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Realistic or Modern We All Break Sometimes (Main)

Characters
Here
Other
Here
MOOD: Oblivious/Nervous

OUTFIT: https://i.ibb.co/F5y3HHg/acc347a39b32addd4311493781260d25.jpg

LOCATION: Beach
basics
MENTIONS:

INT:

Qwertycakes Qwertycakes
tags
TL;DR Jolexei goes on an aquarium date
tl;dr
Josephine Kingston
Don't stress, don't falter

Jo nodded, slipping a shirt and shorts over her skimpy garment, before pulling Alexei in for a demure little kiss on the cheek. Then one on the lips. Then another longer one. After a couple more smooches, Jo reluctantly let go of her partner, knowing that if she didn't, then he probably wouldn't either.

The couple walked towards the boardwalk quietly, hands intertwined the entire way. As Alexei asked her what she wanted, Jo opened her mouth to answer when a gasp of horror escaped her lips. Here? Of course it had to happen right here, on the beach in her nicest bikini. In between her short legs was a massive brown stain, taunting her. A safe bet that there'd be no sexytimes at the drive in for her. Maybe Alexei would let her do something to him, which she did enjoy doing, but he likely wouldn't dare try anything with her. If he could even stand to be in the same room as her when the cramps and moodiness started setting in. "I'll just get whatever you have, I gotta go to the bathroom okay?" She informed her boyfriend, not wishing to reveal how mortified she was in this very moment.

Slowly creeping away, Jo hurried off to the nearest store selling clothes she could find, quickly purchasing a pair of women's novelty shorts. The pattern was completely horrendous, containing coconuts, palm trees, and hula dancers but it would have to do. Spotting the nearest bathroom, and acquiring sanitary products from a dispenser, she began to take care of her little situation.

Afterwards, she transferred the bloody shorts to an empty ziploc that had been in the beach bag, and stepped back out into the boardwalk. The queasiness had started to kick in as well, so she figured some beach air before reconvening with her boyfriend and trying to swallow down food would be a good idea. It really never failed to amaze her how amazing the beach in Anchor Bay was. She'd gone on boatloads of trips to tropical places with her family, but they didn't have the sense of hominess that the AB beach did. Of course, the doting boyfriend probably colored her vision a little bit, but she still liked to imagine that she'd adore it if she were single. After a few minutes, she began heading back to the shopping area, already imagining Alexei's laughter at her change of clothes. He was considerate of her especially during her period sure but she couldn't imagine him keeping a straight face. Not when he was wearing matching banana shorts.


code by valen t.
 
MOOD: Jealous, sad, angry

OUTFIT: Here

LOCATION: The street
basics
MENTIONS:


INT:

Ronan Myling Myling

Jean .Curious.Nat. .Curious.Nat.

tags
TL;DR: Fuck this shit
tl;dr
Jesse Casablancas
I am a nightmare and you are a miracle
Jesse opened his mouth to throw a verbal jab back at Jean. But instead just rolled his eyes dismissively, more interested in what his boyfriend was saying. Ronan's words and smug tone made him clench his fists in annoyance. Who did he think he was? Jesse wanted to grab the younger boy by the throat and push him against the hard brick wall behind them. Just to put him in his place. Not to hurt him, he never set out to hurt Ronan. And if he did, well, sometimes it was the only way to got the point across.

But he couldn't do that now, of course. Jesse was sure Ronan's little bitch boy wouldn't hesitate to call the cops if he even laid a finger on either of them. And he knew his father would beat him into next week if he had to waste time and money bailing his useless son out of jail.

Please, please just come with me. I only want to be with you.

Please choose me.


Is what Jesse was thinking. But he couldn't will himself to say those words. Not in this very public space. Not in front of Jean and anyone else who happened to be watching. "Come on. We're going," Was all he managed to mumble gruffly at Ronan, grabbing him roughly by the arm.
code by valen t.
 
mood :
upset& jealous




location :
Street
outfit :
mentions :
Myling Myling Qwertycakes Qwertycakes




interactions :
Ronan & Jesse
Valentine
;; Jean

As Jesse dismissed Jean, he thought that best suited him. Keeping quiet. Not showing off his so called boyfriend. Beating and manipulating his boyfriend from closed doors. Jesse was a pathetic excuse for a person, let alone a boy.


Jean then noticed Ronan and his presence. It was calm, which was different from what Jean would've thought. Maybe it's because he's not by himself? Jean could only assume from his body language.


Jesse on the other hand seemed like he was struggling internally. Jean couldn't care less. Especially when he told Ronan that they were leaving and grabbing his arm roughly like he did. He couldn't believe the site in front of him. The fuck was this beach boy bimbo doing grabbing him like that?!


Jean went in front of Ronan and grabbed Jesse wrist. "How do you even know he wants to go with you anyways,hm? You only care about yourself and what you want you selfish, abusive prick.." Jean said feeling his blood boil and his face getting slightly red with frustration. "Ronan isn't a punching bag and if I see another mark on his fucking body I will fucking come for you, ya hear? No amount of your daddy's money will save you" his blue eyes stared at Jesse's. His face, everything about him he.. he hated- and not just because he had something Jean could probably never have with Ronan except for a few moments that day.


Jean then came to his senses and sighed, looking back at Ronan. "What do you want to do? "


Don't fucking go with him. You don't have to go with me, but.. leaving me for him?HIM?























coded by reveriee.
 
mood :
Mixed emotions

location :
The streets of Anchor Bay
outfit :
mentions :
Jean, Jesse

interactions :
.Curious.Nat. .Curious.Nat.
Qwertycakes Qwertycakes
Chanthara
;; Ronan
"Come on. We're going.” Ronan flinched slightly at Jesse’s words, at Jesse's actions. He felt his boyfriend’s rough hands grabbing his arm. “Jesse… you’re hurting me.” The youngest boy said quickly in such a quiet tone his speech could barely be heard. He didn’t have time to react in any other ways, when Jean suddenly got in front of them and grabbed Jesse’s wrist away from Ronan. What Jean said next, made Ronan’s velvety brown eyes go big and round from all the surprise. Wait, what? Ro had never directly talked about Jesse’s abusive behavior. Just when did Jean figure it out?

"Ronan isn't a punching bag and if I see another mark on his fucking body I will fucking come for you, ya hear? No amount of your daddy's money will save you." Jean’s words ringed in Ronan’s ears. He was in too much of a shock to say anything. His mind went back to the conversation he and Dr. Berkowitz had about Jesse. Ro remembered the talk clearly and the influence it had on him. Dr. Berkowitz was right about Jesse’s actions being abuse instead of love. Ronan couldn’t deny it anymore no matter how much he tried. Not anymore.

He was having all sorts of emotions, his head was full of different thoughts. It all was very overwhelming. It all was enough to make Ronan feel a burning sensation in his eyes. He would cry at any given moment. But he didn't want to cry now. He didn’t want to seem weak to Jesse. Not anymore. He needed to get up his courage and end it all. Right now, right here. With these thoughts Ronan bit his lower lip, the slight pain made him only focus on the pain and it helped him to hold his tears.

So when Jean asked Ronan what he wanted to do, Ronan knew exactly what he wanted to say. Ro opened his mouth in order to say the words, but nothing came out. Would he really be able to do this? To end the relationship with Jesse? Ronan’s heart was now beating so hard it felt like it would jump out of his chest. Ronan was scared. Scared to take action, scared to stand up against Jesse. But luckily Jean was there for him. Quick glance at his friend, and Ronan felt how his mind and heart calmed down a bit.

“Break up.” Ronan mumbled quietly, but loud enough for the older boys to hear. His gaze was still glued on Jean, he couldn’t bear to look at his boyfriend. “I.. I want to break up.” Ronan kept a small pause in between his talk. It was difficult to get the words out. “You don’t actually love me, there’s no way to continue whatever we had between us.” Now looking at Jesse, Ronan bit again his lower lip. However this time it didn’t help at all and he couldn’t hold the tears back anymore.

coded by reveriee.
 
mood :
Shocked but happy

location :
Arthur’s
outfit :
mentions :
Arthur

interactions :
.Curious.Nat. .Curious.Nat.
Ahonen
;; Niila
"I know you do." Niila said in a loving tone to his girlfriend. He knew Arthur cared for him, her every action and word showed it, but it was still reassuring to hear it directly from her. She grazed her nose over his, and Niila chuckled a little. He took it as an opportunity to steal a quick kiss from the pouty lips of Arthur.

After that the two love birds were silent. The silence around them wasn't awkward or anything, it was quite the opposite. Overall Niila was a quiet person who didn't mind silence, a person who rather let others speak than speaking out loud himself.

But in Arthur's company he tended to be slightly more talkative. He wanted to showcase how much he cared for her and how much interest he held in everything Arthur said, so for Arthur he would try to talk more.

However it was nice to be in silence too. Niila felt like he could do that in Arthur’s ciómpany and not get judged by her. She was so sweet, she would never do that to him. The couple continued cuddling in silence and after a bit Arthur fell asleep.

"I love you." Niila heard the words slipping from Arthur’s lips. “Arthur?” He asked in confusion, but the girl didn’t answer, she was sleeping after all. Niila felt his face turning bright red. He didn’t expect to hear those words yet. Wasn’t it too early for the l word?

Niila’s heart was beating fast. Love wasn’t a word the boy heard often. He was pretty sure his father had never said it to him. His “mee” had said it maybe five times and his “äiti” had said it twice: once in lower secondary school, when him being bullied got revealed, and the second time at the airport when he left for the States.

So it was an understatement to say that Niila was a little shocked by that little word. But no matter how shocked he was, he was also extremely happy. “I love you too.” Niila said quietly as he kissed Arthur's forehead.



coded by reveriee.
 
MOOD: Who knows?

OUTFIT: Here

LOCATION: Beach
basics
MENTIONS:


INT:

Madi LittleWolfie LittleWolfie

Josephine tamarapasek tamarapasek


tags
TL;DR: Beach
tl;dr
Julian Vanderbilt
If I was you, I'd wanna be me too
"Wanna get some ice cream, babe?" Julian paused from strolling hand in hand with Madi on the boardwalk overlooking the crowded beach. He tugged Madi toward himself, pulling the beautiful blonde into his arms to give her forehead a kiss. They looked like the most ideal, happiest couple.

Julian himself though, he was not present in that moment. He was on autopilot as always, his brain five steps ahead planning his next move to charm Madi, to figure out the next little gift or gesture to show how devoted he was. Bonus points if it was in public for others to witness. It wasn't enough to win over Madi and her dubious brothers, he wanted the whole town to see him as the perfect fiancé. If not, what was even the point?

"I'll be right back then." Julian gave one last chaste kiss to her soft, blush pink lips before pivoting to amble off towards the nearby ice cream stand. He didn't even bother to ask what Madi wanted; women were indecisive, and he didn't have all day to stand around waiting for her to pick an ice cream flavor. After all, his darling bride-to-be was always more than happy to eat whatever he happened to order for her.

He didn't even make it to the stand, however, when the boy caught something in his peripheral vision that made him stop and stare in momentary shock, as if his eyes were deceiving him. The young woman's unmistakable cinnamon waves and fragile, waifish figure were almost enough to convince him, but when she turned slightly, that very distinct profile erased any doubt in his mind. It was Josephine Kingston, his once betrothed. Literally the girl that got away, according to the rumors. Julian didn't know if he believed in fate, but what were the odds of ever even seeing her again somewhere out in the world, let alone right here, right now in this absurd little town.

"Boo," The boy put a hand on her shoulder to get Josephine's attention. "Hey, you." With a satisfied smirk he watched the brunette turn, then stumble back in suprise as she recognized him. The look on her face was priceless yet completely familiar, one he'd seen a thousand times before. Her grey doe eyes huge and wide, like Bambi frozen in the headlights right before being obliterated by an 18-wheeler. That delicious look of terror that was reserved just for him. He had to admit, he'd missed it.

"Hey, Joey. Pretty wild seeing you here," The boy chattered on blithely, Josephine stiff in his arms as he pulled her into a hug. "What are you doing here on this fine day? Myself, I'm just here with my fiancé," Julian prattled on. He turned to glance over at Madi, who was now just staring at them, obviously confused, to which he simply returned a bright smile and cheerful wave.

"Well, I should get back. I'm sure I'll see you around," He mused breezily. Still wearing the same bright smile as he turned to wander off, though a trained eye could see a hint of malice in his crystal blue gaze, making the friendly goodbye sound more like a vague threat.
code by valen t.
 
Given Up.



Yohan faintly gave a little laugh, a thinning windpipe sound that he had lost touch with.

Specifically, chefs with unblemished titles didn’t like being told what to do. It was the same way with sickness whether it was all up there in the head or not; nobody wanted to be told they were sick. More so, the same was with liars.

For whatever purpose, deceptors like him felt it was threatening to have someone who was like this, like this assailant of a girl telling him that everything on the mattress of his tongue was messy, fake, and decent only for dreamers. But, that was why he laughed. She was open to argument, divisive and the opposite of what one expected to hear on a date. It was nice to have someone who didn’t believe at all in the things that his heart still tormented on him. How it tormented him.

Yes, Yohan Cho believed in love. He believed that his name had sounded lovelier coming from someone who cared about him. He believed those theories, exactly as he read them.

“Carson,” he admonished, listening to her talk to him about all the counter-reactions of his confession, as he unloaded more of the basket, “I still like you. Not the idea of you. Ani, I don’t care how you think I like you. You can stay up all night if you really care about that. I like you.”

Liked people to Yohan were like new recipes; he wanted to make them out to be the best they could be as recited through a sprinkle of salt or a eighth cup of sugar.

The basket opened in unison to him fore-mentioning, “It’s like you like pushing people away, but I don’t mind. And, I’m not staring at you like you’re a dog. I already have four back in Korea to do that with.”

“I’ll wear it down,” he segued from the mention of his previous observation, murmuring as his concentration focused on plating. The loamy and grainy smell of sliced homemade bread buttered their noses, and the ripened fruits were pared to perfection with their determinate colors poured in by the sun. His comely voice continued, “Not today or tomorrow, but maybe over time when you’re fifty or sixty and you’re staring at two post-modern couples on a park lawn like us you might think that it wasn’t me just liking the idea of you, it was me liking you.”

He hoped Dani Henderson would come to such a realization one day too.

He had reached back into the woven basket, but mid-flight it occurred to him, his eyes unbelievably meeting the eyes of his date a little above her button, small nose.

