Abendrot
修羅の花
Make sure you join as many RPs as possible. Sign ALL the fucking interest checks, because you certainly have the time and dedication to juggle all 9 of them.
Give your terrible roleplaying advice
- Thread starter OrenjiGatsu
- Start date
Borkus Lazorus
Senior Member
ROLEPLAYERS HATE HIM!
Roleplayer's secret technique allowed him to unlock the secret to becoming the most majestic roleplayer across all of the Internet. Follow the steps below and discover how you too can become an awesome roleplayer using these ancient formulas derived from translating the manuscripts of the most oldest role-player of all time, Trollimius the Third.
1) Never listen to criticism. You are perfect the way you are. Why listen to advice that might potentially lower your self-esteem and ruin your confidence? You. Are. Awesome. Don't deny it.
2) Always bump your interest checks relentlessly instead of making a new thread.
3) Focus on using massive amounts of BBcode in all of your posts to spruce up your writing. It's not like the quality of the writing is derived from the content rather than the graphical characteristics of the post itself.
4) Never use proper paragraphing! Screw that! You are an avant-garde roleplayer. Did you know what the french word 'avant-garde' means? Well, it's a super-duper awesome special word that means you are unique if you break all the rules and conventions of literature! In fact, why don't you screw grammar as well? That's super-avant-garde as well!
5) Always remember that you have no life outside of role-playing. Role-playing is love. Role-playing is life!
If you want to know more, call this number right now: 1-300-888-333, and tell us the details of your bank account number to receive 100,000 dollars in exchange for only your time and attention!
Roleplayer's secret technique allowed him to unlock the secret to becoming the most majestic roleplayer across all of the Internet. Follow the steps below and discover how you too can become an awesome roleplayer using these ancient formulas derived from translating the manuscripts of the most oldest role-player of all time, Trollimius the Third.
1) Never listen to criticism. You are perfect the way you are. Why listen to advice that might potentially lower your self-esteem and ruin your confidence? You. Are. Awesome. Don't deny it.
2) Always bump your interest checks relentlessly instead of making a new thread.
3) Focus on using massive amounts of BBcode in all of your posts to spruce up your writing. It's not like the quality of the writing is derived from the content rather than the graphical characteristics of the post itself.
4) Never use proper paragraphing! Screw that! You are an avant-garde roleplayer. Did you know what the french word 'avant-garde' means? Well, it's a super-duper awesome special word that means you are unique if you break all the rules and conventions of literature! In fact, why don't you screw grammar as well? That's super-avant-garde as well!
5) Always remember that you have no life outside of role-playing. Role-playing is love. Role-playing is life!
If you want to know more, call this number right now: 1-300-888-333, and tell us the details of your bank account number to receive 100,000 dollars in exchange for only your time and attention!
ShiyaRose
flower power
Don't EVER talk to your RP partner OOC, they don't exist outside of the RP.
Silly Little Guy
M-O-R-E More More Jump! (She/They)
Never fully read someone’s interest checks. Just read the title and message then.
StrixDesmodus
Totally human, I swear!
- Prattle endlessly in narrations Make sure that while very little happens in the story, there will always be a great many words to describe it.
- Refer to this field of skill as "Language Farts."
- Narrate such a continuous succession of events in a single post that nobody will ever know how to make their character react. Roleplay is a game of confusion and trickery.
And now, something that I do that I'm aware isn't everyone's cup of tea....
- Name your character something like "Priscilla Godzilla."
Ezina-Kusu
Junior Member
Don't worry about remembering anything about your character or the RP that has been previously established. You are in control, none of it is real so you can say that anything happens. Also never have your characters actions need consequences, just change their personality, ideals and opinions to make it so they are never directly to blame for anything. If anyone calls you out on this then of course take it as a personal attack and hold a grudge against them. You are infallible, the perfection amongst all writers and can do no wrong.
Simon_Hawk
Ranger
Listening to
Ezina-Kusu
for, well, anything really. Especially RP advice. Just...don't.
Ezina-Kusu
for, well, anything really. Especially RP advice. Just...don't.
Aarix
Very well.
These hot tips apply to all writing, but especially RP!
