Fandom Star Wars

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin sighed, the pout on her lips only playful, despite that she did miss his touch as he withdrew his hands from her. Her fingers lingered in his hair as the distance increased between them, her hands running along his shoulders before she let them drop, she too leaning back against the seat she previously sat in.

She had to giggle when he complained about the distance between them, as if he hadn’t created it in the first place. She pulled her legs to herself, wrapping her arms around them, as far from Kylo as she could get in their little space on the ground. “How about now?” Even with the lack of physical connection, there was no absence of that warmth he made her feel, or the content.

She was happy to sit there, to take in his sly smile that she instantly adored, to listen to the rumble of his voice. Wrapped in the buzz of the Force that reflected how they felt.

She didn’t understand what could be wrong with this, she couldn’t see what Snoke would oppose. They were on the same side, weren’t they? She knew their alone time was coming to an end, when such thoughts flooded her head.

Paquin let one of her legs relax, let it stretch out and brush against his. Even such minuscule contact had her heart fluttering. “I don’t understand what’s wrong with this, what Snoke thinks is wrong with this,” her voice was still quiet, even more so. “It feels right. And maybe, I don’t know if it’s how it works, but I feel pulled towards this, towards you. And Ariel, Gnaeus.” Like they were meant to be where they were.

How could Snoke fight that?

Maybe it was just herself, her own Force that reached for what she wanted. But it was a strange series of events that led her, all of them, to this.

Or maybe it was just the Force setting them up for disaster.

-

Hux thoughtlessly followed her onto the balcony, enticed by the rain, but even more so by her. By the illusion of isolation with her, that the balcony existed in some other space than the party behind them. And so he found himself in the rain, taking another sip of wine before covering the exposed cup with his hand to prevent water from splashing into it, and thus onto anything else.

“I’ve not known Coruscant to rain,” he commented, looking up at the sky, feeling the cool drops of water on his skin, a familiar feeling but not from Coruscant. He’d been on the metropolitan planet countless times and not once had it rained, the systems in place preventing such a thing. But he supposed no planet could avoid nature.

He too leaned against the railing, letting his glass sit atop it, his hand still over it. He snorted at her mentioning Julia being upset with her moment in the rain. He didn’t think August would be upset with him. He wouldn’t even think of the hairdo as a waste of money, as rich as he was. And the water only darkened the red velvet of his suit. It was just water.

He looked when she told him to, following her gesture out to one of the buildings before them, and he did note the impressive halo. He’d never seen Coruscant being doused in rain before, buildings and ships and speeders in the distance looking to be covered in haze, the rain strong enough to give such an effect. The lights of the planet danced with the rain, a pretty sight, but not the pretty sight his gaze was set on.

“Impressive indeed,” His eyes settled on Mira. Her smile, the raindrops that settled in her hair. He liked the look on her, the ease displayed. Nothing could compare to it. He wondered if the coffee helped, or the absence of the Force.

The music from inside was quieter out here, muffled by distance and the sound of rain, but he could note the shift in song. He finished the rest of his wine in one big sip, letting the glass rest on the railing.

This was a dangerous game. It was becoming harder to deny that he felt anything for Mira, as much as he wanted to. It was getting harder to resist the urge for little touches. It was dangerous for him, for her. Attachments were tricky, a bad idea, and that was one thing he thought the Jedi got right. It was a loose end, one easy to dangle in front of someone. He knew that. And he’d remember those thoughts. Later.

Hux wasn’t a lightweight. And he had only one glass of wine. But still, he’d use intoxication as his excuse should anyone ask him why he offered his hand out to Mira. “Care to dance? It is a party after all.” He hardly knew how to dance. It was just another excuse.

 

[Lucyfer]

Paquin did the exact opposite of coming closer. She pulled into herself and he laughed a bit at the action. “So much better,” he agreed, the sarcasm on every syllable, even if he didn’t quite let that smile drop from his lips.

He relaxed, for the moment. Soaking it in. The kiss. The contact. Even far from her, he didn’t feel separated – and really, he wasn’t far. The Force still held them together, held them in the moment. It was so unfamiliar to him, but nonetheless, he accepted that feeling. He liked the feeling.

When her leg relaxed, he let one hand fall to rest atop her leg, near her ankle. He sighed at her question. “Darth Vader,” he said, “he lost everything, at the end, for sentiment.” He also became Vader for love, in a way. “But Luke wasn’t on his side."

If Luke had joined him, it wouldn’t have been the same. If Luke had just realized the potential to change and fix things on that side – to even usurp Palpatine – it all could have been so much better, for everyone. But, Luke hadn’t. And Kylo understood how sentiment could be wielded against someone.

Leia remained alive.

And Kylo knew that killing her would be…difficult, if it came to it.

Mira, as well, though he was certain he would be capable of that. She had betrayed them all. She would see all of them dead, easily. “You are with us. Snoke…might see reason in that.” But Kylo couldn’t say that with any affirmation. With any certainty.

Snoke may not. ‘So then what?’ Kylo didn’t know. They weren’t at that point, yet.

Lightly, he squeezed her leg, “And you belong here. Snoke knows that much,” as did Kylo, as did Ariel, and Gnaeus. Strange now, to think of it, that Mira had seen that first. “I just wish I’d seen it earlier,” wished he’d seen it before Mira. Wished he’d seen it even before that – years ago, on the Finalizer. She’d been there for how long? How had he never sensed it?

“It’s almost funny…we must have crossed paths before on the Finalizer, but we didn’t realize….”

Not what would become of them, not how they’d end up here, not how well they’d get along, after all that time. It was a large ship, but even so…it almost seemed ludicrous that she had been there for any amount of time, and he hadn’t noticed, now that he looked back. It was likely perfectly natural to overlook someone for so long who would end up becoming dear, but it felt strange all the same.

~***~

Of course Hux didn’t know it to rain – this didn’t surprise Mira in the least. It wasn’t something that occurred often, and it always seemed to be at night. In theory, when people would be indoors and asleep, even if no one slept in Coruscant. Perhaps her bad habits started there.

She could feel Hux’s gaze leave the building, but she kept her own on it. The rain was starting to be a bit chilling. It would have been easy enough to say so, to turn right back around and head in, but the coffee was warm, and she was arguing with herself. ‘You can’t keep this. You work with him. He needs to know.’ He could reject her, and that’d be the end of it.

Done.

Simple.

Rejection was what was needed, after all. What she should want.

And he spoke again, before she could finish her argument, and her gaze left the building to him. Hair not slicked back, but slick all the same with the rain. The velvet much darker now. And his hand. ‘Or maybe you shouldn’t say anything, ever.’ Because he was asking her to dance, and she knew with some twisting agony that a rejection wasn’t what would come from him.

And an excuse that she wasn’t exactly a dancer wouldn’t appease him. She knew basics. ‘I didn’t see too many people dancing.’ Mira set her cup down on the railing. ‘Are you going to ask Phasma to dance?’ She took the extended hand. ‘Shouldn’t we go back inside before…?’ Her other hand settled on his shoulder. The velvet didn’t retain its softness when damp, but she didn’t really care about that.

And then broke away. It wasn’t a jolt, it wasn’t a suddenness, but a slip. A lingering hold, an almost dance, before she drew her hand off his shoulder to step back, to draw her other hand out of his hold, as well. “I can’t.” It was quiet, too quiet, and she knew she was damned with the words.

‘Speak then. Speak and be damned.’

She didn’t know the words, she hadn’t tried them out before. It could have been a rush, a long-winded explanation to convince him this was stupid, but all that came was, “I adore you.” As if that should be every reason, every excuse, to not dance. Not ‘I can’t dance’. Not anything proper that could have saved the moment. Just that stupid statement.

Her feelings had stopped being professional, that professional respect mingling with the personal, and turning to adoration. A bias she was aware of. One she meant to find a way to speak to Hux about, in some professional way, to make sure it didn’t turn into anything. Just to be open with it. Just so he was aware. Just so….

‘You should have just danced.’ Danced, and pretended it was nothing, as if it wouldn’t follow her to sleep.

 

[KyloGlenn]

It all seemed to start with Darth Vader. The man Kylo idolized, or had. With Anakin, things had gotten confusing. The fact that they had to be intoxicated to see him probably hadn’t helped in absorbing any of that. Briefly, she wondered where Anakin floated about. If he had any wise words for their situation.

And Luke, she didn’t know much about either. She’d grown up on many planets and everyone seemed entirely split between whether he was fact or fiction. She knew now, that he was real. “I figure I should learn more about these things,” she mused, given how deep she quickly became in all things the Force. And she had the perfect resources, didn’t she?

Kylo expressed no certainty in how Snoke would react, and she didn’t expect him to. This was new for everyone, a situation that wasn’t predictable. ‘You belong here.’ It was nice to hear such a thing. Even better to feel it. “I do,” she agreed, softly. But she couldn’t help but wonder if it mattered if she belonged with them if Snoke didn’t want her there.

“Maybe if you’d come to the medbay for any of the things you were supposed to, we would’ve found each other sooner,” she nudged him with her foot. “Vaccines, physicals, anything at all.” If he ever had, it had to have been in the few times she wasn’t there. Which was incredibly rare. But even then, the times they’d probably been within feet of each other, unknowing as to what would become of them.

She wasn’t sure how he hadn’t felt her. Or how she hadn’t him, when she so clearly could now. Perhaps it was just because she was aware of it now. Or how Mira had been the one to discover it. Paquin harbored no positive feelings towards Mira, not after Ariel and Gnaeus, but she supposed she could thank her for that. Kylo wouldn’t have thought twice about her otherwise. And she never would have met Ariel and Gnaeus. These people she cared deeply for, her family now.

“It is strange to think. With how long we were both there...,” he’d been a presence since she began at the Order. All that time. “And to think I’d even avoided you, at times, and now…,” and now she wanted to be close to him, liked being around him. He’d become her friend. And something more than a friend.

-

Hux couldn’t place the exact moment when the pounding of his chest became louder than the beating of the rain on the building, on them. Sometime between the time he extended his hand and the time her hand slipped into his. He cursed himself for having such a reaction, for letting this become something that would garner a reaction.

He’d seen the signs long ago. He thought ignoring them would make this go away, make these completely unprofessional, impractical, and overall stupid feelings go away. But they didn’t.

If anything, they grew. But he had little intention of revealing that. He would allow that moment, make an excuse for it in his mind.

Her hand found his, her other resting on his shoulder. She radiated warmth despite the coolness of the rain. Her hands were warmed by her coffee, yes, but the way the chill in the air didn’t bother him in that moment, he knew it was more than just the coffee. Worst of all, he enjoyed the feeling.

His hand sought to wrap around hers, only for her to pull away before there was even a grasp for her to slip out of. His fingers only managed to brush against hers, closing into his own palm. His other hand had reached for her waist, but only grazed the fabric of her dress before he let his hand fall back to his side.

She was the one who wanted rejection, but he felt the sting of it. Rejection was a familiar feeling to the General, but it felt different this time. This time there was more than a feeling of disappointment. Almost hurt. But it was a fleeting emotion, as he came to understand hers.

The quietest ‘I can’t’ that he wasn’t sure he’d heard, at first. His brows furrowed as he watched her seemingly think of the words to say. And the words that came next didn’t surprise him, but that didn’t mean there was no effect on him. It was something they’d both come to feel, and that they both knew they couldn’t have. She phrased it well. Simple as it was, it sent floods of emotions he couldn’t process through him. He never was the best with expressing them, not after being raised by his father. And he couldn’t find himself repeating the words back to her, not in her words. He found his own. “As I do you,” he offered. Because he did, adore her. Trusted her, which he couldn’t say for many others. Felt for her in a way he knew was good for neither of them, not in their situation. But he did all the same.

“I understand.” He knew he couldn’t say ‘it’s just a dance’ because it wasn’t at this point, for either of them. But maybe the night could be one of indulgences. He drank his wine. He could dance with Mira. “Just here. Tonight, on the balcony. Then we can go in and never mention this again, as we should.” A closeness they shouldn’t allow, but...his hand reached for hers, softly trailing along her wrist to slip into her hand.

It could be like the rain. A rarity, in the minds of few, brief. Existing only in the night, gone by the morning.

 

[Lucyfer]

There was a lot to say about the Empire, and about Vader and Luke both, but Kylo wasn’t keen to get too deep into either right then. Or the Jedi teachings of attachment that had stifled much of his own growth, much growth in general. Paquin was aware of these things – he wasn’t sure how much more could really be said on that, or on Vader and Luke.

