Realistic or Modern Dearly Beloved

[secondhandSARAnade]

 

[secondhandSARAnade]

Sunday - two days after Cassie was pronounced deceased. Spring. Today's forecast is sunny. Ironically, not a cloud is in sight. The meeting place is "the spot" - a park gazebo not far from their high school. They agreed to be there by 1 P.M. Spoiler

 

[haydenly16]

Cody sighed. This was the fourth time she had gone through her collection of CDs. She didn't want to listen to this music anymore, so with an angry sigh, she punched the button of her radio and inside car was silent, just the hum of the engine. Cody was tired of staring at the highway. 16 hours in a car by yourself was never a good idea, especially since Cody hadn't slept at all last night. Suddenly, her big chocolate lab in her back seat snored loudly, scaring Cody enough to yelp a little bit. This obviously woke the lab, sending him into a tizzy trying to get to her to see why she yelped. "Gunner," Cody sighed, reaching back to subdue him. "I'm fine." She eased the dog back down onto the seat and he immediately fell back asleep. Cody's eyes were slowly closing, and she finally had to jerk her head back up. "We have to stop," she murmured to herself, looking for the closest exit.


Cody climbed back into her car, shoving Gunner's upper body back into the back seat. She pulled apart a hamburger from some fast food restaurant and gave half of it to him. She was going to eat the other half, but she felt sick just looking at it. She hadn't eaten since Saturday morning, even though both Matty and her other roommate, Thomas, had begged her to. She just couldn't stomach any type of solid at this point. Eventually, she gave up on trying to eat it and gave the other half to Gunner as well, which he happily accepted in one bite. She pet his head gently and took a long sip of her drink, she obviously had to get a drink. Gunner laid back down in the back seat and Cody sighed again as they finally crossed the state line into her home state. The drive home was rough, she usually just flew when she went home for vacation. This isn't a vacation, she reminded herself harshly. She was right. This wasn't a vacation. This was an invitation for her to remember where she came from and why sometimes, you have to go back.


"Cody-kins," she mother met her in the driveway. Cody could tell that her mother had been crying. Of course she had been crying, her mother was a crier. "Hey Mom," Cody murmured, getting out of the car. Her mother instantly wrapped her in a tight hug. Cody was almost four inches taller than her mother, so her mother placed her face in the crook of her neck and began to cry. The front door opened and Cody looked up. Her father stood there. Cody looked over her mother's shoulder, their arms wrapped around each other, and stared at her father mournfully. Her military father stared back at her sadly. Cody had always been a daddy's girl and she always would be, she knew that. His hair had grayed a little since she'd seen him last, but he still looked just like her daddy, like he always would. He was her hero. The man that taught her to shoot a gun and to stand up for herself. The man that told her she could fly and then let her. The man that would mean more to her than any other man ever would. Now, wait, don't get her wrong, Cody would kill and die for her mom and she loved her very much. But her dad was her daddy.


Cody's mom let her go after she cried for a few minutes and stepped back. She grabbed Cody's duffle bag from the ground and then complained how heavy it was through a tear stained face. Cody chuckled at her mom's remark and then turned back to her dad. Her dad's face was stoic as he opened his arms toward her. Cody walked forward quickly and fell into her dad, tears not being able to be held back any more. Cody had held them back for her mom, she knew they would only made her cry more. But her dad didn't cry, he just hugged her and smoothed her hair down. But he didn't say anything, which was always nice. Cody's mom never did that. Cody finally began to back away from her father's embrace and he let her, kissing the top of her head, since he was several inches taller than her. He gave Cody a pitiful half smile and Cody took several deep, shakey breaths. "You're home, baby," he murmured, reaching over to kiss the top of her head again. He reached for her book bag, loaded down with note cards, papers, books, and her laptop and he made a face at her. "You're going to ruin your back," he tsked and then walked up the pathway to their house.


Cody turned around to get Gunner from her backseat. There leaning up against her car was her 28-year-old brother, Colton, with Gunner at his side. Cody tried to smile at him, but couldn't. "Colt," she said, the word catching in her throat. Her gorgeous big brother gave her a sad smile and pulled her in for a hug. "What are you doing here?" she asked, clearing her throat, into the fabric of his shirt. "Did you think I'd miss this?" he asked, letting her go and looking at her sorrowfully. "Did you bring Jax and Jenny?" she asked about her brother's twin 2-year-olds, Jaxson and Jennifer. Her sister-in-law had insisted on same letter first names, because that's how Colton and Cody's names ended up. Colt shook his head. "Rachel couldn't come," he answered, "I'm sorry." Cody laughed. "Sorry for what? I'll just come see them over the summer," Cody said with a smile. Colt hesitated. "Code," he whispered softly. "Oh," Cody said, the gloom returning. "Please..." she couldn't get the words out, "Please... Please, don't." She finally got out, swallowing hard as she looked at Colt. All Cody could think about now was meeting her friends later in the usual spot. He nodded slowly, threw an arm around her shoulders, and they both walked toward the front door. Into the house that was haunted with the ghosts of high school.

 

[Poe]

She had already been to see Cassie’s parents and she had already been to the hospital, the morgue not nearly as dark as movies made them out to be. In fact, it was rather bright and the medical examiner that had pulled the sheet back on the body was humming some tune Ali knew she had heard before but couldn’t quite put her finger on. That was Cassie, without a doubt, eyes closed and skin pale. That was her and though she thought seeing the body would bring her closure, it only made her sick. Soldiering on, she had spent the better part of that morning holding Cassie's mother as she cried about the light her daughter brought into the world and Ali could not bring herself to disagree. She’d spent the rest of the morning at home in her bathroom, tears running down her face as her stomach emptied every trace of what she had seen today. When her father had died, the casket was closed. She had overheard her mother say something about how it was too gruesome and that it didn’t even look like Ali’s father anymore.


But even though Cassie looked untouched, it still wasn’t her anymore.


Once she’d cleaned herself up and showered, Ali helped her mother into a bath and made some breakfast for her. Ali couldn’t stomach much, but she’d managed to hold back her disgust to scramble her mother some eggs and brown some toast. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to hold her over until Ali could manage something more substantial. With a quick kiss to her temple, Ali was out the door and made her way towards the park right by their old high school. It was early and she knew no one would be there yet, as they were all taking time off from their busy lives to come home, but she needed to breath that air. Ali needed to be somewhere that didn’t feel like she was moving through molasses.


She had a small notebook tucked in her back pocket, just in case, though she doubted she would be able to do any writing today. It just didn’t feel right, nothing felt right anymore, and she couldn’t for the life of her figure it out. She thought that maybe losing her father would prepare her for this, but death never felt the same twice. Last time, the effects had been immediate and Ali was hysterical, so broken to the point that she’d nearly lost everyone else in her grief, but this time it was slower. More painful and agonizing. There was no one to be mad at this time, there were just bad conditions that day and she lost control of the car. No blame, no closure, just an unfortunate and heartbreaking work of fate. That, Ali decided, hurt more than anything — the feeling that you couldn’t have changed a damn thing even if you managed to stop the world from turning.


