Fantasy The Wonderverse (In Character)

[Trappy]

War. War never changes.

Every day is a new hell, fresh from the pits of our past graves. Our past sins. Our past selves. The demons of old have come to haunt us, to take us all, so that we may finally return to hell where we all belonged the moment we set foot upon this cursed earth, this godforsaken soil, this-

Skipping the edgy intro, welcome to the Wonderverse, guys.

Welcome to Randall, a continent fractured and divided by both jagged terrains and political powers, most noticeably, the rivalry and clash between the City- wait, no, the uhhh, Kidian? Sidian? Yeah, Cidian and Pletaia Dynasties. Emerging 16 generations before, the Cidian Dynasty had spread their domain to encompass the surrounding societies of the regions. Their banners marched across Randall as an unstoppable force, and further South, past the Crysis- no, wait- Krysios mountains to conquer the marshlands and wastes of Telmerin and its stubborn people. Before long, many, willingly or not, bowed to their dominion over the island continent and sang praises of their dominions.

Praises that were sung no more.

Under the rule of its current King Agress Cidian, now in his 72th year, the Kingdom is an empty husk of what it used to be while their influence and might a fraction of what they once achieved. To the South, the Telmerin dudes raised banners for an open rebellion against the crown, under the leadership of elected King Kasdra Pletaia (where do they even get these names?), a blight of the Cidian power. While there had been a few skirmishes, nutkicks and gutpunches here and there, tensions have been brewing as diplomatic efforts yielded minimal results, and while both families let pride gets the better of them, Randall is threatened to be plunged in war. Again. You know the drill.

Randall is also where the Rift opens, drawing folks from another plane who would come to be given the name 'Realworlders' by native denizens of the land. The most recent Rift, which occurred but a month ago, resulted in many Realworlders finding themselves amidst a brewing conflict, as they are both extensively sought after and hunted by both families. Apparently otherworldly knowledge and toasters make for good war-winning instruments.

So yeah, that's it so far. The Sidneys and the Platelets are at war, and Rannedahl is gonna see bloodshed again. Because of this setback, Realworlder Fridays have been moved to Mondays, and the chocolate crisps have been moved over to the Drinks section at your local foodstores. Thank you for tuning in to Realworld Readers. Next week's issue will cover the scheduled unscheduled cage match between the Brazilian can opener expert and Daryl the can expert.


Our story, however, begins much smaller. A new day arrives here in the fertile Eastern plains of Tar'shari, far beyond the influence of the rivalling dynasty as the Mother of Dawn brings her brilliant light and warmth to the humble town of Amson. Itself lying on the crossroads connecting various coastal port cities and the illustrious Elven metropolis of Syndus, this town came to prominence as a busy stop for various travelling merchants carrying wares from the sea and abroad. As the sun rises, the street comes to life with various vendors and carts hauling goods, while the people themselves walk about with purpose, all amidst the sounds of orders barking and overlapping shouts.

In the Northeastern portion of the town lies the Unterblok, a small, somewhat underdeveloped but comparably quieter part of Amson lies the Idle Bar. It is here that a number of wandering destinies slowly begin to intersect, including a small, recently-founded band of wanderers, adventurers and travelling swords.

Welcome to Amson. The day is yours.

 

[KairiNyaa]

Outside of the Idle Bar, a small green fellow lies in waiting, crouched. His back is turned away from all the hustle and bustle of the street. Instead, he is facing a small, dank, alleyway behind the bar. In his hand is what can only be described as nothing more than a stick. A rudimentary weapon for such a... backwards little creature.

The goblin's eyes dart around the shaded alley, as he watches something occasionally scutter between cover to cover. His breathes deepen as he prepares to lash out at his prey. The little rodent scurries toward the goblin, and as he begins executing his finishing blow, something disrupts him.

The goblin hisses out, his very, very unflattering face poking out from his very, very oversized mage hat. "Watch where you go!! Kazard is hunting street rat!" Kazard, as he was evidently named, was met with a couple glares from people nearby, but seemingly nothing more. He turned back toward the alleyway. As he hoped he might have another shot, he caught a glimpse of the street rat clambering into a small hole in an adjacent building.

"Gah!!!"

 

[Ac3]

The chill of the night still hung over the alley, the bloom of the morning somehow making the narrow pathway seem colder. Olin stood rigid, trying his best not to shiver in these final moments, lest he stain his boots. He stood maybe a foot from the wall, a ways down the alley, to not be a total eyesore as he relieved himself from the earlier night cap. Something about a row of chamber pots in a small room with no apparent sanitation just couldn't be trusted.

"Thanks for watching my back, Kaz." Olin's voice shook with the cold and his nerves. It was amazing how well alcohol helped one adapt to a new city, let alone an entirely new dimension, or whatever this was. Despite that, entrusting his vulnerability to a literal goblin seemed pretty insane, but if he didn't think about it too much he could relax. All caution had been thrown to the wind in only a month.

The rat skittered by, Olin suppressing a startled jump within an elaborate, high-legged attempt to zip up his jeans. Briefly it crossed his mind that his wardrobe would probably be fucked in another month or two, but the throb of his hangover pushed that worry to the back of his mind.

 

[thefinalgirl]

Maria wasn't happy with how silent it was, the cold night turning to a radiant sunrise was a pretty scene. The girl wondered on where she would go, roaming the streets with a small creature that she had when she was revived. She wore a long and dark hood to cover herself and her small beast that is inside her called, Leviathan. She knew that the world looked down upon undead creatures as evil but they too, had feelings.

"Where am I even going?" The girl asked as she looked at her surroundings, the boring town wasn't too special, it was average-looking in her eyes. It lacked in some kind of engagement for entertainment. She wondered on where to go as she had been freshly awoken from her slumber, she didn't know who revived her. She was looking for people to ask on where she was, she found a small goblin midget and a black haired man having a conversation.

"Please pardon for interrupting your little conversation but may I ask, what's the name of this city?" The girl held her hood tightly, trying to not show her unusual appearance to both of them. Her blood red eyes and her purplish skin was certainly odd for a normal undead being.

 

[KairiNyaa]

Kazard's prey had gotten away. That rat wouldn't be his dinner tonight, but Kazard sought revenge. He will eat this rat. But for now, the goblin flumped onto ground, and looked over to Olin. Staring at his human partner. Kazard felt friend was too strong. They were there to help each other, but Kazard felt no kinship with this human. They all looked the same to him.

He pocketed his pointy stick, and scooched himself against the same wall as Olin. His clothes were all already mangy and tattered, he cared very little if sitting on the gross alley floor ruined them more. Sitting there, he stuck his hand inside of his bag, and ripped something, a piece of paper with runes and writing all over it. He brought the sheet up to his mouth, and tore off the corner with his sharp teeth, chewing on the paper.

And then someone else was there. She had a strange scent. Keeping herself cloaked, Kazard felt untrusting of the person. He spit his chew up paper into his hand, and spoke toward them with a hiss. "Olin tell Kazard we in Amson! Now go! Leave us!" The goblin didn't seem keen on talking.

 

[Trappy]

Joe, Jun and Mira

The wooden wagon rocked with rhythm as it slowly made its way Eastwards towards the township of Amson on the cobblestone road. Three figures sat more or less idly on top, their hair blowing gently in the wind as a breeze washed over the open plain. Their distinctive apparels classified their respective roles of most ordinary travelling parties - a knight, a mage, and a rogue. The sun was going down behind the rolling hills as the strangers finally made it to their destination, approaching the Sunfall Gate to the West of Amson. Fresh from the open road, Amson will allow them a chance to restock on essential supplies and a moment of respite, as well as opportunies in the vibrant trade stop.

Before they came within sight of the townsguards, with her weapons sheathed and kept close by her side, the hooded rogue, Mira, brought her hand up to retrieve the particular doll mask, whispered a few incantation beneath her breath, and pulled down the hood. Wavy black hair flowed freely on her shoulder as her blue eyes carefully glanced about, eyeing the individuals at the gate, as well as passing bystanders. She wore the brightest smile as the wagon rolled closer towards the guards at the gate, and sounded the greeting she'd learned from her Realworlder companions.

"Hewwo hewwo hewwo~ and a good day to you! We are but weary travellers looking for a place to stay for the night!" Mira spoke swiftly, with a straight voice. The Realworlders she met said it was the standard greeting between Realworlders, and Joe seemed to agree.

Behind her, the white mage's blank face was all that was left of the broken-hearted girl. Her hands continuously sliding back and forth upon the surface of a platinum rune. The mage's messy white hair complemented her restless state, accompanied by the dark curves that formed under her drowsy, blue eyes. The girl cast her gaze into the distant, rolling horizon of greens and blues, while mumbling to herself non-stop. It was almost as if she had just returned from a war, and carried with her the scars of the unseeable. At least that's what the mage had seemed like from a brief glance, while the truth was far more grim - the destitution of an already-broke mage. While it was a common sight to see a peasant, whose capacity in life was far more harsh than hers, the white mage would digress. She had spent a year worth of her hard-earned treasury, along with what she could barter - all for a platinum rune that she had recently purchased in Xamber. Within her foreseeable future, the girl was weeping inside, as she would have to start over from scratch. The reclusive mage had become ever more paranoid as time went on, holding tightly onto the platinum object with great care. Before long, a voice broke the truce of silence among the trio.

"Hey how do I open this land mine? I've been banging it against my leg for an hour now and it's still not open. And now my leg kinda hurts, and I don't know why."

"W-what the-... What are you doing with that thing?!? You're gonna get us all killed! Stop!" the mage shouted, as she threw her hands towards the knight, in an attempt to stop him.

"Oh okay." He stoutly replied, ignoring Jun's flailing hands as he promptly placed the landmine on his seat, then sat on it with a thud from his armor. "Guess I'll sit on it for a while."

"Why you-..." Jun replied, as she continues to flail her arms about like a child, before retracting her hands.

"You are lucky. I will spare you this time..." she said haughtily, despite evidence of her hands being beet-red from barely touching the knight's armor.

"Seriously though you guys, be careful with that thing, I can't identify it, so we should probably get it to someone who could." Mira chimed in "It'd be the lamest party wipe ever if you somehow accidentally triggered some sort of catalysm from that dish thing."

"What is that thing anyways? How did you even get it, Joe?"

"I don't know. It tastes like fish, and I traded 4 silvers to a rabbit for it. Seemed like a fun thing, you know, like a frisbee. But it's too heavy to fris and not aerodynamic enough to bee. So I got nothin' on what it is."

Mira chuckled, while Jun squinted her eyes out of disbelief, as what was left of her hope for an answer was completely dispelled.

"I don't even know why I bothered to ask..."

With some visible confusion from the opposing party, but without complications, the wagon eventually made it past the inspecting guards at the Sunfall Gate and carried the curious trio towards the Idle Bar, where they were going to fill their stomachs with proper foods and spend the night.


