Fandom Fate/Bad Joke

[The One Eyed Bandit]

A Grail War. Set in the streets of London and under the watchful gaze of the Clock Tower itself. One that had learned from the mistakes of the Fuyuki Grail Wars, that would be executed to the letter and finally play the gateway to the ambitions of the Mage's Association. Headed by a trusted Overseer, and played out by the Tower's finest students. A ritual that was a war in name only.

But...

Night turns to day, only hours remain before the war begins. Then, eight bodies are discovered. The Overseer is dead at his altar, the Masters lifeless in their homes, and the Lesser Grail has vanished without a trace. Meanwhile, a poorly dressed man patiently awaits his guests for the day, seven strangers awake with a queer tattoo upon their hand, a gift lays beside their beds, and London goes about its daily business without a care in the world

Hey, you've been selected for the seasonal 'Holy Grail War', a riveting contest for all your heart's desires. Inside, you'll find a gift, easy instructions, a train ticket, and a marked map. Hop to it!"​

 

[The One Eyed Bandit]

Are you a tourist? A native? A wanderer?

No, from this day forward you are a 'Master'. Whether mundane or magical, your everyday life is changed irrevocably. On the same morning as the failure of the much anticipated London Grail War is discovered, you in turn make a discovery of your own. While others find death and tragedy, you find opportunity. Command Seals, something that some will recognize and some will not, appear upon your body and a gift has appeared eerily at your bedside.

It's not even anywhere near Christmas.

Besides the potential alarm raised by the prospect of someone breaking into your home, hotel, or wherever it is that you chose to spend the night, you're curious. The magically inclined will recognize what lays upon your body within moments. You weren't chosen for this war. That much you know. Those of the normal world, perhaps, might wonder how exactly you were tattooed without your knowing. Did it have anything to do with the festively packaged box in your room, or did you just have one drink too many the previous night? Maybe that explained the gift, too.

Inside the box you all find something similar. A glass sphere covered in ritualistic-looking, crimson runes, with something ancient looking encased within. At least, as far as you can tell. The moment you lay eyes upon it, light fills the room. By the time your vision clears, you are no longer alone.

Before you stands another figure, radiating

...Maybe you should check the box for a card or something.

 

[ChazGhost]

Spoiler: The Hotel Room

Melvin woke up lavish hotel room he had been staying in sense he can to London. Melvin had no big plans for day and planned to just to plan by ear. But as he got up his eye catch a mysterious looking tattoos. Taking a closer look and thinking for a second he realized the mark on his hand could be command seal for the Grail War. But Melvin was confused by this as he recently heard rumor that the Grail War contestants were already chosen. So now the question came, why did he have a command seal? Before he could think further on this he looked to his side and saw a festive looking gift box. ...Well the plot thicken it seems... Melvin thought before opening the box and looking.

He saw a glass sphere covered in ritualistic-looking symbols with a strange ancient object inside. Before he could further study it light filled the room. "What the hell..." Melvin yelled rubbing his eyes. Once he opened his eyes again he saw a figure radiating light. "Well I guess this happened... So Who are you, my dear?" Melvin stated staying calm looking at the figure in front of him.
theunderwolf The One Eyed Bandit

 

[theunderwolf]

Cool mist flooded the room And dissipated slowly, revealing Archer's lithe form. Not standing much on ceremony she looked around. Some kind of Inn, high in the air in the city she assumed to be London. It was her first time being summoned as a servant and she flexed her arms experimentally. She was weaker then she was normally. A symptom of being summoned without her full powers. Her bow and arrows were still with her though, she drew an arrow and felt the weight, then flicked her bowstring, which was perfectly tensed as always. Then finally she turned to her Master and looked him over. He was slightly taller then her and in his late 20s. He looked like a Brit, which made her grind her teeth. Why couldn't she have been summoned by one of her own. But it was fine, she could work with it. "I am the Archer class servant you summoned master," She said, voice completely emotionless, "Were you expecting something else?"

 

[Gaius Danius Griinia]

Jun awoke to the sound of his phone alarm. It blared into his ear and cut through the nightmare he was having. It was the same nightmare he had every other night. The one about the events that killed his parents and left him an orphan. Sure he had found a new family with Master Fang, however he still felt the pain of losing loved ones. Sitting up, Jun noticed he was still wearing all of his clothes. Then he remembered all the travelling to get back to London had left him exhausted. He hadn't been to this city in years, so he got lost. Then it took him a while to find a hotel so when he finally got one, he just collapsed into the bed after locking his door. Clicking his neck and straightening out his clothes, Jun went for the shower.

Then he noticed the box. It was festive looking and just begged to be opened. Jun was very concerned, this box was not here when he got the room. If it were a complimentary thing he would have noticed. "Nine times out of ten, a mysterious box appearing in a hotel room is nothing good" Jun said, apprehensively. Deciding to take a shower first, Jun ignored the box. If that box had waited for Jun to wake up. It could wait for Jun to clean himself and have some breakfast. In the shower, Jun looked over the red mark on his hand. It was shaped like some kind of bird. A hawk? A sparrow? Maybe it was an eagle, although that would be pushing it. After he cleaned, watered and fed himself, Jun went for the box. Opening it, he saw a glass orb covered in strange markings. "Oh yeaahhhhh, like this is something I should touch". However, before he left. Master Fang had told Jun to take chances on this journey. Taking hold of the orb, Jun braced himself as a light covered the room.

 

[Xel]

SaberJun's Hotel Room​

As the light dimmed a figure was shone kneeling in it's place. The woman was clad in ornate crimson garb with an equally fiery ponytail flowing down her back. Her stance was one of submission, as if an audience before their king as she kept her eyes downcast. Before the man even had a chance to speak the woman let out words of her own. "Are you my--" Her words were abruptly cut off as her eyes shot open. This was not her voice. Certainly she would know, she had lived with it all her life. The woman got to her feet, looking down at her own form as a frown played across her lips. After a quick examination she turned her gaze on the man she assumed to be her Master, the displeasure clear as day within her eyes as well as her voice. "Is this some kind of joke? Were my deeds in life so suspect that you would render this humiliation upon me?"

The woman let out a sigh as she brought a hand up to rub her eyes before yet again speaking up, not ever once letting the man get a word in. "Nevermind, the form is irrelevant so long as I can achieve my goal." She dropped her hand to her side and stared directly into her Master's eyes, finding herself to be just a smidge taller than the man. "I am Saber, summoned forth into this war to achieve both of our wishes. And you are..." Her words drifted off as she scanned the room she found herself in. With nary another soul to be found she returned her gaze to the man and continued. "My master I assume."

The answer to the question was obvious, it's statement only needed for ceremony. As such she cared little for the answer she already knew and made her way past the man to walk through the meager room. The grail had given her knowledge of the modern era but there was much it neglected to tell her. Upon reaching the window she looked out at the cityscape that sprawled out before her. While she could note many similarities the engineering prowess of man was obviously far removed from her time. The majesty of modern man was not the sole thought within her mind. The cramped streets, the fact that the city stretched beyond the horizon, the towering structures. The entire environment would make her brand of combat quite difficult to say the least. Having neglected her Master too long she spun on her heel to once more face the man. "So, Master, I take it you have some kind of strategy in mind for the war, yes?"

Gaius Danius Griinia

 

[ChazGhost]

"Archer..." Melvin said before looking Archer over before looking to the command seal on his hand. ... I guess this is the real deal... interesting... Melvin then looked back to Archer. ...So this is servant... I never excepted to meet one let alone be one's master... Fate is a interesting mistress... Melvin cough before saying "To be truthful I was not excepting you... Or this command seal on my hand or really anything really special today for that matter but it seems fate has plans for me..." Melvin said before glancing back to present box. "Or at least some one has plans for me it seems... Oh sorry" Melvin said with a sigh. "My apologizes my dear Archer, I forgot to introduce myself" Melvin said shaking his head. "I am Melvin D. Rogers." Melvin said with a bow. "Now with introductions out of the way..." Melvin said straightening himself again before going back to the box. "Let's see what other mysterious my strange gift box holds." Melvin finished saying before searching though the rest of the present.

theunderwolf The One Eyed Bandit

 

[SCSaya06]

“You know something? I used to think being some kind of gumshoe was cool. I don’t know about the rest but the notion of snooping around fancy bars and parking out at sketchy motels appealed to 16-year old yours truly at the time. And so, I underwent all that studying, all that training for what is essentially a dead-end job. Things sure do look different to the same person at different stages in their lives. I guess it just took me longer than most people.

Granted I managed to tackle a few difficult cases. Cases that actually make you think. It’s how I managed to get my connections you know? Having them can be really handy for when your fridge and bank account’s running empty. They hook you up with some interesting stuff or stuff they don’t want to bother sticking their noses in themselves. Without them, I would still be following estranged girlfriends of corporate bigwigs for four figure payments. Barely enough to cover a month’s worth of bills.

So, when my “connections” found me a particularly interesting case, I knew I just had to take it. Besides, the pay was good: Six figures practically screaming my name. All I need to do is to find a man gone missing, after emptying the family bank account; the parents obviously suspecting a deserter who didn’t want to take up the Crest. Oh, did I mention he was a Magus?

Yeah, I’m familiar with their world and by extension, their arts. How’d you think a young upstart like me would’ve gotten far with just a few tools and the clothes on my back? Surely you didn’t think I was some kind of prodigy now? A real-life Sherlock Holmes. Nah, the explanation is a lot simple. How do you bridge the gap between the talented and the mundane? The answer: Magic.

I’m getting off track. Anyway, his last known location was right here in London; good o’l Square Mile, Old Smoke London. Found the man three days later at the second floor of an upscale apartment; bastard had apparently forgotten to pay his rent. Me and the landlady found him dead at his desk. No sign of foul play, nor forced entry. Bed had been made and the fridge is well stocked to last at least another week. It’s like he just decided to sit down at the desk and suddenly, he just gave up living.

This man—I’ll just call him Mr. Holt. Yeah, that works. Well, he wasn’t exactly the most interesting man alive. Oxford graduate, affluent computer programmer down south. Just bought a new navy-blue Jaguar last week too. Lucky bastard. He got reservations at the fancy fine dining down the road; a reservation that’s cancelled unfortunately. From the way I look at it, this doesn’t seem like a guy who would kill himself. Was he killed? Perhaps. Couldn’t just take one of his eyes though, even if it would’ve helped. Otherwise they’ll think I did it.

Hey lady? Mind explaining to us what an eye is doing in your pocket?

So, I explained it to the family. Father was hysterical. Don’t know if he’s actually sad about losing his own son or losing the prospect of transferring his Crest to an established man and I don’t think I care either way. I didn’t want to leave the poor folk hanging though so I promised them that I would catch whoever killed their son. They offered to double my fee if I did.

Bingo.”

The red-haired lady stopped to take a sip of the glass of red wine set on the table, her eyes gazing out to the dim city light flashing outside her window, her fingers clutching the rim of the wine glass, letting the ice rustle from time to time. Hyde Park was eerily beautiful at this time of night, with the array of lights dyeing it in a cacophony of strange colors. Never taking her eyes off the scenery, she took the bottle from the table and poured another glass. Instead of drinking it, she gently places the glass back along with the bottle, letting it slide a bit with a flick of her finger.

“And so, I had to continue. I rented this small place; my own personal headquarters so to speak, at least until I finish this case. From the looks of the marks though and that odd box left behind at my doorstep without me noticing—this rabbit hole is looking a hell lot deeper than your usual would-be assassins and cheating girlfriends. And for some odd twist of fate or unlucky coincidence, I’m now part of it. A new shadow in this dangerous puppet play.”

The woman leaned back on her chair which had been pushed all the way towards the wall, her dark nightdress blending in with the heavy curtains and red velvet walls, odd colors mixing together in the dim light of a small, violet lampshade left open. Her gaze shifts from the empty Hyde Park to the majestic figure she suddenly found sharing the quiet room with her, her lips curling into a small smile.

“Isn’t that right? My beautiful visitor from the magic box?”

Iskandar

 

[Iskandar]

Rider​

The light seemed to last longer than normal, it continued to illuminate the room until slowly dimming. The light surrounded the figure, clung to her like clothing and turned into a bright a gold color. The figure stood their, chest puffed out and hands firmly placed on their hips, only a silhouette was recognizable. They'd listen as the only other person in the room spoke. Spoke about herself, her past and why she was in London. What she did and what she was doing. The woman in the room seemed like a capable person, someone that knew how to get things done. At the very least, she wasn't stupid. Truthfully, she was probably the best person Rider could have been paired up with and once the woman addressed Rider, they stepped out from the light that clung to them, a toothy grin on their face.

Rider was around 5'10" in height and around 155 lbs of lean muscle. Her skin was a golden brown, and her eye a crimson red(the left one covered by an eyepatch), with her hair being oddly platinum blonde. Rider was clad in armor befitting one of royalty, its colors were brown with a gold trim, "Indeed it is, oh gorgeous master! You have entered the most dangerous of games." Rider looked upon the woman who sat in the chair her toothy grin still there, and spoke with a ferocious roar, "Fear not! For you have summoned the strongest of Servants! And I promise that one with such beauty as yourself shall not perish!" Rider's grin grew even larger, "I do hope you can handle me, Master. I won't have any pushovers as my Master." Rider looked around the room before walking towards her master, and stopped in front of her. She peered down at the woman in a dark nightdress before offering her a hand, "Now, shall we begin Master!" Her voice much more softer this time, almost a whisper.

SCSaya06

 

[BearBearBear]

The windows told of how night had ended; the moon was beginning to set as the stars began to fade away. Dawn was still an eternity away when her voice broke the silence. No one could feel as the miracle took hold and came to life; a quiet spell, meant only to carry wind where it did not go.

...

"I've been chosen as one of them, but I'm sure you already knew that, didn't you?"

...

"Yes, I understand what I have to do. It isn't the first time I worked with such death but I'd still prefer this over the Spider; you still owe me for that by the way."

...

"I know I was supposed to be an observer, but now that I've been dragged into this mess, I have to participate. The fact that it further indebts you to me is no concern of mine."

...

"It's a wish, Barty! You think a bunch of idiots wouldn't risk it all of some omnipotent wish? Need I remind you that you oversaw the purification rituals yourself, the Grail is Perfect this time around!"

...

"Yes, it is probably his fault. I understand that your fellow isn't the type to act seriously all the time, but that doesn't help, especially when he's probably having tea with Alcatraz right about now."

...

"I don't need to win; The grail for my freedom. I just need to see it manifested properly and I'm sure that would be enough for us to create another, without the vampire's help this time around."

...

"Yes, I'll be in touch, with you and Atlas."

...

"Of course. Good day, Your Majesty."

Where one spell died, another came to take it's place; a seamless transition that spoke of skill and practice.

As soon as the tiny voice in her ear stopped speaking, Alexandria Bartholomew Rehema rose from the sheets and beamed. It was a beautiful thing, alluring yet cold, enticing and yet unmistakably vicious. Still there was a warmth there, there was gentleness and tranquility, though such peace belied what hid underneath; the Blood of one of the Eldest of Wise Men. With the grace befitting her station, she sat perfectly upright and made her way towards the middle of the room, where an opened box sat on a tastefully carved table. Within that box was the strange sphere that started this nonsense.

The bed, a massive piece of workmanship speaking volumes of the luxury she casually indulged in, all but imploded as soon as her skin left the gossamer embrace of its covers. No trace of it was allowed to continue being; no one would be faulted if they were to deny that the luxurious piece of furniture ever existed.

Everything in her way suffered the same fate until she walked in a perfectly straight line until she stood, clad in nothing but a robe, before her companion

There, close to the door and beyond what served as the reception area of the room, stood a figure. To the woman's surprise, the figure unharmed despite the dangers that lurked all, traps wrought by the Magus' hand. The room was entirely empty by then, the space that could rival the pride of emperors robbed of its wealth in a fit of rage. Everything else was all but erased in an act of perfectly controlled destruction and in an instant, only the table and the two opulent couches flanking it, remained. Alexandria all but glided towards the strange intruder, no hint of fear or hesitation marring her grin even as she emptied the room in a manner that would leave even the Director sweating.

"Now..." . Her voice was a fickle thing, to be able to heal and harm, to calm and to crush. To the voice, she spoke like and old friend, but to the being that stumbled into her room, into her very sanctum, she spoke with a voice that promised nothing good will. "What is it that you want out of this?"

