Realistic or Modern Just Breathe

[decadent-rider]

He just nodded and leaned back, trying to remain calm and gather himself but he started feeling really weird and they seemed to be taking a really long time so he got out the car, locking it, and used his crutch to get inside, finding them stood in a long line at the pharmacy and frowned some, taking another couple steps before descending into another coughing fit, this time a lot of blood coming up with it before he collapsed in the middle of the aisle, blacking out.

Bea frowned and shook her head, crying. “No! Daddy what’s wrong?!” She asked him, worried about him. “I don’t wanna see mommy like that anymore. Daddy I wanna go home!” She cried more and tried to get closer to him again but when he pulled a gun out of his waistband and pointed it at her she screamed and started running away, bumping into someone by accident.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Max frowned as they got in line for the pharmacy. She didn't expect it to be this crowded today and it worried her to keep Jon waiting. She looked at the isle when she heard Matthew yell for him and went wide eyed when she watched him fall "Shit!" She yelled before rushing over to him and helping get his head in her lap "Jon? Jon talk to me!"

Clay frowned as she kept pushing towards completely out of his right mind at the moment "I said to fucking leave Beatrice!" He yelled before drawing his gun and pointing it at her.

 

[decadent-rider]

He was in and out of consciousness and struggling to breathe, managing a groan of pain but nothing else as he heard people's voices in the distance including Matthew's and hers that he recognised but nothing else.

Bea was sobbing and shaking as she looked up at the person she'd run into, frowning when she saw it was a complete stranger but when she heard Giulia's voice calling for her she ran to her, hugging her sister tightly.

Giulia had run out after her, worried sick about what could happen to her but she'd seen it all, including Clay pulling his gun out. The person she'd run into by accident was Tomas. Giulia had contacted him about the fact their mom was so sick so he could come down if he wanted and now the two eldest were completely disgusted by their father, "I got you Bea, I got you." She coaxed her gently.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Clay put his gun away and continued to try and smoke his cigarette. He looked over at his two eldest shaking his head a bit as he put his head into the wall also seeing Bea terrified in her sister's arms "Fuck!" He yelled out slamming his head into the wall out of frustration.

Max frowned as quickly yelled for help whem she heard his breathing. People were calling 911 and the pharmacist was trying to help her the best he could. She was scared to death though and now for a fact did not want him to leave for New York.

 

[decadent-rider]

Giulia shook her head frowning "Tomas stop him... Dad stop!" She called to him, getting scared as well as he kept doing it until he seemed to knock himself out, "I'm calling our abuela to take the little ones.. Shit.. Go get one of the doctors or something." She told him quickly. The two of them had tried their best to reconnect over the past few months and it had been going well so far but she was worried about the younger ones with everythign else happening

Matthew was getting scared until the paramedics came to take his Dad and he held onto his Mom tightly, "Daddy's still sicky?" He asked her frowning, holding onto her tightly, "Mommy I don't want Daddy feeling sicky anymore." He told her.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Tomas frowned and rushed over looking at his dad and shakimg his head some "He is out cold..." he muttered before rushing in to get the doctors. The shock to finding his birth family was big on Tomas, to find that he had a twin as well was crazy to him. He wanted to know them instantly but it soon became clear that his father was nothing without his wife and could do nothing for himself it seemed. However, he did try to atleast keep up with his sister after they had met. He was happy to finally have a family again after his adoptive folks passed, but this was far from what he expected.

Max held Matthew back as the paramedics looked him over and gave a small nod "He is baby." She said quietly before she thanked the people who had helped and rushed to follow the ambulance out "I know sweetheart and I wish he wasn't sick anymore either."