Morning came, with smells of burning stokes of firewood and smoked ribs filled the air, as the Idle Bar's visitors tended to their needs for another rising day in Amson. Strangers and familiars of the rugged town mingled among each other, casting aside their differences for a square meal. Colorful canvases of the merchant stands unfurled upon dawn's approach, as the populace made their way down the crowded street. Within the Idle Bar, two particular figures sat within the darker corner of the building. A mage resided within the comforts of her seat, armed with the fires of her glaring eyes and the tight grasps upon their cards, the hooded rogue standing right behind her as if to back her courage. Across the table, 3 more individuals shot their eyes across their opponents and the cards tight in their hands, their eyes fixed upon one another, as if making ready to plunge into the calls of arms. A mixed pile of seemingly copper and silver rested between all of them in the middle of the table, a treasure hoard ready to be claimed.

 

[quadraxis201]

As Kirron approached Amson, he retrieved a small piece of parchment paper from one of his coat pockets-- a map that one of his more adventurous colleagues had given to him as a gift in order to benefit him on his journey. "Now, let me see..." The dwarf murmured to himself as he pulled down the largest of the attached lenses on his spectacles to get a better view of the East corner of the map. "Aha, so I am in the correct place. Excellent. I must thank Birke sometime in the future for giving me this map."

He crossed the threshold of the town and began examining his surroundings, making his way toward a building which was apparently known as the Idle Bar. It was certainly not as elaborate as the Clockwork City he came from, but it seemed a humble town, and Kirron had to remember that things were quite different above the ground. For one, the Sun would rise in the sky on the dawn of a new day, as opposed to the typical ambient lighting of lanterns and liquid rock. For another, there weren't stoic mechanical men walking about the streets, double-bladed axes in their metal hands. Kirron wanted to visit the blacksmith of this town, but his thoughts were drawn away when he heard the shouting of a goblin nearby. Kirron raised the magnification lens he had used moments before back into place and stowed his map away as he approached the trio that had gathered. A human, a goblin in a mage's outfit, and a third, cloaked individual-- quite the motley crew, made perhaps even more so by the sudden appearance of an aged dwarf with a pipe resting gently at the side of his mouth. "Beg pardon, but... would you perhaps know where the marketplace is in this humble town? I've a desire to examine their wares." Kirron asked them, dusting himself off as he entered the alleyway.

Interacting with:
Ac3
KairiNyaa
thefinalgirl

 

[KairiNyaa]

Olin, Kazard, Maria, and Kirron
The girl was just annoyed at the small midget and proceeded to raise her voice, but remembered that there were people nearby, she started to calm down and look at the green goblin. She was about to make the goblin's ears bleed, but she decided against it, for another man was present on the site.

The goblin stared at the girl for a few moments, before grumbling and defering to Olin.

The clutch of his hangover started to tighten, but Olin stood fast in the presence of strangers. "Yes, um.. like my friend said, we're in Amson."
Olin shot a look over to Kazard, noting the Goblin's attitude. He'd have to find that rat if he was going to settle this.

"I see." The girl said as a cold wind blew by her, almost revealing her face but she pulled her hood tighter, her red eyes could be slightly seen as the wind blew for a split second, but it was eventually hidden by the shadow of the cloak. She didn't want to scare away any humans thanks to her looks, if she could even manage to make her cloak stay.

Kirron, having entered Amson without any prior knowledge of the town, sought directions on where to go. "Beg pardon," He began as he raised the large lens back into place with the others. "Would any of you happen to know where the marketplace might be? I seek to examine the wares they may have for sale." It did seem a tad unusual for him to be asking such a motley crew how to navigate a simple town, but the fact that a dwarf had just approached a human, goblin, and... whoever the third, cloak-wearing person was, didn't make it any less strange.

Another one. And Kazard could recognize that disgusting, earthy smell anywhere. It was a dwarf. Kazard didn't want to stick around for this. Olin could deal with them. The goblin was already frustrated, and now there was a dwarf. He scowled at the newcomer, growling and raising his hand, throwing it down with a yelp. "Smoke!!!" A sudden plume of smoke covers Kazard, as he scurries away on all fours quickly, heading for the entrance of the Idle Bar.

Maria stared at the small green goblin, wondering what thought ran across his mind. She wasn't used to seeing such a creature in public as in her town, they would be treated as beasts and would be slain on sight but they weren't too bad, others were kept pets. She received a goblin as a pet but proceeded to give it back to her father. She wanted a small kitten, not a green midget. Nonetheless, the family cooked it for a tasty serving of goblin ham braised in a caramel sauce.
A small dwarf entered the scene, she only noticed him now since he was quite a short fellow, but she responded with, "I believe it's just down that street, take a left from there and march straight ahead. You'll find it."

Kirron was understandably annoyed by the goblin's sudden decision to create a smokescreen in order to escape. Well, that was certainly rude, he thought. Thankfully, however, the cloaked individual had decided to answer his question. "I appreciate it. At the very least, you have the decency to answer a question without creating a noxious cloud and frantically scurrying off like some common rodent." There seemed to be something curious about the girl that had given him his directions, but... he could not decipher just what, exactly. There was also the matter of the human that seemed to have been accompanying the goblin-- he had yet to speak, and so Kirron waited to see if he would reply in any way.

 

[KairiNyaa]

Kazard entered the rather crowded Idle Bar. There were many people and scents in here. He could easily blend in and walk around with arousing much suspicion. He looked around, surveying the area. He saw no signs of the rat that had fled... but something else did catch his eye. There was a rather large group of people playing a rather large pot. Surely, they wouldn't mind if some of their coins went to Kazard's cause? After all, those shinies would be very tempting to any goblin who laid their eyes on them. It would be a disservice to goblin-kind!

And so he thought of an idea. If he could get them all to look away, he could get the money scotfree. He could probably grab enough to purchase a book or two for eating/reading. Kazard was a mighty wizard, and mighty wizards have mighty spells. Kazard focused for moment, and uttered a quiet "Confetti...", leading to a sudden burst of colored flakes of papers popping out of nowhere with a slight pop, seemingly grabbing the attention of everyone!