Ali had wanted to talk to her mom about it but she couldn’t bring herself to break the news. Not until Cassie’s mother drop Ali off at the house did she see any semblance of reaction in her mother’s eyes. Once she had left, Ali had heard her mother mutter, “oh, that poor thing,” but then turned back to the television. She even wondered if her mother had the heart to mourn anymore or if she had mourned so much that there was no room left in her heart for anything or anyone else. There sure as hell wasn’t room for Ali in there, that was for sure.


The gazebo was abandoned when she finally got there, her hand running over the aging wood and smiling at the things they’d managed to carve into the inside. Hearts with their initials, little inside jokes, an inappropriate drawing or two — they were all here. Moments frozen in time from when they were together and Cassie was still there. Now it felt empty, as her railing, where she usually propped herself up and played guitar, was barren. All that was left was the small drawing of a guitar pick and her initials inside. There was so much she was going to do with her life, so much more than Ali was, and it had all been taken away in the blink of an eye.


Ali pulled out her notebook, the pen she always had tucked somewhere in her hair was in hand and she hesitated for a moment as though the ink would immortalize what had happened. With a shaky breath, she sat down in Cassie’s spot, back against the very railing she’d perch on, and scribbled down a few words.


They say some animals can live without limbs, but I cannot help but wonder if there are any in this world that can live without a beating heart.


They had lost their heart.

 

[JujuBee]

Quick steps echoed throughout the empty restaurant. Marcellus Westernra had been pacing the dinner for about two hours now, muttering to himself as he grabbed clothes and small objects. He was getting himself ready to head back into his hometown. He’d called up everyone else and found they’d be going along as well. It was only right it seemed.


“I just need this… Maybe I should stop by and bring some flowers? Would that even work?” He mumbled to himself, furrowing his eyebrows as he bit his lip. This was all so frustrating in a sense. Why was he so worried over outfits? One of his best friends had just died- He should have already been there. With a groan, he plopped down in one of the many seats in the restaurant, putting his face in his hands.


“Mr. West?”


His head whipped up in surprise and he looked over at the three pairs of curious yet cautious eyes staring at him.


“Are you okay?” The oldest of the group asked. Marcel sighed once more. He’d forgotten they were there. He sent them a smile and nodded his head.


“I’m alright Mia.” He spoke, his deep voice slightly scratchy. It still hurt from the crying he’d done the night before. “Just a bit frazzled. Now do you remember what I told you?” He asked the thirteen year old who nodded her head obediently.


“You’ll be leaving for a while and we have to go over to Miss Lisa’s house for our food. Don’t come here.” She recited, looking over at him. In response, Marcel sent her a proud smile, kissing the top of her head. She grinned up at him as Marcel pinched the cheeks of her two younger brothers- Vinny and Tyrone.


The three were orphans, their parents having died years before. Marcel had actually become good friends with them and was shocked when he found that their parents had died shortly after the family moved. They now stayed with an uncle who was no good. When he’d seen Mia looking unhealthy and practically skin and bones, he hadn’t hesitated, helping her out.


“Good. Proud of you darling.” He said, finishing up his packing. Minutes later he’d be saying goodbye to his three favorite people in the town and nine hours later he’d be driving back into his hometown. He looked around, letting the nostalgia hit him. So many things had transpired in this tiny town. The laughs, the frowns, the smiles, the tears… So many happy events- So many sad. Marcel remembered them all. Instead of going down the familiar street he drove all the way to the small motel, getting himself a room.


The old woman behind the counter was Miss. Mackins and he did his best to ignore the confused look on her face at seeing him. He knew it was weird. He should have went to his home. But Marcel found he couldn’t face his family again. Not yet at least.


Making his way into his room, he smiled happy to be finished with that horrid drive. It certainly wasn’t what he wanted to go through. But there was a good reason for it. He looked over at the clock and saw it was getting to be around the time they’d all agreed on meeting up together. With a grunt, he stood and made his way into the bathroom to take a quick shower. After that he changed into some jeans, one of his usual t-shirts and a nice jacket over it. He hopped back into his car and drove through the town, speeding a bit as he drove past his house.


It only took him two minutes to get to the park they’d always been at. He parked his car and climbed out of it, taking a small stroll throughout the park to a certain gazebo. As he looked around he could picture the memories from all that was around them.


The snowball fights, the water fights… Their days where they made bonfires, the days of dancing. He remembered everything. He also remembered their very dark days where they’d sit in the gazebo together in silence as a few of them cried. At least one of them did in the group’s lifetime. He had certainly done so himself a few times, apologizing after every two minutes.


He sighed, running a hand through his black, curly hair as he wondered what exactly would happen now.


How had everyone been? How had Ali been?


‘Damn, just got home and already thinking of her…’ He thought to himself with a chuckle as the gazebo finally came into view. He walked over, already seeing someone there. He smiled softly at the beautiful figure sitting there, scribbling in the notebook.


That was a sight he met daily when he’d grown up with the group. Watching her write and scribble when she had the chance. With a small grin, he silently walked into the gazebo and over to her. Reaching out, he slipped the pen out of her grasp and tapped her head lovingly with a smile.


“Hey there Ali…” He said, smiling at her. It had been a while since he’d seen her and he could certainly say that time had certainly done a wonderful job on her. She looked just as if not even more beautiful than she had when they’d first graduated. Though Marcel was sure that he’d always think of her as being a beautiful young woman just like Cody.


‘Speaking of Cody, where are the other two?’ He wondered to himself as he sat down beside Ali, giving her the pen back. He felt slightly odd and realized that even after all these years- him not sitting in his usual seat still felt odd enough to force him to quickly change seats. He sat near the entrance, letting his arm wrap around the one beam like usually did. He realized he never did sit next to Ali- always choosing the end seat so everyone else could be together. He’d always been the wallflower of the group of sorts, excluding himself from the others so they could have a fun time. He’d gotten used to watching them have fun and didn’t mind doing it again.


“How’s life been?” He asked her, his voice soft as he tilted his head, tapping his foot to a peculiar rhythm that could only be justified if anyone was able to look into his mind.

 

[Adrian Zeigler]

The secretary's heels made a sharp, distinct rhythm of noises as they made contact with the marble floor of the office building. In her hands was a piping hot cup of fresh coffee, made with very particular specifics. Despite only having been hired a few months earlier, Ellen Courtland was already attuned to her duties as the secretary of the young CFO of the international Akerman Group. As she walked in to Lucero Akerman's office, she uttered a quick greeting, "Good morning, Mr. Akerman. I hope you are having a pleasant morning. Here is your coffee, just as you like it. You have 10 minutes to prepare before the board meeting begins. It's best not to keep your father waiting." With that, she promptly turned and exited the spacious office.


Lucero, not quite awake on his part, simply stared at the large mahogany double doors before finally registering the cup of liquid caffeine sitting on the edge of his glass desk. As he drank his beverage, letting out the occasional sigh of satisfaction, he flicked through the presentation for the new, more cost-efficient employee restructuring he would be proposing. His father had already gone over the presentation in private, but convincing the other board members would be difficult, especially seeing as how many of them had been coveting the CFO spot for more years than Lucero had even been old enough to work. A long time ago, Lucero would not have been one to voice his ideas against a crowd; he'd rather keep his thoughts to himself. But, a certain girl and her group of friends had changed all that in high school, and he couldn't help but reminisce about those treasured times.