Of course, he would speak of them.

If only to help show the contrast of their situation, and how sentiment didn’t have to be bad, when it wasn’t misplaced.

He let the topic of Vader and Luke fade, as he rolled his eyes about the medbay, light smile touching his lips again at the nudge of her foot, and the implicit lecture in her words of him showing up. “I didn’t need to.” He healed from his wounds, and admittedly, Snoke preferred he suffer some, to strengthen up, to be able to work through any pain he felt.

It had probably helped him.

He could still keep his head while fighting with serious injuries. He wouldn’t mention that, though. He knew Paquin wouldn’t approve of Snoke’s particular training methods, even if Kylo did see the benefit here.

He did eye her as she suggested that she avoided him. He wasn’t surprised, but, “What did you hear about me that made you avoid me?”

He made a point to ask with that lazy smirk on his lips, so she wouldn’t take it as an interrogative question, or something to be wary of how she answered.
It wasn’t as if he was oblivious.

He imagined it was the same things everyone said – his temper, his violence. They were known throughout the Order. He’d destroyed enough machinery for that to be known in the Order, and he’d seen Stormtroopers walk the opposite direction as soon as they saw him.

~***~

There was another perk to the void stone that almost seemed a curse; Mira wasn’t certain what it was that Hux was feeling, except by his expression. She didn’t know the sting of the rejection. She also couldn’t feel his determination, in that moment, to take something he couldn’t have – if only for a moment. For a dream.

‘It will follow us. Don’t you know that?’ Mira wanted to remind him how foolish it was, even as his words echoed in her head, and his trailing fingers warmed her back into stepping forward, into clasping his hand. ‘And we can’t, we can’t, we can’t.’

Her mother’s mantra, back to haunt her, always can’t.

Mira knew she should stop this. She should be cruel and leave him where he stood, because this would hurt them. They wouldn’t forget this, and it would have to be addressed again, before they found themselves in some other foolish situation, before one of them thought it could be. Before Hux forgot how volatile the Force was when it came to Mira, or Mira thought she had it under control.

Before….

In the midst of worrying thoughts she had still returned her hand to his shoulder as she held his hand in her other.

How could she echo his words of ‘just tonight’ when she knew it would be a lie? She was drawn back too easily. “How long does one dance last?” She knew the answer was generally as long as the song, but she could suspend her knowledge for a moment, for longer than a moment, since she was suspending it not to correct Hux on how this was going to turn out.

There was the small chance things would go back to normal, even as the warmth started to wash through her with her tentative closeness, even as she reminded herself there was no need to panic or stress. No need to flee immediately – with the stone, Hux was safe.

She was safe.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin couldn’t help the incredulous expression her face adopted when he said he didn’t need to seek medical attention. “Everyone needs to,” Paquin insisted. Otherwise she wouldn’t have had a job. She lightly shook her head, only playfully disapproving. They couldn’t go back in time. But they could go forward, and she could keep an unusually close eye on the Knights. She was there if they got hurt.

Or if Ariel’s kidneys failed.

Paquin tilted her head, eyeing him with the slightest wariness when he inquired what she’d heard about him. But that smirk of his warmed her, eased her. And she was sure he could have asked her any question in the galaxy and she would have found a way to answer it. She shrugged a shoulder, “I’m sure you know,” It really wasn’t like his reputation was any secret.

“Everyone had much to say about your temperament and little else.” Not that anyone knew of anything else. Kylo was simply a figure of destruction and intimidation to a majority in the Order.

“The stormtroopers, the younger ones, they have a few nicknames and some scary stories about you they like to pass around,” mostly they were just tales, ones older kids used to scare the youngest. And Paquin was a bit amused by some. But all tales had some truth to them, didn’t they?

And many others had stories, perhaps some exaggerated or completely false, about their tumultuous encounters with Kylo Ren. “Not that some things were necessarily untrue,” he did have something of a temper and tended to be aggressive. “And I was just a medic,” a fairly expendable asset, should she had ended up in the wrong place. So, she avoided becoming a victim by avoiding him.

“But if you ask me, I think they sold you quite a bit short. You’re not just your anger or violence. You…” Paquin shook her head, cheeks turning pink. She cut herself off, then, before she could gush about him to him. “You’re much more than your reputation. I learned that quickly. And I’m lucky I get to know that.” She had been quick to warm up to Kylo, somehow, after spending some time with him.

-

Hux felt an undeniable sense of victory when her hand accepted his, her other returning to his shoulder. He knew he shouldn’t. That he should be worried, that he should think of all the things that could and would go wrong because they allowed something like this. But in that moment, he hardly cared about anything else, his hand finding her waist, ushering her just a bit closer.

He, too, knew this was not something they could just forget. This would follow him, them, back inside. Beyond just the night. ‘Just tonight’ might have been a little lie he’d told her.

He could figure it out later. Manage his emotions better with a clear head. Not when there was the influence of wine, though that was just an excuse he made up. If anything, the closeness between the two of them, the way his skin tingled where their hands met, and with the void stone he knew it wasn’t anything to do with the Force. The warmth that encompassed him despite the chill of the air, of the rain. It all made him feel more intoxicated than alcohol ever could.

‘Well.’ He was damned, surely. Maybe he’d screwed the both of them, too, just for this small desire.

“As long as we want it to,” Hux offered as an answer to her question. Even if they couldn’t, really. They couldn’t spend too much time with just each other. “A song. Or two.” ‘Or three, or four.’ They had appearances to make, people to talk to.

Which reminded him, “Or until my father hunts me down.” He was sure his father would just love to stumble upon them. And be able to do nothing about it, now that Hux ranked superior to him. A fact the ginger was smug about, but still. Hux decided he didn’t want to think about that, in the moment.

“Are you sick of my dancing already?” He teased, allowing a grin in the moment, no attempt to suppress it, as if there was no risk of anyone seeing. Even if the doors were open and anyone inside could look out. “I know I’m not much of a dancer,” he knew basic things. Like swaying, he could do. A step here or there. Going around in a circle. He hadn’t done much of it. Dancing wasn’t really an aspect of war.

But then again, the point of this wasn’t so much the dancing as it was a chance for the slightest bit of forbidden intimacy. As much as they could without turning it into something it couldn’t be.

 

[Lucyfer]

Paquin was not wary for long, and her first statement was no surprise. At least she didn’t assume he was ignorant, but still, he shrugged his shoulders, and waited for her to elaborate a bit. He may know, but he remained curious. It wasn’t as if anyone came to him, to tell him what others were saying. He just picked up things.

It was, mostly, about his temperament.

His anger.

He did arch a brow, wondering if he should ask about the nicknames that the Stormtroopers had, but he decided not to. He didn’t really want to know. He had known of ‘Jedi Killer’. There were likely far worse, and less friendly, ones amongst the ranks. He didn’t know if they would be just as insulting as ‘Jedi Killer’…he took it for mockery. He hadn’t killed any Jedi. He had just killed trainees.

Enough stories, and enough nicknames, to make Paquin concerned that she would end up on the wrong side of his anger. She had once believed in them enough to avoid him, though she knew more now.

He could hardly hold it against her, and he didn’t want to. That wasn’t his intent, and that wry smile broadened as her cheeks flushed again, confessing that she knew he was more than all of that. He straightened one leg out a bit to nudge her own foot with his as she flushed and stated she was pleased to get to know him, “I’m glad you think so,” what others thought didn’t matter so much.

He straightened out his other leg, as well. “It is a part of me.” That anger. That aggression. It wasn’t going to go away. It was how he fought. It was how he knew to channel the Force. It gave him his strength. He didn’t intend to turn this into a lecture on the Force and practices, but only to confirm the truth she knew – and in a way, to express some understanding of why he had been avoided. “I know Stormtroopers would turn in another direction if they saw me approaching. So I knew what they thought.”

Literally, sometimes.

“Will you be all right with that?”

He was more than his reputation, she said – but he was also, very much, his reputation. He’d shown that again in the cantina. Perhaps he had refrained from smashing the idiot’s head in who thought to try and buy Paquin a drink, but that was partially because of the mission to meet Brendol.

He knew he still wanted to do that, and he didn’t truly see anger ever leaving him, or ever not being a source of power for him. Not after all these years.

~***~

Mira had lived her life learning to mask and control her emotions. Changing that wouldn’t happen overnight, even if a part of wished she knew how to better express them right then. Of course, that would have only made things worse, in a way. To show Hux how it could be, if she didn’t have the Force.

But she certainly did feel the rush of so-called butterflies through her, even with just simple steps and swaying. With Hux’s hand on her waist, and entwined in her own. It was such little contact, and she almost hated how so little could feel like so much. Stars, she had been deprived. ‘And now you know more than you ought.’ That she was deprived, for one.

That she didn’t like being deprived.

That she smiled as he did, shaking her head a little, ignoring his comment of his father. Brendol could wait. He could wait an entire year. A lifetime. Mira was already well aware of how Hux felt about his father, and she certainly didn’t have much good to think of the man.

He could wait until after the dance.

Longer.

“No, I was only concerned it would end too soon,” she answered. “I’m not much of a dancer, either, but I can follow this.”

Not that it was much to follow. But even she knew that wasn’t the point, either. There was just a craving for contact in something that they could both, easily, lie about or dismiss. Someone had certainly glanced out and noticed them, after all. Possibly multiple somebodies.

With her luck, Terex.

With his luck, his father.

It still wasn’t enough. ‘Well this is a lie anyways. And you’re in heels. It’s slick. You can’t dance, either.’ Her mind added reason upon reason for one way to get a bit closer, each more ridiculous than the last, given the fact she was maintaining a semblance of poise in the rain. Yet, she didn’t want his hand just on her waist. She wanted his arm around her. She wanted to be against him.

It was such a ridiculously simple gesture, one she could likely pull off with Finn with no pretense, but Hux? Hux it had to be an ordeal, a lie, to play into their future lies, that were going to lead to future problems.

But it was future Mira’s problem.

Present Mira wanted more, and so in a turn, she didn’t move her foot quite enough. She stumbled over it in the step forward, not sudden, but an inevitable stumble forward all the same. She wasn’t trying to knock him down, just…close some distance. Accidentally. ‘You’re an idiot.’

 

[KyloGlenn]

The smile that encroached on her features when he nudged her was a bashful one, her eyes averted, suddenly interested in his movement. Her hand fell to his leg, running up and back down before she settled on fiddling with folds and creases in the fabric of his pants, busying herself to let her face cool off. She was sure looking at him and his broadened grin would only make her burn more.

Though, her expression shifted. Her eyebrows knit together and her gaze returned to him. She thought the answer to his question was obvious, but still, “Yes, of course,” she had no delusions of who Kylo was. He wasn’t all consumed by his anger in the way some painted him to be, but he had his reputation for a reason. She’d been around him, seen his temper. And she understood it served a purpose to him.

It served a purpose to Snoke, too.

She couldn’t say it didn’t worry her. She was worried it wasn’t healthy for him. And she couldn’t agree with the way he directed his anger towards people who cared about him, and who he cared about. Even if Ariel and Gnaeus were used to it. But, “I understand what it is to you. It’s a part of you. It’s not all of you, but it’s something that makes you who you are. And I like you.” That included the more volatile parts of him. There was no nitpicking what aspects of him that she liked. She adored every bit of him. It wasn’t a choice, but if it was, she’d still take all of him.

She abandoned the fabric of his pants and sought out his hand instead, once again. Instead of intertwining their fingers, she opted for fiddling with his, following the outline of his hand. “I’m alright with that,” she clarified, in case she needed to.

“As long as I’m never the target of your anger,” and she didn’t mean arguing like they had before. In their relationship and it’s growing complexity, there was sure to be disagreements. Though she wouldn’t mind never arguing with him again. She didn’t like him being upset with her or vice versa. But she meant the physical kind.

Not that she ever thought or felt like he would. Not in the time she’d really known him. Not even when they were mad at each other.

-

This was a horrible lie. A sweet, horrible lie and they just kept digging themselves a deeper grave with every lie they added on top of it. And the worst part was, the more they lied to themselves the more he found it worth it.

