Opinion things boys do that girls hate

[World crafter]

Hot air balloons.

Spending a lot to keep it afloat.

Hurhurhur

 

[SoundNinja4]

No, your prefference on how you date is up to you, toxic femininity/masculinity isint based on who you date, it's based on who you choose to be as a person, a person who strives to be societies frankly outdated view point (ie: musclebound meathead with a fancy sports car, says "alpha male" type stuff and hits on every single person at the bar...but in reality you would rather be at home watching documentaries or reading a book...but you wont because you believe that this is what you needto be....or you just ignore all feelings and firmly believe it's this way or the highway and continue to be that ass at the bar)

What if someone genuinely wants to be that musclebound meathead with a fancy sports car, says "alpha male" type stuff and hits on every single person in the bar? Is that still "toxic masculinity" or is "toxic masculinity" just being someone that you don't want to be because you believe you have to be a certain way?

Also I'm not sure if I phrased my question right earlier. I guess what I was trying to ask, was if you were told that your boyfriend can't be weaker then you are or else you're not a real woman, would that be "toxic femininity"?

 

[Midnightchan123]

What if someone genuinely wants to be that musclebound meathead with a fancy sports car, says "alpha male" type stuff and hits on every single person in the bar? Is that still "toxic masculinity" or is "toxic masculinity" just being someone that you don't want to be because you believe you have to be a certain way?

Also I'm not sure if I phrased my question right earlier. I guess what I was trying to ask, was if you were told that your boyfriend can't be weaker then you are or else you're not a real woman, would that be "toxic femininity"?

if you /really/ want to be that dude, then ok, thats your thing, doesnt make you any less of an ass, but thats on you.

I'll be honest, never heard of the term toxic femininity as an actual thing, but yeah, that is pretty damn toxic, if someone told me I couldnt date my boyfriend because he is smaller in size them I am, I'd be pretty upset, anyone can be toxic, if your boyfriend is weaker then you are, thats fine and should be ok.

 

[SoundNinja4]

if you /really/ want to be that dude, then ok, thats your thing, doesnt make you any less of an ass, but thats on you.

I'll be honest, never heard of the term toxic femininity as an actual thing, but yeah, that is pretty damn toxic, if someone told me I couldnt date my boyfriend because he is smaller in size them I am, I'd be pretty upset, anyone can be toxic, if your boyfriend is weaker then you are, thats fine and should be ok.

Well if you think toxic masculinity is a thing, I don’t see why toxic femininity wouldn’t be a thing. Otherwise, why call it toxic masculinity? Why not just call it toxic? I mean, if anyone can be toxic, why call it toxic masculinity on one end, but not toxic femininity on the other?

 

[SandraDeelightful]

Well if you think toxic masculinity is a thing, I don’t see why toxic femininity wouldn’t be a thing. Otherwise, why call it toxic masculinity? Why not just call it toxic? I mean, if anyone can be toxic, why call it toxic masculinity on one end, but not toxic femininity on the other?

Thank you! There's no reason it needs to be toxic masculinity, if there's no toxic feminity. Honestly, I don't really believe that it should be gendered. It should just be toxic behavior.

 

[Midnightchan123]

Well if you think toxic masculinity is a thing, I don’t see why toxic femininity wouldn’t be a thing. Otherwise, why call it toxic masculinity? Why not just call it toxic? I mean, if anyone can be toxic, why call it toxic masculinity on one end, but not toxic femininity on the other?

I dont know why toxic femininity doesn't exist, maybe because more feminine traits dont always lead to harmful situations? (just a guess, and they can lead to harmful situations) but, the reason why the term toxic masculinity does exist is because the behaviors associated with it are extremely harmful to everyone (I have a friend in the bahamas who has issues with his family because they force the negative stereotypes on him) especially for poc lgbt and other people of minorities because if you think that someone is beneath you based on nothing more then the color of their skin, or whom they happen to rub genitals with you have a huge problem, and it harms the people forced to conform to this stereotype.