Misuteeku

 

[Mion]

Master of Lancer
​

The young girl awoke on the floor of the house that she had grown so accustomed to. 'My Lord?' she thought to herself as she sat up, looking around the room for the man who had been taking care of her. But he was nowhere to be found. She got up to one knee before she began to notice things, a weird looking shape on the ground. It almost looked like something the Lord gave her a while ago, it had only happened once every now and then but the Lord always seemed eager that he gave her something during that time. She had never understood it but always wore a big smile as that seemed to please the Lord very much. "Did he leave that here for me?" She thought to herself as she remembered that the Lord had spoke about being gone for a short while. He had told her that she must wait only a little and when he returned her dreams would have come true. She had always believed in the Lord, he was kind, gentle and caring. Not to mention a most wonderful jmagus and wisdom so great that she struggled to comprehend the scope of it. She would do as he said and wait.

The bedroom was the same as always, the large and lavish bed in the middle of the room, the backrest up against the wall and a narrow corridor to walk through between the foot of the bed and the window. To the right of the bed was some space for storage, a wardrobe, a chest and a bookshelf packed full of all different kinds of books new and old. To the left was a larger space, mostly empty aside from a small beanbag, an old desk and a chair. It was a rather large room but compared to the outside world it was so small. It was comfortable and safe enough but she would think of the nights where the Lord would take her to the park with Daisy, a dog that she had discovered was something called a border collie. She loved to play with Daisy in the parks, on the desk to her left was a vase of flowers that she had picked from one of her times out. A smile spread across her face as she finally nodded her head and reached out for the small gift box that her Lord had left for her...

But something was different. There was 3 red marks on her left hand, she let out a small yelp as she pulled the hand back to her face. She began to sniff it, was this blood? She apprehensivley stuck out her tongue a little and gave her hand a gentle lick. It was almost like there was nothing on her hand. Confused she placed her hand on the floor and looked at it again. "Hmmmph..." She let out a little grunt of defeat. They probably weren't even there. Ignoring them she finally picked up the little gift No, placing it gently on her knee as she unwrapped it carefully, wishing to not bring damage to anything that the Lord went out if his way to get her. Taking the lift off the box she stood up and placed it on the bed, now looking into it and seeing what was inside. It was a little spherical thing. Upon seeing it she stuck out her tongue again but only momentarily. "Food?!?!?" She thought as she scooped it up with both hands, quickly opening her mouth wide and trying to chuck the orb into her mouth. But as the orb flew up to hit her in the face a powerful tidal wave of light washed over her, filling the room. Blinding her the orb hits her forehead instead of the intended target of her mouth. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" she shrieked in terror as her head flung back, falling viciously to the ground as her unknown visitor took form in the room.

simj26

 

[Rantos]

Lenka
Troll under the bridge
Tags: Girouette The One Eyed Bandit
Lenka wasn't one for sleeping in. Usually, she would only get five or so hours of sleep before being told the park bench was not to be used like a bed. Today though, there was no park ranger to remove her nor mall cop to tell her the display beds are not for extended use. Today Lenka did not rise until the afternoon traffic shook her celling. Slowly she came to, roused from her slumber by the rumbling of cars, the honking, the swearing. All wonderful sounds to rise to. Though, in truth, she wanted to sleep for longer, to nestle into the groove she created in the dirt. But no matter, she could always return come nightfall. After all, the sun was up, there was money to be made and people to be punched.

So the bridge troll rose from her groove, taking a deep breath all the while and once she was on her two feet, she exhaled. The exhale was followed by a visceral clap that echoed under the confines of the bride. The clap was followed by Lenka pressing her arms against her side, bending her elbows, balling her fists, arching her back and bellowing out to the sky above. She let out a primal scream that continued until her lugs were exhausted of air. Morning ritual complete.

Ready to take the day, Lenka began to gather her few possessions. It was then she noticed that she gained a new possession over the night, which was exceedingly rare. Usually, Lenka woke to find things missing, never added. Excitement and curiosity took over, Lenka picked up the box without hesitation and opened it without second thought. Within the box was an ornate glass orb, gazing upon the orb brought a smile to the redhead's face. How nice, someone left an expensive looking trinket for Lenka to pawn. Just as the thought crossed her mind a bright light flashed, and Lenka found herself looking right at the source. She dropped the orb in her panic, fell to the ground and began reaching frantically for anything and everything. All the while yelling in distress, claiming she had gone instantly blind and demanding someone turn the sun off. In time, the light passed, Lenka got her bearings and noticed that there was now another person standing before her.

A woman with eccentric, yet alluring, clothes. Then suddenly, it all made sense. Lenka rose from the ground once more, dusting herself off, and began talking to the women.

"You're one of Zeke's men right. Don't bother answering the rhetorical question, no one would willingly dress up like a freak unless they were with Zeke." Lenka took a steps closer, eyeing the woman up and down. She didn't seem to be armed, so this clearly wasn't about the money. "I just woke up, give a few minutes then you can bring me to Zeke. Maybe we could hit up a diner on the way there, you could cover the bill and I promise I'll pay ya back but we both know I won't." While Lenka was elaborating on the game plan she slowly began getting all of her junk in order. Grabbing the box and storing it within the body of her bass drum. Once the drum was strapped to her back she pointed past the woman, indicating it was time to move.

"So, know any good places nearby? I kinda stumbled here while I was buzzed, so I have no idea where I am."

