Scattered Ambitions
4,000 club
3 minutes ago, Icerex said:
You're right. We aren't discriminated against. Asexuality has to be recognized as a sexuality before it can be discriminated against.
Opinion What do you think of asexuality and aromantics?
- Thread starter Scattered Ambitions
- Start date
You're right. We aren't discriminated against. Asexuality has to be recognized as a sexuality before it can be discriminated against.
Icerex
Lord of the North
Um, what? That makes absolutely no logical sense. Please explain why your claim is correct.
The Mechanist
Everyone's favorite cybernetic robot! 🤖
I thought it was pretty self explanatory.
Icerex
Lord of the North
Explain please.
Do you not realize that homosexuals were persecuted way before being gay was considered a sexuality? That alone disproves this asinine claim that you "can't be persecuted until you're recognized as a sexuality."
Axel The Englishman
The Holy Crusader
I sense tense tension on the horizon.
Pine
PK THOT ⚡
This is my first time actually hearing that? I mean I know about the persecution and all, but never really about that happening before being called a sexuality? I'm genuinely curious, not trying to argue, because I don't think asexuality's problems are rooted in discrimination.
Icerex
Lord of the North
It was widely (at least in the western world) considered a sin and/or mental sickness. Note, this attitude really only took root after the fall of the Roman empire and the spread of Christianity. The Romans and Greeks were pretty tolerant as far as being gay was concerned.
Cavil
idgaf honestly
What do I think?
IDC honestly. You do you booboo.
IDC honestly. You do you booboo.
AkuTheWolfOkami
The Shape-shifting Master of Goatees and Darkness
I think aesexuality is odd as an orientation. I'm alright with aromantic. There's some rationale I can follow there.
determinator
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
me @ the title before even reading the thread
i know this is going to be an adventure i won't regret embarking on
i know this is going to be an adventure i won't regret embarking on
Scattered Ambitions
4,000 club
me @ the title before even reading the thread
i know this is going to be an adventure i won't regret embarking on
This thread is about as dead as can be so
determinator
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Considering it was probably necro'd when I found it, I didn't know that lol
it was still a fun (/s) adventure
archur
watch for the flash
gabrielle
queen of angst
Heyo, I'm also an ace, so I find it obvious that I find it to be a valid thing. Asexuality is a very isolating yet beautiful thing to me. Surrounded by a sexual society, one of my biggest struggles has been to find a place where I don't feel so alienated or as if there was something wrong with me. I'd like to say I've gotten a lot better with resolving that, especially over the past year.
I've recieved a lot of bad because of my orientation. I've gotten the "you just don't like sex because you haven't tried it" "just wait for the right person" "you have a brain tumor or hormone deficiency" etcetera.
Worst of all I think has been the sexual assault that I went through this past summer because of it. I was in a relationship where from the start, I told him I was asexual and wasn't interested at all in sex. Through months of explaining it when it came up and trusting when he said he understood, I never thought such a thing would happen. But through misunderstandings and carelessness on his part I suppose, it happened. I feel like none of it would have ever taken place should I have a different sexuality, but this just brings up the importance of asexuality awareness that I want to promote.
It's an upmost importance for the safety of the entire ace community that people understand that we are not broken, and forcing us to "try it" will not magically show us the wonders and have us all for desiring sexual activity.
I've recieved a lot of bad because of my orientation. I've gotten the "you just don't like sex because you haven't tried it" "just wait for the right person" "you have a brain tumor or hormone deficiency" etcetera.
Worst of all I think has been the sexual assault that I went through this past summer because of it. I was in a relationship where from the start, I told him I was asexual and wasn't interested at all in sex. Through months of explaining it when it came up and trusting when he said he understood, I never thought such a thing would happen. But through misunderstandings and carelessness on his part I suppose, it happened. I feel like none of it would have ever taken place should I have a different sexuality, but this just brings up the importance of asexuality awareness that I want to promote.
It's an upmost importance for the safety of the entire ace community that people understand that we are not broken, and forcing us to "try it" will not magically show us the wonders and have us all for desiring sexual activity.
Sibelle Grey
Worldweaver
Personally, I think their orientations are as valid as any. And that's it. Some people are straight, others are gay, others are bi, some are pan, ace, aro, and so on and so forth. It's just the way it is. Wasn't aware of asexuality being an actual thing until maybe a year ago, though.
Truff
One Thousand Club
As far as sexuality and gender go, I truly 100% do not care. You do whatever makes you a happy human and as long as you aren't a shitty person, I won't be a shitty person towards you. The fact that people think anything otherwise kinda blows my mind.
