The Fear principle (Accepting)

(Sounds good)


Bailey's cheeks flush and she clears her throat uncomfortably, hand rustling through her pocket to search for her car keys. The heat in her face began at the compliment of her smelling good and increased at least threefold the more Rinji elaborated. She caught Jaguar's eye and managed an awkward chuckle, swinging her left arm out to open the backseat of the car. Regardless of how drunk Rinji might be, this was still something that was incredibly uncomfortable for Bailey to hear.


"Thank you," She muttered, shifting and re-situating herself so that she could help the secretary slide into the seats, "If you need the car to stop, just let me know, okay?"


Stepping back from the car, Bailey closed the door, careful to make sure that none of Rinji was going to get slammed into it. She moved around to the driver's side door and glanced over the top of the car at Jaguar, truly at a loss as to where they should even go now. "Who's house am I driving to? I'd rather it be someone who's sober enough to navigate, personally."
 
"Let's just take her home," was Jaguar's response as she glanced back at Rinji in the backseat, sighing. She wondered if the girl would even remember their evening together, but she suspected the answer was yes. Rinji seemed to have an annoying habit of forgetting what Jaguar would like her to remember, such as how to do the tasks she asked of her, and remember what Jaguar would rather her forget, such as any embarrassing information she might discover about her.


"You can drive her car for her," she went on, "and then I can drop you back off here again to get your car. That makes the most sense."


It would mean she would be alone in the car with Bailey, as well as forced to spend more time with her in either playing beauty parlor with Rinji or else tucking her into her bed. From the looks of her now, Jaguar suspected Rinji was closer to crashing than staying up all night painting nails and braiding hair, and she vaguely hoped this was the case. She didn't want to risk what the girl might say in front of Bailey while drunk, as she felt more than enough damage had been done today.


(hair braiding or tuck her in? Conversation in car between jaguar and bailey after?)
 
"That works for me." Bailey muttered as she opened the driver's side door.


Sliding behind the wheel of the car, Bailey waiting to start it until Jaguar was in. She buckled her seat belt quickly and started driving. The night had been fun, it had been nice to get out for a change and dance with people and to just be anonymous. It had, however, involved little discussion with Jaguar about what had happened earlier in the day, or at all for that matter.


"Do you think we'll be able to get away with not doing hair or nails or whatever tonight?" She glanced in the rear view mirror briefly at Rinji and took a deep breath. "We should at least hang back to make sure she gets some water or something... might keep her from getting sick."


Bailey stopped at a red light and glanced out of the window, noting that it wasn't particularly busy that night. Drawing in a small breath, she figured that now would be just as good of a time to bite the bullet as any.


"I'm sorry. About earlier, I mean." She began, tapping her fingers on the steering wheel and easing her foot onto the gas. "I don't think that I was in the wrong, but I could have approached it differently than the way I did."
 
((Jaguars so stuck on the idea that Bailey ratted her out to Jeremiah xD Jeremiah figured it all out on his own :P the only time he talked to Bailey was to give her new assignments. Speaking of which, should we bring Matthis in once we're back at Eyes of Man?


Also, I have this idea written up we could use later, Faith Eliza Cord, of Jeremiah needing Jaguar's help with something that requires him to trust her, and then maybe because of that later she might trust him back enough to talk about Mason. Just trying to set up a reason for her to tell))
 
(Sure, Nala. For both your things mentioned. And guys feel free to return at any point)


"I don't think it will be a problem," Jaguar said. "We can carry her in and get her settled, check to make sure she'll be okay, and give a rain check for the beauty routine."


Rinji had fallen asleep, slumped against the window, or else was so deeply relaxed that she was resting with her eyes closed. Jaguar glanced back at her, checking on her, and as she turned onto Rinji's street, she took her time in responding to Bailey.


The girl did seem genuinely to mean what she was saying, and no doubt she did. But she could not understand what she had done to Jaguar by having told Jeremiah about her. She could not understand, and Jaguar could not quite let go of her anger.


"You don't understand what you did," she said finally, her voice measured. "Jeremiah is now saying that he must be present when I work with Mason. This is unprecedented and an invasion of both our privacy. This will interrupt the relationship I will be trying to build with him and the dynamics that must be in play, and it may compromise his case entirely. There are...there are facts that you don't know that I do, and you had no right or knowledge to interfere without knowing them too."


Her voice is not angry, but it is not warm either. As they pull up in front of Rinji's condo, Jaguar gets out and hauls her up, slinging Rinji's arm over her shoulders and helping her inside. She has to dig in Rinji's pocket for her key.
 
Bailey's eyebrows furrowed in confusion when Jaguar mentioned Jeremiah. What did he have to do with her calling for someone to help get Jaguar out of the cell? Hell the only time Bailey's ever really spoken with him was when it was absolutely necessary, especially when she first started, or when he gave her assignments... this wasn't... what?


"I never said anything to Jeremiah," She told the other woman, glancing over at her briefly before parking on the side of the street next to Rinji's house. "I was just apologizing for trying to radio in to get someone to extract us... whatever Jeremiah did were his own actions, I had nothing to do with that."


Unsure how to continue, she climbed out of the car and opened the door. Shaking Rinji's shoulder lightly once she'd gotten access to the backseat, she softened her voice a little, "Rinji... hey, Rinj? You're home, hon. C'mon, let's get you inside and into bed, okay?"
 
((I gtg to work in about an hour, so hopefully I'll be able to post the Jeremiah thing whenever I get back, or if not I can do it tomorrow. I was gonna have it be at night, when shifts were ending, but I'm too anxious so I think maybe I'll schedule it for morning lol I assumed no one wanted to skip past another day just for that))
 
Never said anything to Jeremiah...that was what he had said, but Jaguar had not quite believed him. It was just like him to be diplomatic and cover for others, not wanting to stir up trouble between them. If Bailey had not told Jeremiah, then that was better than if she had, of course. Maybe it was true that Jeremiah would have noticed on his own, with his own monitoring, even without Bailey going to him or telling him or having tried to call for the guards.


Still, Bailey shouldn't have done as she had all the same.


"That's how it ended up," Jaguar said after a few moments, and then said nothing else about it. Helping Bailey to get Rinji inside, she eased her up the steps with difficulty, as Rinji lived on the third floor and was very little help to them with her steps. The girl did not seem entirely awake nor entirely asleep as she lolled her head against Bailey's shoulder, her arm around Jaguar's waist as she dragged her feet.


"Sleepy," she mumbled. "Warm."


Jaguar rolled her eyes but was smiling slightly as she juggled the key and the front door, helping her through with Bailey and then settling her into her bed. Covering her, she went to look for aspirin and water to give her before heading towards the door, looking over her shoulder after Rinji had lay down again to make sure she was settled. As she walked to Bailey's car, for Bailey to drive her back to her own, she is quiet, ready now for the day to end.


(Skip to next day?)
 
((Yay! ^_^ I get to post before I go to work, then? :3 I'm gonna post just in case, and you can ignore it if you want))


It was late in the morning, an hour or so before lunch mealtime would start, when he finally had to take matters in hand and do what was necessary, rather than avoiding what was uncomfortable for him. He took a deep breath, resting his head in his hands, and searched for Jaguar, giving her a quick, precise message. Meet me at my quarters. He was almost always there, when not working. He had no one to go home to and so it was rare that he actually left Eyes of Man, short breaks for recuperation permitting.


He made his way from his office to the living quarters meant for simple overnight stays, carrying his shoes and jacket rather than putting them on - and perhaps that was a clue to how far he had let himself slip. Presentable and clean-cut were always how he had liked to appear, and walking through the halls barefoot was clearly not that, no matter that there was no one around to see.


When he reached his quarters, he dropped the articles of clothing on the floor - sloppy, something he never did - and paced, shutting himself off from the facility because if he didn't he thought he would perhaps go mad. When the door hissed quietly open, he glanced at Jaguar, pausing, then turned and walked to the small bed in the corner. He sat with his feet braced wide and ran his hands through his hair, breathing carefully. Jeremiah had always looked vaguely tired since he'd started working at Eyes of Man - always - but that was because he was always expending energy to observe, and for the most part he gained it back by eating and sleeping. But not now. Now, his hands shook as they ran through his hair, his eyes were dark and weary, and his shields were thinner than he usually held them. He looked a wreck, and he knew it very well.


"I am going to ask you to do something for me, Miss Addams." He said, quietly and without the usual preamble. "I am going to ask you to do something because I am desperate," He took a careful breath, let it out slow and shaky, "And because I trust you." He trusted her as much as he could allow himself to trust anyone, and perhaps she was the only one. "It has been three days already, and if it continues much longer I am afraid I will be of no use to anyone at all." He shook his head slowly and just looked up at her, weary but with a vague sense of courage and solemnity.


"I need you to put me to sleep." He was going to have to lower his carefully maintained shields and trust her not to root around in his mind once he was too far gone to stop her, and he was going to have to trust her to have enough skill to be able to force him to sleep without doing any damage to his psyche. There was no one else he could think of that he would allow such dangerous liberties. 
((If you want, Bailey could go to analyze Matthis before mealtime to see if he can be allowed to go to the cafeteria/mess hall with the others? And then, I know Izabella Mochizuki wanted Jack to mess with List and Crane. I'm leaving in 20, though, and won't be back for four hours))
 
Meet me in my quarters? For Jeremiah, this seldom meant anything good, and after the events of yesterday, Jaguar was particularly wary. No doubt he wanted to probe her further, or at the least give her instructions for how her session with Mason today, with him now present in the room too, would go. To say she was unenthused was mildly putting it, and Jaguar took her time in meeting him in his chambers.


However, when she stepped inside the room, her leeriness disappeared as soon as she took in Jeremiah's appearance. The man looked unkempt and weary to the bones in soul as well as body, and she frowned, genuinely concerned as she looked him over. He clearly had not slept or eaten well in some time, and it was beginning to take its toll.


Soul radiation, was what term she used for this. When an empath went too long and deep within other's thoughts and emotions, it began to seep into the core of him or her, infecting him or her with the other person's pieces of self and removing bits of his or her own self. If it continued for too long, the person could become what was referred to as "shadowed," and a shadowed empath was the most dangerous of all. A shadowed empath would continue to soak up the others and be unable to help or heal them, to use what he or she took onto himself or herself for good and would instead only damage himself and the other person. This could happen to Jeremiah, and Jaguar was almost alarmed.


"Sleep?" she repeated his request, understanding its gravity, the trust he was showing in her. "Yes, you're correct, you need it, and immediately. You know you shouldn't take this on so much."


She hesitated, then beckoned for him to come forward. "Come here. I can set this right."


Rinji has not yet arrived; in fact, she has only just dragged herself into the shower. With an extensive hangover today, she's going to be rather late, not that it will concern her.
 
Jeremiah knew very well what she was thinking of, without even trying to actually go into her thoughts. She was wrong in thinking that he would become shadowed - he had long since taught himself how to keep his own sense of being locked away, free of taint. Beyond that, he only ever gleaned surface thoughts and emotions, only delving deeper when it was absolutely necessary. He knew the risks of his position, of his job, and he had taken precautions. And yet, why could he not sleep?


When Jaguar looked at him, she seemed puzzled at first, but then her expression grew serious and he knew she understood the importance of his request. She beckoned to him and he stood, walking over to her and stopping a foot or so in front of her. He kept eye contact because it was habit and because it was grounding, and ignored the way it felt as if his legs would like to buckle beneath him rather than hold his weight. He had better control over his physical body for that, as well.


"What I know and what I must do are two entirely different things, Miss Addams," He said, giving a tired. "I have a purpose here, and one I've carried out until now." Now he had reached his limits, and he knew that missing a day of work would be preferable to losing his ability to keep his own self in mind.


He sighed softly and shook his head. "I feel I must tell you that I've taken certain measures for safety. Mason Cooper's cell will not admit you until I am there to override the command. . . You must understand my caution." He couldn't have anything potentially dangerous going on while he was sleeping, and no matter what had happened, Jaguar and Mason Cooper were very dangerous when put together. He knew it would upset her, but wasn't going to lie to her just to make either of them more comfortable. He was already putting his mind in her hands - trusting her not to retaliate for this while he was weak wasn't a very far stretch.
 
“No, that’s bullshit, Jeremiah,” Jaguar said bluntly in response to his statement, shaking her head firmly. “What you know and what you must do should be the same exact same thing when your life is on the line. It’s not just yours, it’s everyone’s. You go that long without sleep and you’re putting all of us at risk. You’ll make mistakes, cause harm. You shouldn’t do it again.”


Maybe it made her a hypocrite to say so, seeing as how what she knew and did often wildly differed, but she wasn’t going to point this out. Instead she narrowed her eyes as he told her that Mason would not be available for her access for the day, already thinking but being careful to shield her thoughts that she would find a way around this.


“That was unnecessary and inappropriate, but we have things to get through now,” she says instead. “Come here. Give me your hand.”


She held out her hand, lightly placing it on his forehead, and spoke subvocally. "Be still. Be silent...and look at me. Right into my eyes, and don't struggle, no matter where I go."
 
She was angry with him. It was easy to tell that, even without searching for the actual feeling of it. He had know she would be angry, but he had done what he had to. He let her berate him, let her swear at him, and fought none of it because for the most part it was true. When she told him to come closer, he obeyed, giving her his hand and just closing his eyes with a slow breath, beginning to lower his shields one by one. He hated it, instinctively, after having kept them up for so many years and rarely ever gotten rid of them. He hated feeling so exposed, but it was necessary, and he had already told himself he would trust her.


"I will not rush you." Something like this would take precision, and effort on both their parts. He had gone three days without sleep, a few more minutes wouldn't hurt. He opened his eyes when instructed and looked at her again, willing himself to let her influence in rather than instinctively shoving it back out as he'd trained himself to do. He was going to have to just rely on her for this, and let her do whatever she would do.
 
Jaguar's eyes remained open, looking into his, searching their depths. She looks past the most shallow thoughts and emotions to the ones going deeper down and pries further, gently, carefully, seeking out first what he reveals to her openly, then what she has to press harder to find. Jeremiah is being still and quiet, as she has requested, and she leans closer unconsciously, her hand still lightly touching his forehead.


Slowly she peels back the layers of his thoughts, seeing first those of others that he had taken upon himself, and then his own, the shallow ones at first, then deeper. Jaguar feels his emotions along with him, his weariness and strain and concern most prominent, testing his fears, his sadness, his anger and his pain all at levels he normally would not reveal. She sees them, moves past them, to the part of him that is silent, still, and uniquely Jeremiah, housing his core. She comes to this part of him and she strokes it lightly with her own thoughts, whispering into his core.


"Sleep. Sleep. Sleep."
 
It was disconcerting, having someone else inside his head, and that was putting it very, very lightly. Snce his childhood, since the Killing Times, he'd kept himself sealed up tight so no one could ever touch him, and now that he was allowing someone to do that very thing he'd fought so long against - it was difficult. But Jeremiah was a willful person, even if only in a quiet way, and he pushed his own instincts down.


He did his best not to track her progress, not to try and hold on to anything she pulled away because he knew - had to know - that she wouldn't take anything that was his, anything that was him. It was a struggle, but he persevered through the plain and powerful discomfort and let her do as was needed.


Finally, she was there, at the heart of him, and it was almost painful, not in any physical way but in a sense of losing a control he'd had for most of his life. Sleep. . . Sleep. . . He let her instruct him, let her tell him what to do, and his eyes started to close. He swayed slightly on his feet before collapsing slowly, and he knew he shouldn't have been standing for this but she caught him anyway. He felt that much before he drifted to far to hear or see anything at all, and then was gone.
 
Jaguar had been prepared for Jeremiah to fall, and she readied her arms, using her body as a brace to catch him. There was not a very good space in his office to sleep, so she simply eased him to the floor, clearing off a space for him and putting his jacket beneath his head as a pillow. Looking down at him, Jaguar pushed her hair back from her face, regarding him.


For Jeremiah to trust her as he had said a lot about him and his faith in her. She could have easily caused him harm or exploited him, going further than she had to or even trying to influence him in some way. She could have dredged up memories he didn't want her to see, and he had trusted that she would not. He had not tried to push her out to or retaliate...he had let her do as she needed.


She feels less resentment towards him as she exits his office, but she is still thinking about Mason. She will find a way to override the system, or else get Bailey or someone like...RINJI....to be the person to open it for her. She can find a way around this.


