Spotine Jan 2, 2016 For my new year's resolution, I promise to stop correcting your terrible spelling and focus more on your horrific grammar.
For my new year's resolution, I promise to stop correcting your terrible spelling and focus more on your horrific grammar.
Spotine Dec 11, 2015 If a fat man tries to take you from your home on Christmas Eve, don't worry. I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.
If a fat man tries to take you from your home on Christmas Eve, don't worry. I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.
Spotine Dec 3, 2015 It takes real talent to choke on air and trip over nothing. I have both of these skills.
Spotine Oct 24, 2015 "I just can't reach out to tell you that I always wonder what you're up to." ~Tori Kelly
Spotine Oct 24, 2015 Destroy every memory of him, they said. Pretend like he doesn't exist. How can I, when he's everywhere I go and the only thing I think about
Destroy every memory of him, they said. Pretend like he doesn't exist. How can I, when he's everywhere I go and the only thing I think about
Spotine Oct 12, 2015 I'm in a relationship with two men; Ben and Jerry. They sit in my freezer when I don't need them.
Spotine Oct 7, 2015 Edward Elric: Because real men are under 5 feet tall, wear tight leather pants, and braid their silky hair.
Edward Elric: Because real men are under 5 feet tall, wear tight leather pants, and braid their silky hair.
Spotine Sep 28, 2015 "I just want to be friends." Translation: I never want to talk to you or see you again.
Spotine Sep 26, 2015 Friends ask you why you're crying. Best friends already have a shovel to burry the person that made you cry.
Friends ask you why you're crying. Best friends already have a shovel to burry the person that made you cry.
Spotine Sep 21, 2015 So guys taller than girls can date, girls and girls can date, guys and guys and date, but girls taller than guys can't date? I don't get it.
So guys taller than girls can date, girls and girls can date, guys and guys and date, but girls taller than guys can't date? I don't get it.
Spotine Sep 12, 2015 "All these years I'd thought being a spy was hard. Turns out being a girl is the hard part." ~Gallagher Girls
"All these years I'd thought being a spy was hard. Turns out being a girl is the hard part." ~Gallagher Girls
Spotine Sep 11, 2015 I wish my eyelashes were as dark as my soul and as long as the list of people I hate.
Spotine Sep 5, 2015 Fool! My legend began in the 12th century! You think you have the right to pick a number from 1-12?!
Spotine Sep 5, 2015 Fools? His legend began in the 12th century! You think you have the right to pick a number from 1-12?!
Fools? His legend began in the 12th century! You think you have the right to pick a number from 1-12?!
Spotine Aug 27, 2015 Boys almost never notice when a girl does her makeup special just for him. So why do girls do it?
Spotine Jul 5, 2015 Mom: Get off the computer! Me: No. Mom: At least open a window. Me: *opens window on safari*