He quickly reached his hand up to the table, and grabbed a handful of coins of different colors. As he was pocketing his earnings, he looked back up, just as a patron turned and saw him with a handful of coins being slipped into his pouch. Kazard did not get away with it. The patron started demanding the coins be returned. The others turned to face him as well, and Kazard knew that he could either, A: try to run away, or B: return most of the coins.

Kazard was short. He could not run very fast. Option B was the safest option. He reached his hand back into the pouch with a grumble, and pulled out a handful, making sure to try and leave the single gold coin and a few coppers. He returned all 4 silver, as well as 5 of the copper, leaving him with a gold and 3 copper. Grumbling, he looked at the patrons and spoke, "Apologiesssss," hissing out the final syllable.

 

[Kabboom]

Joe was still enjoying himself. Relatively. Some small rat creature just tried to take dosh from the pot, and got caught in the act, but that didn't matter to him. He was still so perplexed about that landmine he found. Normally, they'd make a boom noise and he'd find himself on his ass, but this one doesn't react at all. Maybe landmines can sense when he's not aware of them? Those are some smart landmines, then, since most of the times, Joe isn't even aware of himself. Weird.

But as he sat on his landmine (metaphorically and literally), a stranger approached. He made some squeaky noises as he trudged on over to the lumbering super-armored man, shrouded in a cape. Joe wouldn't have paid any attention to him other than acknowledging his existence, but this one did something to him. Normally, weird mysterious strangers shrouded in capes only gifted him trinkets, fish, and smelly money, but this guy had a greater idea. How did he know Joe was thinking of using a knife to pry open the landmine? So generous of him, although the guy needs to work on his delivery; the knife went into Joe on the pointy end.

That was kind of him to tastefully stress-test his armor, but the fun is coming to an end. This clown just met his matchstick. Handily grabbing the landmine, the firstborn of the Mackayleylough family swung it hard aimed at the assailant's face, only for him to miss entirely. Thankfully his other hand grabbed a buckler shield and followed up with a falcon punch to the noggin, putting blood on the knifeman's face and throwing him backwards, although still on his feet.

Joe charged at him for further fisticuffs, as crossbow bolts flew in through the windows. Seems there were more folks waiting for this fight.

Joe's HP: 31 (took 1 damage)
Bandito's HP: 2 (took 3 damage)

 

[Trappy]

Mira
The slow game of cards was quickly wrapped up as soon as the usual idle silence of the bar was shattered when crossbow bolts came whizzing in from outside. Out of instinct, Mira tackled the stool Jun was currently sitting on and they both came down onto the floor, just before wo of the patrons who were at the table immediately went tumbling backwards with bolts sticking out from their heads and blood pooling beneath them.

"Who are these people?!" The dark elf called out, glancing about and trying to locate her other companion. It didn't take her long to notice the bulky Realworlder in full plate armour, currently wrestling with some individual. Joe went in and scored one good, solid punch with his buckler, almost knocking the wind out of this individual, who reeled back, looking bloodied, though still standing. On the ground, and behind cover from the windows, The girl reached for her daggers, and threw them at the aggressive stranger who were swinging his tiny blade at big Joe. Still in surprise and panic from the sudden ambush by gods-know-who, her first throw fell low, clattering under the table Joe was at, while the second one struck the assailant right in the middle of his back, causing him to jolt and let out a painful gasp for air, before falling of his knees, leaning against the table, heavy and lifeless.


In the small alley behind the Idle Bar, Kirron, Olin and Maria see a dozen of redundantly concealed individuals suddenly stop just outside the establishment in a column, before turning, almost in unison, towards the quaint pub, while a couple others scattered around, seemingly to secure a perimeter. Bystanders begin to flee or hide from the site as the cloaked men brought up light crossbows from beneath their clownish cloaks, and fired in volleys into the Idle Bar, shattering the windows inwards. Screams and shouts can be heard from inside, and so far, the assailants seem uninterested in the trio.

They maintained the line of crossbows and kept on firing for a few minutes, then the guarding couples drew their blades - a collection of shortswords and machetes, and give some form of signal to the crossbowmen, who ditch the weapons and proceed to also draw blades, before the group come charging into the Idle Bar, leaving two standing watch outside.


Mira dived towards the corpse, retrieving her daggers as well as the slain assailant's blade and crawled underneath Joe's table, before calling out "Jun! Do your thing! Bamf us away or something!"

The volley of bolts eventually came to a halt, before - CRACK! - the heavy wooden door behind the bar flung open as a handful of uniformed individuals stumbled in, blades at the ready.

Mira's HP: 32 (+2 due to 2 layers of leather armour)
Bandito's HP: -3 (took 5 damage)=> Slain.

Interacting: Pilgrim59 Kabboom KairiNyaa
Mentioned: (as DM): quadraxis201 thefinalgirl Ac3

 

[Pilgrim59]

The White Mage
Jun

HP: 29/29

Location: Idle Bar, Amson
Interactions:
Mira ( Trappy ), Joe ( Kabboom )
Mentions: N/A

​

"Who are these people?!"

"I'm a scroll-craftsman, not a wanted hitman! W-why are they aiming for me too?! Hey, rascals! Aim for the guy in full armor! Not me!!"

The white mage stuttered a little, having hugged the ground at the behest of her Elven companion. Following up on Joe and Mira's counterattacks, Jun too, attempted to take a swing at one of the aggressor. She hurled a water jug at the militia, only to be met with a stern and provoked face - she missed her target, at point blank range. The jug found its destination in one of the men's face, barely bruising him. Despite her minuscule success to actually hit someone, the mage was found guilty in her act of defense. Her eyes narrowed, waving at the men apologetically, before throwing herself behind the bar's counter, barely making it with a few crossbow bolts nailing the wooden structure. The mage knew better, yet still conceded to her instincts, and now she was in the thick of it. It was barely a day pass, and the impoverished mage had found her life of troubles in Randall renewed in its course - evermore tormented. A voice called out to her, as she discerned herself from her whimpered state.

