Guile
One Thousand Club
The Phantom heard Catherine's words echo softly through his head. He started to feel the familiar sting of salty tears streaming from his eyes and down onto his cheeks once again. I never meant to hurt you. He thought. I miss you and the kindness you've shown to me...but mostly...I just miss having someone around that meant something to me again - someone who didn't loathe me for a hideousness that I had no control over. He didn't know if Catherine could hear him or not, but the thoughts were running through his head anyway. They entwined with the long-ago memories of Christine and how he had turned her from him as well. Of all the memories that circled through his head, he knew of only one common denominator in all of his problems: him. It was his fault that things were going wrong in his life. It was his fault that people hated him, and his fault that he had no one to love or to be loved by. If I could go back in time and change things I would, but it's too late now. I would start with Christine...I wouldn't force her to stay with me; wouldn't make her chose between marrying me or the death of the Vicomte. He sat there, contemplating the past and all the things he could have done to change things for a better outcome. These thoughts filled his head for the better half of an hour. He had started with Christine and ended up thinking about the recent past and how he could have stopped Catherine from falling for him - which may have allowed them to be very close friends, almost like family, at this point in time. But it was all over now, he figured. There was no way he could change the past and he couldn't think of words to say or things to do to make up for the wrongs he had done. Thinking of all this, the Phantom didn't know if he would ever be able to bring himself up from as low a state as he was in now.
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