Everything that's wrong with your favorite videogame

[XiaoWeiXiao]

Title. You can also target your fanbase, the devs, or any aspect related to the game. I'll start;


League of Legends


= You can set fire to a flame spirit and it'll damage them.


= You can petrify a rock giant.


= You can blind a blind guy.


= You can equip a mermaid with boots.


= Nearly every single woman in this game has them double Ds. (ain't complainin' though hue)


= Booby plates to show them double Ds even in armour.


= Lore doesn't exist, so people fight in the arena just cause.


= Balancing is meh at best, and really, really gamebreaking at worst.


= E-$port$

 

[Gladius]

I'll pick one of mine.


Breath of Fire 3:


- In the desert area, the directions the game gives you for bonus rewards are actually wrong, and there is no way of knowing this


- Peco takes the entire game to actually be on the same level as the rest of your party


- The dialogue is a bit flaky (though nowhere near as bad as Breath of Fire 2's awful translation, as much as I love that game)


- In the last dungeon you suddenly have to level-grind all of a sudden for about 10 levels, even though this was never really needed before


- I found the immunisations shop literally useless unless you do quite a bit of extra preparation


- I WANT TEEPO BACK


- Ryu's dream in the beginning of the game is foreshadowing something right at the end of the game...but it takes so long to get to that point, that by the time you get there you've forgotten all about it. I only ever realised it by replaying the game almost immediately afterwards


- The boiler puzzle in the lighthouse. If you waste too much chrysm in failing the puzzle, the game forces you to go back to town and buy some more. No way round it


- That subquest where the only possible way of proceeding is by making a very specific meal for the leader of a village. (I always got this completely correct each time, but if you didn't know how to do it perfectly then it would be really difficult)


- Getting rare fish in general. I've wasted hours on that fishing mini-game and never quite got the hang of it


- The desert. Just because


- Emitai's sob story. The first few times I played through this game, I was legitimately upset that you were forced to beat him and that his daughter was going to die slowly from her illness. Read the walkthrough and WHAT. Also, there's no way of knowing this if you don't talk to them after the match!


- Seven minute unskippable cutscene just before the final boss


- Did I mention Teepo? Well, I want him back. He was one of the best things that ever happened to my party set-up, and the game took him away from me. It's a harsh, cruel, dragon-filled world out there.

 

[My Pet Poro]

Kingdom Hearts:


- No real multiplayer system


- The system they did create for multiplayer was god awful (even though BBS was great)


- DARKNESS


- A fairly repetitive story line


- DARKNESS


- First game was claimed to be 'too hard' so they made the second one too easy


- everything about KH: Coded


- This list goes on forever

 

[IDK90]

I guess i'll go


TF2 (Team Fortress 2)


-With one balance, comes another broken mechanic


-I don't think (and other people too) valve has actually ever played the game


-it was "cs:go'd"


-rare hats from community updates look ok or bad

 

[Urban Panini]

Suikoden


-Konami literally doesn't care about it...at all.


-A slow start. I'm not talking like an hour. I'm talking like seven hours. Here's looking at you, V.


-Last main installment went back in the timeline, so a lot of plots have never been tied up.


-Konami killed the Suikoden team and VI is basically never going to exist. Ever.


-The last game released had nothing to do with any of the previous games ever.


-I HATE YOU, KONAMI

 

[RibRipper]

Dota 2


- You can use fire against a ember Chinese dude and it will hurt him


- Medusa can stoneify a rock person


- Medusa and a fish person can wear boots


-If you're playing in Europe, Russians. Russians everywhere


-If you're playing in the USA, Peruvians. Peruvians everywhere


-It has been years, and Riki STILL is auto-banned in captain's mode


-Techies


-Silencer


-Techies and Silencer


-Dota 2's planet is having an oxegon problem because heroes keep eating trees to regain health


-Sniper's laugh causes cancer


-Sven's laugh cures cancer


-My imaginary girlfriend left me because of Dota 2

 

[XiaoWeiXiao]

Dota 2
- You can use fire against a ember Chinese dude and it will hurt him


- Medusa can stoneify a rock person


- Medusa and a fish person can wear boots


-If you're playing in Europe, Russians. Russians everywhere


-If you're playing in the USA, Peruvians. Peruvians everywhere


-It has been years, and Riki STILL is auto-banned in captain's mode


-Techies


-Silencer


-Techies and Silencer


-Dota 2's planet is having an oxegon problem because heroes keep eating trees to regain health


-Sniper's laugh causes cancer


-Sven's laugh cures cancer


-My imaginary girlfriend left me because of Dota 2

At least you guys have arcade mode (Overthrow fun AF), unlike us ;-; .

 

[RibRipper]

At least you guys have arcade mode (Overthrow fun AF), unlike us ;-; .

There is no shame in joining both Dota and LoL, both of them are free after all. I'm contemplating on giving LoL a shot some time. Mix it up a bit.

 

[XiaoWeiXiao]

There is no shame in joining both Dota and LoL, both of them are free after all. I'm contemplating on giving LoL a shot some time. Mix it up a bit.

The amount of items in DotA2 is really overwhelming to the average League gamer. Along with the fact that the Heroes have turnrates, other additional mechanics and such, it feels like a different ball game. I have to say though, getting fed as a carry in DotA2 is way more satisfying than in League, you're literally unkillable whilst dishing out the damage ( I rarely do get fed though, i'm only like, level 3 on my acc), so I'll probably invest some more time on Dota right after I finish my placements in LoL.

 

[RibRipper]

You're right about the items. It took me 800 hours to memorize them all. The lack of the ability to deny and being more forgiving to mistakes might be a bit frustrating for me if I try out LoL. I'm guna give it a shot, though.

 

[Dutchmann]

Darkest Dungeon


-It's really, really, really fair when it comes to RNG

 

[Hercynia]

Oooooh boy.


Warframe!


- RNG Drop Rates


- Lack of some weapons being balanced at all


- Massive pay to win aspect


- Trading is not encouraged early game


- You can get huge amounts of free platinum trading syndicate mods


- Bow visual glitching


- Unairu is useless and unbalanced as a Focus


- Viver


- "Press 4-to-win" warframes


- RNG Drop Rates (Looking at you, Ivara parts and Limbo Theorem)


- It says "checking for updates" while downloading updates


- Caps lock minimizes the game


- Switching window has a chance to break the game


- High-level stealth play is nigh impossible without a stealth frame, and there are about 12 silent weapons out of 180 or so


- Corrosive Projection is used too much at end-game


-Lack of explanation about Orbiter/Liset (does one deploy and one stay in orbit...?)


- RNG Prime Rewards


- Some parts of the same frame are far more common than others


- Equinox requires you to farm Tyl Regor at least 8 times


- Mutalist Alad V Nav Co-ordinate is too difficult to come by


- Not enough people like Arch-Wing or Sharch-Wing Missions


- Uranus puns


- Interception is unpopular


- "Host not found" bug.


- Conclave is RIDICULOUSLY unbalanced.


- "There's a large force up ahead. It's the Grineer." It's been the Grineer this WHOLE MISSION, I'm so surprised. I expected the Corpus!


I'm sure there's other stuff, but that's what I can think of off the top of my head. I do enjoy the game (the movement is excellent), but it can get frustrating.

 

[TeaMMatE11]

World of Tanks:


-imbalanced Matchmaker


-Russian bias on tanks (not really)


-RNG


-Crap community (seriously.)


-Arcady-like (which is what I like)


-Artillery OP


-blueprint/prototype tanks are in the game (never saw war)

 

[Airagog]

Dark souls 1 2 and 3


-back stabs. Too easy or too hard.


-fucking spin to win.


-hitboxes.


-pvp unbalanced as hell


-seriously, fucking BKH spin to win.


-HITBOXES. THAT DID NOT HIT ME.


-fuck you havel you god damn piece of shit. Burn in hell.


-you too smough.


+orestein is cool tho.

 

[Obi-Wan Kenobi]

Batman Arkham City


Spoilers ahead

Spoiler

-Okay, a prison where you throw all the criminals inside and just expect it to go well? Sure. Nothing could go wrong with that. Gotham, go fund that shit.


-At the start of the game, when Bruce Wayne gets kidnapped. Tear gas gets deployed, okay. People move in, okay. People are not wearing any kind of protection from tear gas. Whut?


-Protocol 10. You gather all the criminals into one spot, then basically wipe them out. At what point is capturing Batman, then leaving him alive a crucial part of this? Surely just straight-up capping the dude when he's tied to a chair would be infinitely better.


-I get that armour is a thing, sure. But Batman can straight-up take a shotgun to the face and be fine. So can Catwoman.


-Some of the weirdest invisible walls I've seen in a game, sometimes.


-Riddler. Literally the least effective villain ever.


-I know that it's part of her character, but Catwoman's so aggressively sexy that it's annoying. Like, that's almost her entire purpose in the game, except for saving Batman from rubble. And honestly, she was doing barely any of that lifting, anyway, so Batman should have been fine. She even crawls in a way that gives a view of her ass, almost every time. And she slides in a way that shows the camera her cleavage. It gets annoying.


-Constant reminders of Protocol 10, in case you developed sudden amnesia.


-One of the thug voices sounds basically identical to Aaron Cash. Because nothing keeps you immersed like suddenly having Aaron Cash be an undercover member of Joker's gang while simultaneously being held hostage by riddler.


-The ridiculous hubris of literally every thug in the game. Batman's tearing through the compound, and every second thug's talking about what he's going to do after killing Batman. Although that could be funny, and sometimes is.


-Does not once include the phrase 'I'm Batman'.


-Ground takedowns sometimes having you punch someone in the ass so hard they go unconscious.


-Thugs have awful peripheral vision. And they're deaf. Noisy grapple gun can't be heard at all.


-It is physically impossible for a man, no matter how Batman he is, to lift people up by the throat with one hand. The world record for the appropriate thing, one armed bicep curling, is 61 kg. And was done by someone entirely more muscular than Batman. Batman does this repeatedly throughout the game with seemingly no exertion.


-Explosive gel. It can go off in your face, break the wall into debris, KO thugs on the other side, knock down thugs on your side, and Batman's reaction to it is the equivalent of a light shrug.


-Solomon Grundy. That fight should have lasted longer.


-'It looks like a sword fits here'. Ninja obligingly shows up and lets Batman shove her sword into the slot.


-Ra'as Al Ghul gets Jesus imagery. For some fucking reason.


-Hugo Strange's ego.


-Encryption chips always fit in the Cryptographic Sequencer. Always.


-The Demon Trials. What the fuck.


-Corner Cover. And generally the cover you can hide behind. You can basically hide a railing. That's almost entirely not covering your body.


-The way people slow down from falls. Batman and Robin use their capes to swoosh out and somehow act as a parachute. Catwoman and (I think) Nightwing just land. On the ground. From the top of a clock tower. And they're fine.


-I could go on for a while about this. For any game. I'll spare you and just stop here.

 

[GenericHenchman]

Jade Empire:


-Weapon Styles cost focus. Okay, do they do more damage? No? Okay. Oh, you're saying they *ALSO* can't hurt certain enemies? Okay, what good are they? I like my staff, but you're telling me I can rarely use it-and when I do it won't really be much better than if I used my fists? You sir, are a jerk. *Goes back to using staff anyway.*


-Sword Style is literally the deadliest there is, and it's nigh-impossible to dodge in time if you're in range. Vs. Staff, you can sidestep. Sword is like *Whoosh* Ouch! *Whoosh* and half my health is gone.


-The most fun martial styles don't come around until really late game where it's like...well great, I got to enjoy that style for all five fights after I got it. Thanks.


-Closed Fist options are just. . .way too mustache-twirly-evil.

 

[XiaoWeiXiao]

Batman Arkham City
Spoilers ahead

Spoiler

-Okay, a prison where you throw all the criminals inside and just expect it to go well? Sure. Nothing could go wrong with that. Gotham, go fund that shit.


-At the start of the game, when Bruce Wayne gets kidnapped. Tear gas gets deployed, okay. People move in, okay. People are not wearing any kind of protection from tear gas. Whut?


-Protocol 10. You gather all the criminals into one spot, then basically wipe them out. At what point is capturing Batman, then leaving him alive a crucial part of this? Surely just straight-up capping the dude when he's tied to a chair would be infinitely better.


-I get that armour is a thing, sure. But Batman can straight-up take a shotgun to the face and be fine. So can Catwoman.


-Some of the weirdest invisible walls I've seen in a game, sometimes.


-Riddler. Literally the least effective villain ever.


-I know that it's part of her character, but Catwoman's so aggressively sexy that it's annoying. Like, that's almost her entire purpose in the game, except for saving Batman from rubble. And honestly, she was doing barely any of that lifting, anyway, so Batman should have been fine. She even crawls in a way that gives a view of her ass, almost every time. And she slides in a way that shows the camera her cleavage. It gets annoying.


-Constant reminders of Protocol 10, in case you developed sudden amnesia.


-One of the thug voices sounds basically identical to Aaron Cash. Because nothing keeps you immersed like suddenly having Aaron Cash be an undercover member of Joker's gang while simultaneously being held hostage by riddler.


-The ridiculous hubris of literally every thug in the game. Batman's tearing through the compound, and every second thug's talking about what he's going to do after killing Batman. Although that could be funny, and sometimes is.


-Does not once include the phrase 'I'm Batman'.


-Ground takedowns sometimes having you punch someone in the ass so hard they go unconscious.


-Thugs have awful peripheral vision. And they're deaf. Noisy grapple gun can't be heard at all.


-It is physically impossible for a man, no matter how Batman he is, to lift people up by the throat with one hand. The world record for the appropriate thing, one armed bicep curling, is 61 kg. And was done by someone entirely more muscular than Batman. Batman does this repeatedly throughout the game with seemingly no exertion.


-Explosive gel. It can go off in your face, break the wall into debris, KO thugs on the other side, knock down thugs on your side, and Batman's reaction to it is the equivalent of a light shrug.


-Solomon Grundy. That fight should have lasted longer.


-'It looks like a sword fits here'. Ninja obligingly shows up and lets Batman shove her sword into the slot.


-Ra'as Al Ghul gets Jesus imagery. For some fucking reason.


-Hugo Strange's ego.


-Encryption chips always fit in the Cryptographic Sequencer. Always.


-The Demon Trials. What the fuck.


-Corner Cover. And generally the cover you can hide behind. You can basically hide a railing. That's almost entirely not covering your body.


-The way people slow down from falls. Batman and Robin use their capes to swoosh out and somehow act as a parachute. Catwoman and (I think) Nightwing just land. On the ground. From the top of a clock tower. And they're fine.


-I could go on for a while about this. For any game. I'll spare you and just stop here.


Well, he (Batman) did support the weight of a ceiling that weighed about half a ton in the comics. Besides, you can never be too Batman.

 

[Obi-Wan Kenobi]

Well, he (Batman) did support the weight of a ceiling that weighed about half a ton in the comics. Besides, you can never be too Batman.

Comics Batman is insane. At one point I believe I remember him breaking a tree trunk with a kick.

 

[XiaoWeiXiao]

batmanfeats.blogspot.com/p/powerstrength.html?m=1


Here's an interesting list displaying Batman's impressive (and impossible) strength. I mean, he challenged Superman cause he wanted to show the capabilities of humans (I think) but the stuff he does is something no regular human can do.

 

[ghost of past]

My turn.


Lego Marvels' The Avengers:


-The game feels really short


-too much money in the levels (Which is waaaay to O.P. to farm in)


-The main BIG place to go to is New York. I want a really good sized Malibu, Washington D.C., and Slovokia.


WRC5:


-The game bugs out with the crashes sometimes


-When I hit a bump, the rear door flies up.


-The cars go down through the map a tiny bit after a big jump.

 

[ghost of past]

Du

Dark souls 1 2 and 3
-back stabs. Too easy or too hard.


-fucking spin to win.


-hitboxes.


-pvp unbalanced as hell


-seriously, fucking BKH spin to win.


-HITBOXES. THAT DID NOT HIT ME.


-fuck you havel you god damn piece of shit. Burn in hell.


-you too smough.


+orestein is cool tho.

de, it's Dark Souls. They wanted all that. They put all of that unbalance and problems for a high difficulty in-game.

 

[ghost of past]

Let me add something in Dragon age:Inquistion too. Flying horse. I look back at my horse, it gets hit by enemies, and suddenly it starts flying and flipping upwards. They should've fixed that.

 

[Kritikal]

UNDERTALE.


--- You cannot have a date with the fish.


-- Pafriskus.


Counter-Strike: Global Offensive.





- Aim at the ground = Headshots.


- A professional with a P90 in their hands equals to hell itself.


- AWP IS ONE SHOT KILL C'MON


Team Fortress 2.