"Jun! Do your thing! Bamf us away or something!"

"It may be late to say this, but I skipped the teleportation class. I'm sowwy!!" Jun exclaimed out of panic.

Although she was earnest for one of the few moments in her life, she was met with disappointed looks from Mira and Joe. The white mage dust herself off from the ground and conjured up a small whirlwind of red surges, of which had embellished the fluid movement of her stance gracefully. Jun chuckled maniacally, instilling a certain sense of fear and intimidation within the group of thugs. She took in the sight of their fear, confidently acknowledging her dominant presence within the bar. Of course, this was seasoned with a bit of egotism and eccentricity from the mage, but she would digress.

"Behold the power of your neighborhood's White Mage! Tremble before the flames of the Ancient One's Rage! Let's get today's bread. I call upon the Red Leads!" Jun chanted, as she thrust her hands forth, as the surge of red flames breezed from her hands.

The aggressors stood in silence, slightly lowering their weapon, with some scratching their heads as Jun stood before them stunned. The mage's simplest spell, one that she had practically used primarily throughout her life in Randall was all but a warm breeze that barely nudged the counter's glasses.

"Uh... I'mma... take my leave. Be right back! Teehee!"

Jun smiled embarrassingly with a peace sign, as she slowly descended into cover. Tucking herself within the confines of her cover behind the counter, what was left of the mage's pride was all but extinguished, like her recent display of the simplest cantrip. A few more crossbow bolts found its way into the planks of the wooden counter.

"I'm sowwyyyy guys!!" she wailed from behind the counter.

 

[Kabboom]

"Time to get schwifty!" bellowed the super-armored man as more assailants revealed themselves. With the crossbow bolts and the assassin circus showing up on cue, this must be a coordinated attack, intended to shock the target and make them unable to counter effectively, achieving the element of surprise. A surprise coordinated attack. A scotack.

Undeterred, Joe drew his kite shield out along with his buckler, and advanced at the knifeman, stopping only when the bozo fell down lifeless, credit to Mira, the Mackayleylough firstborn stood still, just long enough to eat 3 crossbow bolts. Big meaty thuds echoed throughout the already loud bar as high-speed projectiles crashed against tough steel, punching three stout holes in Joe's brand-spankalanking-new kite shield. That's as far as they got, however; the bolts were lodged into the shield. Then the shooting stopped.

But then the back door swung open, and Joe found some new joy in his life. Four banditos squeezed through the gap, with half of 'em armed with swords, and the other two with axes in each hand. On instinct, Joe charged at the sword folks. One of them got a swing off at him, merely glancing off his buckler as he swung directly at one guy's face, which proceeds to miss entirely. Not completely done with his attack, Joe followed through his momentum, hurling his kite shield horizontally with a backhand swing, scraping the tip of the assassin's head as he ducked underneath it. An axe guy took a swing at him too, which deflected off of his normal armor. Then the battle continues.

literally no one got damaged

Trappy Pilgrim59

 

[KairiNyaa]

Kazard, still sulking over having to return his ill-gotten gold, went back to eying up the bar. It looked like a bar-fight was about to break out, nothing special. But then, in an explosion of chaos, a heavy stream of crossbow bolts flowing in through the windows.

Kazard jumped back, looking around the bar quickly. It seemed the poker game was abandoned. And with it, the pot. Keeping his head down, he approached the table again, repeatedly sweeping off coins into his pouch, filling it to the brim with precious metals.

Kazard, his pouch heavy and instinctual greed satisfied, crouched down low, ducking underneath a table. He had his hand up, prepared to launch a mighty fireball if anyone had tried to grab or attack him. Kazard couldn't help but chuckle, feeling the heavy sack sitting at his side.

 

[quadraxis201]

Right as Kirron was about to follow the directions that the mysterious girl had given him, all pandemonium seemed to break loose. A group of cloaked men had gathered outside of the tavern where the goblin had ran off to before letting loose a series of crossbow volleys directly through the windows of said establishment. Then, they drew their weapons and charged inside, leaving two of their comrades to watch the entrance. /Well, it was a quiet, peaceful town. Leave it to a band of ruffians to spoil everything./ Kirron thought to himself. /The marketplace can wait... I have to do something about this. As rude as that goblin was... a minor incident is certainly not worth leaving him to be shot./

He reached for his blacksmithing hammer that rested on his belt. This artfully engraved tool was normally reserved for pounding and reworking metal, but it certainly wasn't outside the realm of possibility that it could be used as a blunt (yet emergency) weapon. Kirron raised a gloved finger to his lips as he traversed through the back alley and eventually behind one of the posted sentries.

With a swing of his hammer, Kirron unfortunately missed his initial attack, prompting the guard and his associate to turn around and acknowledge the dwarf's presence. Swinging their swords, one of them managed to land a powerful hit on Kirron, who shed some blood onto his coat, adding a spot of red to the otherwise black collection of oil stains. "Confound it!" He exclaimed. "So much for that..."

Kirron's HP: 14/19

Sentry A's HP: 5/5

Sentry B's HP: 5/5

 

[thefinalgirl]

When Maria gave directions to the small man, a commotion proceeded to break out within the town. A group of cloaked figures entered the bar and started it. This made Maria startled but her beast, Levi, wasn't startled but instead, was energized and proceeded to drag her. "Levi?! What are you doing? Run!" The girl frantically tried to run but her serpent wanted to go to the rumble within the bar. She had no choice but to follow her serpent's wishes, if they were to separate, her head would start to leak blood. Either way, she proceeded to run within it's alleyway.

