Futuristic Templar Characters

[Enkerzed]

@SecretRock Approved, welcome to the rp. Feel free to post at anytime.


@Nakami I can see you're a decent writer, but your character... there are some issues with your character. Firstly, I'm not sure if you're aware of this but I've rejected another character before due to their stated lack of combat experience or training. This is especially important because the Templars are supposed to be warriors, you see. They're basically going to be the champions of humanity who'll be taking the fight to the phantoms and hard life or no, they can't do that without some kind of martial prowess or any other valuable skill.


Secondly, your character's background is a bit vague and this might be a bit of a misunderstanding on my part, but I'll mention it anyway. For as long as the barrier is up, there's no in or out of a grand city like Scipio and it's been up for 8 years so there would be no recon missions. At best, I would consider life as a criminal or peacekeeper in Scipio. The peacekeepers wouldn't be unlike Judge Dredd and the priests are basically thought crime detectors, so with that and tracking chips being a thing, I can imagine there being a few people taking issue with that. Despite being insulated from the rest of the world, a grand city isn't without its own troubles. If this is what you were trying to get across in the first place however, then I apologize for missing it.


Still though, a character's got to be a warrior to have any business being a Templar. That'll be the more important thing to consider, so would you mind editing your character with that in mind?

 

[Nakami]

@Nakami I can see you're a decent writer, but your character... there are some issues with your character. Firstly, I'm not sure if you're aware of this but I've rejected another character before due to their stated lack of combat experience or training. This is especially important because the Templars are supposed to be warriors, you see. They're basically going to be the champions of humanity who'll be taking the fight to the phantoms and hard life or no, they can't do that without some kind of martial prowess or any other valuable skill.


Secondly, your character's background is a bit vague and this might be a bit of a misunderstanding on my part, but I'll mention it anyway. For as long as the barrier is up, there's no in or out of a grand city like Scipio and it's been up for 8 years so there would be no recon missions. At best, I would consider life as a criminal or peacekeeper in Scipio. The peacekeepers wouldn't be unlike Judge Dredd and the priests are basically thought crime detectors, so with that and tracking chips being a thing, I can imagine there being a few people taking issue with that. Despite being insulated from the rest of the world, a grand city isn't without its own troubles. If this is what you were trying to get across in the first place however, then I apologize for missing it.


Still though, a character's got to be a warrior to have any business being a Templar. That'll be the more important thing to consider, so would you mind editing your character with that in mind?

@Enkerzed I've been going back and forth on your comment, and have make changes to the CS, though I'm not 100% on whether I've fixed all of the criteria, so any further criticism in that regard is appreciated! ...let's hope I've not just gone and screwed up even harder, shall we?

 

[Enkerzed]

@Nakami it's certainly an improvement, but not enough to be in league with the Templars. Knowing how to box is simply not good enough to put your character on par with those in the military or survivors from the old world before the meteor, so I'm sorry but I still can't accept your character the way it is now. If you'd like, I can help by answering any questions you might have, but this will be your last chance to make adjustments. Otherwise, I'll simply have to draw the line here.

 

[Latorrex]

Name: CHERUBIM X00012 BATTLECLASS HAEMONCULI. Serial Number: 158987-000006



Alias: Marci
 


Gender: Female


Age: 21


Specialty: Counter Demonic and Purging Operations



Character Image:

Character Description: Due to heavy experimentation and physical human alteration to combat the demonic threat, Haemonculi are more machine than they are human. Holding onto the fringe of their own humanity, they are products to serve man until their ultimate demise. Their souls are extracted and condensed into a soul shard which powers their core located within their chest cavity. Their limbs are replaced with powerful prosthesis and their senses surgically altered. They have no need for food, drink nor air but can metabolize if the want arises. And because the have no natural free will, they have handlers to control them until passed on to the station of command.



Personality: Haemonculi have inhibited emotions, making them very resolute soldiers. They will not run away and will see the mission through. Marci's remnant of human personality is that she loves music, being able to piece together a symphony within herself in the midst of combat. Among her melodious archive that she has collected, she has taken unto her songs of ages long since past and she cherishes them deeply.


Backstory: From the notes of Doctor Tenvas Imari final log summary "CHERUBIM X00012 BATTLECLASS HAEMONCULI. Serial Number: 158987-000006 is among the only models of the Haemonculi weapons to be created before the project will be shut down. She will be the last one alive to fight for our failing humanity. She was a child... 16 when we found her starving on the streets. To some, it would be seen as cruelty because of what we did. But it was for their best interest.