Lucero was quickly shaken out of his stupor when the clock above his office door rung, signaling the beginning of the meeting. Hurriedly, he gathered his papers, finished his coffee in a single gulp, and left his office while swing his jacket on over his shoulders. Before he stepped into the boardroom, he took a moment to compose himself. Now that he'd gotten here, it would not do to fail and, in doing so, tarnish his father's reputation and decision to hire Lucero. With newly affirmed resolve, he stepped into the office and began. "Ladies and gentleman of the board, it is my pleasure to present to you my proposal for cutting employee management costs for the new fiscal year. Let's begin by turning to page 1 of the portfolio sitting before each of you..."


Two hours later, Lucero stepped out of the boardroom with a noticeable smile on his face. In his eyes, the pitch had been a success, and some of the board members even seemed to look forward to working with him. Most importantly to him, however, his father's mouth turned up a few degrees at the corners, enough that Lucero knew he approved. With a spring in his step, he made his way back to his office, only to find Ellen sitting at her desk, puffy-eyed and sniffling. When she saw her employer take a detour towards her, she quickly composed herself. "What's the matter, Ellen? The pitch was a success. Moments like this should be celebrated, and not soured by other sad thoughts." Lucero said with a slight smile. Ellen, for her part, tried to return the smile, but couldn't. "Mr. Akerman, I... I don't... Lucero, you have a call in your office. You need to take it. Please, go now." A bit perplexed, Lucero complied, feeling unnerved by Ellen's tone. She had used his given name, a sure sign that something serious had happened, and the call had come in through his private line. In the back of his mind, a wry voice lamented that it was just his luck for some misfortune to occur just as he had a small personal victory. Thus, it was with slight hesitation that Lucero answered his phone, perplexed to find that the caller ID came up as an unknown number.


"Hello. This is Lucero Akerman speaking. May I ask who is calling?" he asked cordially. The voice responded, and looking back on it, it was a voice that should have been familiar. But, at the time, the only thing that registered was one name: Cassie. "She was on her way here...it was raining," the voice trailed off. Confused, Lucero knitted his eyebrows. Cassie was driving, and it was raining. So what? It was as if Lucero's mind was battling the logical conclusion. It lost. When the reality of what had occurred hit Lucero, his knees buckled. Fate took pity on him, and he found himself crumpled in his leather office chair. The news sapped him of his strength and his words, leaving him gaping slightly without a clue as to how to respond. Quite frankly, Lucero didn't believe it. Cassie, who was the first person to welcome him in the town, who'd listened to his frustrations with his father when no one else would, with whom he'd danced... she couldn't die. In that moment, Lucero's mind identified the only possible truth: the call was a lie. "When do you think you can stop by?" That did it.


One moment, Lucero was in his chair, and the next, he was standing and furiously speaking into the receiver. "I don't know who this is or why you're doing this, but this has to stop. This deranged joke is not remotely funny. I suggest you refrain from calling this number again. Next time you do, I'll be prosecuting you until a presidential pardon won't save your sorry arse. Don't. Test. Me." he spat venomously before ending the call. Moments later, the phone made a sharp crack as it shattered into multiple pieces, leaving a chip on the wooden door where Lucero had thrown it.


Ellen's head peeped in shortly afterwards to find Lucero staring out the floor-to-ceiling windows that comprised one of the walls of his office. His tie and suit jacket were laying haphazardly across his table, and his eyes held none of he confidence he'd had only minutes earlier from the board meeting. "Mr. Akerman... I heard... I'm so sorry... Shall I cancel tomorrow's lunch reservations and postpone the meetings until..." she began, but was softly interrupted. "No, that won't be necessary." came the soft response from Lucero. His eyes never left the city skyline of Midtown Manhattan as he spoke. Ellen stepped forward into the room and tried again. "Mr. Aker... Lucero, you need time. Please, let me revise your schedule. Your father will surely understand, and a helicopter to take you to the airfield can be here in 10 minutes. The jet is already fueled, and you can be there by tomorrow. Just take some time to..." This time, the answer was more forceful. "No!" a wild-eyed Lucero shouted, whirling quickly to face Ellen. "This sick joke will not affect me. Call and make sure all of tomorrow's plans are on track. And find out who the depraved individual who called me is. I want him found and dealt with." Turning back to his window, he continued in a softer, yet colder and firm voice. "That is a direct order from your employer, Ms. Courtland." She could do nothing but sadly reply, "Yes, Mr. Akerman, sir. As you wish." before backing out of the office, leaving Lucero to his thoughts of a certain girl.

 

[ShatteredSoul]

Jet lag is a huge fucking understatement.


The long fight drowned on and on, and while Kat intended to sleep for most of it, the sensation avoided her. She knew in her heart that she could not be bothered with trying to close her eyes. Too many utterly descriptive images flooded her mind of Cassie's last moments. Did she cry? Scream? Did anyone stop to help her? Was it quick, swift, or did she lay there for hours having time to think over all the small details of life? Kat could sympathize with the latter, for it seemed to her that she was suddenly more aware of everything around her. It was quite an odd sensation, being able to feel your own weight in each movement you made. Every time her hand moved to brush her hair out of her face, the seriousness of her situation bared down on her and made her arm feel as if it weighed a thousand pounds. The only sounds to be heard where the abrupt, forceful turbine mechanisms doing their daily routine, something they had done since the day of their invention.


This was the first time Kat had ever been in a private jet. It was strange, being all alone in this metal contraption with the exception of the two pilots in the cockpit. Most often, Kat traveled in her large red tour bus with the others in her ensemble, laughing and enjoying the chaotic lives they lived. A few times, Kat even rode public air transportation simply because she loved to interact with fans and sometimes it was nice to be forced to sit next to a complete stranger that didn't recognize Kat. It was nice to pretend to be someone else for a while. But at this moment in time, Kat was torn between wanting to be someone else and being thankful for the life she had. If she was another person, she wouldn't have to deal with this tremendous heartbreak as well as the guilt that followed. But, at the same time, a part of her was genuinely thankful for the blessing of Cassie in her life. She wouldn't be the same person today if not for Cassie.


Back to the present. Kat was sitting in the black Mercedes, a rugged picture in her hand. It was her and Cassie, caught in mid-laugh, closely embracing one another. The distant memory played and replayed in the blonde's head, bringing her almost to tears. No, I can't do this. Not here. Tucking the image into the pocket of her coat, Kat stepped out of the vehicle. It was a brisk day, a Sunday actually. Kat had never been one to go to church and she had never been a big religious person, but she knew the upcoming funeral would certainly have some Christian ties.


It was 12:55. 5 minutes early, just as planned. Kat had never been one for being on time to things, but she knew this was important. Two figures occupied the spot already and a tremble shivered down Kat's back. The last time all of them were in this spot together, Cassie was with them. And now the was not. Each step seemed to span for hours as she dragged herself up to the gazebo. Tugging her jacket around her tighter, Kat looked at the two for a few moments before speaking. "...Hey." It was short, and slightly awkward, but what else was there to say?

 

[Poe]

It wasn’t quite warm enough to be without a cardigan or jacket, but Ali could not even register the chill on her skin from the wind under the covered gazebo. After her first few words, nothing was coming out in complete thoughts, but instead in fragmented pieces of mess. Every word she wrote made reality a bit more clear, solidified it as fact. They had really lost Cassie and she couldn’t help but think about the word choice. To lose someone, it made very little literal sense as losing usually meant misplacing and death was too definite for that. It felt like loss, though. It felt like they had just misplaced Cassie, like they couldn’t find her, and everything in her heart still longed to bring her back into the group. Ali even had the urge to move back to her own spot in the gazebo but she couldn’t manage it. The first place you look for something that is lost is in the last place you had it.


Losing her father had been different and it made her angry that death was one of those concepts that never got easier. She’d been spending so much time denying Cassie’s death that when she saw the girl she was only left with more questions than answers. At least with her father, she knew there was a risk. He was in a volatile area and there were known attacks on American camps prior to the destruction of his own. With Cassie, there was no preface. There was no coming to terms with the fact that their last encounter had been one with the intention of seeing each other again. Hell, she had just talked to her on the phone a few days ago, but the sound of her voice was already a distance memory in her head and it made anxiety rise in her throat. Forgetting anything meant losing the girl they loved so dearly and Ali couldn’t let that happen, so she skipped a few lines and started scribbling a bit more.


The first day we met, you told me that I looked lost in the hallway and offered to guide me to class. You’ve been doing it ever since, Cassie, and I still need you here. I need your kind words and warm voice, your gusto and bravery, I need you. I need you here with me and I don’t know how to make that happen or how to fix this but I’m starting to begin to think I can’t. How do you hold onto something without letting go of yourself? How do you carry on when the world around you stops spinning? How do I keep your memory alive without drowning in the thought of you?


I think —


The pen was snatched from her hand and Ali felt a soft tap on her head. Glancing up at the intruder, Ali felt her heart leap into her thought at the sight of Marcel there. It had been a long time since they had seen each other, not since graduation, and she was surprised to find nothing but happiness in her heart at seeing him. They’d dated in high school, much more serious than anything she had ever had before, but when her father had died things got…well, they got shaky, and a lot of Ali’s trust and love was shattered. She spent the better part of a year trying to pick it up and piece herself back together while grieving over the loss of her father. It wasn’t an ideal situation by any means but Marcel was a good guy, deep down, and she knew that he had loved her once — but grief does things to people. It changes them, molds them, and as they break apart other people fall through the cracks.


They had agreed to breakup because of the ‘stress it put on her’ and how she needed to focus on being there for her mother and taking care of herself. At the time, she had harbored a lot of hurt because it felt as though Marcel had just ducked out when things got hard, but in retrospect, she realized how young they were. No one ever tells you how to death with death but at least, as an adult, you understand how hard this life can be and that not everyone survives. He’d grown well and was still that same attractive foreign boy all the girls fawned over. It was comforting to see his face, to hear his voice and to know that they were allowed this one moment together. He had taken a seat next to her but then quickly moved back to his spot and she could understand. None of this felt right and they were all walking on glass.


“Hey Marcel,” she breathed out, forgetting the way his name tasted on her tongue and she missed it, entirely. His question elicited a soft laugh from her, almost desperate to feel anything other than the crippling sorrow in her heart. Her body, for the most part, was not dealing with the news well and she hadn't been able to eat, sleep or drink anything save for a bit of water all day. The constant feeling of tears behind her eyes nearly drove her mad but she held them back with every ounce of her strength. “How’s life been?” she repeated his question. “Well, I guess the world is still spinning — so that’s one thing.”


“What about you? How’s New Jersey and the restaurant?” Ali asked, trying with everything she had to turn the conversation away from her. Marcel, of all people, did not know about her mother — only Will and Cassie really ever knew what had happened post-graduation — and she was not about to break that news to him. The news that she had lost all hope of ever achieving her own dreams and was tied down to a town where she watched her mother slowly deteriorate in front of a television would have killed him. After their breakup, he had never stopped trying to be there for her but it wasn't the same. You couldn’t just run away and then step back in like nothing had ever happened. It took time and deep in her heart she knew Marcel would’ve been heartbroken at the sight of what her mother had become. While her dad had always been fond of him, her mother took an instant liking to him and acted almost like a mother to him. She was always convinced they would end up together because she had ‘never seen her baby as happy as she was when with Marcel.’ A shiver ran up her spine.


Their conversation went on briefly until another voice broke through the crisp air. Ali looked up to see Kat, in all her rockstar glory, glancing down at the two and offering a simple greeting. Ali mustered as genuine a smile as she could. “Hey to you too, stranger,” she prodded a bit playfully, “It’s been a while.”

 

[secondhandSARAnade]

​

It just didn't make any sense. Things like these weren't supposed to happen to them - to her. Cassie had been the one to make it seem like the group was invincible, as if anything could be possible so long as they had each other. Even after graduation, it was obvious that she believed neither time nor distance were obstacles when it came to their friendship. And it was extremely difficult to disagree with someone who wouldn't stop grinning. So much for that, though.


Will found himself back in his flat, sitting at the edge of his bed. The call had happened only a day ago, but it felt much longer than that, as he'd barely gotten any sleep during the night. Who knew how many hours he'd spent just sitting there, staring blankly ahead? When was the last time he'd eaten? How had he even gotten home, anyway? With a sigh, he dragged his fingers through his hair for probably the tenth time in the last five minutes, but was interrupted by the sound of his phone from beside him.


Lily. Had anyone told her yet? Regardless, Will wasn't sure if he could handle his sister's antics at the moment. Once the ringing stopped, he put his phone on silent, just as another call came in from the same person. Three missed calls later, he finally gave in and picked up.


"Ugh, about time!" Will had to pull his phone away from his ear and lower the volume; she was literally shouting. Normally he would've complained, but perhaps he should have seen that coming. "You're not gonna believe who I just saw coming out of the hotel-"


"I can't do this right now, Lily. I'm...in the middle of something." It was odd that the news hadn't reached her yet, but Will guessed it could be because it was still pretty early where she lived. Whatever the reason, he certainly wasn't going to be the one to inform her. It was selfish of him, maybe, but someone would eventually let her know.


"What are you..." The line fell silent for a while before a groan of disgust came through. "Really, Will, that's absolutely revolting. I'm your sister, for heaven's sake! Way too much information."


A frown of confusion pulled his eyebrows together. "Wait, that's not what-"


"Yeah, yeah. Call me after you've finished up, okay?" A faint "that's just gross" could be heard before the line went dead rather abruptly. Will blinked at his phone for a long moment then shook his head slowly. She's got to be fucking loony.


Spotting the time, Will realized he would have to be on his way soon if he didn't want to be late. He missed all of them dearly, but this wasn't how he'd wanted their long-awaited reunion to go. Something was missing - well, a lot of things were, including a particular someone. The thought brought another grimace to his face. Eventually, though, Will made his way into the shower and out again, pulling on a new change of clothes. It was just another t-shirt - a grey one this time - and a pair of cargo shorts. After drying his hair and grabbing his things, he paused by the door to check the time once more, then headed out. Maybe if he was lucky, he'd only be a little late.


Before getting in the car, Will stared down at his phone for a while, hesitating. Then, after deciding to go for it and sending a text, he started out for home.

Cody W.

me

hey

me

you in town yet?

 

[haydenly16]

Cody, thick steaming Styrofoam cup in hand, approached the old place. It had the same smell from the last time she had been here. Just days before she left for college, where they all promised to stay in touch. A promise that never really stuck around. A promise that was forgotten before she could even take her first college exam. Life was busy. Cody was busy. And while Cody was busy, life had been cruel. Cruel to all of them. She wasn't sure how they'd get along without Cassie. How their group would survive without the small girl that had held them together for so long.


Cody was the almost the last to arrive, which was incredibly abnormal, but her mother had wanted to talk to her; however, Cody hadn't been able to stomach anything her mother had said to her. She neared the old wooden gazebo as her phone buzzed. She pulled her phone from her pocket. Her heart did a little leap like it always did with Will. It was always a mixture of pure elation, love, and nervousness. Her "adventurous twin" and partner-in-crime held a very strange and foreign place in Cody. A place in her heart that he had forged exactly for him, with no other person being able to fit it. There was so much she wanted to say, but she knew the moment he got there she would throw her arms around him and it would be like they'd never been separated. She stopped walking to answer the text message.

"Hey babe."


"Yeah. I'm in town already. Literally can't wait to see you."

"Get here soon. Please. Much love."
​

She put her phone away in her pocket, pulling her jacket a little tighter around her. So many memories rushed into her head as soon as she stepped within a couple of feet. This is where Cody had first met the group, excitedly dragged by Cassie.


"I've met her!" Cassie was screaming. "I've met the perfect girl for our group!" Cody was a tall, thin rail that wore her then boyfriend's swimmer letterman jacket, trudging through the cold to meet the rest of the group. "She's perfect." Cassie stopped suddenly and Cody stopped next to her, instantly sliding on a patch of ice and falling flat on her ass. At this time, the entire group ran to her aide and almost every single person had fallen on the large patch of ice, one right after the other. Then they all stopped, looking around at each other. Cody had been the first one to break into full laughter: head thrown back, mouth open wide, eyes closed laughter that instantly erupted throughout the group. "I told you she was perfect!" Cassie yelled over all the laughter. Cody had known right then that this would forever be her group.


Cody stepped onto the wooden step, interrupting the rest of them. She looked as they all turned to her. Marcel (the chef that Cody knew was going to be famous soon), Ali (the one that had more compassion than Cody ever would), and Kat (the brilliant musician that Cody had heard on the radio several times back in Colorado) were all standing in the old gazebo and looking at her. Cody had really missed all the kind eyes that were looking at her. But she knew things were missing. Precious things. Cassie, first off. And Will and Lucero were both missing. It was very strange to see only half of the group. But she suddenly felt more at home than she had in two years. These were her people; this was her group. They were shattered and broken and upset, but they were going through it together. Cody's eyes filled with tears as she stepped into the middle of the wooden floor. "Hey guys," she murmured as one tear rolled down her cheek.

 

[JujuBee]

God. Her voice.


That melodic sound that had just drifted into his ears and had caused his heart to leap with joy. When had he ever felt so happy over the sound of someone? It had truly been too long since he’d seen this beauty and Marcel began to regret not having visited earlier than he was now. He wasn’t even visiting to catch up with anything. He was here because of Cassie-


He took in a deep breath. Now wasn’t the time for that. He’d mourn later on when he would be in the fake safety of his hotel room. When everything would seem as though it were okay now and would always be. But Marcel knew it wouldn’t be. This would never be the same. He forced a smile onto his face as he turned to look back at Ali. Those beautiful eyes looking at him…


It was then that Marcel realized- After moving away and going to college. He’d met plenty of women during the small period of time. He’d even tried doing a few of them. Sure some came about halfway and even one had managed to truly make him happy but- None had ever replaced her. Ali was a special woman to him- She was in her own category whether she knew it or not. She’d been his true first love. She’d understood him in ways that no one else did. But despite the connection he’d had with her- trials and tribulations proved to him that even the healthiest of relationships could grow sick and wither away.


He looked up at her and sent a small smile and shrug. “I’m doing just fine. New Jersey is a nice place. I do enjoy it. The restaurant is doing well so far. Making enough to keep it open at least.” He said with a sheepish grin. The urge to tell her the truth became stronger and stronger with every word that left his lips. He wasn’t doing fine. Far from it. He lost his home... He hardly talked to his family. His restaurant was his home and job and even then they were just scrapping by. But he would keep it a secret. Ali would be the last person he would tell about his predicament. He wanted to appear strong because that’s what he was supposed to be…


His eyes flickered away from her to the beauty that had just arrived. “Kat,” Marcel spoke, sending her a small, genuine smile. “It’s nice to see you again.” It had been a while since he’d seen her. Kat was one of the people in the group that while it had taken a bit longer than the others- Marcel had come to love her dearly. She was the little sister he’d always wanted- so sweet and nice. He was proud of her for making it big. Her first album played at his restaurant all the time.


He would have said more but the sound of someone else entering the gazebo caught his attention. He turned to see Cody and smiled softly at her. If Cody was here that meant Will was on his way…


“It’s nice to see you again Cody…” He said softly, his smile faltering slightly at the sight of the tear running down her cheek. He glanced at the other two before standing up. In two seconds he was in front of her. He wiped the tear away before pulling her into a tight hug.


“It’s okay Cody…” He mumbled in her hair as he rocked them back and forth. “It’ll be okay. We’ll get through this alright? We just have to take this slowly. But we’ll get there. We’ll make it.”


For now we just need to take one step at a time.


One step at a time...

 

[secondhandSARAnade]

Driving had always been a tricky task for Will. It was somewhat bearable when doing delivery, but being on the road for an extended amount of time was more difficult, despite the fact that he did so on almost a daily basis. All that practice had definitely helped him improve since high school, though. He remembered how none of his friends would trust him to be behind the wheel, as long as they could help it. Still, the familiar way towards the town he'd long since grown to love felt different today. Perhaps it was the weight that seemed to be resting in his chest, heavy with an emotion he couldn't quite put a finger on. It was a sensation he hadn't even known could be so tangible until this point.


A few minutes into driving, Will looked around to locate his phone and found it lying face-down in the passenger seat. Had Cody replied yet? There was no way of knowing, he realized, since he'd forgotten to turn the sound back on before getting in the car. Though tempted to reach over and check, he knew he had to keep his eyes on the road, no matter how much he wanted to hear from the girl. It'd been so long since he'd last seen her. And honestly, it was a wonder how no amount of time apart ever seemed to make things awkward or different between them. Of course things changed over the years, but whenever they would meet up every once it a while, she was always the same old Cody - brilliantly witty and in-your-face as ever. He guessed today would be an exception, which was understandable.


After a while, Will noticed that it was becoming increasingly difficult to stay still and focus solely on driving. It took a while, but he finally figured out what it was. "Oh bugger," he muttered to himself, the sound just barely coming above the hum of the car. Taking the wheel with one hand, he used the other to drag his fingers through his short curls. Of course he would forget to take his medication on a day like today. "Stupid..." A glance at the clock on the dashboard told him it'd only passed about half an hour since he'd left his place, meaning he was probably a little less than halfway there. In any other case, he would have brushed it off and continued on his way, but this was no time to be risky. Not after Cassie had to go like that. The thought alone made him wince, so he pushed it away for now. He decided he would make a stop at the next gas station. At least that way he'd be able to think straight.


Eventually, Will was able to make a stop after a couple more miles and surprisingly enough, it didn't take much rummaging to find the familiar blue pills. He couldn't remember ever stashing them in his car, but he wasn't going to complain. Using water from a bottle he also found (that was who knows how old), he took his daily dose and sat back while he gave the effects some time to kick in. Upon checking his phone, he saw that Lily had called again - six times, to be exact - and that Cody had indeed replied. Her texts brought a smile to his lips, but he chose not to reply. She was probably on the way to the park by now anyway and if no other issues came up, he'd be there soon as well.


Will was actually quite a frequent at their little gazebo, as he still visited pretty often. Though, it was never the same without everyone else there to fill the place with their laughter. Even now as he approached the wooden structure already occupied by the very people who had drastically changed his life for the better, an undefinable feeling swept over him, keeping him from running towards them like he wanted to. The first person that came into clear view was Kat. She looked stunning, like she always had - the complete embodiment of all the world's serenity and peace of mind. Somehow, she managed to be graceful even while being still, which was a quality Will couldn't ever dream of possessing.


"Sorry I'm late," was his greeting as he stepped up onto the platform. A sheepish grin tugged at his mouth as he looked around at each of them. He considered offering up some excuses as to why he didn't make it on time, but decided against it, seeing that grief was all too evident on all of their faces. Besides, his lack of punctuality was nothing new to any of them.

 

[ShatteredSoul]

Even just standing here in this old spot gave Kat the chills in a way that she had never hoped to experience. It was this exact spot where so many childhood memories went down and right now it was all just to much to handle. Ali's simple words greeted her and although they took a moment to register in Katrina's scattered brain, she returned the light smile. It's been a while. Those four words hit Kat like a truck and crumbled down the emotionless wall that she had started to build up inside her self. Guilt, regret, sadness, it all came rushing back like water through a broken dam. It's been a hell of a while, you got that right. God, why didn't I stay in contact with anyone? At least Cassie even. I can't even remember the last words I said to her.


Another voice came into contact with Kat's ears and she couldn't help but break herself out of her thoughts to offer a sad smile back to Marcel. "It's good to see you too." Her voice, generally upbeat and happy, tried to sound casual but there was an underlying somber tone in each of her words. If only the circumstances were different. And then suddenly Cody was there, adventurous fun-loving Cody, with tears in her eyes. She looked beautiful as ever and Kat couldn't help but remember why she had crushed on the girl the first time she had met her. This is this first time I've ever seen Cody cry. It didn't suit her. Her generally playful face was coated with the pain that they all felt and Kat wanted to hug her and tell her they were all going to be okay, except she didn't believe she could. Her feet were cemented to the ground and it felt as if she was a thousand miles away from the others. It was only when she heard another male's voice that Kat realized just how difficult these next few days were going to be.


It was Will. Kat knew that voice without even turning around. She could pick that voice out of a crowd of a million people. Oh God, why didn't I realize he would be here? Things between us didn't exactly end on a happy note. Visions of arguments and lustful, passionate kisses and intimate moments and more arguments flooded through her mind as she just envisioned the sheepish look that Will undoubtably would have plastered on his face. I don't think I can do this right now. It's too much. But yet, here she was and here he was. There was no denying that. Time to face up to her past. We were so young and we thought we could conquer the world together, but now I'm scared to look at his face. Ironic, isn't it? Without further ado, Kat willed herself to turn and face him. Her face met his with a casual look plastered upon it, and Kat's body relaxed a little. She could tell that any other time he would have made some sly comment about being late, but thankfully he seemed to understand the depth of their situation. "Will, hey." Part of her wanted to run to him and to hug him and to explain just how sorry she was for how everything went down back when they were so young, but Kat knew now was not the time. Another part of her wanted to stay in there and not talk and just stare into those beautiful eyes of his and just live in their memories for a while, yet the more logical part of her wanted to just offer a simple handshake and pretend like nothing ever happened between the two of them. Instead, Kat just curled her lips in to a small, calm smile that signified that she hadn't forgotten their past together, but she was willing to try and start again.

 

[Adrian Zeigler]

Ellen made her way back to her desk, her face somber after Lucero's outburst. As she sat down, she sighed and picked up her telephone, absent-mindedly dialing the numbers of various clients. "Mr. Xiang's office? This is Ellen Courtland calling on behalf of Lucero Akerman of the Akerman Group. Could you confirm that Mr. Xiang is still available for tomorrow's business luncheon?... He is? Ah, very good. I took the liberty of arranging for a window-side table with a view of Central Park, so I hope that it is to Mr. Xiang's liking. Thank you. Have a wonderful day."


Placing the phone down on the receiver rather heavily, Ellen sank down into her chair, and the fake smile she'd worn during the phone conversation for the sake of sounding pleasant was replaced by a deep-seated frown. As much as she wanted to follow Lucero's instructions and confirm his appointments as if nothing significant had happened, she'd come to care for Lucero much more than any regular employee, especially when she learned that he'd lost his mother to cancer, just as she'd lost hers only 5 years ago. When her mother had passed away, she was 20, and her entire family had supported her and her father. Looking back, that had been invaluable for her healing. But, Lucero... His mother died when he was 7, leaving him a poor orphan. Even when he was adopted, Mr. Akerman was not the type to help heal a child's heart. Ellen could tell that Lucero had learned to bottle everything in, and it made her worry.


For that reason, ever since she became his secretary when he first started at the Akerman Group as a 22 year old college graduate, Ellen had mothered Lucero through his rise through the ranks at the Akerman Group. Comforting him when his father criticized a mistake, celebrating with him when he succeeded... Ellen was privy to Lucero's real persona, that of a real, vulnerable person and not a businessman. And the real Lucero, in spite of his thick skin as a business executive, was sensitive when it came to personal relationships. This Cassie... She must have been someone important to him. Ellen didn't know why or how, but somehow... When she heard the unknown voice over the phone, she could tell. Whatever the call was about, the news would be bad. And whoever was calling, their voice told Ellen that it would hit Lucero hard. At that moment, she decided. She could not consider herself Lucero's personal secretary and let this go. So, with resolve in her eyes, Ellen began her search for the story behind Cassie and Lucero.

 

[haydenly16]

Cody smiled sadly as Marcel appeared in front of her before she could blink. Of course he did. That was Marcel. Suddenly, he hugged her and she flinched. "I don't want to burn you," she said, holding her cup away from his body as he rocked her. She felt more tears well up in her eyes as he spoke to her, but she swallowed them. When he stopped rocking her, she looked up at him and touched his face. "Marcel," she murmured. "You've been sad. For too long. Before Cassie." She whispered, looking at him with sad eyes. It was her mother, see-all piece of her that could always tell, especially with these people. She always knew, it was just her thing, and sometimes it got on some nerves. "Talk to me," she murmured to him with a sad look of understanding. Suddenly, she heard Will speak and her heart jumped.


She wasn't sure what exactly it was she felt for Will. She wasn't in love with him and she was very fully aware of his fondness for Kati. But he was special to her. They were a matching set and it was always the same when they met. It was like they had never been separated. He was the person she always called whenever Vet School got too much for her. She never really needed to complain to him, just to hear his voice. It struck something in Cody that nothing else could. It wasn't romantic between them, though they had always had flings on and off. Hooking up and such was never a big deal between the two of them. She sighed, patting Marcel's face gently. "We will talk later." She said sternly, turning around to face the lanky blonde that was her other half. The whole group always understood when it came to the two of them. "You're always late," Cody said to him, waiting as he was greeted. However, Cody couldn't help herself. She threw her arms around Will's neck and hugged him tightly. "I missed you." she murmured as she hugged him.