She had a small dagger with her, she proceeded to hold it in her hand and equipped it. It was certainly a weak weapon but, at least she had some form of weapon to damage foes with. She removed her cloak and revealed herself within the dark corridor. Maria's red eyes locked onto a weird looking man. He saw the dwarf from earlier getting slashed by him.

Levi proceeded to bite the man, it was a total miss since he just grabbed the man's shortsword. There was a struggle but the man grabbed his sword back, pulling one of Levi's tooth. Some blood was spilled but it wasn't affecting the serpent. Maria tried to slash the man but she missed them. It was quite embarrassing to miss your strikes against an enemy since it proved how weak you were. She started to sing, a ballad of sadness. The man whom she was targeting proceeded to formed tears in his eyes but he was slightly resisting it. The man became immobilized by his emotions.

Maria's HP: 23/23

Sentry B: Immobilized by 1 turn!

 

[Trappy]

Mira

"Hey, it's alright! You're smart, your spells will be helpful later!"

Mira called out to her caster friend, as she crawled out of her hiding as soon as big Joe charged at the aggressive new faces, shields swinging around. The girl got up to her feet, prepared the daggers, aimed and threw them at the thug next to the one Joe was swinging at. The first dagger went wide, however, one did manage to hide itself planted in the cloaked figure's left thigh, causing him to stagger slightly and let out a painful grunt. Mira retrieved the recently slain assailant's knife and threw it at the same thug as well, wanting to eliminate one danger in her companion's vicinity. The makeshift shiv hit the hide on the armoured upper torso of the individual and snapped in half on impact, seemingly already suffered damages from repeated strikes on Joe's durable armour plates.

"Hmph." The dark elf let out an agitated grunt as she crouched for cover behind a table, retrieving her sling and three small pebbles. Muttering a few words of incantation under her breath, the pebble in her palm warmed up and glowed with a dim blue light, signifying the arcane influence taking place. Mira breathed, watching legs from under the table, and was priming to take a shot, when she noticed a small, robed figure, green-skinned and clutching what seemed to be a heavy sack, cowering beneath a nearby table.

"Huh...?" The elf stared at the goblin-like figure, wearing an inquisitive look.

Mira: 32 / 32 HP (+2)
Thug 1: 5 / 5 HP
Thug 2: 2 / 5 HP
Thug 3: 5 / 5 HP
Thug 4: 5 / 5 HP

Interacting: Pilgrim59 KairiNyaa
Mentioned: Kabboom

 

[KairiNyaa]

Kazard looked over, seeing someone who had a similar idea. He looked over at them suspiciously, watching them throw daggers at the thug, before they finally settled into cover and stared at him. Kazard felt a quick angry glance was enough to make her leave him be.

Still elated over the opputunistically taken (see: stolen) wealth and distracted by the knife-thrower, Kazard didn't immediately notice one of the thugs turning towards where Kazard was hiding. Having been granted cover by the table, Kazard had enough time to react and launch his most powerful spell at the attacker.

Kazard suddenly shouted, a shrieking incantation, "Fireball!!!" Flame sprouted from his palm, forming itself into a large orb of intense heat. He threw the fireball foreward with as much strength as a little green man can.

The orb struck the thug square in the chest, consuming him with a intense heat, practically incinerating the attacker. "Haha!" Kazard celebrated his attack, clapping, and turned toward the thug who had shifted their focus to the other table, after being stabbed by a flying blade.

He ran out from under the table, bradishing his pointy stick, and tried to leap at the thug and plant his stick into him. The thug turned, making Kazard miss and hit the ground. The thug tried to get his revenge, turning his back to table-girl and going for a slash at Kazard. Whether it was due to Kazard's small size or simple poor luck, the thug whiffed with his sword, striking the air next to the goblin.


Kazard: 26/26
Thug 1: 5/5
Thug 2: 2/5
Thug 3: -9/5
Thug 4: 5/5

 

[Kabboom]

"Skidaddle skidoodle, your hand now noodle!" Joe continued his tirade of valiant insults at the buffoons crashing this party. Swinging his kite shield hard forward, he gave the sword assassin a good push, albeit blocked with his weapon. Swatting his buckler to the side, he managed to create some distance for himself between him and the other sword assassin, before using said space to make a schwifty maneuver indeed: swinging his kite shield full force over to swordman 2, punching him hard in the everywhere. The man stumbled backwards but mostly intact.

Taking no time, swordman 1 lurched forward, delivering two swift cuts to Joe's back, but glancing off the man's thick hide. As Joe swung back to face both his shields against the two assailants, swordman 2 jumped in with a swing that led into a thrust, thankfully fended off using the kite shield. As a fireball from nowhere incinerated one of the axe guys, the second axeman, limping with one of his legs bleeding from a knife, bore down on Joe hard with two axes, the other one quickly picked up from the pile of ash in the corner of the room.

A swift maneuver blocked one axe with Joe's buckler, but the other one bore down onto his elbow joint with enough force to crack the first layer of armor. It also hurt a lot. Pushing the axeman backwards, Joe shrugged off the pain. He's fought mudcrabs tougher than these clowns.

Joe's HP: 28 (took 3 damage)

 

[Vyseryx]

Figaro; Amson, Unterblok, proximity of Idle Bar
„Pardon! Sorry! Excuse-mooooi!” Figaro was moving past the humble people of Amson, trying to slip between them as fast as possible, while also not beheading anyone with nine feet of steel and wood, that served him as a weapon. His two pursuers were right on his tail, and Figaro could hear their screams just behind him, prompting him go even faster.