Marcia Wong, as her name was, came into the facility emaciated, trembling and lacking of color of flesh. so our first move was to rehabilitate her to meet the optimum condition of her coming procedure that would have her cease to be in normal circumstances. We fed her a steady diet of protein and exercised her to peak physical condition, pumping many chemicals to reduce muscular buildup to create lean efficient muscle tissues. Side effects of the treatment included a bluish hue to the pigment of the skin. I as well as my Assistant, Dr. Thomas Gains ran test to see if there were any adverse effects to the treatment. To my abashment, we found none.

Months went by before we went through the first procedure, The Condensation of the Soul Shard. It was those screams that haunted our work as many of our researchers would leave. I did not have such a luxury. We pressed on. Clamping her down unto the table and activating the whiring maelstrom of the soul siphon that ripped the soul from the body. The husk that was once Marcia Wong ceased to be that night. After we had re-wired her nervous system and replaced her limbs with prosthesis 7 times the effect of the strongest humans, we inserted the soul shard to power her back up. 

That's the beauty of the soul shard isn't it? To be able to restore the life of a thing that had lost its soul to a fraction of what it once was. To sacrifice their soul for greater power?

It was after that incident, She joined her brothers and sisters. Decker, Dewit, Risa, Vicktor, Venice. All deceased at the time of this writing.

After the death of her family as she had come to know, 4 years had gone by and the chickens of our sins have come home to roost. Our project had been discovered and has been ordered to shut down by the Imperial Authority and has ordered the destruction of all materials related to the Haemonculi project. After all that I did to her, I cannot bear to take the life of the last of my children.

She is now in the hands of my assistant, taking her to the Templars of Gaia, As I hope that they may have use of her.  I can now rest knowing my work will not be squandered.

For Gaia. 

Extra: Marci fights with Gun and Blade, Acting as a mobile gun platform and front-line specialist.

 

[Darth Gangsta]

Standing at nearly eight feet (due to mutagens and multiple serums), Logan towers over most of his allies and enemies. Under the helmet, a middle aged man with dark brown hair and a small, yet deep, scar that goes from his lower forehead to above his eyebrow could be seen. He's clean shaven and has two studs just above his right eyebrow, which are in fact, titanium and are meant to essentially keep Logan's skull from falling apart.


NAME- Logan Smith


ALIAS- The Iron Bull
 


GENDER- Male


AGE- 44


SPECIALTY- Heavy Infantry


PERSONALITY- Logan is a quiet individual that cares much for honor and loyalty. Even off of the field of battle, he still has the same solemn personality and seems to have no sense of humor at all (and he prefers to keep it that way). Most people find Logan as a cynical character due to his former position as a soldier. Logan doesn't fully trust the Templar society because he is new and the administrators are definitely keeping secrets from him.


BACKSTORY- Logan is the single child of Helen Smith and Scott Smith and was born in the barrier city known as Scipio. Logan was taken by the military at about the age of three. He was given many mutagens and serums do grant him his hulking size and immense physical strength. Normally, space marines weren't used in normal operations but when World War 6 had started, the military mustered up all of the few Space Marines to fight.


After WW6, Logan continued to do his job as a space marine. That was also when the phantoms started to appear and Logan was chosen to by the Gaia to become a Templar. Logan is one of the newest Templar and is practically the only space marine within Templar society. As of now, Logan doesn't trust any Templar and prefers to keep to himself.  


    


EXTRA- Logan uses a weapon called Bolter as well as a melee weapon he calls a Chainsword. He wields the Chainsword in his right hand and the Bolter in his left. 

 

[Enkerzed]

@Latorrex and @Darth Gangsta, I was too sick and headachey at the time to care, but I'm a set this straight now. I know this rp has really heavy WH40k vibes, but for the love of the Emperor, this is not actually WH40K and characters that are distinctly WH40K like the Tau and SPEHS MEHRENS will simply not fit in here, so your characters will not be approved as they are now.

 

[Latorrex]

@Latorrex and @Darth Gangsta, I was too sick and headachey at the time to care, but I'm a set this straight now. I know this rp has really heavy WH40k vibes, but for the love of the Emperor, this is not actually WH40K and characters that are distinctly WH40K like the Tau and SPEHS MEHRENS will simply not fit in here, so your characters will not be approved as they are now.

