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A homestuck fanventure

IC: Uh, okay yeah...being alive is good. I lke being alive. And I'll be sure to spam seth to get him to answer me.


intellectualCynical [ IC ] ceased pestering hyperactivePhantom


-----------------------------


intellectualCynical [ IC ] began pestering comicalPandemonium [ CP ]


IC: Seth you need to build up my house to a gate thing okay? Although you probably already know that.


IC: Mr. I-know-everything-about-this-game.



IC: Funny how you were so interested in my gett
ing into the game, now I'm here, and the spectrum of people who listen to me has been reduced to a group of imps who seem to think my panties look more fashionable when they're worn as hats.


CP: oh hey


IC: Hi


CP: hi


CP: you know what i forgot to tell you



CP: you need to prototype the orb



IC: You mean this circular floating thing that's been blinking annoyingly at me since I arrived here?


CP: yeah


CP: that would be what an orb izzy



IC: Don't talk to me like I'm stupid.


IC: How do I prototype it?



CP: shove something into it


IC: Anything?


CP: anything


CP: just make it touch something you can prototype it with anything



IC: Does that include myself?


CP: oh god


CP: dont do that


IC: Why not?


CP: youre already really annoying in your human form


CP: no offense tho



CP: but the last thing we need is a viciously bright glowing version of you merged with lord knows what floating around while we try to play this game



IC: Darn.


CP: but yeah i'll work on gettin u to the gate and you prototype


CP: srsly tho if you prototype yourself i'll throw a fridge at you or something



CP: dont test me i can totally do that



IC: Okay, okay. I understand. No self prototyping.


CP: k


CP: i'll start building now






Seth put his Iphone in his pocket and got on his computer which still displayed a view of Isabella's house on the screen. From there he tried copying a section of the wall that made up Isabella's apartment building over an over to make stairs but that cost way too much grist, so he settled on repeatedly copying a ladder that had been leaning against one wall in the apartment.
 
Skye looked at her computer, waiting for Axis to say something, while she watched Seth on his own computer, creating god knows how many ladders in Isabella's apartment. A pesterlog appeared, which she expected would suddenly blow up into lines of red text. However, it looked more like a dark green, typed by someone who seemed to be a bit too excited.


hyperactivePhantom [HP] began trolling occupiedGenius [OG]





HP: hI!!!!!!


HP: I had!! Capslock still on!



HP: Are you and! The other monkey things!!! In the game?



HP: That squirrel!! Outside your window! Said that! You're a monkey thing!



HP: That could! Be a band name!!!!



HP: OG AND THE MONKEY THINGS



OG: what


OG: oh god



OG: your nota fuckign 'alien' are you?



HP: No!


HP: You are!



HP: Unless you!! Count my wings and talons! As alien things!



OG: oh nad now your sayign you have talons and wings


HP: Yep! None of the others do!! But I prototyped my kernalsprite with myself, and a cat bird!! Which means that, when my dreamself woke up, and killed himself! We both fused together, into a magical dude with equally magical pjs! And cat bird stuff!


HP: I can do!! Planty things!



OG: uhm


OG: what



OG: wait a fuckign minute how do yuo know thers a squirel outside my winodw?



HP: I am the Heir of Life! It's like spideysense!


HP: That movies like! 1000 sweeps old!!



OG: thats not


OG: that desritpive?



HP: I tried to sense if there! Was anything not a troll in your vicinity! And I found you and something else!! So I talked to him and he said he was a squirrel! And he was kind of bored! So he was sitting there! Eating an acorn on that tree outside your window!


OG: okay i have no idae how you figurde that out but


OG: not convicned yuor an alien



OG: 'monkey thign' is fucking basic



HP: I don't really know the! Specifics! But I could always go full telepathy!!


OG: 'full telepahty'?


HP: I am!! A limeblood! So I have! Really powerful psychic powers!! But my biggest and main one! Is the ability to talk verbally or telepathically!!! To any non-troll being!!


HP: Jessica is one of my friends!! She's a sunflower!



OG: uh


OG: yeahh



OG: you guys suck at trollign



OG: not convinecd






Skye looked at the screen, waiting for the "alien" to say something else. Nothing came.


Hi!!!


She jumped. What the fuck just said 'Hi'?


<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-55.png.93bb9b9e5d60283937b8d340bf8fe00d.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70548" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-55.png.93bb9b9e5d60283937b8d340bf8fe00d.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p> You DO look like a monkey! But your brownish looking! <p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-56.png.50968c5a9c9fb9d1ada054ff5421fad6.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70549" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-56.png.50968c5a9c9fb9d1ada054ff5421fad6.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>


<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-53.png.1adc42cf0aff51cf06872196780a2e5f.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70546" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-53.png.1adc42cf0aff51cf06872196780a2e5f.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p> Are you a bronzeblood monkey?!! <p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-54.png.0c53288695f377b5c88988d556604e9e.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70547" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-54.png.0c53288695f377b5c88988d556604e9e.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>



SKYE: uhhh


<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-50.png.e64be2009a48618bbf07579ca8a70d68.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70544" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-50.png.e64be2009a48618bbf07579ca8a70d68.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>
I said I was! Gonna go!! Full telepathy! <p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-51.png.6bed0487b50b59b691bff3d8953e1d7f.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70545" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-51.png.6bed0487b50b59b691bff3d8953e1d7f.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>


SKYE: waita fuckign minute


SKYE: your actualy an alien?



<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-48.png.6401c8abc9cfb8cac1e8eeb50c2f8601.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70542" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-48.png.6401c8abc9cfb8cac1e8eeb50c2f8601.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>
I am not a human! <p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-49.png.ca6c9e0bf01de22917cc0c6b48d2e9b3.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70543" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-20-49.png.ca6c9e0bf01de22917cc0c6b48d2e9b3.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>


-------------------------------------


Aurant had wanted to continue this conversation, however due to rpnation's 10 image-per-post limit, this would not work. Instead, Myrtac and Dabala become relevant by having a pesterlog.






cheezitDuoz [CD] began trolling cheezitDuoz [CD]


CD: O-+ That's honestly never gonna get old. +-O



CD: O+ What isn't?



CD: O-+ Our chumhandl
e! Not only is it funny in itself, but whenever we troll eachother? Golden. +-O


CD: O+ Oh! I can agree! Although, I forgot, when was it that we thought it up?


CD: O-+ Hmm, I can't put my finger on it either. +-O



CD: O+ Oh well!
<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-23-48.png.2d688a186459f51e41d1c0a484b8d112.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70550" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-23-48.png.2d688a186459f51e41d1c0a484b8d112.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p><p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-24-55.png.70a30ce8b37cc56f8f9c4138b1acc3d9.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70551" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_10-24-55.png.70a30ce8b37cc56f8f9c4138b1acc3d9.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>



















 

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Seth felt his phone buzzing in his pocket and took it out to reveal a strange green pesterlog in which a random stranger chirped and mewed at him. He decided to go along with it and question it later.


CP: right on dude


CP: chirp chirp



CP: meowww



CP: and all that stuff
 
HP: Sorry!!


HP: I got! Excited! When I godtiered!!



HP: Right now I'm!! Talking to one of the other humans!



HP: SKRAW



HP: That was an! Instinct!



HP: But hi!!!!!
 
CP: wait, you godtiered?


CP: sweet! that's gotta be fun



CP: i hope i godtier soon.



CP: im getting my friend's house built up



CP: and then my other friend will build on mine



CP: and we'll all hopefully godtier soon



CP: and itll be tho coolest shit ever
 
HP: I'm the first! To godtier in my group!!


HP: But that was!! Because I had to!



HP: Or else I'd still! Be a ghost!



HP: Its cool though! I have wings! And cool-ass claws!



HP: And I already! Had fangs, all trolls do, but! Mine look like cat fangs now!



HP: I don't! Think this happens to! Most godtiers though!



HP: Only the lucky one!
:)
 
HP: You're gonna look like a girl!


HP: But not so much! As the Witch of Heart will!



HP: You'll have almost! A dress on!



HP: But he will! Be stuck with a dress! Not to mention slippers and tights!



HP: I think that! Both classes were originally! Female only!



HP: But I guess humans! Are an exception!



Aurant proceeds to kind of giggle a bit behind the screen, imagining a human, like what Skye looked like, but not a girl but still wearing a Maid of Breath outfit.
 
CP: oh ok


CP: its not like i havent worn girls clothes before



CP: it probably wont bother me much



CP: wait don't tell anyone i said that



CP: tell everyone i hate being in a comfortable cute girly godtier outfit



CP: nobody shall know
 
HP: Pff!


HP: I won't! Tell anyone~!



HP: That's! Cute though!






Aurant sat on a throne he had made out of vines on his planet, looking at the iGrub he had been typing on. All of the consorts on the trolls' planets were long extinct, although Aurant had a few light blue sabertooths roaming a village, that the heir had made out of oddly positioned trees tied together in the shapes of buildings. Fittingly, Selini's planet had some of her consorts, purple dodo birds, alive as well.
 
CP: thanks


CP: ok well



CP: ill pester my friend and tell her im done building my other friends house



CP: i guess ill see you soon then



CP: or maybe sometime in the near future



CP: you seem cool



 

HP: You seem! Cool too!


HP: I think you're!! My favorite of the humans, actually!!



HP: But I! Believe I should!! Leave as well!



HP: I need to! Prepare to confront! My denizen!!!



HP: But I agree that!! We should talk again soon!





Promptly forgetting to close the window, he put the iGrub off to the side, looking at the planet below him. His vine throne was very high up, so that he could see far and wide. When he had revived some of the consorts shortly after godtiering, it seems they took him as the new king of them and their planet, through a weird cat-prophecy that, fittingly, had the one who restores Life to the planet, be the Heir to the throne. He looked up at the sky, which was dappled with clusters of stars, each one being a small sort of glowing moon to the main planet.


It was irrelevant, however, he needed to fight his denizen. The rest of the trolls had entered the game, although the Heir and Bard were the only two far enough to have began their quest to kill their denizen. Aurant took out his flail, and flew over to the Alchemizer. He decided to do two things:



1. Turn the flail into a plant.



2. Make it fucking huge.



He made a large, spiked vine grow out of the ground, before causing the roots to wither away, making the remaining part flop onto the ground as a captchaloguable item. He did just that, before alchemizing the two objects together.



Flail-ower || Vine = Magikarpoaceae used Flail



Now with a flail twice as big, he somehow managed to lift it; Any larger and he wouldn't be able to pick it up like this. He had been on this task, to battle his denizen, for a while now; He had previously been grinding imps for as much grist as possible for this alchemization quest. Best to test it.



This was his excuse to fly away and murder a bunch of ogres, however each one exploded into grist upon being turned into a pile of imp guts, of which would be about to disappear into the endless imp
gut void. This venture almost half-way paid back the grist he had spent on the flail in itself; It wouldn't take long for it to be able to repay its price in fruit gushers and imp guts. Of course, this is assuming that Selini does not decide to build some random huge thing that takes half of all his grist. Like that'd happen, though.


Later, Selini decided to build some random huge thing that takes half of all his grist.



<p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_22-49-38.png.d06266b0335f731ec85db6a5b701402a.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70656" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_22-49-38.png.d06266b0335f731ec85db6a5b701402a.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>
What the fuck! Is an Intellibeam Laserstation!? Why did!! Selini make one?! <p><a href="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_22-50-20.png.a733b6206f3003d45cb34e61a24b4598.png" class="ipsAttachLink ipsAttachLink_image"><img data-fileid="70657" src="<fileStore.core_Attachment>/monthly_2015_08/upload_2015-8-22_22-50-20.png.a733b6206f3003d45cb34e61a24b4598.png" class="ipsImage ipsImage_thumbnailed" alt=""></a></p>




No clue, his flail responded.


Aurant just sort of stood there and stared at it. Then it started sort of floating around, poking at shit. Aurant assumed Selini was trying to figure out what the fuck this piece of crap is used for. He waited a moment, keeping his eyes locked onto the piece of shit machine like a cat watching its prey, before literally pouncing on it. He positioned himself on it so that he was sitting on it.



It froze for a second like Selini was kind of confused as to what to do now that there was a troll sitting on the piece of shit, but she returned to floating the thing around and poking at shit while Aurant sat on it happily, like he was riding on it. While he sat he kind of contemplated how Selini is alive to be poking at shit. Giving Sagara Asphyx full power over Selini Katrir's entire game, and henceforth survival, and also the full ability to hit her with a load gaper, may not have been his brightest idea. He shrugged it off. She's not dead so who gives a shit if she probably almost did, it wasn't like he was being reckless or anything.



Totally not, who would assume that he was being reckless?



Surely not any sophisticated troll like himself would have thought such a thing.



Surely.



After contemplating his reckless decision, Selini appeared to have given up with the Intellibitch Laserstashit, so he got off of that piece of shit and decided to make more sabertooths.



After a quick moment he set to preen his wings, he promptly fluffified and flew off to the sabertooth village, which he liked to call Kitty City.



"
Welcome to Kitty City" said a sign that was also a living tree, like the buildings of the village were. The sign was written in his own shitty handwriting, further reminding him why not to attempt to write after not writing anything for 1,000 sweeps. He just liked how the name rhymed, and thought it sounded cute.


After considering the shitty sign, he flew further into the village, near where his huge-ass vine throne was, and between all of the shitty tree buildings, some of which had moss on it.



It appeared that some moss had taken a lichen to a tree.



Aurant stood there and kind of giggled like an idiot for a bit, because that pun was so great and not stolen from a certain videogame about dragons, like, at all. Some of the sabertooths sort of stood around and stared at him like he was an idiot. He stopped, and they all just sort of awkwardly stood around. Aurant decided to break the silence by making some of the sabertooths perform mitosis, henceforth becoming two sabertooths. After the original sabertooths sort of shook off that weird feeling of having divided, they greeted the new sabertooths, and they all had a huge cat party.



He enjoyed being the king of these glorious kitties, and this was his Kingidium.



He mentally did a sort of double pistols and a wink at the above sentence, because hell yeah plants.



He did a stupid dance with the sabertooths. This was a good day.



He did not, however, know that this would not last. Not for him, and not for anyone else who's playing this game.



No one knew this.



Only the Seer knew of the dark future that she and her friends would have to face.





 

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Isabella's POV:


She climbed the hundreds of ladders that seth had stacked on top of each other in order for her to get to the gate. Why did he have to do that? How was this ladder still standing? Why did she have to climb up so much?? It would probably help for if there were a set of stairs available or maybe even an elevator. But no, she'd been climbing aimlessly for who knows how long. Finally she reached the gate and looked around, seeing lots of mountains and springs ahead of her. She figured she might as well explore a little bit, and she did so while befriending the consorts, pink and white bunnies, who showed her around the planet and made her a necklace out of grass and flowers. A few unproductive hours where spent playing with said bunnies because bunnies are cute and fluffy and also bunnies.
 

Alayli didn't know why. She knew how, when, where, who.. But she didn't know why. She knew she should have accepted it already. A good time player knows the inevitable, and she even saw it before it happened. No one listened, and now look what's happened.

She didn't move from her spot on the floor, however she glanced around the room, the walls painted in red, brown, yellow, green, blue, and pink. The corpses on the floor were covered in those colors, too. She knew how, everyone was covered in slices, including herself. She knew when, they'd been on the meteor for a little under a sweep. She knew where, it was the main room everyone tended to hang around in, the one with a ton of computers. She knew who.. She knew who was dead, and who caused that. She knew this in two ways:

The obvious lack of any violet on the walls, and her having seen, first-hand, who had done it. There was enough blood draining out of her to prove it. She looked around at her immediate vicinity, the floor and wall being stained in jade. She had a strange blood color, even for jadebloods, one of the rarest castes next to fuschia. Her color was ever so slightly brown, and almost mutant bright. Luckily, her color hadn't been too strange, although she always felt that she was close to being culled for more reasons than one. She had a strange blood color and a strange appearance, her formerly white hair now stained with her own gore.

She sighed, wondering what would have prevented this timeline. She looked at her outfit-- Red, with a gear symbol, the clothes themselves being robes --and decided that this was probably going to happen no matter what she did. This was not the alpha timeline, she assumed. She only wish her death would be soon, as she was getting tired of how much bleeding out hurt. She would cull herself, but she couldn't really move her arms that well. She wondered how many other doomed timelines there were, and which ones were doomed by the same bard. She assumed it'd be a lot, bards seem to be very unpredictable.

In her own boredom, she glanced around the room again. Eirian's blood did come as a curiosity to her, along with the rest of her appearance.. Even herself seemed to be a normal troll in comparison. She found it more interesting than weird, though. She thought that Velicia's horn was definitely.. Different. She thought the minimum was two horns, and the maximum four. The more you know. She took notice that Kalemi's many arms seemed to be gone or cut in half, with only her two normal arms being mostly intact. Alayli didn't know what he'd do with those, although considering he managed to build his strife specibus, he might have a use for it..

She only knew now, that, thinking seemed too hard. She was feeling very, very light headed. She probably had only a few more seconds to live before she bled out. That seemed okay. She was only one of an infinite amount of her in an infinite amount of timelines. She was irrelevant. She breathed out one last time, closing her eyes.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Alayli jerked up from her desk, looking around at her hive and her outfit, consisting of a black crop top, equally black shorts, round sunglasses, and skye blue sandals. She sighed, rubbing her eyes. She knew she should go back to sleeping in sopor slime, but she found that her dreams were too interesting. Most trolls had dreams of misfortune towards themselves and their friends, she was not an exception, however all of her dreams seemed to interlock. Always, most of her friends, usually including her, were wearing bright outfits with strange symbols, the same outfit for each of them every time. In each one, she seemed to have a strange knowledge about the past and future that surpassed herself, and in each one, she was on a strange planet or a meteor in space.

She sat up in her seat, looking around her hive. It seemed to be around four in the morning, and most of her friends seemed awake, judging by who was online and who wasn't.

The jadeblood checked the Sgrub download she'd started before having fallen asleep, and seen it was almost finished. She stretched, yawning, before the download finished and it automatically started on her husktop. The game loaded, before a screen opened of a troll's hive. Sagara's. She sighed slightly frusturatedly, before opening a Trollian tab.​
 
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Meanwhile, a young troll girl named Velica rode her unicorn lusus through the night. She loved feeling the wind blow through her short hair and the sound of her lusii's hooves hitting the hard alternian ground as they galloped towards her barn hive after a long day of exploring. As soon as she got there she dismounted and led her lusus into the barn then climbed up to the barn loft she used as a bedroom and plopped down on a pile of soft blankets which she used for a bed. She sighed and rolled on her side and saw that her trolldroid which lay on the floor beside her blanket pile was flashing with a notification that someone had pestered her. She unlocked her phone, opened chumdroid and began trolling roboticPianist.


flyingUnicorn [FU] began trolling roboticPianist [RP]


FU: 。.:*・°☆Hey! WIll you be playIng that game everyone Is talkIng about, sgrub?
 
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RP: # Yes!~ I'm jus♪ abou♪ ♪o s♪ar♪ ♪he download!~ #




She sat in front of her computer, using two of her.. "Extra" arms to type, her two original arms and the two extras left idling while she looked at the screen. She was a troll with long, straight hair tied back in pigtails, the ties being yellow plastic, while wearing a black shortsleeve shirt with a black midiskirt, and curved horns that resembled a bass clef.


Her four extra robotic arms, which were attached to her back, needed power somehow. She decided it'd be better to just use fireflies as solar panels. So there was four of them, floating above her horns, two over each horn. The only downside was that to charge, the fireflies needed light. Since she was not planning on going blind or getting sunburns, there she was, sitting in her brightly lit hive.



It was a chore adjusting her eyes to the light every morning, but she new that her robot arms looking fucking badass and she did not want to not have cyborg arms. She couldn't play her music without them, anyway.



Not to mention, her lusus didn't care about the lighting. Her lusus was blind as a bat, and this was very literal. Given her lusus's sensitive hearing, however, she could only fully play her music when her lusus was hunting. This didn't mean she never played any music, however, but softer types of music were what she played on her piano when her lusus was around, since she had found that her lusus liked that type of music.



She liked that music, too.



Speaking of her lusus, she wondered where she was. She hopped out of her seat and went into the other rooms. The kitchen was empty. So was the living room. In her living room-- which was covered in gears, wires, oil, circuits, and the occasional piano key --she walked upstairs to the top of the building, which was a very small house on the edge of her city. She would have lived in an apartment hive, although slamming piano keys loudly at a hundred mph daily would have annoyed the others, she presumed. She saw her lusus, who was a large bat a bit smaller than she was, laying on top, sleeping. Kalemi remembered that her lusus had went out last night. She then remembered that her lusus hadn't returned.



Quietly cursing herself for being so forgetful, she decided her lusus must have been tired and returning from a hunt, but fell asleep before entering the hive. She gently picked up her lusus in her four extra arms, before quietly going back downstairs. she placed her lusus on the couch, wondering how tired she must have been, before quietly uttering,
day, mom, and returning upstairs to her computer.
 
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