Brax
💯
Family
Knock, Knock, Knock
It hadn’t been a minute before the door slowly creaked open. Luca, having been resting for all of an hour tops, had not gotten the opportunity to see who it was that had been disturbing his rest. Tired eyes opened as wide as they could before he pushed himself up off the mattress. When he finally turned to see the guest who he had been forcefully receiving, he was not surprised to see a certain head covered in dreads closing the door behind him. The Italian got up from bed and made his way into the bathroom, where he turned on the faucet and splashed water onto his face. There was no way he was going to make it through the day with the proper amount of rest; it would most likely be delegated to the night time.
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” The teen asked as he took a seat in one of the two chairs that had been placed toward the side of the room.
The sound of water running was cut when Luca pushed the handle to the faucet downward. He wiped an open palm down the length of his face, slightly dragging his skin in the process as the man made his way out of the bathroom and took the seat opposite of his once-protege. The man sat in silence. Tre expected him to say something back but that moment didn’t occur. So, the boy decided to forgo any formalities and dive straight into the reason he had approached the ex-capo.
“Been havin’ these weird thoughts lately,” the boy started. “Like, what the fuck am I doin’? Am I gon’ live the rest of my life this way? I just feel down, man. Low. I ain’t felt this bad since I seen moms go. I’unno if I got the strength to keep doin’ this shit day in and day out, pretendin’ like it’s some worthwhile existence when my only purpose is to guard a lodge full of people I ain’t really feel like… I don't even know like that.”
“Welcome to the real world.” Luca replied. “Putting aside everything going on right now; what was your original purpose?” Tre was unable to respond to this question after a moment of deliberation. “The truth is, you never had a purpose. Like me, you were born a mistake. Unplanned. Still, you had a father that loved you very much and did whatever he could to make sure you were safe. I don’t think you remember anything from that time, but I was in the hospital waiting for you to be born. I’ve never seen your father happier in my entire life than when you came into the world. Now he’s gone. So is your mother. What do you want your purpose to be?”
Tre’s eyes averted from Luca’s face to the floor. He hung his head slightly as he searched for answers within the fabric of the carpet. Slowly, his face started to contort. Then tears began falling from his eyes as he lifted his hands to his face to cover his shame. Unsure of how to react, the Italian continued sitting there and watching. This was a conversation he had multiple times throughout the years, with others in his shoes and in Tre’s own. However, the mental anguish that Luca felt having to see Tre in pain was something that was inexplicable to even himself. The emotional mixture of sadness, mixed with his confusion of what was going on and his own frustration prompted Luca to remove the back of crushed-up oxies from his pocket. With his knife, he dove in - the same knife that had taken plenty of lives, drawn gallons of blood throughout the years. He brought the white powder up to his nose and took a sniff as Tre continued sobbing across from him.
“There’s no answer.” Luca said after a moment of silence between the two, pushing against the opposite nostril to snort up whatever substance had been left in his nose. Tre wiped his face, anger overtaking his features as he stood up and pushed the chair away. He made his way to the door in order to take his leave but was stopped when Luca stood up and reached a hand out to grab the back of his sweatshirt. "Your father wouldn't want you to feel this way."
“Let fuckin’ go of me man, you’re useless.” Tre grumbled, as he turned and tried to remove Luca’s grip from the fabric. In turn, the man pulled the boy in close to him before wrapping his arms around him. The ex-capo rested his chin against the top of Tre’s head as he held him. Flustered, Tre did his best to continue pushing off from Luca, cursing and shouting random obscenities in hopes to hurt the man’s feelings. But the Italian just kept holding on. Eventually Tre stopped fighting, instead pushing his face into Luca’s chest. The man felt the boy’s tears seeped through his shirt and dampen it. Still, he held on.
“You are not alone.” The man murmured. “It’s okay to be upset and afraid. None of us know what the future holds. We are all doing what we believe to be right. You might not know the meaning of your existence, but you still exist. Your life is the only thing of real value that you hold. Purpose is not something that we are handed down or gifted from being birthed. Rather, purpose is something that we generate. It’s intrinsic for you to find if you don’t want to continue feeling this way.” He let the boy go, placing a hand on the top of his head and looking down at him.
“It’s something that people struggle with every day. I still struggle with it. You may never find an answer. I really never did. It entirely depends on your motivation. We’re not in the best position right now, as much of an understatement as that is. That does not mean you cannot pave your own way to happiness. It just means you have to work harder.” Tre looked up at the man, lifting a sleeve to wipe his face while nodding.
“T-thank you fo-”
“I don’t want to hear it.” Luca stated plainly. “Go rest.” Tre continued looking at the man before nodding, turning away to grab the doorknob and walk out. Luca whistled as Tre made his way out the door. The boy looked back at him.
“Go to the barracks and sleep in a real bed.” Without response Tre closed the door behind him. Luca lifted both hands, running them through his hair and letting out an aggravated sigh as he crawled back up into bed and rested his head back on the pillow once more.