StrawberryJaime
Not your goddamn “soft boi”
EXACTLY people are oppressing them for what/who they aren’t doing ? it’s kind of funny but also extremely sad to think about
Idea
The Pun Tyrant
Asexuality fascinates me. See, up until very recently I was plainly convinced this whole "different sexualities" business was akin to the Mandela effect or some psychological sickness. Now I am more inclined to believe it more closely resembles a fetish. Whichever the case may be of course, it wouldn't make sense to judge someone for it.
That said, asexuality or aromantism are matters which seem a lot harder for me to put my finger on. I honestly wouldn't blame anyone who jumped to the idea that it is some kind of sickness, after all the person is missing a particular emotional response.
That said, asexuality or aromantism are matters which seem a lot harder for me to put my finger on. I honestly wouldn't blame anyone who jumped to the idea that it is some kind of sickness, after all the person is missing a particular emotional response.
Malkav
A Real Human Bean
I recently came to terms with the fact that I am aromantic (heterosexual.) After years of flings and an inability to so much as crush on someone, I realized that I am just a total aromantic. I browsed a forum for it and just kinda noticed how what people were describing nailed me to a tee (hate shipping, don't get romantic movies, hate romance subplots, hate romantic rps, hate the idea of marriage, no crushes, no celeb crushea, etc.)
I also found posts that debated whether aromantics fall under the '+' in LGBTQ+, which is amusing to me. At first it was like "huh. Finally found a way to get in there, I guess." I don't care one way or the other. I'm an LGBTQ ally and heterosexual, let 'em have their thing, or include me in there in if they want. I don't think that aromantics are oppressed by society, nor asexuals for that matter (I've never heard of someone lynching an asexual or aromantic person. At the worst they have relationahip issues. Everyone has relationship issues.) The only thing that does bug me is asexuals and aromantics being lumped together.
I also found posts that debated whether aromantics fall under the '+' in LGBTQ+, which is amusing to me. At first it was like "huh. Finally found a way to get in there, I guess." I don't care one way or the other. I'm an LGBTQ ally and heterosexual, let 'em have their thing, or include me in there in if they want. I don't think that aromantics are oppressed by society, nor asexuals for that matter (I've never heard of someone lynching an asexual or aromantic person. At the worst they have relationahip issues. Everyone has relationship issues.) The only thing that does bug me is asexuals and aromantics being lumped together.
Remmock
Junior Member
I am a straight male. I have never nor never will care about another person’s identity or attraction. You like what you like. Doesn’t need more exploring to me than that. Mushrooms, rollercoasters, and knowing how to program a VCR aren’t for everyone. You do you. If someone picks on you for it, they’re a garbage person.
kibou
ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ̀ˋ
Not to derail the thread, but what exactly do you mean by "being gay is a fetish?"
I've seen you say that before and it doesn't make much sense to me personally, as a bi person. To me it's more about who I love, the relationship aspect, etc and sex is never my main focus when it comes to who I would date/why I would date someone. It is for some people, but that applies to straight people as well.
And anyways to stay on topic: I used to think I was ace, but it was a lot of personal problems and I don't identify that way. I believe it's asexuality is valid, but that there's tons of misinformation in the community, even when it comes to what sexual attraction is/feels like, and there's a lot of homophobia in it too which is kind of off-putting and something they should definitely work on. Demi-sexual is basically how most people experience attraction and is useless as a word.
I don't think that ace people are systematically oppressed. Whether or not that means they should be allowed in LGBT groups depends on how you define the community- as a place to gather and share lgbt-specific resources and to fight for rights vs some fun club for people who aren't straight. Whatever resources they'd need though is different than what LGBT people generally need as their biggest problem currently seems to be with individual relationships and representation in the media, and I believe that they'd benefit more from continuing to grow their own community.
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Idea
The Pun Tyrant
Well, I wouldn't go so far as to say as a statement "being gay is a fetish", I do not have the tools to make such a sure statement, but rather that it is more similar to a fetish than anything else:
-It's something you don't choose but is not necessarily a problem with your body (doesn't affect your homeostasis nor does it impair your function as a human being except maybe in the field of procration)
-It alters what you are attracted to and what can stimulate you sexually
-it's not a big deal
Keep in mind I specifically mentioned "sexualities". Homosexuality for instance is sexual attraction to the same sex. I don't know the specific term for romantic attraction to the same sex, but that seems to be considered as different within the LGBT+ community, and if it isn't then I do apologize for my misunderstanding. Whichever the case it seems to be like a reasonable explanation that covers the most facts about the situation.
kibou
ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ̀ˋ
Homosexual/gay/bisexual/heterosexual/etc refers to both romantic and sexual attraction. The split attraction model (if someone says they're a biromantic asexual for example) came from ace people who still want to date/fall in love with people. For the vast majority of people sexual and romantic attraction go hand-in-hand and influence each other, and therefore the majority of people have the same sexual/romantic attraction.
Fetishes are exclusively sexual and more about specific body parts/inanimate objects/etc and are considered abnormal to a degree. If being gay is a fetish by how you defined, then being straight would be too, but fetish doesn't seem like the right word in terms of definition and the connotations it carries.
Idea
The Pun Tyrant
That last part would be incorrect. Being straight wouldn't be a fetish for the very simple reason that it is a natural biological function. You need to be attracted to the opposite gender for natural reproduction to occur by instinct hence the human body is naturally geared.
My beliefs come from something very simple, occam's razor. I recognize homosexuality occurs. I do not see any explanation for it, and all the "proof" that I've come in contact with so far of it being a phenomenon independent from any other has been either been utter BS or come from studies with more holes than swiss cheese. As such I can only conclude that "new sexualities" are a misinterpretation of something else.
Which is, let me clarify not me saying I know for a fact what they are. In fact (and you seemed to have ignored that I said this in your last reply so let me repeat) I am not convinced they are a fetish, simply that whatever they are they share the most common symptoms with fetishes and hence are likely to be closer to that. Again, I do not have the tools to assert what they are, and whichever the case may be I am not saying anyone should be judged for it, quite on the contrary. All I believe is that this is nothing new and it shouldn't be treated as a big deal. LGBT+ people are people. Normal people.
As for the connotations of the word "fetish" I for one don't care about those. I use the words that I know of that I find to be best describe a situation. Plus in my eyes there is nothing wrong with fetishes, most if not all of us have one of some kind.
Cybear
Cyborg Ursine
This is an interesting subject for me as I can speak from both angles.
For most of my life (up until last year) I would've considered myself asexual. I had no interest in sex, or "taking care of business myself" it was to the point that people often thought I was lying, but it was true. I thought that the whole thing was disgusting, and it actually resulted in me and my ex breaking up, as she was into sex and I had no interest in taking part in it with her.
However last year I started HRT, and that drastically changed things. With my testosterone at a all-time high I finally understood what the appeal was all about, and have since taken it upon myself to get memberships on a few sites that I never dreamed I'd ever use. It's bizarre for me to think that even a year ago I thought that the whole thing was disgusting, when I now have an interest in it.
This has lead me to believe I had some kind of horomonal imbalance that manifested as asexuality, once that was addressed I reverted back to the standard. While I can't say that this is the case for all asexuals, I do believe that some of them are like I was, with said imbalance, and HRT could likely change them like it changed me. However if someone is happy where they are (ie. identifying as asexual) then they shouldn't have to start hormone therapy. Though I feel like if they are interested in it, then they should speak to a doctor, and see if they have an imbalance like I did.
I'm not a medical professional so I can't say all asexuality stems from hormonal imbalance, I am fairly confident that this is the case for some of them.
For most of my life (up until last year) I would've considered myself asexual. I had no interest in sex, or "taking care of business myself" it was to the point that people often thought I was lying, but it was true. I thought that the whole thing was disgusting, and it actually resulted in me and my ex breaking up, as she was into sex and I had no interest in taking part in it with her.
However last year I started HRT, and that drastically changed things. With my testosterone at a all-time high I finally understood what the appeal was all about, and have since taken it upon myself to get memberships on a few sites that I never dreamed I'd ever use. It's bizarre for me to think that even a year ago I thought that the whole thing was disgusting, when I now have an interest in it.
This has lead me to believe I had some kind of horomonal imbalance that manifested as asexuality, once that was addressed I reverted back to the standard. While I can't say that this is the case for all asexuals, I do believe that some of them are like I was, with said imbalance, and HRT could likely change them like it changed me. However if someone is happy where they are (ie. identifying as asexual) then they shouldn't have to start hormone therapy. Though I feel like if they are interested in it, then they should speak to a doctor, and see if they have an imbalance like I did.
I'm not a medical professional so I can't say all asexuality stems from hormonal imbalance, I am fairly confident that this is the case for some of them.