Every little touch, or smile, or glance in his direction and he found himself willing to lie for the rest of his lifetime. ‘You can’t.’ He didn’t want that reminder filling his head, so he ignored it. ‘Just tonight.’ And he’d take advantage of just that night.

He knew there was nothing stopping them. Nothing but themselves and what they’d convinced themselves of. It was against everything Hux was taught. Emotions, connections. These warm feelings, they were all weaknesses. They’d hinder him, hurt him. Whoever looked out on that balcony, saw them that close together. Smiling, holding one another. They could use it against him. Exploit the weak point that was her.

Snoke would use it. His father would use it. He didn’t want to put her through that.

No attachments, just like the Jedi.

His mind was screaming at him to stop and he willfully ignored it. And it left his mind the second she ‘stumbled’, something he saw through once he had a second to process it. She had been holding her own well enough this entire time. But, that wouldn’t be obvious to any onlookers. Another little lie.

Instinctively, his arm wrapped around her to keep her steady, hold her up as her body crashed into his. His hand splayed across her waist. He reveled in the way her body felt against him, the all encompassing warmth she gave off. “Void, are we stupid,” he mumbled under his breath, just for them to hear. But the smile never left his face. His arm only tightened around her, to press her closer to him, and to keep her close. He had little intention of letting her step back. “Maybe you’re a worse dancer than I,” he teased, the knowing in his tone.

It had been a long time since he’d been close to someone like this. And then, it wasn’t the same. This...this was something he craved. Even as she was pressed against him, all he could think of was how much he wanted it, more of it. More of her.

He hadn’t noticed he’d stopped dancing in that time. That he’d just been holding her. And gently, he swayed. “When was the last time you danced like this?” Had it been as long for her as it was for him? “I think it’s been over a decade for me…,” he mused, the memory just as distant.

 

[Lucyfer]

Paquin did not hesitate in answering. She did not keep her gaze averted to his pants as her hands played with them, but she looked right at him as she told him ‘of course’. Kylo felt some relief wash through him at that. He didn’t know if it would hold, but at least Paquin had the intent to accept him as he was, and not try to make any drastic changes, or hope for drastic changes.

It seemed everyone had looked for that his whole life. Even Snoke.

But Paquin liked him. All of him.

And she reached ahead for his hand, which he surrendered to her, observing as she seemed to play with it, rather than hold it. Strange. It felt nice, though, all the ways her finger traced the outline of his hand.

Paquin didn’t want to be on the receiving end of his anger. He didn’t imagine anyone did, and though he couldn’t imagine it happening – he’d also seen his parents argue too often to think it was improbable or impossible.

He bit his bottom lip briefly as he thought of it, before folding his hand over Paquin’s, “I will try to keep my anger within…civil ranges, when we do inevitably argue,” with him? It was inevitable and he knew it. He had too much of his father in him. Too much of his mother. They were both stubborn, hot-heads. His mother moreso.

Even if she might not admit that.

He knew he wouldn’t want to hurt Paquin, but he hadn’t wanted to hurt people and he still did. He had gotten better. A lot better. “I have better control now, than I have in the past, and I would not want to hurt you.” As, he suspected, in any argument or fight they had, Paquin wouldn’t want to hurt him.

He let her hand go.

It had turned serious quick. And not light. But it felt important to bring it up; perhaps it was new, but was it wrong to assume they both harbored thoughts of something serious and long-term? Assuming Snoke allowed it in the first place. He wasn't quite sure how to put it back on something light, so he asked a stupid question instead, "You seem rather interested in my hand - I don't suppose you can read the lines in them?"

~***~

‘Yes, yes we are.’ Mira could not argue with Hux’s statement about their intelligence, or lack thereof, even if she willed herself to think it was a mere reference to their decision to dance in the rain, when it would have been so much better to stay inside. She didn’t attempt to push away from him, just straightened herself against him.

Let her head rest on his shoulder, as the hand on his other shoulder slacked a bit, and moved to his upper arm instead.


Still, she chuckled at his comment, “Maybe. Or it’s the heels,” she would let blame fall there just as easily, even if it was all a lie. She could blame a thousand things, but it was all her, right then, and her desire to be closer to him. To see how it felt in his arms, with his grip tight around her. She liked it.

It would haunt her, but for the moment, she was convincing herself it was worth it.

He swayed, and Mira only realized then they hadn’t been moving. She didn’t stop it, and didn’t move to put herself at any further length, to accommodate any sort of actual dancing. It was all a lie anyways, certainly there could be a lie for this. Somewhere. “Never quite like this,” she allowed.

Never held this close, never just swaying, though she wondered if Hux had meant that. If he’d truly danced with someone like this before.

She exhaled. He should. He should have someone he could hold close and cherish, someone who would be able to return that with no complications. “But Kevan used to drag me out from Wild Space and remind me there was civilization. I’m sure the last time was with him, maybe five or six years ago,” she couldn’t be certain.

Time was a bit of a blur in Wild Space.

But Kevan had tried to keep her…well, human. Though she didn’t want to dwell on him. “Was it your promotion?” She asked, tone remaining soft, the moment far too fragile. “The reason for the last dance?” She swayed with him still, but didn’t pull her head back to look at him. If she did that, she’d start to pull away. She’d come to her senses.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin could have sat there for hours, watching him think and bite at those lips she became quickly fond of. With her hands in his or the other way around. But the more she wanted it, the more reminders came that they couldn’t just sit there in each other’s presence for that long. Eventually, something would come. Hux or their other two companions. And they’d have to leave, the question of whether they’d be able to return to it up in the air.

She ignored the frustrating thoughts, as best she could. It was an issue for the future.

A smile pulled at Paquin’s lips at the mention of their inevitable disagreements. She, too, knew it was unavoidable. She’d accept that. “All I ask is that you try.” Neither of them wanted to hurt one another, she knew that. As long as he never had any intent, that’s all she could ask of him.

The conversation had taken a serious turn. And perhaps the subject could have waited until they knew this was something that would continue. That the topic would even matter. But it fit. Though, Paquin wasn’t unhappy when he shifted the conversation to something silly, simpler.

She giggled, her cheeks burning again as she shook her head, “No, I can’t,” she pulled his hand closer to her, almost protectively, her hand finally encompassing his. No, part of it was that she was handsy, fidgety. A reason she’d liked her job, her hands were always busy. And why fiddle with her own hands when she had his? Another part, she liked the intimacy of it. She had plenty of physical contact with people, but nothing like this, like what she had with him.

Nothing with the same meaning or connection. “Though, hands can tell a lot about a person. But I’m just…studying them,” just because she could. Because he let her touch him, let her commit the lines and inconsistencies, the feeling of him to memory. “I like your hands,” she declared, her thumb stroking his wrist. Just another thing she liked.

“I’m sorry, if it’s strange. I’ve never really given affection like this. Or been given it.” And maybe she was trying to give and get as much as she could. “I think I’m beginning to understand why Ariel and Gnaeus encouraged this so much.” And surely they’d be excited over her and Kylo’s agreement to try whatever this was, whatever they could call it.

-

She straightened against him, and she rested her head against his shoulder, sending some almost indescribable feeling through him. Well, at least he wouldn’t know what words to use. Warmth, some sort of fullness—contentment, maybe—and yet, longing. It was overwhelming and calming. All at once.

Hux bowed his head, lowering it to rest against the top of hers, but he paused. Hesitated. Thinking too much. But he gave in. Resting his cheek against the top of her head, the wetness of her hair. The tension of his body melting away, into her. The arm that had held her tight against him relaxed, but still held her close, his fingers clutching the fabric of her dress.

What lie would they come up for this? He was just protecting her hair from the rain, surely. Her already wet hair. With his own face. ‘Stupid.’ He inhaled, breathing in the scent of the rain. Of Mira. The smell of her, coffee, whatever whisky they’d put in the drink hailing from his home-world. His eyes closed, blinking for a second longer than normal as he reveled in the feelings.

He listened to her, her voice slightly muffled by the sound of rain and their acquired position. He listened to her tell the tale of Kevan, who he did his best not to tense at the mention of. He was still a traitor, but one that meant something to Mira. Even with how convoluted that situation became, he said nothing. “Too long ago,” he noted. “You fit well in civilization,” his tone was light, but he meant it. Neither of them fairly cared for social interaction, he knew that. But she handled it well, and as far as he was concerned, civilization could benefit from Mira.

She’d been wasted in Wild Space.

Mira questioned him in return, and he hummed in response. “Yes. About a decade ago now,” and it somehow felt longer than that, despite the years in between passing by in a blur. He was reminded of how young he’d been to be promoted. And how he was still young for the position, yet felt older than he was. At some points he’d even forgotten his own age. Birthdays missed, ignored, out of mind. “Something of a celebration for it. More of a formality, really.” He mumbled.

“Never quite like this,” he echoed her words. No, nothing had ever been quite like this. Never even came close, physically or in feeling. Not with any man or woman. Not even with Dee’lea all those years ago, the closest thing thing that could be compared to the closeness he felt now. “You should feel so lucky,” he teased, half-heartedly.

No, she shouldn’t. Because all that could come from this was a disaster on some level.

 

[Lucyfer]

Kylo would nod to her request. He would absolutely try not to harm her, and try to keep his disagreements civil. He knew he should probably do that more often than he did, anyways, but he could at least keep it focused here, with her. To remember to step back when she was involved. At least, he hoped.

He was easily distracted by her taking the bait of the new conversation, her cheeks flaring red again as she denied knowing how to read the lines of his hand. She drew his hand closer, and he couldn’t help but move towards her, not pulling his hand back as he shifted forward and pulled his knees back, and underneath himself, so he could examine his own hand in her grip.

He didn’t know what was so fascinating about it, but then again, his hand had been attached to him his whole life.

Unlike Gnaeus. Or Luke.

Perhaps there was some reason to not take it for granted.

It was strange, but he wouldn’t say that. He didn’t want to discourage it, “It’s not like I know any better,” he could at least offer that, and wonder if that was, indeed, why Ariel and Gnaeus encouraged it. They were both idiots with limited experiences in proper affection and relationships.

He didn’t comment on that, though.

Instead, he reached for one of her hands, to hold it alongside his outstretched one, amusing himself with the thought of studying hands. Hers were, of course, much smaller. They were softer, but they weren’t exactly smooth, even beyond the standard lines. He didn’t know how much medical tools came into play, but he suspected they’d done their work to callous her thumbs a bit.

The lightsaber would soon add more to that as she worked with it more. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Ariel and Gnaeus couldn’t have known how much time we’d spend just looking at hands.” Okay, maybe he was going to comment on it, “I think they’d be disappointed in us,” and he didn’t think he cared much, “but you are right. Hands tell a lot. About lifestyle. I always know someone who’s familiar with weapons by their hands. You’re getting there,” he teased, brushing his own thumb across her palm, towards her thumb.

~***~

Mira knew there’d be no lying about this afterwards, but she would accept that. Feeling him relax was worth that, if nothing else. How often did General Hux get to relax for even a moment? Not often. And it would mean addressing this, setting things right in the morning, or the near future, at least…but for now, she would tell herself it was all right. For the moment, there were no consequences.

Even if she didn’t belong in civilization. ‘You did well in the Senate.’ That voice had too much hope; it suggested she could do what she’d never been able to do – enjoy emotion without the Force getting in the way.

She wouldn’t humor it, even as she listened to Hux elaborate on his own small history with dance. A formality. And never quite like this. ‘And who was it you danced with?’ Would he even remember their name?

She didn’t care, right then, who it was.

Her own smile at his comment was masked by that closeness they shared. Did she feel lucky? Yes. No. His own tease was half-hearted, easy enough to hear, to know, he was thinking about the consequences. Reluctant as they both were to face them. “I do.” In the end, she was lucky – lucky to know him, lucky to be involved in all of this, lucky to see that Hux could feel. Perhaps it was misplaced, but…she was lucky to be the one, anyways.

Even if she had to let it go. The thoughts were too invasive now, even through the warmth of him, even with the pressure of his cheek against hers. It was tempting to think that she shouldn’t move away for the sake of the disturbance it would cause, but she did. She stepped back, and moved her hand down to his chest to press against him.

Away.

It wasn’t hastened, and she didn’t pull completely out of his hold, but enough for there to be space between their bodies again. Enough for the chill of the rain and wind to be bothersome again, and for her to want to just step back to him. ‘Stay.’

