starboob
lover / leaver
♕ PRINCESS VERITY (EXILED) ♕
With a disappointed sigh, Verity starts to pull away from the captain as she chastises her. Though it is well within the captain's right to be upset with the princess, especially as she has inadvertently touched a nerve, she had hopes for them both that they were beyond petty insults. It stings, of course, but at this point she doesn't have the energy to engage in this sort of behavior. If this is how Iskra wants to be then so be it. All the more power to her, but Verity will not be baited into another argument––not when the last left them with wounds that still haven't closed. Idly, she only nods in response, acknowledging the statement and choosing not to discuss this matter any further as she browses through a selection of statues made from scrap metal. (Perhaps, were she a bigger person, she would apologize for the offense, because even she can recognize that intent matters not when the Consequences of one's actions are thorns stuck in someone else. It is possible that later she will come around and see that Iskra's reaction has little to do with her, per se, and more to do with the pirate's own mountain like opinions and positions––something she should be more or less accustomed to with all the Time spent with Iskra. For now, however, it is best for her to bite her tongue.)
"Right, shall we move on to look––" 'ing at floral arrangements,' would have been how she ended that sentence, eager to move them away from the topic she thought would have been fun to discuss with one who she assumed is a fellow romantic. However, such is not the case as Iskra walks back on her earlier statement and chooses to instead share more of herself with the princess. As honored as she wants to feel for finally having earned enough of Iskra's heart that she is willing to be so open with her, she almost Regrets it. For entirely selfish reasons, too. It's not that she cannot accept this, it would be foolish for her to deny such a thing, as Iskra had so clearly pointed out earlier, but, well, the truth stuns her. So much so she stops in her tracks, her face contorted into deep thought as she tries to put together all of these puzzle pieces into an image that makes sense. But honestly? Truthfully? This doesn't make sense to Verity. Or maybe it does and she just doesn't know how to make Iskra's truth fit into what she wants to be true. It's upsetting to say the least and this Time, Verity is not only thinking about what this means for her own, apparently misplaced affections for the captain, but she also thinks of how upsetting this must be for the captain. To ache and know there is no pill or potion to take away the Pain. Even if inured to such a reality, she cannot imagine that one can simply pretend they are fine.
And Iskra seems to be proof of that with her lifeless laugh, even if she can explain her predicament with distance that only logic can provide. At the same Time, it sounds as though it is not that she is incapable of love or being love, but she has closed herself off to the experience entirely since she already has been promised to this Shade. Maybe that is where the crux of her anguish lies, in the bitter belief that she has already been claimed. Somewhere, Verity can empathize with that sentiment for if she were promised to someone she had no love for, she might also have acid on her tongue when it comes to romance. In that analogy, she can also see why Iskra does not believe it is fair to try to offer herself to another.
While she does think it is bold of Iskra to presume what would be enough for another, she does not argue against this. (Perhaps because she remembers the last Time she had tried to tell the pirate that she was enough and how little evidence she had to corroborate her sentiments. Even if she still stands behind that sentiment, she remembers how disappointed Iskra had been when she could say nothing to support her claim. Another Time, when she knows more of Iskra, she shall rectify that misstep.) Besides, it does not seem as though the captain is all that interested in dissent given how she opened this leg of their conversation. So she simply settles with, “I must admit, Iskra, that I do not understand what you have just shared. I mean not to erect barriers between us, I simply wish for you to know that it will be many weeks of wrestling with myself to come to understand your position. I am dedicated to trying, and I hope you understand that this is just not something I have ever thought to think about. Such undying people do not exist where I am from and there is very little to suggest this phenomena is particularly common, so this is all very, very new to me."
"I am sorry to hear about this Shade of yours, for denying you a semblance of normalcy. For taking so much away from you... It sounds as if you have doom written in your stars," she admits, sorrow tinging her tone though she covers it by roughly clearing her throat. "Should your Time be truly near, then if I may selfishly make this request? I would like to spend as much Time as you have left knowing you as you are. I think I would Regret not knowing all your depths," she says, keeping the strain out of her voice this Time. There is no need to burden Iskra with her Grief and despite the pangs in her chest, she does not want to be consoled. Not right now and not by the pirate. That would be most inappropriate. At least with this request she can express her Desire to not abandon the captain and the veiled promise to stay with her until that bitter end. If Iskra will allow it, that is.
She decides to not address how she feels about this in relation to her feelings for Iskra, for a number of reasons. Most of them chalking up to the fact that there is simply no reason for her to. To make this about her and her wants would be insensitive to the captain in light of everything that she has said. Still, she has trouble merely keeping her opinions to herself. Even as she tries to bury herself in brief exchange with a shop vendor, haggling the price to what is actually standard for the region and collects a bouquet into her arms. "Were it within my powers," she starts, "not as a princess but just as a person, I would bend the universe so that you, too, may experience what it means to love. Even if it meant defying the Shade. If that were even your wish, captain. I know it is silly and girlish, and I do believe everyone should get that chance. At least once in their life," seeming to realize how that sounds, she quickly adds, "That is not to add more salt to your wounds, just know I would be dedicated to any cause that could help you have such an experience. As it is... I suppose I can offer you an ear or a shoulder as you carry this plight with you. I cannot promise I will always understand, but what you have shared leaves me with such a lonely feeling that I would not wish for you to feel alone in this, even if you are. ...I do apologize for my earlier assumptions, I should not have spoken without knowing the full extent of your predicament."
Then, perhaps taking the stars into her own hands, she plucks a blue flower from the bouquet and slips it behind Iskra's ear. "This isn't related to any topic of love or romance," which is to say that it is, and to Verity's credit she is speaking rather matter of factly, "But I have been wondering if you would like to attend the wedding with myself? Of course, I know that we will both be there, but were we to attend together... well, we both would have a guaranteed dance partner. Not that I wouldn't mind dancing with some in the crew, but, well, I believe we have a good rhythm together." This obviously is no veiled way to ask the captain on a date. That would be preposterous as she cannot love. "That, and I rather enjoy your company."
Last edited: