Fandom Tale of Two Survivors { The Last of Us 1x1 with icedthemoon }

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Nate bit his lower lip as he considered how to answer. Was it fair to bring the mood down like this? Of course not. He knew better than that. He could not be the reason that everything was ruined after just a day. “It’s nothing. I’m fine. Don’t worry. We’re focused on you and your injury. And your recovery.”

His grip on the rag slipped a little, and he had to lean back to readjust. “Oh. I’m so sorry! Did I hurt you?” He groaned as he tried to fix it before sighing as he finished. “I shouldn’t have dragged you into this. Infected and hunters in a single day. And you’ve already been through so much.” He sucked in a deep breath, trying not to let this sudden emotion overwhelm him. It was definitely silly for him to feel like this, but he could not deny it. Alex did not deserve this.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

He had a feeling that Nate wasn't being truthful, but he didn't have any way to know if he was right or not. He looked over at Nate when he talked. "I don't think you're fine" He said softly, looking away. He looked down at his lap, before he felt the rag slip. He felt the loss of the relaxing coolness before it returned a moment later. He heard Nate apologize and Alex shook his head. "No, I'm fine. Promise" Alex said, which he was.

His head turned to look at Nate a second later when he heard the man talking. "You didn't drag me into anything, I said I'd help you. Hunters and infected aren't half as bad. I, My group had another group that we were always fighting. These guys were worse than the stories I'd heard of FEDRA. After dealing with them, this is nothing." Alex said, looking at his hands that were currently resting in his lap. He heard Nate take a deep breath and he didn't know what to do. He sighed, taking one of his hands and placed it on the man's knee. "I chose to come with you, don't beat yourself up because we've had a run of bad luck in the last 24 hours" Alex told him. He had nothing else he could say, but he hoped it worked. He was used to happy and optimistic Nate, not sad unhappy Nate.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Was it though? Was this okay? Was this really fine? Because it did not feel like it was fine. But Alex was right. He needed to get it together. If he was falling apart this far into their journey, how was he possibly going to make it for another month? Maybe it was the stress of the hunters. That was not a particularly bad fight, he certainly had been through worse, but it was unexpected and did not go the way they wanted. Between Alex’s injury and the combat, neither of them were happy about that.

Nate looked down at the hand on his knee. It felt warm, like it was emanating support. After one whole day. That was kind of amazing. He placed his own hand on top of Alex’s and squeezed. With a smile, a genuine but smaller one, he finally was able to speak again. “Thank you. I really appreciate you doing that. I really do. And even though I can’t keep you safe, I can put you back together.”
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Alex had been thinking about how everything had gone since the two of them started together. There was no way they'd make it any further if they didn't make sure that they communicated. It was a necessity to survival. Alex had never trusted anyone really, not even his family after they had turned their backs on him. He had found, within the last 24 hours that he'd put more trust in Nate than he'd thought. His eyes were searching the woods, but he could feel his body trying to tell him to rest. He shifted himself slightly, ending up closer to Nate than he'd intended.

His eyes dropped to his hand when he felt a warmth on top of it. Nate had covered his hand and squeezed. That feeling sent warmth, like a small hug, through his body. His eyes traveled up to look at Nate to see a genuine smile on his face. Alex found himself sending a shy smile back. "You're welcome. I mean every word. I'd chose to come with you even if I knew what was coming. And it's because I know I have someone I can trust to put me back together which I appreciate." He said, twisting his hand so it was basically trying to hold onto Nates and squeezed back. "I think I need to lay down, otherwise I'm gonna fall asleep sitting up and end up on your shoulder" Alex said with a little laugh. He reached for his pack to pull out his blanket to use as a pillow, ready to fall asleep right there. Between having Nate beside him and the cool rag on his wound, his body was trying to force him to rest.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

For reasons he could not explain, Alex’s words and actions meant so much more than he thought that they should. It reminded him of how he used to feel with his closest friends and the safety and reassurance of his mother. That was both comforting and a bit confusing.

“Hey, why don’t you use my sleeping bag? It may be a little more comfortable for you with your injury.” He pulled the roll from its straps on the bag and flipped it out with a gesture. “I’m not tired, and I can keep watch. Here.” He pulled out his water and reapplied it to the rag before pressing it back on Alex.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

He looked over at Nate when the man offered his sleeping bag for Alex to use. "If you're sure" He said hesitantly. Alex reluctantly had let go of Nate's knee a few moments prior and he shifted so that he was laying on the sleeping bag, on his side. "Are you gonna hold that rag on my wound while I sleep and keep watch?" Alex asked with a smile on his face.

"Because, I really won't mind that" He added, though he could feel himself falling asleep. The cool rag on his bag was soothing, and he trusted Nate with his life. He didn't hear much else as his eyes closed, his body taking the time to rest.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Nate moved to sit on the ground beside Alex, hand still firmly pressed on his back to keep the rag there. “I certainly am,” he answered though he could tell that Alex was already falling asleep. “I certainly am,” he repeated as he looked out into the trees, listening to the sounds of the wind and the world. The world was such a wonderful place when it was not overrun with the dead and those who wished death on others. When all of that negativity went away, he could remember what he loved about everything. He could remember why he was doing this. He was trying to find people who believed in that same peace. He was working this hard to find the connection to a better way of life. If the old world could live in harmony then they could rebuild that. They just had to get there first.

As he sat there, watching, he found himself distracted by the sleeping companion, the rag was still wet but no longer held the coolness of when it was freshly drenched. He briefly pulled it away to check on the injury. The swelling had fallen some, which was an incredibly good sign. Real bad bruise it was. That was the best scenario. The colors were terrible, and if he knew he was lucky that this kind of thing did not bother him. He traced a finger over the nastier edges where it once was open. It was healing relatively well all things considered. If they could keep it from opening a little while longer, he had hope that it would only get better from there. He replaced the rag, unsure how helpful it was now but still wanting to do something to aid in the healing, and continued his watch as the hours went by.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Alex had been sleeping rather peacefully, the hours passing by until he started dreaming. Faces of his family, his friends and his mentor flashing through his mind. Calling him traitor, abandoner, failure and saying that he'd get Nate killed or himself killed. Alex felt a whimper escape his throat as he tried to make the voices go away. He hadn't had a nightmare in months, but he'd also never really felt comfortable enough to sleep for long. He had been asleep for hours, but suddenly he tried to shift onto his stomach, hiding his face in the sleeping bag, hoping that he could get the voices to stop.

He didn't know what to do about the nightmare, there was no way out of it. The faces rotating around him, as he felt himself curl up inside his mind. He was crying in his mind but he hadn't realized that the tears were falling on his face. He didn't know how long he was in this nightmare and that scared him just as much if not more than being in the nightmare. Would he ever wake up?​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

The hours passed, and though he was becoming more and more tired, he continued to watch as he promised. He occasionally allowed himself to close his eyes and rest, filling sitting up in almost a meditation, as long as his mind did not wander from listening to the world around them. Then, after a while, he would go back to scanning the forest. Though it seemed unlikely that another attack could happen, he did not want to take that chance.

The sounds of whimpering pulled him out of one of his meditative moments. He opened his eyes quickly, searching for the source of the noise. Soon, his attention fell to Alex as he attempted to roll away. Was that him making those sad sounds? Was he okay? Was he in pain? oh, was he crying? The tears were shocking, and though Nate could not tell exactly the cause, he knew that he absolutely could not let that continue.

“Alex? Hey, Alex.” He patted him softly at first but as the agony continued, Nate bent over him, one hand on Alex’s shoulder to attempt to roll him back on his side so that he could face him better. “Alex, wake up.” He patted his shoulder firmer now, jerking him a little in an attempt to startle the brain and body awake but not be so much as to scare him he hoped. “It’s just a dream. Unless of course you’re in pain, in which case I still need you to wake up.”
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[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Alex kept seeing the faces whirling around, whispering how he wasn't good enough or was a traitor to the group. He felt a hand on his shoulder, a jerking motion that had never happened in his nightmares before. He heard Nate's voice filtering in and his eyes blinked open. "N- Nate?" He had rolled over onto his side when Nate had tried to roll him earlier. "W- What happened?" Alex wasn't sure if he'd had nightmare, though pieces of it was still floating in his brain. "Oh no, I had another nightmare didn't I?" He asked.

The nightmare started to return to his mind's eye, replaying every little detail to him. "I need a distraction, can you talk about anything?" He asked Nate, he needed something to focus on, anything to keep him from the nightmare that kept trying to resurface while he was awake. ​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Another nightmare? Was this something Alex had often? Nate wanted to ask if this were so and what the nightmares were about, but he was not sure this was the appropriate time for that? He hated that his friend had nightmares. Something so awful roiled through his mind that he made him cry in his sleep. That must have been awful.