 

[Gaius Danius Griinia]

Well, weird magical ladies appearing from nowhere certainly wasn't on the brochure. All jokes aside, Jun was not sure of who or what this woman was. Although he recanted his pronoun usage when her visible alarm to her gender seemed to tick her off. Was she normally a guy? That was the only conclusion that made sense to Jun. Then the strange red haired lady identified herself as SABER. That stirred some odd memories inside his head. However her next statement helped him form a more solid idea of what was happening. She was SUMMONED, indicating she was a familiar of some kind. Although a familiar like this was new to Jun. So her name was Saber, she was probably a dude and she was summoned here to help fufill both of their wishes. There was one word he couldn't fit into this jenga tower of facts somehow... she said she was summoned for a...war?

"Are you... a Servant?"
Thinking back to his childhood, Jun remembered something his mother once told him. Remember Jun, always wash behind your ears. Okay, that was TOO FAR BACK. Then he finally remembered. The Holy Grail War, it was an event where several heroes from the past fought each other with their Masters. The grand prize for this little battle royale was some kind of Holy Grail. His mother told him about it briefly when he was very young. It was a mean way to get him to eat his vegetables. Eat all your greens Jun or I'll make you fight in a Holy Grail War. Jun's father was always quick to tell her off for doing that. All the pieces came together like a hectic and bloodstained puzzle. Jun was a Master, this was his Servant.

"I'm Jun Hyuga.... and I should have eaten more vegetables..."

Xel

 

[Xel]

SaberJun's Hotel Room​

The first words out of her Master's mouth was a question she didn't expect to hear. She narrowed her eyes at the man as she walked a few steps towards him. Surely this man would know she was indeed a servant. Surely one of her stature would not be summoned by mere accident to some bumbling fool who stumbled unwittingly into the war. She shook her head, even entertaining such a possibility was an insult to her honor. Still... The confused expression on the man's face. That question that slipped out. His inability to answer her question. As much as she didn't want to admit it, her Master seemed entirely out of the loop. She closed her eyes as she thought it through and no matter what avenue she took she always came to the same result. The man's name flowed through her ears. Jun, a simple enough name. Not that she would be using it often, if ever. After a few moments of her silent contemplation she opened her eyes, once again directing her gaze at her Master.

"Indeed. I am ***** ****** ******, a servant summoned into the Saber class to fight in this war. You would do well to address me as Saber. Names hold power and there is much you can glean from one's identity." She offered the man a quick explanation. Such a statement should be obvious for anyone participating in the war but she very much doubted her Master knew what he had gotten himself into. As she spoke she made her way over to the bed, falling back onto it as she crossed one leg over the other. Firmly seated before her Master she cast her gaze up towards him before continuing. "So tell me, Master." She made a point not to use his name, no sense in becoming familiar with someone she wouldn't be using anyways. "How much do you know about the Holy Grail War? Pardon me if I am mistaken, but you do not seem overly familiar with the current situation."

Gaius Danius Griinia

 

[The One Eyed Bandit]

Within the Box.​

The light faded from your eyes and your introductions made, the mysterious gift that antiquated you waits patiently. The sphere has turned dull, cloudy and dead looking; But other gifts still lay untouched. Sat at the base of the box, you find three papers. A train ticket, a map and a typewritten letter.

The two prior direct you to the London Tombs. The latter, delivers an unexpectedly cheery message.

To whom it may concern,

Hello and welcome!

Congratulations candidate, you've been chosen as one of the lucky few to participate in the 'Holy Grail War'! For the uninitiated, an explanation is in order. The Holy Grail War! A grand conflict in which your very lives are on the line for the grandest prize you could imagine. Your hopes, your dreams, your ambitions, all at your fingertips. The titular ultimate wishing device, the Holy Grail , could be all yours; And the rules couldn't be simpler!

First: Last Man Standing - There can only be one winning team, naturally! You've all been designated tag-teams, a Master and a Servant. It's your responsibility to eliminate all the other teams, and stand as the sole survivors. Officially speaking, you only need to eliminate all enemy Servants, but...

Second: Command Seals - The name Master is more than just a title. The lot of you have been afforded three Command Seals each, which you'll find conveniently placed upon your bodies, which allow you dominion over your respective Servants. They'll allow you to compel them to obey a command, or call them to your side. A few problem children aside, you'll find them quite infallible. Oh, but do keep the commands specific. The broader the order, the weaker the compulsion will be.

That's all! The rest is up to you. This year's Grail War, however, differs from the usual routine. After observation of the previous Wars, we've found that far too many Masters make it out scott free, so, we've determined a fun new feature.

The Master's Market!

You'll be able to spend those Command Seals of yours on invaluable tools in the war. Perhaps even ones that'd allow one of you woefully weak Masters stand up to a Servant that'd make you their prey! But Command Seals are a valued commodity, we understand, so therefore we've decided this: Should you slay a Master, three Command Seals will be afforded to you as 'credit' which you'll be able to spend without worry.

If you've any questions, you'll find the directions and means to reach the Overseer for this War within this package.

Now, go and enjoy this War to its fullest!

Gaius Danius Griinia ChazGhost Mion SCSaya06 Lucem BearBearBear Rantos

​

 

[Gaius Danius Griinia]

Jun reached into Baggy, the trusty magic bag and looked through his assortment of tomes until he found it. It was a book on the Holy Grail War. Flipping through it quickly he got the gist of what was going on. Sure his Servant was on the bed awaiting an answer, Jun didn't care. Jun REALLY didn't like the look Saber gave him. Sure he was a fish out of water when it came to Grail Wars. However, giving him that LOOK was a surefire way to earn some dislike from Jun. Her regal bearing convinced him she must have been a man of great power and prestiege. It felt really weird thinking that sentence...