And it was supposed to be such a nice day. Just a short moment ago, Figaro was enjoying himself with a peaceful nap in the random sun spot on of the low ledge somewhere in the Unterblok. But his sweet dreaming about naked dryads dancing between oaks was rudely interrupted, when he felt his hair being pulled. To his dismay, Figaro awoken to the sight of two girls, weaving colourful string and beads into his long, white hair.

Gently saying “Please don’t” was of no effect, so Figaro was currently running away as quickly as possible from the two little gremlins and their shenanigans. The catfolk boy darted out of the narrow turn, nearly bumping into the cart stuck at street, and quickly scanned the surroundings. Few houses and alleys, but no good places to hide. Unless…

Figaro’s eyes darted between two houses standing close to each other, and his decision was immediate. He jumped between the buildings and put one of his legs on the basis of the wooden wall. Catfolk looked upwards and tightened his muscles. In a series of swift leaps, he bounced between the walls of two houses, quickly gaining altitude with every move, until he ended up on rooftop of one of them.

He then lied down flat on the slate, even hugging his ear down, making sure he was almost invisible from the street level. Then and only then, he gathered his courage and looked down very carefully. Two girls, both not even ten, appeared shortly after, screaming something unintelligibly about cats and frantically looking for the escapee. Fortunately, those monsters weren’t particularly smart and they didn’t think of looking upwards. After some heated exchange, two girls decided that Figaro had run away and turned back disappointed, prompting a long sigh from the boy.

Figaro sat up and run fingers through his hair, feeling of few colour strings already put in there. They were pulling his hair and he needed to pick them away from there, as fast as possible.

He was already pondering how to use his double glaive as a cutting knife without killing himself in the process, when his eyes perked up, picking up weird noises from the distance. He heard scraping of metal dragged against metal, shattering window and screams of many people. Those were all sounds of fight.

Figaro’s curiosity instantly took over him. He started jumping between the rooftops, keeping balance with combination of his cat-like agility and Moonglaive’s weight and quickly made his way towards the source of commotion.

Scene that showed to his eyes was definitely unlike anything he had seen in the city before. A group of thugs was storming through the door of a bar. Outside of it, a very short man, perhaps a dwarf, armed with hammer was just getting slashed. And next to him a small violet skinned girl, who was being approached by another thug. The scene before him reminded Figaro of a pack of predators surrounding their pray. Separating their victims and catching the weak ones to feed on their flesh. And in moments like this, he had remembered his master’s words:

“It is by nature’s design, that weak fall prey to the strong. There is no point in trying to defy this order. If a doe allows itself to be surrounded by wolves, then it shall be eaten, and the circle of life will be… Figaro? Figaro? Are you listening to me?”

“DIE!!!” Figaro leaped off of the rooftop with a sudden somersault. Moonglaive whizzed, as it cut through air with deadly momentum, just before cat-boy reached the level of paralyzed aggressor’s head. The man was currently very sad, but Moonglaive was about to change it. Arguably for worse.

A flat part of a blade rammed into aggressor’s head with a force of a war hammer, knocking him out cold instantly. Figaro landed on the ground gracefully, just before the man’s body fell down. He was not moving at all, but just to be sure, catboy approached him and kicked him gently between the legs. As thug remained still, Figaro gave out a satisfied purr and turned to the girl.

Everything about her was wrong. Her eyes were in an unnatural red colour, her skin boasted sickly violet shade, and her scent, scent of the undead, irritated Figaro’s nostrils. But, more than anything…

“Oh my stars!” Figaro’s eyes started sparkling with glee. He dropped Moonglaive, clasped his hands and he leaned towards the girl. “You are so adorable! Like a walking blueberry!”


Figaro - HP: 30/30
Sentry B: (Functionally) dead

Interacted: thefinalgirl

 

[quadraxis201]

Kirron was anticipating another two-on-one attack from the sentries, but all of a sudden, something happened that made him leap back a foot or two-- a bony snake had suddenly grabbed hold of one of the sentries' weapons. "Good heavens!" Kirron exclaimed in shock. The snake had failed to strip the sentry of his weapon, instead losing a tooth. Nevertheless, Kirron was surprised to see the cloaked girl from earlier once more, this time with a serpentine companion. "I had a feeling there was something special about you, but... my, this is quite the surprise!" He was able to get a better look at her this time. /Dark purple skin and red eyes... could it be that...?/ Kirron pondered, but before he could inquire about what it was he wanted to know, the strange girl began to sing a melancholy song that resulted in the sentry losing his ability to move. He appeared to be paralyzed in a fit of emotions.

It was not long, however, before the sentry was suddenly assaulted from above by yet another curious individual-- this time, a young man who had what appeared to be cat ears and a particularly fluffy tail emerging from his backside, armed with a wooden glaive. The sentry was rendered unconscious in the instant the flat side of the man's weapon collided with the sentry's head. With one of the sentries out of commission for the time being, his companion was now without backup and more vulnerable to attack. Kirron gave a slight smirk before swinging his hammer a few times at the lone sentry. Two of his strikes had connected and dealt a good deal of damage, first to the sentry's head, then his chest, putting a quick end to him. Having vanquished his foe, Kirron turned to Maria and Figaro. "You two came at just the right moment! I truly must thank you both for your assistance." He said, holding onto his spectacles with two fingers and slightly dipping his head in a polite gesture. "I must admit, while I can most certainly do it, I am not one to openly engage in close-quarters battle like that. If anything, the reason I was so quick in trying to take these ruffians down was because... well, I suppose you two have seen-- and heard-- the reason for yourselves. I could not stand idly by and let this town be assaulted, regardless of whether or not I had just arrived." Kirron explained. "I have sustained some damage, but... it is nothing debilitating. If the situation should arise that I must continue fighting, I will do so with greater care, rest assured."