Nooo,” Yohan exclaimed softly, the spectrum of clouds circling rosy, “I forgot the jam!”

“I can’t believe I forgot the jam,” he said again at a continuing loss, leaning back on the heels of his propped knees for a mere second, “The jam!”


mood: loosely collected
location: park + car
on me.

© PASTA
 
MOOD: Nervous

OUTFIT:

LOCATION:
Lemon's house
basics
MENTIONS:
NA

INT:
Elf_Ruler Elf_Ruler
tags
TL;DR getting ready for a date with lemon
tl;dr
Reid Callaway
the sky is starting to look a lot brighter

Reid stumbled over his words as she asked if they could go back to his place. “Yeah, yea, sure, Jen isn’t home though… Just so you know.” He wrapped an arm around her waist as they headed back towards his car. Reid guided Lemon into her seat and waited for her to get situated before he closed the door to his mustang. Lemon reached over the center console, taking Reid’s hand in hers. Goofy smiles plastered to their faces. Reid constantly stealing a glimpse of Lemon as he drove their short drive back to his place.

He opened the front door of his home for Lemon, following her in after. “Hey… uh.” He paused, looking down at his soaked clothes, and back at her. “Just get a seat on the couch… I’ll… I’ll be right back.” Reid ran up the stairs, skipping three at a time. He dug through his drawers, and the basket of clean laundry he never bothered to put away. Grabbing out a pair of sweatpants and one of his black sweatshirts. Flying out of his room, and down the stairs again, he handed the clothes off to Lemon. “You can change in the bathroom if you want…” Reid’s eyes went wide as he realized what he said. “I mean, the bathroom is over here…” He turned to show her towards the bathroom off the kitchen. “I’ll start up a movie while you change?” Reid raised his eyebrow, trying to gauge if that was what Lemon really wanted.

She nodded and Reid went to set up the living room, before going to get changed himself. Reid started up some movie that he knew the two of them had seen before. Grabbing the giant basket of candy that Lemon had made him, and bringing it as well as a bunch of blankets over to the couch before Lemon came out of the bathroom.

“You know, I think those look better on you than they ever did on me.” He said as Lemon rounded the corner. Drawing her into his chest, he tucked his chin on top of her head, before flopping down on the couch together. Lemon was practically drowning in his sweatshirt, as it hung down close to her knees and he was only able to see her face. “Despite the change in weather.” He chuckled. “I had a really good day.” He pressed his lips to her forehead before laying back against the couch, and Lemon hooking her leg around him as she pressed her cheek to his chest.
code by valen t.
 
MOOD:

OUTFIT:

LOCATION:
Zach's bedroom
basics
MENTIONS:



INT:

lion. lion.
Chimney Swift Chimney Swift
tags
TL;DR
tl;dr
Harper Anderson
why can't you trust me? because i can't trust myself...

What?’ Harper signed furiously, of course she didn’t want Max to leave. Why would he ever think such a thing. Max didn’t get a chance to respond though, Zach came out of nowhere, wrapping his arms around the two of them. Her head tilted almost instinctively as Zach pressed his lips to her forehead. Her eyes closing ever so slightly while in his warm embrace.

Though he caught Harper by surprise as he signed to Max for what Harper believed was genuinely the first time.

Harper laced her fingers into Zach’s dragging Max behind the two of them as they made their way back downstairs. “We’ll be right in Dr. Lee!” Harper called over her shoulder as they made their way towards the door. Promptly punching Zach in his side as he blew a kiss over to Mrs. Berkowitz. She had an idea of how Mrs. B felt about Harper, it probably wasn’t great, and it definitely wasn’t going to make Mrs. B think that Harper had any braincells left.

Harper didn’t even notice when Zach had gotten the popsicles, as he peeled every single one to check the flavor before giving them a chance at them. “You’re a jerk.” Harper signed, though the smile on her face showed that she was mostly joking.

She rested her head on Zach’s shoulder as she watched the rain fall down, dripping off the roof as she whispered quietly to Zach. “Thank you….”
code by valen t.
 
MOOD:

OUTFIT:

LOCATION:
The Fish Market
basics
tags
TL;DR
tl;dr
Carter Zigmond
they can't break you if you're already been broken....

Carter had been helping her parents get the house ready for guests, though she wasn’t really sure why she was. When she herself, was invited as a guest. She likely wouldn’t have ever come home from England, without her parents begging her to come.

She finally had been given the chance to actually get ready. She had put on a white dress, and followed up her make-up with a dark smokey eye. The weather had finally cleared up from the afternoon rain. The sun had begun to set, and the party, or rather as Carter liked to call it, the ‘festival’ was sure to begin soon. “Carter.” Her mother called from down the stairs. “Coming.” She responded, rolling her eyes as she placed her mascara down on her vanity.

Her bedroom hadn’t changed in the years she had been gone. It was still simple, with way too much white and pink in it. She felt like she blended into it’s surroundings. Which was likely what her mother wanted, for Carter to just ‘blend in’. Sticking out, making a fool of herself. Trying to be different, while standing up for herself and her friends.

The mischief she got into along side Tatum, the firey red hair she had as a senior in high school. Everything that Carter did went against what her mother ever wanted for her. Slowly Carter left her room, closing the door behind her, she went downstairs meeting with her mother at the bottom of the staircase. “Yes?” She raised an eyebrow, her grip tightening around the railing.

“I just wanted to let you know, your father has some work associates coming tonight.” She paused, thinning her lips together. The tension that grew between these two women could cause an accidental fire with the friction they made. “One of them is very interested in meeting you.” Carter could only roll her eyes, so that was why she had been invited back home. For some set-up, some acceptable man for her to be with.

“You seriously brought me home, to meet someone.” Carter stated with next to no emotion. She wasn’t even shocked. She couldn’t be, it was something her mother was destined to do. She didn’t want Carter to end up marrying someone that didn’t fit their family standard. Though she would never admit that, though she would never tell her that. “Well that’s too bad for him.” She crossed her arms. “I’m assuming it’s a him, since you didn’t approve of my girlfriends in the past.”

“I invited a date for the night. We’ve just made it serious too.” Carter shrugged, not letting her mother say another word as she made her way back upstairs to finish getting ready. “I’m sure you’ll love them.” She turned over her shoulder to add, before she closed the door.

----​

Carter got a message on her phone from Buffy, “If you’ll excuse me, my date is here.” She made sure to announce to the entirety of the party. Slipping through the back gate Carter walked over to the truck sitting outside of her parents house. “Nice truck.” She said as she leaned onto the window. “So… You might hate me…”

“But hear me out.” Carter said, pressing her tongue to the inside of her cheek. “I may have invited you here, to piss off my parents.” Carter sighed. “But… My parents are trying to set me up tonight. And I may have told them you’re my boyfriend.”

“I totally understand if you want to leave. But if you could stay, and help me out… I’ll make it worth your while.” Carter winked.
code by valen t.
 
MOOD: dumbstruck

OUTFIT:

LOCATION:
The Lee Residence


basics
MENTIONS:


INT:

Zach lion. lion.
Harper Dazzle Dazzle

tags
TL;DR

tl;dr
Max Berkowitz

We accept the love we think we deserve.