Never reuse a noun. Ever. You absolutely must descend into increasingly esoteric synonyms/noun-phrases, since repeating any word is a sin--highschool English class told you so! Pronouns won't cut it either--everybody knows you can't rely on your reader to be intelligent enough to remember what you were writing about in the previous sentence based on contextual cues.
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Also, if there's a fancier word you can use you should definitely use it. This lets everyone know you're a good writer, especially when you combine it with the above rule. To show that you're a really good writer, avoid re-using proper nouns, such as names, too. Here's another example:
Never reuse a noun. Ever. You absolutely must descend into increasingly esoteric synonyms/noun-phrases, since repeating any word is a sin--highschool English class told you so! Pronouns won't cut it either--everybody knows you can't rely on your reader to be intelligent enough to remember what you were writing about in the previous sentence based on contextual cues.
BAD:
She held the sword aloft for all to see--it caught the light just right. After an appropriately dramatic moment, she sheathed it at her hip.
"As you can see, I've got a pretty bitchin' sword."
The townsfolk nodded in awed agreement. None of them had ever seen a sword quite so bitchin' in all their lives.
GOOD:
She held the sword aloft for all to see. The blade caught the light just right. After an appropriately dramatic moment, she sheathed the weapon at her hip.
"As you can see, I've got a pretty bitchin' saber."
The townsfolk nodded in agreement, since they were awed by the finely-honed steel. None of them had ever seen a particular weapon consisting typically of a long, straight or slightly curved, pointed blade having one or two cutting edges and set into a hilt quite so bitchin' in all their lives.
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Also, if there's a fancier word you can use you should definitely use it. This lets everyone know you're a good writer, especially when you combine it with the above rule. To show that you're a really good writer, avoid re-using proper nouns, such as names, too. Here's another example:
BAD:
Harriet looked into Leon's eyes. She noticed, for the first time, that his irises were flecked with gold.
"What are you looking at," he murmured.
She blinked.
"...Nothing."
"...Nothing."
GOOD:
Harriet peered into the tall man's emerald orbs. The raven-haired female descried, for the first time, that the handsome nobleman's viridian optics were variegated with flaxen particles.
"What are you looking at," the precisely-6'1"-male of Lithuanian descent murmured.
She blinked her amethyst visual sensory organs.
"...Nothing."
AverageSeer
New Member
Fit as many characters into your roleplay as possible. (Even if you can't handle it) Interduce one then forget about them. Have characters that in no way fit the tone of the story. Steal other peoples OCs. Make carbon copies of canon characters! Think of it like a game, the more the better!
GojiBean
Your resident irradiated Kaiju King
Open a Group RP and don't invite anyone to join. Just post and post and post for yourself until your character finishes their story and call the RP "Complete."
Oh, and you have to create only Mary Sue/Stu characters because all that "struggle" and "obstacle" nonsense is for chumps. Characters with no flaws are the way to go.
If you must invite other people to RP with you, make sure they're as inexperienced as possible and have the worst grammar you've ever seen. Makes you look better.
Lastly, if all else fails just join every RP you see the pops up without asking to join and post a God-tier character going around one-shot killing all the other participant's characters so only yours is left as they walk into the sunset to "end" the RP as soon as it begins.
Oh, and you have to create only Mary Sue/Stu characters because all that "struggle" and "obstacle" nonsense is for chumps. Characters with no flaws are the way to go.
If you must invite other people to RP with you, make sure they're as inexperienced as possible and have the worst grammar you've ever seen. Makes you look better.
Lastly, if all else fails just join every RP you see the pops up without asking to join and post a God-tier character going around one-shot killing all the other participant's characters so only yours is left as they walk into the sunset to "end" the RP as soon as it begins.
Derealization
Conductor of the crazy train
All characters should be Mary Sues and you should NEVER use proper grammar
Nicodemus.
𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝓈𝑒𝑒 𝓂𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝒶 𝒸𝓇𝑜𝓌𝓃
run on sentences are you're friend use them too great affect they will really help
muffinphobia
dancing witch
Control other people's characters for them without consent. Sometimes they can't come up with decent ideas and that's okay! You can fix it for them!
Nicodemus.
𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝓈𝒽𝑜𝓊𝓁𝒹 𝓈𝑒𝑒 𝓂𝑒 𝒾𝓃 𝒶 𝒸𝓇𝑜𝓌𝓃
Roleplaying is not a collaborative activity. This is a common misconception. You alone are telling a story and everyone else is along for the ride, reacting in ways you've implied they should. So, to hell with their posts, their characters, and their ideas. What matters most is your vision for the roleplay.