Huh? My character isn't tau. You didn't read my character Bio? Besides, tau dont have noses.

 

[Enkerzed]

I have read the background, I'm not disapproving your character out of hand here, but I did mention that your choice of picture for representing your character would be a factor and I can see that you've based your character around that particular image. I'm afraid that you'll have to either find another picture of a blue skinned female character or change that part altogether, either way this xeno has to go.

 

[FTR]

Name: Leora de Rosso


Alias: La Luce
 
Gender: Female
 
Age: 26
 
Specialty: Mobile Artillery/ Logistics (the who, what, how, why and where of the operation)
 
Character Image: (Yes, I  realize that the unscathed thigh is contradictory to the damage I claimed but fuk it, I like the picture.)
 
Artillery Piece Image: 


Character Description: 
-Prosthesis for her entire right arm, and both legs at the knee
-Her gruff voice and intense stare betray her soft features and feminine build
-Standing 1.74m tall and weighing in at 194lbs with full prosthesis and 96lbs without.
-Wears a torso support brace to help with the added weight of the prosthetic arm as well as assisted counterbalancing and to add additional rigidity. The underlying layer is designed as a second skin to reinforce the heavily damaged tissue of her center mass. 



Personality: Largely considered a joker with dark humor, and a special inclination to raillery, Leora is always the life of the party and comedic relief, finding the good in even the most grim of scenarios; perhaps as a method to cope. She tends to be a bit down on herself but will do her best to hide her internal conflicts from those around her. On occasion you can catch a glimpse into this side of her, as she'll sometimes stare off somberly into nothing, the expression on her face saying it all. 



Backstory: Born in the Barrier city of Principium, Leora had a rough childhood. Orphaned by war and left for naught in an orphanage on the outskirts of the city the world was already molding her for the path that lay ahead. As a young girl and a ward of the state she didn't have very much going for her, however her natural aptitude for mathematics and science coupled with a few strong leadership qualities caught the eye of Jovanna Rici, the Matron. Up until that point, Leora had spent most of her time on the streets hanging out with the, uncharacteristically mentor-like, older orphans being schooled in the ways of the hoodlum. She'd picked up quickly and learned basic skills (lock-picking, slight of hand, acting, retreat) for survival in a less than friendly world and the even less friendly part of town the institution was situated in. You had to either be fast or big and have your wits about you if you were to make it out of a confrontation. Despite her success on the mean streets, Matron Jovanna had bigger and better plans for little Leora and enforced a strict regimental program to groom her for a chance of escape through recruitment to an Academy designed to create a steady supply of young commissioned officers. Reluctantly, the girl complied to the demands and followed the program to a T. Long nights of study and longer days of physical training sculpted her into the best version of herself landing leaps and bounds ahead of her peers in most facets. By the age of 15 she was finally granted audience with a recruiter, who took a liking to her, quoting "You're exactly the type of candidate we're looking for." Her time at the academy was one of the last times she ever felt bliss, in spite of the increased stress and continued developmental regiment. She built a strong connection to her class and gained newfound purpose patriotism and notion of heroism. When the meteor struck the initial devastation of the impact was foremost in mind. Being a senior and 19 years of age she opted for early graduation and deployment in the relief effort. Given her skill set she was designated to the Long Range Reconnaissance and Pathfinder's Corps, and she ran as the CO to a search and rescue squad leading in spirit while the actual governing was left to the more experienced NCO, a Staff Sergeant. What ensued was nothing short of a horror movie. During the rescue portion of the operation her team made contact with what has now come to be known as "Husks". They were initially blindsided by the threat, such an attack had been completely unanticipated and the fallout had jammed their comms with the rest of their battalion. The hellish creatures made quick work of the civilian rescues who all scattered at the sight of them, sealing their own fates. Leora and her team soon ran out of munitions and having packed only the bare minimum, again, not having anticipated coming under attack. It was at this point the things really hit the fan, the situation devolved from a controlled fall to a tumble as they made a mad dash to the edges of the ruins where the checkpoints had been set. One by one her team fell victim to the abominations. Not but a few hundred meters from safety, her sergeant's legs became crippled by an attack and she from exertion. Leora tried to carry the bear of a man to the finish but simply wasn't strong enough. Words were exchanged, goodbyes uttered and she regretfully left him behind, propped up against a fallen wall and knife in hand. She just barely made the helicopter out as their forces retreated from the chaos that was the zones around the impact site. The months after the failure saw a deep guilt and hatred grow within her and as her wounds healed her resolve hardened. For the next 4 years she mounted countless excursions into the dead zones taking on a variety of missions and directives as a LRRP scout...losing countless friends to the demons from the stars. It was during this time that her jovial mien and assumed heritage gave her the nickname "La Luce" or "The Light".