Stay near, or stay back, her mind wasn’t clear on it, but she stayed back. They were already going to cause a scene for how wet they were when they returned to reality. “I do feel lucky.” She reiterated, to soften that moving away. “But I believe we should…pause for now.” Stop wasn’t a word she could form right then. Pause sounded more hopeful, even where it shouldn’t be humored.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin was happy to let him maneuver her hands, for him to engage in her odd activity of affection. Even though she knew it was probably more amusing to him than anything. That she found more interest in it. She too shifted onto her knees, not letting go of Kylo as she did so. She inched forward, worming her way until her knees touched his.

He did comment on the hand thing, and she couldn’t have turned any more pink than she already was. She wasn’t offended, she was aware it probably was strange. Something she was used to being considered. And in this case, she didn’t care if she was.Her brows furrowed, and she stared at him in all seriousness, “What else would we look at?” Only, she wasn’t serious, and it didn’t last. “Well, I’m not disappointed in us,” she offered.

They talked, they kissed, they touched. There were still things that needed to be answered that neither of them could, but Paquin would call it a success nonetheless. She was happy.

His thumb brushed across her palm, leaving a warm tingle in its wake. She smiled, scrunching her nose. That was another thing she had to work on, weapons. Her lightsaber. “I try. I think I can only hope to compare to you, though,” she encompassed his hand with hers. His hands were rougher. Worn, calloused, strong. Clearly developed over time. ‘Relentless,’ was one word that came to mind.

And he was still capable of sharing gentle touches with her, which felt nice. Which she appreciated. She brought his hand closer, maneuvering so she could press her lips to the back of his hand. “Thank you for indulging me,” her and her strange little fixation. “If anything makes you uncomfortable, you can tell me,” she encouraged. Navigating things like this was new to her, and she didn’t want to do anything he didn’t enjoy as much as she did.

She squeezed his hands gently, “Do you want to come back with me?” She asked as she put a bit of her weight on him as she stood, using his hands to stabilize herself. Back to Ariel and Gnaeus, she meant. They had to return to them for one reason or another, better that than them coming in during their intimate time. But Paquin wasn’t sure Kylo would want to join her, not at the risk of seeing Yoel, even if she figured he’d either left or decided she wasn’t worth the trouble.

-

Hux resisted snorting a laugh at her initial ‘I do’. She shouldn’t feel lucky. Neither of them should feel so, rather unlucky, if they really looked at their situation. But that didn’t stop them both from feeling like they’d struck some sort of fortune with each other. Unconsciously, he pressed his cheek further into her.

Even though it was short lived.

She was the one to come to her senses first, her hand coming between them, putting distance between them. He wanted to tighten his grip, to live in the feeling for just a moment longer. But he didn’t. He let his arms unravel from around her as space was created, immediately feeling cold in a few senses of the word. Immediately he missed the feeling, the warmth of her. Just her.

His hands lingered around her waist, “I agree. It would be for the best,” he could feel her wording was hopeful, but he was sure the both of them knew they shouldn’t entertain...whatever they were doing, whatever this was, outside of that night. Outside of the balcony or the rain. But...they didn’t have to acknowledge it that night.

One hand left her waist, raising to her face. His thumb brushed gently under her eye, over where her makeup had been slightly askew by being wet and pressed against him. He let his hand rest there for just a moment, a moment longer than he should have. And then his hand fell to his side, and his other hand slid from her waist. “We should get back inside, before we draw too much attention,” like they hadn’t already. Hux knew he’d be hearing things tomorrow. Hell, he’d hear things just back inside. He wondered if this would slip, if there’d be something written about it when he woke up in the morning. He wouldn’t be surprised.

Lying was certainly out of the question now, in some aspects.

“And before either of us catches a cold. Surely the Tarkins have towels somewhere,” because they were wet, and it was cold, even if they hadn’t felt the effects of it when they were pressed against each other. His own velvet suit was heavy, the slightest bit uncomfortable. He didn’t imagine her dress was much better.

He parted from her then, fully. He returned to the railing, to grab the glasses they’d abandoned. Pouring out the water that had gathered in them, for at least he intended to get another glass of wine before he set off on his next task. Finding his father to see what he wanted. And Hux took the moment he faced away from Mira to gather his composure. To turn the General back on before they went back inside. As much as he’d rather not.

 

[Lucyfer]

The lightness of the moment was unusual, but not unwelcome to Kylo Ren as Paquin’s knees brushed his own, and she tried to question what else they’d look at. What else they’d do. Even he wasn’t that naïve, nor was she, as her serious façade broke apart. “Neither am I,” he agreed. He was, perhaps, slightly disappointed in himself for allowing this, but he wasn’t sure if that was disappointment, or fear.

So many of his emotions were hard to untangle from the mess of what he’d been led to believe. And so many mingled together, like all of his feelings towards Leia. Towards Han. He hadn’t really learned well how to define things outside of anger.

This didn’t make him angry.

They touched briefly on weapons, and though Paquin doubted herself, Kylo didn’t. She’d never do well with his style, that much was true, but there were other styles she could learn and master. Other ways to wield the blade. Stars knew there was more than one way to use a gun, and all sorts of those out there, from sniper to slugthrowers. Still, he didn’t speak to that. He wasn’t all that interested in it right then, even if it did showcase a difference in their hands.

He didn’t want her to end up with hands half as rough as his own, though he knew he’d like them regardless. They were still so much smaller than his, and so easy to capture in his grip. “I will,” Kylo wouldn’t be shy. “This doesn’t bother me,” he answered, though. It was strange, perhaps, but it was far from bothersome as she lifted his hand and pressed her fingertips to the back of his hand. The color shifted slightly under the touch, and he just watched with that slight amusement as she indulged.

And she rose, squeezing his hands. He lifted them to follow her rise, before he’d sigh and force himself to follow, standing up, keeping his own hands locked in hers.

He knew they’d have to leave this place, “No, not really,” was still his first answer, before he looked off from her, out of the viewport, trying to accept it, “But I suppose it won’t really matter if I wait, or if I follow with you, and given the choice I’d rather walk back with you than without you.” He couldn’t stay cooped up in the ship with these thoughts, and Ariel and Gnaeus were going to know immediately from Paquin.

Even if, for their own sake, they shouldn’t know.

Then again, maybe they’d have ideas about how to deal with Snoke. They were the idiots who thought this would work.

He would drop one of her hands, but keep hold of the other, “I make no promises about not harming either of them, though.” It was said as mostly a joke; he knew to expect teasing from both Gnaeus and Ariel over this matter, but Ariel would be the worst of the two.

~***~

Shattering their hopeful delusions could wait until morning, or afternoon. It could wait until daylight, and clear skies, clean light, when there could be no hiding from the reality of their situation. That they were even able to put it aside was likely some small miracle in the moment, though it didn’t feel like one to Mira.

It almost felt like a betrayal as Hux lifted his hand to wipe away at stains just near her eye, and let the touch linger. The rest of her might go cold, but she doubted either cheek would find a chill soon, even in missing his touch. The memory would warm them, again and again.

She wouldn’t lean into it. She wouldn’t give into other thoughts of reaching out, of the brief glimpse down from his eyes to his lips, wouldn’t dare to reach beyond what they could brush away.

Like the small stain.

There was a terrible relief when he moved away, and all of him was gone from her. A terrible agony, but she focused on the relief, the drop in tension, and turned towards the railing as well, where her own drink was.

She didn’t think another would be advisable, but something without liquor may be. “I’m sure they do,” she agreed with the thought of towels. Somewhere, anyways, though she didn’t think it’d do her much good. It wouldn’t dry the dress, for one. Hux’s suit was likely not to be remedied anytime soon, either.

Mira wondered if she might be able to bow out early, but she imagined Julia wouldn’t let it be that easy. Perhaps she could change back into her uniform. The Force would help her some, she was used to manipulating small molecules like water. She couldn’t help him while he had the stone, though the thought occurred to her to ask, before she bit down on one cheek and quelled the query.

She walked forward and reached to take her own cup from him, careful about where her fingers were. Careful not to graze. “Maybe they’ll let you put your uniform back on,” she offered instead. “I’ll go in first,” either way, it would likely benefit them to part at this point, and not go in together.

She’d figure out about the uniform and other issues when she got inside, for herself. Or just make a show of something absolutely inane the Force could do; stars knew the Tarkins liked a show.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin smiled a bit at his sigh, her grip on his hands tightening as he rose, as if he actually needed her to help him up. He didn’t, but she pretended her assistance was useful, anyway.

Paquin didn’t want to leave either, really. His gaze turned to the viewport, but she settled on looking up at him. No, she wanted to stay here with him. Where it was quiet and just the two of them. Once they stepped out of the ship, she knew they’d have to face reality, whatever consequences or duties waited for them. His voice drew her from her thoughts.

She sighed, but it turned into a smile when he decided to come with her. She’d feel better walking back with him than leaving him on his own with his thoughts. And now she didn’t have to face Gnaeus and Ariel alone. They both knew Ariel would be the worst.

She giggled at his lack of promise. She knew it was mostly a joke, “I wouldn’t expect you to. Besides, I think they would know what to anticipate from you,” based on the few times Paquin had seen what their teasing had turned into. Even as lighthearted as it had been, usually. Still, she couldn’t see where teasing, in their situation, could turn upsetting.

With one hand now free, she raised it to run over his shoulder, moving to the back of his neck to guide him down to her. She stood on the tips of her toes to meet his lips halfway. Quick but no less sweet. If she’d tried anything more she knew she wouldn’t want to leave. But still, she wanted one more kiss concealed in the safety of the ship, uncertain of when or if they'd have a chance to again.

Paquin let her hand fall, still holding onto his hand with her other one. She steadied herself back on her feet, breathed. “Okay,” she gently pulled on his hand to bring him along on the short walk to the cantina where the other half of the Knights waited.

Anxiously, excitedly, at least in Ariel’s case. At some point, she didn’t feel that overwhelming hurt she did when Paquin left them, but she didn’t really feel anything following that. So, it was up in the air until she felt them, at first. And then saw them both, together. Ariel squealed, reaching across the table to hit the good arm of her companion before she herself moved to slip into the seat next to him, to force Paquin and Kylo to sit together.

-

“Maybe,” Hux mused at the idea of being able to put his uniform back on. He’d certainly favor that. “I wouldn’t put it past Tarkin to prefer me in a wet suit, though.” Good thing was, Hux could make his own decisions. Perhaps he’d change into his uniform, find his father, and leave after that. Not much of an appearance at the party on his part, but he wasn’t a politician. He represented nothing in the Senate. This get together wasn’t for him.

He sighed. Part of him didn’t want to part from her. Another found being with her almost painful. Being around her, missing the feeling of her. Resisting wanting to just pull her close again. “Alright,” he settled with her plan. At this point, he didn’t think it mattered much whether they went in together or not. They’d been seen much to close together already. But, perhaps it would look better to be separate. And he wouldn’t mind a second to gather himself before he went back in. “I’ll find you later,” he told her, but didn’t elaborate on when later was.

Maybe later that night, to hand off the stone. Or leave it with Phasma or Finn, and maybe in the morning he’d see her. Maybe the following afternoon. He wouldn’t admit it, out loud or to himself, but he wanted to avoid confronting the reality of this. That his feelings were more than friendly or professional, but that they could be nothing more than friends or coworkers.

No, he’d hold off on thinking about that. Another drink was in store.

He’d wait for Mira to go inside first, watch her leave him and their moment. He heard Julia Tarkin’s voice greet her, and he figured waiting until the sound retreated would he a good sign as to when it was safe for him to go inside.

“For your hair, at least,” Julia wasn’t quick to jump on Mira when she came in, but was there before she trekked through the whole apartment dripping water and attracting attention. Not that she and Hux already hadn’t. They’d garnered Julia’s at least. There was certainly more. She offered out a towel, she had one for Hux, too, but they opted to separate. “The dress might be hopeless,” of course, Julia didn’t think of the Force as an option. It wasn’t a familiarity like it was to Mira. She thought more along the lines of what else she could put Mira in that wasn’t a uniform.

Julia occupying Mira gave Hux a good opportunity to slip past them and avoid sparing her one last glance, or the urge to give her a fleeting touch, knowing it would be the last one, too. No, it was better he didn’t, and that he didn’t think about it anymore.

His father would be a good distraction. Aggravating, but a distraction.

 

[Lucyfer]

In theory, Ariel and Gnaeus should know what to expect from him. Then again, Kylo hadn’t even expected having a relationship in his life, so he was on unfamiliar ground. He’d try to keep himself in check for that.

Which, may or may not be easier after the unexpected kiss and the rush of heat through his body, a sudden flood of it by the nearly-chaste kiss that Paquin offered as a conclusion to their moments alone. He had wanted to deepen it, to take more time, but she pulled away.

He didn’t approve.

He completely approved.

It left him a bit bitter to leave the ship, but all the same, he would be pulled along as the color faded from him with the reminder of where he was.

What they were doing. ‘Wasting time.’ Snoke wouldn’t have approved of that thought, but it felt like that was all they were doing of late.

At least that thought helped to cool his blood in one respect, even if it threatened to spike his anger again. As they came into the cantina, he easily found where Ariel and Gnaeus were. The flash of red hair and movement made that obvious as Ariel went to sit by Gnaeus, who looked a bit disgruntled to have to slide all the way over in his booth without much warning.

Kylo considered walking right back out, but he didn’t. He had to bite the bullet, so to speak, and get this over with long before they ever saw Snoke again. He didn’t need them finding out in closer proximity. And, he supposed, it’d be rude to leave Paquin to fend for herself with these two.

He didn’t drop her hand, though.

A glance found Yoel still at the bar, and found him looking disgusted at the display. That at least gave Kylo some satisfaction as he moved to the booth, and decided to slide in first. He tried to ignore Ariel’s too-wide grin, and Gnaeus’s sneaking looks. He tried to ignore the tension of the unspoken questions.

He was going to speak to it, of course, “All right—” and then a waiter had hastened over with the new arrivals to take drink orders.

~***~

A vague later was fine by Mira.

A vague later meant no pressure, although Mira suspected it would be tomorrow, all the same. Tomorrow, they’d address this with level-heads, and put it out in the open why this ended. Why it had to end, no matter what protests they thought of to its continuation. Because, Mira was certain, they wouldn’t get out unscathed by protests and the reality of a certain longing.

Hearing it would make it real and drive the point home.

With a fleeting smile she left him with that ‘later’ promise.

She wasn’t looking forward to it, though, but at least she was not left with those thoughts for long. For better or worse, Julia had been aware enough to grab towels and confront Mira almost immediately on entry into the apartment. She was momentarily startled, deep in those thoughts and not expecting such an abrupt greeting, but she reached for the towel anyways, “Thank you,” was Julia going to annoy her with questions? “My uniform is in a room, isn’t it?” She could just change back into that.

No need to mention the Force, either. She was still in the bubble of the void. “I can change into that.” And wipe off all the running make-up, and feel a bit more like herself. Rather than whatever lie the pretty dress and make-up concocted out on the balcony.

~***~

Brendol Hux hadn’t been forbidden from the party, rather like Carise Sindian and unlike Terex, who still found his way in and somehow kept his head firmly on his shoulders. Terex, who had seen his son being an utter fool again. Not that Brendol retained any hope for him any longer, but it still agitated him to hear how much misplaced faith he’d had in the bastard in the first place.

Better if he never had any children, bastard or otherwise.

That he’d ignore a summons from his father to go and do some fool thing like mess around with his poorly chosen Admiral….

Brendol took a breath, all but ignoring the conversation in his small circle of people criticizing August Tarkin’s recent decisions. Brendol hadn’t taken much time to consider if they were criticizing because they disliked the Order, or because they disliked August, but right then it didn’t matter. He was mostly wasting time.

He was only at this party for one reason.

That reason was finally spotted, dripping wet and looking little more than a drowned rat. Brendol broke from his group, half-empty glass of white wine taken off the counter it’d been resting on, to approach his so-called son. He was starting to have questions on that, too, even if he’d done the DNA test to make sure. “You do enjoy embarrassing yourself at every opportunity, don’t you?” Brendol supposed the question was rhetorical. Of course Hux did. “You’re a mess.”

Which could be an opportunity. He couldn’t very well knock his son out in public the way he’d like, but looking ruinous should make things easier.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin was thrilled when Kylo didn’t drop her hand upon entering the cantina. Even when she, too, found Yoel and his visible distaste. Even when she locked eyes with him for a split second. Even when she slipped in next to Kylo and they were both seconds away from being accosted by Ariel and her already burning questions.

She wasn’t sure if she was relieved by the waiter’s interruption or not. But she did order just a glass of water. She had done all the drinking she’d needed earlier and as much as she’d enjoyed it at the time, she didn’t think it was a good idea. Ariel didn’t agree with that, though, and was quick to add an order of shots as the waiter began to retreat after noting what Kylo wanted. Ariel knew they’d probably end up with her, though.

The redhead stared across for them for a few quiet seconds, before it ate at her. “So?”

“So,” Paquin looked to Kylo for a moment, pulling his hand into her lap under the table. “We talked—“

“About?”

Paquin continued, ignoring the overly-excited noises coming from the other woman. She wasn’t sure why Ariel was so invested, but didn’t question it right then. “—About what we feel for each other,” She could only compare it to whiplash, the understanding of her feelings for him, the joy, and then the hurt. Then back again. “And voiced the concerns on what would come of these things we feel.” What had made him pull away from her at first, and for good reason.

Ariel, of course, wanted more. More details on what they talked about, wanted to hear them say what they felt. But she didn’t risk interjecting.

“I think we came to a decision on how we wanted to go about this,” Paquin faltered then, and stopped. She left it to Kylo. She was sure of what she wanted after their time together, not a questioning thought in her mind. But she gave him one more chance to change his mind and take back what they said, what they’d done. Before it was set in all four of their minds. Before it became real and something with consequences. If it wasn’t already.

-

Julia was not there to annoy her with questions, as intrigued as she was by what words had been exchanged between the two. Because she had been watching. She was entirely too entertained by their relationship, and incredibly curious about how it all came to be. A former Knight turned grey Jedi and the more-than-general Hux. Just another one of Julia’s particular interests.

She wouldn’t annoy her with questions then. But she was nosy.

Mira mentioned something about her uniform, and Julia scrunched her nose at that. She didn’t particularly want Mira to wear it, not there. But she was also not someone who could tell Mira what to do. She would be happy to offer her something of hers, because she definitely could not stay in her drenched dress. But Julia had no intention of forcing anything.

“It’s in a room, sure,” Julia joked, at first, but relented. “Follow me,” she instructed, gesturing her along. She’d had both Hux and Mira’s uniforms placed in one of the spare rooms mostly with the intent to avoid them trying to slip away and change back into them, but that was unavoidable at that point.

The bedrooms had been blocked off for the sake of the party, avoiding intrusion of any personal things. And to discourage any unfortunate behavior under their roof.

A hall was loosely protected by a man and a droid. There wasn’t much concern, but it was better to be safe. Seeing as Julia and her husband owned the place, there was no questioning whether they were allowed to venture deeper into the apartment or not.

Julia picked a door, not at random, “There’s a refresher in here, and your uniform if you so choose.”

-

Hux had hoped to be redressed and a tad bit drunker by the time he stumbled into his father, but of course that wasn’t how it worked out. Hux inhaled deeply, letting out an overt, dramatic sigh as his father criticized him. Of course, Hux expected that much. Did he ever do anything else?

Brendol’s question was rhetoric, but Hux answered anyway. “I do, actually,” it would annoy his father, and at this point his father’s annoyance was the only thing he could enjoy involving his father. “Astute observation, father.” Hux knew the only reason he could get away with such things was because they were in public. If they were in private, the younger Hux knew he’d be slapped. But Brendol very well knew he couldn’t lay his hands on him anywhere else. Hux outranked his father.

Perhaps Hux could have rid himself of his father long ago, but there was still that grating fact that Brendol was the only family he had.

Hux noted the half-empty glass of wine in his father’s hand. Nearly snorted at the fact that it was white. Another opposition between them. Even little things. All they shared was hair color and a name. Other than that, Hux questioned if they really were related. Stars knew Hux wished they weren’t. ‘I suppose that’s a thing we have in common, though.’ Not much else, however.

But, Hux decided he could indulge in another glass of wine to stomach his father’s presence. It was a night of indulgences, after all. So, knowing his father would have no choice but to follow, Hux eased with his empty glass to the makeshift bar for another glass of red. Dripping with water, and yes, perhaps he resembled a rat. But it embarrassed his father more than it did him. The soaking wet suit irritated Hux, but it was worth it to spite his father.

Just once did he understand the thrill of rebellion.

“What was it you so desperately wanted to talk about that you sent Sindian after me?” Hux questioned then, as he leaned against the counter and waited for his drink.

 

[Lucyfer]

Kylo Ren wouldn’t indulge any further in alcohol. He knew, at some point, they were going to have to do a job. He didn’t know precisely how long that would be, but given the turn of circumstances, he didn’t want to learn what the ‘safe’ amount of drinks were. He went with a water as well, while Ariel ordered a bunch of shots.

The waiter went off, and the questioning began again, this time with Paquin offering tactful, vague answers, that were clearly not at all satisfying Ariel’s curiosity. Even if Ariel seemed on the verge of her seat, looking almost hungrily at the pair for more details about what they’d decided to do with their feelings.

The point that Paquin left out, looking to him to fill it in. For a moment, he wondered how – was it possible he might say the wrong thing and upset Paquin? A pressure was there to answer, both Ariel’s curiosity, and in some ways, Paquin’s curiosity, even if they’d figured out quite a bit on the ship.

He took a breath, “We—” the waiter returned with water, and the shots, and this time Kylo scowled a bit as they were set around, words of gratitude – however insincere in the moment – offered to hurriedly dismiss the individual with a penchant for interrupting him. Once he was further away, Kylo looked back to Ariel and Gnaeus, and started again. “We have decided to pursue our feelings for each other.”

He briefly considered clarifications. ‘Until it doesn’t work. Until Snoke ruins it. Until….’ But he didn’t. Besides the obvious, he thought that was how every relationship was. ‘Until’ something ended it, decision or outside force. Until the end of the relationship. No modifier was needed.

He was prepared to cover his ears if Ariel let out some shriek of glee.

At least Gnaeus didn’t seem to be shrieking, though his face lit up, surprise and delight apparent, and Kylo wondered at that, but wouldn’t ask. “Congratulations,” he said, far more mild about all of this than Ariel was.

But at least his smile was warm. Sincere. He was happy for them.

~***~

Mira frowned a moment at Julia’s vague answer, before she offered to lead Mira to where her uniform was. She followed silently, grateful, in some respects, for Julia not saying anything. She had clearly seen. And she might annoy Mira later, but at least right then she was spared some mercy as she was led from the party.

And eventually, out of the bubble of the Void Stone.

The emotions that had been swelling within found release in a moment, the old joy that caused things to bob and float around her as a child, now grasped at the water trapped in her hair and her dress and drew some of it away, letting it dance around for a moment. The kyber shone a brilliant purple. ‘Stop that!’ Mira’s mental tone was immediately harsh.
This was why she couldn’t have nice things, and she forced a deep breath as Julia picked a door.

The water droplets went to the floor as Mira did her best to reign it in, before the reality of that joy hit her and turned it into something not-good. Turned it into all the reasons she wasn’t allowed to feel in the first place. ‘Calm. Calm.’ Except it was far more than calm, it was an apathy she had to master to keep the emotions down below.

“Thank you,” she still smiled to Julia, hoping she hadn’t caught any bit of that, even if the kyber still shone, albeit dimmer, against her.

She wouldn’t stay out for further conversation. She wanted to clean up and put on the uniform as quickly as possible.

~***~

Brendol remained unimpressed with his son’s defiant attitude. He certainly wanted to strike him, or slam him up against the nearest wall so he’d remember himself, but he refrained. It hardly stopped his empty fist from clenching, though, as Hux didn’t even bother to attempt a cursory denial of the embarrassment he’d become, or an apology for not even thinking through his actions. ‘Well he made a cat a commodore, he’s clearly losing his senses.’

They went to the counter, and Brendol wouldn’t protest it.

Hux sat his glass up for a refill, and as the glass was taken, before Brendol answered him, the bartender asked, “What was it you were wanting, General Hux?”

“Oh just get him the damned red toniray and be done with it,” Brendol snapped. The bartender, and his son, were likely not to question it. Well, the bartender might, but he’d had Terex dig into a few things – that Julia had poisoned wine was no surprise. That there were codes for serving it, also, no surprise.

Red toniray was one of those, though not fatal. Just meant for dealing with pests who needed to shut up. Given his son’s mood, he didn’t think he’d call out a change; toniray was a form of wine, after all. Brendol was aware of his son’s preference. A poor choice, really. They were far too sweet.

He got back to the point, though. He hadn’t constructed much of a lie, because he felt much of a lie wasn’t necessary. “It’s about these foolish alliances you’re making on behalf of the Order, without significant input. I’m not wanting to speak with you because I care about you, but I am still a member of the First Order and I do not want to see it fall. There are many of us who think you’re going about things wrong and losing sight of our goals in pursuit of your petty disagreement with Snoke. You’re even willing to hinder our agents and our officers over it, and it’s becoming a growing concern.”

Amongst mostly those old Imperials.

Mostly, those who would be willing to allow a coup.

Those Hux should have been paying attention to.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin knew they’d talked about these things back on the ship, that they’d both decided they wanted to entertain their feelings for each other. Still, she’d given him another out and when he didn’t take it, she couldn’t help the giddy feeling in her stomach or the silly grin her lips formed. Though, the giddiness threatened to turn nauseating at the reminder in the back or her head that there was a good chance she couldn’t keep this. She couldn’t keep him.

It would end.

Her smile faltered at that thought, her ditzy gaze shifting from Kylo to the table in front of her.

But a smile was quick to return to her face when Ariel’s anticipated squeal came, though the redhead had restrained it. Kept it quiet enough for just her table to be irritated by it. “Good!” Her hands clapped together once, before she settled. As much as Ariel could settle. “I’m happy for you two,” if that wasn’t obvious. Of course, maybe she shouldn’t be. They all knew Snoke wouldn’t react positively to this. But perhaps they could have hope

What else did they have?.

Paquin wondered why they were both so invested in how she and Kylo felt about each other, and what they were going to do with those feelings. Ariel more than Gnaeus, but still. It was curious, but the sincerity of it warmed her. “Thank you both,” Paquin didn’t just mean for their congratulations, but for their encouragement. From even when she and Kylo were too blind to see it. “I’m happy too,” it still buzzed in the air around her. Tainted a bit by reality, by fear, but still present.

Ariel lifted a shot glass in a half-toast. “It’s about time somebody here was,” she said before throwing the shot back.

-

Julia hadn’t noticed Mira’s inner turmoil and her attempt to grip at some semblance of control over the Force once they were out of the range of the Void stone. Julia wasn’t very attuned to such things. But, of course she had noticed the purple illuminating from the kyber crystals in Mira’s hair, even though they were dimming by the time Julia had turned back to the woman.

‘Intriguing.’ Julia wondered what the colors Mira’s crystals shone meant, if anything. Was it a fancy party trick or something more? Either way, Julia returned the smile Mira gave her. “Of course. Let me know if you need anything.” She offered as the last bit of conversation before the blonde dipped into the room.

Finn. He’d been wrapped up mostly in spending time with his mother, getting to know her through the things she talked about with people at the party she apparently knew. He’d hardly noticed when Mira and Hux’s disappeared together, until word of it crept back to him. A quick scan over the party made a very wet General Hux apparent. Finn wondered how that happened. He also noticed the equally, if not more irritating Commandant Hux.

But no Mira.

If General Hux’s appearance was anything to go off of, he thought maybe he should check on Mira. With a few questions on where the blonde had last been seen, he’d found himself upon the hallway. Only to be stopped by the man standing guard. “Private quarters are off limits to--”

“He’s fine, thank you,” Julia’s voice came from behind the man, allowing Finn to step by.

“Have you seen Mira? I was pointed back here, I just wanted to check on her.”

-

Hux was almost deafened by his irritation for his own father. He hardly paid attention to whatever it was his father had ordered on his behalf. He’d heard red and thought that was good enough. A mistake on his part, not that he knew that. With a tight jaw and a clenched fist, Hux turned his full attention to his father. He’d almost wanted to tune the man out, but then he began to question his leadership.

“Don’t worry, I’ve never gotten the impression that you care about me. However, I thought you might care about the Order enough to realize the alliances I’m making are not foolish,” Hux hissed, lowly. “You’re description of war against Snoke as a petty disagreement goes to show you have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Oh, how he longed to be back out on the balcony in the rain. With Mira. How at ease he had been with her. ‘It’s dangerous to long for such things.’ It was dangerous to yearn at all and he shook those thoughts from his head.

“I know the goals of the Order,” It was embedded in his entire being, it flowed through his blood. He’d been raised on them. And at the core, he still had those goals. Even if the specifications had shifted. What he suspected, however, was his father’s ideals did not mirror his. “We never would have attained them under Snoke, he’s always wanted something different.” An alliance had been forged then because Snoke offered what the First Order needed to grow.

Snoke wanted only unlimited power at his disposal.

And now Hux was doing it again, creating alliances with who he needed to. “Snoke is a common enemy amongst us all, one no one can defeat on their own.” Not the Resistance, not Tarkin, not the Order. “Once he, Kylo Ren, and all his Knights are eliminated, the game will change. We can discuss your issues then.”

Hux’s glass of wine was placed on the counter before him, and he offered a thanks before taking a long sip. “I’d like to dry myself off now,” Hux stated simply, prepared to leave his father in search for his uniform.

 

[Lucyfer]

There was something peculiar about the way Ariel and Gnaeus encouraged their feelings, even Kylo recognized that as Paquin offered her gratitude to them. Stated that she was happy. Some clarity arrived to that thought with the way Ariel spoke of happiness. ‘You’re not?’ A stupid question, and he knew enough not to ask it.

When were they ever, really, happy?

He had a feeling it was before Kevan’s treachery.

He had a feeling if he asked Gnaeus, the man would say sometime before he took the name Gnaeus, and not really since then. Of course, they gave up the simple pleasures to pursue a greater good, but…Kylo found himself doubting the useful of it, more and more, now. He wanted to be happy.

He wanted them to be happy.

Gnaeus grabbed a shot with his good hand, “To Paquin and Kylo?” He suggested.

Kylo tried not to roll his eyes, failed, and grabbed his glass of water to bring to the center, “To the Knights of Ren.”

~***~

Julia would offer Finn a little nod to his question, “Yes, she’s changing into something drier – turn left at the first opportunity, it’s the third door on the left side,” Julia offered Finn those instructions to finding his master, “You may want to knock first.”

She hardly knew if he had such manners or tact, so she thought it best to mention it.

Stormtroopers never struck her as particularly tactful.



Meanwhile, Mira had at least been sensible enough to lock the door behind herself, and fall back against it, gripping again at her emotions.

Inhale.

Exhale.

But of course on the heels of that joy, came the frustration – the recollection of why, in fact, she could not have nice things, and that had to be contained. Snuffed out, before she broke something in the fancy apartment of the Tarkins, the way she used to break things in her own home.

‘Focus on the water.’

And Mira did, drawing her attention to the water that clung to her flesh, to her hair, to the dress. She drew it off, piece by piece.

She recalled glass with Grakkus.

She recalled sand and stone. Dew. Memories seemed intent to try and flood and distract her, but she could at least say she was good at focusing.

Eventually, she had pulled it all away, and it shimmered like small stars in the air around her, leaving her dry. ‘Now where am I supposed to put it?’ She hadn’t thought that far ahead, but she at least felt calmer. And that thought was making sure her thoughts were going back to Hux.

~***~

The Commandant knew he wouldn’t be happy with anything his son had to say. It hardly stopped him from clenching his jaw tight and being upset. It was foolish to hope, but who could stoop him? Just once, he’d like his son to prove that he was his son, damn it.

But it didn’t matter any longer.

Hux drank the wine without any consideration, and a long draught.

He could let him go change, and hope somehow that he passed out in doing so. He’d be easier to sneak out from a secluded room than from public view. At least, by Terex. Or perhaps Carise. Brendol could make a point to get a small speeder or a ship up to the window…yes, this was sounding like a good plan. “I think looking like a wet rat suits you,” he commented anyways, “but I suppose if you’re trying to keep these wretched allies, it doesn’t do you any good.”

He stepped away, but he’d seek Terex in the crowd when his son was out of sight.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin had joined a terribly unhappy group, hadn’t she? Kylo, Ariel, Gnaeus...not one of them was happy. Hell, even Kevan and Mira must have been unhappy, otherwise they wouldn’t have gone and betrayed everyone. It must have been more appealing than staying where they were.

Ariel’s discontent was easier to guess, her alcoholism a big sign. Gnaeus...he was harder. With the loss of his hand, she thought that made his unhappiness harder to conceal, if he tried at all. Kylo was a can of worms she wasn’t going to begin contemplating. Paquin wondered when the last time any of them felt truly happy.

Paquin was happy. Was she entirely content? No. She couldn’t remember the last time she was. She missed her old job. She was uncertain about her new one. But she loved her people. It was a bad thought, but she didn’t want to be unhappy like them. She didn’t want them to be unhappy like they were. What could she do? Find out what made them feel the way they did? There was probably a lot. And she wasn’t a therapist. Still…

She was pulled from her thoughts by Gnaeus proposing a toast--to her and Kylo. It was a silly thought, the way she appreciated her and Kylo’s names together in the same sentence. And she appreciated Kylo’s correction to the Knights just as much. She lifted her own water, eagerly joining in, “To the Knights of Ren.”

“Finally we get some appreciation,” Ariel teased. She lifted another shot, meeting everyone’s glasses in the middle of the table. “To the Knights of Ren and whatever happens now.” Ariel proceeded to throw the shot back just as fast as she had the first.

-

Finn’s brow furrowed for just a second at Julia’s suggestion. He couldn’t help the expression that formed on his face, one that said ‘yeah, that’s obvious’. It only lasted a fraction of a second before he nodded, “Yeah, I’ll be sure to do that.” Even as a stormtrooper, he knew that. Sure, he hadn’t had much privacy of his own during that time, but he at least knew to knock when someone’s changing.

“Thank you, Mrs. Tarkin.” Was Mrs. Tarkin the right thing to call her? Maybe he should have gone with Julia, but that seemed entirely too informal. Well, it didn't matter anymore.

Julia hummed, “I’m not far, if I’m needed.”

Finn only nodded before he passed her, following her directions to the room. First left, third door on the left side. But thinking, Finn hardly needed directions. He could have just felt Mira. A swirl of emotions and then determination, calm. All behind the door. He almost didn’t want to interrupt, not by knocking, not by entering.

But he did. A soft knock, as not to startle her. “Mira, it’s Finn,” he announced, leaning his side against the door. If she couldn’t gather that herself. “Just wanted to make sure you were okay.” He couldn’t have even tried to feet what she was feeling earlier, the void stone making sure of that.

And Finn wasn’t quite sure what happened, undeniably curious as to what happened and why Hux and Mira came in wet. He was sure everyone who paid attention was. But Finn wasn’t about to ask Hux when Mira was just as easy.

-

Hux’s jaw couldn’t get any tighter than it already was, but every word that came out of his father’s mouth got Hux that much closer to shattering his own jaw. “Remember, there’s only so many sources I get my rat features from.” That was Hux’s goodbye to his father, no further mention of his wretched allies.

He parted from his father. As much as he was pleased his attire displeased his father, it wasn’t entirely comfortable to be stewing in. It was heavy and stuck to his skin, caught every little breeze. Sipping his wine warmed him, as did his reminder to himself of the events on the balcony. But there was only so much they could do to relax him in the moment

His fun was over. He’d dry off and change into his uniform, let Phasma and Mira know he’d probably head back to the Finalizer. Maybe get some work done if he wasn’t too inebriated, and go to bed. Well, that was his plan. And plans didn’t always work out. Especially not when Hux was eagerly chugging a tranquilizer.


And Terex wasn’t hard to find. Of course, he’d been avoiding the Tarkins and getting kicked out before his fun was over. But standing next to Carise in her shiny, ostentatious dress, he was about as hard to miss as she was. The woman was entirely unhappy with Terex’s presence, saying something along the lines of it making them obvious. Which he interrupted at the sight of Brendol, “Oh look, it’s the other boss man.” Terex didn’t like either Hux, really, but he was eager to work with either one. Whichever served Terex’s own agenda well.

“He’s not my boss.” Carise grumbled.

“It is his son we’re trying to kidnap,” Carise gave him a look for that, to tell him to keep quiet. He ignored it. No one was listening to them, not at their volume. “I guess that means Snoke isn’t your boss either?”

Carise was silent for a beat, “We’re all working together.”

“Right. Commandant! How’s the whole son thing going? I’m going to assume Vallens didn’t push him off the balcony and make things easier for you, did she?”

 

[Lucyfer]

Kylo tipped back his own water, as their glasses clinked together, the four of them united for…whatever future awaited them. He set his water aside. There was much to contemplate about that future, certainly. Of course, the immediate concern was the Huxes, who had yet to show up.

He doubted anyone heard anything.

Certainly, not before he would.

Not that he planned to call Snoke to find out what was taking Brendol so long, or why they had to stay there this long. He idly wondered if they should consider getting rooms, but he supposed it hadn’t actually been that long. Yet.

It just felt like it, with his adrenaline having faded some time ago, and now his emotions and mind settling a bit. He was tired. “So…is there a plan?” That was Gnaeus who spoke up. “I mean, for…you two.” For Snoke. For proceeding. How quiet were he and Ariel supposed to keep at this point? “Do you want us to help keep it from Snoke, or…?”

~***~

Mira maintained her calm. She felt Finn’s approach through the Force, and heard his knock. Neither disturbed her, and she focused on a window in the room, pushing it open and then pushing the water droplets outside to rejoin the rain. Out it went, and Mira glanced at her uniform. She didn’t need to put it on right then, but she did.

It would offer something of a disconnect from the previous moment, “I’m all right,” mostly. Not really. “Give me a moment,” she knew Finn wasn’t just there to make sure she was all right.

His curiosity was obvious, buzzing in the air as Mira stripped of the now-dry dress and set it on the bed to change back into her uniform, while the Force pulled her hair down. She’d redo that by hand, at least, an excuse to keep Finn back here if he had questions to ask.

As soon as she was in the uniform, she reached out again with the Force and twisted the knob. She pulled it open just enough so the invitation was obvious as she sought out a mirror to fix her hair, and likely, fix her make-up. She’d held onto Hux long enough that she was sure something smeared, either by that, or by the rain.

~***~

How in the worlds Terex was somehow an actually competent Agent of the First Order, Brendol Hux honestly didn’t know. He was mouthing off about kidnapping General Hux right there, in the middle of Tarkin’s party, while Tarkin wanted to find and kick Terex out. Not that he was doing a good job of it, playing host instead, but still. This wasn’t exactly safe ground to be mouthing off in about the job.

Brendol, as such, glared at Terex for all of it, ignoring Carise’s offense in light of Terex’s idiocy. “No, Vallens did not, I thought you of all people would have noticed that,” he grumbled, “I’m going to get an airspeeder. That fool has gone to change, drinking a tranq all the while. I want you to bring him outside, Terex.”

He decided on Terex then. He had the strength. He also needed to avoid the Tarkins and get out of the party, and he actually seemed to manage that.

Carise, for as light as Hux was, probably wouldn’t manage it, and if she did, she’d break a nail, and Brendol wasn’t prepared to listen to those complaints.

 

[KyloGlenn]

The alcohol that had given Paquin courage earlier began to turn into a dull ache behind her eyes. She didn’t drink much, but she wasn’t much of a drinker to begin with. Paquin wouldn’t have minded calling it a night, going to sleep and dealing with the Brendols later. Ending the day on a somewhat good note. But that wasn’t really an option. They had to wait for the Huxes or word from Snoke. So she sipped her water, hoping it would help the ache in her head.

“Not entirely,” Paquin began. They didn’t really have a plan, but, “I think Kylo and I both agreed trying to hide it from Snoke wouldn’t work well.” Snoke would find out, somehow, and it would likely look worse that they tried to hide it. And if it went as badly as they thought it might, Paquin didn’t want to drag Ariel and Gnaeus down with them for withholding or keeping it from Snoke.

Of course, “We never really talked about telling him, though,” She looked to Kylo, then. He said he’d do what he could about Snoke, but did they want to tell him immediately? Could they avoid it amidst the whole Hux thing? Should they? Simply wait for it to be figured out?

“I don’t know Snoke well.” Did any of them? Well, they at least knew Snoke better than she did. “I don’t know we would get the best response from him,” if there was one at all.

“Maybe when we get Hux would coincide well. If all goes well, having Hux captured would be a great accomplishment for him. Maybe the concept of you two wouldn’t seem so bad if he’s caught in a good mood,” Ariel suggested.

-

Finn wasn’t entirely convinced that she was alright, likely because he couldn’t peace the circumstances together to tell if she was telling the truth. But he didn’t press any further in the moment, giving her the time to get herself together that she asked for, leaning against the wall as he waited.

He waited patiently until he heard the door knob twist and it was pulled open just enough for him. He slipped through, closing the door behind him like it was necessary. It wasn’t, really. No one except the Tarkins and, well, them were apparently allowed in the section of the apartment. But still. Force forbid someone see Mira with her hair down or hear their conversation.

“I’m pretty sure Julia thinks I don’t know what privacy is,” he commented, maybe to get a chuck or a snort, but mainly as to not bombard her with the questions that were burning at him right away.

But, of course, that didn’t last long. He settled himself behind Mira, watching her through the mirror for just a moment. ‘Mira looking in a mirror,’ Finn played with that joke in his head for a moment, but didn’t say it. Instead, he noted the makeup just lightly smeared under her eye and once again that curiosity buzzed. “So...I hate to be that person, especially after having a privacy lesson just now, but...how did it go? With Hux, I mean…”

All Finn knew was that apparently they’d done some dancing but...did it go well? Did it go poorly? Was it actually that deep? Well, Finn knew that between Hux and Mira...of course it was that deep. They were complicated. “And what exactly was it?”

-

Terex wasn’t stupid. He knew his crowd. Or rather, Tarkin’s crowd. They, at that point, were all too drunk, syphoning the Tarkin’s wine. Or too absorbed in themselves. And well, Terex was good at avoiding the Tarkins and whoever they sent after him. Not to mention secrecy wouldn’t matter soon enough.

Once Hux was figured to be missing and Brendol and Carise suddenly having the sway they wanted, well...would it really be any secret? And Terex was sure he wouldn’t be excluded from that.

“Hm. What did your son ever do for you to jump at the chance to betray him so? Actually, don’t answer that.” Terex dismissed. “Where’d junior go?”

Brendol gestured off into the direction his son had headed in, and Terex caught a glimpse of red hair, darkened and messed by water before it retreated. There were a limited amount of gingers here, so he’d assume it was the one he was after. “I better take that, then. I’ll shoot you a com when I’ve got him nailed down.” Terex said before pushing past him.

“What about me?” Carise asked.

“Just stay occupied, don’t look suspicious,” Brendol sighed. But he knew she wouldn’t be satisfied by that, would know he was trying to keep her out of the way. “If anyway seems to catch on, distract them.” If Terex did his job right, that wouldn’t be necessary.

 

[Lucyfer]

Ariel’s suggestion didn’t seem to phase Kylo, though Gnaeus’s eyes lit up as it was said. “That’s right, I remember that—” and he clamped down.

He could still hear echoes of Kevan’s laughter in his head, as Kevan spoke to him of how to ‘work with’ Snoke. Really, it was a list of loopholes and exploits that absolutely included the promiscuity Ariel was known for, and Kevan didn’t shirk. He’d been a dramatic mess of a man, that was certain.

But Gnaeus didn’t want to say ‘I remember that Kevan used that’ and follow with the example that had crossed his mind, because no one at the table was really meant to like Kevan, or think well of him.

“Remember what?” Kylo spoke into his hesitating silence.

He flushed as he lowered his gaze, “It was a tactic Kevan used to use,” he said, “I’m sure he never really asked anything large to begin with, but….” Well, wasn’t there a lot of ignorance surrounding Kevan and what he’d truly been up to? He had gotten away with much, after all. Had avoided Snoke looking too deeply. “It may at least…benefit you two, to be up front. Then Snoke won’t be looking for anything just by you two acting differently. Speaking when we have Hux, or thereafter, may…actually work.”

He could see how Kylo’s expression shifted at the mention of Kevan, but he didn’t interrupt. Gnaeus had a point. Ariel had a point. They weren’t likely to catch Snoke in a good mood too often, and dishonesty would be worse. “The worst he can do is tell you not to continue it, right?”

“No,” Kylo didn’t mean to say it, and yet he did. No, it wasn’t the worst Snoke could do, but…he sighed. Relented for their hopes, and his own, “but it’s likely as far as he’d go if he disapproves.”

~***~

Finn entered the room as soon as the invite registered, and shut the door right after. Mira did allow a chuckle to escape as Finn commented on Julia’s opinions, “Well, I think you understand privacy,” she allowed, fingers pulling through her hair to weave a more relaxed braid into her hair. Well, as relaxed as a fishtail braid could be, anyways.

It didn’t take long for him to settle.

Nor for him to ask about the situation with Hux. Finn may understand privacy, but not subtlety. Mira had anticipated that, though. They’d made a scene, and now it would be the talk of the party, although she had little intention of sharing it with just anyone.

Finn was that exception.

“It went terribly.” Not the answer a normal person would give, but she wasn’t a normal person and that was precisely the problem, wasn’t it? She wouldn’t have had these issues if she was normal. She didn’t leave it at that. It would be doing a disservice to her padawan to leave it at that. “We share a mutual interest in each other, which I’m sure sounds like a good thing, but I was hoping it was one-sided foolishness on my part.”

A deep breath helped seal the focus as the braid was finished, left to fall down her back, the smaller one woven in, decorating it with the kyber she kept in. She looked around the room for a cloth or something to wipe the make-up off with. “Now I have to contend with his wants as well as my own and that’s rather more difficult.” Denying herself was easy. Denying Hux?

Not so much. She already knew that. For him to want more from her, no matter how much they both may try to ignore it, or go about their normal lives, was…different. And they’d talk and try to sort it out, of course, but…. “I suppose I still have to try to ignore it, all the same.”

So long as it didn’t hurt him too deeply, she’d prefer to remain near.

A soothing orange glow highlighted the braid, turning the strands a deeper gold, but Mira didn’t notice the way her old apprentice tried to be present.

~***~

The pout Carise wore might have been flattering on a younger woman, but Brendol was hardly moved by the expression that crossed her face, which seemed to sour further as he took a step back, “If you’ll excuse me.” Getting the speeder wouldn’t be terribly difficult. Getting it to these heights relatively unnoticed would be, but as Terex knew, the secrecy only had to last so long.

As soon as his son was delivered, there was no more need of it. The Order would be properly aligned again, and the Knights would take care of their own in good time. Mira’s affections for his son would likely be her own undoing. “Make use of a light to signal when you have him, Terex.”

That way, Brendol would only need to go up to the balcony or window where Terex was, and not circle the top level for a while, aimlessly.

He wouldn’t wait long for his directions to be understood. He was the ‘boss man’, however grating a term that was, and he knew they’d fall in line to better serve Snoke.

He made his way from the group, and out of the party. He wasn’t stopped, though he was required to toss a few acknowledging farewells to those that noticed him…and to endure a few frustrating titters behind his back, and some comment of him being too heavy to be a lightweight.

He fumed, but pretended he didn’t hear it, for the time being.

Soon enough they’d all suffer for picking the wrong side. August Tarkin should have known better, a long time ago.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Paquin shifted at the mention of Kevan, though likely not for the same reasons as Kylo. It was...an awkward subject. For everyone. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if they all talked about it at some point, but Paquin wasn’t about to suggest that. Her bad ideas for the day peaked at suggesting she and Kylo try their hand at a relationship, she’d maxed that out.

However, Ariel and Gnaeus hadn’t reached that point yet. And they offered probably the only good idea for their situation, courtesy of Kevan. Paquin did cringe the slightest bit at the concept of what the worse Snoke would do. They knew Snoke could do much worse but Kylo didn’t have to say it.

“Well, there’s only one way to find out. You’ve only got one shot with Snoke finding out,” Ariel pointed out. And it might as well be the way Kylo and Paquin would be the least fucked. When were they going to have something like Hux being captured again? “And Kevan had to be onto something, considering…” Ariel trailed off. Considering he managed to amass a following and betray them all without Snoke ever suspecting it. But that might’ve just been a Kevan thing.

Paquin focused on the condensation dripping down her glass of water, her thumb wiping away at it as if it would ease the anxious knot in her stomach. “I suppose it is the only good option.” She felt like a kid, like she was asking her parents for something they were guaranteed to say no to. Only her parents wouldn’t kill her for asking.

“That or try to pass it as something purely physical,” Ariel got away with it. Kevan did. But Ariel genuinely didn’t feel any emotional attachment for the people she slept with, and Snoke knew he could always use her in that way. And she wasn’t Kylo. “But…” Ariel eyed the two of them. Even if she were Snoke or wasn’t Force-sensitive, she wouldn’t believe there was nothing emotional between the two of them. "It'll be fine."

-

To say Finn didn’t understand would be an understatement. Well, he did understand, in a way. She was probably trained to think that way. To think that attachments or feelings were bad. By Snoke, by Luke. By herself. Finn was too, for different reasons, maybe. His was more so he could move on quickly when he lost his comrades. Efficiency over emotions, because as far as anyone was concerned, Stormtroopers weren’t people.

That hadn’t worked out. In his case, anyway.

But long story short, he could understand where this could have been a learned response. But now? As much as Finn didn’t like Hux, Mira did. And what was stopping their ‘mutual interest’ in each other?

“You’re right, it does sound like a good thing.” Finn sought out a place to sit, briefly adjusting his clothes so he could sit comfortably. Leaning forward, he rested his elbows on his legs. He watched her weave her hair into braids, watched the kyber crystals flow an orange hue. He didn’t recall seeing that color before, but he didn’t comment on it right then.

“I mean, I think anyone could have told you that there was a mutual interest.” There were rumors about it. Well, there were rumors about Mira with everyone, somehow. Mira with August, Hux, Phasma, Kylo. Hell, he was sure someone in the Resistance suspected something between Mira and Snoke. But with Hux, well. There was something noticeable in the way they interacted with each other. If not odd for Mira, it was odd for Hux.

“But, I don’t think I’m quite following. Why do you have to ignore it?” Finn could think of a few reasons she would come up with, but he wanted to hear the reasoning come from her, from her own words. He wasn’t going to try to tell her what to do, or convince her of anything.

Maybe if she heard her own reasoning out loud, she’d make better sense of it. Or maybe Finn would understand her side. What was it that made her--either of them--stop? Fear?

-

Terex abandoned Carise without so much as a goodbye when Brendol parted. Mostly because he found the obvious displeasure amusing. But also because he didn’t want to lose sight of Hux and have to go around, peeking through the Tarkin’s various doors. Now that would certainly earn him unwanted attention. First, he needed to get Hux delivered. Then all the attention could come flooding in, if that’s what was going to happen.

Terex weaved through the party goers, trying to keep his eye on the young Hux as he retreated down a hall. Absent-mindedly, Terex tried to follow him down the hall, only to be stopped by a man manning the hall. ‘Crap,’ this was fine. Only a minor hiccup. “Hey, I gotta follow him. He’s my boss. I’m his guard for tonight,” the lie came easily.

The actual guard looked between the two of them, a gesture. He was a guard, was that not enough? No, Terex would answer, “If you were him, would you trust someone else’s guards?” He asked. A moment of pondering.

“Tell him he’s got ten minutes back there,” The guard allowed, but only a small amount of time. He had to have some control over the situation.

Terex grinned, clapping him on the shoulder as he passed, “That’s all I need,” hopefully.

Terex followed the sound of a door closing, watching shadows pass under the door. He didn’t burst in, of course. He couldn’t, lest he wanted to risk a commotion. And so he posted himself outside the door, as if he were standing guard. Waiting...waiting...waiting...until he heard something hit the ground. “Please don’t be naked,” Terex grumbled as he pushed the door open. To his delight, Hux wasn’t. Half undressed, but still covered.

Terex hovered over Hux, lightly tapping his face to see if he was out. The ginger stirred, still awake. Eyes squinting, but too out of it to do anything. “Your girlfriend is gonna kill me for this, I’m sure.” Terex drug the ginger to the nearest window, accidentally dragging along some of the wine that spilled when Hux fell. Propping Hux against the wall, Terex tasked himself with finding a light to signal with. “Voids...y’know, I can’t wait until I can be my own boss again,” Terex rambled to the barely conscious general as they waited.

 

[Lucyfer]

Ariel had a point.

There was no do-over with introducing Snoke to the idea of Kylo and Paquin. Kylo could at least appreciate that stark reality, even it came from the resident drunk. Especially given all that Kevan got away with.

Kevan played his game well. Better than any of them. He still died, but he had done well with manipulating Snoke, pulling the wool over his eyes.

Kylo wasn’t trying to do that. He knew where that would lead – he was trying to have the relationship, trying to learn what a relationship could be. His gaze narrowed as Ariel suggested he try to pass this off as purely physical. Certainly, there was a physical aspect – but it hardly went so far as Ariel’s ventures. Yet.

He knew that would come far too slowly for anyone to believe this was only physical.

Snoke would never buy it.

He let out a sigh as Ariel concluded, “You are at least right. We have one shot. I…suppose I will take to consideration the advice and use it.”

“Do you want any help?” Gnaeus asked.

“Do you actually think you can help?” Kylo countered.

Gnaeus considered, shrugged, “Snoke knows why I’m here.” Perhaps he’d be concerned denial would turn Kylo away, as it would have done with Gnaeus if Snoke were the one to ruin his relationship. “Though I suppose that might seem more a threat…and we don’t want to do that. So no, probably not.”

Kylo was on his own.

~***~

Mira felt a small smile tug at her lips as Finn expressed that the interest had been obvious. It had been, in too many respects. Mira had been dreading this moment, after all. She had hoped they would both…keep it to themselves.

She found a bit of tissue paper and went back to the vanity, the mirror, as Finn was confused about why. “For you, the Force is easy. You have to…well, force it to respond to you.” Mira retained that small smile as she said that. “It isn’t that way for me. I have to force it not to respond to me.”

She dabbed at the make-up, and focused on that. “When I was young, the Force responded to my every emotion. If I was happy, things bobbed in the air around me, the wind twirled, the world was abundant with energy and life – but how frustrating for anyone who wanted a spoonful of sugar to watch it all leave their spoon.”

How terrible a child she’d been.

“And when I was angry, things would explode. Doors would splinter. Pipes would burst. If I was afraid, the Force pushed everything that was near me, away.” No comforting embrace allowed in fear, just fear. “When I was sad, it was a crushing weight, and to this day, I’ve never learned how to express emotion to any normal degree without…that ruining it.” A gesture of the hand with the tissue paper, before she floated it to a trash receptacle.

“I don’t want to know what liking him too much will do to me, or to him. I don’t want to know what love could do, and how could I be in a relationship if I couldn’t express it…?” What kind of relationship was that? What kind of relationship to be trapped inside her own body?

“When Kevan died, I destroyed an entire store,” she confessed. “Shattered glass, overturned mannequins, injured people…it’s a terrible thing to be attached, for me.” She knew it was not so with others. She’d never tell Finn to avoid it. “It is the same with Kylo, but he is more capable of controlling it. He tried to teach me. Luke tried. Snoke tried.”

All, for naught.

~***~

Getting the speeder had indeed been easy, and soon enough, Brendol was trying to remember how to drive one. It had been…a long time. It wasn’t as easy as remembering how to drive a starship, at all, and he loathed the stops and starts and drops that occurred as he tried to wrap his head around the vehicle and the streets of Coruscant.

Eventually, he figured it out again – at least well enough.

If it was a bit jerky, oh well.

Soon enough, he rose high enough, and was thankfully just in time to see the lights that Terex flashed. At least he was competent enough to handle this task.

Brendol brought the craft up to the same level. There wasn’t a balcony, but there was a window, and he drew the vehicle as close to it as he could, looking in to see Terex with Hux. He made an impatient gesture for him, anxiously looking towards other windows and balconies to make sure no one was about to notice what was going on.

He had some small trill of joy to see his son’s eyes opened.

He was awake, for now – but unable to do anything.

At least he’d know, now, that he’d fucked up for the last time. And he’d know who was responsible for fixing the Order. They shouldn’t have passed him up for General in the past. Snoke knew that, now.

 

[KyloGlenn]

Ariel was a drunk, not stupid. Well, maybe that was debatable at times. But generally, she had her moments where she was right. “Maybe if phrased right, it might be an appealing concept,” as it was, it could sound like a threat. But Gnaeus had a strong relationship, and it was clearly something influential. She knew Kylo didn’t want his and Paquin’s potential relationship to be something for Snoke to use, but it could be their best chance. And they didn’t have to let Snoke use it.

But she didn’t suggest that.

Paquin felt she was missing some details, as far as Gnaeus went. Her eyes moved between Kylo and Gnaeus. Curious she was, but she didn’t ask. Not then, at least. She hoped there’d be a chance to later. Paquin took a deep breath, relaxing her posture as she exhaled, leaning back into her seat. “I appreciate your guys’ willingness to help,” Paquin offered. She was sure Kylo did, too. But in the end, it seemed they were on their own.

Well, mainly Kylo. There was hardly anything Paquin could do to help with Snoke, she was too new. She could only be there and hope for the best, though she didn’t suppose there was much going for them. And it was abundantly clear that neither Ariel nor Gnaeus could help during the fact.

Still, she wanted to hope that there was a chance for them. She wanted it badly. Maybe that made her stupid.

Her hand sought him out, “We’ll know what to do when we get there,” Paquin encouraged. There was only so much pre-planning they could do before it circled back around to how screwed they may or may not be. She almost wanted to apologize for putting him in this position, but at the same time she wasn’t sorry at all for kissing him or feeling for him.

-

Finn was always an intent listener, and it was no different now. Watched her as she dabbed at the makeup that had been messed up like it was his job, watched as the tissue floated to the trash. And he frowned. He didn’t mean to, but he did. Because, well, “That doesn’t sound fair,” that was the first thought to come out of him. Because...it wasn’t? Wasn’t the Force all about balance or something? Because that didn’t sound like balance to him.

He hadn’t realized that was how Mira lived with the Force. He knew there were some difficulties, of course. With Snoke, with the Force in general but...he didn’t realize how active it was.

“That’s not...how people are supposed to live…” People couldn’t not feel. That much seemed clear at that point. Stormtroopers weren’t supposed to feel, weren’t supposed to get attached. Hell, the Jedi weren’t supposed to, from what Finn knew of the Jedi Order before all this.

It all had to come out eventually. “I’m sorry,” he didn’t mean to seem like he pitied her. Even if, technically, he was sympathetic. He also didn’t want her to feel less than for being the way she was. “I didn’t mean it like that, I’m just…” concerned, he supposed. How had she lived like this for all these years? How could someone not have found a way to teach her or help her?

Finn didn’t know how to help. He was the padawan, he didn’t know the Force. But he wanted to. Maybe Mace knew something…. He thought about asking Rey, but she learned from Luke. And Luke hadn’t helped her…

“I understand where you’re coming from now,” he assured her. He wasn’t going to tell her to do anything. He wasn’t going to mention how he thought it was a little too late to not be attached. “Nothing has to come of you and Hux,” Finn silently wouldn’t mind if nothing did, but that was besides the point. “But I don’t think this has to be your fate.” He wouldn’t mention his own interest in investigating, either.

-

Terex couldn’t help but roll his eyes at Brendol’s impatient gesture, hauling Hux through the window and into Brendol’s waiting speeder. Not looking down, because he didn’t want to see how far he could fall if Brendol pulled away. Or how far he could drop Hux.

Terex shoved Hux aside, settling into the speeder next to the barely conscious man. “You know, he’s a lot heavier than he looks.” He complained. Hux was a slight man, definitely less than half of his father’s weight. But still, the dead weight wasn’t easy to move. He’d want to see Brendol try.

Didn’t matter now. The hard part was mostly over. Terex shifted Hux so it at least looked like he was sitting up, a willing participant. Not that anyone would really look twice on Coruscant. Terex noted how Hux’s eyes were still open, squinting in the direction of his father. There must have been some sort of recognition there, not that Hux could do anything.

He must have been trying to fight the tranq, but he would obviously fail. “I’ll tell Snoke we’ve got him,” Terex declared, not nearly as worried about getting caught as Brendol was. He pulled his sleeve back, accessing the comlink Snoke had provided him with for this situation.

A message was recorded, mentioning they had Hux and were ready for the details of where to deliver him.