 

[Poe]

And there it was. The reunion they had been waiting for, save for Lucero, as all of Cassie’s wayward friends came congregating back under the very gazebo that had long since been the only church they’d ever needed, a place where they found faith in one another, but Ali couldn’t seem to make her feet move. Everyone embraced and stood off towards the mouth of the aging structure, but not Ali. No, she stayed put — not because she didn’t want to be around them but because she couldn’t seem to process much of anything these days. The welcome to Kat had been all she could manage. Words had never been difficult for her but for some reason every last one seemed to escape her.


Everything was eerily similar. Cody was still doing that thing where she managed to see the hurt in you before you were willing to feel it. Kat and Marcel were still trying to be strong. Will was still as late as always, and Lucero was still nowhere to be seen without Cassie. But worst of all, Ali was the one who had changed. Always the one who felt too much, but after her mother and Cassie, and after her friends had all left — there was no place for feeling too much. The world was moving too fast and her shoulders, she found, handled the weight of other people’s problems more than they could ever carry the weight of her own.


But here she was with a pain that was demanding to be felt and she didn’t know how.


Her grip on her small purple notebook was vice-like, white knuckles, and but her eyes were soft. Everything within her feeling everything but nothing at all, so she held her tongue. A kind soft smile as each managed their way into the gazebo, but nothing more. Everything had suddenly gotten so real and it was impossible to stomach. She stuffed her notebook into her back pocket and crossed her arms in front of her, hoping in some childish way to keep the hurt at bay, and just simply watched. Watched as everyone else managed to express the grief she couldn’t feel even though it had been pounding away at her tear ducts for days. Cody was crying, Kat was choked up, and the boys were, well, the boys. They would feel in time.


But the crippling fear of becoming her mother forced Ali to soldier on, even if it meant not facing what had happened. Even if it meant just being there for everyone else. Even if it meant being the observer. It was a role she was born to play, after all. How could she fail?

 

[JujuBee]

Marcel had always been something of a teddybear. He was one of those guys who truly didn’t mind being cuddled with by anyone. If they needed to comfort and he was around, he’d be the one to give it. He glanced down at Cody, sending her one of his soft, reassuring smiles that eh’d grown accustomed to giving to those that needed it. He didn’t flinch when Cody touched his face. He was used to it. Growing up, he’d gotten used to Cody touching him. That was just how their relationship played out. Good friends who knew what comforting touch to give to one another. However, her touch and the words after didn’t give him much comfort- more surprise then anything.


He bit his lip, looking away from her. He wouldn’t give in. He refused to give in to her wish for him to talk. He’d actually been relieved to hear Will’s voice when he popped up. He glanced down back at Cody when she spoke of them talking and sighed out a breath of relief. ‘And here’s Will with the save…’ He thought to himself as he looked over at the young man. Will still looked as good as he did in their high school years. He seemed happy and healthy like the rest of them here… Of course he was late. When was he not. Marcel couldn’t help the small chuckle that escaped his lips at the thought. That was his Will. The one he remembered. In a way Marcel couldn’t help but be just a bit relieved at the fact that his friend hadn’t changed over the years.


‘I wonder what else hasn’t changed with him…’ Marcel wondered, glancing around at the others in a way to try and distract himself from the sudden heat of wave that had washed over him. Remembrance of hot, passionate nights spent in Will’s room when both were at their lows crossed his mind. Those were some crazy ass years. A small pinch of guilt hit him after. Dark eyes flickered toward his high school sweetheart, seeing the way she crossed her arms. Oh if only Ali had known just what had gone on through their relationship… Would they be where they were now? He didn’t know. He didn’t want to know either.


Turning away from the two who were getting reunited, Marcel made his way to Kat, ruffling her hair in a gentle way and sending her a smile. He walked past, walking over to Ali. Stopping in front of her, he made sure no one else would be able to see her. He didn’t touch her, not knowing whether or not it would be okay for her. She looked like she was holding her pain in and he knew that one comforting touch could possibly break the walls she’d built and along with that came the possibility of her getting angry with him for breaking down. He grit his teeth in thought of the dark days their relationship went through and forced the thoughts out of his mind. Now wasn’t the time.


Taking a deep breath, he reached out and took a hold of her chin. Tilting it up slightly so that she could stare into his eyes. Marcel stared back at her with such an intensity that he felt she’d know just what emotions swam through his eyes. He didn’t bother saying anything for a few moments, choosing to just stare at the beauty before him.


“You’re not okay.” He spoke, his voice low and gruff though it held a softness to it. “Let it out Ali… Just let it out okay? We’re all friends here. You don’t have to hide your pain. Not with me here…” He said, wondering if that would break down the walls. “You don’t have to be strong. Let me be the strong one for the both of us.” It was then that he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close to his body and letting out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. The others in the gazebo were the farthest thing from his mind. For now- All focus was on Ali and he honestly wouldn’t of had it any other way.

 

[secondhandSARAnade]

As his gaze shifted from one familiar face to another, William was reminded of the reason they were here in the first place. If only it didn't have to be like this. If only they didn't have to be brought together in the most horrid of ways. Or, perhaps it was just Cassie still being herself, making sure the gang stuck together through whatever was thrown at them. After all, drastic measures were her specialty. It was a funny thought, in a way, but also probably terribly inappropriate, and it only seemed to weigh Will's heart down more. He struggled a little to breathe.


Will's blue eyes eventually found Ali, sitting the farthest from him with her arms crossed. As an undeniably simple-minded bloke, he'd always found it difficult to decipher her expressions, which in this case appeared to be somber. It hadn't really crossed his mind until this point how the news might have hit the others, especially her. She had certainly had a shitty past couple years in more ways than one and it sometimes made him wonder why life had suddenly decided to turn its back on such a lovely human being. It was unfair, to say the least, just like a lot of things were now.


The sound of Kat's voice drew Will's attention back to where she was standing. Relationships had never been an easy thing for the guy, so it was always amazing to remember that somehow things had worked out between them, which was admittedly mostly thanks to her. Somehow, he'd managed to fall in love - though still a puzzling concept - and things had been marvelous for a while. They'd definitely had their share of rough patches, but none of that came to mind as the rising celebrity flashed him the slightest smile. If one thing hadn't changed, it was the way just one of her looks could bring him comfort, even if her expression also held inevitable sorrow. "Kat," Will greeted her with a meager grin of his own, walking over and eventually closing the distance between them by pulling her into a hug. It was hesitant, a little cautious, but every bit as genuine.


After pulling away, Will's eyes wandered again and were met with Cody's tearful ones. The sight was a foreign one, and under any other circumstance, he would have given her hell about it. Now, it just made him more painfully aware of the lump in his own throat. As he was casting a fond look Marcel's way, Cody hugged him in her usual manner. His arms wrapped around her almost automatically and he closed his eyes for a moment, exhaling slowly. "Missed you too," he murmured back, slightly into her hair since he was only a couple inches taller than her. "This is fucked up." The last words were spoken in more of a whisper, blurted out before he could even think them through properly.