Distraction. He could probably distract him. But with what? He did not have time to sit here and think about it. He just needed to talk.

“Did you know that I’m mostly blind?” It was a random question that came to him mind. He felt like this was a reasonable thing to be distracting. And it was the only thing he could think of. “Since I was little really. I have never been able to see like everyone else. When I was little, my mom told me that I needed glasses. ‘What are glasses?’ I asked her. She told me they were these things people use to wear for their eyes so that it magnified everything a little better. ‘That’s crazy!’ I told her. ‘No one we know wears those.’ Which was true since they aren’t so much made anymore. But then we were traveling and we found a pair. They were way too big, ungodly bulky, but they helped. Immensely even. I could almost see right. And no one else had any, so I felt mighty special.” He paused for a laugh. “Now, as my eyes get worse, it’s hard to find these since the world has been pilfered and destroyed. So, if we ever break or lose these, we will be lucky if I can even see what’s right in front of me.”

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[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

As Nate began talking, Alex was paying rapt attention. He had been wondering what those things were on Nate's face. His tears stopped as he swiped at the tracks on his cheeks. His sharp gaze was focused on Nate, listening to his voice and allowing him to pull Alex from the torture he'd just endured. He laughed at the story, the remnants of his nightmare fading away the more Nate talked.

By the time he was done, Alex had sat up and was still paying close attention. "Well, let's hope that you don't lose or break them. Then I'll be out a medic to put me back together" He said with a laugh. "I definitely would prefer that you can see." He added. Then a sigh escaped him. "I'm sorry about that, I have nightmares every now and then of leaving my family and group." He didn't want to go further into it, but that was the basics of it.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Nate stayed exactly where he was, right next to Alex on the floor even though he seemed better with the story. He probably should have backed up to give him space. He probably should not have kept his hand on Alex’s shoulder until he sat up. He probably should have moved his knees from touching his companions. But none of that really even occurred to him. It was true that Nate overall cared less about personal space, especially when it came to taking care of others. He was always the physically closest of everyone he knew. Some of his friends used to joke about that. ‘Haven’t you ever heard of personal space?’ They would ask him. ‘No, I don’t believe my mother ever taught me that one,’ he would laugh in return, though most of the time, this happened as he was patching someone up.

He placed his hand over Alex’s letting his fingers gently wrap around it. It was his turn to comfort his companion. He might have thought that it was only fair. He might have thought that it was the right thing to do. Mostly, he thought that it was what he wanted to do. “Don’t ever apologize because something haunts you.” With his other hand, he traced the line of his cheek, inspecting for tears like he might inspect for injury. “And if you ever want to, you can tell me about those demons. I will always listen.” He smiled then, big and toothy. “I just might not be able to see them if I lose these glasses.” He let the chuckle rise above the side between them, and he hoped it was enough to lighten the mood at least a little.

​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Alex had noticed that Nate was still close, his hand still on his shoulder and their knees touching. What Alex didn't tell Nate was that he liked the small touches. He hadn't really had any of that. His parents were distant, and the only one who ever hugged or touched him was his sister. But that stopped when she got older. His eyes traveled over Nate, his smile soft as he really took in his companion. Nate was definitely the opposite of Alex, outgoing and optimistic, where Alex tended to be withdrawn and even though he'd denied it, very much a pessimist.

Alex looked down as Nate put his hand over Alex's and wrapped his fingers around it. That small act brought way more comfort and butterflies in his stomach. He froze a moment later as Nate's other hand traced his cheek as if he was looking for something. Alex couldn't help himself, he leaned into the touch, enjoying every second of it. Nate then smiled, his big smile and Alex felt himself blush as he nodded. "Perhaps one day" He said quietly. Then a smile broke out on his face. "I'm gonna create something so they don't fall off your face" He said with a small laugh himself, the rest of his nightmare dissipated as he sat close to Nate. He looked at their hands again and shifted his fingers so they laced around Nate's. "Thank you" He said simply, thanking him for saving him from the nightmare, for helping him with his wound, and for traveling with him.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Nate held on to that hand, squeezing it as they talked, like it was the most natural thing in the world to do. Weirdly enough, it seemed like it was. Nothing was more natural than sitting on the forest floor with his companion of two whole days that felt like years, talking about how blind he was, and sharing like fears together. Perhaps not the full fears. They did not share the contents of Alex’s nightmares, and Nate did not share the fears behind every one of those giant smiles. Yet. After that thought, he knew that he needed to add a yet.

