Soldiers of Chaos

[-.-.Lucifer.-.-]

Their kind words lifted into his ears, making his heart flutter gently. The feeling of fingers taking through his hair calmed him, and he stared onward, gazing at absolutely nothing as he breathed heavily. He wiped the back of his hand along his eyes, brushing tears away from his face and sniffing sharply. "I love you guys too." He croaked, letting his vision fall behind his shoulder, glancing at Levi.


That man was recponcible for Eren's destruction, his life, the whole hope of humanity. Guilt weighed heavy on his mind as he thought of all the things he probably sacrificed to keep him on his feet, to make sure he didn't lose his grip on reality. "You should thank Heichou." He murmured, raising his head and looking directly at their captain. "He's the reason I was able to keep in control." He then stood up, his hand cupping Mikasa's cheek generously before moving towards the Corporal. "We have a duty to abide. Annie is still out there."

 

[Mituna Captor]

Armin let his eyes close as he smiled softly, his eyes now dry of any tears, because Eren was okay.


Levi's cheeks flushed and he looked down at the floor.


"I..." He was stuck for a reply until Eren mentioned Annie, finally giving Levi something to talk about.


"We will find her... I have to go again after tonight to join the search party, but as soon as she had been found, I will send word back to here to let you know. Eren... You could come with me, you're pretty valuable to the search, but I'd also understand if you'd want to stay here, with Armin and Mikasa... Either way, it's up to you." He said with a small smile, tucking his hands behind his back and regaining his immaculate posture, his eyes were the only thing that let him down, they were red and watery.

 

[-.-.Lucifer.-.-]

The sight of his Corporal made his heart sink. Of course he'd love to stay with his family, and nurse them to health... but he had a responcability. Besides, he knew they were in good hands. He weighed the options in his mind, knowing well that his captain could wind up with the shorter end of the stick if Eren were to stay behind. He nodded slightly. "I'll go with you. We should set out now. Armin can deploy with the other cadets when he's well enough." He saidnwith false confidence. He glanced back at the blue eyes, his chest swelling with a cluster of unknown emotions. "Let me say goodbye."


Eren jogged back into his friend's room, hand automatically cupping the male's cheek. He didn't know why he did this, but the feeling of his warm skin gave him hope. He knelt next to the other's bed, nose brushing against the side of his friend's face. "I'm leaving with Levi. We have to track down Annie before she can either breech the wall or find my father." He felt sadness well in his eyes as he spoke. "Deploy with the other soldiers as soon as you can walk, make sure to stay in the middle of the formation." His lip began to quiver, realizing this was the first time they'd been separated since Eren had saved him from the throat of a Titan. "Be careful." He breathed, restraining the urge to plant his lips on the male's forehead. Fighting back tears, he ruffled the boy's hair. "Stay alive."

 

[Mituna Captor]

Tears swelled in the blondes eyes once again and he stared up at Eren, nodding numbly, as if the thought that they were going to be separated hadn't even hit his head yet. When Eren said that last little thing, everything kicked in all at once and he bowed his head quickly, trying to stop the tears that poured down his cheeks, he whimpered slightly in pain as he wrapped his arms around Eren's neck and dragged him close.


"You can't go!" He cried, his face buried in his neck...


"Can't... You can't... You can't leave us..." He whispered, his quick breaths hot against Eren's neck.


"Don't go."

 

[-.-.Lucifer.-.-]

The shaky whispers of the blonde made his hear strings right tighter, threatening to rip the hooks that embedded deep into the red tissue. His chest burned as his body was pulled closer, tears dripping off the others face and rolling down his bare chest. The feeling of the warm saltwater on his skin made a shiver run down his spine. It pained him to see his friend in such distress. But they both knew he had to do this, it was his destiny. "Armin." He breathed, a hand raking through his pale locks. He fought back tears, knowing if the other saw his sadness, he might not be able to handle it. "I need to do this." He said firmly, gently pulling away. He placed both palms on either side of the blonde boy's face. "I'll come find you, okay?" His breath fell over the other's face. He wanted desperately to crawl into bed with him, and curl up with his arms rightly around the other's waist. They could sleep for days, and sink deep into the earth's crust. The dirt would cover them in a warm blanket of vines, the world concealing them from the disgusting life that lay above ground.


Without thinking, the man pulled in his lips fallinknover the other's soft mouth. His stomach leaped into his throat, all nerves firing up in attempts to fight off the strange burning in his chest. What was he doing? This was his friend.


He pulled away quickly, stumbling back with wide eyes. "I--" he was at a loss of words.


"Don't die." Was all he said before he bolted out the door, nearly colliding with the Corporal.

 

[Mituna Captor]

A small squeal escaped Armin's lips.


What? Eren...? Why did you do that?


But it didn't matter, hadn't that been what he wanted all this time?


"EREN, YOU CANT JUST DO THAT AND RUN AWAY, PLEASE! COME BACK! DONT GO! ... Don't go..." Tears streamed down his face as his form was wracked with sobs, his lips tingled and he just wanted to run straight after Eren.


"PLEASE, EREN!" He screamed, his eyes wide and sparkling with tears.


"Eren..." He whispered, shutting his eyes and letting himself sob, confusion and sadness never did mix well, especially not for him. He loved Eren, with all his heart... But he was always just too shy and anxious to say, in fear of destroying their friendship. He bit his lip, trying to catch his breath and calm down.


"Love you... I love you..." He whispered after his friend.


But Eren was already gone.

 

[-.-.Lucifer.-.-]

The sound of his friend's cries after him brought tears to swell behind his lids. He tried hard to ignore them, grabbing the Corporal by the wrist. He lifted his other arm, hiding his eyes in the crook of his elbow while he tugged on Levi's arm, willing him to follow. They had to intercept Annie before she breached the wall, or worse... found his father.