--- If I wanted to watch porn photos, I'll go to Imagefap or something.


- Just like CS:GO, a professional that mains Sniper equals to terrible nightmares.


- Scout is supposed to be frail, not one of the best clases.





And the folks above did a nice job describing my same frustration with Dark Souls.

 

[HK Fifty]

SPOILERS AHEAD. THESE GAMES ARE VERY OLD (RC - 2005 , KOTOR1 - 2003) , BUT BE WARNED.


KOTOR :


=story is very simplistic. By this I mean it's a typical 'save the Galaxy as a paragon of light!' Or 'conquer it as a baby-flesh eating Evil-Doer!'. Only Jolee , Canderous and HK-47 have any sort of non-standard character type (and you can argue against that as well) , and despite HK-47 seeming to hate everyone they all get along. Also , Malak is over the top stupidly evil , leaving no room for sympathy for the fact that he's kind of you if you didn't get 'rescued' by Bastila before the start of the game


=it's very , very easy and the combat is boringly clicking 'flurry' or 'rapid shot' over and over. It doesn't matter what weapon you pick much (unless it's ranged , then two pistols or the baragwin repeaters from Suvam Tan). Honestly light sabers are the only truly 'viable' option.


=there's no 'neutral' endings , no matter how hard you try to stay neutral. You can't get treated as neutral either - you're either ultra paragon good or demonically evil. And even if you agree and enjoy jolee's advice and parables , you can pick no option but 'strong headed 25~ year old doesn't give a damn or understand what this old guy says'. Ditto HK-47 - you can only be annoyed by him as well , even as a Dark Sider. Also you get the Light Side robes on the Star Forge , which you can't actually use as you can't gain enough points for either side by the point you get them.


=the Light Side ending is just ANH's ending with 'you work for an actual government' pizzazz.


=and most of all , there's no options that reflect you being anything but a newborn frickin baby that knows nothing in any of the dialogue options. The Jedi have you a NEW identity , not just removed the old one. The Female character does a better job of expressing this , but it still doesn't feel right. You basically have to fan-fiction in some more knowledgable responses.


Republic Commando


=the squad fails to come across as a group of brothers (except scorch and Sev's dialogue). They refer to each other by numbers 80% of the time (I guess for Fixer it makes sense , but Boss isn't as uptight , is he?). Also they say several things that make it seem like they don't care about Boss (such as asking for a replacement exasperatedly if you get incapacitated or get lost from them) , leading to my personal impression that he was actually introduced to them later , and that the leader they grew up with died. Of course the end of the game fixes this by them caring about sev being lost so much , and the books make them seem more like 'professionals' that have never lost a man and don't understand the reality of these sort of jokes , so this could be argued against easily.


=the portions of this game that make you go alone. This makes it feel more like Halo , and while I like this more than Halo I'd rather have the squad with me to really get the 'republic commando squad'-ness of it. Another personal opinion of course , easily disputable.


=the beginning crawl of the Kashyyk portion says 'the implication of an alliance between the factions (Trandoshans and Seperatists) Is disturbing'. Wait , didn't we already know this from the Prosecutor level , where the trando's were hijacking an assault ship to give to the seps , in exchange for supplies (such as battle droids)? And why do we have to escort tarrful TWICE , and lead the infantry assault? We're commandos , not infantry , so why can't we assisst the infantry AFTER we save sev? Of course this can be explained by Yoda needing you ASAP , or that he's not the best tactician , but I would think someone as old and wise as Yoda would make an excellent strategist. Minor story issues really.


=the lack of a level for kamino training is a bit sad , I would love to see how hard the training was instead of just hearing the load screens say it was. Hardly a marr on the game of course.


I see KOTOR was much more errors in my opinion than RC , but ironically I like KOTOR more than RC. I didn't do TSL even though I like it with the RCM added more than K1 , because it just has so many issues that it would be at least as many as K1 and RC did put together.

 

[Captifate]

Dying Light


- running around at the speed of sound got places to go


- Seriously. The maps are too big.


- In the DLC, there's a timed mission that more or less requires your buggy. If you fail, you restart at the beginning of the course. Without getting the fuel you consumed back. (I grapple hooked my way to freedom.)


- The main storyline is riddled with cliches and the sidequests should have been the main focus, dang