**


Rinji is nearly forty minutes late for work, and slightly more subdued than usual, having a headache, but she nevertheless smiles at everyone she passes as she settles into the filing area for the microchips, even as she comments, "Why is the light so bright today? It's like staring into the sun...has anyone ever done that before? They always say it will make you blind but if you do it for a short enough time it totally won't. It just makes your eyes hurt, that's all!"
 
((I'm here, you want me to just introduce Matthis, and then Bailey can come in to evaluate? Jeremiah's asleep so I'm kind of done with him for now lol)) 
Matthis Westerfield did not like Eyes of Man. He'd grown used to the hovering feeling at the back of his mind that he couldn't quite reach, having felt it for almost two days already and been thinking about other things to care too much. The feeling, the person, wasnt trying to push or pull at him, just watching, and he had no problems with observance, only with manipulation. He had spent a few hours scouring every inch of his new space to know it, then had simply laid down on the bed and hadn't really left it since. He occupied himself with his thoughts, and tried to keep them away from his present condition.


The cells, while not very small, were still caed off and impossible to leave without being let out. If he thought about it too hard, or for too long, his breath would quicken, his throat would feel tight, and he would hover on the edge of panic attack for a while, if not fall over the line completely. He didn't like when that happened. It made him feel helpless, out of control of his own thoughts and feelings, and he had worked too hard at keeping those things at bay to just have it ruined by something as simple as a closed door. It was the fact that there were no windows that got to him.


Though he hadn't been visited beyond admittance and meals for the past day and a half, he wasn't truly surprised when his door opened. He raised his eyes from where he lay curled into a loose ball on his bed, looking past his own hands at the person that entered. He made sure he was emptied still, so that she couldn't try to empty him herself, and just watched, waiting for her to approach and say what she would say. She didn't have food and it wasn't a meal time, so he wondered why she was here. 
((Izabella Mochizuki 'Ello? :3))
 
((Oh woops, my bad xD I got you and primal mixed up, didn't I? Okay. We can do breakfast then, like Faith said. You want to start or you want me to start?))
 
((Gotcha. Just a minute or two or seven :P )) 
In the morning, it was List's job to make sure Crane woke up on time, as it always was. His mind or body tired from days' events, the empath tended to sleep like the dead and not wake for anyone but his brother - peacefully, anyway. He disliked being woken by 'strangers'.


Once Crane had been shuffled to his feet, List shooed him into the bathroom to wash and busied himself straightening up the bed. After they had both showered and dressed in appropriate clothing, he rolled his eyes, smiling only faintly but fondly still, and had to help Crane dry his hair better, as the empath had ignored that task and just left it dripping. Still, by the time the 'orderlies' - as List liked to call the faceless lackies of Eyes of Man - came to retrieve them, they were ready.


List took Crane's hand and led him out into the hall, following the person guiding them until they had made it to the mess hall, where List let Crane get his own tray. Crane was capable of doing most things for himself, but enjoyed the attention being looked after got him. List didn't mind, so long as his less-than-sane brother was safe and happy. After so long of practically raising his own twin, he was used to all of the quirks.


((Hard writing for two male characters in third xD I used their names so many times O.o ))
 
((sorry Nala! I wasn't around on the site or the internet much at all yesterday... I just got back from college so it's just been laundry and unpacking for me.))


The moment Bailey stepped across the threshold of the cell, she knew that her newest student was an empath. She hadn't even been trying to reach out to him, and yet she could feel the way he was instinctively blocking himself off to her, as though trying to distance himself from their meeting. Knowing that she must tread carefully, especially with someone like this, Bailey took a careful step into the room and tried to make herself appear as pleasant as possible, though the previous day made it fairly difficult.


"Good morning, Matthis." Bailey said quietly, her eyes trained on the body lying on the cot. "My name is Bailey, and I'll be your teacher during your stay here at The Eyes of Man."


She doesn't expect an answer, not with how hard he appears to be working to keep himself closed off, or at least a little numb. But still, she reaches out toward him with her mind in an attempt to maintain what little calm she can without breaching the shield he's put up against her.


"This meeting with you is nothing more than just a brief assessment, where we can get to know each other a little; why you're here, if you need any questions to be answered, and explain what will be expected of you during your stay." It's here that she gave him a small smile, keeping her posture casual, yet formal enough to still command authority. "Why don't we start off with you telling me why you think you're here, and then we'll move on from there?"
 
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