“How exactly do you plan on making something to keep these things on my face?” He asked with a chuckle. With his free hand, he pulled off the glasses, and the world went blurry. Well, some of it. He could still see Alex clear as day because they were so close. “What do you plan to do, tie them to my head like I tied the bandage around you?” The imagine in his brain was amusing if not downright silly.

​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

The silence in the woods was comforting. Having Nate beside him, their hands connected and feeling the squeezes was even better. He knew one day he'd share everything, but he needed to establish that connection between them. He'd never had someone help bring him out of a nightmare and it had made him grow even fonder of his companion.

Alex looked at the glasses in Nate's hands. "I could um take some rope and tie it just in front of that curved piece." Alex had no idea what it was called but those went behind Nate's ear. "I could tie it to your head if you want me too, but you definitely wouldn't be able to see." He added with a laugh. It was nice, this little break, this back and forth of ridiculous ideas. Alex found himself wanting to do this more often, maybe each night? He noticed that it was getting darker out as well. Well there goes today, with very little progress. Hopefully they can move further tomorrow. "I guess we just added a day to our original month" He said with a sigh, looking over at Nate.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Nate pulled the glasses between them, attempting to imagine this new possibility of glasses stability. It seemed unlikely that this could work, but that had not had any reason to double his new friend. With his perfect aim, survival skills, and swift movements, there seemed little that he could not do. Nate would be lying if he said that he was not impressed.

“Okay, but what if it comes undone? We should find a way to stick them to me!” He shoved the glasses back on his face, following the line of the frames to determine where they were against him. “We could always see them on. Then they could never fall off.” He laughed as he considered this. “Though that would be both gross and painful.” He brought the hand he grasped with him as he spoke, mostly because he talked with dramatic gestures and happened to have a hand with him.

“Really, it’s okay if we add one more day. It’s worth it for you to feel better.” He shone with the brightness of truth. “And I don’t mind if we travel together a little longer. It’s been nice to have someone to talk to. And who can down a deer for food. So much better than the canned things I’ve been living off of.” He peering into the coming darkness. One more day was just fine for him.

​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Alex laughed as he imagined how he could get Nate's glasses to stay. "Well, I uh could find some tape and tape them to your head" Alex suggested. The image that brought to Alex's mind made him laugh harder. He could see Nate with pieces of tape holding his glasses in place on either side of his face. Alex made a face at Nate's suggestion of sewing them on. "You'd be on your own with that one" Alex said.

Alex felt Nate take his hand with him as he talked, though Alex didn't really mind. He found it rather endearing that Nate talked with dramatic gestures and using his hands. It was so different from what he'd been used to. The Seraphites weren't very animated or excited for anything except for maybe their belief and making sure that the WLF didn't make it to the island.

Alex laughed. "That's fair, I won't be much help if I can't draw my bow" He said. "But that means no deer until I get better, so you'll just have to survive a little longer on canned foods. I've also enjoyed having someone to talk to, it's nicer than the silence I was traveling in before" Alex said truthfully. "Did you want your sleeping bag back for the night?" He asked Nate, looking at him.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Nate pulled their hands into his lap as he spoke, placing his other on top of them. “How about we figure this out tomorrow after we have slept well? Maybe we will have better ideas when we are not so tired and silly.” He leaned forward a little as the wave of laughter overtook him. “I mean, I think your first idea isn’t so bad, though I can’t fathom how it could possibly work. That’s what you’re for. You and your smart brain.”

He raised one hand and gently poked at Alex’s temple before pulling over his bag and pulling out a blanket that he haphazardly spread beside them, which was difficult with only one hand . “No, you keep the sleeping bag. Heal. I can rough it with the blanket for once. But I’ll stay close in case you need me, okay?” He hated the idea of not being near enough in case the nightmare came back. If he were closer, hopefully even in sleep he would hear or notice.

​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Alex looked down when Nate pulled their hands into his lap, covering it with his other hand. Alex blushed as he looked at Nate. "I- I um I think that's a good idea" Alex said, trying to control his words as he looked at Nate when he leaned forward a little. Alex looked at him, listening to his words and felt the heat increase in his face. "I'm.. I wouldn't um" He stopped trying to talk, clearly he couldn't. His brain was mush at this point, tired and exhausted, drained from the nightmare.