Kirron's HP: 14/19

Sentry A has been slain from 8 damage dealt by Kirron.

Interacting with:
thefinalgirl
Vyseryx

 

[Kabboom]

"Enough talk! Die now! Boop!" screeched one of the thugs as they swung their sword hard enough to swat Joe's buckler out of his hand, leaving him with only half the protection he needs. Taken aback by this sudden turn of events, the crooks advance and pen him into the walls, each and every one of them throwing out devastating attacks at him. The bleeding axe-guy swings both axes downward, which Joe failed to block with his shield, and as such, suffered a splitting concussion on his left shoulder from the brute force. Grinding metal chattered in his ears, he leaned inwards into the wall.

"Aah, please, stop, call an ambulance!" He begged. The assassins were boggled for a moment, which was precisely the time he needed to reach for his mace and riposte the axe man. One bap to the hands, and a bing onto the brain, and down he goes. Rallying himself, he continued his tirade. "But not for me!"

Joe: 23/32 (took 5 damage)
Thug 2: -1/5 (thoroughly ded im afraid)

 

[Trappy]

Mira
Mira watched, as a tiny bead of crimson flame sprouted from the green-skin's palm and shot towards one of the thugs. Suddenly, there was a blast of heat and brightness, causing the dark elf and a few other witnessing patrons, whose eyes had been accustomed to the dim lighting of the interior of the Idle Bar to squint and cover their eyes, as the little sprite of flame exploded into a fireball, completely engulfing the thug whose scream was drowned out by the loud explosion. When Mira came to, she could feel the heat still lingering on her face, and the aforementioned thug was no more. The blast left singed a portion of the wall the stranger was standing in front of, and her keen elven sight could barely make out a shape amongst the burn marks, seemingly the only thing left on this realm of the unfortunate assailant. "An impressive demonstration of arcane prowess!" Beads of sweat began to form on her temples out of amazement . . . or the heat as she uttered, though invisible under the illusionary visage the dark elf was maintaining.

The elf loaded the glowing pebble into her sling, stood up from the table she was hiding behind, and carefully took aim at one of the strangers, confident that the foes were thoroughly distracted by the green-skin and big Joe's demonstrations. The first shot bounced off a thick part of his hide armour, though certainly succeeded in capturing the masked individual's attention, who as he turned, revealed a machete and what seemed like a meathook in his hands. With a quick succession of 2 more shots and slight panic, Mira's pebbles both hit his stomach region this time, and the thug went down after letting out a painful grunt. Picking another pebble from a pouch on her waist and charged it up, Mira called over to the last man standing, who was armed with a short blade and dagger, the same uniform mask over his face and was backing up, visibly shocked as allies tumbled around him. "Drop your weapons, or become charred cookie! See what happened to the other one?!"

Thug 1: -1/5 (Slain by Mira - Pebbleshot)
Thug 2: -2/5 (Slain by bigJoe - Mace)
Thug 3: -9/5 (Slain by Kazard - evaporated by Fireball)
Thug 4: 5/5

KairiNyaa

 

[Kabboom]

True enough, the last thug was all out of friends, and full of fiends. With his back against the wall, and the doors and windows too far away, the assassin was as good as dead unless he complied with the dark elf. Steadily, he lowered his hands, still not letting go of his sword, and reached up to his cowl. Pulling it backwards, he revealed his ghastly visage.

Wait what the hell?

It's a clown.

Wait, are you sure this is how it goes? This can't be right. Lemme look at the script.

What? Aw hell, no, you can't be serious. Oh, and he's squeezing his big red nose too? It makes a freaking honk noise??????

Okay then. Oh and about 10 other guys show up in the bar. They look exactly like clowns now, colorful clothes and makeup and big-ass shoes on and all. They seem to be armed with mundane tools; spoons, sporks, spades, pillows, brooms, a hand grenade, and wooden sporks. They prepare themselves for combat as they encircle the vastly outnumbered occupants and-

They actually can't fight for shit. Ah well. At least the clowns look funny.

Welcome to the house of fun?

KairiNyaa Vyseryx quadraxis201 Ac3 Pilgrim59 thefinalgirl

 

[thefinalgirl]

As Maria proceeded to sing her song, a boy with cat ears had jumped from above and onto the thugs below. he had slayed most of the thugs, saving the life of the dwarf who she had met earlier. It seemed that he had taken an interest for her, since she was quite unusual due to her purplish skin and red eyes. She didn't like the attention that she had received from the cat boy. The woman heard some trouble brewing within the bar.

Maria started to run inside the bar to see a bunch of unconscious bodies and a group of people fighting against another group of ruffians. She wasn't happy with some thugs running about and causing trouble. The girl liked order and peace but, she would put first, the rights of a human being as she is one as well. She grabbed Levi's tail and prepared herself. She screamed into his tail, making Levi's head as a speaker, amplifying it to a powerful sound. The scream was unbearable, it made a very horrible sound.

When she stopped screaming, she noticed a thug and two clowns laying on the floor lifeless. She wasn't too proud of herself for killing a man but it had to be done to protect herself. Maria took another step forward sang at a clown directly. The clown became overwhelmed with emotions as he proceeded to tear up and flow his tears in a very ugly manner. It wasn't a pretty site. The clown's makeup ran down his cheeks and into the floor, it was an ugly site to look at. The zombie proceeded to put herself in a defensive state.

Maria's HP: 23/23

Thug D: -1/5
Clown A: -1/5
Clown B: -1/5
Clown C: 2/5 and crying.