The Vending Machine of MAGIC re-boot

[TrippyVirus]

The Vending Machine of
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MAGIC
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The instructions:
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Give an output from the last poster, then you give an input into the vending machine.
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Le example:
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Guy A: I insert a penny.
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Guy B: You get a nickel. I insert a piece of cardboard.
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Guy C: You get a cardboard box. I insert a Diamond.
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And so on,
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The rules:
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1.  Make sure the output is related to the last poster's input. But you can put an input unrelated to it.
   
2. Do not put dumb, offensive or disturbing inputs.
   

I'll start:
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I insert a cup.
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[FarFlungDreamer]

You get a drink. I insert a paper.

 

[Sizniche]

You get hella paper, dawg! Rake in them stacks!


I insert the souls of the unborn.

 

[A Mysterious Figure]

You get hella paper, dawg! Rake in them stacks!


I insert the souls of the unborn.

You receive the souls of the born. 


I insert a magic wand.

 

[MedievalMethods]

You receive Neville Longbottem


I insert Buyers Remorse

 

[Historical Storyteller]

You receive wads of torn cash.  (Ok, fine, you receive a million dollars.)


I insert the internet.

 

[Greenbriar]

You get cat pics.


I insert ice cream.

 

[Mazz]

You get a milkshake.


I insert  a DVD.

 

[KhazTheGiraffe]

You get an Error: Cannot recognize disk. Ensure disk is not damaged in any way.


I insert my inner demons.

 

[ctdos]

You receive my outer demons.


I insert a paperclip

 

[q r o w]

YOu get a stack of paper. 


I insert a sword

 

[Boethiah]

You get a sword wound


I insert a brick

 

[q r o w]

You get a house of bricks.


I insert my eternal life. 

 

[Fistfullofjam]

You get eternal damnation in the pits of hell


I insert a rocket propelled grenade at high velocity

 

[q r o w]

You get blown up from the recoil. 


I insert a drawing.

 

[Fistfullofjam]

You get a scholarship to a liberal arts college


I insert an SD card


(RPG launchers don't have recoil)

 

[Darkstar22]

You get corrupted data.


I insert season 1 of Breaking Bad.

 

[Fistfullofjam]

You get a nice box of Minerals


I insert a stale hotdog bun

 

[Darkstar22]

You get a mini hotdog vender.


I insert a normal vending machine.

 

[Idea]

You get a kinky vending machine


I insert a dog collar

 

[KAmber]

You get a dress collar


I insert a corpse

 

[Darkstar22]

You get a pet zombie.


I insert my left foot.

 

[Idea]

You get a Bigfoot 


I insert the fountain of youth 

 

[Davis Butler]

You get a child.


I insert Einstein. 


(somehow)

 

[Idea]

you get stein´s gate


I insert a dragon egg