 

[SoundNinja4]

I dont know why toxic femininity doesn't exist, maybe because more feminine traits dont always lead to harmful situations? (just a guess, and they can lead to harmful situations) but, the reason why the term toxic masculinity does exist is because the behaviors associated with it are extremely harmful to everyone (I have a friend in the bahamas who has issues with his family because they force the negative stereotypes on him) especially for poc lgbt and other people of minorities because if you think that someone is beneath you based on nothing more then the color of their skin, or whom they happen to rub genitals with you have a huge problem, and it harms the people forced to conform to this stereotype.

Masculine traits may lead to harmful situations more often than feminine traits, but masculine traits don't always lead to harmful situations either. Sometimes they actually prevent harmful situations. What negative stereotypes do they force on your friend? I'm not sure how skin color or lgbt comes into this?

 

[SoundNinja4]

Thank you! There's no reason it needs to be toxic masculinity, if there's no toxic feminity. Honestly, I don't really believe that it should be gendered. It should just be toxic behavior.

I completely agree. I think calling it toxic masculinity is toxic itself.

 

[SandraDeelightful]

I completely agree. I think calling it toxic masculinity is toxic itself.

I think that there are behaviors that are toxic, some are more prevalent in males, others, in females. I think it's better to call out those specific behaviors when we see them, rather gendering them just greats division.

 

[Midnightchan123]

Masculine traits may lead to harmful situations more often than feminine traits, but masculine traits don't always lead to harmful situations either. Sometimes they actually prevent harmful situations. What negative stereotypes do they force on your friend? I'm not sure how skin color or lgbt comes into this?

well, they force him to keep his emotions locked up, I've known him for about 7 years, and he's an emotional kind of guy.

and most people who buy in willingly to toxic masculinity are very often racist, homophobic and sexist, maybe not to extremes, but the minimum you can expect from these people are homophobic slurs to the slightly androgynous guy holding his wifes purse, regardless if they are gay or not ( a few good examples of toxic masculinity: POTUS Trump, batman (early comics he saw wonderwoman take on a large group of bad guys, come out victorious, offered an invitation to join the justice league and....stuck her as the secretary, yes, different times, but it is still one of the causes) I'll update the list later, bit busy tonight)

ALSO turns out toxic femininity is a thing....but it isint used like toxic masculinity is, I'll post a link to what I found, also, the term for (real) toxic femininity is benevolent sexism (males should be strong and violent=women must be effeminate and non violent)

Toxic femininity
Benevolent sexism
Toxic masculinity

(I'd find more examples from different sources, but laundry needs to be folded and things put away, forgive me for using one of the first results on google for now)

 

[SoundNinja4]

well, they force him to keep his emotions locked up, I've known him for about 7 years, and he's an emotional kind of guy.

and most people who buy in willingly to toxic masculinity are very often racist, homophobic and sexist, maybe not to extremes, but the minimum you can expect from these people are homophobic slurs to the slightly androgynous guy holding his wifes purse, regardless if they are gay or not ( a few good examples of toxic masculinity: POTUS Trump, batman (early comics he saw wonderwoman take on a large group of bad guys, come out victorious, offered an invitation to join the justice league and....stuck her as the secretary, yes, different times, but it is still one of the causes) I'll update the list later, bit busy tonight)

ALSO turns out toxic femininity is a thing....but it isint used like toxic masculinity is, I'll post a link to what I found, also, the term for (real) toxic femininity is benevolent sexism (males should be strong and violent=women must be effeminate and non violent)

Toxic femininity
Benevolent sexism
Toxic masculinity

(I'd find more examples from different sources, but laundry needs to be folded and things put away, forgive me for using one of the first results on google for now)

Well that's not a good thing. They shouldn't force him to keep his emotions locked up. I'm not sure I'd call that toxic masculinity. That's toxic parenting.
There may be many people with toxic behaviors that are racist, homophobic, or sexist, but I think to say that most people are those things is a stretch.

It says that Benevolent Sexism is a variety of sexism that is, on its surface, positive ("benevolent") toward women. Then my question is what is the term for the variety of sexism that is, on its surface, positive ("benevolent") toward men?

Toxic femininity is not "benevolent sexism". It is just the female gendered word for toxic masculinity.

 

[AnimeGenork]

When you ask out the guy you've liked practically your whole life and for some reason "I already have a girlfriend" is a foreign language to him

 

[World crafter]

Not sure if already having a girlfriend is a good excuse.

It is for fooling around tho.