 

[ShatteredSoul]

Kat could barely take her eyes off Will as Marcel walked over to her. His playful hand felt distant and unfocused as he gently tussled her hair, and she forced herself to pull her eyes up to meet his. She mirrored his smile with a little effort and managed to give off a pretty convincing look, all the while hoping no one else could see how clearly uncomfortable she was with their current situation. Calmly shifting her weight to her left foot, she turned back to Will who had began to approach her with a slight smile. Oh god, that smile. It was like a thousand daggers in her chest. It had been quite some time since she had seen that goofy little grin of his. This was weird. It felt weird, not wrong, just... weird. To be honest, she hadn't really imagined this moment in all of the daydreams she had created during her tour. She dreamed of meeting her favorite singer, of getting her autograph, of making out with the hot girl in the band that belonged to her rival, of winning a Grammy for newest music star, but never had she dreamed of meeting Will again and seeing those eyes squint in the playful way they did when he curled the corners of his lips up. He had barely even crossed her mind until now. It was like stepping in front of a train and suddenly you were smacked back to reality. He's coming over to me, oh man. What does he plan to do? Awkwardly stand next to me? A handshake maybe? Maybe even a hug? Either way, Kat felt like whatever he chose would set the tone for the rest of this somber meet-up. He was close now, and without any form of hesitation Will wrapped his arms around her in a gentle way. She could tell by his body language that he was slightly unsure of if this was the right move to make, but Kat relaxed herself a bit in his arms, letting him know that she wasn't thrown off guard or feeling uncomfortable with it.


She opened her mouth to say something, but quickly shut it as the hug drew to a close and Will had already started off. A silent breath escaped her dry lips as she realized she didn't even know what she was about to say. Things bobbed around on the surface of her mind but none of them fit the situation. Anyways, it was clear Will had other intention. As Katrina eyed the hug between Cody and Will, she blinked for a few moments and just kind of stood there as the two embraced. Of course. The two had always been close in high school. They were practically twins. The contact between them looked comfortable and natural, and Kat couldn't help but assume that the two had finally engaged in a serious relationship. Their hug was a lot longer and clearly more natural then Kat and Will's. Her chest felt a bit heavy now that she realized she probably wouldn't get a good chance to apologize to Will for the way things ended between them. It would just be too awkward at at time like this.


Suddenly, Kat caught herself in her thoughts. Alright hon, let's chill out a bit here. You're here for Cassie, remember? You know, that one girl that basically saved your life? Yeah, this is for her. You didn't come back to rekindle some memories or to apologize for past mistakes. It took a short moment of self-talk, but Katrina was feeling better already. She knew why she was here. She wasn't going to loose sight of that over some stupid high school memories.


She noticed Ali and Marcel chatting quietly off by themselves and couldn't help but feel a little loneliness creep in. Had everyone else stayed in contact except her? Had everyone else spoken to Cassie within the past week or so while Kat had barely even thought about the girl? Here we go again. Guilt and regret were side-by-side again in Kat's brain as she leaned against one of the wooden poles of the gazebo. God, why did this have to be so hard? Why couldn't I have just stayed in damn touch with her?

 

[Poe]

Marcel approached Ali before she had a chance to swallow down the feeling in her throat. Always there, always keeping an eye on her — but this was not like last time. When her father had died, Ali had thrown so much on him that she dragged him down with her. They had both been drowning in the pain that seemed never-ending, but with him standing before her now with nothing but those kind and understanding eyes — she knew she had changed. She was not the same little girl in high school who’d been blindsided by the evils the world managed to conjure. Now she knew that fairytales and happy endings were all just stories told to children to ease the blow. Life, real life, was brutal.


By the way Marcel had seemed to tire around his eyes, she could tell — he knew that too. Even his touch was a bit different, softer than it used to be, but his words were the same. You’re not okay. He tilted her chin up and she could not miss the intensity of his eyes. Let it out Ali. Ali let out a breath that sounded like a broken laugh, her eyes soft as they bore into Marcel’s. It was like an old dance and she’d never forgotten the steps. It was hard — finding real, honest love at the wrong time. She wondered what would be different between them now, as the air had changed. When they were younger, it was fast paced and electric, but now there was a subtle longing and a maturity that they’d never had before. Maybe she never stopped loving him — no, she knew she never did…but it was easier to swallow from a distance.


His arms were quick around her, pulling her into his embrace like falling into a memory. He still smelled like Marcel which was a strange thought, but Ali couldn’t seem to pull coherent thoughts together since the news of Cassie had hit her. Ali buried her face in the crook of his neck for a moment, a sad smile on her lips as she wished she could do what he asked. If there was anything she could let out, she would — but no matter how she wanted to scream and cry, she couldn’t. It wasn’t in her. Her bones felt far too tired for that.


Pulling back slightly, Ali traced his features with her fingertips as she tried to commit him to memory. She would need it once this was all over and she was still left behind. “I don’t know how I am,” she shrugged, her words soft and a deep sadness resonating through them though she tried to mask it. “You don’t have to be strong for the both of us, not now,” she said gently. Just like when they were in school, she pushed one of his stray pieces of hair back and smiled at him, basking in the moment of clarity he managed to give her even when she couldn’t figure out what to feel.

 

[JujuBee]

Marcel let Ali pull away from him and watched her intently like he’d always done since they’d first met. He’d always loved just looking at the beautiful woman he’d had the pleasure of growing up with only to have those short years of dating. Having her in his arms again was a bittersweet moment because he knew that once this funeral was done then just like the rest of them- Ali would be out of his life doing whatever it was she did.


He sighed, letting her trace his features. That was probably the most he’d get out of the woman. Better yet, why was he even doing this? They weren’t together. They hadn’t been for quite some times now. So why was it that as soon as the group got back together he immediately gravitated towards her? That wasn’t how it was supposed to go. They were supposed to have moved on- He was supposed to have moved on.


So why hadn’t he?


Why couldn’t he?


He forced a smile onto his face, flinching slightly when she pushed away his stray piece of hair as she’d done so many years ago. The emotions inside of him crashed and clanged, going to war with one another in the poor man. Slowly, Marcel pulled away from Ali and gave her a short nod and smile.


“I’m so proud of you for being able to be strong in this. We need strong people. Not that someone here is weak- No we- I like strong. Does that even make sense?” He mumbled, running a hand through his hair and frowning as he bit his lip.


“Great now I sound like an idiot.” He mumbled to himself as he took a step back from Ali. “Sorry, sorry, sorry. I didn’t mean to go into such a tangent. I apologize. Sorry.” He apologized multiple times, backing up to his seat and slowly sitting down. He turned away from Ali; looking at the others as he wondered how much longer he’d be here with them all to show just how much of an idiot he was.

 

[haydenly16]

Cody listened as Will whispered in her ear. "It is fucked up." She murmured, squeezing Will before pulling away from him. She ran her finger tips down the side of Will's face and smiled sadly at him. She ran her hand down his arm, squeezing his fingers gently before letting go and looking around the group. Everyone was solemn: sad and looking a little broken. She swallowed the lump in her throat, pushed her hair behind her left ear, grabbed her barely steaming drink from where she had set it down, and looked at the group again. She wiped the single tear from her eye, glancing around at the snowy ground around them. "We have to figure out what to do next." She murmured, breaking up the quietness. "Cassie would rip us all up one side and down the other if she knew we were sitting around here like we're meeting each other for the first time. We have to pull it together. For her family." Cody paused briefly. "And for her."