 

[decadent-rider]

Giulia frowned, shaking her head as she quietly tried to comfort Bea. She stayed at the hospital that evening to stay with her mom but also to make sure she was there for when her Dad woke up, getting to his room early in the morning with coffee. She'd been sitting there for an hour when he finally came around, just glaring at him. "This is it. You've officiallt hit rock bottom Dad... You pulled a gun on your youngest daughter and knocked yourself out by bashing your head againsrt a brick wall all while high as a fucking kite on whatever fucking cocktial of drugs you've been taking..... So here is your ultimatum... Either you clean yourself up and work hard on being a father again, go stone cold sober for your kids.... Or you never see them or your wife again.... We never even tell you whether she lives or not. If you don't get clean we will all cut ties with you." She told him seriously.

Jon came to a few hours later, looking over at Max and frowning some, "What are we doing here?" He wheezed out, not looking at all happy at being stuck in another hospital bed.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Clay woke up the next morning and groaned softly. He took the coffee from Guillia and sighed heavily as he listened to her "Alright..." he whispered before taking a deep breath looking over at his clothing "I know this is alot...can you do me a favor? Burn those, get Tomas to give the gun to Coco. I'm going to leave town, go to a sober living place." He explained quietly hoping she would believe him

Max sighed softly and kissed his hand gently "Hey....you had a coughing fit and passed out. They think its some effects on your lungs." She said softly

 

[decadent-rider]

He groaned a little at that and shook his head, "I don't want more tests." He grumbled, "I don't want more needles." He told her frowning, trying to tug on her to bring her closer "Where's Matt?" He asked quietly.

Giulia pulled her coffee away from him. "This isn't yours.... Why do you think everything is always for you or about you? What's wrong with the one in town? You're gonna fuck off again for several months and the little ones are gonna be really confused." She muttered, shaking her head in frustrarion

 

[Forever6A7X]

Clay sighed heavily shaking his head some "The one in town is just a money pit of no help. I've tried it." He muttered running a hand over his face "I got money stashed away....it'll pay for a good program."

Max sighed heavily "I know babe, he is in the little day care they have here." She murmured softly stroking his cheek gently

 

[decadent-rider]

He leaned into her touch a little more and frowned. “How’s baby doing?” He asked her quietly.

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” She muttered shaking her head and walked out of the room, leaving him on his own.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Max smiled softly and placed his hand on her stomach "He is good, just kicking here and there." She said softly "We still need to pick out names."

Tomas looked over at his sister whem she came in and sighed heavily "How did he react?" He asked while holding his mother's hand as she slept.

 

[decadent-rider]

Jon nodded and frowned "I didn't want you still having to look after me this far in." He mumbled, a lot paler than he had been that morning and feeling shaky, just lifting his hand up towards her, "I'm scared I won't be around to meet them." He mumbled, rubbing his face and sighing heavily.

She shrugged and frowned, "Like he was expecting it... Like I'd told him we needed to go to the grocery store I.... He pointed a gun at Beatriz." She muttered, shaking her head, "I don't know what Mom will do if she gets through this but if she chooses to stay with him I'm not sticking around to look after everyone." She muttered, shaking her head.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Max frowned softly shaking her head some more "No baby don't talk like that. You'll meet him, and I'll be fine." She said before kissing him gently "I'm going to get a nurse okay?"

Tomas frowned more and shook his head some more "I don't know her well enough to say if she will stay or not. However, like you said, he pulled a gun on their kid. I wouldn't stay if my partner were to do that."

 

[decadent-rider]

He just nodded and lay back starting to feel a little nauseous while he waited for her to come back, his chest aching more too so he shut his eyes and gripped at the bed sheets.

She shook her head. “She’s stubborn. She is the best mom I could have asked for growing up and she loves her family more than anything. I know she regrets what happened with having to give you up…. But she also stubbornly loves him. And I think with needing extra help they won’t be able to stop from gravitating back to each other.” She explained.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Max frowned softly as she sat back down next to him rubbing her bumo slowly "A nurse will be here soon to give you some pain killers babe." She said as she watched him

Tomas gave a small nod and sighed heavily "Is there anything I can do to help? I can watch the kids on nights I'm not at the garage." He said softly wanting to help his twin out as much as he could when he saw the stress littering her face

 

[decadent-rider]

He frowned and managed to look over at her again frowning and managed a nod until the nurse came in to look him over, having him pull the gown down and for the first time since the shooting it let max see just how weight he’d lost.

