Experiences Things that instantly make you drop an RP

[Idea]

@Idea For the 18 + comment do you mean as it pertains to the actual roleplay content? Ex I like to roleplay adult content so I would like it if my partner is X age or over.
As otherwise I'm not sure what there is to be fundamentally opposed over with age limits. That's like saying I'm fundamentally opposed to people who only accept real people face claims. You can not like that particular preference but I don't think it's really all that offensive to ask for it.

I am fundamentally opposed to it because I find it discrimatory, this is, it takes possibilties and chances from people based on unjustified criteria. Age does not equal maturity, and while for a few exceptions it is indeed understandable that you could not roleplay that with a younger person. I know it makes some people uncomfortable to roleplay with people below a certain age range, even if that person is just as if not more capable and available than the average adult, and I respect their decision not to do somehting they are uncomfortable with, however I stil find that criteria to be, and excuse the rudeness of my vocabulary, a little petty. Hence for some time (though nowadays I no longer do) I would go out of my not to agree to participating in roleplays with such a requirement.

 

[rae2nerdy]

I am fundamentally opposed to it because I find it discrimatory, this is, it takes possibilties and chances from people based on unjustified criteria. Age does not equal maturity, and while for a few exceptions it is indeed understandable that you could not roleplay that with a younger person. I know it makes some people uncomfortable to roleplay with people below a certain age range, even if that person is just as if not more capable and available than the average adult, and I respect their decision not to do somehting they are uncomfortable with, however I stil find that criteria to be, and excuse the rudeness of my vocabulary, a little petty. Hence for some time (though nowadays I no longer do) I would go out of my not to agree to participating in roleplays with such a requirement.

Um but it's not about maturity. It's about roleplaying with people who are your same age. It is literally no different than having preference for real world pictures because you find using anime art to be a kind of theft OR vice versa.

I think the idea that age requirements is linked to maturity is a well kind of immature idea. It's basically assuming a lot of negative connotation on people based on the fact that you don't like a preference they have. When in reality it has nothing to do with the prejudice you have against it and is instead just a simple preference some people have. ( to be clear I mean the general you not you specifically )

That was why I asked if it was when people were talking about specific content that you have a problem. Because that is a little more related directly to

I don't think XX aged people are mature enough to deal with XX content so I don't accept them as partners.

I mean you can absolutely dislike age limits in and of themselves. I just think it's a little unfair to assume things about people based on their preference. If anything I would think age limits are more related to your first point. The one about you not liking it when your style of roleplaying isn't allowed. Because if age limit is just a stylistic choice you don't like ( like asking for real person face claims ) than I mean it's fine not to like it.

I don't really particularly like them either. If only because I am actually too old to meet a good deal of them. But it isn't like something I find personally offensive. Just aww it sucks I can't join this roleplay because I'm too old. Oh well.

 

[Idea]

Um but it's not about maturity. It's about roleplaying with people who are your same age. It is literally no different than having preference for real world pictures because you find using anime art to be a kind of theft OR vice versa.

I think the idea that age requirements is linked to maturity is a well kind of immature idea. It's basically assuming a lot of negative connotation on people based on the fact that you don't like a preference they have. When in reality it has nothing to do with the prejudice you have against it and is instead just a simple preference some people have.

That was why I asked if it was when people were talking abotu specific content that you have a problem. Because that is a little more related directly to

I don't think XX aged people are mature enough to deal with XX content so I dont' accept them as partners.

Please don't misunderstand. I did mention maturity, but as a generalized case of a reason. In fact, the reason I explicitly mentioned was a sensation of discomfort, which was what I said was a little petty to discredit someone over.

There is one BIG difference between age requirements and picture choices, it's that you can't choose your age. If someone wants to roleplay with you but you need to use, say, anime pictures as one of your requirements, then the other person gets to decide whether they like that requirement. And if they don't they will themselves back away if their own free will. But even someone who normally wouldn't use a certain type of pic could make an exception for a roleplay opportunity that was extraordinary.

Age doesn't have that. Age can't be hosen, at most it can be lied about, but I think we can both agree lying is not the solution here.

 

[Thekikwidragon]

To be frank, there are a myriad of things that cause me to want to drop a roleplay almost immediately, though very rarely would I ever. The type of things that do indeed make me want to simply stem from the hyper elitist mentality most roleplaying websites I used to use have had.

People who have different opinions are fine, but yes I mean opinions, not outright badgerings or just flat out insults. When someone sees that they can't do a response to your post despite it being long, I respect it if they say they can't, or if they say they don't enjoy the post you made and ask for a rewrite. That inversely inspires a grand amount of respect for me. When someone goes out of their way to say " Anyone who writes 2-4 sentences is a completely horrid writer" I begin to get a sour taste in my mouth.

Criticism is needed, but there is a time and place for it. Dear lord group roleplayers don't seem to get this most of the time. When I first started roleplaying I had no understanding of English nor grammar, being heavily into other languages. Instead of being pulled aside and told what was wrong or what I was doing wrong, I was publicly chastised dozens of times for my poor grammar and even insulted. It's childish and the bereavement (Yes I consider roleplaying one of my loved passions and loved ones.) It commits is just immense. Imagine if you needed to learn, but all you received was a horrendously vicious criticism that publicly humiliates you dozens of times.

Lack of workarounds. Listen, a character can be insanely powerful, but not be a god mod, or OP. Hear me out here, as this is likely my controversial opinion. A character that can beat anyone in an outright fight, is not an OP character, It's a strong character. Characters that have immense strength or battle tenacity or etc. are fine, so long as they aren't all around perfect. A warrior who is a PERFECT, warrior, is fine. Perfect stratagem as well as fighting, physicality, etc. Though the warrior is easily manipulated outside of stratagems for war. A character that can massacre an army, but can be manipulated by his craving for love or affection, is a balanced character. I think these characters show the fragile nature of humans wonderfully. You can have an IQ of 200 sure, but that doesn't mean you can't pause and freak out because you don't know how to do the math for what you owe the bus driver.

 

[WeaselThor]

I think age restrictions are acceptable in certain formats.

For example in my Lost Children Rp the range for the Main 6 heroes is 8-24. This is because the genetic modifications blend better with prepubescent humans than postpubescent ones, and the organization is only 13 years old. (13 years in operation +11 for average age of puburty= 24) the limit of 8yrs is because it takes a while to do the programming and any less than that wont work with the sequel i have in mind.

So it is very possible that the preference is for stories sake. In most modern stories you would have to create a whole additional means of dealing with a minor character as the laws and expectations are different for them.

In stories that pertain to alot of things being a child is a huge disadvantage (or advantage) that alot of Gm's dont want to have to get involved with. What if a villain is supposed to be relatable? That goes out the window when they put children's lives in danger. So age restrictions are a valid and important part of rp creation and development.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Please don't misunderstand. I did mention maturity, but as a generalized case of a reason. In fact, the reason I explicitly mentioned was a sensation of discomfort, which was what I said was a little petty to discredit someone over.

There is one BIG difference between age requirements and picture choices, it's that you can't choose your age. If someone wants to roleplay with you but you need to use, say, anime pictures as one of your requirements, then the other person gets to decide whether they like that requirement. And if they don't they will themselves back away if their own free will. But even someone who normally wouldn't use a certain type of pic could make an exception for a roleplay opportunity that was extraordinary.

Age doesn't have that. Age can't be hosen, at most it can be lied about, but I think we can both agree lying is not the solution here.

But again your making the assumption that someone won't make an exception based on age that they would on say a visual medium. Many people will, at least when the age limit is related to simply wanting to roleplay people who are close to their own age. A lot of people are fine bending that if a partner suits their particular style of roleplay. Which is why I made the comparison. As for a lot of people it really is no different than requesting a specific kind of art.

When I say this I mean for a lot of people visual mediums are just a simple matter of preference. I like X style of art over Y style of art so I request X over Y. But if you like using Y style of art and we fit in all other aspects than sure I'll go ahead and use Y.

For other people they feel it is a matter of morality. Y style of art is stealing OR using the likenesses/works of others without their permission. I am not comfortable with that so please do not ask me to use Y art. Now obviously that's a little different than just having a prefrence. But by the same token I think we can both agree that if someone truly believes that using Y style of art is stealing it's not for us to tell them differently.

EDITED FOR CLARITY AND TO BE NICER.

I mean I can understand just flat out not liking something and having it turn you off a roleplay. I'm the same way with first person roleplayers. I flatly refuse to roleplay with someone who uses first person perspective. It's honestly super petty and judgmental but I always feel those people are just making self-inserts and don't know how to differentiate themselves from their characters.

Is that a fair assessment? No. Is it my own personal opinion and thus a valid reason for me not to roleplay with you? Yes.

I just find the hate that age limits get to be baffling when the searches usually specifically state that it is only about finding people who are near the same age as the poster. Like it's not me just making assumptions they will literally put in their search - Hi I'm 22 and I would like to roleplay with people nearish my own age so 18+ please.

 

[Idea]

But again your making the assumption that someone won't make an exception based on age that they would on say a visual medium. Many people will, at least when the age limit is related to simply wanting to roleplay people who are close to their own age. A lot of people are fine bending that if a partner suits their particular style of roleplay. Which is why I made the comparison. As for a lot of people it really is no different than requesting a specific kind of art.

When I say this I mean for a lot of people visual mediums are just a simple matter of preference. I like X style of art over Y style of art so I request X over Y. But if you like using Y style of art and we fit in all other aspects than sure I'll go ahead and use Y.

For other people they feel it is a matter of morality. Y style of art is stealing OR using the likenesses/works of others without their permission. I am not comfortable with that so please do not ask me to use Y art. Now obviously that's a little different than just having a prefrence. But by the same token I think we can both agree that if someone truly believes that using Y style of art is stealing it's not for us to tell them differently.

EDITED FOR CLARITY AND TO BE NICER.

I mean I can understand just flat out not liking something and having it turn you off a roleplay. I'm the same way with first person roleplayers. I flatly refuse to roleplay with someone who uses first person perspective. It's honestly super petty and judgmental but I always feel those people are just making self-inserts and don't know how to differentiate themselves from their characters.

Is that a fair assessment? No. Is it my own personal opinion and thus a valid reason for me not to roleplay with you? Yes.

I just find the hate that age limits get to be baffling when the searches usually specifically state that it is only about finding people who are near the same age as the poster. Like it's not me just making assumptions they will literally put in their search - Hi I'm 22 and I would like to roleplay with people nearish my own age so 18+ please.

The thing is, geek, you're not following what I am saying. Yes, you are correct and nobody or at least I am not denying that it is a preference. What I am saying, though, is that it is a preference which people cannot adapt in response of.

I am not saying it's not allowed, or that people are not in their right to have such preference and use it as a criteria. I am saying it is not a fair criteria, that it CAN'T be a fair criteria because the other person does not have a choice in whether they can meet that criteria, nor is there a reason why it would be a necessity. So, repeating once more: If you want to roleplay with someone within your age range, that's fine, you are in your right to make the rule, but I won't support it because that preference is not something I think is suitable as a criteria for choosing an RP partner and that it inherently disqualifies people with great potential for reasons which are, while acceptable, not enough to make the exclusion fair by themselves.

 

[rae2nerdy]

The thing is, geek, you're not following what I am saying. Yes, you are correct and nobody or at least I am not denying that it is a preference. What I am saying, though, is that it is a preference which people cannot adapt in response of.

I am not saying it's not allowed, or that people are not in their right to have such preference and use it as a criteria. I am saying it is not a fair criteria, that it CAN'T be a fair criteria because the other person does not have a choice in whether they can meet that criteria, nor is there a reason why it would be a necessity. So, repeating once more: If you want to roleplay with someone within your age range, that's fine, you are in your right to make the rule, but I won't support it because that preference is not something I think is suitable as a criteria for choosing an RP partner and that it inherently disqualifies people with great potential for reasons which are, while acceptable, not enough to make the exclusion fair by themselves.

And the bolded part I think is the problem I have. I don't think you mean for it to be taken this way but to me it comes across as dismissive and elitist. Well you don't roleplay using criteria I approve of so therefore your being unnecessary and unreasonable.

Which I guess could just be limitation of the current medium. People read things into statements that aren't necessarily meant to be.

So yeah I guess it was just me being defensive about something because I hate elitist mentality. Again not saying that was your intention it was just how I read it.

Having sorted that out I'll leave it alone. Again your entitled to your opinion just got all in my feelings about how you conveyed it. But that's my issue really nothing to do with you.

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When people use unreadable color / font / background / etc. Like when people get all in their asthetic to the point where you can't actually make out what they're saying.

I'm like nah. If I can't read it I won't respond.

 

[Idea]

rae2nerdy if there is anything that way of thinking is not, for this situation anyway, is elitist. Indeed you misunderstood, but looking at it again, I probably should have worded it better. So my bad there.

I would actually suggest it is the exact opposite of elitism. What I am saying the criteria is not that it is the criteria I would use or not, but rather that it is not a factor that leads to what the rule forbids.

It is not discriminatory for say, a blind man not being allowed to be a pilot, because their blindness, while not something they can control, prevents them from being able to do the job of piloting effectively. It is also fair that a company does not hire someone who refuses to work for the wage they set for a given position, since the person had the choice in whether or not they agreed to that wage.
However, in any other situation- one in which neither the person has a choice in the he factor nor is that factor something by itself is problematic for what they want- the factor is not a fair criteria for rejecting them.

That said, and I'm sorry for being so repetitive, even if the criteria isn't fair the person still has the right to set that as their criteria, I just refused to roleplay with those with that criteria due to finding it unfair.

That said, as I stated in my post, I've grown more lax regarding the specific criteria of age restrictions.

 

[Chimney Swift]

• Inexcusable levels of inaccuracy when playing disabled or mentally ill characters. This is especially a pet peeve for me with autistic characters ('cause I'm autistic and I can immediately spot a poorly researched autistic character from a mile away). I just can't deal.
• Failure to research the time period the RP takes place in. It's okay if not every player knows what the most popular moustache style was in the year 1850, but if they think it's okay to have a character named "Brylee" who wears nothing but tight pants and a corset top and works a job that didn't exist, then I can't play the game with them. It just pulls me out of the scene so much when people won't even do baseline research.
• Players who constantly derail the plot by being pointlessly violent, melodramatic or just attention-seeking at every given opportunity.
• Grammar, spelling, or punctuation errors that make posts difficult or even impossible to read. A few occasional typos is fine, but if it's clear that you don't know basic linguistic conventions then I have no interest in schlepping my way through all your posts.

 

[Svisttt]

Lazy posters bug the heck outta me.

I'm not meaning people who genuinely don't have the time to post- I get that and that's totally understandable. I'm mostly meaning people who make a character sheet, they get accepted, and everything seems well and fine, but when the RP starts they only ever post after stretches of time and what they write isn't very detailed or well written, or simply a one liner. It makes me wonder why the person even joined the RP if they weren't going to be very active in the roleplay and only seems to write one to two sentences at a time. Usually, they don't even catch up with what happened in the RP and simply poorly interject themselves in the middle of things without much context on what is going on plot wise.

Again, I get people sometimes don't have the time to make posts and I'm probably describing this badly, but it's an issue I've come across on other forums I've been on and it's painful to deal with.

 

[WeaselThor]

Lazy posters bug the heck outta me.

I'm not meaning people who genuinely don't have the time to post- I get that and that's totally understandable. I'm mostly meaning people who make a character sheet, they get accepted, and everything seems well and fine, but when the RP starts they only ever post after stretches of time and what they write isn't very detailed or well written, or simply a one liner. It makes me wonder why the person even joined the RP if they weren't going to be very active in the roleplay and only seems to write one to two sentences at a time. Usually, they don't even catch up with what happened in the RP and simply poorly interject themselves in the middle of things without much context on what is going on plot wise.

Again, I get people sometimes don't have the time to make posts and I'm probably describing this badly, but it's an issue I've come across on other forums I've been on and it's painful to deal with.

And i strongly agree with that. Usually when that happens it kills an rp. I have recently made the decision to NPC steer peoples characters out of the way when that happens. But Thats a solution only a gm can provide. As an rper its harder to deal with. I feel your pain bro.

 

[Idea]

And i strongly agree with that. Usually when that happens it kills an rp. I have recently made the decision to NPC steer peoples characters out of the way when that happens. But Thats a solution only a gm can provide. As an rper its harder to deal with. I feel your pain bro.

One thing I've started doing in my RPs is to put it in the rules that by joining they are agreeing to allowing the character be controlled as an NPC if they vanish.

 

[WeaselThor]

One thing I've started doing in my RPs is to put it in the rules that by joining they are agreeing to allowing the character be controlled as an NPC if they vanish.

That's a good tactic i think ill include that in my next project.

 

[Melpomene]

I must day, one thing that makes me drop and Rp like a hot potato is when it is obvious that someone obviously does not understand that Rping is a two way street. A collaborative experience where we can both have fun!

I always hate it when I am PM'd (or do the PMing) for an rp and this person wants everything to go their way or the highway. They won't accept any of my ideas, they will not even fathom me playing a character that is not the perfect crush that they had in mind, or just plain trying to convince me to do something that I had said multiple times before that I did not want to do.

 

[Andrita]

To be quite frank, you can do an OP RP character right... [ I've done practically the same character every time for fandoms ... For at least a year ... * Insert Mascot Character here * ... And only once have I been denied .... But that was mainly because they wouldn't allow him to be a part of the RP. Anytime I've used him It was successful . ] As long as you use them correctly in the setting, and don't God-Mod [ You just have to show restraint ... It isn't difficult. The main reason people fail at using them is lack of restraint in what they allow their characters to do ] . As such, my cringiness isn't exactly with OP characters. I do complain about how they use them in the setting.

 

[Shuusuke]

I think this only counts as 50% dropping, but if I see gender limitations for players (not characters) I'll probably stay away from joining regardless of the RP itself. I say 50% because, well, if they say female-only, then it's not like I could get in in the first place...but if they said male-only, I would be qualified to join but wouldn't.

I made this pretty clear on previous topics, but to repeat myself I don't like RPs that feel like there's an agenda behind them, other than enjoying cooperatively writing a story. It's why I don't do romance RPs, for example, yet am fine with it happening if it makes sense. And I can see an agenda if you require that the player be a specific gender.

I had one instance of this happening...but after I expressed interest in joining. So because of that, it's not like I dropped it, but I was dropped because of it. If that had been said in the introduction post, none of this unpleasantry would have happened.

As for the posts above, please refrain from throwing labels out there. The person simply said they don't like being forced to play a character with a certain characteristic. This can easily snowball into a discussion, which is not what this topic is for, and is simply unpleasant in general when it devolves into insults.

 

[Maine Coon]

I think this only counts as 50% dropping, but if I see gender limitations for players (not characters) I'll probably stay away from joining regardless of the RP itself. I say 50% because, well, if they say female-only, then it's not like I could get in in the first place...but if they said male-only, I would be qualified to join but wouldn't.

I made this pretty clear on previous topics, but to repeat myself I don't like RPs that feel like there's an agenda behind them, other than enjoying cooperatively writing a story. It's why I don't do romance RPs, for example, yet am fine with it happening if it makes sense. And I can see an agenda if you require that the player be a specific gender.

I had one instance of this happening...but after I expressed interest in joining. So because of that, it's not like I dropped it, but I was dropped because of it. If that had been said in the introduction post, none of this unpleasantry would have happened.

As for the posts above, please refrain from throwing labels out there. The person simply said they don't like being forced to play a character with a certain characteristic. This can easily snowball into a discussion, which is not what this topic is for, and is simply unpleasant in general when it devolves into insults.