On a mission to set up a temporary shield in a clearing for a forward base deep within an enemy concentration, her squad fell prey to an ambush of sorts. Unwilling to lose anymore people she fought tooth and nail in that clearing using any and all tactics to protect her and her own. In the fray one of her comrades was downed while holding a live grenade and in a selfless act attempted to shield those around her from the blast by jumping onto it. But the grenade had been cooked and blew before she could fully cover it. What happened after that comes in flashes, Leora remembers the bang, the blinding light, the heat, then the cold, unintelligible shouts and monstrous howls; the sights come in flashes like photographs in sequence. Being dragged, broken and mangled and to a container, firefight raging in the background. Being dumped inside and bathed in bio-gel, then the lid being shut and the darkness that followed.


Waking in an unsettlingly white room with a majority of your limbs missing as well as the men and women you were clawing through hell with not moments ago was quite the experience for Leora, she still has nightmares about it. She'd suffered irreparable damage to her legs and right arm, calling for amputation, and destroyed the tissue on the lower right of her torso as well as having obliterated 3 ribs. Physically, she was unfit and her flat spin into depression upon learning the fate of her team accompanied her internalized blame and made her mentally so. Thus, she was honorably discharged from the LRRP Corps. 
As crushed as she was she refused to give in to defeat, to lose to this plague. She pleaded, begged and bitched for a chance to fight, just one more chance for redemption, finally being granted position in the Heavy Weapons Division as an Mobile Artillery Officer. Luckily for her, she wasn't absolutely lost given the overlap with her previous occupation she was already a wiz at getting fire for effects on the first try and managing several aspects of a diverse multi-phase operation. The mechanical part was another story, but like everything in life it came around with hard work and dedication. Eventually growing tired of the lack of direct assault and basic defense missions she was receiving and having gotten what she truly came for, Leora left the service. She felt ready to apply herself to the fight and decided the most direct way of doing so was auditioning for The Templar. So, she, her expertise and her Mobile Artillery Piece (procured Johnny Cash's "One piece at a time" style) embarked on the path knighthood(?). However given the nature of her departure (more or less AWOL/UA) as well as the fact she was now in possession of a one (wo)man artillery battery made it clear to her that she'd be best off leaving Principium to do so. Leora decided on the barrier city of Scipio because of it's sufficient distance and independence from Principium as well as it's relatively close proximity when considering other ideal locations. 
 
Extra:












(I'm gonna ahead and apologize in advance if I created any obvious situational/plot/lore problems with this CS or if it just sucks in general. Plus, any grammar fails I probably committed..............but I can't bothered to write this AND read it, so please bear with me. :smile9: )

 

[FTR]

@Enkerzed ^^^^


Oops, forgot to tag you 

 

[Enkerzed]

@Pumpkin Spice Cyanide What an amazing character! ... If only she was in Scipio lol

So yeah, there's just one thing. Remnants and husks are not the same. Remnants are those who lived outside of the barrier cities (aka grand cities), and anywhere that wasn't a barrier city was pretty much a post-apocalyptic hell hole even before the Phantoms arrived. It's for this reason that remnants are otherwise known as 'ferals' by people living in the barrier cities (though I wouldn't use that term to their faces if I were you). Husks on the other hand are those who have been possessed by the Phantoms and have now been transformed into malformed, mindless creatures that attack anything and anyone in sight.


Apart from that, you're good to go. But, uh, your character will actually have to be in Scipio right now if you want to post right away. Otherwise, you'll be waiting quite a while before we get to the point in the rp where we encounter Templars from other cities.

 

[FTR]

@Enkerzed


Thanks! Can't say I didn't expect something to be wrong tho lol  :smile2:


I think that I made the CS more to your liking 


But, I'll be waiting for your confirmation before I do anything, just to be sure

 

[Enkerzed]

@Pumpkin Spice Cyanide Character approved! You may post at anytime.