Eren didn't want to explain his uncontrollable trembling, reaching between his teeth and spilling words from his lips to distract himself. "We need to hurry, I'm more than sure Annie has already killed the remaining cadets pursuing her." He croaked, stumbling out of the medical unit into the clutter of humans. He lowered his limb, skin stained with tears. Eren glanced back at Levi, eyes red and full of confusion. When his gaze fell along his captain's dark eyes, the burning in his chest began to swell. He gritted his teeth together, fighting back the urge to break down in Heichou's arms.


"We can't waste time." He spoke, vowels broken because of the lump in his throat. They continued on, his hand still clutching his wrist tightly as they weaved through the traffic.

 

[Mituna Captor]

Armin closed his eyes tightly as Eren left, tears running down his face and sobs still shaking his body.


Heichou looked at Eren, he noticed the boy was talking too fast, he looked up at the red eyes, Eren was about to cry.


"Eren..." He said gently, giving his back a gentle pat.


"Please don't be upset... I'm sure they'll both be fine... I... Yeah. They're gonna be fine..." Little did he know of Armin's anger and sadness because he hadn't seen the kiss. So he was rather bewildered as to why he'd been gripped by the wrist and dragged out so quickly.

 

[-.-.Lucifer.-.-]

The captain's soft words did nothing to calm his nerves. He whipped his head back, green eyes swelling with salt water once again. "I know they'll be fine. I just don't know if we will." He whispered, his heart constricting as he stared into Levi's dark hues. He turned his head sharply, picking up his speed before he had enough time to convince himself otherwise. "Do you believe in Love corporal?" He asked, words being taken by the wind as they weaved through warm bodies. He didn't know if he believed in Love. People were often ripped away from him before he could grow close. The faces of many soldiers flashed before his eyes, their features screwed up in fear, blood dripping from their lips. He gritted his teeth, wishing he could catch the words that spilled from his jaws, and eat them.

 

[Mituna Captor]

Armin sat up with a jolt. Whimpering as he stood up. His feet shuffled along and he broke into a agonisingly slow walk, but he was behind Eren and Levi soon enough, he carried on limping, tears streaming down his face.


Levi nodded.


"Of course I believe in love. I'm not that cold, you know." He said with a small smile.


Armin silently levelled his mouth with Eren's ear, clutching his side in pain.


He let out the loudest, most high pitched scream right down Eren's ear. Sobs escaping his throat.


"YOU THINK YOU CAN DO THAT?! KISS ME AND THEN JUST RUN AWAY!" He screamed, punching Eren's chest weakly. He was struggling to remain upright and so staggered where he stood and fell against the taller boy, sobbing hard.


"It was just to shut me up anyway wasn't it?" He whispered, digging his nails into his side.


"It... Hurts... So much." He whispered, banging his head against the other's chest.


"Stay with me... I don't want you to go..."

 

[-.-.Lucifer.-.-]

Eren stared at Levi for a few long moments, blankly. His hand was still grasped tightly around the Corporal's wrist, green eyes still. He didn't know why he'd asked the question, why it even bothered him if the answer had been "no".


He was so busy stuck in his own mind, the shout in his ear made him jump sharply, his arm ripping away from Heichou's. His eyes opened wide, dumbstruck and flabbergasted at the words that filled his ear. A high pitched ring bounced around in his head, his left ear muffled of all noise at that point.


Then the small pale fists were beating against his chest, and guilt welled under his tongue. "Armin... no... it's not like that." He breathed, trying hard to keep calm as the crying boy continued to tug on his heartstrings, suffocating the red organ. The small blows to his body eventually began to sting, and he crapped hold of both the blonde soldier's hands and pulled them tightly to his sternum. "Armin!" He yelled, his voice full of sharp knives and burning needles.


"Stop." He said quietly, testing his forehead against the other's. He glanced sideways at Levi, the look appologetic. "Armin, why did you follow me? You're injured... and bleeding" he said sadly as he pulled his body away from the soldier, seeing both of their garments covered in a large red stain. He then lifted him up crawling him close to his body with tenderness. "I kissed you because I wanted to. Not to shut you up." He breathed, but tears threatened to stain his cheeks. He didn't know why he'd kissed Armin. He had the urge.


"It was to say goodbye." He murmured, voice low.


"I might die." Then he motioned for Levi to follow once more. "If you don't heal, I'll never forgive myself. Please, just listen to me for once." His tone thickened, sternly, and he burrows his nose in his blonde hair,n taking in his scent. "I can't watch you if I'm scouting for Annie. And I can't protect you if I'm a titan." His mouth was watering as he spoke. Thick dark images of Armin's torn limbs churning in his Titan mouth making shivers run down his spine. He wondered what his blood taste like, stay the feeling of his bones crushing between his jaws would be. Wondered how loudly he'd scream if he took a bite, just a small one.


His unwanted fantasies made his stomach flip, and it took almost everything in him not to heave. "Please, listen to me." He pleaded once more, now standing outside of the hospital.

 

[Mituna Captor]

Eren's words confused, hurt and frustrated the smaller boy, making him struggle when He was lifted off the ground.


He touched his hand to his side and gasped slightly, his hand coming away, covered in blood.


"Gross." He muttered, closing his eyes and letting tears roll down his face.


"You can't die! We... We didn't see the oceans..." He whispered shakily, raising his bloody hand to trace Eren's lips softly, caking them in blood. He then shifted and Drew a small heart on the brown haired boy's cheek, sobs escaping his throat and making him cough and shake.


"I guess this is g-goodbye then..." He whispered, wrapping both arms around the other's neck and kissing him deeply and messily before pulling back.


"I love you." He whispered, his eyes fluttering closed as his breaths began to slow.