TaperedNightjar
Earth-bound Misfit
Open an RP and then be the member who is online the least. In fact, never be online at all. Then be sad when your rp dies.
Abyss
It's lonely in the deep
Being involved in a 1x1 RP automatically entitles you to 100% of your writing partners time and attention. If they don't respond to you ASAP then clearly they don't care and you need to explain to them in extreme detail why they're being bad. If they disagree with you, then your being gaslighted and you need explain more until they see the errors of their ways. If they don't reply at all, you should reach out to all their other platforms. It's simple courtesy.
Atarashii
Account is in the process of getting suspended
1. ♚✌ 𝓦ＲĮ𝓽乇 ίｎ тᕼ𝐞 ᵐ𝔬şŦ ǗήŕєÃⒹÃ𝓫l𝓔 𝓕ᗝ𝐧ᵗ, Ⓐ𝓓𝒹 Ⓐ𝓛ⓛ ŦⒽᵉ €𝔵Ｔŕ卂 乇𝓜𝐎Ｊ丨ş Ａ𝓃𝔡 𝕄Δⓚέ ι𝕥 ş𝐓Ⓤ𝓅ᶤｄ ᵇｕ𝕤ч. Į𝓣 ⓡ𝔼𝔞𝓵ᒪү 𝕊ＨㄖωČᵃ𝕤ⓔ𝔰 Ƴㄖ𝕌𝐫 ᵖｅʳ𝕤ØⓃ𝓪𝐥𝐈Ťү 
2. Whats grammer? Commas, quotation marks and periods don't exist here. Or anything else for that matter.
3. Make sure your character has no weaknesses, everyone loves them, no one hates them, they are GOD
4. Oh wow you sure posted a lot! I'll just skip over it and write my post that is completely irrelevant. My way or the highway.
5. Spelling? Im not sure wat your talking about. Its just that thing the teachers fuss about for no raison besides who cares about spelling when i can make my chairacter be the scenter of antention.
6. Bold the useless words. It's really an eye catcher if you think about it. And make them all random sizes for the extra effect.
7. Screw rules, who said you were bound by words on a screen?
8. MΛKΣ ƧЦЯΣ ПӨ ӨПΣ ЦПDΣЯƧƬΛПDƧ YӨЦ ΛПD ΉΛƬΣƧ YӨЦ. ЩΉӨ ƧΛID ЯPIПG ΉΛD ƬӨ BΣ FЦП?
9. Ghost. Everyone loves ghosts and ghosters. When you post, make sure to expect a response 5 seconds later but when they post or ask a question, you leave them hanging...for a week...or two.
10. Steal. Steal. Steal. Your brain cells are kinda dead right now, so why not take a gander and see what other people have written? It doesn't hurt to draw some inspiration...or hit the ctrl C and ctrl V key (:
2. Whats grammer? Commas, quotation marks and periods don't exist here. Or anything else for that matter.
3. Make sure your character has no weaknesses, everyone loves them, no one hates them, they are GOD
4. Oh wow you sure posted a lot! I'll just skip over it and write my post that is completely irrelevant. My way or the highway.
5. Spelling? Im not sure wat your talking about. Its just that thing the teachers fuss about for no raison besides who cares about spelling when i can make my chairacter be the scenter of antention.
6. Bold the useless words. It's really an eye catcher if you think about it. And make them all random sizes for the extra effect.
7. Screw rules, who said you were bound by words on a screen?
8. MΛKΣ ƧЦЯΣ ПӨ ӨПΣ ЦПDΣЯƧƬΛПDƧ YӨЦ ΛПD ΉΛƬΣƧ YӨЦ. ЩΉӨ ƧΛID ЯPIПG ΉΛD ƬӨ BΣ FЦП?
9. Ghost. Everyone loves ghosts and ghosters. When you post, make sure to expect a response 5 seconds later but when they post or ask a question, you leave them hanging...for a week...or two.
10. Steal. Steal. Steal. Your brain cells are kinda dead right now, so why not take a gander and see what other people have written? It doesn't hurt to draw some inspiration...or hit the ctrl C and ctrl V key (:
