Other How do you feel about Koreaboos/Weeaboos & Asian fetishism?

[Soulless]

Mostly, in the Anime and Kpop community, I feel like there is a number of people that have a false perception of how Asian people are. I feel like a lot a people place Asian people on a pedestal or something when it comes to how they look or other shallow reasons.

Why do non-asian people want to be Asian?
Why do people want to be friends with me/and or other Asian people just for the aesthetics?
How would you deal with people that make you feel objectified?
How do I educate people about the diversity of Asian cultures? ((without having an underlying hint of passive aggression haha))
Have you had any experiences with Asian fetishism?

I'd love to have a discussion with a lot of people!

 

[rae2nerdy]

I think if I were to take a wild stab in the dark it would be that people think Anime is a realistic portrayal of Asian culture.

So they basically expect real life Asian people to be like having a friend/significant other who is an Anime character.

I have no idea what a KPop is so can’t help you there.

I find the thing that helped me when doing roleplays and definitely with talking to shallower fans was doing actual research on Japan.

I have an entire document about Japanese culture and schools I made for a magical girl roleplay that took me probably a month to write.

I researched as many Japanese travel sites as I could find, I asked my mom who lived in Japan as a kid for a year, and I asked people who had been to Japan/where Japanese for help.

Now is it the most in-depth document on Japanese life ever written? No it was designed for a pretty silly campy roleplay.

But I had fun learning more in depth stuff about Japanese culture and I use it as a jumping off point whenever I want to do a roleplay in Japan.

If nothing else it shows my partners I’m not just going to half ass something.

So I think the best way to tackle this is possibly to sort of take a round about approach. Ask them what they like about Asian culture. Like do they like the fashion or the holidays or the differences in the schools?

Like ask them specific questions and if they don’t know the answer sort of be like

Oh well it’s really interesting because in X place they do things Y way.

Or if your American I dunno maybe just tell them you think it’s rude that they are friends with you because your ethnicity.

 

[Error 420]

well in the past 100 years east asia went from being completely unknown by americans to being equals economically, technologically, and culturally. so it's new, it's relatively (not actually at all but nobody actually looks very far into it) untouched by white western culture and so to many people it seems apposed to white western culture. a lot of people who don't align themselves with the culture around them in america tie themselves to what makes them different. for many, this is ethnic traditions, this is things that belong to their group specifically. but then what if people don't align themselves with those big groups either??????

then they naturally go to whatever they think is the polar opposite of whatever the biggest things are, even if they really aren't. on a surface glance, american culture values power, mostly through sex and capitalism. the media that reaches american shores from the east on a surface glance values happiness, friendship, adventure, something that many people who feel isolated in white america value above power.

and of course, these different cultures do have different primary values, but people who raise one culture up on a pedestal and spit on others are only taking surface glances. every culture is made up of several different diverse values and ideals that make up a whole, and many aren't as obvious.

 

[Abendrot]

With these sorts of things, I feel that working to diversify people's knowledge of things helps to lessen the fetishizing, and develop a healthier appreciation that doesn't stereotype as much. If you have a friend who is really into the K-Pop scene, maybe try and get them more familiarized with other aspects of Korean culture.

It is nice to see a shift in the American perception of who Asians are, considering the appeal many of these idols have. It's not wholly well-rounded, but it seems like it's becoming more multi-faceted, at least moreso than in the past. We've been gaining a foothold in global media representation in recent years, and I feel like K-Pop is putting Asian culture in a better light than before.

 

[TanteRegenbogen]

I aint a weeaboo but I love going to Japan to hang out with my Japanese and Australian expat friends. I like the food and I like karaoke.

 

[WolfSol]

A lot of people are simply ignorant. Any culture that is not of their own must appear fascinating and different to those who are not accustomed to it on a daily basis. Most people jump to conclusions and bandwagons though and rely on what media tends to show, hence the ignorance. I'm sorry that you have to deal with this. I would simply educate the hell out of 'em, ask for forgiveness and toss out apologies afterward.

 

[Soulless]

I think if I were to take a wild stab in the dark it would be that people think Anime is a realistic portrayal of Asian culture.

So they basically expect real life Asian people to be like having a friend/significant other who is an Anime character.

I have no idea what a KPop is so can’t help you there.

I find the thing that helped me when doing roleplays and definitely with talking to shallower fans was doing actual research on Japan.

I have an entire document about Japanese culture and schools I made for a magical girl roleplay that took me probably a month to write.

I researched as many Japanese travel sites as I could find, I asked my mom who lived in Japan as a kid for a year, and I asked people who had been to Japan/where Japanese for help.

Now is it the most in-depth document on Japanese life ever written? No it was designed for a pretty silly campy roleplay.

But I had fun learning more in depth stuff about Japanese culture and I use it as a jumping off point whenever I want to do a roleplay in Japan.

If nothing else it shows my partners I’m not just going to half ass something.

So I think the best way to tackle this is possibly to sort of take a round about approach. Ask them what they like about Asian culture. Like do they like the fashion or the holidays or the differences in the schools?

Like ask them specific questions and if they don’t know the answer sort of be like

Oh well it’s really interesting because in X place they do things Y way.

Or if your American I dunno maybe just tell them you think it’s rude that they are friends with you because your ethnicity.

Thank you for your input and I'm glad you had fun learning about Japanese culture! Genuinely engaging yourself with other cultures is a truly beautiful thing. Sometimes I feel like I have too much fun researching when it comes to running role-plays revolving around a certain culture haha

 

[Soulless]

well in the past 100 years east asia went from being completely unknown by americans to being equals economically, technologically, and culturally. so it's new, it's relatively (not actually at all but nobody actually looks very far into it) untouched by white western culture and so to many people it seems apposed to white western culture. a lot of people who don't align themselves with the culture around them in america tie themselves to what makes them different. for many, this is ethnic traditions, this is things that belong to their group specifically. but then what if people don't align themselves with those big groups either??????

then they naturally go to whatever they think is the polar opposite of whatever the biggest things are, even if they really aren't. on a surface glance, american culture values power, mostly through sex and capitalism. the media that reaches american shores from the east on a surface glance values happiness, friendship, adventure, something that many people who feel isolated in white america value above power.

and of course, these different cultures do have different primary values, but people who raise one culture up on a pedestal and spit on others are only taking surface glances. every culture is made up of several different diverse values and ideals that make up a whole, and many aren't as obvious.

Interesting views... Also, the point about the media displaying content at a surface glance is a really compelling topic. Something I wonder is why are people attracted to looking like the people of another culture to the point that they try to mimic the people of that culture as well. Maybe it's out of fascination? Ignorance? Personal fulfillment? I'm not sure. In general, I think it's striking how some people wish they were born another ethnicity just for aesthetic reasons or for that "certain look".

 

[Soulless]

A lot of people are simply ignorant. Any culture that is not of their own must appear fascinating and different to those who are not accustomed to it on a daily basis. Most people jump to conclusions and bandwagons though and rely on what media tends to show, hence the ignorance. I'm sorry that you have to deal with this. I would simply educate the hell out of 'em, ask for forgiveness and toss out apologies afterward.

In time my fello rper, I shall embark on a journey to educate those that fail to embody or falsely represent a culture. And thanks for your sympathy, I've erased a lot of people from my life that have brought nothing but uncomfortableness and anxiety. Even though I'm more alone, strangely, I feel less lonely. I feel like I'm able to dedicate my time to people that actually see me for me and not just how I look or for the sole purpose of being an "asian friend"

 

[Sylvio]

I mean I'm half Asian, but I feel more culturally Asian and look more Asian so I wouldn't say I want to be like a Triangle Asian. I want more Asian friends cause I just don't have that many and feel I would have an easier time hanging out around those who are similar to me culturally and racially. Plus I don't follow Asian media because I wanna blend in but I just genuinely enjoy it. (Fuck anime tho lmao)

Sometimes I feel like Asians are just seen as sex objects to some people and I felt that when I dated this non-Asian guy, I felt like I was just something to be shown off and used for pleasure and it wasn't healthy for me. I was just too emotionally unstable to confront him about it so I just left him, I really haven't objectified since then so I really don't know how to help you there.

Now if you wanna really educate someone on Asian culture, I just feel like you can't force it because it's just gonna go through one ear and out the other. If you see someone who is interested and respects Asian culture then help them out in understanding it better.

 

[Soulless]

I mean I'm half Asian, but I feel more culturally Asian and look more Asian so I wouldn't say I want to be like a Triangle Asian. I want more Asian friends cause I just don't have that many and feel I would have an easier time hanging out around those who are similar to me culturally and racially. Plus I don't follow Asian media because I wanna blend in but I just genuinely enjoy it. (Fuck anime tho lmao)

Sometimes I feel like Asians are just seen as sex objects to some people and I felt that when I dated this non-Asian guy, I felt like I was just something to be shown off and used for pleasure and it wasn't healthy for me. I was just too emotionally unstable to confront him about it so I just left him, I really haven't objectified since then so I really don't know how to help you there.

Now if you wanna really educate someone on Asian culture, I just feel like you can't force it because it's just gonna go through one ear and out the other. If you see someone who is interested and respects Asian culture then help them out in understanding it better.

I totally relate with you when it comes to wanting to surround yourself with people that are similar to you culturally and racially because it's easier. Sometimes I feel like when I hang out with other Asians there's a mutual respect or something we just understand for each other. Psychologically I can understand it because we are naturally social creatures that yearn to be respected and accepted by others, and perhaps the easiest way for us to feel that from others is by staying with those that may seem similar to us, culture and looks-wise.

I'm sorry that relationship made you feel that way. ( I wish I could kick that dude's butt )

I'm happy you got out of that situation. Know that I feel truly proud and appreciative that you've shared this and am thankful for your advice!

 

[Sylvio]

Thanks hun

i'm glad you posted this thread. We gotta look out for each other, whitewashed or homegrown uwu

 

[weldherwings]

I was born in Ireland and have lived in Australia my whole life, but I’ve always been inspired by Asian culture. My parents have always told me that from a young age I showed so much interest in the culture and was always upset that I could never find any Asian friends.

What captivated me the most about the culture is the amount of respect they have one and another. Especially in the Korean culture, age respect is a big thing. They also believe that a child is everyone’s responsibility and not just the parents which I think is amazing.

I find that most Korean people I meet, I don’t let them know that I know that much about the culture or entertainment. They’ll mention something and go to explain it and I’ll tell them I already understand because it links to this and that, and they are generally so excited when you tell them. At all the KBBQ places I’ve been to, the waiters tend to recognise my husband and I after our second visit because we like to chat with the waiters and practice our Hangul. When we were in Korea, we were approached by so many locals asking if we needed help when we looked a bit lost. When we would say things in Hangul, they’d get really excited for us. They’re absolutely lovely!

 

[Winter_Wolf]

Weird. Annoying. In 3/4 of my college years one of my acquaintances/roommates (white male) was an avid anime fan and at times having to overhear the anime voices and anime music drove me insane. The voices just sounded like over dramatized extremes a lot of the time; repeated, deranged male screeching/yelling, or coy female. That's what sticks in my mind the most, although I guess there was some variation (I feel like I also remember deep rapey male voice talking to delicate/coy female voice). One of my worst memories wasn't from an anime per se but for several days it felt like he was blasting the volume on some sort of anime/manga/whatever xbox game that sounded and looked quite repetitive and annoying.

Feels like Samurai, Katanas, etc are idolized by some, too come to think of it. I've had more exposure to those things from historical perspective, not through games/movies/shows, which might play them up for the sake of spectacle and sensation. So from my perspective they're more "interesting" than things to whip it out for...

 

[Nobelia]

To me, koreabooism and weeaboism is in short, a sum of stereotypes + ignorance + romanticism. It's almost like some twisted and beautified form of racism, except without the hatred part, and so it can't quite fall under racism. This culture-booism can apply to any culture or racial construct in the world, imo.

Just look at how globalized the whole African-American "ghetto baddie (idk it's specific term) aesthetic" became -- nowadays, everyone and their mother wants to wear hoops, listen to rap, wear braids, bleed liquid gold, and don heavy makeup. Not speaking down nor glorifying these aspects, simply stating traits which was typical of people who lived in the ghettos of America. People want to fetishize, promote and romanticize this 'aesthetic', without understanding or knowing the history and or social/cultural aspects of what they want to represent. They want to pluck the flower, yet ignore the roots.

Koreaboos or weaboos or whichever are no different to me. It just that, with the weeaboos and the like, their.....enthusiasm is more evident due to the worldwide popularity of whichever niche they pursue which is connected to a different culture.

But now, we're talking extremeties. Is there a way to healthily indulge in, or be drawn to a culture, while being understanding of its roots, implications, structure, philosophy, background, and history? Absolutely.

There's a difference between wanting to surround yourself with Japanese culture, because you want to fulfill your various forms of fantasies and romanticisms inspired by misunderstanding a culture through a medium -- and then wanting to surround yourself with Japanese culture after educating yourself on fact vs. fiction, and accepting the good and understanding the bad in it.

 

[TanteRegenbogen]

Nobelia, I am asking myself if you are taking it a bit far?

 

[Axel The Englishman]

Nobelia I myself would like to have molten gold coursing through my veins.

 

[Nobelia]

Nobelia, I am asking myself if you are taking it a bit far?

Maybe? Well, I do tend to like to analyze the deeper aspect of things. What I’m saying of course does not apply to everyone.

Which parts did you have in mind when you said this? Just curious.

 

[Nobelia]

Nobelia I myself would like to have molten gold coursing through my veins.

It’ll be too thick to make a run through our blood vessels. XD

 

[cock_cocker42]

I don't hate them except when they're cringey about it

 

[softbun]

i think that they should express their own race, and just because kpop is popular, doesn't mean you should look / act like koreans.
i think that learning the korean language is awesome though, and an american that wants to do that should do that, and nobody should look at them, and say that they're a koreaboo.
"just for the aesthetics" is mega stupid, if i have to say so myself. i have an asian friend, and she's been my friend since i was small, when i didn't know anything about aesthetics or kpop or whatever.
but like, if you're doing stuff like this just to be noticed, or just to have the attention all on you, i think it's wrong.

 

[Risky]

First generation Asian immigrant here. I think the fascination goes both ways. For every westerner enamoured by kpop and/or anime, there's an Asian person who's just as into American and/or European culture. It's not necessarily a bad thing to be interested in other cultures. There's nothing wrong with a bit of enthusiasm either... as long as it doesn't go overboard, of course (and I've honestly yet to meet a stereotypical weaboo overkill ... or at least one that wasn't ethnically Asian themselves ...).

 

[Caligula]

In response to the romanticization part in particular, I don't really have much to add except for the fact that it's always very weird for me to see people prop up certain East Asian countries as utopias. Not that there isn't anything great about these countries or that I want people to just trash them, it's just that people seem to think everyone in East Asia is happy, thin and extremely respectful 24/7. Like for example, people who talk about the low percentages of sexual assault in Japan without thinking of all the people that don't report their assaults for various reasons.
I'm probably too sensitive, but it makes me a little uncomfortable seeing certain things glossed over or whitewashed (in a moral sense, not racial) because it almost feels like a bit of a dismissal of what some of the citizens of these countries go through.

 

[TanteRegenbogen]

Maybe? Well, I do tend to like to analyze the deeper aspect of things. What I’m saying of course does not apply to everyone.

Which parts did you have in mind when you said this? Just curious.

Going all meta on it and asserting that weeaboos only have a superficial or even ethnically insensitive knowledge of said culture

 

[allure]

ohhh boy. i'm not the end-all-be-all on the topic obviously but

a) i'm southeast asian and i easily pass as east asian so i experience that fetishizing stuff all the time as i also live in a predominantly non-asian community
b) i was friends with a full-fledged koreaboo for a long time
c) i like kpop, asian makeup, and anime​

so i think i could provide good insight but i'm sure some of what i say has already been said/is obvious to people.

i also want to clarify that every time i say "asian" below, i mean east asian. other asian countries are deeply underrepresented. i will be focusing on the holy trinity of korea, japan, and china.

- why do non-asian people want to be asian?

Spoiler

they're insecure. to put it simply, weeaboos and koreaboos are not happy with themselves as people. it usually has to do with being unsatisfied with their appearance or their life in general. they want to be more goodlooking and/or they want their life to be more interesting, so they escape into a false identity based on highly romanticized and dumbed down portrayals of korean/japanese people.

people who are comfortable with themselves simply do not feel the need to become a different person.

my former friend who was a koreaboo fully rejected her family's culture (which, from the few times she did mention it, was actually pretty interesting) in favor of lying and claiming she was korean. she displayed some serious self-hating and attention-seeking behavior like badmouthing the people she was jealous of, making up elaborate stories about her own "korean"-ness, and putting on a fake, cutesy persona instead of showing her honest self.

- why do people want to be friends with me/and or other asian people just for the aesthetics?

Spoiler

because east asian entertainment media is centered around aesthetics. popular anime are beautifully drawn/animated. the kpop industry spends exorbitant amounts of money on making their music videos (and their idols) look good. the expectation for celebrities to be attractive is huge compared to in the west. there's a reason why some online clothing stores warn you about their merchandise being in "asian sizing" (which means the sizes are much smaller than the sizes in america). the culture in those countries is that beauty goes hand in hand with success.

in most cases in kpop, talent is secondary to visuals, even if no one wants to admit it. anime characters are usually cute and physically flawless, since they're drawings. it seems ridiculous for people to base their identity off a drawing, but anime fan culture idolizes these characters and makes them very real. these anime characters therefore become worthy of being a role model or the "ideal" to fans. weeaboos try to copy that ideal.

the same goes for kpop. korean idols are heralded as the epitome of beauty in korea. an insane amount of time, money, and attention goes into maintaining an idol's appearance because it's a very, very important aspect of their job. fans who put these idols on pedestals also see them as the "ideal" and want to emulate that.

- how do i educate people about the diversity of asian cultures?

Spoiler

i guess talk more about different cultures; not just the aspects presented in kpop, anime, or asian dramas; and if the other person is truly interested, then they will listen and learn. you have to be well-educated on the culture(s) you're talking about in order for this to work since you don't want to just be spreading more cliches and misinformation.

- have you had any experiences with asian fetishism?

Spoiler

i was hit on by an old man on a bus after i sneezed. he said i had a cute voice/sneeze and that i was a "cute little oriental girl."
the wallpaper of my laptop is a picture of bts, the kpop group. i was helping a stranger print her essay because she didn't know how to operate the school printers. when she saw that i was a fan of bts, her first question was "are you korean?!" in an overly enthusiastic tone of voice. like, why does that matter so much to you?
my ex-girlfriend was accused of having yellow fever for the duration of our relationship just because we both liked anime. she didn't fetishize me, but in a way, i felt like everyone who accused her of having yellow fever was? it felt like they were saying the only reason why you would want to date an asian girl is because they're "exotic."

that's all the incidents i can think of off the top of my head