neverbackdown
To live would be an awfully big adventure
"Angel cornered me that morning, he had a private investigator following me who took some really good pictures of us" her tone was bitter, it was clear she still hadnt forgiven Angel for what he had done "he told me if I got you to meet me at the Deli then he'd burn all evidence and let you live" she closed her eyes again, stopping the tears from running "but if I went against him then he'd show my father the pictures and he said he'd cut your dick off before blowing your brain out through your ears" his words felt vile in her mouth but she tried not to sound too emotional as she spoke reminding herself that right now she needed to be the strong one "I panicked, you were theyre target and you wouldnt have hid so they would have gotten you regardless and you know Angel, he meant what he said so I rang the pub. I realized how stupid I had been and rang the pub back but I was too late you had already gone to the deli so I packed a bag and tried to get to the Deli but my father wouldnt let me leave the house and by then I was too late". Alex's words were filled with self hate and she found herself unable to look at Conor due to her shame "I was afraid, I was afraid what Angel would do to you and the state my father was in well I was afraid off what he'd do to me, he wasnt himself and I just ..." Alex trailed off as she made herself look at Conor. At the sight of tears Alex gently placed her hand on his arm before she realised he probably didnt want her to touch him and so she let her arm drop back onto her lap "Im so sorry, I can't imagine what you went through and are still going through so Im not going to pretend that I do but if theres anything, anything at all that would give you some relief tell me and Ill do it. I dont care if you want to punch me I deserve it" she told him. His final words still stung but she pushed through the pain willing herself not to break, when he had clearly had it so much worse "Conor I love you" she blurted out, this statement shocked Alex but she ignored it and kept speaking "I wish I could take it all back, but I did not play you or use you and I need you to know that. Now if you want me to walk away and leave you alone then tell me and thats what I'll do" she said looking him in the eye. Alex did not want to leave Conor in this state but if thats what he asked off her then she would do exactly that.
Misty Gray