He let out a small laugh though as Nate poked his temple. He watched as Nate grabbed a blanket and spread it out with just one hand. "If you're sure then okay. And please, please stay close" He added, his voice softer at the last few words. He needed that tonight, and while he didn't understand why, he just knew he needed it. He kept their hands together as he shifted onto his side, looking at Nate with tired eyes.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Nate bit back a grin, inordinately amused by Alex’s inability to keep the conversation going. The stumbling words and the blush were just so cute. It was not something that he thought about often. Cute was such a subjective term, and he found that it applied to so many things. Like how Alex worked so hard to be this humble man who could never really understand his own talents. It was endearing. It was humbling. It was cute. And though he found many character traits of many people endearing, humbling, and cute, he was particularly intrigued by Alex.

He joined him then, laying on his blanket, swaddled in his jacket since he did not have the sleeping bag. He smiled, his own eyes dropping as well. He relaxed their clasped hands comfortably between them. “I promise. I’ll stay right here.“ and then his own tired eyes, after staying still for so long as Alex rested, closed once more and he drifted into his own sleep that he hoped would be restful enough for the day to come.

​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Alex laid on his side, looking at Nate and their hands laying between them. He finally felt his eyes closing as he fell back asleep. Alex had no nightmare that night, Nate's presence and holding his hand had grounded him enough that he was able to get some actual rest. Eventually the sun played on his face and he woke up. He blinked a few times as he woke, before he felt something warm beside him. Nate wasn't close enough to be it or he wasn't supposed to be. Apparently Alex had rolled onto his other side that night, his back close to Nate, so close that he could feel his warmth.

Their joined hands must've disconnected at some point that night. His morning fog was slowly lifting, but he found the position rather nice. He hadn't been close to anyone in a long time. Alex set his head on his arm, closing his eyes again to get a little more sleep. He was so peaceful that he didn't want to do anything that would interrupt it. He had no idea what would happen, but he actually found himself falling back asleep, eyes closing again.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

The sun prickled at his eyes, warm rays cascading through the branches. His mind woke before the rest of him. He lay there thinking of traveling through a run down town, talking about nothing with his companions. He listened to his mother’s quips. He laughed at Ben’s jokes. He rolled his eyes at Max’s protestations of skill. He clapped for Alex’s perfect aim. The warmth of the sun and the warmth of the waking dream kept him still for several minutes before his body realized that it was no longer meant to be in a restful daze. He pushed out an arm, meaning to stretch, but instead immediately hit something. His eyes shot open, alarm swarming his system.

Alex.
Oh.

He was so much closer than he remembered. That was okay. He didn’t mind. His fingers uncoiled, tips then palm touching back. His eyes traced the lines of scars still uncovered from the last check. The rag was gone from before with the nightmare. He would have to find that later. But for now, he should check on how Alex’s injury was doing. He ran his hand around the bruises. It was ugly but better. The swelling was almost completely gone. The color was terrible, but that meant it was healing. There was little left to reopen.
​

 

[EquineGurl23]

Alexander Brennan
Former Seraphite | 19 | Current location ;; North Dakota

Alex had slipped back into a dreamless relaxing state. His eyes opened slowly as he felt fingers on his back, tracing around the wound, and checking on it. "Nate?" He asked softly, not wanting to move if he was going to be working on his back. When he felt Nate's hand around the bruise, it didn't hurt like it did yesterday.

"How does it look?" He asked, trying to turn his head to look behind him at Nate. "Do you think I'll be good to travel today?" He added, again trying not to move. He wanted to look at Nate, to thank him for his help yesterday. His main concern now was could he still use his bow? Was he going to have to compensate his aim? He wouldn't know until he tried. "Will I be able to draw my bow back?" He had a lot of questions this morning but he wasn't sure if Nate would even have the answers.​

 

[icedthemoon]

Nathaniel Matthews
Former Firefly | 21 | Current location ;; North Dakota

“Mm?” He pulled his mind from his thoughts and back to the present. “It’s much better today. If this doesn’t hurt then you’ll probably do much better now. I’m not sure about the now, though. I don’t use those. I think,” he paused to trace the line of Alex’s muscles, imagining their movements. Determining. “it may be sore, but it won’t be too much to pull back on the bow. When you’re ready, we should test it before we move. So that we know.”

He sat up, pulling his hands away but staying close. He wanted to watch Alex’s body move to see how the muscles reacted around the bruise. If all was going to plan, they should be fine. Sore but fine. “Don’t get up until you’re ready though,” he added on. “I promise I’m not rushing you.”
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