I apologize if it came out sounding as if I was labeling him as such, I was just asking him if he is homophobic because of the way he phrased his statement which I found slightly offending. Not because I'm gay, I'm actually biromantic, but because he made it sound as if there is and should be a certain lack of respect for "gay ass" people.

 

[salty_ moustachio]

Guy is a troll guys.

 

[hologram]

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When people use unreadable color / font / background / etc. Like when people get all in their asthetic to the point where you can't actually make out what they're saying.

I'm like nah. If I can't read it I won't respond.

This is becoming more and more of an issue for me. Some of the text sizes sometimes used on this site are small enough that I can't really make things out without spending like, 3 times as long as it'd take me to read the post were the font size a little larger.

I'm definitely not a fan of too much of the 'unreadable aesthetic', either. Like bbcode that centers everything into one little box in the center of the page with a scrollbar just to read it, then there's text boxes within this box that also requires scrollbars to read, and everything is in a super tiny font...

I've seen some gorgeous bbcode that makes things organized and easy to read, and I've also seen bbcode with a comfy aesthetic to it that doesn't detract from the reading process too much. But I feel like some people leave actual readability as an afterthought, which makes things difficult for users with vision difficulties as well as folks who browse on mobile. Some of these bbcodes also aren't readable at all from a mobile browser, at least from what I've noticed on my phone.

 

[GoldenSlime]

That moment when I read the whole 1x1 search and I'm a perfect match with this person and we like the same Fandoms and have the same ships and a really similar style of writing and humor and then...
It says 18+ only.
Well fuck. Couldn't you say that at the START so I didn't have to read your whole damn post and get my hopes up and all?
One time I actually PMed someone and we were planning the RP and then they said WELL WHOOPS I ONLY RP 18+. Like, the fuck. You didn't SAY that in your search.

I'm a 13 year old, not the black plague.

And then when people are like, "Are you really 13?" Like...how would it benefit me to lie about my age? HOW? WHY would anyone lie about their age (with the exception of someone who's younger than 13 lying about being 13 to get on a 13+ site and stuff like that)?
And damn. It's sad how little people think 13 year olds are capable of. I know, I know, I'm 13 and I can write a cohesive sentence. It's a super power.

When someone makes a big deal out of my age, I'm usually like

 

[MechanicalSnake]

I would like to note here that I do find the age requirements based on personal comfort unreasonable under -certain- conditions and very reasonable under other conditions.

Take as an example someone, who is around 13 and someone who is around 30. When I was 13, it would have made me vastly uncomfortable to roleplay with someone who could, if they started early, be my parent. They were an adult and it would have been awkward. Now that I am 30ish myself, I would feel super uncomfortable writing with a 13 year old. Even though I feel and look young, have a band and consider myself a cool person, I would feel awful in an RP with a kid, god forbid if romantic stuff were to arise. (And I have felt this way already at 24 or so.) Whether they are 20 or 50, that is a non issue to me, just please be done with highschool. On the other hand, if two people meet, one of whom is 17 and the other 19, it would be really weird to insist on the under 18 rule, as they are basically peers. But in my experience, people of those ages usually don't insist on it.

 

[rae2nerdy]

And damn. It's sad how little people think 13 year olds are capable of. I know, I know, I'm 13 and I can write a cohesive sentence. It's a super power.

When someone makes a big deal out of my age, I'm usually like

You laugh. But writing a coherent sentence IS a superpower in some roleplay circles.

 

[GoldenSlime]

You laugh. But writing a coherent sentence IS a superpower in some roleplay circles.

Well...

....Can't argue with that.

 

[Svisttt]

Like...how would it benefit me to lie about my age? HOW? WHY would anyone lie about their age (with the exception of someone who's younger than 13 lying about being 13 to get on a 13+ site and stuff like that)?

I suppose some people would lie about their ages for privacy reasons, even if they were older than 13. I personally don't do this, I simply make it so my age isn't displayed, but I've known some people who have done this before.