become true in the past

 

[Jannah]

posting an interest check and no one replying D: my absolute biggest nightmare… which has unfortunately become true in the past

I'm used to this, but then again I have pretty niche interests.

 

[GojiBean]

Hoyo!

For me personally, the scariest part is the first 24 hours after I post an interest check. I spend almost that entire time wondering if my ideal has any appeal for other folks. This is especially true when I put together a Fandom RP which deviates from the source material. We all know how protective some folks can get over the source material in some fan bases. So, that's always a minor but ever-present concern. Lol.

Second to that initial 24 hour wait after an interest check, the scariest part for me is the beginning of an RP's life cycle. Usually up until the first 10 posts or so. Typically, if an RP I create can make it past 10 posts it's a safe bet that it will hit the 100 post mark before it either dies, or miraculously continues even beyond that. I've lost track of how many RP's I've started over the years across the various platforms I'm on. But in recent memory (within the last 2-3 years), out of the two or three dozen RP's I've started across all the sites I'm on I can only recall two or three which died after their 10th post and before reaching the 100th post. Not a bad track record.

But yeah, those first 24 hours after posting an interest check, and waiting out the first 10 posts are the scariest times for me.

Cheers!

 

[Nu Epiq]

Probably something happening that has nothing to do with the actual roleplay, drama, and it spilling into the roleplay.

 

[StrawberryAvalanche]

For me, is it's going along smoothly but then one day they just hate me out of nowhere and drop me. (Yes this has happened before :') ).

 

[Perpetual Zen]

Finding one. I actually have NEVER done a one on one because it really intimidates me. To have just one person to impress lol sounds backwards I know

 

[GreatSaiyaman31]

Personally, something I worry about when finding new roleplay partners is running into somebody I already know! I don't use the same username as my other social media etc, and I expect neither do a lot of the friends I know. Hopefully it never happens to me! Or, if it does, that it is a good experience.
What scares you the most??

One thing that bugs me out with some sites, including this one, is that if you forget something in your interest check people pop out of nowhere to critique, or at least that's how some come across. It's a real hit sometimes to the ego especially if you've been rp'ing for a WHILE and think that you've got the gist down. Makes ya feel inferior sometimes.

 

[Jesi-Jess]

From experiences;
- My partner lying about their age to rp with me, I had people try to evade my previous "+18" rule in the past. Lying is a huge no no for me in general and it never ends well.
- Honestly lying in general, like I don't need to know everything about you but if you do tell me something, I take good faith it's the truth, so if I find it's a lie it hurts.
- Being treated for how my character acts in a roleplays even if it's a 'positive light', cause I've had some people treat me a few ways and the reason being my characters.
- Using this and that reason to guilt trip me to keep roleplays going and getting upset if I focus on other things at all, especially if I need a break.
Things I have worried about but thankfully not experienced;
- Been brought up getting doxed, that yes but also in general just getting 'canceled' and publicly lied about even is a fear for me. I am new here and hoping it doesn't happen on this site but I do have other socials and I'd hate for those to be weaponized against me just because I had a disagreement or pulled back from someone. Mainly cause I'd seen people jump on the gun to cancel with little to nothing over mundane things or little personal problems. So yea, that can be on my mind for sure.

 

[wordmaven]

A bad first impression, which somehow ends up with a r/badrperstories post. Never happened to me but I dread that.

 

[JyoMonty]

A bad first impression, which somehow ends up with a r/badrperstories post. Never happened to me but I dread that.

I feel this! It hasn't happened to me either and I feel fairly confident that I'm cordial enough that this shouldn't occur.

Also, I'm a tad bit scared when I don't get a response within a few days of my posts. Not knowing what's going on with the other person can make you think the worst, you know?