Neither Max nor Harper could have predicted the next twelve seconds if their very lives had depended on it– before the youngest of the trio could so much as take a breath in, Zach’s arm hooked around his whole frame and soft lips pressed into Max’s cold forehead.
The wave of shock was so intense poor Max couldn’t even blink or move for nearly a minute. Instantly his face flushed red, eyes nearly falling from their sockets, his jaw dropped ever-so-slightly open as though he’d expected… something else.

But Zach wasn’t out of surprises. No, the surfer always had a trick up his sleeve more stunning than the last…

“Shut up. Nobody is asking you to leave.”
A simple sentence. Slow, punctuated movements, grammatically a little shaky, but Max understood it all perfectly.
No poetry in those few words, nothing deep and profound, but to Max, it meant more than anything in the world. It struck his heart just the same as if Zach had gotten down on his knee and asked for a damned marriage… just the same as if he’d promised that 16-year-old wound he bore with him had finally started to close.
Had Zach known more signs than he admitted to all this time? He’d been around Max for almost his whole life. He had to have learned a little just from watching, subconsciously… the muscle memory was there.

Max thought he would only ever dream of this moment. He had gone through so much of his life feeling invisible next to Zach.
His only friend, the only kid in the whole state of North Carolina who would so much as reluctantly agree to play with him once every now and again for a family vacation or a fishing trip. It had always been Zach that he knew, blonde and cocky and full of life. Always a little character, finding a home in the spotlight. Such a contrast to Max himself, who had always been small and quiet and absentminded, preoccupied with boring things like plants. Shy little Max fit perfectly in Zach’s shadow.

Seeing Zach step to Max’s level and finally make himself understood, for the first time ever… to reach out a hand, in the most literal sense of the term… Max had no words great enough to thank him with.

So he said nothing else for the rest of the night, afraid that a single word would dissolve the fragile tranquility that had settled over them. Zach led his new lover and his childhood frenemy down the stairs, grabbing a box of popsicles out of the freezer on their way through the kitchen. He stopped only briefly to banter with the parents, the look on Max’s mother’s face telling the smaller boy all he needed to know about the appropriateness of Zach’s commentary… Max rolled his eyes but couldn’t help but smile. He’d always been mortified in the past by Zach’s jokingly flirtatious remarks towards his parents, but now it felt so familiar that it was comforting. He’d missed it.

Loneliness makes one miss the stupidest things.




Max pensively twirled his popsicle in his mouth, mentally biting back on the dreamy but foolish desire to rest his head on someone’s shoulder as they watched the cold evening rain fall over the familiar backyard.

What would they have become of the three friends now, Max thought? Now that Zach and Harper were a thing, a bona fide couple…
Zach won his little game. And though it stung in ways Max wasn’t ready or willing to examine, he solemnly accepted that this was the state of affairs that fate had brought them to. But were they going to be friends again now, real friends, like Max had always prayed they’d be? Or would he just shrink his way back to his usual place as the third wheel to something that he didn’t deserve to fully be included in?
After all, he’d never have a relationship of his own like this. He didn’t even know how to react to it. Maybe they’d want more time to themselves from now on, to focus on their budding romance.

But for the first time in his life, in some way shape or form, he was confident that there would still always be the three of them.
Zach, Harper… and him.
He was there too. He had a place here.
He wasn't invisible.

code by valen t.
 
MOOD: annoyed

OUTFIT:

LOCATION:
Jonah's Family Bar
basics
MENTIONS:

INT:

@qwer
tags
TL;DR Sed fermentum tortor nulla, vel sodales nibh bibendum eu. Maecenas a lacus a libero blandit commodo. In lobortis aliquam urna, id tempor ex semper at
tl;dr
Astraea Dupante
there are so many beautiful reasons to be happy....

Astraea practically melted as Jed pulled her into an embrace. The way he kissed her temple was so soft, and felt so meaningful. Nothing like the attention she had been given by others. He should not be named as Carson suggested they call him. “Ohmygosh.” Astraea practically slammed all three words into one with the speed they came out of her mouth. “That is so sweet of you.” Astraea stuck her nose in the flowers, taking a big sniff of them.

“Much better.” Astraea smirked as she sat down again on the bar stool. She took a sip of her refreshened drink, she crossed one knee over the other as she tapped her fingers on the wood below. Astraea wanted to be bold, but she struggled with the how when it truly came down to it. “You know I could go for some… Fun?” Astraea shrugged her shoulders; she really wasn’t too sure what she was saying at the end of the day. Or if Jed would even understand what she wanted.

She reached forward, placing a hand on his thigh. This was what she wanted, right? Someone else to show her what it really was. Carson said she was missing out, didn’t she? Astraea felt so left behind in everything. She wanted to feel sexy, and brilliant, and like she knew what she was doing. But all she could do was follow someone else’s lead, and mask herself till she figured out what she was truly supposed to be doing.
code by valen t.
 




Tatum Browne

It didn’t take long for Tatum to reach the water, and really it was a beautiful day for the beach and for her to figure out how to surf. Not that she would be doing much surfing overall, but if it made Ryker happy of course she would learn. So, as she turned around when she felt his presence, she let her body press close to his arms around his neck, “You’d let me get boo boos?” a small pout forming on her lips.

It was more than a little difficult for Tatum to figure out the board, falling almost every time but laughing as well. Yeah, she sucked at it but she was having fun with Ryker, her hair was sticking to her face but she knew eventually, probably not today, she would successfully stand on a board. For now, she couldn’t even really get on and stay up without wobbling over the side. It was nothing like she expected, “You know, I didn’t expect it to be difficult.” She finally said after falling yet again. She moved her hair from her face and looked at Ryker, “I much prefer watching you then having myself land in the water constantly.”

The time ticked by and Tatum could feel her stomach rumbling again for food. Which in her case was a good sign, she was doing better with her appetite and finally actually wanted to eat something, though sometimes it wasn’t a lot, but she still wanted to eat. Really, she wanted to give up on the day of surfboard, “I’m getting hungry, I think we should eat and let my ego heal from all the falling. Unless you can kiss that better.” She teased. But she left the water and let herself enjoy the food that Ryker had packed for them.


Mention(s): Interaction(s): @OdinsTwoWolves

 




Carson Hughes

The way her name rolled off his tongue was something Carson couldn’t place, “Cho, you’ve made it clear from day one you don’t like me. So, the only change is you like who you think I am or might become.” Why call him by his name when he wasn’t getting it through his mind that he had already told her once he didn’t like her. She knew this, she had accepted this and she, well she didn’t have feelings left in her to give. She let herself feel the sun against her skin, letting Yohan continue with his words, “When I’m old who knows what I believe or where I will be, but a picnic doesn’t equate to love, my dear.” It was as if everyone loved to point out that Carson pushed people away, and she did. Not for their safety but for her own. Keeping anyone at an arm’s length was safer than letting them in. Safer than letting herself be broken by her own hope, if you kept your expectations low then the pain of being let down hurt less.

Finally, she took her moment to stop Yohan, “When I’m older there’s a chance everything now was meaningless, relationships, friendships, work, because we can’t decipher what life will be like. What will matter is how I felt in moments, and yeah I might look at a couple on a picnic blanket with a basket and remember the boy who wanted me to feel like I mattered to him.” She didn’t elaborate any more on her words as she watched him begin to make her food.