"The Holy Grail War is a battle royale between Seven Mages and their contracted Servants for a shot at the Holy Grail. Which supposedly grants wishes. You are a Servant of the Saber Class. Which has been deemed the BEST class of Servant. I should feel lucky... yet I feel as if you're looking down on me a little for not knowing whats going on. So I'm going to explain. First, I had no idea I was chosen for a Grail War. This mark appeared on my hand on a random Thursday. I came to London for answers. Secondly, you were summoned as my Servant through the use of this glass ball thing. Thirdly, despite these two random occurances, it seems we have become Master and Servant. I expect you to treat me as an equal. In a war like this, trust is paramount. If you'd rather not die along with me... we need to be able to trust one another."

Now that the serious spiel was over. Jun went back to the box and checked its contents. He found a map, a train ticket and a letter that looks to have been written on a type writter. His first thought was Someone has a typewriter in this day and age?. Then he checked the map and train ticket thoroughly. Someone wanted him and Saber at a specific place. He didn't recognize the location on the map, somewhere underground? Now onto the letter, which was short and simple. It got across the facts and while cheerfully written, had almost no frill. Jun saw that his mark, his Command Seals could compel Saber to obey. Jun tucked the idea of using them away. He'd rather use Command Seals taken from his enemies than his own. Since he had a Saber, some of the other Masters may gun for him with prizes bought using Command Seals. The entire time Jun was thinking this, he ignored Saber... which must have looked really weird since all it looked like from the outside was a lot of chin scratching and the occasional grunt. Finally he turned to his Servant with an earnest smile and said

"Well, let's go see this Overseer"

Xel

 

[SCSaya06]

Cassandra beamed upon hearing her visitor's confident declaration. "Truly--this doesn't seem like an ordinary game." She smiled as she take her visitor's hand in hers. The moment her fingers, brushed against hers, Cassandra somehow understood. There was something otherwordly about her visitor. For one, she didn't seem human. Something within her circuits told her that. It was an odd sensation; something she hadn't felt since she first started on the path of the gumshoe one rainy evening in the damp streets of Rotterdam.

"Oh yeah...the parcel." She reaches for the inconspicuous box, finding a letter, a map and a ticket packaged inside. "A note, a map and some advice huh?" Cassandra wondered as she unfolded the letter to see if it offered any insight to her current situation. It surprisingly, does.


"I think I got the gist of it. So it's essentially a deathmatch for a shot of having a wish granted huh?" Cassandra contemplates out loud, having finished reading the contents of the letter. A Master-Servant game

"Odd position. The hunter becomes the hunted. Never in my five years did I imagine placing myself in the shoes of the folk I've put behind bars, some for life even. When someone makes a proposition of this sort to you out of the blue, how would you normally react? Granted, most wishes do come true if you work hard for it but those opportunities are very few and far between. Take the case of good o'l Mr. Holt here. Even if his parents spend a lifetime praying to any God or Devil they know, he probably won't come back to life--at least, not in the way they know him. It would take a miracle to make that happen.

And it's exactly what the guy behind this letter is peddling."

"Hey...Rider? Do you have a particular wish you have in mind?" Cassandra asks the radiant warrior sharing the room with her, curious as to how her 'Servant' will respond.

Iskandar

 

[Iskandar]

Rider​

Rider helped her master up to her feet and offered a small smile, "Ah! I am Rider! I do have a true name, but for now, Rider shall suffice. In time I shall tell you my true name, but now is not that time, my Prothymos." Rider offered a small bow along with her introduction before watching as her master wandered over to the inconspicuous box. In it was a letter, a map and a ticket of some sorts. Rider wasn't all that interested in any of the things, and decided it best that her master take the reigns in terms of planning.


"Tch." Rider made a sound of disgust as her master had finished reading the note aloud. The note had infuriated Rider to no end, "My Master..." Rider said quietly with her head hung low and her fists clenched tightly, "Master... I do hope you don't adhere to this garbage." Rider's voice once again grew loud and ferocious, "The gall of these people! They seem to mock us and this war! They care for nothing more than pure entertainment and the slaughter of as many people as possible!" Rider brought her head up, staring directly at her master, "It is sickening... And..." Rider bit her lip and looked away momentarily before looking back at her master, her eyes filled with resolve, "Swear, no Promise! That you won't seek to use this... 'Master Market'. Do not be some spineless, weak willed woman who needs a handicap like that. If you do intend on using this market, then you will have to use your command seals to make me go along with such a revolting tactic."

After a few moments, Rider's anger and disgust had subsided. The servant was hoping that her master would not be tempted by some stipulation to ensure more death, "Indeed, my Prothymos, I do have a wish..." Rider offered a small smile, "I have many wishes! Though if I had to choose one... It would be to make sure you obtain the Grail. Even if you don't want it, I am rather competitive and do enjoy a good thrashing! Granted your well being and will come first!"

SCSaya06

 

[theunderwolf]

Archer opened the box and for the first time showed a small emotion in a harsh tsk sound at the letter and catalyst within, an ancient fang from a venomous snake. "Really," She muttered taking the catalyst from it and turning the snake fang in her hand, "This of all things." Annoyed she crushed the ancient bone in her hand and let the dust drop to the floor, grinding her boot in it pointedly. Next came the letter which she read quickly, somewhat thankful that the grail gave her the language skills to do so. It was interesting, and apparently a rebellion against the rules of the grail war as the grail had imparted to her. She raised an eyebrow at the last bit and handed over the letter to her master. "A weapon that could slay servants is a tempting one indeed, though I doubt any weapon could bring a magus to my level. This presents quite the opportunity though, I am an archer, so if we prioritized hunting a master of their servant we could gain a significant advantage. But that begs the question Melvin, are you one of those "woefully weak" Masters?"

 

[Xel]

SaberJun's Hotel Room​

Saber remained quite still upon the bed, her gaze firmly locked on her Master as the man rummaged through his bag and began studying a book contained within. She patiently awaited for him to find what he sought, which didn't take long as he began to describe the Grail War. Even as the man deviated and began going on a long-winded explanation of his lack of knowledge she retained her stoic expression. Although it did illuminate some things. This war clearly wasn't set up according to what she knew. Being summoned by some gem to a Master who doesn't even know what they're doing? Clearly things would play out differently than she imagined. The final statement that left her Master's mouth caused her lips to curl ever-so-slightly upwards. "Even if you might be inexperienced I can assure you that only those worthy shall have me at their side... Even if my summoning was slightly unique Fate would not disgrace me as to make me subservient to one who could not carry their own weight."

With that she hopped off the bed, standing before the man once again. "I trust you as my Master and I shall ensure we obtain the Grail no matter the challenges we face." While there was a small part of her that realized all her praise may have been completely off the mark there was no way she would accept someone of her standing being given to an unfit Master. Her pride would simply not allow such a thing. So true or not it was largely irrelevant, if she deemed this man fit to be her Master than it would be so. Her gaze followed after the man as he made his way back to the box to fish out the remaining contents, several pieces of paper by the looks of it. Curious she followed after him, pushing up beside him in order to read the letter held in his grasp.

"Oho~ Interesting. This truly is a different war than I had expected. We would have to see what this Market contains as it is likely not worth giving up your own seals for... But the seals of enemy Master's are another story." Even as she spoke the man ignored her, just staring at the letter as he rubbed his chin and let out the odd thoughtful grunt. Her eyes narrowed slightly at being ignored but before she could do anything he suddenly turned to her and proclaimed they should visit the overseer. She folded her arms under her chest and gave a simple nod. "I suppose it would be best to familiarize ourselves with this war. There are things even I do not understand, and being left in the dark is not a hobby of mine." With those words her form dissipated into particles of light that seemed to blow away in a non-existent breeze. Her voice echoed through her Master's mind once she was gone, carrying an ethereal echo to it. "Then let us depart, Master."

Gaius Danius Griinia

 

[SCSaya06]

"Hmm..." Cassandra thought for a while at Rider's offer to bring her the Grail. "I'm not sure I have a wish I'd be willing to go so far as to kill somebody for..." She wondered, her head lost in thought. "Even if I did, just the disposing of damning evidence and traces is a monumental task in itself...not to mention I can potentially get hired to investigate the deaths of the people I end up killing."

"For now, why don't we go see this 'Overseer' guy? Or gal. Or--whatever they are. Let's play it by ear for a while Rider. With such high stakes, I bet it won't take too long for a pair to attempt an attack on us. Might as well get ahead of the rest." Her attention now turns to Rider, giving her a good look from head to toe. Going by her height, it was clear who held the more imposing stature between them. Which means...

"Nothing I have will fit." Cassandra murmurs to herself, twirling a strand of her hair hanging from the side. "Mind if we make a small stop though? I don't think I have any clothes that will fit you at hand right now."


"One thing about investigating deceased people is that almost everything about them are laid bare. You don't get the sense of bias; the things the interviewee eliminates about themselves whenever they talk about themselves. Their dirty laundry hanging out in the open without anybody to tuck it away. Same thing with Mr. Holt over here. Upper-class, middle-aged man with heavy responsibilities and an overbearing family. Hectic lifestyle he leads surely causes him some...well, frustration.

Landlord's been seeing a lady coming in the past few weeks. Tall lady. Always headed up to Mr. Holt's room. Always in the dead of night. Always left in the wee hours of the morning. Doesn't take a genius to put two and two together. Wonder how his family will react if they found out?

Which is why, we find ourselves walking up to his doorstep again."

The walk to Hyde Park was quite refreshing. There weren't a lot of people around so she didn't have to worry about Rider's appearance causing a stir. "Wouldn't want to tell the family that I'll be looting their son's dresser for some woman's clothes I found mixed in with his laundry. I suppose they'll find out eventually though. Won't matter too much if I find the guy who did him in."

Off the path however, Cassandra espied an odd-looking pair quite like themselves, just near the park bench. A sensation in her recently marked hand flared up, probably as a warning or reminder of sorts. She had a theory on who they could be but decides to make sure just the same.

"Hey...do you know these folks Rider?" She asked.

Iskandar Rantos Girouette

 

[Iskandar]

Rider​

"A fair answer, my Prothymos!" Rider said at her masters answer of not knowing what to wish for, especially if she had to kill for it, "Indeed! I like that answer. Taking ones life is no easy feat. Unless you've bathed in war your entire life like me. Then it becomes simple." Rider heaved a sigh and shrugged, "Doesn't mean I like it though. It is sadly a necessary thing we must do in this War." After Rider finished rambling she offered her master that toothy smile of hers before tilting her head at Cassandra's next course of action.

"I suppose we should... If it is necessary." Rider replied with a sullen tone at her master's plan. Rider didn't want to meet this Overseer at all, as it would probably be hard for Rider to contain herself from killing the poor sod, "And do not worry, my Prothymos. Should we be attacked, I shall defeat our foes. Indeed, no one shall touch my beautiful Queen." Rider smiled once more, seeming to brighten up slightly when speaking to her Master.

Rider peered curiously at her master as she was looked up and down from head to toe. The servant tilted her head at her master, wondering why she was being cross examined so thoroughly before speaking, "I do not mind, my Prothymos. And... clothes?" Rider looked down at her attire, realizing that she was in her armor. A devious and playful grin was momentarily on Rider's face, "What a considerate Prothymos you are. Thinking of my attire. Indeed! It would be quite odd to be walking around London like this."


Rider closely followed behind her master as the two made their way through Hyde Park. The walk was rather quiet only filled with the sounds of nature, as Rider remained silent but stared at her master, who seemed deep in thought. Luckily it was early, and no one was really around to see Rider walking around in a full suit of armor. It would probably cause Rider's Master a great deal of embarrassment and stress if people were around gawking at Rider's radiance.

"Prothymos..." Rider finally spoke up, her lips curling mischievously as her body was now clad in normal, modern clothes rather than her ornate armor. Well, normal wouldn't be quite right, as her modern clothes were still somewhat extreme. Rider was about to speak once more, most likely just to fill the silence between Rider and her master, but instead her master spoke. Asking a simple question which caused Rider's attention to slowly drift over to the two people near a park bench and look at them behind her aviators(part of her everyday attire, a simple way to cover up her missing eye.). One of the two people was covered in a tacky spandex suit, causing Rider to almost burst out in laughter at the sight of it. Her want for laughter soon subsided and she leaned into her master, wrapping her arms around her master's, "I do indeed. The one in spandex is a Servant. I would assume the other is her master... Soon enough they'll realize us too." Rider's voice was low and spoken gently into the ear of her master as Rider's hands cupped that of her master's hand, feeling the command seals.

Spoiler: Rider's Everyday Attire

SCSaya06 Rantos Girouette

 

[ChazGhost]

Melvin looked curiously as Archer crushed what seemed to be an ancient fang of snake. ...I'll have to ask her a few questions about that later.... Melvin thought before looking over the train ticket and map before Archer handed him the note. Melvin was an expert on the grail wars but he never heard a war that started with a type writer written messages. "Well today seems to be getting stranger and interesting..." Melvin said before reading the note. "The master's market will be interesting to see and use." Melvin said after reading the note. "To answer your question my dear Archer, if you mean taking out the master from a distance and avoid unneeded fights with servants, then yes I'm "woefully weak". But while you may view it as weak I view it as a fair strategy" Melvin said putting the note down. "You see Archer I have learned the best option to win is to hit the opponent were they are weak and for now the most obvious weak point of every team is the master" Melvin said with smirk growing on his face.

"But we can worry about how we take care of competition later. For now though we should see the overseer of this war and a get some answers on few important items..." Melvin said before looking over archer. "Before we leave though it may be a good idea to get you a more... normal set of clothes to wear as to not draw unneeded attention." Melvin said before heading to the hotels phone. "I can get the hotel to bring up something quick for you." Melvin said before making the call...
theunderwolf

 

[Gaius Danius Griinia]

Jun looked outside the window of his hotel room. It was still quite dark, perfect for what he was about to do. Jun then slung Baggy over his shoulder and locked his door. Walking down to the lobby, he asked Saber to keep an eye on their surroundings. The war had started and he had to be ready at all times. Grabbing a coffee from a little place open at this hour. Jun walked into a secluded alley. Pulling his hood over his face and looking around for people, Jun went up. Having a good grasp of Wind Magecraft allowed one to do a great many things. Jun used it to fly... well okay it technically WASN'T flying. He just kinda pushed himself through the air. However, it did make getting around easier. The lingering darkness ensured that if Jun was in just the right spot, he was unseen. Riding the wind, Jun gently glided along to his destination. Taking the time to make some casual conversation with Saber.

"So Saber, what's your wish? I want to change the world"

It was a simple description of his wish, but a pretty good one. Jun saw how corrupted and conceited mages could be. Their power and prestiege could go to their heads. Get enough of them in a group, thats trouble. Allow them to make rules and decisions in your governmental system, thats a tragedy. It allowed people like the mages who killed his parents to destroy things they didn't like. Jun originally wanted to get rid of them so only GOOD mages remained. His time as a killer of magic users taught him ALL mages had a great chance of developing screwed morals. So his wish was to become strong enough to even things out a little. However small his actions may be, he wanted to send ripples that would change the world. Landing near the location described, Jun told Saber to be weary and if anything goes wrong

"Kill everything that isn't me"

Xel

 

[simj26]

Lancer
The light that emanated from the orb burst into a coiling tower of flames. The sheer heat from it more than implied that if its beholder had still been chewing on it when it did so, she would have been torched alive. As if it were but wind, a hand pierced through the flames, and with a sweep, cast the fire apart. The last leaves of fire flitted in the dying wind, before they, too, faded out of existence. A woman with a head of full, lush, blonde hair stood in the place of the orb, adjusting her gauntlet that had cut through the flames as if it were but paper. With a discerning eye, she glanced about the room, took in the empty magnificence, then, throwing her scarf, just as full as her hair was, behind her, and bent down beside her fallen Master, observing every single feature of her Master. She did not speak, letting her eyes scan over her features.

One hand reached forwards, and lifted the black hair in its palm, and the warrior leaned forwards, until her face was close enough to breathe in the scent of her Master. Seemingly content, she withdrew, and crouched down beside her Master. The softest of smiles played on her lips, and she extended the same hand towards her Master, indicating that she should take it. She was not like him, but she was good enough. She had someone to serve, at the very least.

“Lancer. It’s nice to meet you.”
Mion