MAGMA KRAKEN!

H

Heaven's Thunder Hammer

Member
How many people have made a PC that based their fighting style around MAGMA KRAKEN?


If you haven't remember:


MAGMA KRAKEN! Can be used for anything


1.) Cat stuck in tree?


MAGMA KRAKEN!


Kitty died? Cast MAGMA KRAKEN! again. It'll do something. Somehow.


2.) Fighting bad guys?


ALWAYS! MAGMA KRAKEN!!


3.) Having a bad day?


MAGMA KRAKEN! will definitely cheer you up!
 
This sounds a lot like me playing a game of Scribblenauts.


Need to win a bike race to get a starry? MAGMA KRAKEN


I think it's like that old saying "if all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail".
 
Any spell that lets you take Control Tentacle actions is okay in my book.


Also, note that it's not just a combat spell, it has multiple hidden benefits. Most importantly, when it ends, the tentacles harden into statues. Need to redecorate your garden? MAGMA KRAKEN!


...Which are made of obsidian, a mineral famed for its potential sharpness. Need material to make a new scalpel? MAGMA KRAKEN!


They also generate a searing heat, which is neat. Need a campfire? MAGMA KRAKEN!


Finally, they have Strength 10 and Dexterity 4, making them useful as servants and aides. Need a napkin? MAGMA KRAKEN!
 
I make zero claim to be humorous, but I'll give it a go.


Bad day in the Bureau? MAGMA KRAKEN!


Need help restraining your Lunar spouse after that talk about 'wearing the Behemoth Shape in bed' went wrong? MAGMA KRAKEN!


Can't communicate with those Autochthonian invaders? MAGMA KRAKEN!
 
Heck, because you can set it to a reasonable distance, MAGMA KRAKEN! can even be used to make julienne fries!
 
Need to find that copy of the Broken Winged Crane before the library staff find you rumaging through their shelves? MAGMA KRAKEN!


Need to destroy said book? MAMGA KRAKEN is way ahead of you!
 
Those cruel Guildsmen wanting to chop down those trees without the proper prayers or ceremony? CAPTAIN PLAN--er, MAGMA KRAKEN!
 
Your mother in law is ringing at the door to spend the evening with you ? greet her with a nice and warm MAGMA KRAKEN!


People honking like crazies while stuck in traffic ? MAGMA KRAKEN!


A deathlord has captured you and brought you to his fortress where he proposes you a sweet deal for your soul and eternal servitude ? decline politely with a MAGMA KRAKEN!
 
I got tired of doing my job, so I cast MAGMA KRAKEN!!!!!


Then my building was on fire fromt he lava tenticles and falling apart. SO I cast MAGMA KRAKEN!! again, to ride like a surfer to my safety.


But then that was boring, because the fire department came and started putting out my fire. So I cast MAGMA KRAKEN! on those silly fire fighters. Then I felt better.
 
Family reunion getting a bit dull? Magma Kraken!


People keep trying to show you up at the High School Reunion? Introduce yourself with a nice Magma Kraken!!!


Someone using Mind Rendingly Horrendous Cosplay? Counter with Magma Kraken!!!


Someone dropped your darling Damsel off the side of a skyscraper? This looks like a job for MAGMA KRAKEN!!!
 
Andoriol said:
Someone dropped your darling Damsel off the side of a skyscraper? This looks like a job for MAGMA KRAKEN!!!
Click to expand...
Surgeon General's Warning: Magma Kraken may include such side effects as scorched and/or ravished damsels, obsidian tentacle statues, tentacle rape, brain damage and or death. Please consult your doctor on whether Magma Kraken is right for you and your damsel.
 
Government forcing you to include boring legal disclaimers on your Celestial Circle spells? Always remember; the tree of liberty is watered with the firey blood of MAGMA KRAKEN!
 
Your high school arch enemy is bullying you once again ? tell him "look behind you !!! MAGMA KRAKEN!"


Your dog ate another of your left shoes ? discipline him with a MAGMA KRAKEN!


There's just too many people on this damn bus ? breath some fresh air and clear the space with a MAGMA KRAKEN!


Your girlfriend asks you for help cooking a dinner for her friends coming over tonight ? MAGMA KRAKEN! for a well ooked meal and an exquisite evening decoration !
 
Someone crying in despair? Cheer them up with a MAGMA KRAKEN!


Can't find you keys? MAGMA KRAKEN!


Writers' Block? Spark some creativity with a MAGMA KRAKEN!
 
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