She had let herself enjoy the sun until she heard him say no and she could see how distraught his face was from the loss of the jam, “It’s fine. I don’t like jam anyways.” She couldn’t help but laugh at this vulnerable moment with Yohan, who was beside himself about jam. He was trying to explain the importance and really all Carson could do was laugh. But she couldn’t let him continue his jam rant. She leaned over to him and pressed her lips to his softly. Letting herself linger there for just a moment extra before pulling away. She could see the shock on his face, “So anyways.” She started as she took the food from Yohan, “Like I said I don’t like jam. So I will eat this without it.” And she took a bite of everything before her.

The food was immaculate, “Ten out of ten. I do enjoy good food.” Yohan had been mostly silent after she had kissed him, which was kind of nice for Carson. It helped her to plan out her evening, which meant not having sex with Yohan because this was their first date, and she didn’t put out on a first date. After that, she’d have to grab Cleo, get her set up, and then spend the night with Jay, in hopes that tonight would go mostly okay. But for now, she would enjoy her time with the chef who made her food, but never could be honest with her or probably anyone.


Mention(s): Interaction(s): lion. lion.

 




Lemon Pierce

Lemon felt cold to her bones as she sat in Reid’s car, doing her best to not shake, but on the drive back to his house she had been hunting for a therapist for her and Max and overall, the search she had assumed would be fruitless until she landed on a Dr. Bennet and she knew it would be perfect for her best friend, she just decided not to say anything to Reid yet, in case it failed. She knew he would get his hopes up for her and she didn’t want to be the one to let him down if it didn’t actually happen, so she sent a quick email on her phone and then they were in the driveway.

Reid was quick to open her door and quick to get her inside. Her body still drenched from the rain, she almost missed Reid saying he’d be back and with exactly what she needed. While she stared at herself in the bathroom mirror, she couldn’t help but feel like all of this was inevitably going to end, but as she switched into his warm clothes, breathing in his scent she knew she wanted them to last as long as possible. He made her happy.

As she came back out, she let herself get wrapped up into Reid, where she felt safest. Where she felt happiest. She let herself rest on Reid’s chest for a while before she decided she no longer cared about the movie and instead cared more about continuing learning Reid and herself. She was careful as she got his attention and brought her lips to his, “This is okay right?” she questioned and once she got the okay the movie became only background noise.


Mention(s): Interaction(s): Dazzle Dazzle
 
MOOD: nervous

OUTFIT: beach gear

LOCATION: beach
basics
MENTIONS:


INT:

Qwertycakes Qwertycakes
tags
TL;DR Sed fermentum tortor nulla, vel sodales nibh bibendum eu. Maecenas a lacus a libero blandit commodo. In lobortis aliquam urna, id tempor ex semper at
tl;dr
Jacob Morass
when you are kind to others, it not only changes you, but the world.

Jacob’s laugh boasted from his chest as Tabs called him a jerk, shoving him back into the water. Coughing up sea water because he couldn’t stop himself from laughing as she playfully shoved his shoulders back into the water. As if she ever so slightly wanted to drown him. As Tabitha stopped shoving his head towards the water, and Jacobs breath quickened, as he realized that Tabitha, the Tabitha Carter, Tabs, was straddling his lap.

Her face was so close to his, he could have sworn they were sharing a breath. And Jacob was starting to realize he needed to distract himself from his impure thoughts. Trying to think of dead puppies or his grandma. Before he knew it, her eyes were matching his. He swore they were sparkling, with the way the reflection of the sun bounced off the water, gleaming into her eyes.

Jacob didn’t know what was happening at first, as Tabitha’s face came towards him. He didn’t dare move a muscle as her lips found his, pressing against his. He didn’t know what to do at first, but eventually his eyes closed and he relaxed into her. Moving his lips along with hers, he tried not to think too much about it, as her tongue joined the kiss. He didn’t want to do something wrong, he didn’t want to make Tabitha think he didn’t enjoy this. He wanted every second with her to be like this. He wanted her closer.

One of his hands dug deep into the sand as he drew his other around the small of Tabitha’s back. Oddly too aware of the way her skin felt on his fingertips.

As Tabitha pulled away, Jacob knew his face was bright red. It had to be in the moment, there was no way he wasn’t. But, all he could think about was how hot Tabitha looked in front of him. And how she made him feel, ever thought that he had tried to use before to get him to think straight, had flown away in that moment. “W-wow…” Jacob trailed off as he brushed a lone hair out of Tabitha’s face. “Thanks?”

“Thanks for inviting me.” He smiled, before leaning back in again. “this, this is okay right?” He whispered, glancing up at her eyes, before pressing her lips to hers again.
code by valen t.
 
MOOD: excited

OUTFIT: Don't Be Suspicious

LOCATION: Behind the school.
basics
MENTIONS:


INT:




tags
TL;DR Let's go to the aquarium! A much-needed break from the constant trauma of Anchor Bay
tl;dr
Oliver Dreyfuss
How lonely it is, to be drowning in a place where everyone can swim


For Oliver Dreyfuss, skipping school to hang out at the aquarium with his friends was a precarious experiment the likes of which he had never attempted yet before.
But sneaking out of his apartment, risky though it may be, was the easy part. This he had done thousands of times.

The trick was getting out before anyone had a chance to be the wiser. His mother wouldn’t be the real threat his morning. She’d been drinking late into the night, and Oliver knew she would be sleeping like the dead until long after he was out safely.
His sisters, though, were a different matter. Lori and Ella were light sleepers and could easily be disturbed by him sneaking around at 3 in the morning. And though neither had the wrath of their mother, neither could be trusted not to tell.
They, too, had reasons to resent Oliver as the weakest link in an already broken family. Perhaps they had cause to blame him for the way things were now.

First peeking through the slatted door of the closet he slept in to make sure no one was awake out there in the dark hallway, Careful to make no noise, Oliver grabbed his school bag from the floor and slowly tied his shoes. From underneath his bare mattress, he pulled out a bent hairpin and a small allen wrench, and he slid his hand through the door slats to pick the lock open from the opposite side. Painful on his wrists, but he was used to doing it.
He’d memorized a path across the old floorboards of the hallway to minimize creaking, reaching the living room where thankfully the window had been left open. That made his work much easier, he thought, as he stole his way down the rickety fire escape at exactly 4:15 AM, yet again effortlessly slipping through the cracks of the prison he called home.

Oliver was a multifaceted being; an oddball whose youthful appearance, nerdy eccentricities, and rapturous love of marine turtles all starkly contrasted his bleak outlook on life and propensity towards minor crime. One might never know it from looking at him, but the wraithlike and soft-mannered teen had become something of a pint-sized thug.
Adulthood had yet to cast its shadow on him, and still, he had picked up aggressive and antisocial tactics for holding his weak grasp on safety. In the face of the harsh conditions he was forced into by the cold clutches of poverty, neglect, and abuse, he had become a feral alley cat. When he wasn’t allowed to eat or sleep, he’d sneak around town stealing food and hiding in parks and corridors. He carried an illegal switchblade concealed in his pocket at all times, even slept with the thing tucked into his hand…

His mother quickly went to work making his delinquent tendencies known throughout the town. The woman herself wasn’t the source of her power: it was the community that she carefully trained to look the other way.
After all, it takes a village to raise a child. Likewise, it takes a village to break one.