She nodded. “You should just come over first. Bea needs to know you before you can watch them.” She told him quietly.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Max went a bit wide eyed when she could just about see his ribs once she pulled his gown down. He had been so closed off as of late she hadn't been able to full see the weight loss. Especially when he covered up with long sleeves and baggy shirts.

Tomas gave a small nod and ran a hand over his face "Well just let me know when okay? If its now thats great, if you want to wait then thats okay too." He murmured before he stood up and pulled his sister into a tight hug.

 

[decadent-rider]

He followed instructions closely as possible until she told him to take a deep breath in and he couldn’t hold it, descending quickly into another coughing fit, spitting up more blood down his chin again and laying back panting as he tried to catch his breath again.

it was another two weeks before carmen woke up and a further month before she was able to go home, she’d been lucky for once and the damage had been reversible but she was still exhausted and had trouble walking for any length of time so when the doorbell rang while she was home alone she had to call for them to hold on, taking a couple minutes to get to the door and finally got it open in time to see Clay about to walk away. Giulia had told her everything that had happened but they hadn’t heard a word from him since. “Hey…”

 

[Forever6A7X]

Max frowned and quickly wiped his chin of the blood before turning to look at the nurse worriedly "Is there something going wrong with his lungs?"

Clay looked at the front door debating if he should really do this or not. He had left town after they released him and got clean like he said but his guilt was still weighing heavy on him. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door a few times not hearing Carmen on the other side. He went to leave but turned his head when he heard the door open "Hey..." he said softly turning full to look at her.

 

[decadent-rider]

She frowned some and watched him, "Come in... we need to talk." She muttered, trying her best to talk as smoothly as possible but these days it took a lot more out of her for her brain and speech to connect.

His nurse shook her head, "I don't know, I'll page his doctor to come check him over some more... Mr. Bernthal?" She frowned as he started shaking badly, ending up in a seizure.

 

[Forever6A7X]

Clay gave a small nod as he walked inside taking deep breaths. He sat down with her and ran a hand through his hair watching her "How are you doing?"

Max went wide eyed as he started to seize up and quickly got out to give the nurses and doctors room to work

 

[decadent-rider]

She frowned and shook her head, watching him, "No... No... You don't get.... to ask that.... You want to... to tell me... why you pulled a gun... on our daughter?!" She snapped at him.

He came out of it after only a couple of minutes but he was disoriented and panicking, looking around for a familiar place but he couldn't even remember how he'd ended up in there to begin with so he was freaking out more than a little bit

 

[Forever6A7X]

Clay sighed heavily and nodded a bit "Fair enough. Honestly? I was coked out, tweaking hard, and needed some air. Doesn't excuse my actions though. Look I've been a piece of shit since after we lost the baby, hell probably even before that. I can't change what I did, all I can do is apologize sincerely and move forward. I am sorry Carmen, I'm sorry for how I treated you and our children. Sorry for thinking of only myself in our family's most dire time of need. I want to change that though, I'm clean now, I'm out of the club, and I want to be here for all of you if you'll let me be there." he explained truthfully to her.

Max frowned when he heard the nurses getting a bit louder and asking him to calm down. She rushed to the door and tried to get inside "Whats happening? Let me see my husband please!" she begged hearing how scared he sounded when he started yelling.

 

[decadent-rider]

He wasn’t recognising anyone and he couldn’t remember why he was there, in full blown panic especially when they kept trying to hold him down until he went into another seizure and they removed her from the doorway so they could get in and out. “Ma’am we need you to wait out here. We will collect you when we can. You’re in the way right now.” One of the nurses told her firmly.

She shook her head some. “I can’t believe I’m doing even this…. But I want you to come home. You have one last chance to oroce to me.. and the kids… that you should be in our lives…. If you can’t sort yourself out. Then that’s it.”