Oliver combated this and fought to maintain his lifestyle by frequently switching up his routine: never stealing from the same store twice, appearing and disappearing from lone streets and alleyways, and making sure not to linger in the same places for too long.

This made the New England Aquarium a safe bet for a day of teenage antics… he’d never been before, not once in his life, though he’d often dreamed of it.
His family could never have afforded such frivolities in the city as a trip to see the aquarium. Besides, Oliver himself was an embarrassment to have out in such a busy public place. He’d always thought that he and Myrtle, the aquarium’s resident celebrity 90-year-old green sea turtle, were simply never destined to meet.

But everything was different now. He had friends who weren’t afraid to break some rules for such a pilgrimage.
So for hours, he waited behind the school for them, mind racing with anticipation. There were risks, yes… there always were. But this was worth it all and more.

code by valen t.
 
MOOD: Jealous, sad, angry

OUTFIT: Here

LOCATION: The street
basics
MENTIONS:


INT:

Ronan Myling Myling

Jean .Curious.Nat. .Curious.Nat.

tags
TL;DR: Fuck this shit
tl;dr
Jesse Casablancas
I am a nightmare and you are a miracle
"Jesse, you're hurting me."

Ronan's plea was ignored. The blonde boy kept a firm grip on him, as if the other might flee if he let go. Still gripping Ronan's arm, Jesse was quickly confronted by Jean's strapping form suddenly wedged between the two boys.

"Get your fucking hands off me, twink." Jesse spat the words out angrily, piercing blue eyes narrowed in a hateful glare as he wrenched his wrist free of Jean's grasp. His attention snapped back to Ronan, however, when the youngest boy began to calmly speak, suddenly dropping the most brutal of truth bombs.

The news hit Jesse like a punch to the stomach. He was breaking up with him. Ronan was actually breaking up with him. He let Ronan's arm slip from his grasp, and for just a fleeting moment Jesse's face scrunched up in anguish as if he might cry.

Jesse wanted to protest, to admit and argue that he did love Ronan, and beg him not to do this. If they were alone, he would have. His own shame, fear, pride, and anger wouldn't let that happen though. Instead, he needed only close his eyes and take a cleansing breath to will himself to calm down, his face returning to its normal stoic glare.

Without another word, the dejected boy turned and stalked off bitterly, back in the opposite direction from whence he came. Ronan would be sorry for this, he'd make sure if it.
code by valen t.
 
mood :
Mixed emotions



location :
Home > car
outfit :
mentions :
Jean



interactions :
.Curious.Nat. .Curious.Nat.

Chanthara
;; Ronan
Ronan was laying in his bed. He had already done all his morning routines and was now just having a moment to gather his thoughts. Couple days had passed since the break up. Ronan was feeling mixed emotions. He was happy to break free from his abuser, but also sad it was over. It was so dumb. It didn’t make sense for him to feel sad and heartbroken. Shouldn’t he be just happy? Ronan had dreamed earlier how his life would change if he ever was able to be freed from Jesse. But reality was quite different. So far nothing had changed. Jesse kept still bombing him with messages and still Ronan felt like he himself was the quilty one.

“Ronan, I’m off to work. Make sure to not be late!” Ronan heard his sister yelling from the hallway. Roslyn’s voice, however, wasn’t enough to make Ronan’s unnecessary thoughts stop. “Yeah, I will!” He yelled back and sat up on the bed. The door made a clicking sound when it got shut, and so Ronan was left alone in the apartment. It felt quite scary to be left alone. It was absurd to feel fear in his own home. It felt like Jesse could come there in any given minute. But no. Ronan hadn’t seen Jesse for the past few days.

He kept avoiding the older boy and made sure to always be in someone’s company if he left his home. It was something he had practiced even when they were still together. Jesse had contacted him and kept sending messages. Messages about how he loved the younger boy and missed him. They were difficult to ignore. Ronan wanted to believe in the messages, believe Jesse actually loved him and missed him. But deep in his heart he knew what he had experienced was not love.

Ronan’s phone buzzed on the nightstand. He grabbed the device and noticed a message from Jean. The message just stated Jean was waiting for him, but it was enough to make Ronan’s lips curl up in a smile. Jean was an important friend to him, and the one who encouraged him to break up with Jesse. The younger boy was scared to walk alone to school, scared of bumping into Jesse, so Jean had promised to give him a ride. He took his backpack and left the apartment.

Ronan wasn’t excited about school. He had promised to take part in a protest his other friend Max was leading. Something about the school breaking a rule. Something about how girls should be allowed to join the football team. Ronan didn’t feel that passionate about the subject. Truthfully he wasn’t interested in the protest at all, but maybe it would keep him busy and give something else to think about. Ronan was a little afraid it would cause a conflict, and one more conflict was something he didn't need in his life.

With these thoughts Ronan ran the stairs down. He didn’t want to make Jean wait for any longer. At the apartment building’s parking lot, he saw a familiar car and a familiar face in it. Seeing Jean made Ronan smile again. He waved at his friend before getting closer to the car. “Good morning! Thanks for giving me a drive.” Ronan mumbled as he sat down at the seat next to the driver’s seat.

coded by reveriee.
 
mood :
I wanna throw up




location :
Car
outfit :
mentions :
Myling Myling




interactions :
Ronan
Valentine
;; Jean

I feel like I'm waiting for something that's not going to happen..and I hate myself for it.

Jean hadn't gotten good sleep,not that he ever does, in these past couple of days. The fake boyfriend, meeting Rosyln,seeing the bimbo boy, and the kiss. Jean could've swore Ronan was going to let Jean kiss him again if not for his ex-boyfriend coming. Of course maybe that was just Jean trying to make the situation his own..he wasn't really sure what to think.

He knew that he couldn't go to sleep again that night in confusion. His body wouldn't allow him to. He figured he needed an answer. Not that they have to be together right now,but that ge wasn't crazy to think that there was something within all the "fake" bliss that happened between them...and that the kiss meant something to Ronan as well. Jean could only hope.

He got out of bed and hit his alarm off since he was up before it even beeped. He had to get ready for the first day of school as well as to pick Ronan up.

He went through his closet. Throwing his clothes all over his bed after his shower. He still smelled of the sweet salt water he loved so much. What do you even wear when you're going to confess your feelings? Jean now felt like he was in over his head.

If he says no..he says no and I'll have to accept that even if it hurts...I'll have to pretend like everything's fine after that so he doesn't think it's his fault. So he doesn't think he is the cause of anything..so he doesn't worry. That's the last thing I want. I'd rather him hate me than let that happen.

After Jean got ready he headed out the door into his jeep. The old dusty thing was still up and running. He still hadn't named her yet after so long of having her. At this point he should just name her Jane Doe or No Name.

After starting the engine he drove to Ronans house to pick him up. Anxiety washed around him. Should he do it before school or after? Should he even do it at all and just endure whoever else he gets with? The sex stories he will tell Jean? God he couldn't think straight, he even almost got into a car crash for spacingout,but he got a hold of himself.

He parked in front of his best friends house and waited for him, texting him that he was outside. The way Ronan had a goofy smile and waved at him...did he want to ruin this?

"Good morning..you're welcome. You know I don't mind,but you should really get your licenses or a car soon. I'm not gonna be here forever...also put on your seatbelt. Im not gonna have you fly out tge windshield" he jokingly said, pinching Ronans cheek softly. He then started to drive to school.

He didn't care about school,or the protest if he was being honest. He'd rather not be there. The only thing that was occupying his mind was the person sitting next to him.

They did chat for a bit in the car ride,but nothing serious. It wasn't until Jean parked in the parking lot of the school he spoke up. "Hey Ronan..I have to tell you something..and I don't think that my mind can rest until I say it-"

Oh fuck, I'm really gonna do it? I already got his attention I can't back out..my mind is not going to allow me to,but my heart is probably going to go into cardiac arrest at this point.

"When we were pretending a couple days ago..am I imagining that there was something more than it just being fake?" He asked barely now looking at Ronan with his blue eyes.

"-because for me I did. I felt something with you. That day made me realize that I have..I have feelings for you. More than just best friends. I'm not asking you if you'd go out with me out of respect for everything that has happened. I just want to know how you feel..and if I have a chance in the future. If I should wait for you..?" He said, the last part almost a mumble,but could still be heard.

I feel like I'm going to die.






















coded by reveriee.
 
MOOD: Vive La Resistance

OUTFIT: Mark Berkinstock

LOCATION: Anchor Bay High
basics
MENTIONS:
Ashley tamarapasek tamarapasek
Ronan Myling Myling
Dylan Myling Myling
Max

INT:


tags
TL;DR Ivy and Ashley team up with Max and Dylan to create their own Les Miserables over a Title IX violation.
tl;dr
Ivy Dawkins
Don't threaten me with a good time


Ivy pulled a loose blue-and-grey flannel up over her skinny shoulders, rustling her fingers through her hair to get just the right shaggy texture to complement the look. Grinning devilishly at the smudged mirror in the bathroom, she tried on a couple of slouchy, dramatic poses before settling on an awkward posture that most suited the caricature of anxious Max Berkowitz.

Would cosplaying a fellow student to his own protest qualify as bullying?
Probably not, but Ivy didn’t give a damn even if it did. She wasn’t doing this for Max. She was doing it out of love and reverence for her sister-bestie.

She couldn’t be the hot friend every day. She owed Ashley one after her Dress Situation at the boat regatta, anyway. One of them had to take the L, and out of the kindness and purity of Ivy’s gentle heart, she had agreed to don the trappings of everyone’s favorite panicky closetcase so that Ashley’s glamorous face could take the full shine of the spotlight as they made their high school debut.

Yes, high school– after gladiator-fighting their way through the hellscape of middle school, they were finally ready to breathe life into all their wildest Mean Girls and High School Musical fantasies. It would probably turn into Heathers by some point in the first semester, but that was just fine with Ivy. Ivy loved a little drama. She’d grown up a theatre kid, and though she’d left her performing days at the stage door when her family dropped her off like a bag of trash, she still found herself craving a little razzle-dazzle in her otherwise dreary life.

No, Ivy was no Little Orphan Annie…

And Ashley and Ivy’s first day at school promised enough spice to get the gremlins through the week. After making the cut for the fiercely competitive cheerleading squad and securing their spots at the top of Anchor Bay High’s food chain, the two best friends had decided to take their game to the next level and bet the squad that the football team wouldn’t let a pair of ragamuffin girls try out to play.
And whaddaya know? Those rat bastards don’t let girls play. Which, as Mark Berkinstock would adamantly point out later, is illegal.

So they had teamed up with fellow cheerleader Ronan Chanthara, the least-offensive Lowes Brother Dylan, and of course little quivering homosexual Mark himself, along with everyone else who wanted to pick up a torch and pitchfork and tag along. They were having their very own La Résistance outside the school on the very first day, to show those old fucks in charge that at Anchor Bay High, #WomenHaveHands.

Yes, the whole town would soon know the names Ishley Dark and Avy Pawkins.

code by valen t.
 









When it came to the five stages of grief, Winona was not following the framework. She went through denial in the hospital, huddled in the depression for a few weeks after it happened. But now? Now she was all anger. And she was so angry that there wasn’t a sight of acceptance in her seemingly endless journey.

Since August 5th, it seemed like Winona’s life was beginning to spiral. Losing Dustin needed to be done as she hated second guessing herself while she was his. Her fall had pushed her to a level of pain that mimicked the pain she felt the night of the car accident. And Winona did what she did best and that was hide. She didn’t talk to anyone, and she didn’t see anyone, no one knew how she was really doing. Causing for her mentality to wither more and more as she pushed everyone away.

Being rejected by Vincent and then finding out about her best friend dating someone who made her life a living hell did not help either. All Winnie could ask was: why her?

Anger had erupted in her as never before, but it was to be expected, this was anger that she kept in her for over three years. She was bound to explode as she didn’t have a medium to navigate her emotions anymore. And a new Winona emerged. And she drank and smoked weed, and she gossiped with her twin brother as their heads dangled off his bed, their enlightened minds exploring conversations and questions about themselves and about Anchor Bay. But the old Winona stayed, and she still hid. And a battle ensued within the cracks and crevices of a broken ballerina.

But then there was Kieran who had helped distract her. He had let her explore a new side of her without judging her or invading in the grief that she so desperately needed to go through herself. On Labor Day she had found herself in bed with Kieran and she wanted to keep him a secret for as long as she wanted, but Max stopping by and seeing Key leave had ruined that. She didn’t care though; she then found herself spending as much time with her old friend and was willing to do anything to experience that willful blindness that occurred around him.

Which was why she was hiding in the bathroom. Winona thought she could make it through the school day, but the attempt was already failing. The twins had asked their mother if they could stay home as neither of them were ready to interact with the crowds of Anchor Bay High School, she said one could stay. Chance picked rock; Winnie picked scissors.

The dancer had asked for some type of escape and Kieran had answered, he was coming to get her, and she was grateful. She didn’t want to see Max and answer any more questions about Key. She was going to avoid Ashley and Dustin for the rest of her life. She wasn’t sure if she was ready to face Harper yet and have the truth about Harper’s relationship with Zach bleed onto her face. Some people still looked at her with pity, walked around her like she was so fragile. And her ballerina friends continued to talk about the recital, the one she couldn’t be in anymore. It was too much for Winona Matthews. Ditching the rest of the school day was better than going through four more periods.

So, when Key gave her the advice to leave through the gym, she grabbed her things and emptied out of the stall she found shelter in. But alas, life was still unrelenting when it came to letting Winnie have it easy. There, right in front of her, stood Harper, a look of surprise on her face due to Winnie’s quick movements out of the small confinement. Winnie freezes, clutching her bag with a death grip and her heart beating a little faster. She was avoiding this, why couldn’t she just make a clean getaway? With a soft smile on her lips, Winona finally addresses one of her closest friends. Harper, ugh, hi.












mood: exhausted; scared; flighty; angry; depressed

location: Anchor Bay High School

outfit: instagram/snapchat post













playing:
Lost In Translation

by:
the neighbourhood
















mentions: Kieran, Max, Vincent, Chance, Dustin, Zach

interactions: Harper

tags: r e i r e i

Chimney Swift Chimney Swift

Dazzle Dazzle

purplecowdutch purplecowdutch

Qwertycakes Qwertycakes

lion. lion.


º º code by ditto º º
 
mood :
Mixed emotions



location :
School
outfit :
mentions :
Jean



interactions :
.Curious.Nat. .Curious.Nat.

Chanthara
;; Ronan
"Yees, I'm working on that. After I failed my driving test the fifth time, Roslyn told me to pay for the driving license by myself." Ronan blabbered to Jean's comment on how he wouldn't be there forever and the younger one should eventually get a driving license. His right hand went to touch his buzzed head, a gesture Ronan often did when he was feeling embarrassed. Ronan chuckled when Jean pinched his cheek in a joking manner. Ronan put on a seatbelt as Jean had suggested, and then they left the apartment building's parking lot.

The car drive went in a peaceful manner. The pair of friends did some chit chatting, but not anything too untypical. Not until the car was parked in the school's parking lot. Jean opened his mouth saying he had something to tell Ronan. Something he had to say or his mind couldn't rest. This made Ronan worried. "Umm.. Okay what it is? Is everything all right?" Ronan worried out loud. What Jean said next made Ronan have an unpleasant feeling in his throat. "When we were pretending a couple days ago..am I imagining that there was something more than it just being fake?"

Jean's words ringed in Ronan's ears, and he was already able to tell where this was going. "Because for me it did." The words were simple, yet meaningful, and they made Ronan anxious. Jean was an important friend to him. Someone he loved dearly, but only in a platonic manner. Only in a way you loved your friends and family. In a way the older boy had always felt like a brother to Ronan. Then Jean went on describing his feelings further. The day they pretended to be boyfriends had made Jean realize he had romantic feelings for Ronan. He was not going to ask Ro to date him out of respect, but he did want to know whether he had a chance in the future. Whether he should wait for Ronan.

Ronan felt like there was something stuck in his throat. He didn't know what to do or what to say. He didn't want to hurt Jean or his feelings. Part of Ronan wanted to just run away, but he didn't do it. He knew he had to answer somehow. "I.." Ronan started unable to continue his words any further. "Umm.." He mumbled again as an attempt to talk. "Jean, you know I love you, but only as a friend. You've always been like a brother to me. I can't imagine being in a romantic relationship with you." Ronan was eventually able to say.

"I don't want to hurt you and I'm so sorry for not sharing your feelings. Please don't hate me for this." Ronan continued and his voice cracked a little bit as if he was going to cry. "I.. I think I need to go now or I will be late from the protest. Thanks for the ride again." With these words Ronan got out of the car. He picked his packback, closed the car's door and started to walk away. Ronan didn't dare to look back at Jean. Instead he just kept walking.


coded by reveriee.
 
mood :
anxious

location :
home > car > school
outfit :
outfit
mentions :
Max Chimney Swift Chimney Swift

interactions :
Vinnie purplecowdutch purplecowdutch
Ivy Chimney Swift Chimney Swift
Lowes
;; Dylan
Bunch of students had gathered outside of the school in a big group. What had started just as a handful of students, was now something more big and grand. Dylan gave a bright smile towards Max: the protest was going well. The protest had become such a shitshow even reporters and media were getting interested in it. One of the reporters got closer to Dylan and pushed a microphone towards his face.

"I've heard you have gathered here to protest against the title IX violation. Could you tell more about it?" Dylan tilted his head in confusion. "What does title IX mean?" He blurted out without thinking. His answer caused some fuzz in the human mass close to him. "What?! He doesn't know what he protests for?" The voices were mean and judgemental. "He's so fake." One voice said. "He´s a Lowes after all!" Another said.


When Dylan woke up his heart beated so hard it felt like it would jump out of his chest. There was cold sweat on his forehead. It took a couple seconds for Dylan to realize what he had experienced was a nightmare. What a nasty nightmare it had been. People getting to know he wasn't as knowledgeable about politics as he let others think, was one of the biggest fears in his life. Dylan took up his iphone close to his pillow and looked at the time. It was only four am. He took it as an opportunity to google everything about title IX so the nightmare wouldn't become reality.

Dylan was unable to fall back to sleep after the nightmare, so when the morning began, the boy was extremely tired. Dylan finished doing his morning routines by putting his outfit on. It was not his best outfit: just something simple and comfortable. It combined both traditionally feminine elements and traditionally masculine elements. It felt good to dress again just as he wanted. Sadly he had got rid of most of his traditionally feminine clothing, but that only meant one thing: he could go on a wild shopping spree once he had time.

Dylan took a quick look at the mirror before leaving the house. He had dark circles under his bright blue eyes and he looked like he had woken up from the grave. Great. Dylan could only hope that the day would continue better than it had started. "Don't say anything." He mumbled when seeing his brother Vinnie, who had promised to give him a ride to the school. The car drive went in a peaceful manner. Dylan didn't feel like talking so he was mostly quiet. "Bye, I'm off!" Dylan simply stated when the two of them arrived at the school's parking lot.

Dylan had been excited about the protest, but the nightmare had made him anxious. Anxious people would be able to call out his bull shit. Dylan tried to calm down himself. He kept reminding himself that if he had been able to keep up a certain act for the 15 years he had lived, there was no way he would just accidentally drop the act after a small dumb thing like a nightmare. Dylan Lowes was known as the least problematic Lowes brother. Someone who was into politics, 100 % but still polite and ready to give no fuck about gender norms. “You can do this Dylan.” He whispered to himself as he walked away from the school’s parking lot.

“Yo Ivy! Nice Mark cosplay!” Dylan then yelled while waving his hand to the younger girl. He walked closer to her with a small yet friendly smile on his lips. Dylan tried his best to not let the nightmare ruin his day. The protest would go well and no one would learn the shameful fact of him being a fakely woke person. “Are you excited for the protest?” He then asked. Maybe having a convo with someone would distract him from his thoughts.

coded by reveriee.
 
mood :
I wanna throw up




location :
Car
outfit :
mentions :
Myling Myling




interactions :
Ronan
Valentine
;; Jean

"Jean you know I love you...you're like a brother to me..I can't.."

Those words all kept crashing down on Jean. He couldn't even be mad at Ronan. He was more mad at himself. Why did he have to feel something? Why did it have to be only him? Only Jean that felt differently.

As Ronan was getting out the car he knew right then and there that he fucked up. Ronan didn't even have the smile he usually shares with Jean. After Ronan was out of sight and went into the school Jean put his head on the steering wheel of his car before hitting his dashboard. The words fuck and shit all came out as if those were the only words he spoke for the time being.

His tearful eyes looked around him. The forsaken school he now hadn't wanted to enter. He then took out his phone and texted Ronan.

'I'm sorry. That was too rash of me. Don't worry I respect your thoughts and feelings. Nothings gonna change. I still want you to be apart of my life Roro. You're my best friend at the end of the day."

Sent

He figured sending something was better than nothing. Right?

I'm so fucking stupid to think anything good could ever happen. Did I forget who I was? The screw up I am? I'm lucky he said no. He doesn't need this is his life like that. Hell he already had enough shit happen to him,why did I think I'd be any different?

He then concluded that this school day was over and he was already backing out if the parking space. He didn't care about anything anymore. The sounds of his father rang all through his head as ge drove down the highway to the beach.

"You're pathetic"

"Who could ever want you?"

"You'll end up alone and stay that way till you die"

The list goes on..






















coded by reveriee.
 

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